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Hurts Daily Caller’s feelings

It is Martin Luther King Day, which means white conservatives are hitting the streets to tell us MLK was a conservative and that this day of remembrance should not be politicized, because like did Dr. King even pay attention to politics? Pfffffffffft. The Daily Caller, which was started by white supremacist Tucker Carlson, is particularly upset with Rep. Maxine Waters, a known black lady, who made MLK Day all political and thus interrupted the Daily Caller’s white serenity, by sending these relatively uncontroversial tweets:

LAND SAKES OH MY STARS FETCH ME MY SMELLING SALTS ALL THE WHITE PEOPLE HAVE NOW DIED OF CONSUMPTION!

So anyway, what Waters said is just true. If King were alive today, he’d be leading the charge against the white supremacist neo-Nazi sympathizer in the White House, and conservatives wouldn’t be pretending to care about his legacy like they do now, because they still would be fighting against him. (Because they’re racist!)

The Daily Caller reports the story pretty straight, except for how its entire premise, that Waters is “politicizing” a man whose life’s work was inherently and completely political, is full of shit. Of course, that’s usually how that particular website works — fairly straight reporting, letting the bigoted ALL CAPS NON-SPELLER commenters say the outright nasty stuff.

The site goes on to report that Elizabeth Warren politicized MLK by calling Donald Trump an “openly racist president,” which, SPOILER ALERT, he fucking is.

In other corners of online wingnuttia, Drudge is having a conniption linking to a story from the Washington Free Beacon, which is having a conniption about how Reverend Al Sharpton, at an MLK Day breakfast, apparently gently alluded to President Big Macs being a bit of an oinker, which is unfair because A) the president is in perfect health, according to a (possibly faked) White House statement citing Dr. “Ronnie” Jackson, who gave the president his physical, and whose name is actually spelled “Ronny,” and B) conservatives NEVER made fun of Al Sharpton back in the days when he was a larger 300-pound gentleman, no not ever, conservatives are sweet and lovely and do not fat-shame, ever.

(For the record, according to The Google, Al Sharpton is often mean about people’s weight ever since he lost his own 129 pounds, and AL SHARPTON SHOULD STOP THAT. Wonkette obviously has a perfect record on this.)

But perhaps the best example of online caterwauling about the “politicization” of MLK Day came in an opinion piece from Fox News, and, LUCKY FOR YOU, our next post will feature Doktor Zoom yelling loudly about it.

Stay tuned!

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[The Daily Caller]

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  • TheGrandWazoo2

    Because conservatives never politicize anything like the color of a man’s suit or anything.

  • Ryan Denniston

    “The site goes on to report that Elizabeth Warren politicized MLK by
    calling Donald Trump an “openly racist president,” which, SPOILER ALERT,
    he fucking is.”

    A racist is someone who does a lot of racist things. My understanding is generally correct, right?

    • kaydenpat

      Does and says racist things. Trump has gone overboard in making sure that he perfectly fits that description.

      • Mentally Stable Ron

        VERY committed to the role.

        • kaydenpat

          Oscar winning performance.

          • 🛶🗣️ Mr Canoehead 🛶🗣️

            Method acting.

  • wide_stance_hubby

    My post-racial feelings are a very closely held religious belief and she just holocausted me!1!

  • Ryan Denniston

    White people have no room to complain. FFS, they celebrate Christopher Columbus!

    • kaydenpat

      Not all of them do but yeah.

  • Blanche de Shambles

    Like Maxine Waters gives a fuck about what that obnoxious little shitweasel Tucker Carlson thinks.

    Maxine Waters is RECLAIMING HER DAMN TIME!

    • kaydenpat

      She’s reclaiming her time so magnificently that she refuses to sit through Trump’s gloating at SOTU. I wish all Democrats would do the same (Rep John Lewis is skipping it too).

      • willi0000000

        they should make the most junior senator and representative, and only them, attend the SOTU.

        [ then give them hazard pay and a half-day off ]

  • Daniel

    Political correctness would prefer that we substitute the horribly wooly term “talking about things conservatives would prefer we didn’t talk about” for the much clearer and, I’m sorry, unapologetically unPC term “politicizing”. I’m sorry, libs, but conservatives tell it like it is, and calls it like we sees it, whenever you politicize second amendment people, or job creators’ rewards for their own hard work, or teaching the controversy, or accepting we wait for all the facts to come in before judging if a police officer/outsider President who isn’t a politician/god fearing Christian is “racist” or “sexist” or “a bigot”.

    We won’t join in your watering down of the language,so stop politicizing things like we demand!

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      Okay fucker, go ahead insult me. Do your worst. Tell it like it is.

      • Daniel

        Nice try, libturd, but I’m willing to bet you’re bigger than me.
        So much for the tolerant left!

      • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

        “That hat makes you look stupid.”

  • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

    LAND SAKES OH MY STARS FETCH ME MY SMELLING SALTS ALL THE WHITE PEOPLE HAVE NOW DIED OF CONSUMPTION!

    As a white American, I say there is no need to resort to doing such violence to racial harmony in this nation through the use of ALLCAPS. I bid you good day!

    • OutOfOrbit

      and fancy-slanty ALL CAPS too

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

        Hey we have to have some class around here. Oh wait, didn’t I just storm off from the comments?

  • Michael R
    • Empress of the Iguana People

      MLK’d have to change his nonviolence stance for that one

    • kaydenpat

      My sentiments exactly. **snort**

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Have any of he bros over at Phi Kappa Daily Caller mentioned that MLK would be pro-gun on account of, uh, whatever?

  • OT: Today’s high is high is 72. Tommorrow’s is 27. Dyslectics untie!

    • Daniel

      It’s a misread Rush album title!

  • They couldn’t silence the man in life, so they did the next best thing. They turned him into a dead legend which could be safely ensconced in memorials and monuments that let the system that killed him define who he was and what he stood for while ignoring the many, many sermons and speeches that called the United States to repentance for the system that impoverished people, oppressed the poor, sent the young poor and minorities off to die in needless wars, all the while empowering and enriching a handful of men.

  • Empress of the Iguana People

    Of COURSE MLK Jr day is politicized. It’s our public acknowledgement of the need for Civil Rights. I’m probably still pretty ignorant of a lot of the details, but I believe people of color when they say it’s still a needed movement.

    • gnomemansanisland

      Next thing you know they’ll politicize Independence Day.

      • wide_stance_hubby

        And the Fourth of July too!

        • gnomemansanisland

          That’s in the summer, right?

          • wide_stance_hubby

            Yes, which is why we do dramatic re-enactments of the founding fathers’ BBQs to remember.

          • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

            Depending on your hemisphere, yes.

      • Ali | A Grumpy Cat

        Don’t inject your politics into a perfectly innocent holiday about celebrating the birth of firecrackers, DAMMIT. >:(

        • gnomemansanisland

          And hamburgers

          • Ali | A Grumpy Cat

            All hail the holy Big Mac, Amen.

          • gnomemansanisland

            And freedom fries be thy aim

          • Good_Gawd_Yall

            If the holy Big Mac becomes the instrument of dumpy’s downfall, I’ll be the first to get on board with a “National McDonald’s Day.”

    • Ryan Denniston

      Weren’t the people fighting against establishing the holiday politicizing it too? Who doesn’t want another day off!

    • kaydenpat

      With Republicans working overtime to turn the clock back on Civil Rights such as voting, there is no doubt that there is a lot of work left in that arena.

  • fawkedifiknow

    Both parties have their foibles and selective memories, but you never hear Democrats claiming Reagan was actually a liberal, just because he really – not fake news alternative factoid – was a union-boss-Democrat in his younger years.

    • kaydenpat

      If Democrats claimed Reagan as a liberal, I’d call them out. Reagan wasn’t a good person. There’s a reason why modern-day Conservatives worship him as if he was Jesus Christ.

      • mailman27

        I’m reading a book about the 1968 elections, and St. Ronnie actively campaigned for the racist southern vote, running in the same electoral neck of the woods as George Wallace. Reagan was a jagoff.

      • fawkedifiknow

        That’s my point. Although Republicans try to claim a liberal icon – MLK Jr – was a actually a conservative, you never see Democrats claiming Reagan was a liberal (despite the fact that he was SAG president in the 1940’s, I believe it was).

    • SayItWithWookies

      And when he was a union boss he was also a snitch for J. Edgar Hoover.

    • Lancelot Link

      “When a Hollywood performer, lacking distinction even as an actor can become a leading war hawk candidate for the Presidency, only the irrationalities induced by a war psychosis can explain such a melancholy turn of events.”
      -Martin Luther King, Jr

  • mrFawkes

    It’s the perfect day for Fox News to take a knee on reporting news and just run non-stop Hillary emails, uranium one and Clinton foundation breaking news.
    What’s that you say? That happened yesterday and the day before that and the day before…

  • TimResistit

    God, I love Auntie Maxine.

  • Bub the very stable zombie
  • Hanaka

    Can’t wait for the day we’re done smelling that stinky fat gold turd in the White House.

    • Mentally Stable Ron

      That’s a stench that’s gonna linger.

  • Ms.M.Like,Genius on Maui

    If white people hadn’t murdered Dr. King, he might still be here to speak for himself.

    • ariel_gee_398

      So…mission accomplished?

      • Ms.M.Like,Genius on Maui

        It’s much easier to put words and ideas into a dead person’s mouth.

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    All you uppity people had to go and politicize MLK Jr Day. Here we’d finally reached the point where he’d been dead long enough that we’d finally been able to apply a judicious bit of whitewash and declare him “one of the good ones” and you all had to ruin it by remembering the man as he actually was, instead of the caricature we’d all like to pretend he was…

  • kaydenpat

    If any of our current Conservatives were alive when Dr. King was shot, they would have been openly cheering his death just like some of them cheered when John Kennedy, Jr and Edward Kennedy died. Just yesterday. D’Souza mocked Chelsea Clinton for her looks.

    They have a nerve.

    • SDGeoff3

      Especially D’Souza.

    • janecita

      That ugly fucker had the balls to criticize another person’s looks?! Irony is truly dead.

    • Lord Jim

      Nebbish DaFloozy needs to take a long, hard look in the mirror.

  • Hemp Dogbane

    Kevin McCarthy had a staffer’s help giving Trump Starbursts, unlike Sarah Palin, who gave them to Rich Lowry with her mouth.
    https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2018/01/gop-majority-leader-had-a-staffer-pick-out-red-and-pink-starbursts-for-gift-to-trump-because-they-are-his-favorites.html

    • ariel_gee_398

      Oh come on. Jellybeans was too obvious?

  • SayItWithWookies

    Let us never forget that Fucker Carlson’s political predecessors called Dr. King a “professional negro,” “professionally aggrieved,” a professional agitator, a rabble-rousser, a known communist, a shit-stirrer and someone who caused trouble where no trouble ever existed — like among the Memphis sanitation workers who endured brutal working conditions and poverty pay.

    Tucker gets off easy if he’s not villified every fucking day of the year for appropriating King’s name in the service of his own fucking racism.

    • mailman27

      Didn’t the strike in Memphis start when two workers were crushed to death with all the garbage in the truck? Good times.

  • Martini A, very stable genius

    I typically try to shy away from fat shaming, but it’s not that Donnie Dumbass is a lardass, it’s that he’s a racist lardass. And he’s a sexist creep that feels perfectly entitled to mock women that aren’t his idea of an ideal weight or whatever other physical standards he deems imperfect. Therefore, far as I’m concerned, mocking his fat, hypocritical lardass is in bounds.

    • We’re all doomed.

    • little miss high and mighty

      we fully support you in this critically distinct shame comparison.
      Carry on

    • James Baskin

      Don’t forget about his hair. It is astoundingly mockable.

    • Mentally Stable Ron

      Yup. We’re even covered legally, since he’s the one who opened the door.

    • nightmoth

      His “fat-shaming” that Miss Universe who gained–what was it–10 lbs.?–makes him totally a target for me.

    • Lord Jim

      As a fat guy, I approve this message.

      • Ellie

        As a fat lady (and an old) I also approve.

        • Hiss

          Seconded on both points.

      • mailman27

        I am not a fat guy, but it’s no great accomplishment on my part, I just had thin parents. Also, fuck him, too.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Tucker Carlson, is particularly upset with Rep. Maxine Waters

    Thanks for your service, Representative! (And I assume she’s an early front-runner for Wonkette’s 2018 Legislative Bad Ass!)

  • UnsaltedSinner

    If both parties actually opposed racism, a day devoted to the memory of a man who fought racism wouldn’t really be political. Unfortunately…

    • Shan

      Ignoring that racism exists and/or claiming you can’t possibly BE a racist is the best way to avoid thinking one has to DO something about it.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        Racism is bad. I’m a good person. Therefore I can’t be racist. QED

        • Mentally Stable Ron

          Just so. And it’s always proposition 2 where it kinda falls apart.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    But perhaps the best example of online caterwauling about the “politicization” of MLK Day came in an opinion piece from Fox News, and, LUCKY FOR YOU, our next post will feature Doktor Zoom yelling loudly about it.

    Thanks for the warning. Can a person get blood pressure meds OTC? Pretty sure I’ll need it…

    • Shan

      Do you have a pet?

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        I’d assume it’s her dogs she is always walking, otherwise Cally is a DOGNAPPER!

      • Mentally Stable Ron

        I found myself thinking today that it is the dearth of fuzzies in the house that explains my deteriorating ability to cope with current events. I need to talk to the housemate again.

    • Zippy49

      I recommend large doses of whiskey.

      • Bub the very stable zombie

        4-Aco-DMT is sweet.

  • Paperless Tiger

    If Dr. King was a conservative, what the heck are these maniacs we got now?

    • little miss high and mighty

      well, maniacs , for one

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      sociopaths

    • Bub the very stable zombie

      They are “conservatives” in the same sense that the Nazis were “socialists.”

    • amrak63

      Neo-Ratzis.

      But hey, you don’t need to take MY word for it…

      https://i.imgur.com/kR6vYRS.jpg

      • Mentally Stable Ron

        Apropos of nothing, anyone notice how easy it would be to use a swastika as, err, a surveyor’s mark?

        • Covfefe

          No.

        • amrak63

          Once again, someone please make this movie.

          https://i.imgur.com/X0hxwHI.jpg

          • little miss high and mighty

            Ist nation’s rug weavers and pot painters, too, also

          • Mentally Stable Ron

            Anybody have Mr. del Toro’s phone number?

        • little miss high and mighty

          eye- catching vote getter on campaign posters and hindu temples

      • little miss high and mighty

        never have so few
        hated so many
        for so little result

    • jaspersdad
  • janecita

    I don’t know what Dr. King would be doing if he were alive today, but I think that Malcolm X would have been leading the resistance, and kicking some serious Facist ass if he were alive today.

    • Gigglesnort

      People forget (or never knew) how controversial Dr. King was in his lifetime, and not just among Whites .. not all Black people were behind him, either. There was substantial disagreement about how militant the response to Jim Crow should be, and some were certainly on the more militant end (Malcolm X, Stokley Carmichael, etc.). Still, MLK was courageous, eloquent, and persistent, and he deserves having his holiday. But I object to people who want to keep the holiday while erasing all the history that goes with the name.

      • Mentally Stable Ron

        Why should MLK Day be spared the white(sorry)washing every other holiday got, up to and including Christmas and Easter?

  • Spurning Beer

    Mark my words: before this shitshow is over, the Republicans will be backpedaling on Lincoln and emancipation. I mean all of them, not just the advance guard.

    • SayItWithWookies

      There are already enough of them who are bigger fans of John Wilkes Booth than of Abe.

      • amrak63

        Somewhere in the Great Beyond, Abe Lincoln and Jeff Davis are scratching their heads over the role reversal of their political parties.

        • Spurning Beer

          I have high schoolmates who are members of the Episcopal church Jefferson Davis attended when was POTCSA. Cool, woke people. Confusing indeed.

        • theCryptofishist

          Together or separately?

  • Duke

    I just wish people wouldn’t speak for the dead.

  • shivaskeeper

    I read this and I did not die of consumption. Is there a special place I have to go to to get the consumption first? Or does it just happen naturally from the outrage I’m supposed to feel?

    I never get the memo with all the rules in it. You would think that a bunch of neoliberal globalist shills could organize a memo with the rules.

    • jeffg166

      I knew someone, who walking thought a 19th century grave yard, thought consumption listed as cause of death assumed the person died from drinking alcohol.

    • harryr

      I think the consumption is mailled out by the same company that handles the Soros cheques.

      • shivaskeeper

        So I’ll never see it then.

        • harryr

          Sorry…

    • Suse

      Did you at least get the vapors?

      • shivaskeeper

        No memo. Did not know I was supposed too.

    • Bobathonic

      Race traitor.

      • shivaskeeper

        No memo. How was I to know?

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    Here’s the thing: If you go to the Civil Rights Museum in Memphis, which is in the Lorraine Hotel, they start your tour in a room that is dedicated to the path slaves took to come to this country and to move toward freedom. There is a display that shows how the slavers packed the men and women they were transporting like sardines which will make you ache all over just looking at it. People who want to politicize what Dr. King was about need to be forcibly toured through that museum repeatedly, until they get it.
    And if they never get it, they need to be publicly shamed until they get off the stage, in tears.

  • Daniel

    Not being a USian I have to check: are we approaching that time of the year when we hear the traditional cry of the Politically Incorrect who care not for feelings “why is there no White History Month”?

    • shivaskeeper

      That would be every day of every month for the caterwauling.

    • mackafritz, v.s.g.

      Yes. We know nothing about the history of the white man in this country.

      • Daniel

        That’s because there’s no statues.

      • Bobathonic

        A friend sincerely asked me, irt the new African American History museum, why there wasn’t a white history museum. My facepalm put me in a coma and I died.

    • bupkus231

      February is Black History Month, so yeah….

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        except those WATBs squeal about that shit year round

        • bupkus231

          Yeah, but they really ramp it up approaching and in February.

          Approaching dog whistles in frequency and jet engines in amplitude.

    • SayItWithWookies

      That’ll be in February — and you probably won’t have to worry about missing it, as it’ll likely be included in Assmouth’s proclamation of Black History Month.

      • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

        It will be like the Holocaust speech he made without mentioning the Jewish victims.

    • Mentally Stable Ron

      They should be ramping it up soon. Takes a while to get the outrage machine up to speed.

    • Earl Of Sammich

      “White History Month.” We’d have to rename a month, “Cuckuary”

      • Crank Tango

        Cucktober works for me, plus it is a 31 day month, so they can really make the most of it.

        • Daniel

          October is black history month in Britain.

          • Mentally Stable Ron

            I thought October was Puppet History Month?

        • Earl Of Sammich

          It would certainly make picking out a Halloween costume easier. “SS Uniform or Klan hood.”

          • Crank Tango

            This year I’m going with Nazi in blackface.

          • Mentally Stable Ron

            Very meta.

        • Husband Of Mrs God

          The highlight of Cucktoberfest is seducing thier women.

        • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

          Sorry, but I’m still trying to get that month legally renamed “Rocktober”.

          How about Cucktember?

    • Husband Of Mrs God

      South Carolina closes state offices each May 10 for Confederate Memorial Day.

      • Lord Jim

        And they say history is written by the victors…

    • SweetDeeKat
      • wide_stance_hubby

        Beware he who waddles among the hostas. . .

    • calliecallie

      Worth noting that Black History Month is the shortest month of the year. Why is that, do you suppose?

      • Jamoche

        Same reason MLK Jr Drive is always either the shortest or the poorest road.

        • calliecallie

          OMG, yes. The corner of MLK Drive and Malcolm X Blvd in this here community of mine is the saddest street corner I have ever seen. Surrounded by a dead factory,a blighted parking lot and bleak freeways.

      • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

        It is the least they could do.

    • Grumpy Twat

      Well, “April is the cruellest month”, if that helps.

      • Daniel

        Though his shoures are soote.

  • mrFawkes
  • Michael R
    • Husband Of Mrs God

      HA! :)

  • Rick Hill

    Or, at the very least, be urging congress to start working on securing it’s own emails system….I mean, c’mon. Sure, you guys benefited from the Russian interference but how about making sure you’re not going to be open to being blackmailed, ya idjits.

    • Mentally Stable Ron

      They think, since they were the beneficiaries, that their Good Friends would never turn on them. Why, that would be… unfair!

      • georgiaburning

        Russian government turning on its friends? Nyet!

  • OK: look. I didn’t mean to post post on topic. And I didn’t mean to post about another commenter’s euphemism.

    But look, I am an IT. And somewhere out there right now, I need a hard drive to say, and to save, and to be backed up, these digits: “Tucker Farlson.”

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      or Cucker Tarlson

  • Husband Of Mrs God

    MLK Jr conservative? Somebody wake up J. Edgar Hoover, who was painting Dr. KIng as a communist.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      I find it hilarious that Conservatives are claiming DR. King as one of their own. If he were still alive, he’s be as vilified as Obama and Hillary.

      • Justin Thyme

        Yeah, now how did he “pass away”?

    • yyyaz

      Dammit, read down, read down : (. *Note to self, not you*

  • Mavenmaven

    Don’t worry, by next year, at the rate we’re going if things don’t change, next year MLK will be spoken of as a thug, etc.

    • Spurning Beer

      They will be able to just re-run the editorials from 1968.

      • yyyaz

        All ghostwritten by J. Edgar “Who you callin’ a queer, boy?” Hoover.

    • SDGeoff3

      Next year? More likely tomorrow.

  • Spurning Beer

    I think it’s safe to say that if the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., were alive today, he would have a reality/game show franchise on a major broadcast or cable outlet, and one or more tastefully-themed restaurant chains. Duh.

    • Ms.M.Like,Genius on Maui

      He loves to watch Nascar during his free time!

    • TundraGrifter

      Dr. King was born in 1929 – if he were alive today, he’d be 89 years old. So I think the most he’d be doing on TV would be advocating reverse mortgages.

      • Spurning Beer

        Oh, I don’t know. Colonel Sanders is still on TV selling fried chicken, and he’s been dead over 35 years.

        • CripesAmighty

          I thought that was Tucker.

  • ManchuCandidate

    Mad Maxine is not wrong. White GOPer snowflakes freaking out because it’s true.

    • Crank Tango

      What other colors do GOPer snowflakes come in?

      • Marion in Savannah

        Just that one.

      • Raan

        Orange. Cf. John Boehner, Donald Trump

      • Orange

      • alpacapunchbowl

        To paraphrase Zappa, don’t eat the orange snow.

  • Anna Rompage

    Yes, MLK was a republican (not a conservative), as was Abraham Lincoln… And now who would have thought all these crazy southern white folks, and their draconian & xenophobic beliefs would have gone and turned the party of Lincoln, into the bigoted, Jim Crow shitshow that the GOP has become, in the 21st century even….

    • JohnBull

      Well, Andy Jackson was a democrat and he hated Indians. So everyone on here are the real racists because we’re also democrats and probably hate Indians.
      See how easy it is to be a modern conservative? That’s why there are so damn many of them.

      • Anna Rompage

        ROBERT BYRD ROBERT BYRD ROBERT BYRD & guess who used to work for Mr Byrd?

        HILLARY CLINTON!!!!!!

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        I hate the Indians..

        Then again, I’m a Cubs fan

        (actually, I respect them, that was a great world series)

      • vukojebina_MΩment

        It sure beats thinking!

      • Earl Of Sammich

        “Nuh-uh!” & “I know you are but what am I!” Look Mom I’m conserativing like a big boy!

    • Lord Jim

      Bonus Round Question: What was the name of the US President who initiated the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and what was his political party affiliation?

      • Anna Rompage

        Lyndon Johnson(D)

        • Lord Jim

          Ladies and gentleman, we have a winner. :D

        • WomanInThePersistence

          If you get the chance to see his museum, do.

      • yyyaz

        War on Poverty too also.

        • Lord Jim

          Poor Lives Matter? You fucking terrorist!

      • President in Exile Firefly

        Ronald Reagan, duh.

      • Werewolf

        Who successfully fought to put a civil rights plank in his party’s platform in 1948, and which party was that?

    • wobbly

      I got my copy of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 from Senator Kenneth Keating, a Republican, and was really pissed when Robert Kennedy carpetbagged him out of his seat. It’s hard to believe now, but because of what my ancestors suffered in the Civil War (as Irish emigrant Union soldiers), generations of my family voted Republican.

      (They did make an exception for FDR- and talked about it in whispers!)

      When I was growing up, Democrats were referred to in my household as “Dixiecrats’.

      Generations of African-American voters did much the same thing, for similar reasons.

      By the time I was actually old enough to vote, the worm had turned. I registered as a Democrat, and have voted in every election-primaries, school boards, mid-terms-ever since.

    • Opalescent Riddles

      In a Bass Pro shop, I saw a guy in a T-Shirt with a profile of Lincoln on it and a caption that said:

      “They’re still upset about how our party took away their slaves.”

      Fractal wrongness, me droogs.

  • MynameisBlarney

    OT, but…

    Arpaio is so fucking stupid, he didn’t even know that accepting a pardon means LEGALLY admitting guilt.

    https://www.rawstory.com/2018/01/joe-arpaio-learns-about-guilt-on-tv/

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      He also tried to claim that the false alarm in Hawaii proved something or another about Obama’s birth certificate being fake

      • Suse

        Goodbye, Joe
        You gotta go
        Me oh, my oh
        Son of a gun
        Gonna have big fun
        When you croak, oh

        • theCryptofishist

          When you croak die, oh

          Fished it for you.

      • miss_grundy

        He’s just jealous that Bamz bought himself a nice house in Hawaii for the family with all that money he got in his book contract. Arpaio would need a ghost writer to author a picture book.

    • amrak63

      A county’s chief officer of the law for many years does not know the law.

      I don’t know which pony reacts more appropriately:

      Dashie…

      https://i.imgur.com/oB8dAbR.gif

    • TimResistit

      He was unfamiliar with the law? Unpossible!

    • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

      Sheriff Joe’s Campaign Slogan: “I Make Ted Cruz Seem Like Less of an Asshole!”

      • Earl Of Sammich

        “By shitting out of my mouth.”

  • TJ Barke

    Yes, the man that flirted with Marxism and railed about the injustices of capitalism was totally in the republicans’ corner…

    • vukojebina_MΩment

      Ah, come on, Groucho was totally leading him on.

      • President in Exile Firefly

        It’s true.

        • vukojebina_MΩment

          Rapscallion!

    • Bitter Scribe

      I always thought that “flirting with Marxism” stuff was typical wingnut guilt by association. IIRC, one of King’s mentors or something had belong to some commie organization, meaning King was a communist, just like Barack Obama hated America because he had been in the same room with Rev. Wright and Bill Ayers.

      Tangential note: I can’t think why the wingnuts tried (and in some cases still try) to play up the entirely imaginary connection between King and communism, but they ignore Richard Wright, who actually was a Communist Party official for a while (until he got tired of being told what to write).

      • Daniel

        Because I doubt many of them have heard of Richard Wright.

        • Bobathonic

          Steven Wright’s unfunny brother?

          • Daniel

            Pink Floyd keyboard player.

  • La forza del resistino

    If only Dr. King made nice music like that BB King … wait, you say he smoked what?

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    How dare black people tell white people how to feel about black people!

  • vukojebina_MΩment

    If MLK was alive today, he’d be marching not only for civil rights & protecting voting rights, but to urge Members of Congress to accept their responsibility to save the U.S. from a dangerous man who has no respect for our Constitution & no concern for strengthening our democracy

    News flash: Abraham Lincoln would join him!

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Yes and Fox News and the right wing would all try and tie them to emails and Uranium One and ask them why they’re playing the race card.

      • OrG

        Identity politics!

    • theCryptofishist

      Maybe TR also, too.

      Maybe not, which makes me sad. I like TR. *sigh* None of our presidents will ever be perfect.

  • mailman27

    Speaking of large men, Chris Christie got very excited about MILK Day, and purchased a big box of chocolate chip cookies.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      speaking of Governor Krispy Kreme- say “Bye Felicia!”. Today is his last day to chase everyone off state beaches so he can have them to himself

      • mike stone

        Beached while libel??

      • yyyaz

        Finally, some “good news, everyone!”

      • Rebel Scum with permit

        The guy who became a rock star by bullying teachers, thus giving Republicans and working class whites big fat chubbies of their own. May Trump find the same ignominy

      • Jeffery Campbell

        And the sensible people of NJ roared their approval.

    • Ryan Denniston

      At least he and Trump are not tone deaf enough to celebrate with KFC, seeing those too are initials.

    • Lord Jim

      Honest question – why did the Garden state elect this belligerent asshole?

      • Jeffery Campbell

        I wonder that myself. I was and am here. I just don’t understand. And for a while he was wildly popular, mostly for being a belligerent asshole, but still. I’m sick people says “He’s speaks his mind” when people really mean “He’s a unrepentant asshole.”

      • Arolpin

        Mainly because the two previous Democrats were Corzine (Wall St guy, arrogant & rubber people the wrong way, but fairly competent) and McGreavy (I am a gay-American) and the Whitman was semi-competent and was about as much of a centrist as anyone in the Republican Party. Christie ran as another Whitman, but acted like the proto-Trump. He was only re-elected because he shit his fucking pie-hole and accepted help from Obama after Sandy, and the Dems didn’t run much of a campaign (or much of a candidate).
        Had Christie surrounded himself with professional administrators, he could have been mediocre, but he surrounded himself with RWNJ toadies, which is why he did something as stupid as Bridgegate (they told him that lots of Dem endorsements would let him claim to be bipartisan and win the Presidency).

  • nightmoth

    FOX News said WHAT?! Well, I’m gonna jump ahead and leave this right here. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/9babe013e20329292dfc77fc8fe7725812c544e14411909a03582b54b81b9187.png

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    And for sure MLK would go out onto Fox and deplore kneeling for the national anthem and all those uppity BLM folks!

    https://i.imgur.com/rgX5LWD.jpg

  • OrG

    Daily caller huh? Is that like the beta-cuck version of the daily stormer?

    • Carpe Vagenda

      It’s the bright line where Tucker’s mom gave up on buying him a job with hungry man advertising and started straight up paying him to mow the lawn and water the plants.

    • CripesAmighty

      It’s the TV dinner imitation.

    • Jeffery Campbell

      Beta? It’s the fully released version, full of delightful features.

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    Apparently Jeff Flake is going to deliver another anti-Trump speech tomorrow. Weird that he approved most of the unqualified judges Trump nominated.

    • Lord Jim

      Flake might as well STFU and go on home.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        I don’t get it. He knows he’s never going to run again, and he’s already rich, so why not go out in a blaze of glory? I’d be screwing with Trump every damn day if I had the opportunity.

        • Bobathonic

          You haven’t been compromised. Yet.

    • wide_stance_hubby

      He got all excited about a new job when NPR’s ‘Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me’ left him a VM.

      Sadly, it said, keep waiting and keep not telling us.

  • La forza del resistino

    “Donald Trump is racial, but he is not a racist,”
    – Doctor of Letters Omarosa, Univ. of Apprentice.

    • Bub the very stable zombie

      Trump: “In college I was a racist. I lettered in racism. But then I got very, very painful heel spurs, you know…and I couldn’t serve my country in the military. That’s when I had to stop racing.”

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Ugh.

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        He did say that he was the best athlete ever in that interview with the WSJ. Too bad he didn’t spontaneously combust with such an outrageous lie.

    • Jeffery Campbell

      That one needs to SIT DOWN.

  • chascates

    Dolores O’Riordan, Lead Singer of the Cranberries, Dies at 46
    R.I.P.

    https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=cranberries+linger

    • WomanInThePersistence

      That’s very sad.

  • goonemeritus

    I don’t really know what Doctor King would think if he were alive today. Personally I would hope that an America granted another 50 years of his voice would never have had to suffer the embarrassment of having a Trump Presidency.

    • Paperless Tiger

      Where did the government go?

  • Jennifer R

    Hah, the nazi furs made a block list, composed of a handful of old defunct nazi fur groups and a ton of lefty furs and organizations like planned parenthood, and are now offering it as an anti nazi block list.https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/cab0a1e3ed2e0fe106966f3d1098b26d5a9e583237c9148a02fecabd5a426b85.png

    • Lord Jim

      Nazis lying? Quelle surprise.

      • Bobathonic

        clutch, clutch, swoon

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Do you mind if I just smile in a friendly and supportive way?

      • Jennifer R

        This nazi fur with a history of drunk driving got really pissy everyone always points out he is a scumbag and made a fake list to trick people into blocking non nazis via an automated list he made.

        • WomanInThePersistence

          Ummm, he sounds awful

          • Jennifer R

            He is.

          • WomanInThePersistence

            I genuinely like you. And don’t much care for that person. May I offer you internet *hugs*?

          • Jennifer R

            Thank you, I enjoy internet hugs very much.

          • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist
          • WomanInThePersistence

            *hugs* and you are a delightful person.

          • Jennifer R

            *hugs back*
            I have no idea how exactly I became a professional void gazer, but here I am bringing you the worst of a subculture of the internet.

          • theCryptofishist

            I’m glad someone is. If we don’t see and note what they do, we will be blindsided by some destructive piece of nonsense shit that they do.
            Thank you.

      • Kiri the Unicorn

        This sort of thing is why I don’t regret keeping my distance from the fandom.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      I’m not sure what any of this means, but I’m probably opposed to it.

    • Jennifer R
      • John Thorstensen

        It would be irresponsible not to speculate about what that truck is compensating for.

        • Jeffery Campbell

          Speculation not required.

          • John Thorstensen

            Not to brag, but I drive a little car.

          • thixotropic jerk

            I have a Prius for down south and a moderately sized PU (Toyota T-100) for the PNW so…above average? ;^)

          • H0mer0

            (to thine own self be true. )

          • H0mer0

            oops, I thought you were responding to Natalie.
            I guess it works whether you were non commenting on Natalie or Thorstensen

        • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

          And is goathole his furry name?

          • ScottGoode

            Probably his CB handle, too

  • Jennifer R
    • OutOfOrbit

      good-o!

    • don’t start none won’t be none. ¯_(ツ)_/¯

      • Jennifer R

        Pretty simple really.

        • Mary

          Go-o-gle is payin-g- $97 per hour,with wee-k-ly payouts.You can al-s-o avail this.O-n tuesday I got a brand new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $11752 this last four wee-k-s..with-o-u-t any doubt it’s t-h-e most-comfortable job I have ever done .. It so-u-nds unbelievable but you wont forg-i-ve yourself if you don’t check it!dw34s:∫∫∫∫ http://GoogleNewNetJobsThinkPartTimeJobs/get/hourly ♥f♥♥♥r♥♥♥i♥c♥♥♥q♥l♥y♥d♥♥♥m♥♥♥w♥♥y♥♥n♥♥t♥♥♥a♥♥♥t♥r♥♥♥a♥♥♥r♥♥q♥f♥♥d♥p♥♥z♥♥w♥♥y:::::!vw253v:lwei

    • Mehmeisterjr

      Whoo-hoo!

    • Justin Thyme

      “See, not a racist!”

      • Mehmeisterjr

        Beat me to it.

        Also, beat Fox ‘n’ Friends to it.

    • miss_grundy

      Please send copies to Mr. Robert Mueller.

    • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist
    • theCryptofishist

      Jesus Fucking Christ
      It will be the first good thing a Duvalier has ever done for Haiti, if I understand history correctly.

    • ScottGoode

      This whole presidency is giving Doonesbury a run for it’s money.

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    I never thought I’d find myself worried about Nazi sympathizers and white supremacists running the country, in the year 2018. I’m really getting too old for this shit.

    • Justin Thyme

      I’m kinda glad I’m too old for this shit.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        This wasn’t supposed to be how America ended, and it wasn’t supposed to happen while I was alive.

        • Justin Thyme

          God, I know! My younger self used to think I was put here for a particular reason. I’m thinking that again; as a witness to the end.

        • ScottGoode

          Yeah. Bring back Ronnie Reagan. He was determined to end this world but at least it would have been over near instantaneously. None of this sad spiral we have to watch now. Just a flash and a poof and eternal slumber for the human race.

        • Hiss

          No, I rather thought America had whipped the Nazis’ asses a few months after I was born.

  • Tucker had a run-in with auntie Maxine years ago on his show “A Twerp and his Bow Tie” (where by sheer coincidence Rachel Maddow also got her start as a regular). by the time Maxine was done with Tucker, he was sweating and ready for a cookie and a nap.

    • (((Aron)))

      Incidentally, I happen to be sweating and ready for a cookie and a nap.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      Is his show before or after Three Dolts on a Divan?

    • Jennifer R

      I swear he dresses like his mother dresses and hates him.

      • when your parents name you Tucker and your brother Buckley, you know they FUCKING hate you.

        • Jeffery Campbell

          Is that fucked up or what? It’s like a one-way ticket to Vineyard Vines and Black Dog and knowing which airport code is ACK. Douche-a-go-go.

          • John Thorstensen

            Or the many faded over-sand permits on the rusting Land Rover. “I’m extremely rich but folksy!”

        • Villago Delenda Est

          “You little twerps are going to pay for your fucking inheritances if it’s the last thing we do!”

        • theCryptofishist

          tl;dr “Fucker” and “Fuckley”

  • (((Aron)))

    I love Auntie Maxine.

  • CindyinEncinitas
    • WomanInThePersistence

      Oh dear.

    • That seems like the start of an infestation. Kill it with fire!

      • dlemex

        Nuke it from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.

        • Unsaintific

          So is tRump the queen Alien?

    • Bill Diaz

      Let us know when he sends you dick pix! Supposedly his wife dropped the divorce suit, but him pulling a ‘Carlos Danger’ wouldnt be beyond him at all.

      I am frightened for you…

      Have a great day!

      • CindyinEncinitas

        I know you guys have my back. I remain unafraid and unbent!

    • theCryptofishist

      Badge of Honor! If you ever need to think of something to tweet in his direction, I”m sure we can help you.

      • CindyinEncinitas

        Yay. I feel outgunned. I’m not anywhere near that good a shit-talker.

    • phoenix00

      *blows kiss

    • ScottGoode

      Now I want to follow you

      • CindyinEncinitas

        I don’t think I’m all that interesting, really.

  • Most Stable Land Shark

    That’s Reverend Doctor King to you Daily Callous.

  • Jeffery Campbell

    Al is awfully thin. I saw him on the street the other day; he looks like one of those balloons on a stick.

    • H0mer0

      I maintain that he looks like Robert Downey Jr in “Tropic Thunder.”

  • Jeffery Campbell

    Fucking Tom Cotton! “I didn’t hear any derogatory remarks about people or individuals.” No, because he referred to “shithole countries” you fucking chicken-necked POS.

    We now return you to our regularly scheduled program in progress.

    • Unclejeems

      Tom Cotton: Another unfortunate result of Southern brother-sister in-breeding.

      • Jeffery Campbell

        And I’m an Arkansas by upbringing. It’s just horrifying.

        • H0mer0

          I had a wonderful receptionist from the middle east who was found to have a clotting disorder and her “pedigree” revealed some consanguinity theirin. When I apologized to her for my potty mouth, she acknowledged that she has been known to use a few of them words in secret.

      • Old Man Yells at Cloud

        I once heard Martin Mull respond to a heckler with, “Isn’t it a shame when cousins marry”. I have to admit to using that line a few times since then when dealing with assholes.

    • Bad Tom

      Cotton knows how to word a denial so it is technically true, and doesn’t actually deny the accusation.

    • Rooster Cogburn105

      Cotton:
      “1st Sarge, did the men just call me a coward?”

      1st Sarge: “absolutely not, sir, I was there for the whole meeting, and they called you a yellow-bellied, scumsucking, pencil-neck geek, loser streak, ugly little pinhead with a lousy physique, nothin’ but a pencil neck geek! Never once heard the word coward, no sir”.

  • Bill Diaz

    Maxine Waters and many other Americans today, will suffer from what I call the ‘Fortune Cookie’ problem. The fortune within can only be deciphered by adding ‘in bed’, making its true meaning clear.

    I once got a fortune that simply said ‘You are the greatest in the world’, no shit. I have references.

    But if you are looking for what Maxine Waters said or did that pissed people off, what she did wrong, just ‘Fortune Cookie’ it!

    ‘While Black’.

    Anything can be a crime worthy of the death penalty, just by adding those words. Driving while black, voting while black, protesting while black or even presidenting while black have all been crimes worth of prison or even death. President Obama retired having pitched a perfect presidency, no indictments, no convictions, yet opposition to his policies and certainty in his criminality was absolute in the minds of some.

    The simple fact is, for some people nothing you will ever do will ever be good enough if you do it while black and long ago people like Maxine Waters gave up trying or caring if she made those people happy. We are not in the world that King spoke of in his dreams, or even close. In many ways, it is the opposite of the world King wanted, where merely being black and living in government housing made you competent to run a major government with a budget in the 10’s of billions. In King’s world, the idea would be laughable and there is no way that Ben Carson could be the head of HUD, but in the Trumptopia not only is that the case, but our current President is surprised that they dont all know each other.

    Barack Obama was guilty of ‘Presidenting While Black’ and we were sentenced to Trump as our punishment.

    Have a great day!

    • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

      And being more beloved than the orange foolius.

    • H0mer0

      you ARE da greatest, with or without being black.

      • Bill Diaz

        I feel all warm and fuzzy! That is most likely due to me being hairy and wrapped in my blankie though, lol.

        Have a great day!

  • Jo Mathie

    Aside from all the rubbish about Trump not being racist which is patently untrue, I cannot believe his health report. Anyone with eyes can see that he is obese, and given his eating habits and complete lack of exercise (golf doesn’t really count because he’s being driven around in a buggy most of the time) I really can’t believe that he’d get an A on the health tests.

  • mardam422

    Those conservatives and conservative websites are correct. How could MLK have been “political”? He was a negro, for Dog’s sake!! He couldn’t even vote without getting his head stomped on in most of the states below the Mason-Dixon line.

  • Villago Delenda Est

    Is there a greater waste of skin than Tucker Carlson?

    Sadly, yes. There’s Donald Trump and his Ivana spawn, for starters…

    • Old Man Yells at Cloud

      Lil’Donnie is way more skin that Tucker and the spawn combined.

  • President in Exile Firefly

    What most conservatives today forget is that conservatives back then opposed everything MLK stood for.

    • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

      And still do. What he actually stood for, not their “whitewashed” spin of it.

    • Moar Wordz

      And condoned i.e supported and kept in office those who signed orders for the police to pressure hose the civil rights protesters, beat them with billy clubs, call in the National Gaurd, etc.
      ” They seemed nice ! ”
      Their infrastructure is crumbling now like a rotten tree and they’re gonna fight tooth and nail, with every dirty trick they can. KNOW OUR ENEMY.

    • Wookie Monster

      They still do. They just pretend MLK stood for other things.

    • thixotropic jerk

      King was a “commie” and the conservatives back then hated him.
      But now they lurve Putin who is a dictator/oligarch from that commie country.
      So now natch, they lurve Dr. King!
      This has been a public disservice explanation of conservative mind fuckery 6.0

  • Delu

    How better to politicize MLK than to claim that he was part of your party.

    That is something Trumpians have been doing for YEARS and they still are today.

    However, as with almost all other claims they make, it’s a lie:

    http://www.politifact.com/virginia/statements/2016/jan/25/philip-van-cleave/van-cleave-wongly-says-martin-luther-king-jr-was-r/

  • Beelzebubba

    It’s sadly hilarious that white right-wing nutjobs feel compelled to whitesplain to us the true meaning of MLK Day.

    • ScottGoode

      That was the best comment ever made.

    • No. Realsplain.

  • Brian Loudermilch

    “Fake News” and “Revisionist History” are Conservative inventions.
    They know that they can tell as many Lies as they want.
    Their base doesn’t know any better and has absolutely desire to learn.

  • C4TWOMAN

    O/T sorta: Perhaps the Daily Caller is seeing the end of appealing to sane conservatives because it’s now writing puff pieces about a Sandy Hook Hoax Truther:
    dailycaller.com/2018/01/15/michael-rectenwald-nyu-lawsuit/

    He’s whining NYU’s PC culture “harassed him”. A more credible article on the subject:

    http://reallifemag.com/the-learning-annex/

    It’s like the Daily Caller has finished scrapping the bottom of the barrel and now is digging in the dirt underneath….

  • arundel

    I love Auntie Maxine, because she is the best. I regret that one time I tried to slip nerve pills into her tea, because I realize now Auntie Maxine is at her best at Maximum.

  • Rickyphoo

    slightly OT – For a brief moment, I read “Washington Free Bacon” and in that moment, my spirit soared.

    • vivian

      I would prefer the Washington-free Beacon, but to each his/her own.

  • Sakonyachen

    (For the record, according to The Google, Al Sharpton is often mean about people’s weight ever since he lost his own 129 pounds, and AL SHARPTON SHOULD STOP THAT. Wonkette obviously has a perfect record on this)

    My record is not so great. Especially where Chris Christie is concerned.

  • Rick Prose

    That Evan! He cracks me up.

  • Bryan Beecroft

    If Martin Luther King were alive today I suspect he’d be desperately clawing at the inside of his coffin.

  • Jeffery Campbell

    You know what I’d like? a 24-hour Maxine Channel. Twenty-four uninterrupted hours of Maxine being Maxine all day, every day. Probably wouldn’t be on basic cable but I’d pay extra.

    • vivian

      I thought that was CineMax. Guess I gotta look more closely.

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