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Eugene, Oregon, and sloe gin fizz! Or Eugene, Oregon, and this pitcher of beer I am buying you TONIGHT, at Whirled Pies, 199 W. Eighth Ave., where I am also buying you pizza because I am totally like that, and we’re NOT meeting at Armitage Park, because it’s supposed to rain!

We shall see you there from 5 to 8, and there will even be beautiful music, because life and this halfway-vacation I am on are both WONDERFUL!

Speaking of WONDERFUL, look at this penis on my head in Boise! No, not Doktor Zoom.

There were a dozen sexy wonkers there, some who had driven HOURS from Buttfuck, Idaho, to bask in us. So Eugene, you have big clown shoes to fill!

Sacramento, you are on deck for Saturday, 4 to 9, at East Portal Park (we got booze permits!).

And Sonoma, my loves, we are on for Sunday pot luck, 3 to 6 p.m., at the town plaza. In case of rain, we’ll meet up at Mary’s Pizza, which is just right there. I will bring you IMPEACH hats and kisses.

Then we’re on to Avila Beach, Santa Barbara, Orange County, LA, San Diego, and Big Bear! Followed by Las Vegas and Salt Lake City and Helena and maybe OUR HOUSE! (Not our house.)

Keep watching the story linked in the sidebar for further details!

Gas, grass or ass. Mostly gas and grass though.

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