Sportsball

Will Sportsball Hero Tim Tebow Someday Be First Virgin Dork President Of America?

Tim Tebow is known for two things, mainly. He loves Jesus so hard, in the manliest way possible, and he refuses to put his dick inside the endzones of either ladies or gentlemen. Like, he is so great at virginity...
The website has two full paragraphs explaining the 'significance' of this t-shirt.

Stupidest Man On Internet So Sad For Oppressed Wisconsin High School Racists

Five students in Elkhorn, Wisconsin, will be disciplined for shouting "Donald Trump! Build that wall!" (and allegedly other racial slurs) at black and Latina high school soccer players from visiting Beloit Memorial High School last week, and Jim Hoft,...

Michael Phelps And His Fiancée Have A Gigantic Fight

Hey, this totally could have happened, you don't know.

What Are Fox News Patriots Saying About Terrible, Horrible America-Hater Colin Kaepernick?

Did you hear Kaepernick is a secret Islamic? Sean Hannity did!

Badass Little Girl With Robot Hand Is Most Valuable Pitcher Of ALL TIME BASEBALL HISTORY

You need a nice story. Read this nice story RIGHT NOW, MORANS.

LAS VEGAS HORROR. Wonkagenda For Mon., Oct. 2, 2017

If we cover another story today, it'll probably be Puerto Rico. Otherwise, here are some things that *would* have been news today. Your morning news brief!

The Mantrumpian Candidate. Your Wonkagenda, Tuesday, November 1, 2016

Trump's dirty money, Evan McMullin's robot problem, and Megyn Kelly's dead-end job! Your morning news brief!

Papa John’s Guy Sad That NFL Players Care More About Police Brutality Than His Pizza Sales

Apparently there is a lot of crossover between people who love police brutality and also love shitty pizza.

Don’t Come Around Here No More. Wonkagenda For Tues., Oct. 3, 2017

Your morning news brief will talk about everything, and is not changing the subject.

Guess Donald Trump Thinks Chicago Cubs Can Eff Right Off

To be fair, maybe the only reason Trump has failed to congratulate the Cubs is that he's classless trash.
Kneeling is SO disrespectful!

TRUMP UNITES AMERICA! (Behind The Strong, Classy Black Dudes Playing The Foosball)

Trump Sportsball Tweet Has Opposite Of Intended Effect - Whoa If True!

Trump Pisses Off Puerto Rico. Wonkagenda for Oct. 4, 2017

Trump pissed off Puerto Rico, REXXON is mouthing off, and Megyn Kelly LOVES the NRA. Your morning news brief.

Dumb Fake Golfer Story Is Why Lunatic Trump Thinks All The Voters Are Illegal

So now we know at least part of the reason Donald Trump is sure there are millions of illegal voters who kept him from winning the popular vote in the election he won: When he told members of Congress...

Loser Trump Losing Culture War To The Big Men Who Play With Balls

Hey you guys, Donald Trump is bitching about athletes on Twitter again, CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?