Tag: nutrition

Trump Budget Dude Fails To See How ‘Starving’ Is A Bad Thing

These millionaires aren't going to tax cut THEMSELVES you know!

Michelle Obama Will Say Cusses Until You Eat Your Effin’ Vegetables

OH HEY, Wonkers, it is Friday, which means we usually like to throatcram you with NICE TIME, so here's one! Your first lady, Michelle Hussein Obama, is at it again, trying to force US Americans to maybe move their...
Dr. Ablow will see you now.

World’s Worst Psychiatrist Keith Ablow Opens Yap To Explain Michelle Obama Is A Disgusting Fatty

Oh Lord, Keith Ablow is on the teevee making grunting sounds with his facehole, and those grunts have somehow formed stupid, stupid words, and now Keith Ablow looks like an asshole. In other news, it’s Tuesday. Ablow was the designated penis...
Eating Cities is clearly a habit of Lizard People

Neil Cavuto Can’t Get Sportsball Man To Agree That Michelle Obama’s A Big Failure

It was a classic Battle of the Agendas on Fox News Monday, as Seattle Seahawks star Russell Wilson, promoting a United Way summer program to feed poor kids while school is out, went up against anchormuppet Neil Cavuto, who...

Nutritionist Tucker Carlson: We Should Do Something About All These Disgusting Fat Poors

Tucker Carlson, who plays a human being on Fox's Outnumbered, explained the connection between obesity and poverty Wednesday, pointing out that poor people are only fat because the government keeps giving them food, and that there's no such thing...

Legislative Badass: Rep. Jim McGovern Stands Up For Poor, Hungry; GOP Says STFU

Remember how much Republicans want people to go hungry? And how much they don't care about the poors and kids (except for the unborn masturbating kind?) But amongst the fecal-dwelling goblin-cave that is Capitol Hill, a hero stands ready...

Michelle Obama Halts War On Obesity And Anusburgers

Drudge sirens and frantic arm flapping: a Washington Post reporter saw "War on Childhood Obesity" Gen. Michelle Obama over at the new Shake Shack diner in D.C. engaging in "talks" with one of those giant crushed cow-horse-goat anus cakes...

Michelle Obama Confusing Everyone With Colorful Health Things

Michelle Obama is trying very hard to help Americans slim down so they can stop buying clothes with sizes in the triple digits. She is probably so frustrated right now, because she has tried so many things. She has...

Teabag Lady First Person Ever To Use ‘Forced Down Our Throats’ Correctly

If you follow American politics and you have a soul, one of your least favorite phrases is some variation of "forced down our throats." This is generally used to imply that some law or regulation has gone into...

Obama Puts White House Guests On Starvation Diet

Rumor has it that people who have attended the White House's many recent dinner functions are peeved that they didn't get enough food. Apparently meals are served in "tiny little portions," maybe in the French style? We all know...