Legal

That guy is such a jerk

Supreme Court Will Deport Everybody Before Donald Trump Has A Chance, Sad!

The Supreme Court deadlocked in an immigration case, effectively killing off President Obama's 2014 executive action on immigration. Get ready for drunks to start trying to enforce the decision with crowbars.
Every word of this is a word.

Bundy Bunch Trial Starts With Life-Or-Death Demand To Allow Idiots To Wear Cowboy Boots

Strictly a bring-your-own-dildo affair. The Bundy brothers have each other.

Gay-Hatin’ Alabama Chief Justice Reckons He Could Use Some Civil Rights Right About Now

Don't you all know Roy Moore is being persecuted by the homosexuals, which is unfair and not at all Christlike?

Federal Judge Gives Mississippi Clerks And Bigots A Real Bad Week

Sometimes, when there is a ton of news about a couple-a big things, news about other things gets swept under the rug and we miss it! But in addition to the other awesome judicial news we got on Monday --...
Judge Vance Day, looking thoughtful in his official portrait

Oregon Judge Won’t Marry No Gays, But Look At His Rad Picture Of Hitler

While Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis and her lunatic fans hog the media spotlight with their wacky antics, an Oregon judge, the Hon. Vance Day of Marion County, has been quietly refusing to perform weddings for same-sex couples, initially telling...
Why yes, we are mocking his abuse at the hands of a tyrannical federal government.

Who Are Oregon’s Wildlife Sanctuary Occupiers And What Do They Want?

Now that the news is infected with Bundys again, let's take a few minutes to bring you up to speed on some basics of this latest Armed Militia Patriot Idiocy Outbreak, in which an unknown number of morons with...
Oh, there's good stuff in here.

Wonkagenda: Thursday, September 22, 2016

You get in here and read your news brief, RIGHT NOW!
Oh, it's this asshole again

Evil Dumb Maine Gov. Paul LePage Would Love To See Heads Roll In Public Square

Maine's functionally illiterate idiot Gov. Paul LePage flapped his face hole again, and that never works out well for him. Earlier this month, he was sorry not sorry OK maybe a little sorry but not really for saying "guys by the name D-Money, Smoothie,...

Remember When Hillary Clinton Almost Went To Jail Because She Fired Her Travel Agent?

You have sort of heard of 'Travelgate,' and how Hillary Clinton is the worst crimer since Bonnie AND Clyde. But what is it? Let's remember together!

Houston Daycare Worker Fired Just For Being Bigoted Jerk To 6-Year-Old

It's a real shame Houston just voted against an ordinance to protect people from being fired just for bein' who they are, innit? This poor lady, Madeline Kirksey, says she was unfairly and illegally fired from the Children’s Lighthouse Learning Center in...
I suppose now Adam Sandler wants a White House invitation, too?

BREAKING: Nerd Hero Teen Didn’t Whittle His Clock From Scratch, Send Him To Gitmo!

The Wingnuttosphere has spent a fair chunk of the weekend getting very exercised about a post from a weekly Buffalo newspaper Thursday that "exposed" -- with the breathless excitement of the best investigative journalism -- the True Facts about...
Something something tongue-punch your fartbox

Horny Family Values Teabaggers Tossed From Michigan Legislature, Oh How Sad

Our long national nightmare/jokefest is at last over. Michigan state Reps. Todd Courser and Cindy Gamrat have lost their jobs. Courser resigned, and Gamrat was expelled by her peers in the state House. The two family-values conservatives, both of whom were...

SCOTUS Is Your Unlikely Gun Control Hero Of The Week

Guns and Muslims. Muslims and guns. Pretty much all we get to write about these days, thanks to a near-inexhaustible supply of racist pants-crapping rhetoric from this year's dismal crop of GOP candidates. And let's face it: literally all...

Ben Shapiro Forgets To Pretend Texas’s Bad Abortion Law Was About Women’s Health

The anti-choice cat comes out of the bag for this Monday Cringefest.