Sportsball

Easy on the eyes, just saying.

Sexxxy Green Bay Packers Quarterback Tells Refugee Haters To Eat Astroturf

The past few days have been sad and disheartening. We began the weekend mourning with our friends in Paris in the aftermath of terrorist attacks meant to, well, terrorize. And then many of our own American citizens, including Republican...

Michael Phelps And His Fiancée Have A Gigantic Fight

Hey, this totally could have happened, you don't know.

Will Sportsball Hero Tim Tebow Someday Be First Virgin Dork President Of America?

Tim Tebow is known for two things, mainly. He loves Jesus so hard, in the manliest way possible, and he refuses to put his dick inside the endzones of either ladies or gentlemen. Like, he is so great at virginity...
RNC Chair Reince Priebus

North Carolina GOP Throws Hilarious Tantrum Over NCAA Being Nice To Transgender Peeps

The NCAA has pulled championship games out of North Carolina, citing the state's godawful and discriminatory HB2 law. UNFAIR!

Serena Williams Ends Sexism, Racism With Sportsball Throne. Just Kidding!

Earlier today, Serena Williams, part-time tennis virtuoso and full-time eradicator of universes, was awarded the Sports Illustrated Sportsperson Of The Year. Huzzah! No one could possibly be upset about such a deserving athletic superstar receiving recognition for her many...

Trump’s D.C. Dilemmas: Your Wonkagenda: Friday, November 11, 2016

Trumpkins suddenly want DC jobs, Megyn Kelly has a secret, Elizabeth Warren's words of wisdom. Your daily news brief.
You have the right to free speech as long as you're not dumb enough to actually try it.

Donald Trump Ready To Deport Sportsballer Colin Kaepernick For Anti-Flag Crimethink

America is a land of boundless freedom, as long as you don't say anything unkind about it in relation to the flag or national anthem.

NBC And Fox News Very Concerned About The Cosmetic Choices Of Female Olympic Athletes!

Should they wear make-up so men like Bo Dietl don't get squicked out watching them on the TV? Let's discuss!
Stop fooling around, JIMMY!

Barack Obama To Sportsball Guy: Take My Wife, Please!

Barack Obama, world president, sat down with some sportsball guy and they totally bro-ed down on some sportsball things, about which we do not care. But included in their amiable chatting and hale-fellow-well-met, were a couple of sparkling gems...

Barack Obama Mentors Basketball Person Steph Curry In Sexxxy Sportstime Nice Time Video

Steph Curry, are you aware of him? He is basically the most incredible basketball player alive and if you are a fan of the Sport Of Hoops, this makes you either love him or hate him (or both). Like...

Forget Ryan Lochte, Let’s Talk About This Hot Medal-Winning American Gymnast Gettin’ Nekkid!

Danell Levya has won two silver medals in Rio, and even better, he is a TOTAL feminist and a super-supporter of LGBT rights.

Donald Trump’s Debate Prep Strategy Mostly Involves Prepping To Weasel Out Of Debating

Donald Trump didn't just spend the weekend beating up on the family of a war hero, oh, heavens no! The man is a master of multi-weaseling, as he demonstrated in his Sunday interview with George Stephanopoulos on ABC's "This...
Drop Kick Me Jesus

Georgia High School Adds Baptisms To Football Practice, Benches Constitution

Residents of Villa Rica, Georgia, are astonished that anyone could have a problem with a group baptism of football players on school grounds before a recent F'ball practice. Because they love America, and Jebus, and F'ball -- which is why it...
The website has two full paragraphs explaining the 'significance' of this t-shirt.

Stupidest Man On Internet So Sad For Oppressed Wisconsin High School Racists

Five students in Elkhorn, Wisconsin, will be disciplined for shouting "Donald Trump! Build that wall!" (and allegedly other racial slurs) at black and Latina high school soccer players from visiting Beloit Memorial High School last week, and Jim Hoft,...