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Oh, James Comey, You Sassy Bitch! Wonkagenda For April 16, 2018

James Comey spills his guts, Michael Cohen tries to hide his shit, and Trump mad he has to be mean to Putin. Your morning news brief.

Trump Bombs Syria, Declares ‘Mission Accomplished’ Like A Common Dubya

Congressional Democrats are pissed he did it without approval from Congress.

This Is Stupid Watergate. Wonkagenda For Fri., April 13, 2018

James Comey spills the beans, Trump wants ANOTHER mulligan, and Michael Cohen recorded EVERYTHING! Your morning news brief!

Bannon’s Back! Back Again! Bannon’s Back! Tell A Friend! Wonkagenda For Thurs., April 12, 2018

Trump can't make up his mind on Syria, Eric Greitens is a creepy sex monster, and Mark Zuckerberg really is an asshole. Your morning news brief.
Obviously

Fuck You Guys, Paul Ryan’s Out Of Here! Wonkagenda For Wed., April 11, 2018

Trump's firing Mueller (or Rosenstein), Zuckerberg did his best Data impression, and watch out Syria, Trump gonna wag your dog. Your morning news brief!

Kentucky Midterm Madness: Lady Fighter Pilot Dukes It Out With Nice Old Man To Take On Trump Doucher!

Kentucky's got a serious race, and we ain't talking about the damn horses.

Donald Trump Having A VERY Bad Day. Wonkagenda For Tues., April 10, 2018

WITCH HUNT! ATTORNEY CLIENT PRIVILEGE IS DEAD! FOAM FOAM RABID BAT FOAM!

Bolton’s Mustache Walks Into White House. Wonkagenda For Mon., April 9, 2018

John Bolton's Baptism by Fire, Trump's Towering inferno, and another Syrian chemical weapons attack. Your morning news brief.

Scott Pruitt, Superfund Site! Wonkagenda For Fri., April 6, 2018

Scott Pruitt is way more fucked up than we thought, Trump wants MORE tariffs, and Peggy Noonan misses good negros. Your morning news brief.

Rex Tillerson Burned Down Deep State, Also State Department

Because what the State Department needs is an army of MBAsplainers!

If Donald Trump Was Your Dad, You’d Have Taken Him To The Neurologist By Now

THE EMPEROR HAS NO CLOTHES! AND IS FUCKING INSANE!

Build The Wall Out Of Soldiers! Wonkagenda For Wed., April 4, 2018

Trump wants to build a border wall out of soldiers, Scott Walker is screaming BLUUUUUE WAAAAVE, and Robert Mueller has some questions. Your morning news brief.

Shitmouth Strikes Again. Wonkagenda For Fri., March 30, 2018

Trump rally too rambly even for Fox, Robert Mueller starts digging deeper, and Oklahoma raises taxes for teachers. MORE STRIKES EVERYONE! Your morning news brief.

Want Trump To Hire You To Run The VA? Just Tell Him He’s Not Fat

It's like 'Medical Center' crossed with 'Being There.'

Trump Makes VA Great Again With ‘Girther’ Doc. Wonkagenda For Thurs., March 29, 2018

Trump's doctor to lead the VA, Laura Ingraham is being a stupid mean girl on Twitter, and more about DJTJ and his dick. Your morning news brief.