National Politics

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Meet Donald Trump’s Grifty Pick For Interior Dept., Montana Rep. ‘Commander’ Zinke!

Good news! Trump's Interior Department choice only wants to exploit federal lands, not turn them over to gun-toting yahoos. Baby steps, right?

Wonkagenda: Friday, September 9, 2016

You get in here and read your news brief, RIGHT NOW!
Cowboy Bebop at his computer

At Least Nevada Wingnut Sharron Angle Didn’t Say She Is Nelson Mandela

Perennial Nevada looniebird Sharron Angle, who's pursuing another hilarious run for the U.S. Senate, would like us all to think about the coming metaphorical war for the soul of these United States, and whether we are prepared to fight...

Let’s All Apply For This Trump-Fluffing Job At ConservativeDailyPost.com!

Do YOU have what it takes to be a Trump-loving journalist who makes words good?

Donald Trump Has Probably Never Met ‘Apprentice’ Contestant He Sex-Groped, ALLEGEDLY

Trump was saying he never groped those women at a North Carolina rally, and immediately, Gloria Allred's press conference started.

Donald Trump Will End Terrorism By Building A Wall around Teleprompters

Donald Trump presented his much-anticipated plan to defeat ISIS Monday. It wasn't so much a "plan" as a bunch of "slogans." But by god, we'll say Radical Islamic Terrorism a whole lot.

Sarah Palin And Some Dead Hog Ready To Watch Tonight’s Wisconsin Primary Results

Oh hi, Wonkers, are you at home lying in bed under the covers because you're scared to watch the Wisconsin Primary results come in? WELL STOP DOING THAT, YOU SAD DICKS, because the polls are about to close! Also too,...

The ‘Alt-Right’ Twitter Purge Explained With Cartoon Deer

A cartoon! You like cartoons!

If This Hillary Clinton Ad Doesn’t Make You Cry, You Are Dead Inside

Hillary Clinton is a really, really good person.

Is Lindsey Graham Falling For Donald Trump In Spite Of Himself?

Lindsey Graham is now reportedly asking Republican donors to get behind Trump.

British Member Of Parliament Jo Cox Murdered; American Gun Nuts Have A Good Larf

Jo Cox, a member of Parliament, has been murdered. Americans who love their guns are excited by the chance to point out that British gun control laws can't stop every murder, so obviously laws are worthless.
Nothing to see here, g'wan, get him outta here. Get him out!

New York Attorney General Somehow Under Impression Trump Foundation Might Be Kind Of Fishy

New York A.G. Eric Schneiderman is investigating the Trump Foundation just because it may have engaged in some illegal donations. How is that even fair?
Yaoi? Yowie!

Gay-Hatin’ Kentucky Clerks Having Real Bad Week

Pour out a 40 for the gay-hating county clerks of Kentucky, who are losing their brave battle to refuse to do their jobs in the name of Jesus. First up, we have Kim Davis, the clerk of Rowan County,...
You too can scam your way to the Republican nomination. Ask me how!

Trump Lawyers Think Trump Should Not Have To Stand Trial For Fraud Now, Because ‘Reasons’

Trump will be too busy to face trial on fraud charges. I feel like I've heard this somewhere before?

Shit Sandwiches A Dish Best Served Cold. Wonkagenda For Fri., Feb. 17, 2017

The Muslim Ban is DEAD, Trump's NSC pick turns down the job, and Paul Ryan unveils Trump/RyanCare Your morning news brief!

New Hampshire Republican Spits Bill Clinton’s Penis At Hillary, With Words

At a town hall event in New Hampshire Sunday, Hillary Clinton got a taste of New England's tradition of participatory democracy, as immortalized in Norman Rockwell's classic painting celebrating free speech. Except instead of a Jimmy-Stewartish kind of regular...