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We’ve got plenty of pictures of them, so it’s no big

Just the week after he was sworn in as Interior Secretary in March, Ryan Zinke did his part to demonstrate he was down with the new anti-regulation dynamic of the Trump administration by repealing a US Fish and Wildlife Service directive Barack Obama tried to sneak past the American People on the day before Donald Trump was sworn in. The lawless Kenyan dictator had signed an order banning the use of lead ammunition and lead fishing tackle on federally owned lands. The greatest Freedom experts in US America, the National Rifle Association, condemned Obama’s last-minute move to protect birds and fish from lead poisoning as Obama’s “final assault on gun owners’ and sportsmen’s rights,” just like how he had earlier taken everyone’s guns away.

Well, damned if Zinke was going to let that tyranny stand, man, so he not only rescinded that order, but also issued a secretarial order to expand hunting and fishing on federal lands, so that hunters could blast all the lead into the environment they wanted to.

We’re sure it’s purely a coincidence, but today, NBC Washington reports the Wildlife Center of Virginia has admitted a record-setting 43rd bald eagle suffering from lead poisoning this year. The raptors may be the national bird, but they’re disgustingly dependent on Big Government to protect them from stuff like DDT and lead contaminating their food supply, the damned takers. Turns out that bald eagles and other animals, which haven’t even consulted with the NRA, can be poisoned by fragments of lead ammunition while scavenging animal carcasses. Eagles can be killed by a lead fragment the size of a grain of rice. The Wildlife Center seems to think that’s a problem, not merely the understandable price we must pay for Liberty:

Officials say nearly 70 percent of the eagles admitted had measurable amounts of lead in their blood. Six had lead levels too high for the center’s in-house lead analyzer to measure […]

“When a harvested deer is ‘field dressed’ — the practice of removing the internal organs from animals harvested for human consumption – the gut piles that are left behind on the ground can contain extremely small fragments of lead ammunition,” The Wildlife Center said in a statement.

Now don’t go blaming Ryan Zinke for this one, you damn liberals, because nothing in the NBC Washington story says whether the poisoned eagles encountered lead on federal or private land, so maybe those eagles were trespassing. The Wildlife Center and conservation groups have been urging hunters to switch to non-lead ammunition, but that’s only because they’re a bunch of crybaby snowflakes who think eagles matter more than the Second Amendment.

Yr Wonkette has so far been unable to confirm the rumor we just started that Secretary Zinke owns a stake in several manufacturers of lead ammunition.

Yr Wonkette is supported by reader donations. Please click here to send us money. No lead slugs of any kind, please.

[Reuters / NBC Washington]

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  • TJ Barke

    They love America so much that they just have to let its national symbol go extinct…

  • Msgr_MΩment
    • arglebargle

      Go Eagles. And take the Flyers with you.

  • ManchuCandidate
  • Gayer Than Thou

    Silly libtards! The way it works is this: you can put whatever you want into the environment, and Jesus will remove it. Or he won’t, because god’s plan and we’re all about to die in the apocalypse. But either way, it’s all good. (Note: god’s plan works a little bit differently in poor and brown communities and also in the handful of communities that are not in U.S. America.)

    • PubOption

      Jesus doesn’t seem to Love a Canal near Buffalo.

  • Michael Smith

    The private sector will take care of eagles, if there’s really such a demand for them.

    • ManchuCandidate

      Tastes like Frey.

  • Gayer Than Thou

    I have an idea – you can have your lead bullets, but we’re banning all guns, all hunting, and all fishing.

  • Ali | A Grumpy Cat

    “Yr Wonkette has so far been unable to
    confirm the rumor we just started that Secretary Zinke owns a stake in
    several manufacturers of lead ammunition.”

    $5 says this turns out to be true.

    • Crystalclear12

      I don’t make those kinda bets anymore.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      See your $5 and raise you $10.

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    Damn Bald Eagles making all their babies and driving Cadillacs

    • therblig

      using their food stamps for lobster!

  • P’jama Pahnts

    I’m usually prepared for a daily dose of idiocy from this administration. Today my cup runneth amok.

  • arglebargle

    Our [edit] national Parks are experiencing Zinke poisoning.

    • OutOfOrbit

      good one & yes, it seems so donut it?

      • arglebargle

        editied to fix my grammer derp.

        • Covfefe

          Stuff like fixing grammar is known in Lansing as a “technical amendment.” No one cares. They pass them by voice vote. So you can fix your grandma whenever you want.

  • Crystalclear12

    Yep, this is going great.
    Can’t wait for the first river fire.
    But, hey, less regulation. . .

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Plus side? No more Cleveland.

  • Msgr_MΩment
  • MynameisBlarney

    I got 5 soros ducats sayin this is turmp gettin back at that eagle that tried to kill him.

    https://i.imgflip.com/1yd94b.jpg

    • wide_stance_hubby

      We were so close to having missed all this, but for some fucking tether.

      • MynameisBlarney

        DAMN YOU TETHER!

    • Suttree

      Jaguars Ferrets Eagles ripped My Flesh!

      • wide_stance_hubby

        That video would explode YouTube.

      • Arolpin

        Frank Zappa libelz! (Frank hates the fucking Eagles too, man.)

    • Maclare’s Castle o’ Crap 🏰

      Yep, Twitter holds a grudge.

    • PubOption

      The eagle is fine with people who don’t have dead animals on their head.
      https://pbs.twimg.com/ext_tw_video_thumb/743468652251447296/pu/img/KhvTw5_f1ToCuVWt.jpg

    • BosGrl

      Drumpf looking a-feared is my favorite Drumpf.

  • arglebargle

    Real men hunt with atlatl’s.

  • Anna Elizabeth’s Milkshakes

    OT – Back from Target. I didn’t buy anything, but I saw some awesome boots I might get next Friday/Payday. No issues, one guy honked at me, and I strode thru Crosswalks like Black Widow after she told the NSC is so many words to kiss her Russian Ass.

    Our regular mailman saw that old Motherfucker try to run me over! He thinks the dude was just so old he didn’t see me, but I don’t agree. Oh well.

    Also too, some man in Target was trying so hard to check me out without his wife noticing. I should have dropped something and bent at the waist. xD

  • Suttree

    I can’t find the article at the moment, but I saw something yesterday about employees at indoor gun ranges something something lead poisoning.

    “We had no idea! No one ever warned us of this.”

    -said some slack jawed yokel

    • Ducksworthy

      Not fair! His job made Cletus a slack jawed yokel.

    • jesterpunk
      • BosGrl

        Or this one from guns.com from May.
        http://www.guns.com/2017/05/12/study-gun-range-lead-exposure-poses-significant-health-risk/

        Best comment: “Get ready – Lead is the new back door to gun confiscation. For your health, of course.”

        • jesterpunk

          Some Moran in the other article says something similar. How its a way for the anti gun lobby to take their guns.

          • BosGrl

            The NRA is a cult.

          • willi0000000

            . . . and terrorist organization.

      • MynameisBlarney

        Irony.
        Massive piles of it.

        • Notreelyhelping

          Here’s an irony for you: in the days of lead paint, pro painters used to develop paralysis in their hands from lead exposure. They event called it painter’s hands. If the shooting nuts couldn’t pick up their bang sticks….

          • willi0000000

            they’d still pick them up . . . but with physical control approaching their current mental control.

      • Suttree

        Almost. It was pretty similar. I didn’t read the whole thing. I closed the page after I saw that quote as a picture caption.

      • Creepoman

        Lead strikes again! So (according to urban legend), the Roman Empire collapsed because the elite used lead plumbing and ate of lead coated dishes. The American Empire will collapse because of countless gun-humping morans inhaling copious amounts of hot lead and listening to Alex Jones.

        • willi0000000

          and they apparently liked lead compounds as a sort of original artificial sweetener.

    • Anna Elizabeth’s Milkshakes

      In Eric Haney’s “Inside Delta Force” he mentioned thsat back when the Delta Force was formed, they built a deluxe Kill House for live-fire training, but they installed the exhaust fans to high and they were poisoning the Operators will Lead dust.

      But Operators shoot a *lot*. Haney mentions a month when Colonel Beckworth chewed their asses because they only shot 1 million rounds of .45ACP hardball.

  • Ducksworthy

    If lead is good enough for Michiganders its good enough for Eagles!

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    Is there nothing left sacred in this fucking country anymore? Between the stories about women of color being kept from seeing their infant children and ICE pouncing on sick 10-year-olds with glee, and now this, I’m starting to feel like I woke up in some alternate universe where right is wrong and wrong is triumphant. Gawddammit.

    • BosGrl

      It’s too much.

      • Good_Gawd_Yall

        Yes, it really is. The daily tsunami of horrible stories from this regime is wearing me down. I’ve begun to understand why the German volk turned blind eyes to what was happening; after awhile you simply can’t pay close attention without damaging yourself.

        • BosGrl

          You are so right. When you were a kid and first learning about Nazi Germany, didn’t you think, OMG, how the hell did this happen? And now we know.

        • CindyinEncinitas

          I’m struggling with the news too. Opinions that there is no way out without Repugs doing something are particularly upsetting.

  • NerdWithNoName

    The Eagles are 6 and 1. Best record in the NFL! Whats to hate?

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara
  • Bright Bart
  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Bub, the cynical zombie

      That eagle is goddamn lucky it didn’t get its beak into Donnie’s toxic carcass. It would have made lead poisoning seem like a mild cold.

      • cmd resistor

        Just wanted some of that straw-looking hair for nest building purposes.

  • calliecallie

    You can have my lead ammunition when you pry it from that eagle’s cold, dead talons.

  • Sheepshagger

    Fuck you man! You don’t like my fucking corruption, get your own fucking country !

  • Anna Elizabeth’s Milkshakes

    Does Anypony else get the feeling that this Administration is the final looting before the rich retire to bunkers and mineshafts?

    • calliecallie

      Or to their luxury missile silo condo:
      http://survivalcondo.com/

    • Wild Cat

      My wish was that they’d just loot every fucking thing by mid-Summer so they’d just go away and we could start rebuilding.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      As long as the outcome in their bunkers is similar to that in Hitler’s, I’m strangely okay with the second part of your question.

    • Covfefe

      The rich aren’t going to retire to bunkers and mine shafts they’re going to retire to their plantations. After they repeal the minimum wage, social security, Medicare, unemployment insurance and food stamps, and all that other welfare stuff, anyone who wants to eat is going to have to work their fields.

      • MynameisBlarney

        I’m sure that will work out like they hope and won’t backfire on them in a sudden and violent manner.

        • Anna Elizabeth’s Milkshakes

          Bring home the boys and scrap scrap metal the tanks
          Get hitched and make a career out of robbing banks
          Because the world is just a teller and we are wearing black masks
          “You broke our spirit,” says the note we pass

        • Suttree
          • MynameisBlarney

            “we will call it…this land”

        • TakingAmes

          We’re in the “bread and circuses” phase. They think if we’re fed (on processed calories that barely resemble food) and entertained, we won’t revolt.

      • Anna Elizabeth’s Milkshakes

        So they might believe.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        They weren’t kidding about taking America BACK.

    • MizzMazz

      What burns me up is how many of us poor/working class people aren’t infuriated with what’s going on. The whole, “We’re lucky to have (3) jobs.” shit is getting really old.

      • Anna Elizabeth’s Milkshakes

        It is. I’d like to see a little Spirit out there.

        • MizzMazz

          It’s all quiet desperation out there, isn’t it? Work ’em 15 hours a day, and there’s no energy left for outrage.

          • Anna Elizabeth’s Milkshakes

            *nods*

            But it cannot last.

      • There are now a bevy of country songs that say just that

        • MizzMazz

          Southern Culture on the Skids is about as country as I get.

          • Biel_ze_Bubba

            I thought that WAS country.

      • Fancy Meau-Faux

        ‘Cause a hammer needs a nail
        And the poor man’s up for sale
        Guess I’m doin’ what I’m on this earth to do

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VvlTwSWyqUM

  • Michael R

    We need to change the national bird to
    something more suited to this administration

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/4506ea8b87df9bde769156c91f839b03a4c6b46c56525558bb10e7b99548bcf0.gif

  • Bub, the cynical zombie
  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    Can someone please invent a time machine and go correct several wrongs, including:
    2nd amendment
    Electoral College
    Reagan election
    Fred Trump not using a condom
    Paul Ryan receiving taxpayer help as a yout
    Faux ‘news’ getting allowed on air
    Rush Limpballs
    Bill-O

    Feel free to add your own suggestions to this admittedly-partial list.

    • Eileen Besse

      T.H.I.S.

    • calliecallie

      This could be the plot for the next edition of Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure.

      Bill and Ted are middle-aged now, but still sneaking a joint behind the garage before leaving to pick up the kids from middle school. Their economic anxiety prompted them to vote for Trump, but realizing the error of their ways, they resurrect the time machine to set some things right.

      • MizzMazz

        I would watch the hell out of that.

    • MizzMazz

      Dubya, Patriot Act, Cancellation of Firefly.

      • calliecallie

        FIREFLY! Of course.

      • Suttree

        We need to kidnap Joss Whedon to rectify that. I’ll go convince Jewel Staite myself though.

        • MynameisBlarney

          Adam Baldwin can stay the fuck home though.

          • Suttree

            He is a stupid jackass. That’s why he was perfect to play Jayne.

          • MizzMazz

            I wondered if the others waited until he was just out of earshot, and then started chuckling about him and talking shit.

    • MynameisBlarney

      Religion.

      • Good_Gawd_Yall

        OH, THIS. How could I have left this one off? Thank you, brother Blarney!

    • Suttree

      Pants!

      • MynameisBlarney

        late 70’s and early 80’s fashion

    • willi0000000
  • PubOption

    Hook, line and Zinke – good one Dok.

  • susan_g

    Anyone who hates the eagles has to get out of the fuckin’ cab, er, plane. That means you, Zinky.

  • Mary Theresa
  • calliecallie

    Lead ammunition doesn’t kill eagles. People do.
    Wait, what? Aren’t eagles on the endangered species list?

    • Cat Cafe

      I mean, aren’t they the VERY SYMBOL OF AMERICA???

      • Suttree

        blah blah blah. Does this involve black people disrespecting eagles? Ok, then shut up about it already!

      • ariel_gee_398

        Yes, so why shouldn’t our addiction to shooting things be killing them, too?

      • Dudleydidwrong

        The symbol of Amercia is Ayn Rand’s picture on a $1000 bill.

      • keinsignal

        do you mean the eagles or the guns

    • No. They have made an amazing comeback

      • ariel_gee_398

        “Hold my beer.” – Trump administration.

        • Perzactly. Secondary poisoning is a horrible thing

  • Humans have known lead poisions people animals and water since roman times.
    2000 years of but it is cheaper!!!

  • Anna Rompage

    Maybe that’s why so many folks who like guns are a few fries short of a happy meal, they’ve been lead poisoned….

    • keinsignal

      You’re joking, I presume, but you’re not wrong. If you’re shooting at an indoor range, you’re in an environment that’s teeming with microscopic particles of airborne lead dust. It would take a long time to build up a significant dose, but some of these people have definitely put in the hours.

  • Wild Cat
  • Bill D. Burger

    It’s obviously payback. Eagles love their country and supported Hillary.

    https://media.giphy.com/media/iTCNyaEpsEg5G/source.gif

    • SDGeoff3

      I knew someone would come through with this beloved gif.

  • RobKanC

    Ok. Time out. Do we really want bald eagles to be our national bird anymore. They can’t even hunt ffs. He just steals food from other hunters. He is as crooked as they come. Wait a minute. Well, he does represent us perfectly, carry on then.

  • MynameisBlarney
  • Lance Thrustwell

    Ammunition in general IS where gun control should be headed. Getting all the guns (handguns, assault rifles) off the streets and out of the homes is a motherfucker; might be undoable. But if we can just choke off the flow of ammunition – that shit runs out. Every box of ammo should be entered into a database – who it was sold to, on what date, and excessive purchases should be looked at verry closely.

    • jesterpunk
      • Lance Thrustwell

        Yup, exactly. Man’s a genius.

    • Crank Tango

      It’s harder to buy sudafed than ammo.

      • Eileen Besse

        NO SHIT.

      • Covfefe

        Ain’t no Amendment gives you the right to health care.

      • Good_Gawd_Yall

        It’s really hard to buy ammo when the wingnuts get riled up about “Obummer’s takin’ all our gunz!!11!!” and run out and buy it all up. Then the gun stores sometimes put restrictions on how much you can buy. Mass-casualty shootings, OTOH? Go ahead an’ stock up, Billy Joe Bob Greg. They’re gonna pass a law makin’ it illeagle to defend yourself any. day. now.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Must be tens of billions of rounds out there… if it all gets used, we have a real problem.
      It does get old, eventually. Anybody know the half-life of typical gun-nut-level ammo?

      • Lance Thrustwell

        bullet kept dry & cool will last 20-30 years. Kept in a hot shed in humid Mississippi summers… probably more like 5-10.

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          That’s doable, then! We’ll have “patriot” nutbags running around with dubious ammo for a century or two, but as time goes on they become more of a joke and less of an actual threat. I wonder what fraction of prepper bunkers are air-conditioned.

        • georgiaburning

          True military ammo boxes will keep the humidity out for many years. The plastic copies and Chinese versions maybe not so good.

    • Eileen Besse

      THAT’S an idea….

      • Lance Thrustwell

        Borrowed & adapted from Chris Rock.

  • therblig

    i guess the republicans like ill eagles after all.

  • Bill D. Burger

    Many eagles have died of broken hearts, shame and humiliation since last November.

    https://images.dailykos.com/images/419909/story_image/long_hanging_eagle.png?1499005449

  • jesterpunk

    But if they kill all the eagles then what will fly into the room when the conservative shows up a liberal professor?

  • Bill D. Burger

    ot___Surra’ Hildebeast Sanders just said, and I’m still laughing, that, “Now we know that there was no collusion between the Trump campaign and Russia. The collusion was between Clinton and the Russians.”

    Goddamned if the idiots won’t say anything and the howler monkeys who follow them eat that mendacious swill and ask for more. Unbelievable.

    Hey Surra’, Mouthpiece of Donny, know who isn’t paying attention to your nonsense? That’s right…..Bob Mueller.

    • cmd resistor

      Does she look like she did something very odd with the eye makeup today?

      • Bill D. Burger

        Hard to tell. Those orbs move chameleon-like, each in its own direction.

        • cmd resistor

          It’s not as obvious now. When she first got up there today, it was like Halloween makeup when she closed her eyelids. LIke the eyeshadow was dark brown and seemed to be painted on not the whole eyelid. I was watching w/o sound so had time to look at it. Maybe just weird lighting.

    • Eileen Besse

      Does she read Wonkette, and was she repeating our sarcasm?

      • Bill D. Burger

        “Not a colluder’! Not a colluder’! You’re the colluder’!”

        That seems to be the dead horse meme they intend to beat now.

        • puredog

          Donnie’s not just a colluder — he’s a Large Hadron Colluder.

  • Zonath

    This administration simply will not rest until the number of Bald Eagles in existence equals the number of Scotland’s national animal in existence.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      I had no idea Scotland’s national animal was the T. Rex. The things you learn on Wonkette!

    • BrianW

      Nessie’s dead? Son of a bitch!

  • JohnBull

    If you took a poll of 100 conservatives asking about their favorite bird, 99 would say the bald eagle. Not one of them gives a shit about protecting their environment, or at least that’s how they vote.
    The symbol-mindedness of these people is just jarring.

    • Strepsi

      and also they hate Obama, but just because Obama signed a thing doesn’t mean the thing was wrong…. of course there are MANY other materials than led to make ammunition and fishing weights from, but capitalism. And “because capitalism” is still a better reason than the NRA whole-cloth bullshit.
      I hate news.

      • jesterpunk

        But they are against anything Obama was for because reasons. Obama needs to come out in favor of breathing.

        • Eileen Besse

          Please, yes!

    • FukuiSanYesOta

      The scapegoat.

      Also my spirit animal btw

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    The biggest hzard isn’t lead, it’s zinke.

  • HogeyeGrex

    Just in case the Whitefish grift isn’t making everyone stabby enough, I thought I’d post this little tidbit about a Georgia elections server being whoopsie wiped clean right after a lawsuit was filed regarding it.
    https://apnews.com/877ee1015f1c43f1965f63538b035d3f/APNewsBreak:-Georgia-election-server-wiped-after-suit-filed
    Georgia was home to at least one hotly contested House race that squeaked barely Republican. Coinkydink?

  • Dudleydidwrong

    I’m having a confused. Does Zinke and the rest of this mal-administration have shit for brains or lead for brains? And will this question be on the exam?

    • jesterpunk

      Yes and Yes.

    • SeeTrain65

      And Is it multiple choice or essay question?

  • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

    C’mon who needs eagles anyway? We can create holograms of them. But they won’t try to claw Donnie’s eyes out.

    • cmd resistor

      All we need is the crying eagle photos.

    • Zonath

      The question you present sort of answers itself.

  • beingreleased

    Speaking of Zinke:

    There are two ways this might play out:
    (a) They are throwing Zinke under the bus
    2. “Trump had nothing to do with this.” -> meetings between the White House and Whitefish are revealed -> “We were just talking about fishing” -> emails from Whitefish offering kickbacks to various Trumps -> “Well, of course we gave them the contract. Anyone would have done that.”

    https://twitter.com/ElizLanders/status/923983819539132416

    • OutOfOrbit

      nothing will be done

    • Covfefe

      If they haven’t said it yet, some libruls are going to say Donald gets a piece of whatever Zinke gets.

      • Spurning Beer

        A lot of people are saying that….

      • Raan

        Gotta kick up to the Capo.

        • puredog

          “I just want to wet my beak.”

  • cloudbase

    As someone who hunts for 100% of the meat I eat and prepare at home (and for friends and family I give venison to), being able to make clean, quick, ethical shots is absolutely essential. Part of that has to do with the performance of the hunting bullet. The bullets I shoot are copper jacketed lead that are designed to fragment in a way that ensures the animal is killed as close to instantaneously as possible, even with less-than-ideal shot placement.

    Currently, the all-copper bullets that are available on the market do not function in that manner, and I would not trust them to do their job effectively. I don’t want to kill eagles, but I don’t want to wound and lose deer/elk/antelope either.

    Also, there is a far greater likelihood that the gut pile I leave in the field is scavenged by coyotes than eagles (I’m located in SW Montana).

    I’m also not a rich MFer who has private land to hunt on – the vast majority of what I hunt is FS or BLM land, with some MT State land mixed in. This is a conundrum. I don’t buy meat at the grocery store (aside from the occasional pack of bacon). But I try to be the best steward of the land that I can be. I clean up other people’s litter and report violations of OHV use and try to educate folks around me. But until the manufacturers come up with a reliable, effective lead-free hunting bullet for the caliber of hunting rifles I own, I have to shoot lead ammunition.

    • OutOfOrbit

      i donut believe it

      • cloudbase

        Should I take a picture of my two chest freezers for you? They’re a little on the empty side right now because rifle season just started so most of last year’s meat has been eaten and I’ve only gotten an antelope doe so far to fill it.

        BTW, I am ashamed that Zinke is from my state, I had better hopes for him but…ugh, repubs are all the same, no matter where they come from, I guess.

    • Sheepshagger

      It is a tough one. There’s a reason lead got used since the invention of firearms. I’m pretty sure you could get a non lead alternative for most calibers tho.

      • Arolpin

        We’ve been using steel shot rather than lead shot to hunt waterfowl (i.e. ducks & geese) in the US since the ’80s. I would be fine with allowing lead bullets in rifle ammunition,while hunting, because you shoot much less often hunting big game vs. wildfowl.

        • Old Nick

          I’ve seen 4 eagles on a moose gut pile. One fragmented bullet could kill them all. Lead ammo is obsolete and unconscionable. Thanks for using steel on waterfowl. The loons have enough problems. Hevi-shot is more expensive but sure works great.

    • Old Nick

      If you can’t make a clean kill on an elk, deer or antelope with a Barnes Triple Shock all copper bullet you are either shooting the wrong caliber or a lousy shot. If you can’t buy a copper loaded bullet, load it yourself. Your post sounds as though you have not even tried using wildlife safe ammo. Give the wildlife a break.

      • cloudbase

        I’m far from a lousy shot – all 12 tags I’ve cut with my 6.5×47 Lapua since I built it three years ago have been one shot kills, from 40 to 510 yards. I hand load with Berger 140gr VLDs. All the copper bullets on the market have abysmal ballistic coefficients – the reason I shoot the caliber and bullet I do is because combined with a TON of practice (I’m not one of those irresponsible assholes that only shoots their rifle once a year to sight it in before hunting) superior BC translates to smaller groups, more accurate shots, and more killing power when the bullet gets there. I’ll admit I’m pretty “new school” when it comes to my rifles. But I’ve watched others with more traditional setups and subpar bullets wound animals and have them walk out of their lives.

        I’ll admit, I’m researching all copper bullets as we speak. Some of the custom lathe turned ones are pretty intriguing, but I’m truly afraid to find out they’re ineffective by being the one to wound and lose an animal.

        • Old Nick

          Thanks for being willing to research. Don’t get hung up on BC. You sound like an informed shooter so you probably know that the same load will perform differently in different rifles. Of course, powder load is crucial, too. My son and I went through many loads of different powders to find that sweet, tight group. Please decide what to use based on the groups you shoot at the elevation where you hunt in your rifle of choice, but give non-lead bullets a chance.

  • cmd resistor
  • Daniel

    The writer for this year is very heavy handed with their metaphors.

    • OutOfOrbit

      metaphors metafives medafux

  • beingreleased
  • whitroth

    Oh, *that’s* how they get lead poisoning: some Brave Hunter, drinking heavily, has shot and wounded a critter, and let’s it get away to die somewhere, or else the Brave Hunter shoots a deer or whatever, cuts the horns off to show how Great A Hunter he is, and leaves the carcass to rot.

    Many years ago, my son got me a great video game, Deer Avenger. You’re the deer, and you get to choose your weapon, from slingshot with deer pellet to M-16. After you shoot the hunter, it shows you sitting in your den, with hunters’ heads on the wall….

    • SeeTrain65

      “Hunter Hunter” would have been too on-the-nose.

      • Raan

        I think that’s an anime.

        • SeeTrain65

          And if it’s not, it will be.

          • MynameisBlarney

            And it will be tentacle pronz anime because of reasons.

    • Bill D. Burger

      They’ve discovered Mayan deer did the same thing!

      I saw it on the innertubes’. It’s true.

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/201df6a4f6aff3d297cac94e83379863bb698a0f7ccddca98aeae1143f0472d8.jpg

    • Sheepshagger

      Lots of people live off what they hunt. The rural faction of my family are poor as dirt and would probably go hungry if they didn’t get their own out of the bush. Not all hunters are gun nut fat fucks.

    • cloudbase

      I’m a proud Democrat, feminist, dog mom, and a hunter. As I type this, there is the antlered skull of a mule deer hanging over my computer, and big slab of black bear pastrami in the mini fridge next to my desk. I’m more proud of the pastrami than the antlers (and boy am I glad I bought a real smoker), but they’re both cherished. Hunting in the west is a lot of hard work, and on numerous occasions I’ve been called to hike half my body weight in meat and gear for long miles. I don’t do it because I enjoy killing things or to show off to others. I do it because it’s clean, lean, healthy meat and it asks of me that I become an active part of my environment and the wilderness, not merely a spectator of it. There are more of us than there are of wasteful assholes – trust me.

      • Red Bird

        If you say so. I used to work with an office full of ammo sexuals who openly admitted that they didn’t eat the meat they hunted. They just like the kill. Liked the pictures.

        • Rasilom

          Those people are assholes. I eat lots of game meat. It is amazing. Thing is to follow the native tradition of only taking what you need and respecting the animal that gave it. Not much pisses me off more than trophy hunting. That there be bullshit.

        • cloudbase

          That is awful. Though there are a lot of people who claim they don’t like the taste of venison, but it’s because they’re taking care of the meat incorrectly. None of the meat in my freezer (mule deer, whitetail, antelope, elk, black bear) is “gamey” tasting, because the instant that animal hits the ground, I break it down into skinned quarters and get the meat in a cooler on ice, then butcher it (pack and freeze) as soon as I am able, within a day or two (depending on how far I am from civilization and/or my house). SO MANY DUDES just gut their deer and drag them out, drive around with it in the truck to show all their buddies, then hang them in the garage for two weeks to “age” (read: rot). Not getting the meat cooled quickly is what makes gamey funk, and so their wives will refuse to cook or eat it and they just chalk it up to how deer taste.

      • puredog

        Do you pack out the guts? And/or use steel shot? (Neither of which questions I would have known enough to ask before reading this article.)

        • cloudbase

          I take the heart, liver, caul fat, and occasionally the kidneys, but leave the stomach, intestines, lungs, and bladder. There is no way to effectively “pack out” the stomach and intestines without risking the contamination (and subsequent waste) of the edible meat. I don’t use steel shot or any shot, because I do not hunt animals with a shotgun. I use copper jacketed lead core bullets in my rifle, because they are proven to be the most ethical method for dispatching an animal in a single shot. On that point, you can read the following (though be forewarned, it does contain numerous images of lungs and vital organs from shot animals for illustrative purposes, so it is not for the squeamish)
          https://www.ballisticstudies.com/Knowledgebase/Homogenous+copper+bullets+can+be+inhumane.html

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Mostly it’s from deer guts. Hunters dress the deer in the field, and take home the carcass, leaving the guts for “Nature” to take care of. Eagles aren’t proud; they love that shit.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Mmmm. Deer sushi.

    • cloudbase

      Oh also, in regards to “takes the head and leaves the carcass to rot”: that is illegal in every state in the country, recognized as “waste of game”. If they are caught, they are subject to hefty fines and loss of hunting privileges (and that loss is often honored across state lines, so if you lose your ability to get a hunting license in Montana because of a violation, you can’t buy a license in Idaho either, etc).

  • MynameisBlarney
    • SeeTrain65

      “My unique perspective is being another young dumb privileged white neckbeard.”

    • mackafritz

      He’s the uniquest white man to ever run for office.

    • Bill D. Burger

      His unique perspective ensures that his white privilege remains unchallenged.

    • Beanz&Berryz

      I think he doesn’t know what unique means.

    • Yellerduck

      The “most unique”, huh? Uniquer than all the other unique things? The epitomiest of epitomies?

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Pretty average uniqueness, IMO — 60th percentile at best.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Mo’ ‘nique.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Correction: Being a white male gives you a lot less perspective on what it’s like to be a woman or person of color. Apparently.

      I’m a white male and it sure seems to be the case.

  • Cornelius Fussbudget

    This is Trump’s plan to defeat North Korea. He will pump the eagles full of lead until they will attack anything on sight, and then release them in the DMZ during winter so they go north. Foolproof plan, and what’s more American than a cloud of crazed bald eagles descending to eat your face? Maybe he can get them little uniforms decorated with the stars and stripes!

  • An Outhouse for the résistance

    Bald eagles have become a common sight in NY state recently. I hope states can still ban lead on state land.

    • One of the best places to see them in the winter is Fleischmann’s Pier, near the Indian Point nuke plant, oddly enough.

      • sarafina

        The plant probably has open water nearby. Eagles like open water. Of course, they may glow in the dark after eating the fish, but things happen.

      • Yellerduck

        That’s where you can see the ones with the most eyes!

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Reliable thermals above the cooling towers!

    • Rasilom

      Living in AK bald eagles are thick as flys on shit. They are basically scavengers. They used to be my fav bird a long time ago. Now its Ravens. Still scavengers true, but I have yet to see an eagle trolling a cat by walking around meowing at it. A behavior that the Ravens near a friend house regulalry perform. It is funny as all fuck.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Ravens are super-smart critters. They learn to use tools, and can figure out how undo fairly complicated “locks” on a food container.
        Probably can do math better than some GOP politicians.

        • Rasilom

          TBH a one eyed chimp with a traumatic brain injury is probly better at math than most in the GOP…..

      • TundraGrifter

        We had a neighbor totally freaked out by a couple of murders of crows in the neighborhood. She was convinced they were after her baby. One afternoon we saw her out in the street, dressed in a bathrobe, waving a broom at the birds. Not too long after that the family moved away.

      • Zyxomma

        I adore corvids. We get crows in NYC, but no ravens. I adore them.

    • Rocket Pony Ron

      Some have colonised the cliffs on the north shore of Lake Erie. No hunting around here.

  • bubbuhh

    Speaking of Zinke, Teh FDA Has Approved Smaller Condoms For US Men
    cuz smaller condoms make dick jokes like Zinke seem bigger

    https://www.rawstory.com/2017/10/fda-approves-smaller-condoms-for-us-men-because-average-size-was-too-big/

    • Beanz&Berryz

      Let the sizing inflation begin… Start with the little ones being called “large”…

      • Yellerduck

        That’s always been my go-to!

        • Beanz&Berryz

          It’s yoogely successful in some quarters

      • Raan

        When does Sweetums introduce the 512-oz “Child” size cup?

      • ZangoCrudmonger

        Ah yes, the Starbucks sizes should work here, too. I’m extra grande, if ya know what I mean.

        ‘Cuz I sure don’t.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Because, well, who wants to ask the clerk for a box of “small” condoms?
        I vote for the system the use for olives. I think they start at “large”, then somewhere along the line is “jumbo”, and I know there’s “colossal”.
        Ordering a dozen “colossal” condoms would be a matter of pride to some, I’m sure.

        • Beanz&Berryz

          Even if they fell off right away… The ordering would be awesome!

        • Resistor Radio

          Probably gonna wanna avoid the jalapeño-stuffed ones, no matter the size.

      • Magyar Has Had It Up To Here

        Funny thing… The “Beyoind 7” condom, which you would think only fit 8″s and over is actually the smallest condom on the American market.

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          Metric system, obvs.

        • Beanz&Berryz

          Beyond 7! (cm)

      • Zyxomma

        Like olives and shrimp.

    • Rasilom

      Problem is that every time I buy the xxl condoms they are to small for my peen. With the new sizing comming on line I is gonna have to buy the xxxxxxxl size. Damn it! Where does the madness end?!?!?!?!?!?!

      • Raan

        Someone needs monster condoms for their Magnum dong.

        ALTERNATE JOKE: Sizes coming soon – Huge, Gigantic, Titanic, and “Omigod, It’s Coming This Way”

        • Rasilom

          Ok, you now owe me a keyboard as my current one is covered in Jameson from my spit take!

        • Msgr_MΩment

          “OMG, that looks like a penis only smaller” size will be flying off the shelves.

      • puredog

        Hey, buddy — Wonkette ain’t no singles bar. Move along.

        • Rasilom

          Oh I know that. Its a poney emporium and dick joke factory. Please forgive if I offended. Its just Daymm has things gotten so bad in society that we need to change the size labels on rubbers to boost the idiot brigades opinion of themselves?

      • Grumpy Twat
    • Rocket Pony Ron

      Is that anything to do with a size XL, which used to mean 48″ waist, now being 44″-46″?

    • BreakingDeadMen

      Condom tailor is a new job title. Watch out for the needle…you might feel a little prick

      • bubbuhh

        LOLZ

  • Saxo the Grammarian

    Wait. Does Zinke hate the sportsball team or the band?

    • Rasilom

      AOT’K

      • Raan

        “The Gang Kidnaps Zinke”

  • WotsAllThisThen

    Lead poisoning makes the eagles more likely to vote for Trump. That’s just science, man.

  • Viktor

    It’s another case of the Donald’s revenge. Just like football is feeling his wrath for not letting him buy a team, now he is going after eagles, after the most patriotic eagle, with the biggest eagle balls ever, tried to attack Mr. Trump during a photo shoot. We salute you brave eagle.

    • TundraGrifter

      I watched the “30 for 30” titled “Small Potatoes – Who Killed the USFL?” Of course, the answer is the absolutely astonishingly arrogant and stupid Donald J. Trump. He sued the NFL like a common Al Davis. For all his (endless) faults, Mr. Davis forced a merger between the NFL and the AFL. For all his (nonexistent) skills, Mr. Trump won damages of $1, trebled for punitive reasons, and another $.76 interest before it was paid. Apparently the NFL gave him the finger by dragging out sending the check. Bottom Line: Too Much Winning!

  • Wonkaholic

    What part of “ill eagles” don’t they understand?!?11?

  • Wuulf
  • Msgr_MΩment
  • Resistor Radio

    Bald eagles are awesome and Ryan Zinke is a twat.

    • Zyxomma

      Twat LIBELZ!!1!!!!!!

      • Resistor Radio

        I deserved that

        • Grumpy Twat

          Yes, you did!

  • Dude, sometimes you eat the bear, sometimes he eats you, and sometimes he dies of lead poisoning from eating deer guts.

    • Moar Wordz

      Pore Bare

  • Courser_Resistance

    Jeebus what a stupid. My dad switched to steel shot back in the 70’s. Lots of places require it. It’s just one of those ‘fuck you’ to Obama’s legacy. Most hunters have been using steel shot forever.

  • John Lo

    I hate us …

  • VirginiaMorningBlend

    Hell! Now I’m gonna have to pick out all the lead shot from my Bald Eagle before roasting it this Thanksgiving. With the steel shot you just let the kids break their teeth.

  • Ron Spangler

    I’ll have a GUT PILE, please. With extra lead!

  • AJ Milne

    ‘Yr Wonkette has so far been unable to confirm the rumor we just started that Secretary Zinke owns a stake in several manufacturers of lead ammunition.’

    Oh. Also a solid hypothesis…

    …me, I was figuring he gets mining royalties when they extract the raw ore from between his ears.

    • Moar Wordz

      Bwahahaaaaaaa !

  • ken_kukec

    Zinke hates the Eagles? In that case, I wouldn’t hold out much hope for the tape deck … or the Credence.

  • Geez, what’s Ryan’s problem ? I mean I know that Hotel California doesn’t appeal to everyone but…why are you looking at me that way?

  • Keith Taylor

    Cripes.
    As Bill Maher said once on this subject, “The bald eagle. You know … the symbol of our fucking COUNTRY. Before it was replaced by a trucker hat.”

  • KKSD

    Quick question as an ardent non-hunter: Is lead ammo in away more effective than a less poisonous option? What’s the underlying need for it?

    • HarpyLibtart

      I believe it’s just cheap.

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