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15 Things Bill O’Reilly Got Wrong While Laughing At How Stupid These Hippies Are

Watch the latest video at video.foxnews.com Above you will find a video from Bill O'Reilly. It is a stupid video, there is no need to watch it. In this stupid video, which you should definitely not watch, O'Reilly sends his...

Ha Ha Oh God, Michael Steele’s Secret Book Comes Out Today

Oh snap, Michael Steele's new joint hits the streets today. Not that you haven't had the bootleg since October (before it was even conceived, most likely). It is a creative approach, here, to equate your potential audience with alcoholics...

Did Obama Barf On Japan’s Prime Minister?!

Oh noes this is almost a diplomatic incident or something! Here is Barack Obama leaning ominously over the lap of Japanese Premier Taro Aso during a fancy G-8 summit dinner. White House photographer Pete Souza has surely been around...
He Declared Bankruptcy For Your Sins

Donald Trump Is Yoogest Evangelical, Also A Jew For Jesus Maybe

More big Donald Trump news today: Now that he's finally found a Bible verse he likes (even if it doesn't exist), he is doing his very best to suck up to the wackiest fringes of the evangelist movement. Not necessarily the...

Bristol Palin Knows Who Has A Penis And Who Has A Vagina

It was just another day at the office at Bristol Palin Writin' Stuff Real Good Industries, LLC. Bristol was mad, because her personal assistant had gotten her lunch order wrong. Two KFC Double Downs, a bottle of Boone's Farm...

World Ending, Michelle Obama Rocks the Costa del Sol

What the H-E-Double-Hockey-Sticks is going on? Your editor just returned from a frantic/miserable week of "summer vacation," with nothing but occasional glances at the USA Today to remind him of this American Politics/Collapse thing -- did you know America...

Anti-Immigrant Video Ruined By Common Street Mimes

Oh right, there was *another* march on the Capitol yesterday, too. It was about Shamnesty, the Irish-Hispanic effort to have lazy Mexicans steal all the white people's jobs picking lettuce in Yuma and separating the chicken feet at the...

North Carolina Rep. Renee Ellmers’ Family Loves Guns So Much They Shared An AR-15 With Whoever Stole It

North Carolina Congressdope Renee Ellmers, who recently became a Wonket Hero for her brave stance on accepting her congressional paycheck during the shutdown -- "I need my paycheck. That's the bottom line" -- has once again ascended the summit...

Jesse Ventura Makes Obvious Career Move

We all hoped he would run for vice president, with Ron Paul, or maybe run against Al Franken or something, but famous independent wrestler Jesse Ventura will instead host a teevee show about conspiracy theories. Today is just one...

Late Show Liveblogging Barack’s Big Night

The night 'o liveblogging continues with this, your post-post Obama semi-State of the Union liveblog. And how about that Bobby Jindal? Sunday School will never be the same, right? (GOOD THING ADULTS DON'T GO TO SUNDAY SCHOOL.) What a...

Hero Lady Cop Will Probably Be Fired For Stopping Police Beatdown, Because Duh

Bogota, New Jersey, police officer Regina Tasca responded to a call about a young man who was being erratic. She was supposed to transport him to the hospital. Two of her fellow officers, though, thought they were more supposed...
The comments section at Gawker?

Seattle To Be Destroyed By Biggest Earthquake Ever, Bye Seattle!

OK, Portland and Seattle Wonkers, this is a public service announcement. We are going to need you to find buddies in the comments section (which does not exist), and beg them to let you crash on their couch, because...

Former Celebrity Apprentice Contestant Jose Canseco Accidentally Murders Poor Al Gore

It seems like maybe Jose Canseco is not that smart of a guy. (And no, Magic Johnson is probably not going to hire him at 1B for the new, improved, mostly-McCourt-free Dodgers.) HOWEVER! He is very sweetly (and dumbly)...
Yay, medals and awards for all of you!

BREAKING: Senate Republicans Very Proud Of Themselves For Doing A Thing

Here is some BREAKING news from Senate Republicans, and you know it is BREAKING because it says so, right there. What is this BREAKING news bipartisanship of which they speak? Let us watch their video, in which we will surely...

The Stupidest Man On The Internet’s History Of Stupid Gay Stories: A Stupid Review

Rightwing blogger Jim Hoft came out Monday as a gay homosexual, and we decided to look at the careful line he walked: Condemning Islamic crimes against gays, while neither clearly supporting nor condemning gay rights in America.

Nancy Pelosi Doesn’t Understand Why John Boehner Cries So Much

Nancy Pelosi did an interview with Sunday's The New York Times Magazine in which she let America know that she was not put on the cover of a different, money-hemorrhaging magazine (Time) when she became House speaker. But John...