Tag: bruce rauner

London Having Fucking TERRIBLE Year. Wonkagenda For Mon., June 19, 2017

Trump's lawyer thinks you should ignore his tweets, John Ossoff's race is getting dirty, and Megyn Kelly is MEAN to Alex Jones. Your morning news brief!

Let’s Go To The Tape! Wonkagenda for May 15, 2017

Why does Trump tape himself, the alt-right rallies (for 10 minutes), and will Spicey get "You're Fired?" Your morning news brief!

Jeff Sessions Will White Wash America. Wonkagenda For Thurs., Feb. 9, 2017

Neil Gorsuch snaps at Trump, Sean Spicer spits fake news, and all your late night show videos all in one! Your morning news brief!
all you banksters, you must go

Promising White Collar Prosecutions Undoubtedly Safe In Hands Of Jeff B. Sessions

Despite the widespread lender fraud endemic to the foreclosure crisis, nary a Wall Street Big Wig felt the wrath of the criminal justice system. But just in time for Obama's Third Term, the Feds are giving financiers the business. The...
Thanks but no thanks

GOP Governor Rauner Will Let Illinois Grow Ganja, For Your Health

Republican gazillionaire and super-expensive wine enthusiast Bruce Rauner has a long history of being a total jerk-faced jerk, even though he has only been governor of Illinois for about five and half seconds. But high five for this one,...
He's just a regular super rich guy who's a total dick

Illinois Gov. Rauner Halts ‘Non-Essential’ Spending Except For His Wife

Pretend Populist and Actual Uber-Wealthy Bully Bruce Rauner is your new governor, Illinois. So all you working stiffs better take notice because your days of making reasonable compensation in consideration for your labor might be numbered. After all, the state is facing...
This is of course ridiculous. Fluttershy wouldn't even make it to the stage.

Deleted Comments Of The Week: You People Lost An Election, So Shut Up Now

As you may have heard, there was an election this week, and The People Have Spoken. Or at least The People who bothered to vote have spoken, and they are the ones what matter. Not surprisingly, the results of...
Wonkette does not allow magic scrolls, either.

Deleted Comments Of The Week: Electoral Dysfunction Edition

Is it Saturday already? Must be time to put on the old Hazmat suit -- which we never leave the house without now, on account of the 'bola -- and go skim off the worst of the dumbth in...
Who's got two thumbs and is a total jerk? This guy!

Wow, Bajillionaire Bruce Rauner Is A Real A-Hole

This guy. Jesus, this guy. Republican Bruce Rauner, who has more money than God and a better wine collection too, wants to be the next dude to get evicted from the Illinois governor's mansion and sent to prison. (That's what...
He's just a regular super rich guy who's a total dick

Did Bazillionaire Bruce Rauner Bully A Reporter Out Of His Job? Yes. Yes, He Did.

Bruce Rauner, the Republican candidate for Illinois governor, is just a regular guy with a van. Oh, and a $100,000 wine club membership. And some Cayman Islands cash. And a charming disposition, by which we mean he allegedly said...
It's really not that hard

Some Dumb Lady: Consent Will Ruin Good Sex, Boo Hoo

This dumb lady writer at Reason has a real confuse and thinks California's new consent law makes sex no fun anymore. Sad face. Feminists are super excited about California's newly minted "yes means yes" law that they claim will not...

Congress Takes Quick Break From Vacation To ‘Work’ For Almost Five Whole Minutes

We all know that no one works harder than members of Congress. That's why they totally deserve that barely livable annual salary of $174,000, which is technically higher than the minimum wage no one needs because if you own...
He's just a regular super rich guy who's a total dick

Zillionaire Bruce Rauner Has An Old Van, So Illinois Must Make Him Governor

Bejillionaire Republican Bruce Rauner would very much like to be the next governor of Illinois, and would like everyone to know what a regular, ordinary guy he is. Sure, maybe he occasionally indulges in a few nice things, like...
There's no place like Napa

Next Governor Of Illinois Could Bail Out EU With His Wine Collection

Republican gazillionaire Bruce Rauner is richer than you. And you. And you. And all of us put together. He counts his millions by the hundreds. And he'd like to be the next governor of Illinois -- which, given that...

Guy Running For Illinois Gov Cheated On First Wife 20 Years Ago, And Business Insider Is ON IT.

Where were you when you heard the news that some guy running for Illinois governor cheated on his first wife 20 years ago? Was it right now, because who the fuck cares, Jesus Christ? Nobody seems to have picked...