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A (finally!) happy Wednesday to you, Wonkers! Dom is unavailable for the first time ever this morning, and we are up early to do a very pathetically shortened Wonkagenda for you! It’s HARD! Here are some of the things we may be throwing AT YOUR FACE TODAY!

Virginia: A ‘rout’ or a ‘thrashing’? Danica Roem, a trans journalist, defeats Bob Marshall, a bigot. A Democratic Socialist beats the GOP House whip.

CNN’s Chris Cillizza was a total Cillizza again. CNN, can we have his job?

A civil rights attorney, Larry Krasner, won the Philadelphia District Attorney race. Is that even legal???

NJ obvs.

Maine expands Medicaid all over Gov. Paul LePage’s ass.

The New York Times drops Democratic superlawyer David Boies for being Harvey Weinstein’s spying piece of shit by proxy.

It’s open season on laughing at Jeff Sessions again.

Trump lies that, with the exception of the estate tax, the Trump Tax Cut bill (for the super-rich only) will “hurt” him. Like we don’t already know about the abolishment of the AMT and the shiny new 25 percent passthrough rate and the thingie about being able to swap real property. Maybe he is talking about the new tax on grad students? Or taxing moving expenses? Or teachers’ school supplies? Those all hit Donald Trump very very hard!

Hugh Hewitt is warning there will be Virginia-style GOP bloodbaths all over the country if they don’t pass their stupid tax cut bill (for the super-rich only). We’re just a mommyblogger, but is it possible the people voting against the GOP don’t LIKE their stupid tax cuts for the super-rich only? LOL jk, that’s stupid.

Signed up for Obamacare yet? LOL EVERYONE ELSE HAS! Man, Trump can’t kill anything right.

The Texas church shooter? Yeah, the Air Force fuuuuuucked up: He once “escaped a mental facility” after threatening to kill his superiors. They are sorry?

Trump said something stupid in South Korea, we don’t know, we were watching the ‘lections on Twitter. Probably somebody else heard it though.

Your late night roundup? Oh, no, we don’t have TV in the #wonkebago. Here’s what we’ve been watching instead.

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