Tag: department of homeland security

E.T. Phones VOICE Hotline

We could outsource the call center to Yoyodyne Industries.

Jason Chaffetz Sure He’s As Clean As A Whistle, Because Of All These Enemas (He Said That)

How could Jason Chaffetz POSSIBLY have a secret scandal, when there are so many people cleaning out his butt every day?

Twitter Won’t Unmask Rogue ‘Alt-Gov’ Accounts To Help Trump, Is That Even Legal?

Government attempt to unmask Twitter user gets a Fail Whale.

Trump’s Dumbass Budget Proposal Totally Great, If You Want To Start World War III

Fuck the poors, though. And the environment. And the arts. All that stuff is lame.

Craven Dicksnot Rep. Jason Chaffetz CAN’T WAIT To Investigate Obama’s ‘Wire Tapp’ On Trump!

Jason Chaffetz needs to go feast on a bag of dicks.
Check their wallets first

Let’s Pretend Justice Department’s Reversal On Private Prisons Isn’t Just Big Payoff For Campaign Cash

Don't wanna cause a big s-s-sensation / Just Talkin' 'Bout Incarceration.
Father Forgive them, for they are dumb as fuck like whoa.

Trump Might Send 100,000 National Guard Troops To Round Up Illegal Mexicans. Totally Normal.

Hey, know who ELSE rounded up lots of people?

Clip And Save! It’s Your Splendid Lawsplainer Of The Muslim Ban And The Courts!

Why Is the Muslim Ban in All the Courts at Once? Let's Wonksplore!

Federal Judge Orders Long Layover In Seattle For Trump’s Travel Ban

So here's a big setback for That Man In the White House. He'll probably react with grace and poise.
Gaul is supposed to be a big deal, but it's very disappointing. Terrible golf. Sad!

Hold On To That Refugee Nice Time, Because Trump Is Telling All Those Judges To F*ck Right Out Of Here

Is violating a federal court order really all that bad if you really think it's necessary?

Judge Orders Trump To Bring Deported Iranian Man Back To U.S., Be His Butler

Good news! A judge has ordered the government to fetch back an Iranian traveler it illegally deported. But there's a catch.

Sean Spicer: Thank Trump For Protecting Us From Terrorist 5-Year-Olds. THANK HIM OR ELSE.

White House press secretary Sean Spicer wants us to recognize that five-year-olds are a definite threat to America.