- It’s never a bad week when Education Department press releases sound like the hottest porno movie you’ve ever seen.
- George Allen proves he’s not as dumb we think, cause he knows all the dirty bill introduction tactics.
- Allen’s drive and power to lead come from his heroic American God complex, as captured in oil and displayed, fifty feet long, in his terrifying (we assume) home.
- Angry old flyover state cause du jour is a boycott of Miller beer because of the “money” they “donated” to Mexican American charities. Malkin involved, obviously, so whole thing bound to be forgotten by Monday.
- ABC News stores genuine bullshit dangerously close to the Capitol.
- Anderson Cooper’s hoping his bedroom eyes will distract you from the fact that he’s been sent to personally kill Castro.
- In an attempt to get more Benjamins, Target screws up its Franklins. Though a genuine FDR “action” figure would surely sell like hotcakes too.
- Katherine Harris wins her primary, just like we knew she would. And victory is sweet, so sweet.
- We didn’t make it to Katy’s party, not that we were invited, but we did get to this one, and we still haven’t washed Chris Matthews’ or Tim Russert’s handshakes off.
- Please take some time from your busy September 11th anniversary planning, and think about some stuff no one else will tell you.
May 24, 2013
Wonkette’s Week in Review: They Are Not Long, The Days of Wine and Roses
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