Evan Hurst

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Evan Hurst is the Senior Editor of Wonkette. He spends his days deflecting the sad glances of his black lab, Lula, who would please like him to stop typing letters to the internet and throw the squeaky chicken in the backyard instead. Though the internet does not give him credit, it's probably his fault Aaron Schock is no longer a congressperson, due how Evan would not stay off his tail during the SCANDALS. (Not in a sex way, in a writing way!) Also, he writes songs and plays the piano, at the same time! Lastly, Evan is a Southern person, and thus is casting polite judgment on you, right now, for reading this. Bless your heart.

Your Weekly Ten Is NOT Gonna Let That Fucker Trump Ruin Christmas

YOU COME READ YOUR TOP STORIES RIGHT NOW!

Hero Alabama Dad Who Lost Gay Daughter Went On Ellen To Make You Laugh And Cry And SHUT UP YOU ARE

Here. Have a happy post. They are in such short supply these days.

THIS IS SERIOUS. Rep. Adam Schiff Just Hit The ‘OH FUCK!’ Button

STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING AND READ THIS RIGHT THE FUCK NOW.
Sad Ann Coulter is sad

Can Someone Please Call Ann Coulter On The Telephone?

Is Ann Coulter having a crisis? Does she need a friend?

WHO’S LEAKING THE SEXTS? WHO’S LEAKING THE SEXTS? Oh, It’s Just The Trump Justice Department Again

We are officially bored with this STUPID FUCKING STORY.

Mike Huckabee So Mad Fired Mueller FBI Guy Did LITERAL COUP To Trump, By Sexting

This is definitely a thing that happened.

Washington Post Says Trump’s Hard-On For Russia Has Fucked America BIGLY

Thanks, Trump! You're just as bad as we thought you'd be, and worse!

‘Morning Joe’ And Hyper-Feminist Mike Huckabee Having BIG FIGHT, And We Are HERE FOR IT

Mike Huckabee just wishes Mika Brzezinski would stop sexisting his perfect and honest daughter Sarah, by asking her to tell the truth and stuff.

Roy Moore Waiting For God To Certify Doug Jones Winner Of Alabama Election

WHERE'S YOUR GOD NOW, ROY? Oh, He's just over there wearing a Doug Jones T-shirt!

Look At These Fucking GOP Idiots Begging Trump To Fire Robert Mueller

How Rep. Jim Jordan and Rep. Louie Gohmert manage to put on pants each day without gravely injuring themselves is beyond us.

Fired Robert Mueller Investigator Thinks Trump Is Fuckin’ Idiot, Like All Patriotic Americans

Just like the Secretary of State, the National Security Adviser, and a supermajority of the American people!

RIP STEVE BANNON’S MENTIONS!

All of GOP Washington is telling Steve Bannon to fuck off. Is this hilarious, or is it TOTALLY HILARIOUS?

… And The Fucking Horse Roy Moore Rode In On

Your one-stop shop for Alabama election results! (OR IS IT?)

This Alabama Dad Is The Hero We Wish We Didn’t Need

Listen to this man right now.

Roy Moore Went To An Underage Brothel And Didn’t Even Fuck Kids A Little Bit (ALLEGEDLY)

Don't you want to vote for Roy Moore now?