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Hooray! Congress just dropped more episodes in the long-running drama series, HOW DARE YOU CATCH ME COMMITTING ALL THESE CRIMES! This week, Senators Chuck Grassley and Lindsey Graham are calling out Susan Rice, who is notorious for being female and professional and black. Egads!

If you liked the “Unmasking” story arc where they raked Rice over the coals for trying to figure out which Trump team official was whispering with the Russian ambassador to get sanctions lifted, you’ll LOVE the new season. Plot twist: This time they’ll be screaming because Rice didn’t tell Trump associates that they were under investigation!

The Senators are flogging an email which Susan Rice sent to herself on January 20, 2017, the day of Trump’s inauguration. Almost like Rice was deliberately leaving a permanent record which could never be deleted! The email details a meeting on January 5 where James Comey, Sally Yates, and Rice herself briefed Obama and Vice President Biden on the Steele Dossier and the investigation into Trumpland’s various Russian entanglements. Or as Chuck and Lindsey put it,

It strikes us as odd that, among your activities in the final moments on the final day of the Obama administration, you would feel the need to send yourself such an unusual email purporting to document a conversation involving President Obama and his interactions with the FBI regarding the Trump/Russia investigation.

Why yes, it was ODD! But not half as odd as handing the National Security Advisor portfolio off to Michael Flynn knowing that he’d been picked up having clandestine negotiations with the Russian Ambassador on multiple occasions and then lied about it to the press. Odd is knowing that routine opposition research has kicked up evidence of money laundering, financial entanglements with a foreign power, and susceptibility to blackmail by the incoming POTUS.

Gosh, why wouldn’t the outgoing administration want to share classified information on Russia with people who were having backchannel communications with the Russian ambassador every other day? SO WEIRD! Unfortunately, that doesn’t fit with Senator Cornhole’s narrative that it is ILLEGAL to investigate your political opponent when he is committing a crime.

Rice continued in her email to Rice,

The President stressed that he is not asking about, initiating or instructing anything from a law enforcement perspective. He reiterated that our law enforcement team needs to proceed as it normally would by the book.

From a national security perspective, however, President Obama said he wants to be sure that, as we engage with the incoming team, we are mindful to ascertain if there is any reason that we cannot share information fully as it relates to Russia.

Sure he said they should do everything “by the book.” But what if Obama actually meant something else entirely! Lucky thing Grassley and Graham have an active fantasy life and can bring themselves to corngasm just by imagining Barack Obama doing something dirrrrrty.

And then there was a big old redacted section.

So, who might be behind that door? Could it be Michael “Lock Her Up” Flynn, the guy who recently pleaded guilty to lying to the FBI? The one Barack Obama explicitly warned Donald Trump was a security risk? The one who Sally Yates told Don McGahn repeatedly had been compromised by making false statements to the FBI? The one who plotted with the Turks to kidnap a 75-year-old cleric from Pennsylvania and black helicopter him out of the country?

Ayup! Per WaPo,

On Jan. 5, FBI Director James B. Comey, CIA Director John Brennan and Director of National Intelligence James R. Clapper Jr. briefed Obama and a small group of his top White House advisers on the contents of a classified intelligence report showing that Russia intervened in the 2016 election to help Trump. That’s when White House officials learned that the FBI was investigating the Flynn-Kislyak calls. “The Flynn-Kislyak relationship was highlighted,” a former senior U.S. official said, adding that the bureau made clear “that there was an actual investigation” underway.

Senators Graham and Grassley are mad that the White House didn’t want to tell Michael Flynn the details of an investigation into … Michael Flynn. So now these paragons of integrity have some questions for the little lady.

For one thing, they want to know if she drafted that email all by herself. And did she also think of it all on her own? Because they are giant, flaming misogynist dicks.

Did anyone instruct, request, suggest, or imply that you should send yourself the aforementioned Inauguration Day email memorializing President Obama’ s meeting with Mr. Corney about the Trump/Russia investigation? If so, who and why?

Then they had one million questions about the Steele Dossier and warrants on Carter Page. Which are, naturally, ILLEGAL because after investigating Trump’s one million money laundering schemes, Chris Steele didn’t like Donald Trump. Gotta say, this show may have jumped the shark. It’s like they’re just recycling material from last year and hoping we won’t notice.

Anyway, tune in next week to find out if the good senators finally prove once and for all that there is NO RUSSIA only DEEP STATE OBAMA meddling and FRUIT OF THE POISON TREE!!!!

(Spoiler Alert: No, they won’t.)

Follow your FDF on Twitter.


Please money us! We are not The Deep State!

[Grassley Ltr and Rice email / WaPo / Politico]

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  • Shrieking Harpy

    They’re cranking up the OUTRAGE machine.

  • BadKitty904

    Fuck those two guys.

  • Villago Delenda Est

    Both of them need to join Betsy DeVos on that ice floe.

  • TJ Barke

    How dare you try to catch suspected criminals performing criminal acts without warning them first!?

  • La forza del resistino

    Chuckster and Lindsey should be the last 2 people to comment on anything ‘odd and unusual’.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      Isn’t ‘Odd and Unusual’ the name of their comedy double act?

      • La forza del resistino

        Yes, the jokes just write themselves.

        • Marion in Savannah

          But, being Republicans, the jokes just ain’t funny.

          • La forza del resistino

            gallows humor is all we have left for now.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    I think Grassley is a few fried butter sticks short of a State Fair.

    He was always a dope, but his fervent desire to service Trump has done terrible things to his mind.

  • Villago Delenda Est

    These dweebs also can’t get cause and effect straight. Steele’s attitude on Donald was formed after he sussed out all the collusion. He didn’t go into this looking for shit on Donald, the shit slapped him in the face.

    • This should mean the shit should be slapping Mueller in the face, harder since he has the investigative dream team.

      No wonder trumps scared.

      • GoutMachine

        I feel like we’re overdue an indictment.

        • Like that guy said that time in that movie.

          Rest Neo, the answers are coming.

          • Snowbound Ron

            /me checks his watch impatiently.

          • May I suggest a timepiece on a gold chain, and a monocle?

          • Snowbound Ron

            Got a 1923 Waltham on a chain, but I need to get my monocle prescription updated. Busy, busy, busy.

          • Style, you either got it or…

  • arglebargle

    At least they didn’t accuse Rice of being uppity. On record anyway.

    • GoutMachine

      Pretty sure it was implied.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “What’s said in the cloak room, stays in the cloak room. I hope.”
      — Lindsey Graham

    • I still have trouble believing that word was used as a definition of behaviour, so much racism is hard to take in.

      To see that it’s implied now in the halls of American government, it’s 2018 for fucks sake.

      It is 2018 yes? I feel like I’ve skipped a year somewhere.

      • Amazing Professional Lunatic

        Maybe the year 1952-2018? That was a very good year, indeed.

  • GoutMachine

    I’m trying to balance between “God, these guys are idiots” and “God, these guys are so blatantly covering Trump’s (their?) asses” … I’m sure it’s some combination of the two. Might need a Venn diagram.

    • arglebargle
      • Ghenghis McCann

        ‘Its spelled “Morans”.’

      • Latverian Diplomat

        Among other things, this diagram explains why undesirable alien Justin Bieber has not been deported.

        • GoutMachine

          I also didn’t realize Trump was a Belieber. Figured him for more of a Nickelback guy.

          • Latverian Diplomat

            It gives him and Ivanka something to talk about.

        • Arolpin

          He recently bought a house in the next town over, and his ‘spiritual advisor’ lives in my town, so he’s around on occasion. I find out about it when my kids text me or someone reports it on our town facebook page (more of an ‘avoid this street, because Justin Bieber is signing autographs’ than a ‘Bieber is HERE’ post).
          I can’t figure out how he has stayed semi-relevant for as long as he has, but at a middle-school sports even last week there were several moms of the opposing team in full Belieber gear: Sweatpants, t-shirts, sweatshirts, and hats, so there must be some adults out there supporting him.
          I get that he’s an entitled asshole, and his music is certainly pop pablum at best, but he appears to be trying to grow up, and at his worst, he’s like 1% as odious as the least odious person in the Trump White House, so I’ve decided to just ignore him rather than hate on him. (Plus he saw a classmate of the Arol-twins busking at a Starbucks, joined in with her on a song, and then introduced her and her parents to folks in the music biz to help her career. The dad said it appeared that he was genuinely impressed with her skills and wanted to help out.)

        • Amazing Professional Lunatic

          Bieber’s done got religion, now, so he’s gone from undesirable to deplorable. You know, one of the good guys.

      • Lance Thrustwell

        I know a good diagram Venn I see one!

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Could these two just go back to the primary concerns of their constituents, ethanol, racism, and also racism?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Well, Susan Rice does have a high melanin count, therefore is an uppity ho, so they think they’re good.

  • Hmm, FDF…. it’s almost like your trying to tell us something is afoot with the trump administration and corruption involving the Russian government and its diplomats.

    Also, I must commend you on the “Jumped the Shark” bit, that’s something I’ve never heard before, you’d better believe I’m stealing it tho.

    Well actually I’m going to make a donation here on payday, just for the shark bit.

    Seriously, that senator looks like a corpse/mummy/vampire. I assume he needs regular blood transfusions just to continue to harass actual honest government employees.

    Somebody drag him into the sunlight, that will settle things good and proper.

  • Scooby

    I have to admit that seeing Trump and book in the same sentence is a bit disconcerting.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “I’m a best selling author, the greatest. Also, Harry Potter was my idea, stolen from me!”
      — Donald Trump

      • Snowbound Ron

        ‘Moveable type? Mine. That Kraut stole the idea. Weak!’

    • Ghenghis McCann

      Trump and ‘Book him’ would be quite acceptable.

      • Marion in Savannah

        Would be a dream come true.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Dano, get on that!

  • TheGrandWazoo2

    Grassley and Graham should be sued by Simple Minds for trademark infringement.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      And don’t you forget it!

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Isn’t there a “used without the irony” exception for infringement?

    • Ghenghis McCann

      Slightly OTT, but Simple Minds were originally called Johnny and the Self-abusers. Grassley and Graham appear to be a couple of wankers.

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Remember way back in Ye Olde Thymes when our good friend France didn’t want to join us in Iraq because they rightly felt it was gonna be a major cockup? We had Freedom Fries and French wine running in the gutters. Today? Russia hacks our election. Meh. What are you gonna do? Boys will be boys.

    • TJ Barke

      The prime difference being that Russia helped the republicans.

      • Marion in Savannah

        Bingo!

      • 1943hduff

        Dead on. Imagine the screaming from Trump and the GOP if the Russians were helping the Democrats. That is why they do nothing the Russian’s are keeping them in power.

    • dslindc

      I could really go for some wine and fries right about now, also too.

    • Tim Berland

      Let’s have some freedom borscht and pour vodka down the drain.

  • Cousin Itt, hoi polloi

    You find it odd? Listen if you were a real Odd Fellow you would “Visit the sick, relieve the distressed, bury the dead and educate the orphan”.

    Now, fuck off.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Independent_Order_of_Odd_Fellows

    • Querolous

      My dad and his brother and sister were raised in a IOOF orphanage in Illinois. I went with him to a 50 year reunion. It was like finding dozens of aunts and uncles. Good people.

  • YouInDangerGirl!

    Y’all ever wonder if some of these shenanigans are a covert way for concerned-yet-closeted Republicans (no offense, Lindsey) to actually feed the Russia fire? Or is it that they truly don’t realize their fire extinguishers are filled with gasoline?

    • Marion in Savannah

      The latter.

      • YouInDangerGirl!

        A cleansing conflagration, either way. I do hope Grassley and Graham’s vaudeville act hits the big time (in the big house).

  • SayItWithWookies

    So the Obama administration knew on January 5th that Mike Flynn was being investigated for Russia ties — and may have known before that. And the Assmouth administration was warned sometime around then as well, but definitely before the inauguration? And for some reason Susan Rice wanted to note that for future reference in case it became forgotten after a spell, and someone tried to deny all knowledge that Flynn was an actual foreign agent? Yeah, Chuck Grassley — that’s suspicious as hell.

    And what was the title of that memo? Oh yeah — “Bin Laden Determined to Strike Inside United States.” See — one administration learned that when you’re warned about a threat, you should do something.

  • Ryan Denniston

    I fail to see the connection to Hillary’s email server management practices. Can someone clue me in?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Reasons.

    • janecita

      Things and stuff man, things and stuff.

    • Amazing Professional Lunatic

      It’s obvious to me. Susan Rice sent an EMAIL! Hillary is the ringleader of the DEEP STATE. Therefore Benghazi!!!1!!!111!!

  • Mr. Blobfish

    We can figure out what the Russians are blackmailing 62-year-old bachelor with. What do they have on Grassley? Is there corn in his cornhole?

    • Antonin Dvorak

      It is probably as simple as a lot of illegal/ suspect donations.

      • Snowbound Ron

        So, all of the donations.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Probably he treated some blah woman with dignity and respect once, and that’s what they’ve got on him.

      • Resistor Radio

        Ew, I did NOT need to know that Grassley named his peen “Dignity and Respect”

    • SayItWithWookies

      Neigh.

    • janecita

      There is a famous Spanish poem by Federico García Lorca that contains this line, “Poderoso caballero es Don Dinero.” It means Mr. Money is a powerful gentleman. All these assholes are up to their eyeballs in Russian money.

      • proudgrampa

        Every damned one of them.

    • (((Secret Agent Sedagive)))

      Maize in his maze?

    • Celtic_Gnome

      It’s probably the money. Citizens United allowed Republicans to accumulate vast amounts of money from questionable sources. As they say, “Behind every great fortune is a crime.”

  • Meccalopolis

    this should go about as well as their other attempts to blow smoke

    • cmd resistor

      Of course, for wingnuts, all you have to do is say the name Susan Rice and heads explode. Almost as good as “Hillary” or “Obama.”

  • Spotts1701, Porg Wrangler

    It strikes us as odd that, among your activities in the final moments on the final day of the Obama administration, you would feel the need to send yourself such an unusual email purporting to document a conversation involving President Obama and his interactions with the FBI regarding the Trump/Russia investigation.

    It’s odd that Susan Rice made written notes of a conversation she had with the President, and then e-mailed those comments to herself and others so as to have a written record?

    Grassley’s an idiot, but Graham worked in a JAG office. He knows how contemporaneous notes work.

    • Meccalopolis

      She’s trying to make sure there is a record of it, do you really want to know why?

    • Marion in Savannah

      Anything to muddy the waters.

    • Nenatopia

      The audience they’re playing to doesn’t know from contemporaneous notes, though. They’re trying to deflect blame onto Democrats, and if misleading the public regarding Susan Rice’s intentions helps that narrative, that’s what they’ll do.

    • SweetDeeKat

      I email myself all the time with documents I don’t want to lose. My office could asplode, but the internet goes forever.

      • 1943hduff

        Same here. For that stuff I trust Gmail for securing my data more than i trust my 7 year old laptop. Documents, photos, contacts and memo to self “get milk on way home”

    • Resistance Ftr PuckStopsHere

      Mebbe Ms. Lindsay wasn’t good at her JAG job. She ain’t worth a spit in Senate.

  • janecita

    I think that Republicans don’t want to do shit about the Russian interference in our elections because November isn’t that far away. Their goal is to win again with Russian help.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Just like they did in 2016.

      • janecita

        They have to cheat to win. It’s the Republican way.

        • Hobbes’ like, smart Evil Twin

          Well, you don’t expect them to win on their “ideas” do you?

    • data_ninja

      That’s been my guess at this point too, knowing the blue wave is coming.

    • VirginiaHighFiber

      Or the election results will be called invalid because of Russian interference. But only if it’s a win for the blues situation.

  • calliecallie

    Grassley and Graham are the new Beavis and Butthead.

  • Beelzebubba

    Why don’t these goobers just email their bullshit directly to Hannity, and spare us the odor?

  • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

    Near the end of the Steele dossier saga, Steele backed off from dealing with the FBI and U.S. officialdom generally, because he believed they were hopelessly corrupted by partisan stupidity and incompetent besides.

    Given this Keystone Cops-grade witch hunt, I can’t really say he was wrong.

  • kaydenpat

    This is why I can’t stand Graham. He knows very well how corrupt and racist Trump is but still plays the fool to defend him.

    • BreakingDeadMen

      He is complicit in the Russian money game.

    • VirginiaHighFiber

      She’s a pro at denying the obvious.

  • La forza del resistino

    On TV, Senate intel committee grilling dept heads,while Rubio spent 10 minutes serving up slurpy softballs, Ron Wyden was sharpening his nails. Ouch.

  • (((Secret Agent Sedagive)))

    I’m too busy doing emotional triage from the assault on our environment (guess what kids – no more environmental impact reviews! Ryan Zinke can ok a pipeline that bulldozes through the wilderness all by himself!) to follow the ridiculous narrative nitpickings going on in DC.

    Vote, vote, like an angry, fed-up, not-going-to-take-this-shit-anymore, rabidly-revolutionary baby stoat!

  • proudgrampa

    Oh, hell. As a consultant, I sent emails to myself all the time. It was a record of things that I thought were important.

    Nobody else would have read them, anyway.

    • gnomemansanisland

      I do it too. Just a way to take notes. When I’m not non-commenting here.

    • Cousin Itt, hoi polloi

      So, you’re a Deep State Grampa?

      Those are the worstest.

      • proudgrampa

        Indeed!

    • Ghenghis McCann

      You young folk. When I was a lad, all I could do was talk to myself and I was lucky if I replied. Don’t know how easy you have it.. grumble, grumble.

    • SeriousSummer

      I send them to myself. Then I reply, disagreeing. No way they’ll pin anything on me–even though they follow me everywhere and they’ve bugged my microwave.

    • Erala Contratista

      I just learned how to email myself. The engineer who showed me did not fall over laughing when I asked how come my email wouldn’t crash into my other emails, going the wrong way and all….

  • WiscoJoe

    In related news (allegedly!) DNI Dan Coats just released this interesting statement about Russian ratfucking:

    “At a minimum, we expect Russia to continue using propaganda, social media, false-flag personas, sympathetic spokespeople, and other means of influence to try to exacerbate social and political fissures in the United States.”

    • Marion in Savannah

      No shit. Who’da thunk it?

      • Rick Hill

        You go with what works….especially if it works because the people tasked with policing this sort of thing are the ones you get elected to office

      • WiscoJoe

        Certainly not these sympathetic spokespeople in the Senate!

    • Magma Cardhole jesterpunk

      Funny, now even Nunes is setting up propaganda social media sites using campaign donations.

    • gnomemansanisland

      Sounds like an endorsement.

      • WiscoJoe

        Good thing that not following through on punitive sanctions is acting as a deterrent. Or something. Still haven’t figured out how that one is supposed to work.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      “And given that a congressman’s ear and advocacy can be bought for under a million dollars, or in rich people terms, ‘pocket change,’ we expect this will be happening rather a lot.”

    • Flashman

      That’s a minimum. The maximum is, we will rename Congress “the Duma”, and Putin will appoint our representatives directly.

  • Rick Hill

    So, now, at least, we are raising the level of discourse from childish, schoolyard taunting to “They would have got away with it if it weren’t for you meddling kids!”
    Thank you for being the grownups in the room, gop.

  • James Baskin

    The age of Aquarius is officially dead.

    • Cousin Itt, hoi polloi

      Your non-comment actually gave me pause.

      What is the new ethos of hope and joy?

      “It’s dead, Jim.”

    • Querolous

      The International Astronomical Union (IAU) provides a much more solid answer to the debate. The IAU standardized the names, shapes, and – most importantly – the borders between the 88 modern constellations in 1930. This gives a defined border between Pisces and Aquarius – a line from the celestial coordinates 23h 56m 24s, -3.304° to 22h 51m 27s, -3.337° . The point of the vernal equinox should cross this line around the year 2600. By the IAU’s reckoning we aren’t there yet.https://owlcation.com/stem/What-is-the-age-of-Aquarius

  • Resistance Ftr PuckStopsHere

    So. let me see if I’ve got this straight: You’re saying the people of Iowa, confronted with the choice of literally any Iowan and not under duress of any kind, selected “presume deer ded” here and ‘I’m wearing plastic bread wrappers on my feet,” as their representatives in “The World’s Greatest Deliberative Body”? Fuck Iowa.

    • Scooby

      In shithole countries children have no shoes.

      • Nockular cavity

        Wonder Bread wrappers are status symbols there. Means you can afford the fancy stuff.

        • BreakingDeadMen

          “I cried because I had Wonder Bread shoes until I met a man who had store brand.”

    • SweetDeeKat

      You forgot Steve King. Although there is a concerted effort underway to unseat him.

      • Resistance Ftr PuckStopsHere

        In spite of a cognitive dissonance violent enough to rattle one’s teeth, the phrase “World’s Greatest Deliberative Body” continues to refer to the United States Senate. Senators actually believe this, too. They are not being sarcastic when they say it, leading me to believe that someday historians of the future will be able to pinpoint, to the day, the precise moment irony died.

        • SweetDeeKat

          Good lord, I thought that was a joke phrase that covered the whole legislative branch. I stand corrected.

  • BreakingDeadMen

    I don’t understand how this is supposed to be a win for them? This seems really damning to the Trump admin from a, you know, rational perspective.

    • Snowbound Ron

      Who might be applying said rational perspective? Certainly not the media.

  • BaconzShanz

    “Covering your ass and not looking complacent in potential illegal, and treasonous activities for a government official is odd”

    • Nasty Woman Persisted

      It is for a Republican.

  • Resistor Radio

    You guys – I just turned on the teevee, what is this hearing right now?

    • Magma Cardhole jesterpunk

      OT, good morning Resistor. 😀

      • Resistor Radio

        Good morning jesterpunk! *waves*

    • Snowbound Ron

      I’ve been trying to figure that out myself. There seems to be one informative word per statement, but I can’t suss out which one that is.

    • IMPOed

      To “investigate” the malfeasance of our Left wing intelligence community.

      • The usual, republicans trying to undermine Americans intelligence agencies to protect a president who may very well be a Russian operative.

        Same ol.

    • Nockular cavity

      The usual morning show trials.

      • Resistor Radio

        LOL!

      • Ghenghis McCann

        Is that ‘Morning Show’ trials, or morning show-trials? Is there a difference on Fox News?

        • Resistor Radio

          I read it as morning Show-Trials and was delighted.

          Ooo, Angus King getting mad

        • Nockular cavity

          Well you have to have the convictions and executions over in time for the afternoon show trials. Leader Trump has so many enemies to be purged!

    • cmd resistor

      All I know is FBI head guy testified on timeline of Porter background check. Maybe some regular oversight thing?

  • Mavenmaven

    One starts to wonder what kompromat there must be on Grassley, though I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t want to watch it

  • Shrieking Harpy

    Does anyone else here remember being taught that honesty and integrity as well as intelligence were virtues? Or am I just being a middle-aged crank?

    • gnomemansanisland

      Way back in the misty distant past I remember something. It’s lost now.

      • SDGeoff3

        They say memory is the second thing to go; and I can’t remember the first…

        • You should ice that burn

          Blue steel erections.

          • SDGeoff3

            Oh yeah…those.

    • Wonky “TurnipShepherd” McGoo

      this is one of the many thoughts that runs through my own head as i stare slackjawed into the distance, trying to make sense of this moment in time.

      • Shrieking Harpy

        I have childhood memories of my father getting angry every time he watched the nightly news, and now I’m turning into him.

        • IMPOed

          I was reminded of that the other day, OH NOOOOO!!

        • I have a friend who felt compelled to rein in her daughter’s behavior, even though she felt sympathetic to her, and remembers going through it herself. She said she realized to her horror that she had become her mother and her daughter simultaneously.

    • Magma Cardhole jesterpunk

      I do, it might be why I am not a Republican and can’t get in on the wing nut welfare train.

    • Nockular cavity

      Ironically, I was taught those values by people who ended up being trained by Fox News into believing any crap spewed by mendacious, two-faced dolts if it was screamed loud enough and had fancy graphics. *Sigh*

    • IMPOed

      Obviously a Left wing conspiracy to undermine our overlord money whores!

    • Cousin Itt, hoi polloi

      Say what you will but as a kid growing up in the suburban Kansas City schools in the 1960s/70s, I had the best teachers and best education. And without any reference to an all powerful sky god.

    • I remember having to teach myself those values.

      It’s been a long road and families are sometimes asshats.

  • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

    Q: “Did anyone instruct, request, suggest, or imply that you should send yourself the aforementioned Inauguration Day email memorializing President Obama’ s meeting with Mr. Corney about the Trump/Russia investigation? If so, who and why?”

    A: “Yes, Jesus told me to do it because he loves homosexuals!”

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Aren’t there more important things to be investigating, like Uranium One?

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      Or Benghazi emails?

      • rocktonsam

        Libelz libelz

    • Magma Cardhole jesterpunk

      They could investigate why kirsten gillibrand didn’t stop Bill and how she was involved.

    • Wonky “TurnipShepherd” McGoo

      what about that pizza place?

      • Ping pong something?

        Magic basement door 🚪?

        • Tim Berland

          Magic basement.

          • I stand corrected.

            Where can u get one of these magical basements btw?

            We don’t have actual real basements in Australia so it might increase my standing in the community.

  • MynameisBlarney

    Doggo memes because, holy fuckin shit everything fucking sucks right now.

    http://cheezburger.com/4792837/40-delightful-doggo-memes-to-brighten-your-day

    • Not everything Blarney.

      There’s still trees 🌲

      • Ghenghis McCann

        They suck up Carbon Dioxide and produce Oxygen. That’s why Trump and the Republicans hate them.

        • Yeah well, I have several hundred thousand of them on my property atm, and they all hate trump and the republicans back.

          Most nontree/humans do too, so it’s not all bad.

    • Erala Contratista

      Thanks! No longer have doggos, but those all act just like ours did.

      :-D

  • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

    I would like to add, can we all appreciate the willpower of former Obama administration officials? Because were this me being dragged in front of a committee to answer the disingenuous questions of elderly borderline-treasonous dickbags trying to cover for their halfwit of a boss, I’m pretty sure they’d have to redact the shit out of *my* transcript.

    • I’d appreciate them more if they could bring down the current corrupt administration.

      America is going to have to have another election me thinks, after the impeachment’s and the disbanding of the Russian republicans in Congress for gross corruption and dereliction of duty.

      Don’t forget to vote guys.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      My testimony would include a bunch of references to “you fucking dishonest, traitorous fucks”

    • Tim Berland

      Here is the willpower I appreciate: they are being accused of high crimes and misdemeanors and they just keep their mouths shut, rope-a-dope, and take the abuse. I know of some people (Trump) who could not refrain from responding to each and every insult.

  • Snowbound Ron

    OT but of note:
    Can’t see who’s who on the telly right now (as usual, the housemate is sleeping through CNN) but I just heard someone – a Dem, I assume – shout out, we KNOW the Russians are attacking our computers and fucking with our elections, WHY ARE WE DOING NOTHING ABOUT IT?
    Good question, Senator. I’d love to hear the answer. (That’s right, nobody had an answer.)

  • Flashman

    #releasetheredactedparagraph.

  • Azazael

    Has anybody come across the brain trusts that seem to think Mueller is going to jail? I just did and I must say, my brain hurts after that. Where are they getting this nonsense? Ugh, it’s like somehow their brains have been retired to believe the craziest shite.

    • Amazing Professional Lunatic

      Probably Bleitfart. I’m not gonna go verify my suspicions, though.

  • Douglas White

    I only hope that Rice testifies openly and says something like:

    ” I decided, on my own, to send that e-mail to myself, as a way of putting into the permanent record what had occurred and what steps had been taken by myself and other members of the Obama Administration. Why? because I knew that the incoming administration was full of people who would happily lie to the American public about what had transpired, would make false accusations about the members of the Obama administration, and would do literally anything in their power to cover up their corruption and illegal behavior. I also took it for granted that Republican members of Congress would line up behind the incoming Trump administration in these efforts, even if they explicitly knew that what they were claiming was false…. even if they knew that the allegations against the Obama administration were false, and even if they knew they were participating in a cover-up of criminal activity by the incoming Trump administration. turns out I was pretty good at predicting the future, huh?”

    • Just out of curiosity, what’s stopping her from saying all those things?

      It is all true after all, and the whole fucking world knows it.

      I’d say it, no worries. Probably much more if I had the proof.

      • Monica

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    • Meccalopolis

      Brava

  • Me not sure

    Little known fact: Grassley was beaten by a turnip on an episode of “Vegetable Jeopardy”.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5ae5ab1d01ef3ac6ddf72db2ca5470221da8f403565c1f8b5945a0615500d6d9.jpg

    • There’s something I never thought I’d hear.

      • Me not sure

        The turnip was quick on the buzzer.

    • khanurik

      That reminds me of an episode of Celebrity Jeopardy in which Maria Bartiromo participated(?). It was possibly the worst performance of any celebrity on this series. I remember thinking to myself at the time: “she’s dumber than a post.” However, thanks to you, I can now just picture Alex telling me (in his sometimes haughty way): “no, the correct answer is: dumber than a turnip.” Thank you for clearing that up…

      • Me not sure

        Turnip rolled through six Republican Senators before he was beaten by a radish.

    • Doug Langley

      If that don’t beet all.

  • fawkedifiknow

    “…. FRUIT OF THE POISON TREE!!!!”

    If you think about it at all, the above is a pretty accurate description of Senator Graham, I would say.

    • Blanche de Shambles

      “Fruit of the poison tree? Why how deah you, sah! For ah am a lovely South Carolina magnolia tree, like those which bloom in the Spring around Lake Moultrie!”

  • BreakingDeadMen

    If the FSB had a sense of humor they would just upload the pee pee tape to Pornhub and see how long it would take for it to go viral.

    • khanurik

      Actually, I’m thinking it would take longer than you would think. Of course, I have no first-hand knowledge of this, but according to my sources, the pee-pee tape would have to get in line behind the massive oeuvre of Stormy Daniels videos on Pornhub. So, I’m guessing like 2025?

      • BreakingDeadMen

        The fetishistic aspect would make it leak sooner, I would guess

        • Pun intended?

          • BreakingDeadMen

            I have always supported the free flow of information

  • chiefkurtz

    I’m constantly emailing to myself because I can’t print from my work computer.

  • Stable Uniomist Raan

    Oh, yeah, because the FBI and CIA totally told Aldrich Ames they were investigating him.

  • Espadron
    • DainBramage

      Hackers need to interrupt the Fox & Fiends feed and play this for Donnie.

  • For Republicans, “by the book” is code for “hose the opposition by any means legal or illegal” so they figure it’s the same for Democrats.

  • cmd resistor

    Thanks for clearing this one up. I saw a few headlines while looking for info on some phone call that Trump had with Putin (which was only made public by USA after it happened and I think after Russia released info) and then some subsequent conversation between Putin and Abbas where Putin allegedly said he was passing along greetings from Trump and was authorized to speak for him. Can’t find much info on THAT story but the few ones on THIS were predominately on wingnut and FOX sites. Will keep looking on the Putin stuff.

    • Amazing Professional Lunatic

      Saw that on Raw Story this morning.

  • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

    It galls me that these fucksticks are pretending to be patriotic about this shit. Sure, sure, you love the troops and the flag and our democratic institutions while you sell your souls to the Taint and the Russians to try and get reelected. Fuck you republican party.

  • “Why did you send this email to yourself?”

    “To make it very slightly harder for the incoming Republican Administration to delete, since it wasn’t subject to mass deletion from RNC private servers, as was the case in the previous Republican Administration.”

    • cmd resistor

      She should have sent it to Hillary.

      • Amazing Professional Lunatic

        Queen of the Deep State!

    • Shawn Charniga

      Am I the only one who recalls reading that during the final days of the Obama Administration, his people were squirreling away allll sorts of interesting Trump/Russia information so it couldn’t be rounded up and deleted en masse?

      Because I’m pretty sure that’s legit. And if it is, it WILL get out sooner or later.

    • HarpyLibtart

      Not to mention which, that is pretty standard bureaucratic practice in general – I have to make notes about every interaction I have with ANYONE in relation to my case files and if I’m not in/near my office after a meeting, I’ll whip my notes into an email and send it to myself so I can log things when I get back to the office….
      Mostly because if I write the notes down I have to keep the actual physical paper, and I am not trying to file all that crap all the time.

  • DainBramage

    Makes you wonder what Trump and Putin have on Graham and Grassley.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      Live boy and dead girl, respectively…

      • like really RESISTLY GHERKINS!

        Fred and I hit a deer on hiway 136 south of Dyersville. After I pulled fender rubbing on tire we continued to farm. Assume deer dead

        Maybe that wasn’t a deer that Grassley and Fred ‘hit.’
        Likely everything in that tweet is a perverted corn sex euphemism.

  • BMW

    First Carter Page, now Michael Flynn…they are *really* sticking their necks out for the wrong people.

  • Gorillionaire

    I gotta say, it looks more and more like Old Man Grassley has his own “issues” with the Russians.

  • Poly_Ester

    Where on earth did the G&G boys find the Benghazi!!!!!!!!!!!!!! playbook?

    • JustDon’tSayCAPSLOCK!!!

      Well, the other G boy isn’t using it anymore.

  • It’s going to be interesting to watch the new legal defense strategy that says you cannot be investigated by someone who thinks you may have committed a crime.

    • Bitter Scribe

      Not to mention the one that says that after literally years of breaking Hillary Clinton’s chops over nothing at all, the Republicans are indignant that anyone may have looked into their collusion with America’s greatest enemy.

  • Susan Rice is one of Those People on top of being a vagina haver. That will give Miss Lindsey the vapors. with old Chuckles it’s always hard to tell if it’s the vapors or the Iowa moonshine.

  • Zyxomma

    This is O/T but typical of the New Cruelty: https://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2018/02/12/585130274/trump-administration-wants-to-decide-what-food-snap-recipients-will-get?utm

    The Trump maladministration wants to cut our EBT benefits down to NOTHING and instead send us a USDA “package.” Well, Trump and Friends, I NEVER eat meat, dairy, eggs, or anything else that is or comes from an animal. I find canned fruits and vegetables DISGUSTING, and would never eat them. I might, however, throw them at you when you continue to provoke me.

    • Someone in that interview this AM also noted that states are in no position to be a food purchaser, packager and distributor and would likely raise holy hell.

      If it ever saw the light of day.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      Trump claims they can get a good deal on food by buying in bulk. Can’t understand why he’d think that. The Republicans never thought bulk purchases of prescriptions medications would result in any discounts.

    • Enter Ranting

      Uh, the guy you couldn’t sell steaks and vodka to Americans has a plan to distribute food? Okay…

  • osceola

    But but but … when Obama says “by the book” he means the QURAN!!!

    You libtards didn’t know that did you?

  • Mike Steele

    Can you even imagine what it feels like when you’re tasked with turning over all the state secrets to a freaking SPY as part of the transition process? And to think…McConnell strong-armed Obama into keeping all this crap on the down-low, lest it appear too ‘political’! If the FBI had been a wee bit more forthcoming about Trump/Russia RIGHT BEFORE ELECTION DAY, perhaps Putin would not have been able to pull off his coup. BTW, watched a.m. session of SSIC hearings.Benedict Pompeo could not have been a bigger tool if he’d tried. Even when questioner was addressing someone else, he’d insert his $.02 and try to change the subject; it wasn’t even subtle.

  • Ray in VT

    It’s pretty terrible that the government can find out who is talking a foreign ambassador from a country during a time when that country’s activities surrounding actions that they were taking to interfere with our elections and when trifling things like what the American in question might be able to do regarding pesky things like sanctions, some done as a response to the election activities. I mean why would intelligence sources even want to know who was whispering sweet nothings in the Ambassador’s ear?

  • “Memorializing”? Are we sure that’s the word for which we are searching Senator dumbshit?

  • YaJagoff
    • sarafina

      I wonder if they have regular renditions of “Every Sperm is Sacred” there.

    • mt2099

      North Korea has a different Taepodong.

  • Ducksworthy

    Defending Michael Flynn because he can’t defend himself (because he is a filthy traitor).

  • Ghoti theLinguist

    “Notorious for being female and professional and black.” ‘Nuff said.

  • chronozoan

    When the tables are turned on these two watch both “men” claim they’re being persecuted. Not only are all bullies cowards at heart they are crybabies as well.

  • Celtic_Gnome

    These guys aren’t acting like good Republicans just following Reagan’s 11th Commandment (Thou shall not say anything bad about a fellow Republican). They are acting like they’ve been compromised by the Russians as well and are doing everything to cover their asses by not letting anything get out.

  • Petunia Cat

    “President Obama’ s meeting with Mr. Corney”.

    They call Comey Mr. Corney in the actual document. 😂😂🤣 🌽🌽🌽🌽 Ah, simple pleasures. I imagine Mr. Corney as being a corn version of Mr. Peanut. But goofier.

  • mt2099

    That photo caption comparing the Senior Senator from Iowa to the Wicked Witch of the West is an insult to the Wicked Witch of the West.

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