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Sent Klansmen to prison for killing little girls, never tried to date one.

Alabama’s Democratic candidate for US Senate, Doug Jones, got feisty in a campaign speech today, with a week to go before the special election against Roy Moore, saying “I damn sure believe and have done my part to ensure that men who hurt little girls should go to jail — not to the US Senate.” Jones, you’ll recall, is best known for reopening the 1964 case against KKK members who bombed the 16th Street Baptist Church in Birmingham, killing four girls in Sunday school. Roy Moore, on the other hand, has that whole alleged child molestation thing, not to mention successfully working to keep outdated segregationist language in the Alabama Constitution, for “heritage” or maybe race-baiting, just possibly.

Jones also said he uses guns for hunting, not for “prancing around on stage,” which is a pretty good line if you ask us.

Apparently the criticism stung the Moore campaign more than just a little bit — like delicate snowflakes, they petulantly blocked Jones on Twitter so he won’t be able to read their important messages of Christian love and attacking victims.

What a jerk. There should be a law requiring candidates to debate, dammit — and not just on Twitter. (Did we mention yet that Roy Moore refuses to?) And maybe some basic standards of human decency, which in Moore’s case he has not got.

Look, send Doug Jones money. He won’t embarrass Alabama — or at least, might prevent Alabama from embarrassing itself. Lord knows they need help in that area.

And it is your open thread!

Yr Wonkette loves you and appreciates your donations, for which you should click here. Also, did you see us asking you to send Doug Jones money? Here is another chance to send Doug Jones money!

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  • mailman27

    We’re going under for the third time. Cheers!

  • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

    Don’t know about the rest of y’all, but I’m Jonesing for Alabammy!

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    Debates? Pfft, as if elections are decided on real issues anymore.

    • That’s my fear.

      As to “debates”, I’ve longed to see a reasonable facsimile of a proper debate for evah. The q&a stuff that passes as a “debate” are good for exciting the mouth breathers and getting drunk, but that’s about it.

      • Liddle’ Big Puppy

        This.

    • wide_stance_hubby

      Moore and moore, it’s about who issued and when did they issue and who knew they issued.

      • SterWonk

        And onto whom did they issue.

        … and on that note, I’m going to bleach my own brain.

    • House0fTheBlueLights
  • Nounverb911

    I’m not on twitter, yet I can read moore’s twattings…

  • Nounverb911
    • wide_stance_hubby

      nice

    • JAKvirginia

      Oh. Humor. ha…….ha……..

  • Villago Delenda Est

    Roy Moore is a jerk.

    And a pedophile.

    And a racist.

    And a coward. Shocking to learn he’s a graduate of Hudson High, but he disgraces that institution’s reputation.

    • marxalot

      And he was disbarred for refusing to uphold the law of the United States.

  • schmannity

    Double sekrit Twitter probation

  • Skwerl the Taco Hunter
  • BadKitty904

    What a Moore-on.

    • data_ninja

      Okay, how long have you been sitting on that one, and how come none of us came up with it first?

      (yes, I’m jealous)

      • BadKitty904

        In all honesty, it only occurred to me this evening as I was thinking of rhymes and wordplay on “Moore”. That no one else on here has thought of it IS genuinely shocking!

    • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

      Do forward that one to Jones, posthaste! Those people that would vote for him respond to pithy tag lines better than…you know…issues or morality…

      • BadKitty904

        Good point!

  • mrFawkes

    Curious as to how many Alabama malls and high schools have blocked Moore?

  • Dan Straughan

    I wish every Alabama voter could watch this clip of Oklahoma State Senator Ralph Shortey being busted in a motel room, redolent of marijuana, with an underage boy, WHILE WEARING A T-SHIRT WITH A BIBLE VERSE ON IT. That’s today’s family values Republican. Right there.

    http://kfor.com/2017/12/04/moore-police-release-body-cam-footage-from-night-state-senator-found-in-hotel-room-with-teen-boy/

    • schmannity

      Suffer the little children and forbid them not to come until me?

      • wide_stance_hubby

        ISWYDT

      • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

        You beautiful bastard…

    • BadKitty904

      Late-night, pick-up Bible study?

      • BearGHAZI

        Well, there’s bibles IN THE MOTEL ROOMS. You don’t even have to bring a bible.

        • BadKitty904

          The lube, dildos, condoms, cuffs, et al., are a bit tuffer to explain…

    • willi0000000

      i assume just another lone-wolf . . . from that gigantic pack of lone-wolf bibble thumpers.

      [ doesn’t anybody read Elmer Gantry any more? . . . or watch the movie (Burt Lancaster was great! )? ]

    • Amy!

      Given the bible verse, the picture, and the slogan beneath (Ephesians 5:22, a sandwich, “Now go make me a sandwich”), he really should’ve gotten it on a wife-beater instead of one with sleeves.

    • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

      Praise Jesus and pass the KY!

  • schmannity

    You can’t come to my birthday party!

  • C4TWOMAN

    Some might remember a subthread a week or so ago where we reflected that in the days of battling Scientology online it was considered the ultimate fail to block/ban someone in a debate because clearly that proved you couldn’t win with facts.

    This should apply 1,000× with political figures.

  • BadKitty904
  • Daniel

    Remember, Democrats are wusses and Republicans are tough, real men.

  • Anna Rompage

    Just think, if Roy Moore wins this election, the mall in Alabama that banned him for harassing teen age girls, has more moral fiber & fortitude than the whole of the GOP….

  • La forza del resistino

    Should Judge Roy win, someone needs to tell him not to report for work in Richmond, VA as the War is over and Wash DC is again the seat of govt.

    • willi0000000

      no . . . tell him to go to Richmond and wait for the call.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
  • Nounverb911
  • ariel_gee_398

    Our well-reasoned foreign policy seems to be working out as expected: https://twitter.com/haaretzcom/status/938169505401987074

    • BadKitty904
    • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

      Trump basically told Abbas to his face to fuck off and die.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        How’s that peace process coming along, Jared?

      • Doug Langley

        Are they missing Obama yet?

      • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

        Fuck Donald, fuck Bibi and fuck that hypocritical apartheid state.

    • deadjello

      One wonders how in the hell they can possibly heighten security measures in Israel. Christ, they shoot teenagers for throwing stones and invade Palestinian homes in the dead of night to kidnap people for questioning!

  • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

    The top editor for the National Enquirer, Us Weekly and other major gossip publications openly described his sexual partners in the newsroom, discussed female employees’ sex lives and forced women to watch or listen to pornographic material, former employees told The Associated Press.

    The behavior by Dylan Howard, currently the chief content officer of American Media Inc., occurred while he was running the company’s Los Angeles office, according to men and women who worked there. Howard’s self-proclaimed nickname was “Dildo,” a phallus-shaped sex toy, the former employees said. His conduct led to an internal inquiry in 2012 by an outside consultant, and former employees said he stopped working out of the L.A. office after the inquiry.

    Howard said he wanted to create a Facebook account for her vagina, but Stracher said Howard said that never happened.

    Have editors gone the way of the extinct Dildo bird? Anyway, this whole story is sickening.

    https://www.nbcnews.com/storyline/sexual-misconduct/top-gossip-editor-accused-sexual-misconduct-n826781

    • jesterpunk

      The owner of those rags is friends with Trump.

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

      ‘Course, the guy has built-in plausible deniability, probably by design. “You read this in the National Enquirer? Hah, you know nothing in that rag is ever really true!”

  • Joe Beese

    This is the Apollo Guidance Computer. The computer on the Apollo spacecraft.

    This computer got us to the Moon.

    http://www.nutsvolts.com/uploads/wygwam/NV_0905_Driscoll_apollo_guidance_computer_block_2_display_and_keyboard.1966.jpg

    • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

      What, no spell check?

      What would Clippy say?

      • Joe Beese

        “It looks like you’re trying to travel to the Moon. Would you like help with that?”

        • Msgr_MΩment

          “It looks like you’re running low on air and water, 250,000 miles from Earth. Would you like me to ask Siri to play some Bach?”

          • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

            How about “Fly Me to the Moon”?

          • Joe Beese

            Pfft…. Siri.

            “Hey Siri, how far is the Moon?”
            “Which Moon do you mean? Keith Moon or Sun Myung Moon?”

    • marxalot

      That is a Speak and Spell.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Yes, but can you play Galaga on it?

    • Doug Langley

      “I’m sorry, Neil, I’m afraid I can’t do that.”

    • C4TWOMAN

      That’s the one with a whopping 3 megabytes, right?

      • willi0000000

        2k RAM . . . 36k ROM.

        kids nowadays, you have no idea.

        [ my first (non-company) computer was a 33MHz 80486 with a whopping 4MB RAM and a huge 125MB HDD . . . and i was hugely impressed with it’s speed and storage capacity! ]

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

      And Buzz Aldrin would like to go back there, because some other guy has ruined Earth with his own abuse of teh cyber.

      https://i.imgur.com/2jvrlLv.gifv

    • SterWonk

      I’ve seen one at the Computer History Museum in Mountain View! 🤓

    • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

      Hey! I use one of those to run my sprinklers!

  • Thiazin Red

    Columbia is making limited edition Star Wars coats based on the Hoth costumes, and I want the Leia one so damn badly. Its by far my favorite of all Leia’s costumes and the coat references it without being a costume itself. Even if I’d never seen Star Wars it would still be a cool looking jacket.

    https://www.columbia.com/starwars/?mid=affiliate&eid=cj&uid=10723287&nid=7105398&utm_medium=affiliate#img_kl7u4leia

    • C4TWOMAN

      I’d have to go with Luke’s. It’s similar enough and I suspect the Leia one doesn’t have enough shoulder room. Carrie was quite narrow.
      Thanks for sharing! Hell, this could even be used as part of a River Song costume.

      • Thiazin Red

        It could work for River. I’m guessing that Columbia is using their normal sizes, I just wish they were making more of them so I would have a chance at getting one.

        • C4TWOMAN

          My normal coat size is basically a men’s medium (36-38). Just an hour ago when I boarded the bus the driver aborted calling me sir and apologised. (I really don’t care.. unless I’m looking for a date.). That’s how engrained the assumption men only have broad shoulders is, and directly affects what options the fashion industry gives women. Fortunately I be always preferred masculine style clothing.

    • Nockular cavity

      Ooh, want!

    • janecita

      Cool jacket, but at $400.00 a little too expensive.

      • Thiazin Red

        Its about what a decent winter coat costs anyway so it doesn’t seem that crazy.

        • janecita

          I’m thrifty, I buy mine when they are on sale at the end of the season.

        • weighmaster

          It was 5 degrees when I left for work this morning, I’ve lived here for 35 years and I have never paid $400 for any article of clothing.

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

      You didn’t see this being modeled already?

      http://sws.canoe.com/v1/blogs-prod-photos/6/e/6/2/1/6e621a5e417786ffb2827b012c61b0c1.jpg

      TBH, Canada in late October makes Hoth look tropical by comparison.

  • Daniel

    We all know Moore is going to win.

    We all know he should be hung around the Republicans’ neck like a millstone made from albatrosses. This is the party of personal responsibility, this is the party of morality.

    • Thiazin Red

      They’ve already decided that it doesn’t matter because its totally cool for 30+ year old men to hit on teen girls.

    • BadKitty904

      As long as the Republicans hold Congress – yuuup.

  • marxalot

    At this point, it is reasonable to ask if Roy Moore actually exists, or if he dropped dead two weeks ago and a series of pupeteers and voice actors have been Weekend At Bernie’s-ing him around.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • ariel_gee_398

      I trust that Mueller is approximately 4000 times smarter than anyone in Trump’s orbit or employ, and has a plan in place for what happens if Trump tries anything.

      • Seek

        Flynn’s plea bargain makes him cooperate in state court as well. If this gets fucked up by the Trump assholes it goes straight to NY State AG and Flynn testifies there instead.

    • schmannity

      He is shitting out a bucket of original

      • Joe Beese

        He always struck me as an Extra Crispy man.

      • Raan

        Extra Crispy or GTFO.

      • wide_stance_hubby

        Loving the Cartman life!

      • mappo

        If that were true, there would be tweets.

  • Joe Beese

    I don’t know if I can take another week of this. It feels like the Alabama election has been going on for 17 months.

    • ltmcdies

      Just imagine what’s coming for the mid terms

  • memzilla Ω

    There should be a law requiring candidates to debate, dammit.

    And not just candidates! I love watching Prime Minister’s Questions on C-SPAN. Can you imagine Dolt 45 doing PMQs?

    • OrG

      Yes and it would be hilarious. Especially when dana russiabacher asked him what his favorite color is.

    • schmannity

      Prime ministers have to know law, policy, and shit. Trump only knows the latter

      • Msgr_MΩment

        One can argue that he doesn’t know that, either.

      • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

        Trump only knows two titles: president, and the Queen. He thinks prime ministers are what they call tee vee preachers in Not America. What I’d love to see is the PMs of other countries grilling him on everything from his amplifying of white-supremacist hate groups (even Maggie Mayhem is not amused) to who the fuck has been sleeping in his golden hotel beds and why do they all have names like “Boris” (or, Justin can just challenge him to a boxing match at the Bates Motel in Vancouver).

        You can’t “block” someone from asking an in-person question like you can on Twatbook.

    • wide_stance_hubby

      I am imagining it right now and it is good.

      • memzilla Ω

        Stumble, meet Bum!

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

      I remember an episode of Seinfeld, where it’s revealed that Kramer used to watch PMQs for teh lulz. I think it was the British edition with all its attendant upheaval, because nobody really cares about Canada (where it’s just called “Question Period”) — or didn’t until it became eye candy in 2015…

  • Nounverb911

    The photo won’t be so rare once everyone shares it.

    https://twitter.com/seawaves_mag/status/938129999986593794

    • Thiazin Red

      I don’t get it, is the ship some top secret make or something? Why is the picture so rare?

      • Nounverb911

        Two Navy ships being carried to the States for repairs…

        • Msgr_MΩment

          Just two ships that docked in the night.

          • Daniel

            They warned us about the repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell but we didn’t listen.

    • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

      Didn’t know Vikings still rowed their warships.

      • Nockular cavity

        It’s a Stealth Trireme.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      That is infuriating. Semi-submersible heavy lift ships are awesome, though.

    • capnkrunch

      Of course. It’s ship-shipping ships shipping shipping-ships.

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    Woah, those top legal experts in disarray?! Unpossible!
    https://twitter.com/SafetyPinDaily/status/938165696562974720?s=17

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Makes sense to the wingnuts, I guess:

    https://twitter.com/EricBoehlert/status/938169224429821952

    • Martini Ambassador 🍸

      Bizarro World Day is every day in Fox land.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      Somewhere in the FoxNews studios, producers are rabidly gnawing off their own feet to show how much they hate libruls.

  • cmd resistor

    So they had a hearing on Trump’s motion to dismiss in the defamation case brought by Summer Zervos. Trump has one of those “hey I’m the president, I can’t be getting sued and shit” arguments, as far as I can tell. Maybe I’m being overly optimistic and of course I wasn’t there, but this little snippet makes one wonder if the judge was buying it:
    “The motion today has nothing to do with putting anyone above the law,” Kasowitz told Justice Jennifer Schecter. Under the Supremacy Clause, he said, “a state court may not exercise jurisdiction over the president of the United States while he or she is in office.”
    Schecter occasionally stopped Kasowitz to ask him to clarify his views on her jurisdiction. She asked him if it mattered that she would not be directing the president in his official duties, only potentially ruling on whether his comments as a candidate defamed Zervos.
    Kasowitz said it made no difference.
    “What that means is the president being haled into court, and once the president is haled into court there are innumerable obligations that flow from that,” he said, saying this would amount to inappropriate “control” over the president.
    Mariann Wang, the lead lawyer for Zervos, argued, “There is no case that holds that a federal official cannot be held to account in a state court.”
    Trump’s lawyers did not dispute this. ” https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-trump-accuser/trump-lawyers-say-judge-lacks-jurisdiction-for-defamation-lawsuit-idUSKBN1DZ2FU?il=0
    Judge hasn’t ruled yet.

    • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

      *cough* Clinton v. Jones *cough*

      • jesterpunk

        For extra bonus fun times one of the lawyers in that case was George Conway. That is Kellyanne’s husband.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          “Surely, IOKIYAR takes precedence here, in some way!”

        • Carpe Vagenda

          One of the lawyers was also Kellyanne, and another one was Ann Coulter, and they should have all been disbarred for the way they did that poor dumb bitch. They admit not giving her settlement offers, and then when the wingnut foundation support went away they took all of the fraction of an offer she eventually got.

          • jesterpunk

            Yeah they where shitty lawyers who used that for political gain. But its yet another example of republicans getting fucked by their own actions coming back to bite them in the ass. That is the part I am really enjoying.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            Oh, me too. Especially the part where they wanted to make George the lord god king lawyer of us all but he would have had to argue that POTUS couldn’t be dragged to court when he was the one who set that precedent in the Supreme Court, if I recall.

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      Wang acknowledged that the president holds a unique position but noted that even the president has downtime. They could, for example, meet Trump during one of his weekend visits to his Mar-A-Lago resort in Florida to record a video deposition, she suggested.

      WTF–they could do it between his rounds of golf!

    • jesterpunk

      KAC’s husband set precedence that a sitting POTUS can be sued.

      • cmd resistor

        Yeah, I don’t see how this is any different, although there may be fine points. Not that his lawyers would know them. Sounds like the basic B.S. Trump Lawyer Rule.

        • jesterpunk

          The difference is Trump is a republican?

        • ariel_gee_398

          They’re trying to say that Clinton v. Jones only held that a sitting president can be sued in federal court, not state court. I would be pretty surprised if the state court agreed.

          • cmd resistor

            Fingers crossed. Judge is probably Mexican or something. Surprised he didn’t argue that a woman judge can’t be impartial to him. Maybe he’s saving that for after he loses this round.

      • schmannity

        He’s fired!

    • hudson

      too big to be held accountable?

      • cmd resistor

        That’s the basic Trump Rule, whether president or not.

    • Beelzebubba

      “Once the president is haled into court there are innumerable obligations that flow from that.”

      The obligation to tell the truth is the one that has him worried.

    • GHERKINS du RESISTANCE!

      Well, that’s easy then.

      He can always resign.

  • Nounverb911

    But it’s only been a state for 196 years!

    So Mississippi is taking credit for the FOUR YEARS IT WAS AT WAR WITH THE US? I call bullshit on that….

    https://twitter.com/markknoller/status/938146641563082754

    • biologydave

      Will the exhibit include the 2013 ratification of the 13th amendment?

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      What? So now you want to make a federal case out of a little treason? Libtards.

  • memzilla Ω
    • marxalot

      Marlette has got a real “nightmare Dr Suess” thing going on, huh?

      • Spurning Beer

        Can’t believe they let him work at the Pensacola News Journal.

      • Spurning Beer

        Can’t believe they let him work at the Pensacola News Journal.

      • Spurning Beer

        Can’t believe they let him work at the Pensacola News Journal.

  • BadKitty904
  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Still pissed he voted in favor of the tax giveaway but I’ll give credit where it’s due:

    https://twitter.com/JeffFlake/status/938160754490052609

    • Anne Of Green Bagels
    • Anna Rompage

      Meh, he’s about as admirable as Susan Collins… By which I mean not at all…

    • wide_stance_hubby

      Game over Asshole.

    • Bill D. Burger

      And yet today he sat right beside serial woman abuser Trump as he full throatedly endorsed Roy Moore and allowed himself to be used as a prop.
      Poor Flakee’ ___ so conflicted and little backbone.

      https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DQUM_UlVAAU6XUF.jpg

      • Carpe Vagenda

        What a fucking grownup.

      • IdRatherBeDancing

        Yup. No credit from me.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Truly, a courageous stance on the difficult question of whether child molesters should be elected to the US Senate.

      Sorry, Jeff, but the bare minimum is a little more than you are doing.

      • BigBoppa ~ Résistent

        Bare minimum would be thoughts and prayers.

        • everstar

          Okay, bare minimum plus $100.

    • Joe Beese

      I’d be more impressed if he donated the amount his family is going be enriched by the tax bill he voted for.

      • HooverVilles

        THIS!

    • Shan

      Yeah, show us a copy after it’s cashed.

      • Ω cynmac’s reclaiming her time

        THIS^^^

      • Prollynottoday

        Jeeze Loueeze ! Where dun gone the trust ?!

        • Beelzebubba

          He’s a Republican.

        • Shan

          In Flake? Um…

      • HooverVilles

        Second this!

    • Doug Langley

      Gosh, a whole hundred bucks! He better apply for food stamps!

    • Kryptonian Canis

      He doesn’t mind pushing the trickle-down economy scam, but becoming the official party for child-molesters & pussy-grabbin’ just don’t sit right with old Jeff, I guess.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Gun prancing did not make it into the Olympics again this year, due to the higher than expected number of dicks shot off during the demonstartion for the IOC.

  • janecita
  • Bill D. Burger
    • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

      Same as it ever was.

    • Shan

      Ugh.

    • IdRatherBeDancing

      Lady too old! Must be younger than 16.

  • Joe Beese

    News for The Olds:

    Christine Keeler, the former model at the centre of the Profumo affair that shook British politics in the 1960s, has died aged 75, her family and a close friend have said.

    Keeler, then a teenage model and showgirl, became famous for her role in the 1963 scandal that rocked the establishment when she had an affair with the Tory cabinet minister John Profumo and a Russian diplomat at the same time at the height of the cold war. Profumo was eventually forced to resign after lying to parliament about the affair.

    https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2017/dec/05/christine-keeler-former-model-at-heart-of-profumo-affair-dies

    • bupkus231

      Hmm if Keeler just died at 75, that means she was 21 in 1963. I guess she could have been Profumo’s mistress for a couple of years before that ( thus qualifying her for the Guardian’s characterization of her as a “teenage model” )….

      Still, Profumo was no Roy Moore….

  • lucidamente
  • BadKitty904
    • weighmaster

      That’s some genuine Alabammy spelling right there.

    • biologydave

      “It’s Libety vs Tranny on tonight’s American Gladiators!”

      • Raan

        I thought that was the matchup for the Divas Championship.

    • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

      I’m Lenin this alone.

      • OutOfOrbit

        Oh For … !

      • lucidamente

        He was so hot to Trotsky.

      • Nockular cavity

        You’re getting bad Marx for that one.

        • Daniel

          I heard if you write a pun that bad it makes your ‘and drop off.

      • Raan

        Aw, c’mon, quit Stalin!

        • Daniel

          These are all jokes I’ve heard before. I was hoping there’d be new engels on this theme.

          • Raan

            It’s hard when Soviet leader jokes aren’t quite at the Pieck of freshness.

          • therblig

            well, they are a bunch of bloc heads, after all

        • OneYieldRegular

          If I read many Mao of these, you’ll see me Li Ping out of this window.

      • IdiokraticKulturKommissar

        You’re commune on too strong.

        • keinsignal

          A little too hot to Trotsky, one might say.

      • Red Richmond

        The Chairman says you need to stop that right mao.

        • Werewolf

          Chou ‘nuff!

    • lucidamente

      Lenin’s stage name was “Miss Liberty.”

      • Daniel

        Actually, it was Julianne Off.

        • lucidamente

          Also, Tovar Bitch Lenin.

  • Anne Of Green Bagels
    • janecita

      Your puppy? So cute!

      • Anne Of Green Bagels

        he’s keeping me sane.

        • janecita
          • Anne Of Green Bagels

            awwwww! :)

        • Ms.MLG on Maui

          Is he a Westie?

          • Anne Of Green Bagels

            yes.

          • Ms.MLG on Maui

            My older dog is a Cairn mix, which is the “cousin” of the Westie. Such wonderful little dogs!

          • Anne Of Green Bagels

            never had a better dog. these little terriers with their huge personalities are the most amazing companions you can wish for.

          • nightmoth

            I really want a terrier! We’ve got two rescue dogs now, both big, and I need a lap dog to round out my pack.

          • Anne Of Green Bagels

            plenty of Westies need rescuing and there are specialized rescues for Westies. ours came from one in Texas.

          • Paul

            Our family had one years ago. Wonderful mutt, fearless as hell. Went after dogs ten times its size to “protect” us.
            I grew up on a small lake and if you tossed a Frisbee just right that Westie would run out of lawn, leap up and grab it and end up in the water. Then proudly return it and go bonkers till we tossed it again.

            Know what Westies love to chase? Skunks, the ones that had a home down on the bank. Ma was a big believer in tomato juice so that critter was pink, a lot.

          • Paul

            Our family had one years ago. Wonderful mutt, fearless as hell. Went after dogs ten times its size to “protect” us.
            I grew up on a small lake and if you tossed a Frisbee just right that Westie would run out of lawn, leap up and grab it and end up in the water. Then proudly return it and go bonkers till we tossed it again.

            Know what Westies love to chase? Skunks, the ones that had a home down on the bank. Ma was a big believer in tomato juice so that critter was pink, a lot.

          • Ms.MLG on Maui

            Hahaha! I was very lucky in the skunk department back home. My dog prefers to roll in cow shit, thank you very much! We don’t have skunks on Maui. Plenty of cow shit, though.

          • Paul

            Our family had one years ago. Wonderful mutt, fearless as hell. Went after dogs ten times its size to “protect” us.
            I grew up on a small lake and if you tossed a Frisbee just right that Westie would run out of lawn, leap up and grab it and end up in the water. Then proudly return it and go bonkers till we tossed it again.

            Know what Westies love to chase? Skunks, the ones that had a home down on the bank. Ma was a big believer in tomato juice so that critter was pink, a lot.

    • BadKitty904

      Who’s a such GOOD boy?!??!

    • Shan

      Lookit that nose!

    • Red Richmond
    • IdRatherBeDancing

      My asshole puppy (who busted my Mac just now and had to get new one) https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/14cb2a4deca1a181fb03b503294e3db21135469385fefb8af8712c7e9e0a4150.jpg

      • Anne Of Green Bagels

        new Mac or new puppy? 😲

        • IdRatherBeDancing

          yes …..lol … new Mac. For some reason I like him.

          • Anne Of Green Bagels

            I know. you can’t stay mad at these monsters. mine once chewed up an antique love seat.

    • From this morning. They were mad at me for going to work instead of staying in the pupper pile. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/604a84a832b9f7357912cc4e5a833a1ef203c58bc3836af9f328417cd8415140.jpg

      • Anne Of Green Bagels

        guilt trip^3.

    • Mary Theresa

      Oh shit, you made me cry. I had a dog that looked just like that, he died 3 yrs ago. We called him “special ed”, because he was almost blind and hearing impaired.

      • Anne Of Green Bagels

        I’m sorry to hear that. :(

        • Mary Theresa

          He was a good boy… and loved.

  • Bill D. Burger
    • hudson

      loophole larrys are all these guys are. they have no morality of their own. and these are supposed to be some great virtuous men. whatever. fuck you and fuck the subculture that entertains this type of thing.

    • Beelzebubba

      Daughters are just property to this fuckwad – he’d better re-read the long form Commandments.

  • lucidamente
    • BadKitty904

      Turn up the heat, Doug!!!

  • Nounverb911
  • Joe Beese
    • gallbladder

      Troll level: Expert.

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    Surprise! Or, yanno, not really. But it’s on record now:

    NBC News reports that Veselnitskaya told the Senate Judiciary Committee about Trump Jr.’s request. She told the committee in written answers to questions that she had no evidence of illegal donations, and that when she told Trump Jr. that, he became uninterested in the meeting

    https://twitter.com/thehill/status/938171879239675904?s=17

    • Bill D. Burger
      • hudson

        subtext: i’m so constipated, i went to the jungles in search of normal motions.

        • Bill D. Burger

          Every time I see that picture, I start cheering for the Blair Witch.

          • Beelzebubba

            I keep wondering if the boots went straight back into the box after the photo shoot.

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson
      • Joe Beese

        Who, in 1977, was still naming their son “Junior”??

        • Thiazin Red

          We had a the IV in my class, so some people still do.

        • Raan

          George Foreman.

        • puredog

          Um — narcissists?

    • Thiazin Red

      So even Russian spies admit that the Clinton Foundation did nothing illegal, so can people shut the fuck up about it being a “scandal” forever now?

      • Impatient

        We likes Putins people. They seem nice. We b’lieve them.

  • Ω cynmac’s reclaiming her time

    Ohhhhh. Doug Jones is getting salty!

  • Kryptonian Canis

    Hot damn! It’s about time a Democrat got angry and decided to fight back.

  • BadKitty904
  • Bill D. Burger
  • Martini Ambassador 🍸
    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      Just send $20. Not much (I’d do more if I could), but it’s worth it to me to know I did everything I could to make it happen.

    • Impatient

      Weren’t we just “Go Doug-ing” above already? Oh, I see. There’s more than one Doug. Neverrr miiind.

  • Bill D. Burger
    • Been home to child molesters long before 2017.

      Too many words, just rename Alabama “Kidfucky”

  • Beelzebubba

    But those four girls were black. Which makes all the difference to half of Alablammians.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
  • Bill D. Burger
  • memzilla Ω

    O/T Nice Time! Watch Ralph Shortey, the former state senator and head of Twitler’s Oklahoma Campaign, get busted for smoking dope with a 17-year-old boy in a motel room.

    “Can you show me that he’s only 17?” Shortey asks one of the cops.

    “No! I can’t,” the officer laughs. “But I can convince you that he is. I can put you in handcuffs and put you in the back of a car.”

    BRB making another Schadenfreude Eggnog.

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸
  • Ms.MLG on Maui

    I just finished mailing out Christmas gifts to NC and TN. I am ON IT, DOGGONE IT. With any luck, they will make it through their 5,000 mile journey intact, and well before Christmas. The Moms and sisters and nieces all received something made and sold right here on Maui, and the kids got money, too. It’s a good feeling to support the people of our community. Just wish I could be there when the kids open their gifts.

    • C4TWOMAN

      You just posted this to make everyone who does their shopping on Xmas Eve feel bad….

      • Ms.MLG on Maui

        Most packages I send back home get there in a reasonable amount of time, but every once in a while, one will go rogue, take weeks to get there, and show up looking like someone used it as a football. Not this Christmas, Satan!

        • C4TWOMAN

          Don’t worry. I think Satan will be busy at Melania’s Christmas Gallery of Death this year….

    • Shan

      You just reminded me of some soap I bought at a local woo-shop my daughter goes to. The owner picked it up in Hawaii, apparently, and the one I got is called Filthy Hippie (or something like that). Of course it smellls like patchouli.

      • Shan

        Owner, not “inert” dammit. My phone is being stupid.

      • Ms.MLG on Maui

        I’m pretty sure I’ve seen those! They have other ones, like Dirty Cock, and it has a rooster on the package.

        • Shan

          The packaging is light brown and has some sort of retro-looking artwork, I think. Not only do they smell divine, the scent lingers.

    • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

      I am starting the laborious process of sending my niece and nephew gifts. At least they have wish lists to work from (though I went off-script and got the Little Golden Books Star Wars set).
      What the hell I’m going to get my Dad is another story…

      • Ms.MLG on Maui

        My Dad was always the hardest to buy for! He knew what he wanted once every 3 years or so. Those were easy years!

        • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

          I got him a new wallet for his birthday. I ordered him a “pyromaniac squirrel” t-shirt from TeeTurtle. Maybe a new pair of slippers…

  • Nockular cavity

    So if Moore gets elected, does he have to notify his new neighbors in DC?

  • Debbie the Unpaid Protester

    I signed up to text-bank for Doug Jones, via a group called Indivisible

    Election Day is December 12.

    What: Indivisible text-banking from your state
    Where: Anywhere! You just need two spare hours, a comfy chair, and a computer or iPad.
    When: 12/2, 12/3, 12/9, 12/10, 12/11, and 12/12, from 9am to 9pm CT every day
    Who: Indivisible groups across the country and volunteers like you!

    http://www.indivisible.org/gotv-alabama/

  • h4rr4r

    I now wonder if Moore stole that gun from a little girl.

    • Raan

      In Alabama? Probably.

      • h4rr4r

        It sure looked like a ladies gun.

        • BigBoppa ~ Résistent

          They told him it was an alpha male Derringer.

          • h4rr4r

            I bet it is for people with small hands! Trump probably carries the same model.

          • h4rr4r

            It was a revolver though. Do they make them in revolver? I know they made pepperbox models a long time ago.

          • BigBoppa ~ Résistent
          • h4rr4r

            I bet that thing is great protection from mosquitoes and flys.

          • Raan

            I hear the real model name is the Pretty Princess Power Pistol, .17.

        • puredog

          Prances around, carries a ladies’ gun, unable to cope with grown-up and mature women. . .nah, no pattern there.

        • Kryptonian Canis

          I reckon that’s the shoot-your-dick-off model. It’s small so it’ll fit in the front pocket of your jeans.

          • Impatient

            Okay, but still, is it sufficiently accurate?

          • h4rr4r

            It must be a very accurate gun to hit Roy Moore’s. Small target.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Oh yeah, that’s why I don’t read their paper even though their coverage of business and financial news can be good:

    https://twitter.com/EricBoehlert/status/938173554591522817

    https://twitter.com/WSJopinion/status/938135015401099265

  • Doug Langley

    Okay. Stopped by the staffing agency and finished the forms. Then the bad news. The job they had promised me already got filled. Sorry. Good news. A new one just popped up and I got that one. More money, second shift (I’m a night owl), might be a little easier. I start tomorrow. Should last through 1st week January.

    • BadKitty904
      • Doug Langley

        It wasn’t exactly winning the lottery, and will probably wear me out, but I appreciate the sentiment.

        • BadKitty904

          It’s a job at Xmas-time. That’s a ladle full o’ gravy in anybody’s book!

          • Impatient

            Will we all receive the presentz?

          • BadKitty904

            We already have. Our happiness at Doug’s good fortune!

          • Doug Langley

            Oh, yes. All the breath mints and fidget spinners I can afford!

      • SkinlessGenderlessMan

        “Looks like Johnny’s gettin’ laid!”

    • Debbie the Unpaid Protester

      Yay! I am so happy for you!

    • starfanglednut

      Yay!

    • Lurkylu

      MAGA?

      **brace for kidney punch**

      **and kick in the lady nads**

    • therblig

      don’t spend it all on booze, women, and movies. now, booze, women, OR movies is up to you.

      • No, invest it and build that $11 million estate, so you can leave it to heirs tax free!

        • Doug Langley

          Right! Why, if I skip my weekly chocolate bar, I’ll save up a fortune in no time!

          • If, at age 1 years old, you invest that weekly chocolate bar money, by the time you’re 100, you’ll have over $1 million. By the time you’re 180 years old, you’ll have $10 million. Then you can write a fat check to Mitch McConnell (he’ll be over 250 years old, and looking exactly like he does now). And your heirs won’t pay a penny when they inherit your fortune. Ain’t America grand?

          • Doug Langley

            And to think I actually believed cutting funding to math classes would have no benefit!

    • Angela Ruzzo

      Huzzah! I got this photo of a double rainbow earlier today. I knew it meant good luck for someone, and I’m glad it’s you. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/9ae7fb37a43308a9fd4fa8a8a40f578eab5c1ae15b917fad5b5189110a407621.jpg

    • Paul

      Second shift is good. Yay you.

    • Mary Theresa

      I always liked second shift, less supervision and hassle from muckity mucks.

    • JAKvirginia

      What kind of work do you do?

      • Doug Langley

        IT stuff, I teach at community college. But money’s run out and I can’t wait until spring semester, so I’m doing a temp warehouse thing until that starts.

  • Saxo the Grammarian
  • Impatient

    So I think I saw a headline, over on Huff Post, saying the Wall Street Journal is now printing articles/columns to weaken or attack Mueller. Which shithead bought the WSJ? And is trying to give us our best, real-life demonstration of what monied, right wing (redundant?) ratfuckers will do with the fourth estate? So much losing!

    • janecita

      Rupert Murdoch owns it.

      • Impatient

        Thanks. You, not him.

    • Kryptonian Canis

      Editor-in-chief, Gerry Baker. He’s nestled right up in Trump’s ass next to Sean Hannity.

  • canes_pugnaces

    My guess: Moore takes it by 2%.
    Why, you ask?
    Alabama, Jake. It’s Alabama.

    • BadKitty904

      I’m sure Russia has given the GOP plenty of advice on hacking voting machines…

    • starfanglednut

      Yeah, he’s gonna take it. Fucking RNC is financing him now.

      • RNC jumping back in means RNC is worried? Also, this Busby write-in guy, the Alabama Republican version of Jill Stein…

    • Angela Ruzzo

      I think he will. The mindset of a certain segment of Alabamians is “What god damn right does anyone outside the god blessed state of Alabama have to tell us we can’t vote for a god damn pervert if we god damn want to!”

    • IdRatherBeDancing

      I hope Clemson beats their ass again.

  • Joe Beese
  • OneYieldRegular

    I’m actually not sure which is most disqualifying about Moore: his pedophilia, his misogyny, his racism, his homophobia, his refusal to recognize the separation of church and state, his tiny-gun-waving violent rhetoric – or his fear of Twitter.

    • Impatient

      His multi-tasking, however, is outstanding!

    • BigBoppa ~ Résistent

      AOT, K?

    • canes_pugnaces

      Why can’t it be all of those, along with being a coward and a pervert.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      He is clearly over-qualified at under-qualifying for the job, but that is not what bothers me. There are millions of men out there not so different from him, they just don’t happen to be running for the US Senate and so we don’t know who they are, which is scarier. What bothers me much more is that there are millions of people in Alabama who don’t care and will vote for him anyway. Those people truly scare me.

    • Don’t forget the stupid cowboy hat. And the stupid residing beneath it.

    • IdRatherBeDancing

      You forgot his anti-semitism as well. He’s pretty awful all the way around and that’s without the kid diddling.

    • bupkus231

      What about his disrespect of the ( federal ) law? The man ignored court orders twice. He should have been jailed, not just thrown off the court.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Vorhees

      “contracted by the evidence.”

      For Shame, Nate Silver!

      • Impatient

        Hey, lots more folks could stand to contract a case of the evidence.

    • Thiazin Red

      Sadly voters have the memories of goldfish, so even if they’re mad now it has no bearing on 2018. Hell next week they’ll have forgotten.

      • theCryptofishist

        What did you say?

    • Debbie the Unpaid Protester

      Keep calling Republican congresscritters (whether they’re yours or not), and leaving them messages browbeating them about this.
      I call after hours (I have a bit of phone phobia), and never have to talk to a human being.

      • Prollynottoday

        I can certainly understand. I find talking to human type beings is highly overrated.

      • Gosala

        Calling not your Congress critter is not recommended. They only care about their own constituents.

        So I’m told

        • GHERKINS du RESISTANCE!

          Your political contribution money doesn’t even have to respect their district boundaries.

          You can always remind them of this.

          “I’m not a constituent of yours, but listen, my dollars will be able to be spent by any candidate opposing you, just fine. “

          • Gosala

            Good point (and they’ll never know I have no monies to give)

    • What breaking news that people were behind this? Even the Trumpians I know, and there are so many!, are freaking out

      • redarmyzombie

        Tell them they got what they fucking voted for.

    • Gosala

      Yay! I guess… will it change any seats in Congress, any governorships, any state legislatures?

  • memzilla Ω

    Nothing to see here, folks. Keep moving.
    https://twitter.com/KenDilanianNBC/status/938167738148835328

    • Joe Beese

      … Veselnitskaya’s written answers reinforced what has long been understood about the Trump Tower meeting …

      Was Junior even denying it any longer?

    • Debbie the Unpaid Protester

      Gawd, what a derp.

    • ASKED for it.
      Not volunteered! He ASKED for it

    • IdRatherBeDancing

      The face of stupid.

    • Gosala

      I am waiting for the day when that clan looks upon their works and despair, the day they are bankrupt, bereft of friends, allies, sycophants, the day they they cry bitter tears of regret, the day they see the destruction they have wrought, the evil they intended and brought about, the day they see their lives are empty, miserable leading toward annihilation.

      On that day, there will be hope for them, but not until…

      • Christopher Story

        My personal dream is that Melania leaves Trump to rot in jail and changes her and Barron’s last names to erase him from their lives.

  • ken_kukec

    “Warning: No one over 18 allowed to access this Twitter Account”

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Debbie the Unpaid Protester

      And I’m okay with that.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      Shhhh! He’ll hear you!

    • Beelzebubba

      They must have had ALL of his lawyers screaming at him at once. It’s possible that they physically pried the fucking phone from his tiny, greasy fingers.

  • Jeffocaster in the East

    What do the gays want? Their cake and eat it too!!!!!! When do they want it? NOW!!!!!

    • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

      Not just gays. Since you mentioned it, I could use some cake too. (Goes to kitchen to check cupboards for ingredients.)

      • WIDTAP

        Cake or death?

        • Angela Ruzzo
          • BigBoppa ~ Résistent

            Needs more chocolate.

          • Angela Ruzzo
          • Prollynottoday

            That white bovine beverage.

          • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

            want

          • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

            What a way to go!

          • Doug Langley

            Once had lunch at a restaurant that featured a dessert called “Death by Chocolate”. Of course I had to try it. Chocolate cookie with chocolate brownie on top with chocolate ice cream on top with chocolate sauce . . . I’m thinking there was more, but went into something of a coma thing . . .

          • Ω cynmac’s reclaiming her time

            Houlihan’s (RIP)

          • Angela Ruzzo

            Did it have some of those little chocolate sprinkles on top that look like ants? I’m a sucker for those.

          • Doug Langley

            Probably, but everything was just a blur after 10 minutes.

          • Angela Ruzzo
          • Impatient

            Couldn’t recall where I’d had a “Death by Chocolate.” Bennigans I think. But now their location near me has gone belly up. And, from their website, it appears they actually have trademarked the name “Death by Chocolate.” This planet sucks! I want a do-over!

          • Doug Langley

            This was in Dallas. Might have been Bennigans. It was an office lunch.

          • Impatient

            Well, THAT stopped my scrolling. What a way to go!

          • Angela Ruzzo

            Chocolate chips were invented in 1937 by a woman – Ruth Graves Wakefield of the Toll House Inn in Whitman, MA. Let’s give the lady a hand, why don’t we? Can we give her a posthumous Nobel Peace Prize?

          • Impatient

            AOT Prizes, Katy! Chooocolaaate!

          • Meccalopolis

            My dad used to tell us we were gonna get cookies at the toll booths on the throughway. Whrtr are the cookies? Oh, I ate them. Grrr

          • Meccalopolis

            That looks sinful

        • IdRatherBeDancing

          death please — oh, wait, cake. I meant cake!

          Oh, ok.

          • WIDTAP

            You’re lucky we are Church of England

      • Jeffocaster in the East

        In my case pie.

        • Pie is the superior dessert.

          • Doug Langley

            You know, you’re the 3.14th person to say that.

          • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

            Oooooooooooo

          • theCryptofishist

            They go on forever about it.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            Stop it with the pi jokes! – you’re giving me horrid flashbacks to high school geometry, which I believe is a violation of my constitutional rights.

          • Doug Langley

            Terribly sorry. Didn’t mean to go off on a tangent.

          • Angela Ruzzo
          • redarmyzombie

            It can be really divisive.

    • Prollynottoday

      REMEMBER THE CAKE 1!1
      TIPPICANOE AND CAKE TOO 1!
      I HAVE NOT YET BEGUN TO BAKE !1

      • mailman27

        Will we like it ? (Them?)

    • Gosala

      It’s why I always have two cakes.

      • Doug Langley

        A balanced diet is a cake in each hand.

    • IdRatherBeDancing

      We’re here
      We’re queer
      We want cake*
      Get over it.

      *Gay boys don’t actually eat cake — carbs and all.

      • Marion in Savannah

        You mean gay boys don’t hit the gym? Ever?

        And you don’t even eat those cakes we like?

        Now I haz a sad for all the gay boyz.

        • IdRatherBeDancing

          Gym and no cake! lol

          • theCryptofishist

            Go, Bears!
            (Such a Berkeley thing to say.)

      • wide_stance_hubby

        Gay boys, no. Gay men, fuck yes.

  • Michael R
    • BadKitty904

      Why not just hold up an icing gun, ya pantywaist…

      • SpideySenser

        Glue gun LIBELZ!!1@1!

    • Gosala

      “It shoots tiny, ladylike bullets. ”

      — Nancy Reagan (according to Gary Trudeau)

    • Angela Ruzzo

      I’ve got a soldering gun bigger than that.

    • wide_stance_hubby

      That’s what she said.

    • SpideySenser

      Shoots blanks.

  • Marion in Savannah

    So. Every now and then I have 5 or 10 minutes to waste and a cranky mood. That happened today, and I left the following review on Amazon for the “Trumpy Bear With Flag:”

    The cats didn’t like it.

    I got the Trumpy bear because we’re old and retired and love Trump. The first thing it did was beat up on my 2 black cats, then it left us to go live with our neighbor across the street who has a Russian Blue. If you’re a cat owner, make sure you have a safe cat for Trumpy Bear.”

    It’s now live. I can’t wait to see how many folks find my thoughtful review helpful.

    • nightmoth

      Good for you! Satirical reviews on Amazon are the BEST! I’ll never forget reading the “3 Wolves Moon t-shirt” for the first time.

      • Ms.MLG on Maui

        The Bic Pens for Women reviews almost killed me.

        • SkinlessGenderlessMan

          I’ll have to go check it out. In the meantime, may I suggest the reviews of Haribo Sugar Free Gummy Bears, 5lb. Bag.

          Pee first.

      • Marion in Savannah

        Go thou and do likewise!

    • BadKitty904

      “Wrong flag. Mine arrived holding an American flag instead of Russian.”

    • Andre

      I don’t even want to know what the Trumpy Bear would do to a Persian. Waterboarding at a minimum.

      • Marion in Savannah

        Or… worse… (Sorry, I do love Persian kitties.)

    • Meccalopolis

      Franklin would destroy that thing in ten minutes. Can’t wait to see one at the thrift store

      • SkinlessGenderlessMan

        Video when you do….

  • Saxo the Grammarian

    Mrs. Grammarian and I each donated $25 to Doug Jones.

    You have *one* job, Alabama…

  • Prollynottoday

    Sorry if this has already been said somewhere. Latest poll: For the tax bill 29%. Against is 49%. 22% say “what tax bill?” And Trump approval is 35%.

    • Mehmeisterjr

      So Putin is The Decider.

    • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

      The 22% are the ones who only pay attention to the news when some celebrity kicks, yes?

      • Kryptonian Canis

        Don’t forget about nip-slips!

    • Gosala

      Makes no never mind as long as the Republicans in office continue to play lap dogs to their big money donors.

    • theCryptofishist

      Hey, he’s outpolling the tax bill! Winning!

  • Jeffocaster in the East

    Did I ever mention that Trump is a fuckface? Also, Roy Moore. All the fundamentalists who are voting for him. Paul Ryan….that’s a good one. Mitch McDICKFACE McConnell. True fuckface. ah….I could go on and on.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Ana, come over to our side–we have cookies!

    https://twitter.com/ananavarro/status/938043855869546497

    • Gosala

      And those cakes we like

    • Kryptonian Canis

      Psst, third party! Peel away the sane votes so the GOP wins nothing and dies.

    • BadKitty904

      OK. Do something about it.

  • ken_kukec

    “Look, send Doug Jones money. He won’t embarrass Alabama — or at least, might prevent Alabama from embarrassing itself. Lord knows they need help in that area.”

    Good to know the spirit of Ms. Ivins is still with us.

  • WilbyToad

    Sexual politics is getting a bit wiggy… but we should respect him, he’s set his boundaries.
    https://youtu.be/dr7GUKoViGs
    Dec 5, 2017

    Chairman of the Pa. House State Government Committee Rep. Daryl Metcalfe overreacts to a gesture by Democratic Chairman Matt Bradford, by disparaging Democratic members and gay people.

    • BadKitty904

      Pissy lil’ snowflake, ain’t he?

      • WilbyToad

        My neighbor has a grumpy dog just like him.

        • BadKitty904

          Bet both of ’em smell when they’re wet.

    • Dr. Jo

      The (closeted?) lord doth protest too much, methinks.

    • altleftjohn

      Gay germs!

    • wide_stance_hubby

      He don’t want no male touch on him that he didn’t pay for.

      Unless there is some history of bad touching, Miss Piss here is an idiot.

  • memzilla Ω
  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • weighmaster

      AW dangit! I have to wait till I get home to watch it :(

  • memzilla Ω
  • IdRatherBeDancing

    Lol. I remember when the polls showed Gillespie and Northam as neck and neck. Of course, Alabama is way more screwy than Virginia, so there is that. But Jones is a damned good Dem … but again Alabama.

    • Yeah. I never sweated VA and I am telling you we are not taking Alabama. It will of course be all the Dems fault somehow, despite /Alabama.
      If we do I will personally, right here on Wonkette, in all caps go “IWASWRONGSOWRONG”
      Mark that

      • UncleTravelingMatt

        Dems in disarray as Jones fails to capitalize on negative media coverage of Franken and Conyers.

      • IdRatherBeDancing

        Deal. Ya. It’s Alabammy, but Northam won bigly — maybe it will be a close Jones is a good candidate.

        • VA hates Gillespie. I really cannot stress that enough. He lost like 4 times here.
          Carpet bagger from the north doncha know. Ralph was at stationed in Norfolk or VA beach (forgit which, too lazy to look it up).

          • IdRatherBeDancing

            I know. I live in the Peoples Republic of Arlington :)

          • HOW DO NEIGHBOR!
            Did you about jizz yourself election night? I was all day “Wait for NoVa” and then…we did not even have to wait for NoVa! And I was all….BWAAAHHH
            Now if we could get our lege settled

          • IdRatherBeDancing

            I was stoked!!!! The Saturday before the vote I had my toenails painted blue (somewhere I have a photo) and had a good fuck session immediately before I voted. so, it was a good Tuesday for me, lol.

      • Notreelyhelping

        We win either way: either Jones wins or Moore wins and the GOP is stuck with El Creepo.

      • NorthernSaber

        I’ll join you, but I think you’re right. At this point I think the last of those decrepit old cracker fucks will vote for the pedophile out of simple spite.

  • Spurning Beer

    I just ordered me two tickets to Donald J. Trump’s show in Pensacola on Friday. You can get them at donaldjtrump.com, two per customer.

    I live just a few miles outside Pensacola, so I’ll only have to not travel a short distance to not use my tickets. Other Wonkocrats who want to order tickets to not use should keep in mind you may need to not travel farther.

    This is the most conservative congressional district in Florida, and the 15th most conservative in the country. I’m sure there will be plenty of demand for the tickets, but I cherish the idea of organizers being thrilled by the ticket reservations, then dismayed by the empty seats.

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    My brother-in-law just called to tell me he bought some land. We walked over it last summer, and part of it was lousy with morels. He said he saw some chanterelles this fall. First good news I’ve heard all day.

    • BadKitty904

      If he has any chicken-of-the-woods, I’m there!

      • UncleTravelingMatt

        I didn’t see any. Do they grow on ponderosa or tamarack?

        • They grow from eggs, no?

          • BadKitty904

            Umm…

        • BadKitty904

          They grow on oaks Down Here, but I do know they also grow on firs and some other evergreens…

    • therblig

      and the story of the morel is…

      • theCryptofishist

        Aminita a bigger hint than that.

        • wide_stance_hubby

          Death cap libelz!

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Oh my.

      I’m terribly jealous.

      • UncleTravelingMatt

        I left out the best part. The mushroom fields are less than 200 yards from bil’s “cabin.” So, pick a few mushrooms, retire to the sauna, hit the hot tub . . .

        • Carpe Vagenda

          sniff.

    • Hemp Dogbane

      Lately it’s lousy morals all the way down.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • hudson

      why should he attend?

      • therblig

        they need to freshen up the bigot exhibit.

    • OutOfOrbit

      i can just imagine the maniacal tweet that is ripping around in tRumperster’s bowels right no trying to get out and flame the NAACP

    • Persistent Demme

      Live by the sword, die by the sword, Trumplethinskin!
      (You can’t have it both ways, you know.)

  • Bub, the cynical zombie
    • Me not sure

      Well…isn’t that precious!

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Snorted.

  • Michael R

    If anyone wants a rock break …
    ( will not leave you saying ” needs more maracas ” )

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EL3pP29N-Wc

  • Bub, the cynical zombie

    Happy time courtesy of Dok Zoom’s Twitter feed:
    https://twitter.com/vaneciaruiz/status/937496000284958720

    • theCryptofishist

      When it comes to separating the sheep from the goats… Why would anyone want to be a sheep–goats have more fun.

      • Prollynottoday

        Goats are smart. Sheep are really dumb.

    • nightmoth

      Thx! Pyrs are the BEST!

    • TJ Barke

      Great Pyrenees has no fucks to give.

      • Meccalopolis

        Is that what that is? Looks big

    • Tiffany de Houston

      I’ve owned four Great Pyrenees in my life. They are awesome!

    • Persistent Demme

      Awww…
      A Great Pyrenees.
      A great protector.
      God help anyone who tries to mess with those goats!

    • Persistent Demme

      Awww…
      A Great Pyrenees.
      A great protector.
      God help anyone who tries to mess with those goats!

  • keinsignal

    For those of you feeling a little defeated or overwhelmed by recent events, here’s something to maybe get you in a better frame of mind…
    https://youtu.be/5goBGXUVKkk

    “How many times do we have to win/
    til you realize we are not lost yet?”

  • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

    How were you not prepared? It’s not like this happens every year! (One of my orders is caught in the bottleneck. I may get it Saturday.)

    https://twitter.com/CNN/status/938178683227000836

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      It happens when your drivers are part-time?

      • theCryptofishist

        And keep quitting when they get better jobs?
        Okay, that was a joke, there are no better jobs. Maybe they all got the flu.

    • Joe Beese

      When I first read the assertion that Sex and the City was a gay man’s fantasy, I withheld judgment. Then it did an episode about the iconic hotness of UPS deliverymen.

    • Prollynottoday

      That modern new fangled comptotor tubes webinz done fukided it alls up. Who knew delivering boxes was so complicated ?

  • Covfefe

    Least Roy understands The First Rule of Holes.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Stay away from old ones?

      • Covfefe

        Quit digging.

  • You may occasionally see a video entitled something like “Drunk Lady Sings 12 Days of Christmas”. In honor of Repeal Day, here’s a live performance by the original artist, Fay McKay:
    The Twelve Daze of Christmas
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zjFMBsppBVc

    Repeal Day honors the day the 21st Amendment was ratified, repealing Prohibition.
    http://repealday.org/

  • La forza del resistino

    Picture yourself as a 17 y/o picking up your date and she wants to introduce you to her Dad. Do you run or just confess to every wrong deed you ever did cuz you know he already knows after one look at you. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/2b58ee14abcdb837da741fa64280fa35cd5cd3d57539eab49ea18846bc6116a7.jpg

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    And since I saw a DB spokesperson say in a news report that the bank complies with all requests from legal investigators in all countries…

    https://twitter.com/SethAbramson/status/938180573880836096

    • Joe Beese

      They’d certainly be furnishing Mueller with evidence of their complicity in (yet more) money laundering. So they might have… reservations.

      • Resistance Fighter Callyson

        Aw crap. I should have thought of that.

        Here’s hoping they’re as incompetent and arrogant as Donald is and hand it over anyway!

    • Rebel Scum with permit

      Technically there are punishments for banks that don’t comply with US banking law, but given that some of them have set up the equivalent of express teller lines for drug money launderers those penalties are pretty meaningless.

  • theCryptofishist

    So, I’m curious… I don’t follow alt-Nazi thought churning much, but I found myself wondering if there’s been any sort of “eco-eugenics,” claiming not simply that the aryans should out breed everyone else, but also that everyone else should be prevented from breeding (illicit contraception implants, death camps, or whatever else works?

    Or is “eco” already too much real science for them?

    • Carpe Vagenda

      That’s not eco-eugenics. That’s eugenics. And Fred Trump was a believer.

      Imagine if he’d been willing to admit his kid needed a shrink.

      • theCryptofishist

        So they don’t use eco as a cover for eugenics, is I guess what I wanted to say. Somehow it sounded more possible as I rolled home from minor shopping this afternoon.

        • Carpe Vagenda

          No, I hear what you’re saying, but the horrifying thing is that the whole white folks must breed thing they’re pimping now is exactly the same thing that produced the chinless bunny-toothed cognitively-impaired examples of the master race in the White House.

          • theCryptofishist

            Well, maybe if they actually were better people, they wouldn’t have to invent that master race shit. Not that this hasn’t been noted before.

    • Very sure that is a yes and it is the death camps or whatever as a solution

    • Rebel Scum with permit

      It seems like the default position of the New Nazi or Nazi Lite is that they don’t want to kill off other ethnic groups- they just don’t want them around, and don’t care where they go. Antarctica would be ok.

    • Red Bird

      Why? Are you thinking of joining them?

      • theCryptofishist

        No. I guess my mind just churns too much and weird shit floats to the top.

  • BMW
  • nightmoth
  • CW

    Roy Moore’s cowboy outfit looks like something a male prostitute would wear.

  • BadKitty904

    Since we’re talking about Roy “Prevert” Moore…

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ud9zBKJJQe4

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Can you cut a bitch, Paul Krugman of the NYT?

    Somehow, I don’t think limiting spending on booze, women, and movies (movies?) is going to be sufficient for the median American household — which had an income of $59,000 last year — to end up with a $22 million estate. And if you think of people who really will benefit from eliminating taxes on inheritance — people like, say, Donald Trump Jr. — one is not immediately struck by the notion that this is a reward for their fathers’ abstemious lifestyles.

    Zing!

    • Marion in Savannah

      But he’s, you know, SHRILL.

    • Ryan Denniston

      Krugman doesn’t mention the ObamaPhones and crab legs. I mean, an annual supply would save a family, what, $10k right there!

  • Joe Beese

    Charles Pierce:

    People who believe that the president* is a dealmaking genius—or, more precisely, the people who are paid to tell him they believe it—likely will see this move as a clever ploy to shock both sides into serious negotiations. Sensible people, however, will see this move as a man who fingerpaints with botulism. World leaders, of course, are basically aghast. Even Jared Kushner’s new pals, the Saudis, consider this a reckless idea.

    • Marion in Savannah

      Where/when was that and how did I miss it? Linky?

    • DainBramage

      Trump: Maybe a new war in the Middle East will save me.

  • Zach Williams

    OPEN THREAD TIME YAY
    So, thing to get this off my chest!
    I finished the original Fate/stay night anime last night and GOD DAMN THAT ENDING WAS SO PERFECTGOD THE FEELS
    I WAS ON THE VERGE OF DITCHING ALL MASCULINITY AND FUCKING BAWLING MY EYES OUT WHEN SABER DIED AT THE END.
    SERIOUSLY THIS ONE FUCKING SCENE WAS JUST SO AMAZINGLY WRITTEN OH MY GOD-
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/2759df1d06b1d95371e157096eaa29b43133668cadff2c5a6c26c6516d630b90.jpg

    • hudson

      #1/1. it’s ok to bawl/cry.
      #2. it’s how you react to a situation that bothers you so much is what determines your calibre.
      #3. having just betrayed my age. stay off my lawn.

    • janecita

      I cried when my gay boyfriend died in “Akame Ga Kill.”

    • Meccalopolis

      Is it on Netflix?

      • Zach Williams

        Not the original ’06 one.
        But they’ve got Fate/Zero (Prequel) Fate/stay night – Unlimited Blade Works (Alternate route) and Fate/Apocrypha (Dumpster fire)

        • Meccalopolis

          Thanks!

          • Zach Williams

            No prob!

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸
    • OutOfOrbit

      mug shot ? humm

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Holly

    Detest. Scorn. Contempt. Disdain. Despise. Loathe. Abhor. Execrate. Words that now define the GOP. I’m sure there are more so please feel free to add your own to the list.

  • Bill D. Burger
    • Marion in Savannah

      Afuckingmen. Twice. That’s the God’s Gospel Truth. Take it from someone who’s lived here for 37 years.

      • Good_Gawd_Yall

        Me too. Kentucky for 49 years. Some days I can hardly believe I didn’t escape while I was still young enough to be welcomed to sanctuary elsewhere.

        • Marion in Savannah

          Well, I’m tottering on the brink of 72, so I wasn’t born and raised here. Which is probably why I’m a raving liberal!

    • Prollynottoday

      Needz moar WVA, southern IN and southern OH.

  • WilbyToad

    The International Olympic Committee on Tuesday banned Russia from participating in the 2018 Winter Olympics in South Korea because of what is being described as an intricate doping scheme.

    https://twitter.com/TheDailyEdge/status/938121169009594368

    • BadKitty904

      That would explain a lot about the Traitor-in-Chief.

    • Zach Williams

      That’s why you don’t cheat the system.
      Of course, next thing you know Amerika will try that shit too.

    • BJW

      Oh, I thought it said “DOPE” scheme!

  • Joe Beese
    • Rebel Scum with permit

      It doesn’t work. They always pick a smallish venue and oversell tickets to make sure that the seats are filled up with True Believers™

      • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

        Pensacola Bay Center – seating capacity: 10,000.
        It’s his third stop at this facility (he held a rally there during the GOP Primary and during the general election).

      • alpacapunchbowl

        A colleague showed me a photo from one of these shitshows that her mom’s friend posted on fb. It was a smallish venue somewhere in Ohio, and less than half of the floor seats were occupied – even after they used a big chunk of the footprint to set up the stage.

    • Marion in Savannah

      “Please clap.”

    • tehbaddr

      Rally for what? Moneys! Shithead just keeps on campaigning and grifting!

    • Holly

      These “rallies” are so awesome and fun. When The Giant Orange Fucktater and his narcissistic personality needs to be stroked they throw one of these fabulously wild fascist Nazi parties where you will more than likely get punched in the head. Sounds like fun to me.

      • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

        Was it the last one where he called NFL players “sons of bitches” and told the NFL to start firing them?

        • Holly

          I do believe you’re right. How fun is this guy?

  • Amelia Resists and Persists

    Somehow I had convinced myself that the Alabama election was today, and that tonight the fucking Moore-pocalypse would be over one way or the other, but I still have another week of watching what hope I had left in human decency wither and die.

    I think I’m just gonna go read for a while. Have fun, Wonketariet.

  • Meccalopolis

    I am holding out hope thatno statewouldsend a child molester to the senate

    • Marion in Savannah

      It’s Aladamnbama…

      • BadKitty904

        *sigh*

      • Meccalopolis

        Word

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      You mean no state other than South Carolina?

      • Meccalopolis

        Ouch. Mom’s side is from Florence. While I have some fond memories itpains me you may be right. Although many left sc fir Alabama prior to the war in a massive land grab

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

      is anyone surprised?

      • gallbladder

        You mean, aside from Collins?

    • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

      Geez, she’s looking more and more like a sucker every day.

      • Joe Beese

        Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) made a commitment to Sen. Susan Collins (R-Maine) that he would support passage of two bipartisan ObamaCare bills before the end of the year, a promise that helped win her vote for tax reform.

        Did he also promise not to [well-known vulgar false promise from boys to their dates]?

    • Iron Monkey

      Collins you are such an immoral idiot. As if you didn’t see this coming.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Hey, she did her best. I don’t see why this should change her vote. The promise is more important than the execution.

    • Ryan Denniston

      Burn Collins. BURN!!

    • Notreelyhelping

      Do they need 51 after the bills go to conference? (Assuming the House and Senate can actually agree on a bill.)

  • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

    Something good… A rapper and an 81-year-old woman just met in person after bonding over Words With Friends for more than a year https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/inspired-life/wp/2017/12/04/a-rapper-and-retiree-bonded-over-words-with-friends-after-more-than-a-year-they-met-in-real-life/?tid=sm_tw&utm_term=.038f04c1c607

    • WomanInThePersistence

      What a nice thing! Thanks.

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        With the relentless shit stream, I need reminders about the normal people in the world.

        • WomanInThePersistence

          I just got home from work. It’s almost unsettling to start my time here with a genuine smile.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Tell me, Roy, where does the Bible say lying is OK if it’s done during a political campaign?

    https://twitter.com/Josh_Moon/status/938140424555978757

    https://twitter.com/MooreSenate/status/937399268230430720

    • miss_grundy

      Well, Alabamans like their abortions to be illegal so that if something goes wrong, they can blame the woman for getting one.

    • janecita

      I work at PP, we don’t fucking announce our abortion services on our doors! Assholes!

    • hudson

      things that bother me are grown up adults preying on kids. and fuckers like you vilifying innocent people with your unsubstantiated insinuations with all that bathroom scaremongering..

  • aureolaborealis

    Needs more uncanny valley dancing marionettes!

    https://youtu.be/PgQhE7n8WYo

    • Zach Williams

      Saw that on Twitter.
      Fanny pack tourist needs to fuck off though.

    • NotALiar

      I love how happy she is doing this

      • Impatient

        Oh, yeah, right. The taller lady is good too.

      • Impatient

        Oh, yeah, right. The taller lady is good too.

    • tehbaddr

      And I thought Puppeteering was a lost art! Oh, yeah, right.

  • Thiazin Red

    Based on his statements it looks like Kennedy is going to side with the homophobes, so look forward to seeing whites only signs in the near future.

  • NotALiar

    How the fuck is he going to be a god damn mother fucking shit ass child molesting senator without having a single debate?? That is horse shit and he should fuck all the way off.

    • BadKitty904

      Well, yes, there is that…

      • NotALiar

        It’s the least of his fucking awfulness but it still pisses me off.

    • Jeffocaster in the East

      yeah…what this person said!!!!!!!

    • Marion in Savannah

      As I said earlier to a different post, it’s Aladamnbama.

      • NotALiar

        Ugh I know but I have faith. Some of the best punk/rock n roll shows I’ve ever played were in Birmingham. There are some really fucking cool people in Alabama. Their parents/grandparents are the awful ones.

  • Kiri the Unicorn
    • NotALiar

      They should go play a free stadium show in support for Jones.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Ryan Denniston

      Relocate to California. It’s Alabama Jake.

    • hudson

      rofl!! when the world thinks of first class education it thinks of alabama. rofl.

      • Resistance Fighter Callyson

        Well, he said he wants that for Alabama, not that the state has it.

        And there are decent people everywhere, including Alabama, so good for him for fighting the good fight at least.

        • hudson

          and he is the flag waving mascot for that?

          • hudson

            for enlightenment, progress and foward thinking?

      • Ryan Denniston

        It’s not far fetched. NC had this kind of reputation before the current crop of chowderheads took over.

    • biologydave

      And that’s why Alabama won’t elect him.

  • Ryan Denniston

    As long as we have Florida Man, Alabama can rest easy in the embarrassment department.

  • Zach Williams

    So, Antorus finally opened up to me on WoW today!
    Finished the first wing, and I’m one step closer to the end of the Legion! https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/71f4b0bdd56401f49d8f797cae8d0366383f889f4a500aa71e6b7aa57fd6fe9a.png

    • Joe Beese

      The hours that Mrs. Beese has spent in the World would probably have been enough for her to become proficient on a musical instrument.

      I don’t Get It. But then I’ve never played well with others.

      • Zach Williams

        I don’t play well with others either.
        I probably woulda had it done when it came out on Normal difficulty but I can’t keep a group organized to save my life.
        Thankfully, Raid Finder turns these raids from challenging, tactical marathons into “hit everything really fucking hard.”

  • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef
    • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

      Maybe he’ll end up like Conyers and be pushed out.

    • TJ Barke

      FFFS!

  • BadKitty904

    Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes,
    ‘Twas his intent,
    To blow up King and Parliament…

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RgZmFyJdloQ

    • Joe Beese

      You know nothing, Guy Fawkes.

    • Thiazin Red

      Oh Jon Snow you are handsome, but not so good at acting.

      • BadKitty904

        When you’re that pretty, “acting” can be redundant.

  • mrFawkes
    • Joe Beese

      Well… hello, Katrín Jakobsdóttir!

      • Impatient

        Is it a bad thing, that I would vote for her without knowing her policies … or what she’s running for?

    • TJ Barke

      Why are women subject to patronyms? Shouldn’t they have matronyms?

      • Courser_Resistance

        Generally they are matronyms in Iceland, but I’ve heard it’s complicated.

        • TJ Barke

          No, matronyms are apparently uncommon, and the default is patronyms.

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        Ministress? Minestyrius? Minisdame?…

      • marxalot

        Some do, actually. Matronyms are not entirely uncommon in Iceland, but it isn’t entirely straightforward; they’re used in more than just cases of no father of record, but not used for all girl children.

    • Nounverb911

      “The new prime minister of Iceland is Katrín Jakobsdóttir, a very capable woman.”
      /FIFY

    • spangled
    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Iceland is stupid! They don’t have any backwoods child molesters running for gubmint.

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Iceland is stupid! They don’t have any backwoods child molesters running for gubmint.

    • Fartknocker

      She’s nice. Plus I like her scarf.

  • Joe Beese
    • capnkrunch

      Bitcoin was an interesting experiment and I actually like the concept of a private financial transactions. However, in practice it has been a disaster. It doesn’t live up to any high minded ideals; all it does is facilitate crime. Getting rid of bitcoin would almost single-handedly neuter the ransomware problem. It would harm online drug, weapons, and child pornography trade. Literally only good things would come of bitcoin just going away forever.

      • WeaselPoo

        I’ve noticed on craigslist in the NJ/NY area a lot of cryptocurrency mining rigs now up for sale by owners. Presumably their hardware investments aren”t ‘earning’ their keep any more. (They cost $6 to $10 grand).

      • CripesAmighty

        It’s not really a ‘currency’ anymore but abubblicious trading vehicle: rocketed from 600 to 10 grand in the last year. Could keep going, but the bust is gonna be spectacular when it happens.

    • CripesAmighty
    • CripesAmighty
    • CripesAmighty
  • Marceline

    Whatever happens with this race, I have been amazed by the campaign Doug Jones has run. Whenever some wannabe strategist claims Dems “don’t have a message” or “we can’t just run on being against Trump” I’m going to punch them in the throat then tell them to look at the campaign Doug Jones ran and STFU.

    • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

      Oh, hell yes.

  • anon_the_great

    Whodda thunk a pedo would go all snowflake an shit.

  • The Wanderer

    I thought I had a vision of The Winslow today. I wonder what it might portend.

    https://static.comicvine.com/uploads/scale_small/8/88853/1655401-buck20090312.jpg

  • ltmcdies

    OT…. for Canuckistan wonketteers, history nerds … a the story of the largest man made pre nuclear explosion which 100 years ago tomorrow
    http://www.ctvnews.ca/mobile/canada/halifax-explosion-commemoration-to-recognize-hero-of-tragedy-vince-coleman-1.3708572

    • The Wanderer

      Yep, the Halifax Explosion. Cracked the seabed directly under the Mont Blanc.

    • That was one of my favourite Heritage Minutes when i was a kid

    • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

      JFC, never heard about this. Amazing and awful.

    • NorthernSaber

      Followed the next day by a blizzard, because who doesn’t need a train-stopping blizzard in the aftermath of the largest man-made pre nuclear explosion?

  • TundraGrifter

    The soccer coach down in Florida who ran off with the 17-year old girl – can he run for the US Senate from Alabama?

    • Impatient

      He DOES have the required experience!

  • Michael R
    • TJ Barke

      How fucking dare he?

    • Ryan Denniston

      Younger tail? Or slimmer statutes of limitation?

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Ryan Denniston

      Mr. Moore, Facebook is working to fix you up!

      http://www.bbc.com/news/technology-42232475

    • wide_stance_hubby

      Needs [alot] moore sit the hell down and shut the fuck up.

    • Zonath

      “Judge” Moore is more of a James Blake than a Rosa Parks…

    • Zonath

      “Judge” Moore is more of a James Blake than a Rosa Parks…

    • Bill D. Burger

      “The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose.
      An evil soul producing holy witness
      Is like a villain with a smiling cheek,
      A goodly apple rotten at the heart.
      O, what a goodly outside falsehood hath!”

      ___From: The Merchant of Venice

    • SayItWithWookies

      This from the asshole who thinks women shouldn’t be allowed to vote?! I don’t think Parks meant to include people who wanted to prevent others from making the world a better place.

    • SayItWithWookies

      This from the asshole who thinks women shouldn’t be allowed to vote?! I don’t think Parks meant to include people who wanted to prevent others from making the world a better place.

    • Bill D. Burger

      “The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose.
      An evil soul producing holy witness
      Is like a villain with a smiling cheek,
      A goodly apple rotten at the heart.
      O, what a goodly outside falsehood hath!”

      ___From: The Merchant of Venice

    • Bill D. Burger

      “The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose.
      An evil soul producing holy witness
      Is like a villain with a smiling cheek,
      A goodly apple rotten at the heart.
      O, what a goodly outside falsehood hath!”

      ___From: The Merchant of Venice

    • SayItWithWookies

      This from the asshole who thinks women shouldn’t be allowed to vote?! I don’t think Parks meant to include people who wanted to prevent others from making the world a better place.

    • Bill D. Burger

      “The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose.
      An evil soul producing holy witness
      Is like a villain with a smiling cheek,
      A goodly apple rotten at the heart.
      O, what a goodly outside falsehood hath!”

      ___From: The Merchant of Venice

      • Michael R

        Yes , that’s him !

    • Zonath

      “Judge” Moore is more of a James Blake than a Rosa Parks…

    • SkinlessGenderlessMan

      Whatthafuck??

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • hudson

      grand old pedos.
      party over politics.

      nothing else but mere opportunists. don’t even pretend.

  • Nounverb911
  • BadKitty904

    Aight, time to start supper – a cheese’n’spinach strata. You chirren sing wassail or some such…

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZEmyno_FK6M

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    Hooray! My little town of 80,000 now has a group of assholes “patrolling” for homeless people sleeping in the downtown business district!

    • Who watches the assholes?

      • UncleTravelingMatt

        The cops? The PD here on the Idaho side of the river is not overly pleased. On the Washington side, they don’t say much. There hasn’t been any violence, yet.

      • Nounverb911

        Their mothers?

      • KnaveOfSwords

        It’s assholes all the way down.

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        Steve Buscemi.

      • KnaveOfSwords

        It’s assholes all the way down.

    • h4rr4r

      To connect them with resources they might need?

    • h4rr4r

      To connect them with resources they might need?

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      What are they planning to do to them when they find them? Give them sleeping bags, and food?

      • UncleTravelingMatt

        Close, but you’re way off.

    • tehbaddr

      So if they find some they’ll take them in or help them find shelter. right?

    • h4rr4r

      To connect them with resources they might need?

    • h4rr4r

      To connect them with resources they might need?

    • TJ Barke

      Do they shout “Trump Heil!” When they do it?

    • tehbaddr

      #MAGA!

    • tehbaddr

      You should really post a link to whomever organized this sort of cleansing!

      • UncleTravelingMatt

        I only found out about it from reading police dispatch logs and then asking a cop what an unusual notation was referring to. I doubt they have a website.

        • tehbaddr

          OK, so the cops are on it. They’ll be arresting anyone who harasses the homeless then.

  • I have to go to a work event tonight (feel the excitement). Someone have Ron text me if everythung turns into a Tuesday night massacre

    • Joe Beese

      I trust the New York Times app to ping me when something genuinely newsworthy happens. I mean, it won’t bother you just because Diddy changed his name again.

  • Angela Ruzzo

    This is too funny to keep to myself.Disney Illustrator Combines Star Wars And Calvin & Hobbes, And The Result Is Adorable
    https://www.boredpanda.com/calvin-hobbes-star-wars-drawings-brian-kesinger/
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d2a0d0f74b5fcdb590b7a766ff9248d0a8e2cb1e098fc3105ee639ab246035cf.jpg

  • Angela Ruzzo

    This is too funny to keep to myself.Disney Illustrator Combines Star Wars And Calvin & Hobbes, And The Result Is Adorable
    https://www.boredpanda.com/calvin-hobbes-star-wars-drawings-brian-kesinger/
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d2a0d0f74b5fcdb590b7a766ff9248d0a8e2cb1e098fc3105ee639ab246035cf.jpg

  • Angela Ruzzo

    This is too funny to keep to myself.Disney Illustrator Combines Star Wars And Calvin & Hobbes, And The Result Is Adorable
    https://www.boredpanda.com/calvin-hobbes-star-wars-drawings-brian-kesinger/
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d2a0d0f74b5fcdb590b7a766ff9248d0a8e2cb1e098fc3105ee639ab246035cf.jpg

    • Gosala

      Not just you. Disqus is telling me it’s down for maintenance, yet comments keep popping up.

      ¿did this post?

      Oops, replied to wrong comment.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        And of course I tried to post six times and it never showed up and then it showed up six times. I really need to learn to be more patient. I’ve been saying that for 60 years, why can’t I hurry up and learn to be patient god dammit!!!!!

  • Angela Ruzzo

    This is too funny to keep to myself.Disney Illustrator Combines Star Wars And Calvin & Hobbes, And The Result Is Adorable
    https://www.boredpanda.com/calvin-hobbes-star-wars-drawings-brian-kesinger/
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d2a0d0f74b5fcdb590b7a766ff9248d0a8e2cb1e098fc3105ee639ab246035cf.jpg

  • amrak63

    Is the governor of Pennsylvania a Rethug? If he is, maybe he can pardon Jerry Sandusky (if I recall the name correctly) to run for Senator from PA next time.

  • Ryan Denniston

    So, if I am following this correctly, it’s Trump’s lawyers that concoct all the batshit crazy tweets? Are these the people you want working for you?

  • Angela Ruzzo

    This is too funny to keep to myself.Disney Illustrator Combines Star Wars And Calvin & Hobbes, And The Result Is Adorable
    https://www.boredpanda.com/calvin-hobbes-star-wars-drawings-brian-kesinger/
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d2a0d0f74b5fcdb590b7a766ff9248d0a8e2cb1e098fc3105ee639ab246035cf.jpg

  • Ryan Denniston

    So, if I am following this correctly, it’s Trump’s lawyers that concoct all the batshit crazy tweets? Are these the people you want working for you?

  • h4rr4r

    Disqus seems fucky

  • Angela Ruzzo
  • Ryan Denniston

    So, if I am following this correctly, it’s Trump’s lawyers that concoct all the batshit crazy tweets? Are these the people you want working for you?

  • Nounverb911
  • WilbyToad

    LGBTQ rights just had a horrible day in the Supreme Court

    There are almost certainly five votes for the anti-gay cake baker Jack Phillips.

    There’s no way to sugarcoat the oral arguments in Masterpiece Cakeshop v. Civil Rights Commission, a landmark Supreme Court case asking whether a religious baker who objects to same-sex marriages is allowed to defy Colorado’s anti-discrimination law. Justice Anthony Kennedy, the key swing vote and the only conservative on the Court who has shown much sympathy for LGBTQ rights, appears almost certain to side with Jack Phillips, the baker in this case.

    Though there is a chance that Kennedy could side with Phillips on narrow grounds, Masterpiece Cakeshop could potentially give religious conservatives sweeping power to engage in discrimination.

    by IAN MILLHISER / THINKPROGRESS
    https://thinkprogress.org/lgbtq-rights-horrible-day-scotus-e189ca49c6c3/

    Not happy news, but an important read. The Court has always been the biggest flaw in the argument that Trump is a temporary aberration. We are stuck with these decisions long term, and they impact real lives, beginning now.

  • Ryan Denniston

    So, if I am following this correctly, it’s Trump’s lawyers that concoct all the batshit crazy tweets? Are these the people you want working for you?

  • WilbyToad

    LGBTQ rights just had a horrible day in the Supreme Court

    There are almost certainly five votes for the anti-gay cake baker Jack Phillips.

    There’s no way to sugarcoat the oral arguments in Masterpiece Cakeshop v. Civil Rights Commission, a landmark Supreme Court case asking whether a religious baker who objects to same-sex marriages is allowed to defy Colorado’s anti-discrimination law. Justice Anthony Kennedy, the key swing vote and the only conservative on the Court who has shown much sympathy for LGBTQ rights, appears almost certain to side with Jack Phillips, the baker in this case.

    Though there is a chance that Kennedy could side with Phillips on narrow grounds, Masterpiece Cakeshop could potentially give religious conservatives sweeping power to engage in discrimination.

    by IAN MILLHISER / THINKPROGRESS
    https://thinkprogress.org/lgbtq-rights-horrible-day-scotus-e189ca49c6c3/

    Not happy news, but an important read. The Court has always been the biggest flaw in the argument that Trump is a temporary aberration. We are stuck with these decisions long term, and they impact real lives, beginning now.

    • TJ Barke

      Fucking sanctimonious god botherers.

    • h4rr4r

      Sounds like it is time to found a new religion.

    • Thiazin Red

      There should be a pool on how long it takes for someone to bring a case saying that serving black people is against their religion.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        And the mormons will kick themselves for not holding out just a little bit longer.

    • SDGeoff3

      We’re fucked.

    • Andre

      Sooooooo, Dredd Scott 2.0

    • jesterpunk

      But on the bright side Susan Sarandon and the purity ponies are happy they didnt have to sully their conscience and vote for Hillary.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Hey, look on twitter. The ‘left’ are attacking Doug Jones _right now_ as an unexciting candidate who’s what’s wrong with the Democrats.

        • jesterpunk

          Why am I not surprised?

  • Nounverb911
  • Angela Ruzzo
  • tehbaddr

    Disqus particularly borked tonight, or is it just me and my Chromebook? I’ve rebooted at least twice in the last 1/2 hour!

  • amrak63

    Is the governor of Pennsylvania a Rethug? If he is, maybe he can pardon Jerry Sandusky (if I recall the name correctly) to run for Senator from PA next time.

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      He’s a Dem: PA voters wised up and kicked out the GOP governor they elected in 2010 four years later.

      • amrak63

        Good for them!

      • jesterpunk

        We might wind up electing another republican though because republicans keep making things worse then blaming democrats for it.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
  • Zach Williams

    Doug Jones: *Points out pedophilia and gun-humping and general idiocy of Roy Moore*
    Roy Moore: https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/0f404eb52971586ef723fda5e44cbec6e6a666899decaf47fe7425b2626af358.png

  • SisterArtemis

    Can’t anyone read Moore’s tweets? as an anonymous use, at minimum?

    • Angela Ruzzo

      It is now working. If only Congress would do the same.

  • schmannity

    Florida Man literally strikes again.

    Miami man claims self-defense against a 5-year-old boy ‘armed’ with a tennis racket.

    http://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/crime/article188168274.html

    • Gosala

      What the article doesn’t tell you is that 5 year old is a grand master of the Shaolin Ninja Temple of Tennis Rackets of Death.

    • WilbyToad

      Well if he believed he was an insect, and perceived a bug zapper…

    • jesterpunk

      Wow ok, I read the comments and I really shouldn’t have. I fucking hate some people.

    • BearDeLaOursistance

      It’s like that tennis instructor thinks he’s a COP or something…

    • Joe Beese

      Deadly Backhand

      • schmannity

        No love.

  • TJ Barke

    Why is everyone quadruple posting?

  • janecita

    I don’t say this often enough, but ALL the women working for Trump are assholes.

    https://www.politico.com/story/2017/12/05/kellyanne-conway-me-too-sexual-harassment-281050

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      Kellyanne Conway said Tuesday that she had her own “Me too” moment in which she decried sexual harassment during the 2016 presidential election but that “nobody cared” due to her political views

      Funny how no one takes a supporter of Donald seriously on that subject, isn’t it?

      • SisterArtemis

        I have no doubt that she’s been harassed or worse, working with those assholes. And “nobody cared” might just be because no one wants to spend an ounce of energy on her that they could send towards someone they can actually tolerate. But I’ll say this, if she was harassed and/or assaulted (and odds are she was) that’s absolutely wrong, and proves she works among assholes. It does not prove that her attacks are ok with people on the outside.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        You mean the one where she threatened to out the serving Republican congressmen who molested her when she worked on the Hill if they didn’t shut up about pussy grabbing and then kept her mouth shut so they could keep doing it?

        Fuck her.

      • janecita

        At this point, I wouldn’t spit on any of them if they were on fire.

    • OutOfOrbit

      That is unrationally gentle

      • janecita

        I’m trying to be less of a bitch. It’s hard work though.

        • Resistance Fighter Callyson

          I gave up on that on November 9, 2017.

          • janecita

            That was also my turning point. I’ve become a bitter, pessimistic, quite verbal bitch.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      Kellyanne says “she decried sexual harassment during the 2016 presidential election but that ‘nobody cared’ due to her political views.” I got news for you Kellyanne, nobody cared because you are a pathologically lying ass-kissing sociopathic fascist moron, not JUST because of your political views.

  • amrak63

    Disqus is suqqing qamel qoqqs again.

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      I’m not the only one then? Good to know.

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        Wait, is this some kind of admission of camelidae fetish?

        • OutOfOrbit

          Rool 34

    • Joe Beese

      For auto-updating my upvote count, I forgive it many sins.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Disqussing pugs with their filly mouths.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Well, until the Supreme Court decides he is above the law.

    • Joe Beese

      Dershowitz has been an asshole for at least 16 years. Fuck him.

    • La forza del resistino

      King Charles I took liberties with tax money and then Parliament went over his head.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        He ended up a little short.

  • Bill D. Burger

    Dear Mr. Satan:

    When disqus gets to hell, please open the blowers and ramp up the heat.

    Thank you in advance,
    Bill

    • Gosala

      Dear Bill,

      Already on it.

      Yours in Christ,
      Satan
      Beelzebub
      Father of Lies

      • Bill D. Burger

        I’m trusting, but still skeptical!

  • Nounverb911
  • schmannity
  • Nounverb911

    Will the Park Service start charging for prime viewing spots now?
    https://twitter.com/BeschlossDC/status/937835903346556928

  • Joe Beese

    Life In Customer Service means the occasional screamer. This one was having a real “french fried fit”, as Mrs. B likes to say.

    I try to imagine I’m a veterinarian dealing with an animal in pain. It can’t govern itself and it’s too stupid to know you’re trying to help.

    • TJ Barke

      Except in that case your tech can render appropriate restraint.

      • SisterArtemis

        I believe in just throwing a big towel over pretty much any animal in distress. Yes, I know it’s not the solution every time, but seems like it might come in handy in customer service.

  • AJ Milne

    It would be nice to imagine that somehow this would be a turning point. That as one, the benighted, suffering souls of Alabama who have returned Republican after Republican in such elections would look up, and say, waitaminnt, he’s a fucking _paedophile_, what the hell are we even doing, here? And also, every time these assholes say they’re gonna make things better and gawd will reward us for making them the chosen ones it winds up with their giving every damned red cent they can to rich, inbred plutocrats, and we still get fucked, same as always. Fuck it, we’ll take the liberal. Maybe we’ll get slightly less fucked, _and_, hey, at least any twelve year girls working in fast food in the vicinity of the Capitol Building will be a little safer, anyway…

    … and from there, it would build into a new enlightenment. A bit like the Scottish Enlightenment, except with more of a drawl, less of a burr, more t-shirts and John Deere hats, less kilts. And centuries from now, the wonders they would work would be remembered. A David Hume of Birmingham, a Robert Burns of Montgomery would write treatises and poems to echo through the ages…

    … sadly, sure, looks more like it’s just gonna be more ‘Welcome to ‘Bama, Don’t Roll Down Your Windows If You Have Young Children’ on the highway signs at the border. But, hey, was briefly nice to dream, anyway.

    • DrBigHead

      Never happen. It is clear that to way too many of them, liberals are worse than pedophiles. At least pedophiles, at least the one in question, is not pro choice. Nothing else matters.

      Except perhaps gun control

  • Michael R

    “ Look, I’m a heterosexual. I have a wife, I love my wife. ”

    https://youtu.be/dr7GUKoViGs

    • Joe Beese

      “I only watch men’s water polo for the athletic drama. You understand?”

    • Zach Williams

      Yeah…sure you do.
      Just join us in the land of the gays.
      We have awesome artists and actors.

    • Christopher Story

      Who are you trying to convince?

    • OrG

      GAYDAR! GAYDAR! GAYDAR!

      • Christopher Story

        Holy closeted homosexual Batman!

    • wide_stance_hubby

      “Look, I’m a heterosexual. I have a wife. I love my wife. Please be gentle with me”

    • wide_stance_hubby

      Love how the others hide their grinning faces.

    • Lamb Urgini
    • Andre

      In that sidebar, I’m gonna bet that the chair wanted to show off some of his wrestling moves….in the unitard…with a vat of KY on standby. Ladies and gentleman, your government in action

  • msanthropesmr

    So what happened today? Are we all still alive?

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Just stuff. And things. The usual.

      • msanthropesmr

        I’m listening to Christmas music inadvertently waiting for my sandwich

        • FukuiSanYesOta

          Why is the sandwich inadvertently late?

          • msanthropesmr

            I asked for extra spam.

          • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

            MONSTER!

          • Dudleydidwrong

            Did you turn off your spam blocker?

    • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

      We’re caught in a landslide, no escape from reality.

    • TJ Barke

      I’m not convinced this isn’t some lesser circle of hell.

  • Msgr_MΩment
    • msanthropesmr

      I’m no zoologist but I think that’s a pig.

      • SisterArtemis

        look in the lower left corner

    • Christopher Story

      I’ve heard of getting some strange, but damn…

    • redarmyzombie

      Interesting times indeed.

    • Ryan Denniston

      I nominate kangaroos (?) the new motto for the republicans.

    • Roadstergal

      At least he’s giving a reacharound…

    • hudson

      the pig asked for it.

      • wide_stance_hubby

        Damn right–look at those clothes!

    • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

      Actually, in the evolutionary history of fucking, close calls have led to genetic changes that led to better survival rates.

      But in this case, the former Australian PM, Tony Abbott, appears to be a top.

    • Bill D. Burger

      Is that Slender Man on the hill in the background? ~shudder~

    • wide_stance_hubby

      See? Gay marriage barely passes and this. What will Australia do once it’s taken over by bouncing hams?

    • La forza del resistino

      from the x-rated directors cut of the movie ‘Babe’?

      • Andre

        Babe 2:Pig Down Under

    • wide_stance_hubby

      Goose likes to watch.

    • tehbaddr

      Reminds me of the Republican party!

    • Angela Ruzzo

      How old is that pig?

    • schmannity

      A dingo humped my baby!

    • GHERKINS du RESISTANCE!

      In the Trump Era, this is known as an “Alternative Turducken”

    • janecita

      The duck paid the pig and the kangaroo? Sounds legit!

    • Michael R

      Now I want a ham pocket .

  • Ryan Denniston

    So, if I am following this correctly, it’s Trump’s lawyers that concoct all the batshit crazy tweets? Are these the people you want working for you?

    • Jacob DiCiaula

      Attorneys fall on swords for client fuck ups. I did today when my client failed to show up and I got the tongue lashing, but no warrant.

      I don’t post on their social media accounts. The idea any lawyer would do so is somewhere between laughable and insane.

  • Joe Beese
    • OrG

      Nope. No shame will be lived with.

    • Ryan Denniston

      Well, when you spend all your time blowing your “betters”…

    • Gosala

      “Well, I did say, ‘Suffer the little children…”

      Republican Jesus

    • Zach Williams

      I’ll explain it to my future children as “Basically…fuck really old white people.”
      SEE, I CAN EXPLAIN IT TO MY KID(S)

    • Zonath

      This. At least the voters in IL-14 can credibly claim that the guy they voted for again and again wasn’t a known pedophile when they voted for him, even if he was an otherwise despicable human being.

    • TJ Barke

      Sure there is: he was falsely accused like Jesus, by gay socialist Jews.

      • jesterpunk

        Can we put that to the test? Lets start with something easy like dump him in the ocean above the Mariana Trench and see if he can walk on water.

        • Angela Ruzzo

          The Spanish Inquisition had some really excellent tests, I’m sure there is a training manual somewhere.
          https://youtu.be/vt0Y39eMvpI?t=37

          • jesterpunk

            No one would expect that.

          • vivian

            Expect what?

    • SayItWithWookies

      Well there was the time a child rapist and serial sexual assaulter was elected president.

  • ariel_gee_398

    I bet Mueller has one of his female colleagues question Pence alone. https://twitter.com/thehill/status/938198831547797504

  • Picabo

    For some reason this pic warms my heart. Correction. I melts it. Go Danica!
    https://twitter.com/pwcdanica/status/937813736932499458

  • hudson

    ot: paging fukui, dazza et al.,
    holder getting suspended is idiotic and irrational. bullshit only it is.

    • WomanInThePersistence

      ???

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        Civilizedball.

    • FukuiSanYesOta

      Yeah, that’s some nonsense right there.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    It’s the holiday season.

    https://youtu.be/rrexj7-E4gA

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      Shared on FB & Twitter, thanks!

  • Gosala

    Say, you know what other sexual pervert shut down his opponents with a mixture of faux moral outrage, bluster, and appeals too the economically anxious?

    • h4rr4r

      Trump?

    • schmannity

      Coach Weakley in high school?

  • Joe Beese

    So I had this idea for a screenplay this morning…

    A store opens at midnight on Black Friday for a sale. But while the first shoppers are trying to check out, the doors get locked from the outside. There’s an explosion and some people are killed. Then a distorted voice comes on the PA telling everyone that they’re going to die as punishment for their materialism. And people start getting picked off in creatively gruesome ways. Sort of Jingle All The Way meets Saw.

    The title is Black Friday, of course. And the tag line is…

    All Sales Are Final

    • FukuiSanYesOta

      I do love a good comedy.

    • Parchment Scroll

      WRITE IT. WRITE IT NOW.

    • Zach Williams

      Idea:
      Jeffrey Donovan playing the main protagonist, Jon Bernthal as the killer.

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        Amy Poehler as the mastermind.

        • Zach Williams

          YES

        • SisterArtemis

          Ok, I was going for Betty White, but maybe it’s a family operation

          • FukuiSanYesOta

            Good call. Betty White can be Amy’s evil amanuensis.

    • Roadstergal

      Can Jean Reno be the one to pick everyone off?

    • OrG

      You’re a sick sumbitch. I like it!

    • Doug Langley

      Well, that’s not bad for a first attempt, why don’t you spend some time and sleep on it . ..

      (** hurriedly emails Paramount **)

      • Parchment Scroll

        You fool! This has New Line written ALL OVER IT!

    • AJ Milne

      Brainstorming:

      Instead of the big reveal right at the beginning, they’re killed, one by one, by their own rush to shop. Announcements are all like: ‘Sale in aisle 4, 4K TVs $300, first five customers only, violence encouraged to settle disputes’. And there’s heavy lead pipes handy in a bin on the way to the display, and Black Friday Shopper’s Fury takes its course.

      • AJ Milne

        Ooo! Or:

        Screw with the viewer with camera angles, make it look like there’s a Freddy Krueger style maniac… But the only maniacs _are_ the shoppers. We only find out at the end they killed each other.

        • vivian

          I really do like the idea of the shoppers not realizing at first that they are locked in, thinking the deaths are just tragic accidents due to over zealous shoppers as they bludgeon each other for iPhones.

          • AJ Milne

            You could also do like a Zombieland style titiling thing with ‘Survival Rules # [varies]: Never [also varies]’, before each death. Like ‘Black Friday Surival Rule 3: Never enter the weed whacker aisle with a dead battery’.

      • vivian

        “Clean up on aisle four, clean up on aisle four.”
        A pair dressed in clown suits wheel over a mop bucket and trash can
        to dispose of the remains.

    • GHERKINS du RESISTANCE!

      It is in a mall, right? Make sure the guy who dies via Chicken Nugget Overdose has a distinctive yellow pompadour.

    • Meccalopolis

      The killers are a group of entitled Heathers who do it for the lulz

  • Last Hussar

    Jones uses his guns for hunting?
    Just another arsehole rightwinger.

  • Parchment Scroll

    Guys. Guys, this tweet will not leave me alone. It keeps getting retweets and as cool as that is, the further it spreads, the more likely it is to attract rape apologists to my mentions and after only a few of them I’m already fucking exhausted. What do?

    https://twitter.com/ParchmentScroll/status/938078049270140928

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      Didn’t RT since you’ve got reservations, but liked an followed. (I’m @AFinLA if you want to follow back &/or want to know who’s following you before you hit the accept button!)

      • Parchment Scroll

        Followed!

    • “mute this conversation” in the pull down menu. You won’t get alerts, but you can choose to read them comments by clicking on the tweet

      • Parchment Scroll

        Yeah, I’m gonna have to. I’ve been liking and replying to non-douches but it’s just too exhausting trying to keep up.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Ryan Denniston

      Because they are all A Idiot.

    • Roadstergal

      It’s not just income tax – property tax and mortgage interest deductions are rather big deals for Californians…

      • JustDon’tSayProbably

        That is for shit-sure. Oy vey is mir.

    • georgiaburning

      Considering how many folks in Issa’s district have guns and jumbo mortgages, he might as well seek political asylum in Alabama for his own safety.

      • Dudleydidwrong

        If he does, is there any chance that Roy Moore would mistake him for a young female?

        I didn’t think so, but hey, it was the one good thought I had about this.

  • WilbyToad

    Republican tax bill polling at a disastrous 29 percent support in two consecutive polls

    In addition, the Quinnipiac poll finds that the GOP tax bill has pushed the electorate toward favoring Democrats to handle taxes by 8 points, after being evenly divided on the matter in August. In fact, voters like Democrats on a lot of issues these days.

    Voters say 55 – 32 percent that the Democratic Party can do a better job on health care

    Voters say 56 – 34 percent that Democrats can do a better job “fighting for the working class”

    Voters say 51 – 37 percent that Democrats can do a better job “representing your values”

    Finally, a majority of voters say Trump is unfit for office, 54 – 40 percent, tying his all-time low.

    By Kerry Eleveld / DAILY KOS
    https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2017/12/5/1721470/-Republican-tax-bill-polling-at-a-solid-29-percent-support-in-two-consecutive-polls

    Election Day, Tuesday, November 6, 2018.

    Sweep.

    • Bill D. Burger

      It’s coming in just above smegma and just below toe jam in most popularity polls.

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Ryan Denniston

      I hope sticking it to the libtards is worth the tax increase and health care cutbacks you will receive.

    • schmannity

      A fantastic Christmas 2018 present, believe me.

      –Schmannity.

    • mailman27

      Mr. Doom ‘N Gloom checking in here… These percentages have been popping up for some time now. When these statistics get to the point where they’re benefiting the rich way too obviously, it’s time to “shut the whole thing down.” The “whole thing,” being, in this case, democracy. I’m not kidding, not for a minute.

    • ((( Augustus )))

      too bad about the gerrymandering and voter suppression, eh?

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • FukuiSanYesOta

      This could be a thing.

      Legal question: Is it legal as a non-citizen to contribute to a GoFundMe knowing it goes to a political candidate? Spidey-sense says no.

      • Resistance Fighter Callyson

        I doubt it, but IANAL.

        You could probably donate to RAINN if you want to help sexual assault survivors, however.

  • Picabo
    • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

      I haven’t seen that room for 35 years. Hasn’t changed. And neither has the power of the human voice for equality and peace.

      • hudson

        no seriously how the fuck do you forget where we came from?

        • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

          What did I forget? Perhaps a translation error?

          • FukuiSanYesOta

            Hudson confused me as well.

          • hudson

            not you ma. duh. we all know that cousin itt is sooper woke.

    • OutOfOrbit

      So do I

    • hudson

      she has her head screwed right, and truly knows what’s valuable. compare and contrast to palins, lahrens etc of the world who could have been anything but turned out of be who they are.

    • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

      Meanwhile in Burma.

      “Aung San Suu Kyi has the benefit of having become an icon without saying a whole lot,” Kenneth Roth, of Human Rights Watch, told me. “Havel came to his position by saying a lot, by being a moral voice. Aung San Suu Kyi didn’t say much at all. She was a moral symbol, and we read into that symbol certain virtues, which turned out to be wrong when she actually began speaking.” Suu Kyi was not an intellectual, like Havel, or a freedom fighter, like Mandela, or an organizer, like Walesa. And, unlike her father, she did not die before her legend could be tarnished.

      https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2017/10/02/what-happened-to-myanmars-human-rights-icon

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Truly. Just seeing her picture here gave me a little feeling of heart-heal.

      • Meccalopolis

        Well said

  • Bill D. Burger

    Oooo! Interesting. Appears that Mueller was in contact with Deutsche Bank much earlier than first thought.

    [Mueller Subpoenas Deutsche Bank Records Related to Trump
    The subpoena concerns documents and data related to people or entities affiliated with the President
    By Jenny Strasburg
    Updated Dec. 5, 2017 5:17 p.m. ET
    WSJ now reporting that Deutsche Bank received a subpoena early in the fall from Mueller’s office “concerning people or entities affiliated with President Donald Trump, according to a person briefed on the matter.”]

    https://www.wsj.com/articles/trumps-deutsche-bank-records-subpoenaed-by-mueller-1512480154?mg=prod/accounts-wsj

    • Joe Beese

      I have it on the authority of Donald Trump’s lawyer that none of this ever happened.

      • Ryan Denniston

        And even if it did, it isn’t illegal because the predisent is the chief law enforcement occifer, and why would an occifer investigate himself?

      • Bill D. Burger

        rotfl
        And since banks don’t have to notify clients if there is a subpoena for their info. Hair Furor is probably learning about all this at the same time we are.

        Countdown to the twittershitstorm….3…..2…

        • schmannity

          First tweet will use at least 3 of the following:
          1. Globalist (Jew in alt-right speak)
          2. Conspiracy
          3. Clinton
          4. Kraut
          5. Obama
          6. Unfair
          7. Me

          • Captain Kraut

            Hey! Leave me out of this shit show, please.

      • Msgr_MΩment
    • Ryan Denniston

      His first inquiry was probably in the summer. Money laundering has been obvious as a target since 2016.

      • JustDon’tSayProbably

        You misspelled 1986

    • Joe Beese
  • Nounverb911
    • Ryan Denniston

      Too bad he wears those long ties, it covers up what little evidence we’d have.

      • georgiaburning

        It’s probably under one ounce

        • Ryan Denniston

          Sad given the two Big Macs, 2 Fish-O-Filets he consumed every damned day on the trail during the campaign.

  • mailman27

    Team Moore?? I’m sure I won’t be the first to suggest that the “Team’s” cheerleaders beef up their security.

  • Nounverb911
  • Nounverb911
    • Joe Beese

      There are worse things to lose a cabinet ministership over.

    • ltmcdies

      I was kid but I remembered my Mom saying it was the that took down Profumo as much as anything
      Some things never change

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Nounverb911
    • hudson

      lol. if im not worng the bill of rights is precious because it was a consensus decree,

  • Doug Langley

    For those coming in late, the staffing agency goofed up the temp job I was supposed to have, but got another one. I start tomorrow. Warehouse work, probably wear me out, but 2nd shift, six days a week so pays more, should get me going till spring semester.

    ** UPDATE ** community college just got in touch and wants me to teach a third class. Good news: it’s my favorite (motion graphics). Bad news: it would put me over the allowed limit of adjunct teachable hours. Dept heads discussing how to handle it.

  • Bill D. Burger
    • JustDon’tSayProbably

      What are the rest of you going to drink?

      • WIDTAP

        Sterno

      • Meccalopolis

        Everything

  • WIDTAP
    • Thiazin Red

      I think we’ve established sex with teens is fine as long as its an old man and a teen girl. Unless that shitbag Milo is going to be a thing again.

      • WIDTAP

        Oooh, so close!

  • Bill D. Burger
  • WilbyToad
    • FukuiSanYesOta

      Succinct and to the point.

      • Mary

        Google is paying 97$ per hour,with weekly payouts.You can also avail this.
        On tuesday I got a brand new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $11752 this last four weeks..with-out any doubt it’s the most-comfortable job I have ever done .. It Sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
        fj323d:
        ➽➽
        ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleOnlineBoxEasyTechJobsOpportunities/easy/jobs ★✫★★✫★✫★★✫★✫★★✫★✫★★✫★✫★★✫★✫★★✫★✫★★✫★✫★★✫★✫★★✫★✫★★✫★✫:::::fj323lhhhh

    • Angela Ruzzo

      THIS!

    • Ryan Denniston

      And we all know where pedophelia leads. Group marriages, man on dog!

      • Andre

        Kangaroo on pig!!11!!!!! search below for relevance

        • Msgr_MΩment

          Duck pimpin’.

        • JAKvirginia

          You know my neighbors?!!

      • Changeling

        Christian values! Same-sex marriage!

      • OrdinaryJoe

        And we all know where wedding cake eating leads…..

        • nightmoth

          Riding a motorized cart in the Wal-Mart frozen pizza aisle?

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Couldn’t that just be “voting for a Republican”?

  • Picabo

    Today in history, 1941. “On this day, the Lexington, one of the two largest aircraft carriers employed by the United States during World War II, makes its way across the Pacific in order to carry a squadron of dive bombers to defend Midway Island from an anticipated Japanese attack.”
    http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history/american-carrier-lexington-heads-to-midway

    And I might add a one finger salute to Admiral Yamamoto.

    • Saxo the Grammarian

      The Japanese were counting on the Lexington remaining in Pearl Harbor, and they had a disappoint over not obliterating the entire U.S. Navy carrier force. This led to the Japanese losing *four* carriers at Midway. Yeah, there was enough egg on Yamamoto’s face to provide breakfast for his entire flag ship’s crew.

  • Nounverb911
  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Ryan Denniston

      Singaporeans frown on infractions of the law. Really, it’s for her own sake.

      • Nounverb911

        I was living in S’Pore in 1994 when Michael Fay was sentenced to be caned for graffiting, the place was an absolute media circus.

        • Ryan Denniston

          Boy I remember that. I was a kid at the time, but it was nuts here too. Not as bad as Elian Gonzalez, but of course, a Bush was not involved in Michael Fay.

  • Nounverb911
    • Saxo the Grammarian

      Tough on crime? You might want to remind your friend that Moore once voted against upholding the conviction of a person accused of raping a four-year-old.

  • janecita
    • Ryan Denniston

      I hope those stockings turn out to be full of indictments.

      • janecita

        Me too!!!

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      I’m confused, how is this helping in our war againsft Christmas? Around these parts, we say “Happy Holidays.”

      • janecita

        I’m done fighting, Christmas won:-( Even worse, I’m an atheist.

        • SisterArtemis

          I am also a Christmas-celebrating atheist. Or agnostic. Whatever, I kind of go back and forth, and pretty much assume we humans have it wrong no matter what we think.

          BUT CHRISTMAS!!!! The lights! The greens! the food! Figuring out the perfect little present for the fambly members! I avoid malls, so it ends up being one of the better holidays all the way around in my life.

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          Lulz, i also enjoy Christmas schmaltz, and I’m an atheist/agnostic.

        • Gosala

          There’s Christian Christmas which celebrates the birth of the Lord and Savior and really has nothing to do with us non Christians.

          There’s cultural Christmas which is a celebration of tradition. (That’s what you’ve got going on).

          There’s Republican Christmas which is an in your face expression of cultural imperialism.

          And there’s commercial Christmas which is a crass celebration of stuff and money.

        • weighmaster

          Also atheist, but Xmas decorations are so delightfully pagan :)

      • Kooolest G

        I’ve started saying “all holidays matter” whenever someone says “merry christmas” to me. my little way of fighting the war on christmas

    • Spurning Beer

      When I was a kid, at Christmas time, Mom would set out her ceramic angels holding letters spelling “NOEL.” I would always rearrange them to spell “LEON.”

      In this case, I suggest you remove the C and A from the top picture, and spell “PEE.”

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Oh god, there’s two of you. My wife festoons the house with nutcrackers, too.

    • Gosala

      I misread that thing on the mantel as saying, “IMPEACH”

      I think I’ve got a problem.

  • Jacob DiCiaula

    Anyone have a great argument for getting a kitty, other then general awesomeness? Had two as a kid, two more that made 18 years as i grew up and passed while I was in Alaska. All great. All would love to lay in front of the fireplace I now have. Trying to convince spouse that a kitty would be nice. Any advice is good and thanks

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      Dogs rule, cats drool!

      • janecita

        Other people’s kitties are also cute.

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          I used to have a super cute Siamese in my neighborhood who would throw herself on her back, waiting for a belly rub, whenever she saw me. I considered her an honorary dog.

      • Gosala

        I love you; but…thhhhpt! X eleventy.

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          I am an unrepentant dog lover.

          Full disclosure: I love all animals, but I’m highly allergic to cats and horses.

          • Gosala

            I don’t mind that you love dogs. In fact it’s endearing, but “cats drool”? Is that necessary?

          • SisterArtemis

            Well, to be fair, some do. My first cat drooled whenever you scratched behind her ears, or gave her a belly rub. Big grey marshmallow of a kitty, total lovey-dovey sap, and kind of gooey.

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            Lol, dogs are the ones who drool IRL, but I do love to stir up a lively debate on dogs V cats on the Wonkette, since I know most of you love the kitties.

          • Gosala

            TROLL!!!

            BLOCKED!

            (Not really, but it was fun to say)

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            Now you’re getting in the holiday spirit you PROSTITUTION WHORE!!!!

            //Throws glass of wine in your face, and tosses table upside down

          • Gosala

            Hah! You can’t throw wine in my face!! You’re BLOCKED 11×11**11

            Commie cunt.

          • shivaskeeper
          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            Also, too, I had 2 kitties when I was a kid, so Im not an actual cat hater, just highly allergic to them.

          • Gosala

            Well allergies…i have them… not to cats, but other things and they suck.

            My mother was allergic to horses really badly which was a problem because my uncle raised horses.

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            I love horses, but i can only admire them from afar.

          • Gosala

            Kiri must be sad.

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            I’m not allergic to unicorns, because they’re magic AND hypoallergenic.

          • Good_Gawd_Yall

            I’m also a dog person. I won’t kick a cat, but when my rescue cat couldn’t get along with my dachshunds, rescue cat found a nice new home. Dogs . . . there’s just something about them.

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            I’ve met some cool cats in my day, too, and I would never hurt an animal or child, but dogs love you more than anyone, outside of yo mama will ever love you. They are perfect as far as I’m concerned.

    • janecita

      Cats are good for your health, they make you smile and they look awesome in pictures.

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      Get one from the pound and save a life.

      Also, unlike dogs, cats don’t have to be walked. Depending on weather conditions in your area, that could be a huge plus.

      • Joe Beese

        Can I upvote this twice?

        • Gosala

          done

      • Jacob DiCiaula

        Haha, I picked a cat from the pound as a kid. We named him Sammy because he was born to a stray in a loading bay of a Wal-Mart.

        I was a stray, my cats will definitely be :)

    • Angela Ruzzo

      What are spouses con arguments?

      • Jacob DiCiaula

        Boring rational arguments about us working and the kids.

        • SisterArtemis

          Cat is perfect then – very low maintenance.

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          Make sure your kids aren’t allergic also, too.

        • Angela Ruzzo

          Those are not valid arguments. The whole point about cats is they don’t require much daily maintenance. They are quite happy to sleep in your house all day long without human interaction, as long as the food bowl is full and the litter box is clean (and some aren’t too picky about that either). They then greet you with overwhelming joy when you come home, which feels really good. Cats are also good for kids – will teach the kids to be humble and have empathy for superior beings, which is good preparation for when the Klingons invade. Also, kittens are simply god’s most perfect creation.

          I went to Egypt for 2 weeks once, leaving my adult cat at home. A neighbor he liked came to feed him and scoop the litter every day. The cat was absolutely fine when I came home, he just wanted to know where the hell was the t-shirt I promised him.

          Take him to the nearest shelter, get him in a room with a couple of 8-wk-old kittens and a feather wand, and I guarantee you he will succumb. It’s the purring, it does it every time.

          • Gosala

            There aren’t enough upvotes

    • Joe Beese
    • SayItWithWookies

      Each cat has a unique personality, it’s fun to experiment with them by giving them different kinds of snacks and toys and things to play with; they’re wonderful to snuggle with (I’ve got one in my lap right now) and they’re very low-maintenance for such intelligent creatures.

      • AJ Milne

        That. Expanding:

        So are people. I get along with cats, and they usually like me. But y’know, I’m nocturnal, light sleeper, kinda energetic and twitchy by nature. Cats probably figure I’m just some very long, relatively furless mutant version of themselves. It’s a good match.

        So: best argument: get your spouse to meet a few at a shelter, see how they get along. They’ll work out if something’s happening.

      • Jacob DiCiaula

        Shadow loved to escape. Ran after that cat at midnight through drainage ditches… 3 times.

        Sammy would paw at the door if you put him out and literally liked to lay on your neck if you sat on the couch.

        Great kitties :)

    • Gosala

      Get a tortoise shell. They are smart, low maintenance, playful, happy and give the most amazing cuddles. A real comfort in an ugly world.

    • janecita
    • DrBigHead

      Have always been more of a dog person. That being said, one of the best animal companions I have shared this planet with was a cat. Adopted him from a shelter just as I took some time off to finish my dissertation. Figured that because I was going to be home all the time it would also be easy to acclimate the cat to our household. He was instrumental in keeping me sane during this very stressful period of my life. He seemed to know just when he needed to distract me, which he would do by jumping up onto the desk, puffing himself up to twice his normal size, and insist that I chase him. He was my buddy for the next 21 years.

    • Elvis Causticfellow
      • janecita

        She is giving you kisses, that’s adorable.

      • Rachel Book Harlot

        That’s such a great pic!

    • You could work your way up to a cat by buying one of mine https://www.etsy.com/shop/NobodysSweetheart

    • Saxo the Grammarian

      I have never had a “problem” cat. Crazy, yes. Dumb, also too. But they’ve all delivered on affection and snuggles. They can be a calming presence, with occasional outbursts of hilarity.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      If you get one be sure you pick a cuddly one. It’s been my (limited) experience that a cat that starts out aloof stays that way, mostly.

    • tehbaddr

      They’ll shit in a box you clean, so you don’t have to walk them?

    • Andre

      The best kitty is a golden retriever, just gonna put that out there in the aether.

      • TJ Barke

        Sure, if you want a walking allergic reaction.

    • BadWolfGirl

      Check out the #CatsOfTwitter, we’ve got a fun corner of the Twitterverse. FYI I’m @timzmom

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/eb7044f92a205f7d834472605ecbcb8fb3e0f35bdb0785fefd58945679b27dec.jpg

    • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

      I have depression, bipolar and other shit going on. The election of Trump made things even worse and my anxiety issues came back with a vengeance. With my three kittahs it’s very likely I would not be here typing this non-comment. Each one of them is a love bug.

      • Opalescent Riddles

        I presume you meant withOUT the kittehs, you’d likely not be here. I am the same. Mine give me (sometimes seemingly the only) reason to get out of bed in the morning and return home alive in the evening.

    • WomanInThePersistence

      I am more of a dog person, but I’ve had some delightful cats in my life. Fred and Charlie ( childhood); Genghis, Simon and Wednesday (As an adult). Cats are really pretty nice beasties.

    • shivaskeeper

      You hit one of the best reasons: They are awesome. In addition to the general awesome is they need less care than dogs. They are more self sufficient. Less likely to suffer separation anxiety when you go away for a few hours and destroy your stuff.

      Yes they may claw up some things, Females don’t spray like a tom will or a fixed male might. If you have small critters, mice, rats, moles, etc, you shouldn’t anymore.

    • Stinky_Hole

      Go to the local shelter. If that doesn’t work, then get another spouse.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Ninja0980

      Yup.
      I read that Northam in VA knew they had it locked up but never let onto to that fact.
      And good for them.
      Every race Democrats run should be treated as if we’re behind, period.

      • ((( Augustus )))

        we just generally have very poor strategy

  • Angela Ruzzo

    Just great! Tonight on PBS Pledge Drive Second Week From Hell is this fantastic show called “Age Reversed With Miranda Esmonde-White” about “How to slow down and even reverse the aging process through exercise and other lifestyle choices.” I could achieve that same goal if I just had access to medical marijuana.

    • alpacapunchbowl

      So PBS is airing straight-up woo now?

      • UncleTravelingMatt

        For a while, though Esmonde-White is pretty harmless. She advocates stretching, primarily.

        • alpacapunchbowl

          Stretching is a very good thing! I dunno about reverse the aging process good though.

          • Stinky_Hole

            Cher straddled a cannon barrel but she still got old.

    • Meccalopolis

      The long island pbs station used to air dead shows during pledge week

    • Stinky_Hole

      Woo.
      This is likely the ‘science’ curriculum Betsy Devos intends to introduce to public education.

  • memzilla Ω

    To keep things in perspective (feel free to copypasta to any RW friends and fam):
    . https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/0cc39ad739335bb7251dd775d09c2fa486ece162f0441eec16a8380ac0148e88.jpg

  • OrdinaryJoe

    1. He is going to fire Mueller. Not an if, it’s a when.

    2. When he fires Mueller, there will be a massive national shitstorm.

    3. Despite the turmoil caused by firing Mueller, the Rethug controlled Congress will do nothing.

    4. There is no statute of limitations on impeachment.

    5. If the sitting Congress does not act, the test of whether this democracy survives, and yes I mean it in just that hyper dramatic sense, will rest entirely on whether the people elect an Impeachment Congress in 2018, House and Senate. IF they don’t, then we know the answer to what direction this country is going.

    • amrak63

      I hope that Mueller is prepared to pass everything he’s learned on to state AGs. Covfefe can’t pardon offenses against state laws.

      • shivaskeeper

        State AG’s can probably get some of his inner circle and most of the hangers on, but they will not be able to charge him until he is out of power.

    • Ryan Denniston

      If we’re at war with North Korea or Iran, will you silly little liberals realize how unimportant your cause is? It’s like, two dimensional checkers. The bellicosity is a ruse to distract and rally a nation.

    • Joe Beese

      I keep saying this, but the math hasn’t changed. Without 19 Republican senators to vote conviction, none of this means a damned thing.

      Those 19 Republican senators will never exist as long as they’re afraid of primary challenges from Trump’s base. And Trump’s base isn’t going anywhere, ever.

      • aktlib101

        And that, is THE problem.

      • jowgajen

        The Dem party is a big tent, we have room for some moderate conservatives who feel that the R party has gone to shit.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Ryan Denniston

      But but but, Pizzagate! And all the lies to the FBI!

    • Rags

      Or a pussygrabber

  • I damn sure believe and have done my part to ensure that men who hurt little girls should go to jail — not to the US Senate.”
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7345482d0a6b1ddbc80ecab6a4bb9180f2de2dded0f599f37d1373210c0d6200.png

    Lock [ INSERT NAME OF REPUBLICAN CRIMINAL HERE ] up!

    https://youtu.be/cbrsy7oeQYE

  • Bub, the cynical zombie
    • jesterpunk

      How is Trump at 35% approval?

      • mackafritz

        35% of the country are morons.

        • Roadstergal

          Morans, I believe.

      • TJ Barke

        Right wing echo chamber.

      • DrBigHead

        That is the base. It will not fall below that number

      • shivaskeeper

        The same reason a Dem with the same issues would be at 30-35%. That is either end of the partisans on the political spectrum that will support their party no matter what. Don’t look for him to ever drop below 30% for more than a day or two.

      • schmannity

        He’s only 10 points above Nixon at resignation (24% approved of Nixon when he resigned??)

        http://www.newsweek.com/trump-approval-nixon-low-650634

        • SkinlessGenderlessMan

          He’s gonna be soooo proud of himself when he does better than Nixon.

          Please, nobody clue him in that this doesn’t work like a golf score….

    • Joe Beese

      Picking up 14 seats doesn’t get us control of the House.

      We’ll need to hope for a brutal recession too.

      (Or is that just the spread?)

      • Raan

        Just the spread.

      • Jesse

        That’s not how many seats dems are projected to pick up, it’s favorability. Gerrymandering puts dems 6% behind, so they need +6 just to get to even. Experts say +8 to +10 is when we start thinking about a ‘wave’ election. D +14 Is very, very good.

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      Holy fuck, men look bad right now.

      • ((( Augustus )))

        some days I almost believe that men simply are bad

        but I know it’s not true, just a small group of horrible men that hold so much power and are so filled with avarice it’s really hard to comprehend

      • Msgr_MΩment

        /looks at mirror

    • Arolpin

      I’ve never suffered from gender dismorphia, but after seeing that I’m considering sex-realignment surgery. How fucking stupid are a plurality of American men? (Fucking stupid!)

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Ryan Denniston

      All three are lies I think it’s fair to assume. Trump’s Razor: whichever explanation is the stupidest is the most likely to be correct.

      • Bad Tom

        Stupidest, or most like what an evil, nasty dick would do.
        Either works.

      • HooverVilles

        Trump’s Razor.
        PURRRRFECT!
        Using it!

  • Nounverb911
  • jesuswasablack
  • Zach Williams

    Really thinking it may be time to pull my wi-fi adapter out again so I’ll get some progress on my blog work…
    I’m sure Rethuglicans will keep being idiots while I’m gone.

  • How long do you think Vanky will wait before dropping Jared? After the initial arrest or until the sentencing? (Jailhouse divorce is my royal wedding.)

    • Joe Beese

      After sentencing.

    • Zach Williams

      She’d probably just take all of Jared’s money and run. Screw being official.
      She’ll probs go to the UAE. Tons of rich people to scam off of and no US extradition treaty.

      • I assumed that was Melania’s plan, with Barron folded-up in a carry-on. (Double check re: extradition from Slovenia)

        • Zach Williams

          Slovenia has no extradition either.
          So Melania will take all of Dotard’s assets and run home.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        Jared’ s broke. He’s been soliciting money from foreigners to prop up his failed purchase of 666 57th street.

    • Ryan Denniston

      How many kids do they have?

      • two in the carry-on, one in the checked luggage.

    • Junior is too dumb not to be in jail but Eric the Teeth and Vanky will become citizens of nowhere, floating on an increasingly filthy party boat in international waters, being snubbed by DECENT tax exile plutocrats

    • Carpe Vagenda

      As long as his daddy doesn’t lose any money Jared hasn’t already lost, he may be her only option.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Ryan Denniston
      • Ryan Denniston

        Are those two parrots fucking?

        • Raan

          If you look closely, it’s a threesome.

        • Captain Kraut

          You know they do, wouldn’t be tacky enough otherwise.

          • Ryan Denniston

            Shit, the scene wasn’t disgusting enough, he needed statues to commemorate his Thoughts.

        • Catstro

          Yuuuuuuup

    • OrG

      Everybody Loves Mueller

    • Daniel

      Fiends

    • schmannity

      Jeers!

    • Spurning Beer

      I Love Lucifer!

  • jesterpunk
    • Ryan Denniston

      Hard to imagine that the will, a promise of a job, and a mere ten hours, this is what I could have.

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/f294b04cb26c544fc0bb3ff796b383540fa607518f47d20a00d14f94e71838be.jpg

      • Zach Williams

        And pretty lands that haven’t been raped by oil.
        I’d love to live in Canada and just be able to have my own house in Manitoba.
        Preferably a Japanese style house with satellite internet.

        …but life’s a bitch and so I’m living in a duplex in Texas.

        • Fwiw I design and build traditional Japanese homes and garden structures.

        • ltmcdies

          have you seen Manitoba….but then maybe you are from there.
          so this is from today

          https://twitter.com/ctvwinnipeg/status/932772085734301697

          don’t get me wrong I’d live anywhere in Canada over the US right now but ….

          • Zach Williams

            I like the cold.
            I think it’s a worthwhile trade-off for the serenity and quiet I’d get.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        Would Canada take us?

    • WilbyToad

      You could post this at Breitbart and get upvotes from trumpies that don’t get it.

      • jesterpunk

        I am not going over there, you will never get rid of the smell. But if you want to feel free.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • OrG

      Just like they got riled about the price tag of Ken Starr’s investigation./S

    • Ryan Denniston

      Marine One has been attacked by graffitos!

    • schmannity

      A bargain!

    • miss_grundy

      It’s a bargain compared to all the golfing vacations that Dotard has taken to Florida and New Jersey.

  • Andrew Rheinheimer

    So has Moore answered back to Kimmel? Or did he punk out after Kimmel told him that he’d love to come down and dance with him?

    • Carpe Vagenda

      As a thirtysomething-year-old combat vet, Roy Moore worked hard on finding a high school student to date. Competing with equals for the respect of other grownups is clearly not his thing.

  • Changeling

    I’m making pancakes at night.

  • onedollarjuana

    The law I want is one that makes lying by politicians acts of slander and libel.

  • Spurning Beer

    You know, a person might think that in the minds of a lot of Alabama voters, prosecuting the Klansmen who bombed the Birmingham church and killed four African American girls was a bad idea.

    • Stinky_Hole

      “Never forget”.

  • Bananas Foster
    • WilbyToad

      Yeah, trying to get that mavericky thing. He probably helped Moore by doing so, considering how they feel about outsiders.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Non-human animals are thanking their lucky stars:

    https://twitter.com/RonaldKlain/status/938187379990548480

  • SayItWithWookies

    Jeff Flake today turned himself into a literal tool. After denouncing Assmouth and Roy Moore, he sat next to Assmouth as he endorsed Moore today. Poor pathetic little moron.

    And Flake’s mere presence next to Trump can’t help but lend legitimacy to Trump and to his claims about party unity. Here was Trump’s top critic, after all, celebrating the party’s great success (or, at least, that’s how it will look to Republicans who are watching). It also can’t help but cause people to wonder just how heartfelt Flake’s criticisms of Trump are. If Flake thinks Trump is so dangerous, they’ll reason, why
    would he even be seen with him? (Flake’s office did not immediately comment on whether the senator was given a say over his seating arrangement.)

    • SkinlessGenderlessMan

      “Flake’s office did not immediately comment on whether the senator was given a say over his seating arrangement is likely to enjoy what he’s going to be doing with his tongue later.”

      Fixed that for them…

      • Ryan Denniston

        Nice to see he, Collins, and McClown burn down their cred with the left. Revealing their true stripes.

      • cmd resistor

        I don’t know how all that works but Trump does seem to manage to seat people next to him that he wants to pressure or something like.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      Apparently, Flake cut a check to Doug Jones, but I’m guessing that was last week, when Moore was down in the polls.

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    “Nobody in the administration or the campaign did anything wrong.”
    “Then why do they continually lie about their contacts with Russia?”
    “Because the Democrats are going to make stuff up about them anyway, and the press will print it because everyone’s out to crucify Trump because he’s trying to do right by the average American.”

    This is why I say Fuck All Trump Voters, including the cop who told me this. They can’t be reasoned with and they can’t be taught.

    • Ryan Denniston

      Party of Personal Projection.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vpCRL_KVC1k

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      Well the average American DOES need a tax exemption for their private jet, you elite coastal snob!

    • jesterpunk

      They have moved on to “Hillary colluded with Russia” now. Because somehow she rigged the election to make sure she lost. They are fucking morons.

      • UncleTravelingMatt

        Always play the classics. That’s one of my favorites. The Democrats, and the Clintons in particular, manage to control every aspect of the electoral process but they somehow screw up just enough to still lose.

        • Beautiful Soup

          Also they kill their enemies, yet Anthony Weiner is still breathing.

      • House0fTheBlueLights

        And that’s not even the Drumpf people. That’s the Bernie people.

    • miss_grundy

      Some people really like smelling their own shite.

    • TJ Barke

      That’s when I stop and say “just how much of a dumb fucking tool are you?”

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      When did protesting become illega…oh, right, Trump is president*.

      • Gosala

        No. The police had been in the business of suppressing dissent pretty much from the beginning of police.

      • House0fTheBlueLights

        They probably organized a few sacrificial lambs to volunteer for illegal acts for the PR value. Right out of Alinsky playbook for civil disobedience.

  • Bub, the cynical zombie

    Sooo – business as usual for the GOP then?
    https://twitter.com/MJGerson/status/938050560124686336

    • yyyaz

      I refuse to accede to the premise that a political party whose sole reason for existence is to maximize pain for the majority while enriching a tiny minority has a “soul.”

    • Gosala

      The republicans lost their soul a long time ago — Bush, jr?, Reagan?, Nixon?, Goldwater?

      It’s just more in the open now.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Heading out the door on this note. BBL, dear Wonkers!

    https://twitter.com/kylegriffin1/status/938182495513792513

    • miss_grundy

      Oh, goody! Follow the money, Mr. Mueller!

    • Duke

      Really? I was watching a press briefing earlier to day and this consternated woman said, quite sternly, that Mueller wasn’t looking at Trump’s finances. She was quite certain and never smiled.

  • WilbyToad

    Bernie Sanders has the Receipts

    https://www.democraticunderground.com/1017469260

    Way to monkey-wrench the bastards with Trump’s own promises.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Awesome.

      I’m pleased to see that he’s decided opposing Trump is a more popular strategy than the one he’s been deploying so ar.

  • Ninja0980

    https://twitter.com/RileySnyder/status/938189563649974272
    Meanwhile..fuck this asshole.
    I know someone who campaigned for this guy and now regrets it.
    Assholes like this turn people off from politics.
    May he be primaried but good next year.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      My feeling is that there needs to be a Congressional investigation. At the end of it, ALL members (snort) with credible allegations resign en masse. But this “the Dems have to resign but not the Rs” bullshit, fuck that. It cannot be case by case.

      • Ninja0980

        I agree with you.
        If nothing else, all Democrats accused could go and the media would still do both sides and Republicans wouldn’t give a crap.

  • Meanie-meanie, tickle a person
    • miss_grundy

      Considering that as each day passes he gets closer to his meeting with St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, you would think that he would try to do more good in the world than bad.

      • Ninja0980

        Sad to say but I knew someone who was still a cruel *($ when she got terminal cancer.
        Life isn’t a Hallmark movie where people see the light many times.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    There is STILL the occasional troll popping up on the GFY Sanders thread. If anybody has anger issues to work out.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      I feel like I don’t want to make Republican trolls that happy?

      • WomanInThePersistence

        I’m just responding with holiday songs.

        • Parakeetist

          Yay

    • WilbyToad

      They wouldn’t dare besmirch Navy pilots. Let’s send them to the sky penis thread. It might be cathartic.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      I’d be game, but I’m sleepy.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Sorry – it wasn’t a call to arms. More an expression of wonderment.

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          They are tireless, that’s why they win.

  • amrak63
  • Wuulf
    • Cat Cafe

      Not sure how much more it takes for people to fully get that Evangelical “Christianity” is a child-molesting, woman-hating, white male supremacy hate cult…..

      • OutOfOrbit

        Well it is a Cult, so …

      • Gosala

        racist, self hating… let’s not forget that also too.

    • Gosala

      “Your obedience is known to all, so that I rejoice over you, but I want you to be wise as to what is good and innocent as to what is evil.”
      – Romans 16:19

      Christian leaders must keep a close watch on the flocks under their care, and in so doing, they are to have a particular concern for the “naive” or “simple.” Paul indicates as much in Romans 16:18 when he points out that those whom false teachers are apt to lead astray are those who are naive, that is, relatively unlearned in the faith and not wise to the way that Satan works in the world. That such people are particularly susceptible to false teaching is obvious, and the elders of the church need to keep a watchful eye on them.

      http://www.ligonier.org/learn/devotionals/wise-good-innocent-evil/

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

    Evil Clinton Foundation Up to More No Good

    https://twitter.com/ClintonFdn/status/937366092682539008

    • gallbladder

      Heartless bastards.

    • Cat Cafe

      Those medical supplies are SO SHRILL!

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      “Who do I have to kill to get some bottled water and vienna sausages?”
      “I believe his name was ‘Foster’.”

    • SayItWithWookies

      They probably talked some corrupt potentate into donating the funds. When will it all stop?

    • Arolpin

      See, Hitlary won’t go away. Just because the president* isn’t helping Puerto Rico, doesn’t mean that Hitlary should go in and help. If the Puerto Ricans want to starve rather than kiss the president’s* ass, they should starve!

  • Cock Blockula
    • Ryan Denniston

      Robert Oppenheimer’s libelz!

      • altleftjohn

        I am become Trump, destroyer of worlds.

        • Ryan Denniston

          He kind of goes full Orangutan, of course it takes all the wind to do it.

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emVaK5MoPBg

          • altleftjohn

            Ehttps://m.youtube.com/watch?v=15YgdrhrCM8

        • Bobathonic

          Mike Nelson libelz!

        • SkinlessGenderlessMan

          Fuck, please no.

  • Covfefe

    Et tou Mike?

    One Republican willing to place country over party and himself. When the pussy-gate Tape was released. Mike Pence, who couldn’t get re-elected in Indiana, agreed to sacrifice himself at the Top of the GOP ticket if Donald could be bribed to step aside. Praise .jesus!

    • Ryan Denniston

      Mother is keeping his balls in her purse for safe storage.

      • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

        Cryogenic storage?

        • Ryan Denniston

          Pence Balls on Ice. Seems fitting with the season.

        • OutOfOrbit

          No. Locked in vice grips

      • Viktor

        Mommy drains them nightly via syringe and tube to keep his juice from other ladies. Mike is a cuckold without the cuck.

    • Master Contrail Program

      That’s what they get for killing Apollo Creed.

    • Ryan Denniston

      Yeah, tiny penis should be enough to shame these people. Show us your junk. Evan dictates.

    • wait! what?

      Well, sure. But what do the male users have to say?

  • Jacob DiCiaula

    I don’t want to repeat myself, but this Roy Moore stuff is insane. I was Roy Moore. I was a prosecutor, did the army, was single in my 30s in a smaller county.

    The idea I would ask out a teenage girl at the courthouse is pants on head nuts. Fuck him

    • shivaskeeper

      You were not Roy Moore. You are lacking on of his biggest traits. You are not a fucking child molester.

      • Jacob DiCiaula

        My oldest stepson is a teenager now borrowing my car. Great kid! He’s far from being an adult. The idea of going on a ‘date’ with a girl his age is laughable

      • WomanInThePersistence

        I really have to work on my scrolling down skills.

    • Changeling

      It makes me wonder where their parents were. It kind of seems he knew how to pick them – the one outside the custody hearing, the one now talking about a consensual affair (at 17) wrote something in her scrapbook to the effect that “he’s the only one who believes in me”.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        I was once a TeenagedGirlInThePersistence. And also much more vulnerable than I thought I was. He obviously was very good at grooming these girls. Because I certainly didn’t tell my mother everything.

        • Marion in Savannah

          I wonder how many of us have stories that we never told our mothers…

          • Parakeetist

            Everyone. I still don’t tell everything to my Mom, and I’m 44.

          • WomanInThePersistence

            AOU, K.

      • Jacob DiCiaula

        I’m going to caveat with, again, I don’t ask out teenagers at the courthouse

        That said… it’s easy to be creepy if you’re a prosecutor. You’re in a suit. You can direct the deputies on where to put people in interview rooms. You can tell people they have to talk to you. Tell people whatever. To tell this to teenage girls… I can see why you might get a ‘consensual’ date

    • WomanInThePersistence

      For some reason, I doubt that you tried to “date” teen-aged girls when you were in your 30s. Call it a guess.

      • Jacob DiCiaula

        I’m still in my 30s :). My wonderful spouse indicated her opinion on me dating younger women- I’ll cut you. That seemed pretty authorative.

        My teenage stepson showed me a selfie he and a girl took together. They’re children. The idea of being an adult and asking a girl out at that age- cripes

        • WomanInThePersistence

          There’s a big difference between “younger women” and girls. I

    • Stinky_Hole

      Probably learnt it from his daddy.

  • Viktor

    Anyone willing to follow Roy’s Twitter feed? Make sure you use a good name, “Abortionbadnoabortionsever4everandever”

  • Carpe Vagenda
    • ariel_gee_398

      Upon seeing the photos, Orrin Hatch thought,”If they’ve got toys, they can sell them for food to eat instead of begging for help from the international community.”

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I’ve hated Orrin Hatch for decades. Really, really hated. He’s a terrible human being.

        I sincerely hate him even more now.

        I don’t do violence, because there’s no point. But fuck this guy.

        • yyyaz

          Three thumbs up!

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      So, drug paraphernalia, mostly. That’s great.

      • Marion in Savannah

        Da fuk?

        • UncleTravelingMatt

          I’ve seen a lot of drug paraphernalia over the years. Several of those “toys” look like shit junkies tossed, and those kids (unwittingly) picked up.

          • Marion in Savannah

            Yeah, I could see that. It was the “mostly” that got me — or maybe I’m just such A Old I no longer can recognize drug paraphernalia.

          • Joe Beese

            What’s with this “vaping” nonsense? I don’t get it.

            And turn down that music before I call the police.

          • UncleTravelingMatt

            It’s also possible that I spend way too much time around addicts.

          • Marion in Savannah

            Let’s split it down the middle — I think the one that broke my heart was the razor blade. Treasured as a toy… Well, I guess you can whittle with it?

    • Holly

      I want to gather everything I have that can be remotely realized as a toy for these little ones. The heart absolutely breaks. What I will do instead is send money to the International Rescue Committee (IRC)
      https://help.rescue.org/donate/myanmar

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I like them. They’re on my list.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨
    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Yet Republicans run the majority of governments both Federal and State.

    • OrG

      Good thing they still have Gerrymandering,voter suppression and general rat fuckery to fall back on.

    • alpacapunchbowl

      And how will Dems manage to squander the opportunity?

      • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

        Let’s ask Chuck “Both Sides” Todd and Nina “Anybody I am not supporting is evil” Turner.

      • DrBigHead

        Hold my beer…..

      • UncleTravelingMatt

        Donna Brazile is on this motherfucker.

        • Stinky_Hole

          Welp, the non-pure ain’t gonna crucify themselves…

      • Carefully!

    • Holly

      The numbers don’t say enough – yet. It’s a start, but not enough to convince me Republicans have or will ever have even a glimmer of an existential awakening.

      • Arolpin

        If we take back the House & Senate in ‘18, the Presidency and some state legislatures in ‘20, and have the will to propose severely gerrymandered districts OR a law (state constitution change would be better) requiring non-partisan committees to set the districts, based on percentage of voters for each party statewide, then it won’t matter if they wake up or not. We’ll let ‘me keep a couple states in the Deep South and interior West, and fix the damn country.

    • Michael R

      Does this prove that Trump did not win the election
      or that Democrats don’t vote ?

      • Everrett Fanuelli

        Proves that Democrats are too much of touchy bitches.

      • Marion in Savannah

        It proves that gerrymandering is doing EXACTLY what it was designed to accomplish.

    • Scrofula

      I think that’s proof that the country really is more left-leaning than it thinks. The GOP rallies every election when its enormous media apparatus bulldozes poor whites; afterward, people slowly return to the reality that their lives are shit, and Democratic policies don’t sound so bad.

      The failure is in the message; granted it’s like facing a thousand-foot wall to try to counter the Republican media machine.

      • The failure is not the message. The failure is that the message is too long, boring and nuanced for the average American to chant along to.

      • ltmcdies

        or it proves gerrymandering and voter suppression can do a hell of a lot of damage

        Not to mention the Electoral College

        But it demonstrate why Clinton won the popular vote.

        • They can’t win unless they cheat, and then they claim their wins are proof the people are with them.
          Rinse. Repeat.
          Did no one learn from the Jim Crow South?

    • *facepalm* grab them by the pussy did not work. A screaming match with a dead soldier’s father did not work. Being racist as fuck did not work. Never paying his workers did not work.
      But a shitty tax bill that will hurt them,…..bridge too far!
      I’ve said it a million times, they never get it until it happens to them

  • Holly

    Will these idiots EVER realize that their Twits on the Twatter will fucking ALWAYS come back and bite them on their dumb as fuck ass? This was a year ago. And now the lying fuck is shrieking the FBI is the evil empire out to get them, and their little dog too..

    Sarah Sanders

    @SarahHuckabee
    When you’re attacking FBI agents because you’re under criminal investigation, you’re losing
    2:12 PM – Nov 3, 2016
    10,015 Replies 30,340 30,340 Retweets 32,766 32,766 likes

    • Wonky McUbtrye

      Will the tweets ever bite them, though? So far, it seems like they can write and say whatever the fuck they want with no consequences whatsoever.

      • Holly

        Evidence gathering. It’s a great tool for evidence gathering.

    • Bub, the cynical zombie

      This only happens to those who have no core principles, no consistently held beliefs, no moral centre. If you understand that viewing all situations through the prism of short term benefit, of political expediency, risks showing yourself to be a hypocrite you will avoid these pitfalls. But Republicans have no core principles, and think of EVERYTHING in terms of how they can turn it to their advantage RIGHT NOW. The problem is that their voters are so stupid and short-sighted that they let them get away with it – and most of the the media has a strange aversion to calling them out on their hypocrisy.

      • Stinky_Hole

        It’s authoritarianism. These are the rules. This is right; that is wrong. This is how WE judge people and how we know THEY judge us, so, no exceptions. You keep doing that and doing that down through the generations and you get Sarah Huckabee Sanders – self-righteous prig.

    • Stinky_Hole

      “Introspection”?

  • mrFawkes
    • Jacob DiCiaula

      I didn’t mind when President Obama golfed. I didn’t mind when President Trump golfed. It’s a tough job and folks deserve time to relax.

      But this bizarre notion the Mueller investigation should be stopped because it costs money? That’s nuts. I don’t want his agents robbing liquor stores. They should investigate and go where it takes them

      • mrFawkes

        I am mildly critical of trump only playing at his courses and over-charging the Secret Service for the golf carts. He has zero interest in art, culture, cinema et al. He’s intellectually incurious, and golf and insults are his leisure. If it matters, I’m a one-handicapper, I love golf but I detest the country club/rich republican attachment to it.

      • Marion in Savannah

        If Trump actually, you know, WORKED AT THE JOB HE WAS “ELECTED” TO DO I wouldn’t give a crap if he golfed. However…

      • JohnBull

        I’m quite fine with Trump golfing. He can’t fuck things up when he’s doing that.

        • Smoke O’Hontas

          Plus he can cheat without hurting anyone and can’t tweet because he has to focus on his grip, and cheating.

          • Amy!

            It does both explain something about a lot of the stuff that he does, and suggest that his experience cheating at golf teaches bad habits. That is, he apparently “takes a mulligan” whenever he misses a shot, for any reason or none. A mulligan, I learn, is when you back up to where the ball was before the shot and have a do-over. And golfers apparently use them, informally, when they’re golfing for recreation and some sort of bad luck happens (dog runs across the green, broker calls and you forgot to turn off the phone, caddie trips and makes a noise dropping your clubs, lightning strikes, rocks fall and everyone dies, like that). Trump apparently uses them all the time, and since he blusters high-handedly and assumes compliance, people go along with it (and tell stories to other golfers, to forewarn them that he can’t play anything like what his scores suggest).

          • Smoke O’Hontas

            Fooling around on the course, foul language, smoking grass…poor caddying!

  • Anne Of Green Bagels
    • wait! what?

      Mueller doesn’t need a subpoena for these bank records if they are given to him as part of a plea deal.

      • Rick Hill

        Yeah but considering their target, they need things as official as possible. In this case, records directly from the bank.

    • Joe Beese

      So Trump owes them $364 million, eh?

      That would seem to given them a financial interest in his survival.

      • Marion in Savannah

        Chump change to a bank like that.

      • Anne Of Green Bagels

        Deutsche Bank was one of the main culprits in the housing bubble. they are naughty, naughty, naughty. no surprise they’d lend Trump money and also no surprise that they’re apparently tattling on Trump now. you can bet that Europe is watching this chapter of the Trumpenlied with raised eyebrows.

    • Correct me if I am wrong, but isn’t there a serious no no no when it comes to a president owing a foreign entity?

      • Amy!

        It’s okay as long as you get some of those tasty little emolu-mints when you sign the contract.

      • Anne Of Green Bagels

        I have no idea where the legal boundaries are here but this smells a lot like quid pro quo.

  • amrak63

    I remembered that I could copy and paste this comment from Lars Macomb (no, I am not LM) on No More Mr. Nice Blog.

    Lars Macomb • 2 days ago
    In our current era, elitism is ultimately about condescension. It is not about money or privilege. It is about BEING JUDGED.

    Persons with scientific knowledge, literacy, and high level skills have a unique intellectual capacity to assess the habits and practices of their fellow citizens—and these persons often make judgments about things that are risky, unhealthy, dangerous, intolerant, and so forth.

    Quite often the persons who lack this knowledge, literacy, and skill—perhaps because they never wanted it or perhaps because this discipline was not suited to them—loathe the judgments made by the “educated/skilled” elite and take everything they say as personally as possible.

    This is why the “deplorable” comment hit that segment of America with the impact of an atomic weapon. And this is why Trump, despite all his money and privilege, has become their messiah. He is a tactless, untalented, ignoramus and has been a ruthless boor his entire life.

    He does not stand for anyone’s condescension, even if it isn’t condescension per se but is instead a judgment issued by someone who knows things that he does not. It doesn’t matter if it was Manafort then or Gen. Kelly now. No one tells him anything.

    • amrak63
    • Stinky_Hole

      “Us” versus “Them”.

    • CripesAmighty

      They hate being called out as crude, ignorant, superstitious simpletons who live in shit because they’re too lazy to bother developing any skills, because they know it to be true.

      • amrak63

        And then they bitch and moan ’til the cows come home (for them to fuck when their own cousins are too fast for them to catch) about the alleged laziness of the ni*CLANG*s and Meskins.

      • ((( Augustus )))

        CLASS WARFARE !!!!!1

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸
  • yyyaz

    When I was 30, I was a hard-partying, all-night long, boogie ’til you puke then boogie some more dude with some serious attitude. I was also living in Daytona Beach, and yet I knew I was too old to be hanging out with the Spring Breakers, let alone freaking high-schoolers or mall-hangers. Roy Moore and anyone endorsing or voting for him is a sick puppy.

    • GreenGoldSharpie

      Welcome to what’s left of white evangelism.

      • yyyaz

        Yep. smh

    • Blackest Noobs

      i say worse than sick puppy.

      i have this idea that maybe Jesus is real. but not like how they think he is.

      i imagine him slicing Roy Moore’s head off as he is sworn in the Senate with the flaming sword he borrowed from the angel guarding the entrance to the Garden of Eden. Second Coming, bitches.

    • Meanie-meanie, tickle a person

      Even after 2-3 quarts of port?

  • Cogswell – Overlord of Barsoom
    • SayItWithWookies

      “They weren’t all underage — heck, one of ’em was nineteen!”

  • Gosala

    I’m in a foul mood. So rather than make an
    idiot of myself I’ll just sign off with this — the immortal Edith Piaf

    Good night and good luck.

    https://youtu.be/vwe3CzWZ4Bg

    https://youtu.be/Q3Kvu6Kgp88

    https://youtu.be/rzeLynj1GYM

    https://youtu.be/lu3eSNi__4w

    • Marion in Savannah

      Hope your mood lightens — you just did a world of good for mine by posting some of my all time favorite music.

    • cmd resistor

      Many years ago I frequented a wonderful bar in Atlanta that had the most amazingly eclectic jukebox. They had several Edith Piaf tunes.

    • Impatient

      Okay, now, I’m a gonna just stick my neck out here. While risky to follow anyone who’s “immortal,” have you heard of a young French singer who goes by just “Zaz”? Some of her stuff is clearly drawn from Piaf. Upbeat, positive, generally, fun to listen to. She’s been my goto CD while driving among the Murican morons, ever since about, oh, 11/9/2016. Definitely give her a try, for what mood ails you. Her “Je Veux” number is a good example, though among her less Piaf-y stuff.