Tag: The View

Michael Cohen, Most Loyal Guy, Until He Isn’t! Wonkagenda For Thurs., April 19, 2018

Michael Cohen might be a snitch, Trump threatens to walk away from North Korea, and GOP coming for your healthcare (again). Your morning news brief.

Glenn Beck And Tomi Lahren Face Off In Court, Nation Prays For Meteor To Strike Them Both

The Blaze hired a 24-year-old monkey to sit in a cage and fling poo. It now complains that the monkey threw poo. Meanwhile, the monkey complains about the cage.
Also, they're not so crazy about his followers

Old President Lazy Ass Ready To Destroy America On Day Four

Donald Trump will go to work as president on Monday. If he feels like it.

Your Weekly Top Ten Features Wonkette Baby Being AN ADORABLE BEATNIK

YOU COME READ YOUR TOP TEN STORIES RIGHT NOW.

Super Smart Trump Campaign Manager Accidentally Admits Her Boss Is A Criminal LOL OMG WTF

Did Donald Trump do crime in Cuba? Of course he did, says his campaign manager Kellyanne Conway!
EW GAY

Kirk Cameron’s Moron Sister Promises No Gay-Bashing On New ‘Fuller House’ Show

If you are anything like All Patriotic Americans, you are at least morbidly curious to see what Netflix's new "Fuller House" re-up revival teevee program will be like. They are all growned-up now, and DJ Tanner (AKA Candace Cameron...
Still the dumbest book cover in the history of U.S. America

Silly Goose Allen West Casually Death Threats President Obama For Grabbing His Guns

GRRR ARGH RAGE MAD OBAMA'S TAKIN' YR GUNS BUT NOT IF ALLEN WEST CAN STOP IT OOH AHH ANGRY WORDS GRRRR!!!!!!!ELEVENTY!!!!!! So, failed congressman, disgraced soldier, dirty whore pervert and all around human erectile dysfunction Allen West is mad about a...
He remembers things.

Ben Carson Forgot To Never Forget New Jersey Muslims Celebrating 9/11

Oh Ben Carson, your brain needs another operation. We learned just recently that the esteemed presidential candidate's advisers have been having a mighty tough time re-programming his brain to be un-stupid about foreign policy, and it showed yet again...
Never Forget

Rick Santorum Beated Up Whoopi Goldberg And ISIS, Will Be Toughest President

Rick Santorum, whose polling throughout the primary season hasn't risen higher than Rick Santorum's dick when he discovers sexts from his wife's hot abortion doctor ex-boyfriend, has sent out a fundraising email. No, we do not know how the Washington...

Carly Fiorina Wants To Know Why She’s The Only Chick Who Gets Sexismed

Carly Fiorina's 15 minutes sure went by fast, didn't they? One minute she was nobody, the next minute she was that pathological liar who'd spouted a whole bunch of demonstrably untrue horsecrap about Planned Parenthood during the Republican debate...

Ben Carson Only Mentioned Hitler To Piss Off Liberals, LOL!

Guys. GUYS. It seems we have been at least 13 kinds of stupid dead wrong about Dr. Ben Carson's hot takes on U.S. America. Sure, he says things that we dummy lefties might consider questionable or inflammatory or inaccurate or...
EW GAY

Kirk Cameron’s Gay-Hatin’ Sister Hopes You Feel Real Bad About Having HIV

Oh man, fuck you, D.J. Tanner. So here is a one-act play called "Let's Shame The HIV/AIDS Boy." The cast of characters: Candace Cameron Bure, little sister of dumbass creationist wingnut and former hot shit child star Kirk Cameron. Candace,...
Troll so hard

Elizabeth Warren Loves Donald Trump’s Gay Communist Tax Plan

Hey, Senator Warren, whatcha doin? Oh, just going on "The View" and trolling the fuck out of the Republican primary by talking about how you just LOVE Donald Trump's super-liberal (read: mainstream) idea to make billionaires pay their fair...
EW GAY

Kirk Cameron’s Idiot Sister Hates Gays Almost As Good As He Does

Oh, DJ Tanner, how far you have fallen from your "Full House" days, when you were just an annoying teenager with a hot brother. Now your still-hot brother Kirk Cameron is creationist DSM-IV material, and you're on "The View"...

Sarah Palin Is Your New Barbara Walters, Why Not, Sure

So here's the feel-good story of the day: Sarah Palin thinks that maybe it would be a heck of a lot of fun to host The View, not that she's going to do that any more than she's going...
It's the cheesiest

Ben Carson So Glad His Welfare Mom Wasn’t Dependent On Government

Doctor Ben Carson, the neurosurgeon who thinks Obamacare is the worst thing since slavery, went on "The View" Tuesday and explained how we can Save America: “We have to help re-educate people about what America is,” a turn of...