Local News

Pervert Governor Eric Greitens Tells Missouri GOP To Come And Take It

Couldn't happen to a nicer political party!

Nikki Haley Claps Back. Wonkagenda For Wed., April 18, 2018

Eric Greitens shit getting WILD, Barbara Bush dead at 92, and a BLUE WAVE A-COMIN'. Your morning news brief.

Ryan Zinke Says He’s A Geologist, Is Full Of Schist.

Navy Seal pretends he's a geologist on Twitter.

Jerry Brown Shoves California National Guard Up Trump’s Ass. Ow, That Smarts!

Jerry Brown seems to think the National Guard should do National Guard stuff, not Border Patrol stuff.

Black Men Arrested For Grand Theft Sitting At Philadelphia Starbucks

Store employee who called the cops on the men has come to a mutual understanding with the company that she is terrible and no longer works there.

Hannity Denies Denies Denies Denies. Wonkagenda For Tues., April 17, 2018

Hannity tries to splain his bromance with Michael Cohen, Trump strangles his Russian sanctions in their crib, and Ryan Zinke is a commander of geology! Your morning news brief.

Oh, James Comey, You Sassy Bitch! Wonkagenda For April 16, 2018

James Comey spills his guts, Michael Cohen tries to hide his shit, and Trump mad he has to be mean to Putin. Your morning news brief.

Midterm Madness: ‘Iron Stache’ Gets Ready To Punch A Nazi In Wisconsin’s 1st

The race to replace Paul Ryan in Wisconsin's 1st District is about to get messy.

This Is Stupid Watergate. Wonkagenda For Fri., April 13, 2018

James Comey spills the beans, Trump wants ANOTHER mulligan, and Michael Cohen recorded EVERYTHING! Your morning news brief!

Is There More ICE Fuckery And Evil Today? Is It A Day In 2018?

This isn't even close to normal. This will take years for the light to normal to reach.
Seriously, we literally never watch you pee

Anchorage, Alaska, Voters Tell Bathroom Panty Sniffers To FUCK OFF

Alaska Bible-thumpers losing the Culture Wars. Oh. How sad.

Bannon’s Back! Back Again! Bannon’s Back! Tell A Friend! Wonkagenda For Thurs., April 12, 2018

Trump can't make up his mind on Syria, Eric Greitens is a creepy sex monster, and Mark Zuckerberg really is an asshole. Your morning news brief.
Advising people on the economics of death.

Bakersfield’s Sheriff Wants You To Die

Ignore the fact that Kern County is America's deadliest for police shootings, this was *out of context* man!
Obviously

Fuck You Guys, Paul Ryan’s Out Of Here! Wonkagenda For Wed., April 11, 2018

Trump's firing Mueller (or Rosenstein), Zuckerberg did his best Data impression, and watch out Syria, Trump gonna wag your dog. Your morning news brief!

Donald Trump Having A VERY Bad Day. Wonkagenda For Tues., April 10, 2018

WITCH HUNT! ATTORNEY CLIENT PRIVILEGE IS DEAD! FOAM FOAM RABID BAT FOAM!