National Politics

President Lazy-Ass Taking 17-Day Vacation, Because He Lacks Obama’s Stamina We Guess

To be fair, failure is EXHAUSTING.

Donald Trump Grants President Obama Retroactive Citizenship

Donald Trump finally decided he's beaten the dead Birther horse about as much as he can. So now he's on to lying about other stuff.
He gets cranky if there's no pudding

GOP Senator Says Be Sweet To Donald Trump, For He Is But A Tiny Suckling Infant

Meanwhile, Mitch McConnell would like Trump to stop playing with himself, pull his pants up and USE HIS WORDS.

Queen Elizabeth Will See Donald Trump IN HELL

Sounds like President Dumbass might not get that state visit with the Queen!
Serious Trump is Serious

If President Donald Trump Tortures You, That Means It’s Not Illegal

Donald Trump loves him some torture, so much. Whenever he can, he explains how he'd bring back waterboarding -- and more! -- and maybe also kill some terrorists' families, because you gotta be tough with these animals. In Thursday's debate,...
They didn't sell a lot of records, but everyone who heard them grabbed someone by the pussy.

Case Closed: Trump Victim Actually Groped By Velvet Underground Song

The real groper is obviously Lou Reed.

Watch Elizabeth Warren, Hillary Clinton Girl Power You Right In The Nads!

Get out your vegan artisanal freerange lube of choice, because now WE MASTURBATE!
This screengrab is so mean, but why not?

John Kasich Doing Something Today Too, We Dunno, We Weren’t Listening

Oh hell, in all our jizz-citement over Ted Cruz running away to eat a million cans of soup by himself in hell, and in our glee about the loser #NeverTrump people beating themselves up over what a terrible, horrible,...

Kamala Harris Jumps Aboard The Single Payer Train

Hey! Good senator backing a good idea! We like it.

Trump And Chuck Grassley Definitely Phone-Sexing About Corn And Not Trump Jr.’s Coming Senate Grilling. FOR SURE.

This definitely has nothing to do with how Donald Trump Jr. is about to testify before Grassley's Senate Judiciary Committee.
P.S. They ARE crackpots

Devil Hillary Clinton Deviously Rigging Elections For Paul Ryan Now, Probably

God, Hillary, will you stop at NOTHING?

Did James Comey Screw Hillary Because Of A Dumb Russian Spam Email? WHOA IF TRUE!

Hope he didn't send a million dollars to a Nigerian prince too, like GEEZ.

Texas? What About Taxes? Wonkagenda For Thurs., Aug. 31, 2017

Trump already ignores Houston, Kamala Harris is Berning up, and Robert Mueller calls for backup! Your morning news brief!

Trey Gowdy Eats Own Dick In Front Of Former CIA Director, How Embarrassing

Is Trey Gowdy the dumbest fucking cracker in Congress again? WHOA IF TRUE!

Scott Walker Ends Climate Change, By Censoring It From State Website. Thanks Scott Walker!

Scott Walker takes the lead in throwing climate change down the memory hole.