Here’s the Good News You’re Not Hearing from Iraq:
Our boys overseas might — just might — still be able to access Wonkette. A source in Quantico tells us that a simple switch from Internet Explorer to Firefox might allow access to lots of supposedly blocked sites.
Alas, a Marine tells us that the situation is even worse than we could’ve imagined:
They also block The Onion, Comedy Central, and all computer gaming sites. We were told it is done to save bandwidth and to prevent people from loafing off at work. [...] I also think it might be based on what people are reading. If a site gets a lot of traffic and it’s not considered necessary for Marine Corps business it gets shut down. Well, except for ESPN and other sports sites. They’d have bloody riots on their hands if they did that.
He also added that these rules apply only to official work computers, and Wonkette is still available on computers in the charmingly named Morale, Welfare, and Recreation facilities. But if you don’t want to wait in that lengthy line (and those computers still block the porno), another operative gives the simplest workaround yet:
Tell the soldiers to go to http://www.google.com/language_tools?hl=en, go to the section labeled “Translate a Web Page”, type in wonkette.com, and select “translate from: portugese to english”. Google will try to translate your site, but since it probably won’t find any portugese words, it’ll spit the site back out in English.
But hosted on the non-blocked Google server. So we can write anything we want! Assfucking quagmire!
Anything for our boys in uniform.
Earlier: We’re Bringing the War Back Home