Elections

Me is the president I have been waiting for!

Jeb! Bush Poised For Triumphant Comeback Literally Any Moment Now

Life sure sucks free-range rooster cock if you are Jeb Bush. But it also sucks if you work on Jeb's flailing presidential campaign, a term we are using very loosely at this point. If you're part of the Iowa ground...
Also, there are some kickass coupons for Sofas & Quills

Wonkagenda: Tuesday, September 20, 2016

You get in here and read your news brief, RIGHT NOW!
Both screencaps are from teevee shows starting with 'State of...' Isn't that something?

Let’s Kick Debbie Wasserman Schultz Around One More Time, For Old Time’s Sake

Just in time for the Democratic National Convention, Debbie-Wasserman Schultz has fired herself. Bloody well about time.

Hey Mr. Trump: Is A Muslim War Hero’s Father American Enough For You?

The final night of the Democratic National Convention belonged to Hillary Clinton and her speech accepting the party's nomination, but it was owned by Mr. Khizr Khan, the father of Army Captain Humayun S.M. Khan, who died in Iraq...

Congress Budget Deal: Yes We (Kicked The) Can! Wonkagenda for May 1, 2017

Congress pats itself on the back, the press celebrates is self, and Sean Hannity is going to sue everyone! Your morning news brief!

‘Democrat’ Jim Webb Pretty Sure It’s CNN’s Fault He’s Not Going To Be President

Hey, all you-all, let's all point and laugh at this crybaby loser dick-mold Jim Webb boo-hooing all over himself because he losered the Democratic debate on Tuesday night: “It was rigged in terms of who was going to get time...
Don't go away mad. Just go away.

Old Cracker Sheriff Joe Arpaio Loses Re-Election, Still Faces Jail Time (Lock Him Up!)

America's Most Publicity-Seeking Sheriff is out on his keister.

Four Iowa Democrats Fight To Take Over Chuck Grassley’s Twitter Account: Your Senate Sunday

Iowa Sen. Chuck Grassley is infamous for all the dumb stuff he's said on Twitter. Democrats would really like to try to help him find a better use for his time after November.
He Declared Bankruptcy For Your Sins

IRS Comes For Donald Trump Because Of How Much He Loves Jesus

In an exciting plot twist, to which we give a very enthusiastic three thumbs up, Republicans want to peek at Donald Trump's tax returns. And Mitt Romney -- MITT ROMNEY!!! -- started it! Now all the Republicans want a look, and not just...

Clinton And Sanders Unite To Sue Holy Hell Out Of Those Arizona Bastards: A Nice Time!

a href="http://wonkette.com/600701/bernie-and-hillary-agree-loudly-at-each-other-for-two-shouty-hours"Isn't it nice when primary candidates can move past their bickering and unite on issues that matter, like the need to improve health care (but not how) or to raise the minimum wage (but not how) or women's...
Gary Larson did it better. But Trump IS a vulture...

Donald Trump Just Wondering If Hillary Is A Muslim Or What. You Know, Like Her Girlfriend Maybe.

Donald Trump is questioning Hillary Clinton's faith. And her commitment to Sparkle Motion.

Donald Trump Punches Everyone In Their Little Marcos: GOP Debate Liveblog

Who is getting cold-cocked by Donald Trump tonight? Ted Cruz? (Probably.) Marco Rubio? (Definitely.) John Kasich? (Nah, no one cares about him.) Some poor protesting dude or dudette? A Breitbart reporter? ALL OF 'EM KATIE!? It is a day, and...

Wonkagenda: Tuesday, August 9, 2016

You get in here and read your newz breif, RIGHT NOW!

Trump’s Inner Circle Now A Firing Squad. Yr Wonkagenda: Wednesday, November 16, 2016

Rudy Giuliani's dirty, filthy money, Ben Carson admits he's A Idiot, and Steve Bannon kind of hates Jews. Your daily news brief.