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Ben Franklin is judging you

We thought about canceling on yinz … wait, that is Pittsburgh. We thought about canceling on tu ustedes, but what is a little nor’easter between friends?

We will see you TONIGHT, Brooklyn, New York, at your comrade Erin’s restaurant Grindhaus, 275 Van Brunt St., Red Hook, Brooklyn, we will call it 7-9 p.m. and NO LATER because apparently we have to take a ferry home. (Food is on us, your drinks are on you!)

FRIDAY! Pizza party at Pi Pizzeria, 910 F Street NW, Washington, DC 20004, 202.393.5484. Pizza and beer are on me! 6-8 p.m.!

And here is the plan for Saturday morning:

We will meet outside Rosa Mexicano, 575 Seventh St. NW, across the street from the Gallery Place Chinatown Metro Station. We (or you!) will be waiting there from 10:30 a.m. to 12:15, because — and this is important — last time we were an hour late to our own meeting spot because it took 90 minutes to get out of the subway. We’re not mad — getting out of the subway was one of the funnest, most energetic parts of the 2017 Women’s March — we are just saying, there will be a whole block of time when we might be late, or you might be late, or all of us might be late together. So instead of leaving without each other, we will all wait quite a while. GOT IT? GOOD! :D

NOW! For your Philadelphia party pix! The original plan was to march on Drinking Liberally and invade their party by aggressively BUYING THEM BEER. But they canceled for weather. Did YOUR WONKETTE NATION cancel for weather? THEY FUCKING DID NOT. About a dozen showed up from many miles away — IN WEATHER — to eat and drink and bring us presents. Let’s look at them!

And for the rest of our Get Your Guns Off My Lawn 2018 Tour? Well, it’s mostly not scheduled yet. But we’ll get there!

Baltimore, Maryland! Holy Frijoles, 4 to 7 p.m.! Sun., March 25.

Morgantown, West Virginia! Let us wipe off the coal dust and kiss you on your FED UP faces! Mon., March 26. And then …

Lexington, Kentucky!

Definitely Indianapolis!

Looks like Kansas City!

And then Denver!

Maybe Wyoming? We got anyone in Wyoming? One guy has emailed me “I live in Wyoming.” Okay we love you bye.

Thank you for the ass, gas, and grass. And also for supporting Wonkette, which runs SOLELY on donations from YOU.

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