Sportsball

Will Sportsball Hero Tim Tebow Someday Be First Virgin Dork President Of America?

Tim Tebow is known for two things, mainly. He loves Jesus so hard, in the manliest way possible, and he refuses to put his dick inside the endzones of either ladies or gentlemen. Like, he is so great at virginity...
The website has two full paragraphs explaining the 'significance' of this t-shirt.

Stupidest Man On Internet So Sad For Oppressed Wisconsin High School Racists

Five students in Elkhorn, Wisconsin, will be disciplined for shouting "Donald Trump! Build that wall!" (and allegedly other racial slurs) at black and Latina high school soccer players from visiting Beloit Memorial High School last week, and Jim Hoft,...

Michael Phelps And His Fiancée Have A Gigantic Fight

Hey, this totally could have happened, you don't know.

What Are Fox News Patriots Saying About Terrible, Horrible America-Hater Colin Kaepernick?

Did you hear Kaepernick is a secret Islamic? Sean Hannity did!

Badass Little Girl With Robot Hand Is Most Valuable Pitcher Of ALL TIME BASEBALL HISTORY

You need a nice story. Read this nice story RIGHT NOW, MORANS.

Fox News Non-Racist Would Like To Know Who Let All These Gaywads And Blacks Into His Olympics

He is SO MAD that ... 20 of the 243 American athletes are black or Asian and two are gay. And NOT because that's too few.

LAS VEGAS HORROR. Wonkagenda For Mon., Oct. 2, 2017

If we cover another story today, it'll probably be Puerto Rico. Otherwise, here are some things that *would* have been news today. Your morning news brief!

The Mantrumpian Candidate. Your Wonkagenda, Tuesday, November 1, 2016

Trump's dirty money, Evan McMullin's robot problem, and Megyn Kelly's dead-end job! Your morning news brief!

Papa John’s Guy Sad That NFL Players Care More About Police Brutality Than His Pizza Sales

Apparently there is a lot of crossover between people who love police brutality and also love shitty pizza.

Did Russia Hack Adam Rippon’s Score In Free Skate Last Night, Like A Common Wisconsin?

Are the Olympic judges fucking kidding right now?

Don’t Come Around Here No More. Wonkagenda For Tues., Oct. 3, 2017

Your morning news brief will talk about everything, and is not changing the subject.

Guess Donald Trump Thinks Chicago Cubs Can Eff Right Off

To be fair, maybe the only reason Trump has failed to congratulate the Cubs is that he's classless trash.
Kneeling is SO disrespectful!

TRUMP UNITES AMERICA! (Behind The Strong, Classy Black Dudes Playing The Foosball)

Trump Sportsball Tweet Has Opposite Of Intended Effect - Whoa If True!

Why Did Mike Pence Go All The Way To The Olympics To Embarrass America When He Can Just Do That At Home?

It's a pity Mike Pence went to the Olympics in the first place.