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Hello! And welcome to your weekly update of all the garbage things happening in the MANOSPHERE and beyond!

This week, the MGTOWs have some thoughts about the Harvey Weinstein scandal. For the unhep, MGTOW stands for “Men Going Their Own Way.” They are a group of men who hate women so much they have decided that the only thing left to do is to avoid us! Which we are fine with! But they sure do spend a whole lot of time whining about us and how evil we are.

This week, they’ve had a lot to say about the Harvey Weinstein scandal, and — as you might imagine — their take is slightly different from the take anyone else has on the subject.

One MGTOW, Zombocom1911, lamented the fact that Weinstein was heard “begging” for sex on the tapes, and wondered WHAT EVEN IS THE POINT OF ANYTHING if someone that rich and powerful has to grovel for sex like a common?

What is the fucking point of being that rich (net worth $255 million) and powerful (can cast anyone he wants in films with A-list celebs), if you still have to beg and grovel like this audio recording of his? What the fuck? pathetic. IF I had 1/100th of his fortune, I could be living like a absolute king in any number of countries.

In the comments on that post, a fellow MGTOW with the charming user name of “nofilmynofucky” (There’s a whole fun MRA thing where they say they will only have sex with women if it’s being filmed, so she can’t accuse them of rape later) shared his disappointment that the women sexually harassed by Weinstein were not being charged for prostitution:

Those women are literal prostitutes, pure and simple.
As with every instance of prostitution, a price must be negotiated beforehand. Weinstein happens to be enormously unattractive, so this negotiation is more difficult for him than one would assume based solely on his net worth/level of power.
At the end of the day though: he still fucked all those whores, so regardless of his negotiation tactics, he still ‘won’ in the end.
they’re just a bunch of disgusting degenerates willing to bend over and take a few pumps in exchange for money: nothing more, nothing less. Weinstein is undeniably piece of shit but that does not make these whores into victims. They made their choice, did very well out of the deal and deserve no sympathy.
Frankly, if they live in an area where prostitution is illegal, they should be charged accordingly.

In another post, titled “Free Harvey Weinstein,” another MGTOW argued that he’d done nothing wrong, and the women he harassed were “beasts” trying to take him down for no good reason.

People without power and money cannot understand how women act and dress around those who have it…they see an opportunity to knock someone down to their level and its like a hungry beast at a buffet…sure he was inappropriate but does he deserve all of this?

Then there was another post about how it was UNFAIR for Ashley Judd to have said such mean things about Donald Trump’s pussy-grabbing when she had never told anyone about Harvey Weinstein harassing her. This, the MGTOWs concluded, was because Weinstein is Jewish.

The MGTOWs, of course, were not the only ones with gross things to say about the Weinstein scandal. As David Futrelle highlighted earlier this week, A Voice For Men founder Paul Elam wrote a charming essay suggesting that everything that went down in the scandal part of an unspoken social contract in which women trade what’s between their legs for a man’s power and money, and the real victims here are men, and the women who never made it onto Weinstein’s casting couch.

Now, women using sex to get power meets with little or no criticism in modern times. By hook or crook, they can swallow and get paid for it and it bothers exactly no one. Men usually won’t complain because their main objective is sex.

But on the other side of this longstanding social contract, men don’t enjoy the same social laxness. They are vulnerable when participating in the same, exact arrangement. Even years down the road the women who willingly and aggressively pursue using sex to gain power from men can suddenly and successfully paint themselves in the light of victim and cash in a second time, usually to much more painful effect.

Oh! Those poor men! And also the women who can’t get ahead through fellatio. Pun definitely not intended.

However, I also won’t choose to ignore that every time a woman gets a promotion or a raise from fellating her boss, someone else, probably someone harder working and more deserving, gets left out in the cold. Often, it’s other women who are less attractive, or who won’t suck dick for an edge at work.

I don’t know if I can say this commentary is actually worse than Harvey Weinstein, but it comes about as close as you can get.

And now that you are sufficiently grossed out… YOUR OPEN THREAD!

[Reddit]

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  • Carpe Vagenda
    • The Wanderer

      The Normans invade the 100-Acre Wood?

      • Anna Elizabeth

        There should be a Crossover between Pooh and ST:TNG, then Commander Riker could get stuck in the tree whilst trying to get the Honey.

        • The Wanderer

          So let it be written, so let it be done:

          http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1182394/

          • Anna Elizabeth

            AWE-sum! :D

            ETA – Tigger at NAV! He’s about to push for Warp Speed! xD

          • The Wanderer

            Jim Groat’s one of the OG furry artists.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I’m familiar with him, the friends I had in the Furry community introdiced me to his work. :)

          • The Wanderer

            I hit him up for commissions when I’m at cons.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Nice! :D

          • redarmyzombie

            Okay, this is the best thing I’ve seen and am going to see all day.

        • leemoder

          A transporter malfunction splits off Tom Riker from Will, leaving poor Tom forever trapped within the tree anBOOOMM!

          • Anna Elizabeth

            :) Bev told Riker he needed to trim down a bit.

      • ltmcdies
        • The Wanderer

          The local paper in the Hastings area used to publish an obituary for Harold Godwinson every October 14th. National Geographic highlighted it in their 1966 magazine for the article on the 900th anniversary.

        • Blanche de Shambles

          Anglo-Saxon bingo:

          “Who needs an I?”

          “KING HAROLD GODWINSON!”

          • ltmcdies

            (((applause))))……..

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Bother, sayyeth Poohe

    • I have a Tshirt that is TARDIS in the middle of the Bayeux tapestry and the latin above is Bad Wolf

  • UnsaltedSinner

    Obligatory “Men Going Their Own Way” song:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ACKZ10BrSwk

  • Jeffocaster in the West

    Men going their own way means that they have to declare this because they 1) can’t get a date 2) think of women as something conquer 3) May be homosexuals but can’t cope with it (not that being homosexual is bad, they couldn’t get man dates, either) 4) stuck on the 6th level of Zelda or whatever that game is called 5) Live in their Mom’s basement because they need their diapers changed. 6) Voted for Trump thinking it would bring them dates with right wingers like Victoria Jackson……

    • Three Finger Salute

      They hate Obamacare because they’re opposed to individual man dates.

      • Riley Whodat Venable

        They seem to like Trump’s man date. They talk about it all the time.

  • bubbuhh

    Zombocom1911 sounds like Eric Trump

  • TJ Barke

    If these men are going their own way, why do they keep blathering about women?

    • bubbuhh

      Their way is very whiny.

      • The Wanderer

        The Tao of the Failure.

        • tomamitai

          The Tao of poo.

    • The Wanderer

      Assholes can’t help it.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      We’d never know they were Going if they didn’t Stay to tell us.

      • bbayliss

        Ha!

      • Gayer Than Thou

        Seriously – if you’re going, then hurry up and go!

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Right?

          They know they wont be missed -or noticed – so they keep telling us they are GTOW.

        • FlownΩver

          As Ma FlΩwn used to say, “Here’s your hat… what’s your hurry?”

    • WIDTAP

      Maybe the beer ran out?

    • Sophia

      They are like the child who is mad at their mommy and keeps saying “I’m running away!”

  • Boojum

    You know, Title VII doesn’t actually protect women who won’t suck dick, if the woman who does gets a promotion. Fucked up, that.

  • UnsaltedSinner
    • JustDon’tSayConfabulation

      Pfft. Were they even playing the National Anthem?

    • Jgb979

      HOW DARE THEY DISREPECT THE STAR SPANGLED BANN…..wait

      When even the Germans are like “maybe cool it on the nationalism?”

      • Three Finger Salute

        Ours might as well be Doucheland Uber Alles.

        • Riley Whodat Venable

          I think you mean Doucheland Unter Ailes.

    • FukuiSanYesOta

      Fun fact: Hertha Berlin play in the 1936 Berlin Olympic stadium.

      Also, they kind of suck. But this is cool.

  • puredog

    Judah_Earl complains about being “demonized for being successful.” I’d give a few bucks (not to him, though) to see a copy of his C.V.

    • Edith Prickly

      He quit what few jobs are on there because “everyone else was an asshole.”

  • WIDTAP

    Now is a good time to invoke the Steve Trevor Principle. Don’t Assume.

    https://youtu.be/YTg7Xts4sak?t=22

  • memzilla Ω

    Robyn, you have achieved the style of writing this subject so richly deserves. It’s the literary equivalent of cleaning the gutters and writing about what you throw down into the yard: a stinking, slimy handful of rotting biomatter, speckled with the eggs of a flying blood-parasite. And the tool you use is the same one that Frank Capra used in the Why We Fight series: you merely use these people’s own words and images to describe them.

    • JustDon’tSayConfabulation

      Seconded.

  • Shanzgood

    I posted this yesterday but this article seems like a good place to leave it again.

    About consent and women’s desire.

    https://longreads.com/2017/10/10/the-horizon-of-desire/

    • Anna Elizabeth

      This. All of it.

      I’ve had men fade when I pointed out one-way-or-another that I like sex. I guess I’m supposed to be available and skilled without admitting it? To Hell with that.

      • Shanzgood

        And still so much assumed to be of a transactionary nature.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          That too. We couldn’t possibly enjoy the act, the company, it’s a trade. “If I buy *this* , she’ll do “that”. Or even “if I own *this* (car, job, status symbol) she’ll want me.”

        • ButtercuptheHarelessRabbit

          Yeah, sex is considered something men do to women, rather than something 2 people (or more – not judging) do together.

      • WIDTAP

        Of course – per these gentlemen, you must be the perfect combination of slut and the Madonna.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Yeah. Let me tell you, my idea of consenting is when I say “Would you like to have sex?”

          One guy and I had the most marvelous time, the other faded as fast as he could. Both were invited in to my home after hitting on me.

        • Three Finger Salute

          So… Madonna?

    • OutOfOrbit

      i went there & the next article was about sexy-times spanking!

    • Hemp Dogbane

      Thanks for posting this link, Shanz. It really hits on things I’ve been thinking about & talking about with my gf recently. Not to mention what’s going on in the entire world.

  • puredog

    I’m trying to place the movie in which someone travels through some portal into another dimension/reality, with a rope attached around his/her waist so as to pull him/her back in case of danger, and the rope breaks. Calamity ensues. (There may be many such plots.) Anyway, I always picture Robyn with a protective rope around her waist when she ventures into these toxic environs.
    ETA: Of the answers so far, the most plausible is Stranger Things, since my memory is shot and the others are farther in the past. Like I say, it may be an oft-used meme.

    • Blanche de Shambles

      Time Bandits?

      • grindstone

        The only movie ever with a telecommunications joke. We are not a humorous industry.

    • Wonky Magoo

      The Simpsons?

      • Plaid Paisley

        I was thinking of that one as well

    • Plaid Paisley

      Poltergeist? But no hilarity

      • Bad Tom

        Well, I, for one, thought it was pretty fucking funny that this suburban family, who built their beautiful McMansion on an Indian graveyard ends up having said McMansion sucked into the Nether World contained in the Master Bedroom Walk-in Closet.

        Nothing good lurks inside any suburban Master Bedroom Walk-in Closet.

        • Riley Whodat Venable

          This whole country is built on an Indian burial ground. I think that explains a lot.

          • Ill-Advised

            There’s a section of Route 22 where I swear the forest is angry. I got so creeped out that I turned around and back-tracked 40 miles, in snow, and rerouted via I-5.

            Still don’t know what bothered me so. Superstition, premonition, or self-fulfilling prophecy, I could not make myself drive into the forest.

    • OutOfOrbit

      is this a bondage fantasy? yes it is

    • Shanzgood

      Stranger Things?

      • OutOfOrbit

        season 2 gettin close

    • Jgb979

      That show from the 90’s with jerry o’Connell?

      • Shanzgood

        Sliders!

    • WIDTAP

      Leela rescuing the Planet Express ship crew from the Fountain of Aging?

    • Canis Greyhame
    • Canis Greyhame
      • WIDTAP

        Wait a sec, is that the cabin having tentacle sex with Ash?

        • Canis Greyhame

          Just visualizing what it’s like to delve too deeply into the manosphere. I’d imagine the ToS for using 8chan probably reads like a passage from the Necronomicon Ex-Mortis.

      • The Wanderer

        I’ve seen enough tentacle hentai to know where this will be going.

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      A Connecticut Yank in King Arthur’s Court?

    • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

      Poltergeist?

    • FlownΩver

      My Dinner With Andre?

      …well, maybe not.

  • Jgb979

    The HW scandal for most cons, even the ones that don’t live in their parents basement, was never “gross rapist sex monster” it was “liberals claim to hate gross rapist sex monsters and one of their own is a gross rapist sex monster lolz!”

    They all love and wish they were gross rapist sex monsters.

    These are the same people who let Donald Trump speak at family values conventions

    • Three Finger Salute

      They only hate ISIS because they’re jealous of the competition.

  • shart of turin

    Hard to believe these dudes aren’t getting laid, innit?

    • Nasty Girl Brianna

      Self awareness is not their strong suit.

  • bbayliss

    “It is no longer possible to safely ignore the leaked cries for help coming from within the administration. They reveal a president raging against enemies, obsessed by slights, deeply uninformed and incurious, unable to focus, and subject to destructive whims. A main task of the chief of staff seems to be to shield him from dinner guests and telephone calls that might set him off on a foolish or dangerous tangent. Much of the White House senior staff seems bound, not by loyalty to the president, but by a duty to protect the nation from the president. Trump, in turn, is reported to have said: “I hate everyone in the White House.”
    https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/republicans-its-time-to-panic/2017/10/12/5775d558-af76-11e7-be94-fabb0f1e9ffb_story.html?utm_term=.3529dbe7bb1e

    • Doug Langley

      Hard to believe that the most coveted job in the world was landed by someone who doesn’t even want it.

      • redarmyzombie

        Dumb fucker was too stupid to know what he signed up for.

        • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

          He thought he got to be CEO, or king…

      • OrG

        I’m not sure it’s the most coveted job. I can think of lots of jobs I’d rather have.

        • Doug Langley

          Well, just look how hard people fight to get it.

          • OrG

            I’ll just assume they’re more ambitious than me.

        • Elvis Causticfellow

          Reminds me of the old joke “After Obama, every black child in America can have the nightmare of being elected President of the United States.”

          • Three Finger Salute

            There was a similar statement about marriage equality. I think some comedian or something said it. “Congratulations gay people for winning the fight to affirm your right to be legally married in the eyes of American law. Now you get to be just as miserable as everybody else.”

          • Bad Tom

            It’s not really an OLD joke. President Obama only left office nine months ago.

        • Nasty Girl Brianna

          Swabbing out septic tanks with a toothbrush comes to mind.

        • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

          True. Best case scenario, half the country hates you…

      • ButtercuptheHarelessRabbit

        He didn’t want to actually BE president, he just wanted to win. Having to actually do the job is something he didn’t consider.

        • PubOption

          I’m not sure that he wanted to win. He certainly wanted the yooooouuuugest publicity stunt in history.

    • OutOfOrbit

      they could do something final if they really wanted to

      • CovfefeOfTheThoughtlessMind

        Uh, with votes?

        • Bad Tom

          The actual reason for votes to exist.

        • Riley Whodat Venable

          With Mental Status Exams.

      • Like a petition?

        Car boot sale?

      • bbayliss

        They’re the ONLY ones that can do something.

    • TundraGrifter

      Personally, I’m glad to read Mr. Trump is as miserable as he’s made so many other people.

  • Elvis Causticfellow

    I will never understand how abusers like Ailes, Trump, or Weinstein get any gratification from obtaining nonconsensual sex. These fellows, however, seem unburdened by such questions.

    • GreenGoldSharpie

      Because they nut, and for some, super damaged men that’s all that matters.

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        Also it’s about power.

        • CovfefeOfTheThoughtlessMind

          It’s all about power. Even these ugly moguls could find attractive women willing to be girlfriends or wives, and some do, but that’s not what floats their boat.

          • ButtercuptheHarelessRabbit

            Indeed. Weinstein’s wife is gorgeous.

    • SeekingCovfefeBarbie

      They get gratification from power, domination and humiliation.

      • Elvis Causticfellow

        Okay, let me rephrase: I “understand,” I guess, but not even a tiny part of me will ever empathize.

    • OutOfOrbit

      i guess it a power thing?

      • TundraGrifter

        Exactly! Rape isn’t about sex – it’s about power. It’s about a pitiful person making himself feel better by humiliating someone else.

      • CovfefeOfTheThoughtlessMind

        Don’t guess. That’s exactly what it is.

      • C4TWOMAN

        Sorta? Like Edith says, it’s fleeting, so I think there’s an addictive vector. The power just gives them more opportunities… with lack of consequences.

    • Edith Prickly

      There’s something obsessive about it. Whatever satisfaction they get is fleeting, because they have to do it over and over again. And they treat young women like a dessert cart – for instant gratification with no effort on their part. It’s revolting.

      • Riley Whodat Venable

        Chasing your first rush will kill you. You can only have your first rush once.

    • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

      Its a thing. Many years ago, I fled NJ and holed up in Thailand for a month, trying to get over things. One lunch, I saw a guy – clearly in his 50’s, overweight and bald – with his “GF” who probably wasn’t more than 21, and very attractive. He was trying to chat her up, and she was giving him one word answers between texting someone. I was creeped out for her, and was embarrassed for him. But there he was… I figured they had some form of arrangement going. I thought, and still think, that I’d never want to sleep with someone if she didn’t like me on some basic level.

  • OrG

    Is there overlap between incels and mgtows? Are they two completely different things?
    On second thought,I don’t care. Never mind.

    • JustDon’tSayConfabulation

      Well, they would overlap, but that would look gay.

    • Doug Langley

      I think it’s like Morlocks and Eloi. Or something.

    • I see no distinction.

      They are the one.

      • CovfefeOfTheThoughtlessMind

        Incels are a particularly whiny subgroup of MGTOWs.

        • Edith Prickly

          Yes, they call themselves “involuntary celibates” because apparently the ladies are obligated to provide them with sexual activity.

          • Well, I hope they can learn how to go fuck themselves, because that’s all the action they are ever likely to get.

    • ManchuCandidate

      Just acronyms for charmless angry virgin.

    • C4TWOMAN

      Yes.

    • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

      That would be a circle…

  • Blackest Noobs

    Larry might need to up his price here…i betcha those with a smoking gun already have 10 million….

    https://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2017/oct/14/larry-flynt-hustler-publisher-offers-10-million-di/

    • Shibusa

      Lol at this: “Sure I could use that $10 million to buy luxuries or further my businesses, but what good would that do me in a world devastated by the most powerful moron in history?”

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      Flynt is a kind of National Treasure. I mean, he is like the most powerful refuse collector, but you must respect talent.

      Game respects game.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

    Somehow, this is related:

    Michele Bachmann praises Trump as “Man of Faith”

    https://twitter.com/thehill/status/919309101456412672
    lolol

    • puredog

      He hath an ugly faith.

    • Nasty Girl Brianna

      A man of FILTH, more like.

    • Bad Scooter
    • Hey, Mammon faith is still faith.

    • ManchuCandidate
      • CovfefeOfTheThoughtlessMind

        Didn’t the Eagles sing about her?

        • Left Coast Tom

          Is that what happens when one drinks too much tequila?

          • Riley Whodat Venable

            Or not enough.

        • PubOption

          And The Adverts.

    • Canis Greyhame

      The evangelical right was horrible before Trump came along and grabbed them by the pussy. It’s just that now the hypocrisy is so obvious it’s almost laughable.

      • Edith Prickly

        They stopped pretending to be Christian a long time ago. Now it’s all about hating the right people, tribal identity and clinging to power.

        • Canis Greyhame
          • Edith Prickly

            Yes, they always skip Matthew 6:24 in their daily readings (“no man can serve God and money”)

        • grindstone

          I called it a tribe on another website, that actually had a comment section, and seemed to offend someone badly. But that’s it in a nutshell.

          • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

            Upfist for pissing off the religious right…

      • Riley Whodat Venable

        I think he will eventually cause the downfall of the Christian Domianianists.

    • TJ Barke

      Another round of my favorite game; Stupid or Lying?! Is the speaker actually so stupid and deluded that they believe the shit they’re saying, or are the being purposefully mendacious?

    • Elvis Causticfellow

      See, that’s a term of praise I find ludicrous even when applied to an actual person of faith.

      • OrG

        Seeing as “faith” is believing something there’s NO PROOF FOR.

        • Elvis Causticfellow

          Zackly. Why not just call them “credulous people”?

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      She’s a cunt.

    • SnowBomber

      The sight of his mouth has begun to really make my stomach cramp. I’ve never seen anyone else who shows both their upper and lower teeth every time they open their mouth. He has no eyelashes and the bags under them are so small, his eyes look like a pig’s.

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      I always remember her as the Michele with “One I, two crazy eyes.”

  • memzilla Ω
    • Shanzgood

      Wat?

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        Donald is a moron.

        • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

          He’s a great man of Faith. Michele Bachmann said so.

          • FukuiSanYesOta

            He’s got faith in his own stupid ass. It’s like having faith that the leopards won’t eat your face.

        • This is not newsworthy

        • JustDon’tSayConfabulation

          Franco is still dead.

          • Cousin Itt un Mondialiste

            Rush is still an oxy-moron.

          • redarmyzombie

            As is Breitbart!

          • CovfefeOfTheThoughtlessMind

            Show some respect! It’s “Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead.”

          • JustDon’tSayConfabulation

            I was in a hurry. The boss almost caught me…
            ..fuck it, I’m working on a Saturday

          • CovfefeOfTheThoughtlessMind

            Ugh. I know how that is.

        • Raan

          And Hitler still had a micropenis.

          Hey, something else they have in common!

        • Bad Tom

          Donald is a fucking moron.

      • Canis Greyhame

        He knows people blame insurance companies for screwing them over on premiums, so this is him pandering to his base with all the revenge he’s getting on their stock value. Of course, tanking the insurance companies when there’s nothing else keeping our healthcare system afloat is going to fuck everyone over, but meh, details.

    • Bad Scooter

      Dotty Don can’t figure numbers too good.

      • Marion in Savannah

        I guess he was told there wouldn’t be any math. That’s ALWAYS a lie, even around this place.

    • OrG

      ALL stocks went the roof when Obama was president.

      • Canis Greyhame

        Right? I expect we’ll see a similar tweet when Trump manages to tank the stock value for GM, crowing about how he really stuck it to them after doing so well with those Obummer bailouts.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Healthcare CEOs: “GOD DAMMIT! You bankrupted our companies and crashed the stock market in your obsessive, scorched-earth fit to get rid of everything that black guy did! Don’t you know a Mormon guy did it first? Why the hell did you do that?”

      Dotard Fatberg: “Because it’s 1929.”

      Justin Trudeau: “Hey, don’t look at me! I had nothing to do with this! I don’t even know why the hell he keeps inviting me here! We have universal healthcare! They have empty prayers, something called Infowars Vitamins, and some retired rugby guy named Preston Manning who sells awful pizza and satellite TV subscriptions, telling cancer patients to ‘rub some dirt on it’!”

      Other company CEOs: “Hey, that sounds pretty good. We don’t have to come up with a dime out of pocket for employee healthcare. Everyone pays for it, and it comes out cheaper in the long run! Let’s go talk to that guy about getting a better deal.”

      Dotard Fatberg: “See? What did I tell you. America First! America Only! We are Making America Great Again, on time and under budget! Uh… guys? Guys?”

      (every single company CEO follows Trudeau out the door — except healthcare CEOs, who start moving in to corner Trump… with shareholder votes)

      • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

        What Donnie Two Scoops seems to forget, is that other countries will have no reason to negotiate with the US, if all we do is say “OK, we get everything am done you get nothing, because America First!”

    • CripesAmighty

      Fact check. Until ACA, the insurance rackets regularly scraped 30-35% off the top of healthcare costs nationwide. Obamacare placed a cap of 20% (still an outrageous entirely superfluous expense, but much better.)

      • PubOption

        And some companies pulled out of markets where they couldn’t quite make 20%.

  • Bad Scooter

    Thank you Robyn! You rock.

    • FukuiSanYesOta

      I don’t know how she bears it, but I’m very glad she does.

  • JMP

    When are you assholes going to actually do what you’ve promised and fucking go your own way already, rather than inflicting yourselves on the rest of us non-cretinous normal people?

    • Raan

      Never.

      They’re never going to stop pissing and moaning like the impotent jerks they are.

    • C4TWOMAN

      Ikr? Christ, just GO!

      • Courser_Resistance

        There’s a clip of body cam video of a Sonoma cop yelling cars to “Go! Go! Go!” through a traffic light during the evacuation. We need that for the MGTOW

    • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

      Yup. Make like Fleetwood Mac, already!

  • ManchuCandidate

    A wise dwarf once asked: “Do you think dipping (their) wicks will cure what ails (them)?”
    A wise sell sword replied: “There’s no cure for being a c**t.”

    Sorry charmless Incels/MGtows/sad masturbators. It doesn’t matter how hard you try or how much money you have. Being a power abusing charmless shit isn’t going to help you get laid. Might be time to take a shower, go to the gym, get nicer clothes and go to charm school (not the KGB one.) That helps more than money or power.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Oh, didn’t you see the latest Man Page? Showering is deprecated because it’s incompatible with the manliness kernel! Well, not quite, but toilet paper is kind of cucky in the latest MGTOW version update. The anti-showering protocol is still in development, but you can preview it by downloading the… nightly release…

      • Marion in Savannah

        PUHLEEEZE — I’m about to start cooking dinner. Lordy…

      • Yeah not again TFS.

        • Three Finger Salute

          Sorry about that, Chief.

      • PubOption

        By their odor ye shall know them.

      • Ill-Advised

        I’ve heard of medicalizing personality issues, and even bad judgment. Socializing bad hygiene hasn’t been done since, what, the High Middle Ages?

    • This is all good advice, unfortunately there’s no substitute for a pleasant personality.

  • Vincent Ricola

    Basket full of disposables.

    • Jay Hansen

      You mean the House of Reprehensibles? Their Sphincter is named Ryan.

  • TundraGrifter

    These idiots would be much better off if they asked themselves “What is the point of being a human being?”

    • tomamitai

      To take care of cats, obviously!

      • Marion in Savannah

        Well, it’s actually to serve and obey cats, but you’re on the right track.

        • Canis Greyhame

          The Cats demand tribute! Kneel, supplicant!

          • That’s rich, coming from somebody with a wolf icon thingo.

          • Marion in Savannah

            You think dogs don’t serve, kneel, obey, and give tribute? Mine have terrified whippets in NYC when a friend of mine brought hers over to visit. Poor things cowered behind her on the couch!

          • Fair call. I always overlook subservience in my dog, she’s just so happy about nearly everything, whereas my cat always looks pissed about something.

  • FukuiSanYesOta

    Are they going to kick this kid out at the Astros game? That looks like fan interference to me.

  • motmelere

    “…like a hungry beast at a buffet…”, Where do these assholes eat?

    • FukuiSanYesOta

      Red Robin.

      • Shanzgood

        Golden Corral.

        • FukuiSanYesOta

          What’s that godawful seafood place? Red Lobster.

          Wait, why are all these shitty food destinations [color] [noun]?

          • Olive Garden

          • FukuiSanYesOta

            White Castle

          • Harold & Kumar have told me otherwise

          • Itty bitty burgers are amusing.

            So are stoners hunting them.

          • Jay Hansen

            Some stoners are a little harder to please.

          • They have had more practice.

            I practice hard myself.

          • Jay Hansen

            Me too. Someday I’ll get it right, but until then I must practice, practice, practice.

          • I hear it makes perfect 👌

            You will do fine.

          • Marion in Savannah

            [barf]

          • Elvis Causticfellow

            “Buy ’em by the sack, puke ’em by the roadside.”

          • tomamitai

            Every time I see “olive” used as a color, I always wonder “the green ones or the black ones?”

          • I just assumed that would be the colour of vomit produced after eating them

          • Jay Hansen

            DRAB ones.

          • Left Coast Tom

            Kalamata libelz!

          • tomamitai

            Never heard of them before. If they don’t sell them at Aldis or Walmart, it’s too fancy for my budget.

          • Rocket Pony Ron
          • Jay Hansen

            Appleby’s isn’t color-coded, but they are surpassing shitty.

          • FukuiSanYesOta

            It was originally called Puce Applebee’s, but focus groups hadn’t been invented at the time.

          • Jay Hansen

            Puke Applebee’s? That sounds vaguely appropriate.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            xD

          • Jay Hansen

            Most have been fuckus groups, in practice.

          • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

            And Ecru Bees just confused everyone…

          • Marion in Savannah

            Well, except for their fabulous salad bar — ask Bobo at the NYT.

          • Jay Hansen

            What?! Judith Miller is back?!

        • Actually, I rather like Golden Corral.

          • Shanzgood

            I’ve only ever been to the one here in my city and it just made me sad.

          • CripesAmighty

            Good pot roast.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            Same. Love the meatloaf, and I’m mad for their seafood salad.

  • For an interesting look at the phenomenon, the Least I Could Do has a perspective on this. (The link is to the start, then go forward.)

  • OutOfOrbit

    is season II of stranger things all different actors & stuff?

  • Angela Ruzzo

    Well gee, there I was at age 22 sitting at my desk, typing up the minutes from a meeting, wearing a beige wool 2-piece dress suit and a rust-colored silk blouse that had a high neckline with a big bow, and panty-hose and low heels (1978 office fashion) and my poor, sex-starved, ugly, 45-yr-old married boss was so overcome with my blatant sexual invitation that he came up behind me and bent over me and kissed the back of my neck and fondled my shoulders. I’d like to know exactly how that was my fault. He went on to become a State Senator. I found another job.

    • Marion in Savannah

      Been there, had that done to me. ICK! Sympathies, and good on you for quitting.

    • Musta been all that ankle you were showing off?

      I would upvote this comment twice if you said you kicked him in the balls and then quit.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        I thought about kicking him in the balls about 10 minutes later. I wasn’t expecting it, so was too surprised to react the way I would now.

    • ariel_gee_398

      You left the house without a male chaperone, duh.

  • Marion in Savannah

    Honest to gawd, I thought the last thread was the Garbage Men thread, just under a different name.

    Now… Completely and totally OT, but maybe a bit of relief from the MGTOW crowd. I’ve been binge watching “The Good Wife” while I’ve been spending hours in the kitchen (which I do to keep moderately sane) and lemme say… As A Old Straight (or is the proper term now heteronormative?) Broad I would jump into the sack with Archie Panjabi if she looked in my direction. Damn, girl, you got it going on!

    Now you can all go back to talking about disgusting men, as you see fit!

  • Bub, the cynical zombie

    “Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.”
    ― Albert Camus

    While some expend none whatsoever. Right, Uncle Dotard?

    • Marion in Savannah

      Iz you implying that Uncle Dotard is normal? I think I see the problem…

    • OrG

      I gave up expending tremendous energy trying to appear normal. Much happier just being a wierdo.

    • The Wanderer

      I consider it useful exercise. In under a year, though, the IDGAF will kick in.

    • Plaid Paisley

      It’s. so. hard.

  • Lance Thrustwell

    So I’m waiting in line with Junior Thrustwell for a big rock show. I don’t do big rock shows anymore, but I’m doing it for him, cuz they’re his heroes.

    • OrG

      Who is it?

      • Lance Thrustwell

        The Fighters Foo, I believe they’re called. Played the same damn basement as the bandleader back in ‘88. His music career turned out a little better than mine.

        • Marion in Savannah

          The Foo Fighters?

          • Lance Thrustwell

            Them’s the ones.

        • OrG

          Nice guys. I’m not a big fan, but Mrs. G loves them, so I’ve seen ’em a couple of times.

        • Courser_Resistance

          Ohhh, Dave Grohl is my Rock God! Enjoy!

          • Three Finger Salute

            Anybody notice he looks just like the drummer from Nirvana?

          • FukuiSanYesOta

            You know, I’d seen that.

          • Courser_Resistance

            Yes, the similarities are stunning, lol!

        • JustDon’tSayConfabulation

          I haz envy

        • redarmyzombie

          Make sure to bring some fresh pots!!!

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fhdCslFcKFU

  • Moved from the other thread, because it’s more appropriate here:

    Harvey Weinstein ousted from the Academy.

    Now, this might seem like a really, really good thing — and in a way, it is — however, it is important to note that the Academy isn’t doing this because they just found out about Weinstein’s actions. They are doing it because the public found out. This is a very common thing in Hollywood. When The Birth of a Nation finally became too toxic for the PR people (and it took a shockingly long time), the D.W. Griffiths Lifetime Achievement Award simply dropped the reference to the director, and in this way all problems with endemic racism in Hollywood was solved overnight.

    I’m not saying it’s bad that they kicked Weinstein out. I’m just saying that the Academy has a history of Making An Example of something and then standing around shrugging at an ongoing problem because “Well, we already did something! What more do you want us to do?” As the article points out, Bill Cosby, Roman Polanski and Mel Gibson are all still members in good standing. I would add Woody Allen, Bryan Singer, Brett Ratner, and a LOT of other names who have been accused and exonerated from this behavior in the past.

    To that end, the focus on Weinstein’s extremely combative Oscar campaign style is very telling. In fact, if Hollywood were actually angry with Wienstein about anything, it would be his ability to snatch Oscars from films like Saving Private Ryan, but there isn’t really a rule against nasty award campaigns. Truth to tell, there isn’t a rule against rampant sexism, or racist tirades, or all kinds of bad private and public behaviors that could land any other person in the unemployment line.

    What I’m saying, it that is isn’t time to turn off the pressure. As a first step, this is good. But it can’t stop here.

    • I am more concerned that they haven’t revoked Bob’s membership as well

    • Three Finger Salute

      Well, if Lance Armstrong can have his wins revoked, then take away Weinstein’s and the rest of these creeps and retroactively give the Oscar to the next-runner-up. While we’re at it, remove their plaques from the Walk of Fame.

      • Bad Tom

        That means there will be precedent for removing Trump’s.

        • Three Finger Salute

          Oh, he damn well needs to go. Along with Moses the gun humper and Rambo Raygun.

  • TundraGrifter

    How have health insurance stocks done lately? Flat-lined – this looks like a scan of President Trump’s brain activity.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/a1739769afb7677e0626c836021c9676b05b54d12ce9cfb8f33af825ad62c75b.png

    S&P 500 Health Insurance Stock Index

    https://us.spindices.com/indices/equity/sp-500-health-care-sector

    • Count Awesome

      Trump is a bomb, just like the remake of “Flatliners”.

      • Plaid Paisley

        I didn’t even like the first Flatliners, was kind of surprised they decided on a reboot.

        • Rocket Pony Ron

          Well, they’re running out of GOOD movies to remake, guess they’re down to the B catalogue now.

          • Plaid Paisley

            It’s weird, like there’s not a library full of cool stories that’d make for awesome film adaptations?

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            But then you need to pay somebody. Much better to just finagle some rights and keep it in the family, so to speak.

          • Plaid Paisley

            Yeah I don’t get it. I want to go see the new Bladerunner but aside from that I don’t even know what is in theatres right now. Come on Hollywood, do better!

  • ariel_gee_398

    If Saturday is gonna be a review of garbage men, can Sunday be a montage of animals who got adopted from shelters in the past week?

    • Marion in Savannah

      Oh, that is a MOST excellent idea! I look forward to DSFB, but to close out the week with happy animal stories would be wonderful.

    • OrG

      What part of nasty vile snark mob don’t you understand?
      Just kidding, great idea.

      • Plaid Paisley

        Don’t know about anyone else but current news got me in almost snark overload, need the sugary goodness of nicetimes to prevent snarkabetes. (Snarkabetes is pronounced in a Wilford Brimley voice)

        • I have some snarksulin if you need it.

          I made it in the bathtub 🛀 after I made the blackmarket rum.

          • Plaid Paisley

            Can I smoke it? I would like to smoke it.

          • Yes?

            Disclaimer: i am not responsible for any genetic modifications or mutations that will likely occur from any method of ingesting this experimental medicine.

            Peace out!

    • Canis Greyhame

      Maybe feature a few adopt-me! videos from various shelters.

    • JustDon’tSayConfabulation

      I promise, if we take on some fosters from the fires, I’ll post pics.

    • Plaid Paisley

      More baby panda falls! That one was amazing.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        I spent a good part of the afternoon watching two adolescent polar bear cubs frolicking in water both from up top and below the surface. They looked like they were having a hell of a good time (or should that be a whale of a good time?).

    • Jamoche
    • TippingHeadon

      California passed a law banning pet stores from selling dogs, cats and rabbits from “puppy mills”!

      • This is good news, Australia’s working on similar legislation due to too many crazy dogs trying to eat people’s faces.

        • Rocket Pony Ron

          I’m sure the dogs are just emulating the local wildlife.

          • I suppose everything must eat something’s face, and to be fair the wildlife was here first.

            We tasty humans are just like dessert in the timescale thing.

            Good thing face transplants are possible nowadays, will be a big business in Australia.

        • PubOption

          In Australia the local dogs take, and eat, babies.

    • Yes! Great idea.

      Animals are the best people.

    • calliecallie
    • Ω cynmac’s reclaiming her time

      It’s my doge’s fifth adoption day anniversary. She’s wearing her birthday shirt!

  • Reximus
    • The Wanderer

      Irony Points have just gone up.

    • wait! what?

      The food bar is pretty good.

      They put Doc Hollaindaise sauce on their fries…

      • Plaid Paisley

        Groan. But also so awesome. Well done!

    • redarmyzombie

      …Huh…

    • Well that’s just weird.

    • Rocket Pony Ron

      We kept tellin’ the Phoenix Kid he warn’t that fast, but he never believed us, and now he’s a-gettin’ sewed up by th’ local sawbones. Gonna have a powerful thirst when he wakes up, I bet.

  • TJ Barke

    My weekly dose of “Well, at least I’m not as shit as those guys”.

    • Canis Greyhame

      Lessons in What Not To Become
      https://youtu.be/fVvPhYtd0U8

    • Count Awesome

      Its my weekly dose of “I get to sleep with an articulate and beautiful woman and they don’t.”.

      • TJ Barke

        Hey, don’t rub it in.

        • FukuiSanYesOta

          He just sleeps in the cinema.

          • Count Awesome

            I’m not rich enough for that. Movies are fucking expensive.

          • Being an old, I remember when if you were trying to be cheap on a date, you took them to movie. If you wanted to spend money, you took them to a restaurant. These days, you have to reverse that.

          • Count Awesome

            I’d rather spend a shit load of money on a decent dinner than spend admission for a shitty movie at this point. Lucky for me the Countess agrees

          • SeekingCovfefeBarbie

            We have a couple of second-run theatres but you have to take a cushion coz the seats are terrible.

        • Count Awesome

          Sorry, I didn’t mean you in anyway.

        • wait! what?

          Rub it in, rub it out; whatever it takes…

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        My weekly dose of “Mrs. Toomush is awesome. How did I manage to get next to her in the first place, 27 years ago?…”

        • Count Awesome

          I know, right! I’m so lucky!

          • FukuiSanYesOta

            Toomush is going to lamp you one for sleeping with his wife, you know.

          • Toomush_Inferesistance

            No cuck! No cuck! You’re the cuck!….

    • grindstone

      My dose of “go hug world’s best spouse”. Side note: he’s not what these guys would call an alpha, at first glance. But I adore him, and find him smart, funny, engaging, charming, and sexy. These guys are just whiny assholes.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Baby steps, TJ. You’ll get what you want. I wish you could see what I see.

      • TJ Barke

        I honestly don’t think so, but thanks.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Sweetheart, when I turned 40 I figured my only choice left was to get really good at painting miniatures so I might be remembered.

          Things are different now at 44. :) Keep taking those Baby Steps.

          • I’ve seen your work.

            Miniature Madskillz.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Thanx. :)

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            Hang on, 44? Really?

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Yes. :)

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            I was WAY off.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            How old did you think? You wont offend me.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            Early-mid Thirties, mostly based on neck structure and stories you’ve told about yourself.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            :) I think I look mid-30s myself. I’ve had women not believe me when I tell them I’m mid 40s.

            Mom always looked younger than her years too.

    • TJ, you seem like an ok person to me, and I’m pretty good at reading people.

      It’s an empathy thing, you seem to have that as well.

      Maybe lacking a bit of confidence, but like Anna said, small steps still get you where you want to go.

      • TJ Barke

        Can’t get there, so fuck it.

  • Courser_Resistance

    I was just in the bathroom getting ready to drive tonight and with the radio going in the living room, it reminded me of my college years, getting ready to go out clubbing. Christ, life has changed.

    • Dept. of Space Tacos

      speaking of which, I found some great stuff to help keep one regular.


      Yeah, I see your point.

    • Memories of times gone by are good for nostalgia and learning, but life is change, look forward.

    • Rocket Pony Ron

      It has a way of doing that, no matter how hard you yell at it.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    You can practically hear the fapping in their musings.

    • Count Awesome

      They should offer “fap-dancing” lessons.

    • FukuiSanYesOta

      Their muse is Jergens.

      • Dollar store, knock off Jergens

        • FukuiSanYesOta

          “Juergens! Ist Wunderbar!”

          • Anna Elizabeth

            “Nien Blisterin das Knockwurst!”

          • FukuiSanYesOta

            Witze machen! es ist spargel!

          • Anna Elizabeth

            xD

            ETA – OMG, I ran that thru Google Translate and now I’m laughing so hard I’m in tears.

      • Count Awesome

        Their Muse is Jerk-ins.
        FTFY

  • Count Awesome

    “Men Going Their Own Way” sounds like Trump’s plan to “Make America Great Again”.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Fun fact: MAGA is the Merkinese spelling of ISIS.

      • Count Awesome

        Is that derived from President Muffley Merkin?

        • Three Finger Salute

          No idea. Although I believe the correct demonym now is Orangustani, for Untied States of Orangustan.

          • amrak63

            Orangutan libelz!

          • Three Finger Salute

            Yeah, but these are unevolved orangutans. A cheap Ivanka knockoff brand.

  • wait! what?

    I’m still trying to figure out how a Fleetwood Mac song turned into a “movement.”

    https://youtu.be/6ul-cZyuYq4

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      They may have reinterpreted it to having something to do with the bowels…

    • Count Awesome

      I guess “break-up” songs can do that.

    • Canis Greyhame
    • Dept. of Space Tacos

      every seen her on American Horror Story as the White Witch. Kinda awesome.

      • wait! what?

        Yeah, I can’t believe that’s almost 4 years ago. I will not age that gracefully.

  • Left Coast Tom

    The fires continue in the North Bay, and just now I see the death toll has risen to 38. Still hundreds missing.

    The winds have shifted to northeasterly, which is blowing the smoke out over Marin County thence over the ocean. Sucks for Marin, but for the first time in a week I can see the mountains on the other side of SF Bay, and opening my windows yields fresh air.

    Apparently the North Bay hills have several more hours of forecasted high winds, though the CalFire interview I saw indicated the winds had died down considerably.

    By Tuesday the winds are forecasted to turn strongly onshore, blowing all the smoke into the Central Valley (sorry about that…) and bringing moister air to hopefully bring down the fires. Rain showers are forecasted starting Wednesday evening, which would be awesome if it materializes.

    • Stay safe America, those fires look terrible!

      I’d send you some rain if I could.

    • tomamitai

      I was amazed by some of the before and after shots of the burned areas, they looked like suburbs without a lot of trees and brush. I expected them to be more densely forested.

      • Left Coast Tom

        The impacted rural areas, apart from vineyard, are grassland and live oak. But the fires cut deep into the city of Santa Rosa, burning lots of homes.

    • JustDon’tSayConfabulation

      IKR? it’s almost clear out here. Last night was terrible in Oakland; I can’t even imagine what it’s like up in the valleys.

    • Count Awesome

      Having lived in Santa Rosa it just makes me sad.

  • I have started watching Mind Hunters on Netflix…interesting so far. It’s about the inital interviews the FBI did with serial killers

    • Dept. of Space Tacos

      ooh, thanks for the rec.

      Seen Murder Maps yet? It’s what I’m watching. Victorian era crime – YES PLEASE!

      • Nope. But i have read some articles about outbreak mapping and how it got started, really interesting and scary shit

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          it’s actually less murder mapping than I hoped (I actually am into GIS).

          Mostly just a historical crime show of London.

          • I will keep it in mind. I’m back on nights the week of halloween, so it’ll be off-cycle TV for me

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            bastards…

        • TJ Barke

          That John Snow knew his shit.

      • wait! what?

        Save viewing room for the “Alienist.”

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Alienist_(TV_series)

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          ooooh, perfect. On netflix or hulu?

          • wait! what?

            Whomever carries TNT.

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            sorry, I was just reading that on the linky. Hopefully it’ll come to Netflix, they carry Walking Dead after all.

    • Three Finger Salute

      So basically, “The Real Criminal Minds”?

    • tomamitai

      I only watched about the first half of episode one, and it seemed pretty boring. Does it get better after that?

    • cheetojeebus

      Me too, started last night. Good show. A recommended book- the Murder Room. It’s about the Vidocq Society. Quite interesting.

      • Three Finger Salute

        I just looked that up and that really does sound pretty cool.

        • cheetojeebus

          Yeah, it isn’t the most well written book surprisingly but it is very smart and insightful.
          In the early days back in the early 90s they came to me to get my take on a piece of evidence in a case. I couldn’t help them much but it was cool to meet them.

      • Dept. of Space Tacos

        vidocq!

        Goddamn it i was trying to remember this a week or two ago…ye gods. Thank you!

  • gallbladder
    • PEE TAPES! PEE TAPES!!

      • gallbladder

        Or tax returns. I’ll take either.

      • Ω cynmac’s reclaiming her time

        Penthouse also offered $1M for the tape(s).

        • mailman27

          Gotta question their motives.

        • Three Finger Salute

          “Dear Penthouse: I never thought this would happen to America…”

    • TJ Barke

      Classy as fuck, Mr. Flynt.

    • Count Awesome

      Larry Flynt is strangely enough a very strong advocate of free speech. Just ask Jerry Falwell.

    • tomamitai

      How do they decide which particular piece of info deserves the credit?

      • Count Awesome

        I propose AOT, K.

      • stumpknocker

        probably going to do with something about breest.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      donald’s gonna get right on that….

      • gallbladder

        The Twitter meltdown is gonna be fucking EPIC.

    • DainBramage
    • calliecallie

      I’ve been wondering if Larry Flynt just gave the whole $10 million to Paul Ryan, would he maybe then start impeachment proceedings?

  • Nounverb911

    Needs more dick jokes….
    The British think that Ambassador Woody Johnson’s name is a hoot.

    https://twitter.com/DearAuntCrabby/status/919313716788809728

    • Count Awesome

      I hope the embassy doesn’t have shag carpets.
      ETA: the Brits do love a good dick joke, just ask Willy Shake-Spear.

      • amrak63

        Oh, behave, all of you lot!

      • Three Finger Salute

        He wore tights and a shame collar. Many, many people don’t know that.

      • Like spotted dick?

        Es food apparently.

        • Count Awesome

          I’m a ginger and an ex-girlfriend gave me a can of “Spotted Dick” as joke.

          • You gotta laugh.

          • Count Awesome

            I laughed my ass off.

          • Three Finger Salute

            At least it wasn’t canned clams.

          • Count Awesome

            That’s the gift you give a girlfriend when you want to break up with her.

          • Monsters!

            I wash my hands of this madness.

    • Three Finger Salute

      What more could you expect from a country that gave the world spotted dick, the word “Fuck,” and a town called Scunthorpe? Oh, those bawdy Brits…

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        Some awesome village names also too.

        I’ve been to Shitterton and Scratchy Bottom, but never Wetwang.

        Also, Gropecunt Lane in London, but it’s not called that any more.

        • Ah. So you’ve never looked at a map of Newfoundland?

        • Raan

          And Penistone.

        • Count Awesome

          Wetwang and Bangkok should be “lover cities” cuz “sister cities” would just be weird.

          • Three Finger Salute

            Intercourse, Pennsylvania.

            It’s 6:00, do you know where your Penn is?

          • Count Awesome

            Somewhere in my Countess, hopefully.

          • Celtic_Gnome

            French Lick, Indiana.

          • redarmyzombie

            Guess it depends on whether folks have a twin fetish or not…

        • Raan

          Petition: Change “Pennsylvania Avenue” to “Gropecunt Lane” until the end of the Trump administration.

          • FukuiSanYesOta

            This seems extremely apt.

          • Count Awesome

            Will deliveries for “Gropecunt Lane” only be accepted on “Finger Bang Alley”?

          • Raan

            No, regular deliveries can use the main road.

            Chocolate deliveries have to go around back, though.

          • amrak63

            CONGRATULATIONS! YOU WINN 10,000 INTERNETZ FOR THAT SUJESSTION!!!1!

            PLEASE TO BEE FOLLOWING INSTRUXIONZ OF HONORABLE IMOUTO-CHAN TSUKASA TO OBTANE DELIVERRY OF THE 10,000 INTERNETS TOO YUUR ACKOUNTT.

            https://i.imgur.com/0NQ5NYV.gif

      • Raan

        True, but we’re the ones who put a town called Intercourse in the middle of a puritanical religious sect.

  • memzilla Ω

    Guys, let me tell you how I figured out to get laid: be funny. In junior high, I knew I wasn’t gonna be getting by on my sports ability, or money, or handsomeness, or car, or neighborhood. I decided to be the Class Clown. Not the evil hurtful punching down kind that these culvert-dwelling vermin use, the clean kind.

    Example: Scene: sixth grade art class. Mostly cool but prone-to-snap 35-ish woman teacher:

    Class: (low grade mumbling)
    Teacher: What’s all this HUMMING IN HERE??!!
    Me: HUUUUUMMMMmmmmmmmmmmm…
    Class (in unison, on key): HUUUMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmm…
    Teacher: (cracks up)
    Class: (cracks up)

    I also, later, perfected a tubercular-sounding bark of a cough which just happened to hit the resonant frequency of this one tiled classroom, which amplified it about 4x louder and could be used — sparingly — as an Animal House-like “BLOWJOB” interjection. And there was not a thing the teacher could say about it.

    So with this and other experiences, I noticed that smiling girls looked at me, and were smiling. I sensed opportunity. Long story short, I combined intelligence, empathy, and self-deprecation with humor.

    Example: Scene: woman doctor’s office:
    Doctor: Where were you shot?
    Me: Philadelphia.
    Doctor: (almost falls out of chair)

    Example: let’s say I drop something in the supermarket. I might say something like “Excuse me, I’m gonna turn off my “Act Like An Idiot” button now — this aisle should be safe again in just a moment.”

    See guys, you MGTOW cattle you, if you laugh at yourself, it shows a woman that you’re strong enough and comfortable enough to make fun of yourself. Which shows you’re strong.

    But you’ll never get it. Know why? Because you have no empathy. There’s a reason there has never been a successful conservative comedy show. Because your humor is all about punching down. Ours is about punching up. Or at least, sideways.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Humor does go a long way, and a Guy that can laugh at himself is comfortable in his own skin, and that is a very sexy trait.

    • Dept. of Space Tacos

      i’m funny ( at least I think), it still hasn’t worked – but I’m the picky sort (and totally blind to when a woman actually likes me).

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        “and totally blind to when a woman actually likes me”

        I hear ya.

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          seriously, I used to confuse friend and interested party – so i just assumed a woman was being polite or friendly adn not…amorous.

          Since then they have to damn near kick me in the shins and say “fuck me!”…

          • Bill Diaz

            That is the best way to have things, really and to be honest, the choice almost always belongs to women anyhow. If it means you have to wait, it also means you arent pressuring them or yourself.

            Have a great day!

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            true Bill! I have TONS of female friends i talk to – I don’t talk to a single ex.

            Hope you’re well, always good to see you.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        See, this is why I’d love to take a bunch of Y’alls out with me, club, bar, coffee shop, bookshops, and point out when a Hottie is giving you the eye, things like that.

        I am certain Y’all just need practice at non-verbal cues and such.

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          heh, I could use the advice. But I’ pretty sure I never get “the eye”, except PERHAPS when I’m dressed up for work.
          Most women look right through, like I’m not even there.
          It’s upsetting sometimes, but mostly I like being invisible.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            It’s chemistry and also place-and-time, Sweetie. Sometimes a girl is just busy and not looking at any guys.

            If you start to believe you have something to offer, the girls will too. )

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            there’s a punk rock song with a line that says “where’s the gift in the way you present yourself.”

            Tha’ts mostly my problem.

            ; D

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I was the biggest, loneliest loser on the planet until I started to believe in myself. :)

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            : D
            As you should!
            I’d rather have 50 female friends than be “one of those guys.”

          • Anna Elizabeth

            :) But you should believe in yourself too, Space. It’s awesome to have friends of any gender, but if you want romance you should get that too.

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            there’s a cute bartender I think lkes me, but you never know with bartenders, ya know?

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Yeah, they are good with people, that’s part of their skillset. :) I wish I could see the scene when you’re at the bar.

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            i’ve got pictures, but I’d need you give me an email address in response to an old post of mine.

            Anyway, yeah, i dated a bartender for awhile. She said, “it’s just work” and I was surprisingly cool with it.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Sure, I didn’t see this earlier, sorry.

            ae808@amail.club

            that’s a throwaway, I’ll answer from my real eMail

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            got it – you can delete.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Got it, replied! :)

        • Three Finger Salute

          Anna’s gonna be the Wonkers’ version of Will Smith in “Hitch” :)

          • Anna Elizabeth

            xD

        • FukuiSanYesOta

          Here’s how completely fucking clueless I am.

          There’s one night I’m having a couple of drinks in a bar and I’ve just finished a monumental project. I’m on my own. The bartenderess says “Have you finished it now?” and I say yes. Apparently my workmates had been in there discussing how hard I was working (did 14-18 hour days for a month and a half) and how impressive it was.

          Anyway, the lady next to me asked what I’d done, and I explained that it was geeky and boring, but she pushed. So I told her. Long story short, we got some drinks in, discussed language (she was of Finnish descent), had lots of laughs, went out for sushi, then more drinks. I just thought she was fascinating, a very smart person. Eventually she asked “are you going to get us a hotel room?”

          I was gobsmacked. I was just having fun with an interesting person.

          Utterly clueless.

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            heh, I’ve had similar ones. (The most obvious was the girl winking at me from 3 feet away).

            But yeah, been there. I’m ALWAYS clueless.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            It’s a skill Hun, and it’s a skill you can improve at.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Wow. Yeah, she was into you, Darlin’. I can see why, you’re a great guy.

            Y’alls need Anna to be your Wingmate for an evening or two.

          • FukuiSanYesOta

            “are you going to get us a hotel room?” is pretty unambiguous lol

            An Anna wingmate would work wonders!

            For the record, I said no.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            :)

          • SeekingCovfefeBarbie

            That is attractive in and of itself. It’s liberating to just be having a good time without thinking the person you’re with has a hidden agenda and is trying to work an angle.

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            i just remembered a funny one – I was at a party with some friends. met this woman, we dance all sexy like. She had thigh high stockings (hot!). She asks me to drive her home. I dutifully do so, she asks me in, I decline, she says, “are you kidding?”

            Yeah, that was a fuck up.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            Consider that that cluelessness was part of the attraction: you were treating her as a person and as a friend and NOT trying to chat her up. You let her decide with no pressure. That’s one hell of a compliment, if you ask me.

        • redarmyzombie

          My best friend and I have this somewhat awkward situation where he, despite being on this weird spectrum between heterosexual and asexual, keeps attracting men, and I, a homosexual man, consistently attract women…

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            i made a lesbian friend sometime back (my joke was the only girl I met all night was gay).

            we would hang out – she managed to get a woman I thought was cute at a bar to come over and talk to us. At the end of hte convo, this (apparently straight) girl wanted my friend’s number, not mine.

            Oh well, at least someone is getting laid.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            I’ve seen that sort of thing so often that I have to think there’s some specific switch that’s being thrown in people’s heads, though I can’t imagine where it might be.

      • memzilla Ω

        Self-deprecate and empathize with a woman. Put yourself in her shoes and figure out what she’s feeling in the situation you’re both in. Let’s say it’s hot. Try something like, “I don’t know about you, but I think my sweat is about to turn into actual gasoline. If I actually erupt in flames, I promise I’ll move out of range.” Get a bad mark on the test. Be in earshot and say, like Oliver Hardy: “Well, this is ANOTHER fine mess I’ve gotten myself into.”

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          lol – I do self-deprecation VERY well.

          I’m just funny looking I guess. Hell, I’m surprised I’ve EVER had sex.

      • Bill Diaz

        Most women arent that shy when they like a guy, often times they will ask you out or run you to ground, lol. Both of the women that I was married to were ones that I tried desperately to fight off (unsuccessfully). Im not sure of the context, but the best environment I have found is repeated, low pressure exposure (usually in an educational environment) where women get the chance to know you over time and to appreciate your more subtle or occult qualities.

        Take courses at the library, or go to community college for something you enjoy like art or history. Even doing volunteer work is a great way to be around like minded people and giving them a chance to see what a great guy you are. As a frequent pest on this sight, I have to say that you are a pleasant and positive person. But on the flip side, my current best friend is a really nice, really good looking Russian MD/PhD who has some anxiety issues and no idea how to speak with women.

        The best way to speak to women (IMO) is to forget they are women and treat them like people, that also helps with the anxiety piece too. If you let people see what you are in their own time, the ones that value those things will make it a point to be in your company with a greater frequency.

        There isnt any magic about it, everyone likes people who are nice and pleasant to them and 9 times out of 10, that is all it takes to find a person that ‘fits’. It requires a bit of patience and self confidence to ‘let yourself hang out’ like that, but based on my limited interactions with you on these boards, you are the kind of ‘hidden gem’ that women value and seek out for a real partner in life.

        Competent capable women dont like being perved or slimed on and that isnt your style. Consider it a form of ‘psychic gardening’, if you want the cute fuzzy forest creatures to make friends with you, make a comfortable, safe, pleasant environment of flowers, peace and joy to share with others and they will find you.

        I really mean that and tell you after a long life of interaction with the distaff half, that as long as you arent cloistered and they know who you are and where to find you, it is only a matter of time before your opposite number finds you (or you find each other).

        Look at it from the other side, smnart funny women are usually sick of being discounted and viewed as a piece of meat. If you think it is hard for you, imagine how hard it is for women to find a decent man. They are just as tired of being lonely as you are and even more concerned about creeps and rapists.

        True love begins where all true friendships do, with admiration, respect and comfort. If you are who you are, there is someone willing to value those things if you are willing to share.

        Have a great day!

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          I do go to community college!

        • Rocket Pony Ron

          That was… that was a joy to read, man. Seriously.

        • Hillpiper

          sweet, Bill

    • Ω cynmac’s reclaiming her time

      I like geeky men who are passionate about their work, usually technology. Because I am the same way. When I first started having my problems, I invited my mom, BF, brother, cousin and kid to participate in my therapy, but only if we had a group session with my therapist first. Only my mom and BF took me up on it. Only my mom needed more than one session.
      My therapist asked my BF “what do you like the most about cynmac?” and he answered “that she understands what I do at work and we can talk through my problems. I’ve never had that before”. He has said other sweet things. He gets me.
      Maybe if MGTOWs took the time to see women as people too, and not just pussies, they could find someone that they could be intimate with, in a real way.
      Oh, who am I kidding? These guys are hopeless.

    • bluicebank

      Actually, the first rule of getting laid is to pretend you’re not desperate.

      Sort of like the late Douglas Adams’ advise on how to fly:

      “The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.”

    • SeekingCovfefeBarbie

      If you read the shit the so-called incels write, they have developed a mutual, hateful caricature of women and view them as objects to be used, not as fellow human beings. They don’t long for love, they long for someone to degrade, and feel offended that they might be expected to “settle” for a woman who isn’t virginal and beautiful. They don’t want to become attractive mate-prospects, they just want to wallow in their fantasy of thwarted entitlement.

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      Conservative types also are incapable of the self-deprecating humor, due I suppose to the tiny, fragile egos.

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      My experiences are similar. Women like intelligent men who make them laugh. As co-workers, friends, partners, or wives. It helps to be more witty than gross.
      The jokes that make your bros laugh aren’t the ones you need in a room full of women.

    • King Beauregard

      Humor and confidence are often tied together too. Punching down and confidence are not.

  • bluicebank

    Probably already posted below, but if not:

    “You’ll never work in this town again.”

    Harvey kicked outta the club for getting caught.

    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/10/14/business/media/harvey-weinstein-ousted-from-motion-picture-academy.html

    • Anna Elizabeth

      But what does Hillz think about Roman Polanski still being a Member, and will Chris Cillizza cease fisting his own peehole for long enough to raise this important question?

      But seriously, the shitstorms haver only just begun in Hollywood, I reckon.

      • bluicebank

        Maybe because there’s a rule that the 1970s don’t count for film makers and rock stars? Who knows why Polanski’s still on the lam?

        • Anna Elizabeth

          That’s a good question.

      • An Outhouse for the résistance

        And what about Woody Allen

  • Toomush_Inferesistance

    Huffpost did a depressing thing to my phone this afternoon – they had an article about the Madness of the Moron, warning about his judicial appointments (fast) and the way he’s tearing up Obama executive orders….fuck…

    • Three Finger Salute

      Yeah, I gotta stop reading about this crumbling shit. Trump Making America Germany Again is bad enough. Then there’s the Catalonia clusterfuck, the Nazis in the Bundestag, the French wanting Macron in the guillotine, the idiotic polling numbers in Canada — who the fuck ranks Feminist Jedi Dad as kinda-sorta maybe not as bad as Sasquatchestan Uterus Enslaver and expresses horror about New York Uterus Enslaver?

  • Duke

    I’m a man and I’m going my own way.
    To the kitchen.
    And I’m going to be manly there.
    I’m broiling scallops.
    My way.
    And I may fry some, too.
    That’s the manly way.
    Broiled and fried.
    Yeah.
    Manly.

    • Scallops, the breath mint for real men!

    • bluicebank

      Got a great scallop recipe … but dang if the prices on scallops dint shoot through the roof in the last year.

    • Rocket Pony Ron

      I adore scallops. I spent a couple of summers at CFB Borden, and for some reason there were all the scallops you could eat every Friday at the mess. I never found out why, though I suspect they’d been dredging out a harbour somewhere and we were eating what they dragged up.

  • Toomush_Inferesistance

    I think I’m getting too old to be setting trusses….maybe tomorrow will go better…

    • Hydraulics are your friend in these types of situations!

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        And my Inversion Table…

  • Sophia

    Really? Sometimes I’m not sure if stuff is true. Wonder why that is

    New Rule: Residents In Nine States Will Need Passports For Domestic Flights in 2018

    Kentucky
    Maine
    Minnesota
    Missouri
    Montana
    Oklahoma
    Pennsylvania
    South Carolina
    Washington

    https://www.forbes.com/sites/lealane/2017/09/30/new-rule-residents-in-nine-states-will-need-passports-for-domestic-flights-in-2018/#349c41446e59

    https://www.tsa.gov/sites/default/files/resources/realid_factsheet.pdf

    • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

      “Your papers are not in order! Guards!”

    • GreenGoldSharpie

      Haha, Missouri sucks.

      — Illinois resident.

      • Christopher Story

        Where is Illinois?
        – Missouri Resident

        • Three Finger Salute

          “What is Aleppo?”

          -One particular New Mexico resident

          • Bill Diaz

            Silly rabbit, Aleppo was one of the Marx Brothers!

            Have a great day!

    • Three Finger Salute

      The fuck? Who the fuck does this? The U.S. is supposed to be one gigantic Schengen Area! What’s he going to do, build walls around every state and make Hawaii pay for it? Because Obama?

      • Jennifer R

        Well you see, racist well off white people want security theater. So poor people have to just suck it up and be happy we aren’t dead yet. They could probably find a reason to put you in jail for expressing dissatisfaction anyway.

        • Three Finger Salute

          And so it begins.

          How soon before they start sewing maple leaf patches on everyone’s overcoat to identify us godless liberals?

          • Jennifer R

            Yeah, plus who the fuck has 200 dollars for a passport in this economy?

      • Sophia

        This wasn’t trump. Law passed in 2005 but is supposed to go into full effect in January. Probably gave them time to update driver licenses and these state didn’t?

        • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

          Exactly. It is on the states. They’ve had since ’05 to meet the criteria. Whether or not reasonable people think this is a good law or a bad law, these states have apparently just ignored it.

          And really, Washington State, da fuq?

          • Lefty Wright

            Apparently, a few of the state’s are going “you ain’t the boss of me” to the feds and intentionally refusing to update their systems to the secure id requirements.

          • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

            Of course, they are, besides, it’s just the rubes who get screwed here and ain’t that the only thing citizens are good for?

        • Three Finger Salute

          So, it was Bush.

          Thanks, Republicans.

    • Count Awesome

      Washington seems out of place there.

      • Three Finger Salute

        That’s just so he could say it’s not a Muslim ban or, or something.

    • cheetojeebus

      They refused to update drivers licenses. It sucks. I need to renew my passport now.

      • Sophia

        The time frame looks to be about the same as when Ontario, Canada started to offer an Enhanced Drivers License that can be used to cross the border by land only. You go through a process kind of like getting a Passport.

        • Three Finger Salute

          At least (on a different but related issue) Ontario has gender-neutral driver’s licenses and doesn’t pitch a fit about trans people updating their information. In the USA it’s considered identity fraud. I don’t even want to think about what kind of complications will arise from the passport. USA is morans.

          • Sophia

            Oh fuck. Never even thought of that.

          • Three Finger Salute

            And for the cons up there to hem and haw that this is Liberal “virtue-signaling” reveals the base lack of humanity they all have.

          • Lambsendbeds

            What exactly does “virtue signaling” mean? I heard it used on the “Lovett or Leave It” podcast, and I’m not familiar with it.

          • Raan

            Preaching to the choir, buddy.

          • Plaid Paisley

            Identity fraud? Jeez that’s so fucked up.

      • SeekingCovfefeBarbie

        New Mexico delayed for a long time because they didn’t want to deny licenses to undocumented drivers–we have high auto insurance rates and want as many people as possible to be insured. They finally settled on a two-tier license system. I have a passport so I’m not going to bother with the trouble and expense to get another license. The one I have is good for 7 more years.

    • TJ Barke

      WTF?

    • Raan

      Glory to Arstotzka.

    • Serai 1

      That makes no sense.

    • Hemp Dogbane

      Minnesota just got an extension, again. The legislature has been fucking around on this for 10 years. Shockingly, it has been held up by Republicans for reasons that make complete sense to them. This time around there was a deal but Gov. Dayton played hardball on the issue of drivers licenses for noncitizens, not a bad thing, but major brinksmanship. Minnpost has published several good articles about this over the past decade.

  • mailman27

    I got a laff before, so here goes: MGTOW=Men Grasping Their Own Weiners

    • Dept. of Space Tacos

      add it to the Wonkette lexicon!
      DOMINIC!

      • He’s really been slacking off on the style guide

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          I know right?
          (Although as a fellow intern, I get it. I’ve got shit pending…)

    • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

      APPROVED!

      • Dept. of Space Tacos

        teh gentlemen drunk from texas makes a motion…any seconds?

        • JustDon’tSayConfabulation

          seconds? I’ll even give -hic- minutes!!

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            ANOTHER ROUND!

          • JustDon’tSayConfabulation

            No, I couldn’t, really, …well shit, I guess it would be wrong to pour it out now, wouldn’t it? Cheers!

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            salud!
            (or an irish toast translated badly into spanish)
            a mis amigos faltan.

    • bluicebank

      If they’re grasping, they’re doing it wrong. (I’ll show myself out.)

  • JustDon’tSayConfabulation

    So. I filed my first invention disclosure at work this week. It may come to nothing, or it may turn into a patent. We’ll see.

    • Rocket Pony Ron

      Hooves crossed!

  • Panika MCD

    maybe if these guys think fellatio is the way up, they should try it on their male superiors.

    • Bill Diaz

      Or go to yoga class so they can ‘Bannon’ themselves!

      Have a great day!

      • Panika MCD

        no offense, but the “Have a great day!” on all your comments–and I know you’re being sincere, so don’t take this the wrong way–is going to remind us of this troll we used to have and Chris Cillizza. try adding a gif instead! (especially of cute animals, we love those.)

        • Count Awesome

          He and the “Have a great day!” have been here off and on for a long time though.

          • Panika MCD

            I never noticed…though I do recognize the name.

          • Lefty Wright

            It’s OK for a response on a positive article or encouraging comment, but it can be a little off putting sometimes. For example if he comments on Trump dismantling the ACA and ending with have a nice day. Sometimes, it’s just not called for.

        • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

          Sometimes, I find the “Have a great day!” to be so incongruous that I LOL! and it makes my day. I need to come up with a sig like that.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    “nofilmynofucky” (There’s a whole fun MRA thing where they say they will only have sex with women if it’s being filmed, so she can’t accuse them of rape later)

    You’ve got a deal, asshole!

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/dc6f3d5f4a7b9515b6142415d04f858ca2b395a5e79dc095e1939b51de7a75e9.gif

    • bubbuhh

      This threat to have sex with a ackshul women would be scary if a ackshul women would go anywhere near them.

    • Count Awesome

      Women should agree to the filming on the condition that there is “pegging” involved.

    • bluicebank

      That rule only applies to picking up at the dry cleaners … “no ticky, no laundry” I believe is the non-PC phrase

    • Serai 1
      • Resistance Fighter Callyson

        Hi there–let me know if you need a ride to the Wonkette get-together later this month. I fixed my schedule so that I am free to attend and would be glad to have some company!

        • Serai 1

          I would love to hitch a ride with you, girl!

          • Resistance Fighter Callyson

            Cool–email me and we can coordinate. Maybe over coffee?

          • Serai 1

            Totally! Maybe next weekend, once we know the dates?

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    They made their choice

    I’ve heard of not understanding the concept, but Jesus fucking Christ…

  • canes_pugnaces
  • Gayer Than Thou

    Somebody really needs to take all these 12 year olds aside and tell them that their interest in sex is normal and natural and help them develop healthy attitudes about (and expectations of) sexual activity. And maybe encourage them to wait until they have the maturity to appreciate what they’re doing.

    • bubbuhh

      Also to bathe, shave and, mebbe, take a little exercise every day.

    • Count Awesome

      They’re just bummed that in their job as a pizza delivery boy they haven’t gotten laid yet. PORN HAS LIED TO THEM!!!

    • bluicebank

      Yeah, but first we have to teach them math.

  • major_asshole

    Need a little support.

    Boyfriend’s aunt passed away on Monday (heart attack is most likely), and the family planned a memorial service and cremation per her wishes. The whole family is getting together for the service on this coming Monday and a barbecue tomorrow (Sunday).

    Problem is that that side of boyfriend’s family isn’t exactly welcoming to certain groups. One uncle in particular is your stereotypical christofascist asshole–homophobic, transphobic, and so on. Boyfriend is trans. Uncle was here today, saw boyfriend, and said “what’s up girl.”

    I’m tempted to let my gay flag fly proud for the next couple days, but I’m not sure. Would love to stick it to the bigoted jerks, but don’t want to cause problems. And I want to support boyfriend in this difficult time (he was close to this aunt).

    Advice is always welcome, as is anything else.

    • Dept. of Space Tacos

      i know you’re looking for advice, I have none being a straight white cis dude, but I wish you strength.

      • major_asshole

        Eh, you’re good. Sometimes straight guys have great ideas.

        (Yes, intentional sarcasm. I’m a bitch.)

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          lol, my extended family is pretty damn hippy – so I don’t really have these issues.
          Best wishes though.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      ~hugs~ Oh, that’s hard. I’m not good at biting my tongue. I had to jettison my family when they kept misgendering me and otherwise disrespecting my identity and sexuality.

      Are you both willing to suck it up for the day? Will you feel ashamed of yourself if you don’t push back? Where are the lines drawn for you both?

      • major_asshole

        The lines are drawn at causing a scene or causing a panic attack (in either boyfriend or me or both). Minor acts would be tolerated, I think–like if I wore something rainbow and smallish–but I just want to give people dirty looks and that is the very definition of not helping.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          I understand. If you can bite your tongue and he can get through it, then it’s only one day, right?

          I don’t think I could stand down myself, but maybe I could do it for my Sweetie.

          • major_asshole

            I think that barring any better ideas I might just suck it up as best I can and have mind-blowing sex Monday night.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            ~hugs~ Good Luck. I’ll be with you in spirit.

        • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

          Maybe you can hire a really big serious bad-ass looking person to accompany you and stare down all of the people who want to give you trouble.

          That might be an idea that could be developed into a support group of some sort. A league of volunteer bad asses. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not advocating violence. But sometimes a big serious person’s presence might moderate others’ behavior.

          But then, I see downsides to this, too…

    • GreenGoldSharpie

      Unfortunately, it isn’t your place to stand up. Being supportive is your place. :-)

      Since transitioning myself I’ve actually been working to kill one relative with kindness. Not to her, but about her. I ask how she’s doing, I tell my family I don’t want to hurt their relationship with her, and it’s actually led to her social isolation in many regards.

      There are many ways to be confrontational, but not directly so. You just need to find the right one for the situation.

      • major_asshole

        I’d love to hear suggestions if you’ve got any.

    • Rocket Pony Ron

      Though straight and white, I have a rep for being aggressively eccentric. (My daughters are proud of that, and the BFF says it’s why he loves me.) So I know a few things for being supportive without breaking anything.
      My suggestion would be to NOT let the flag fly. Both dress quietly, be subdued, be respectful as you can manage. If trouble might start, let someone else start it – if you’ve been ‘well-behaved’ most people will be on YOUR side. Okay, you might feel as if you’re playing a role… and y’know, you are. But so often, the best way to deal with certain kinds of people IS to play a part.
      Remember, you’re there for HIM. Make the event as comfortable for him as you can. And just maybe you’ll get a few people to think, hey, they’re just like us, what’s the deal?

  • wait! what?

    Always worth a repost.

    Kevin Robertson is the king of the pussy grabbers.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/0c70b75c9592f3e0b3be02f4837686ea11e79cb537f6a9e483259c60f222ffdc.gif

    • gallbladder

      Looks to me like the pussy grabbed him.

      • wait! what?

        I’m sure that’s Donald’s first response whenever he’s asked about his “antics.”

      • Count Awesome

        If you’re doing it right it will.

      • Three Finger Salute

        In Soviet America…

    • Dept. of Space Tacos

      man, I want a lion or preferably a tiger to hug me.
      (folds arms)
      Harrumph.

      • TJ Barke

        You may come to regret it…

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          lol – I LOVE tigers, but AFAIK, every trainer of adult tigers has scars to show you.
          They’re just so strong and deadly, they do it without meaning to.

          • Toomush_Inferesistance

            I dunno – if they’re anything like Pinky, I wouldn’t trust them farther than I could throw them…

      • Christopher Story

        I know a really hairy guy named “Leo.”

      • Panika MCD

        go work at Natural Bridge or the Austin Zoo.

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          oh no, not in real life….sooooooo much poop.

          • Panika MCD

            and stanky poop. the more protein, the more stank.

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            you’re not helping.

          • Panika MCD

            hey! I know what you could get: a ferret!

            no, you could not get a ferret at your current income…just call Bastard Cat “Tiger”!

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            ferrets are stinky things. (Don’t tell Jennifer R i said so).

      • I went to a tiger zoo in Thailand where we got to play with some cubs. One tried to scratch me but he didn’t have claws yet.

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      Good kitty!

    • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

      I’m jumpy today. There is now a dent in the sheetrock of the ceiling above where I was sitting.

      Nice kitty!

      Appropriated.

    • Panika MCD

      I could watch that all day.

    • Rocket Pony Ron

      I used to have dreams about this sort of thing. <sighs>

    • Mormos

      adorable AND terrifying!

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    UNFAIR for Ashley Judd to have said such mean things about Donald Trump’s pussy-grabbing when she had never told anyone about Harvey Weinstein harassing her. This, the MGTOWs concluded, was because Weinstein is Jewish.

    Thanks for your concern, fellas, but if we women have to call out each and every man who has committed sexual violence every time we speak up against one who does so, we’ll never have time to get anything else done…

    …which, come to think of it, might be what you assholes would prefer…

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/43a93a25992a55dbcd44111ac0759eebdce3f4f15cb9f8ee6c1aac7552ac95f0.jpg

    • Panika MCD

      I think that’s part of their plan.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Enough about those assholes–I’ve got to make a special trip to a different store to get the ingredients I need to make something for tomorrow’s bake sale (now I know why I am not a baker by profession!) Leaving for now on this note:

    https://twitter.com/DearAuntCrabby/status/919112049757696001

    • gallbladder

      Mic drop.

      • Lena

        Google is paying 97$ per hour,with weekly payouts.You can also avail this.
        On tuesday I got a brand new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $11752 this last four weeks..with-out any doubt it’s the most-comfortable job I have ever done .. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
        !dy212d:
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      • Nydia

        Google is paying 97$ per hour,with weekly payouts.You can also avail this.
        On tuesday I got a brand new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $11752 this last four weeks..with-out any doubt it’s the most-comfortable job I have ever done .. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
        !du280d:
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    • Christopher Story

      Damnit, stories like that are gonna make me start liking Clooney.

      • Panika MCD

        he’s the husband of a YOOOGE humanitarian lawyer.

        • Christopher Story

          Arrgghh! I know… Just, grrr Clooney! The only man who’s good looks threaten my own ego.

          • Panika MCD

            but he has not had the thought of “let’s put some tequila in this pico”. only truly special people do that.

          • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

            (Um, yeah, but he did make his own brand of tequila, don’t tell Chris, we’re trying to cheer him back up to his original enthusiasm level, which was fucking precious.)

          • Panika MCD

            he and a bunch of other people. you can’t say he did it all by himself.

          • Mormos

            and sold it for like a billion dollars!

          • Christopher Story

            Aww shucks. *hat tip* thank you, kindly

          • bluicebank

            Heh. Try growing up with Robert Redford as the standard.

      • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

        Start liking? In this house his name is pronounced George C-c-c-clooney with eyes dreamily rolled towards heaven.

    • And if your aunt and uncle were Rosemary Clooney and Jose Ferrer, you could be as humble as George Clooney, too.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Are you under the impression that rich people in general support everyone they’re related to, or that Jose Ferrer didn’t do everything he could to marginalize his ex-wife?

        • No. But George Clooney claiming to have grown up in abject poverty are … demonstrably incorrect? Not only the connections to people who were, at the time, Hollywood royalty, but they were also very well connected politically. They might have had some hard times — who doesn’t — but his father was a popular television personality in his own right.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            Except that his father wasn’t always on TV, esp when he was young, so his life wasn’t always that soft (not that small-market tv pays a fortune), and he didn’t move to where his aunt was until he was in his twenties and looking for acting jobs. I’m pretty sure Ferrer was out of there before he was born.

            I take your point that his family was probably some help to him getting where he is, but that doesn’t mean what he said isn’t true.

  • Christopher Story

    Hi all! OT but I think I have invented my very own good thing! Check it out. Me and the Beautiful are calling it “Pico de Christos.” It’s basically my original Pico recipe but now I prepare it with tequila!
    Here’s my recipe if ya’ll wanna try.

    4 Roma tomatoes
    3 cloves of garlic
    2 jalapenos
    1/2 big red onion (otherwise 1 whole one)
    1/2 bundle of celantro
    2 limes
    2 shots of tequila
    Salt to taste

    Instructions: Dice everything and combine it in a jar, then add 1 tequila shots followed by lime juice and more tequila in balance. Let sit for an hour so the flavors can mature.

    The tequila keeps it’s notes even when prepared with other dishes.

    Whatdya think?

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Oh Damn that sounds good! I adore Tequila in anything, especially in me.

      • Christopher Story

        I have a dream of publishing a cookbook full of recipes that require alcohol. I’m also working on a pork fat barbeque sauce that requires beer and bourbon. Haven’t gotten the beer to bourbon ratio quite right, and I only get the right pork fat when I cook spare ribs. So this one is taking longer. But so far, initial tests are promising.

      • redarmyzombie

        I adore having lots of things in me!

        …wait let me rephrase that…

        • theCryptofishist

          Me, also, too, and damned if I’m going to rephrase that!

        • Anna Elizabeth

          xD no need , I’m Sex Positive as well.

    • Plaid Paisley

      That sounds most yummy!

    • Panika MCD

      looks like it’s been done before, but your name for it is much better.

      • Christopher Story

        Awww… Well, I guess the truly great ideas are gonna occur to more than just me.

        • Panika MCD

          still, your name for it beats the fuck out of “Tequila Lime Pico De Gallo”.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      I’m pretty sure that gets better up until the point you’re doing swirlies on the bathroom tiles…

      • Christopher Story

        Hey! Don’t you know you’re not really drunk until you can’t lie on the floor without holding on?

  • Serai 1

    You know what’s more attractive than MGTOW’s? This guy. This guy is more attractive.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d097d320e91feb662d5d408a5ecabe33570d8c5119c0f66e1a585763e2f94f64.jpg

    • Gigglesnort

      He is probably getting some, too.

  • Dept. of Space Tacos

    i referenced a line from this band below (and fucked it up), but anyway, i like singing out loud to this one:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CfOL8VfC7kk

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    For Chrissakes, these assholes keep threatening to go their own way, but they never actually do. There are still desert islands they can move to and form their own secluded village of penis-waving woman-haters.

    • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

      Each with its own “Lord of his fly”.

  • Ricky Gay

    MGTOW’s mom probably used to say “It’s when you are not looking that the right one will come along.”
    And so they took it to its illogical conclusion.
    Sad.Weak!

    • Count Awesome

      Their dicks are so rusty they have to use WD-40 as jack-off lube.

      • Ricky Gay

        Ouch!

      • bluicebank

        And that won’t work, either.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Are they sure it’s the right one and not the left one?

      • Ricky Gay

        Probably have to trade off to avoid carpel tunnel

        • Three Finger Salute

          So that’s what the hokey-pokey was all about.

    • bluicebank

      They have mothers?

      • Ricky Gay

        Embarrassed ones

  • BMW
    • Raan
      • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

        Had my cellphone not rung and broke me out of that seizure, I would still be staring at that with 100% processor load.

        Oh, my head!

      • Thats mental.

    • Rebel Scum with permit

      So you agree with the MGTOW crowd that all women trade work for sex?

      • BMW

        By accusing them of shit-posting?

        • Rebel Scum with permit

          Misunderstood. I thought you were saying I was shit posting. This seems to be my week for various misunderstandings with other commenters.

    • redarmyzombie

      Aaaand this may be my cue to head back to bed…

  • Dept. of Space Tacos

    fuck it – dance party!
    A little 90’s crap (this song is insanely hard to play)
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XIkIPWybuWg

  • Sophia
    • h4rr4r

      Now I need a drink

    • Left Coast Tom

      I’m surprised the ferrets sitting on each of their heads didn’t start fighting.

      • Three Finger Salute

        or worse: mating.

        • Raan

          How could they? They’re both clearly roadkill.

          • theCryptofishist

            Reanimated roadkill.

          • Three Finger Salute

            Zombie ferrets, getting frustrated because they can’t find any brains.

    • Jeffocaster in the West

      He wants to go over there to grab some Virgin pussy, no?

    • Three Finger Salute

      Wow, hella Mirror Universe… they’re both evil, and neither has a goatee…

      • tomamitai

        It’s a Van Dyke, actually. Neil Gaiman corrected me on the matter on Twitter once.

        • Three Finger Salute

          I dunno about Van Dykes, but in that picture I do see two Dicks.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            Ba dum tish!

        • theCryptofishist

          So, tell me, is being corrected by Neil Gaiman better than being corrected by an ordinary mortal?

          • tomamitai

            It was minty fresh!

    • Officially the President least deserving of being cloned

  • Jeffocaster in the West

    OT: Why the fuck do these right wing fundamentalist douche bags think they know what the fuck Jesus would do? I saw a comment Jesus would tweet like Trump. Right. The bible talks all about that. These people are so stupid it is fucking hopeless for this country. Values Summit my ass. Fuck all the likes of them!!!!!

    • Sophia

      The title just doesn’t say how low their values are

    • h4rr4r
      • GreenGoldSharpie

        Does he have a fetlife profile?

        • FukuiSanYesOta

          Heh, I think Jennifer R and I scared people talking about that around Christmas.

    • gallbladder

      Also love how they are so “respectful” of gawd, yet claim to speak on its behalf and re-interpret what it wrote to their liking. It’s my guess that the all-mighty is one incompetent twat.

      • Jeffocaster in the West

        HE created us didn’t HE? EDIT: Frankly I believe the sign of the devil 666 refers specifically to mankind. If there ever was more evil than the human race, i don’t know what it could be.

        • Three Finger Salute

          Man created God in his image. Kicked out all the goddesses and it’s been hell on earth ever since.

      • TJ Barke

        Ever read Genesis? He is one needy, jealous, controlling, mind game playing, fucker.

        • Jeffocaster in the West

          Hmmm, sounds like……need I say it?

        • Three Finger Salute

          Peter Gabriel libelz. He played Games Without Frontiers.

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xZmlUV8muY

        • bluicebank

          Can’t recall where I heard it, but someone once said of the OT God:

          “Sounds like a guy who puts a brick under hat in the middle of the street.”

          • Hemp Dogbane

            The internet has taught me to read that as “said of the Off Topic God.”

      • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

        Well, of course their god is an incompetent twat. After all, they created their god in their own image.

    • bluicebank

      I’m quite familiar with the Gospels, including the textbook Greek translation. Jesus would be railing against the church leaders and overturning their money tables. And hanging out with the hippies. In fact, he was the world’s first hippie.

  • Rebel Scum with permit

    So all women are getting promotions in exchange for sex? I (and millions of other women(and men)) am shocked to find out We Were Doing It Wrong all these years. We were under the impression that this behavior was unethical, immoral, illegal,-and unnecessary.

    • Jennifer R

      At one point in my life I was in quasi serious talks with someone to get a work permit in Canada where my factual work would mostly be giving her blowjobs while she did work from home.

      People will do a lot of things for a better situation. Some people don’t even find it that unsavory. I would rather take a few hot loads to the face in a week than work 40 hours at fast food.

      • Rebel Scum with permit

        I don’t have any issue with sex workers or the sex industry. If that’s the understanding up front, and that’s the job, far be it from me to look down on it. What I do hate is the MGTOW implication that all women trade promotions for sex, no matter what their job.

        • theCryptofishist

          As if our orifices were our only value. These guys are forgetting that it was their mothers (i.e. women) who taught them how to heat up hot pockets.

  • GreenGoldSharpie

    Guys, I have a date early this week.

    With a guy.

    :-D

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Good Luck!

      A new friend and I are planning a Girl’s Day Out next weekend.

    • theCryptofishist

      Hey, if he turns out to be okay, and has a friend…

      • GreenGoldSharpie

        Hee, I’ll put in a good word. We’ve been texting all week, and I really do kinda like him already.

    • FukuiSanYesOta

      Go, Sharpie, go!

    • Christopher Story

      Go get ’em, tiger!

  • Panika MCD

    CJ wants to go to Spider House, but I now have interblag at home. talk me into or out of it?

    • Anna Elizabeth

      CJ has those soulful eyes.

      • Panika MCD

        “they’re buttons!” ~ CJ

        I always thought JJP had the soulful eyes.

    • Dept. of Space Tacos

      saturday night at the spider house? You might find some soulful dude with a guitar playing bad love songs.

      /s

      ; p

      • Panika MCD

        it’s not like that anymore.

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          heh, my gf back then invited me to see some dude. He was one of those guys, pretty sure he loved her. But I dated her.

          (drops mic).

          • Panika MCD

            that’s standard Austin. but Spider House re-did itself to have a full bar.

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            gah!

          • Panika MCD

            but is more boozes!

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            ..

            Good point.

            Heh, is “the library” still open? That’s how I meant the star-crossed gf from back in the day.

            Used to drink $1 shiners there in the 2000’s on Tuesdays.

          • Panika MCD

            yeah, but there are no $1 Shiners anymore.

  • Dept. of Space Tacos

    okay old school punk – i had this on fucking tape in the 90’s, still a classic!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ToHEXSdRmPc

  • gallbladder

    Watched a fascinating documentary last night about the formation and early days of NASA’s mission control group called “Mission Control: The Unsung Heros of Apollo.” We’re talking all the short-sleeve dress shirts, pencil ties, thick-rimmed glasses, Brylcreem, buzzcuts, COM chatter, cigarette, pipe, and cigar smoking you can handle! And, all the biggies: Gene Kranz, Chris Kraft, Jim Lovell, and Gene Cernan. All jest aside, the last few shots in the show are quite stirring. Great stuff.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Sweet! I gotta track that down. Steely-eyed Missilemen. :)

      • gallbladder

        Well worth the effort.

      • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

        oops, shoulda read your post first!

        • Anna Elizabeth

          NP, it’s true, and a cool line. :)

    • DainBramage

      Nice. Just added that to my Netflix list. Thanks.

    • Anna Elizabeth
      • gallbladder

        My father was telling me about that book a few months ago. Gotta borrow it from him.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          It’s now on my want list. :)

          • gallbladder

            “Area 51: An Uncensored History of America’s Top Secret Military Base” is also a pretty neat read.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Cool, thank you! I’ll read anythig about aviation or space.

          • CovfefeOfTheThoughtlessMind

            Martin Caidin wrote a ton of books on aviation, including the best history of the P-38 Lightning I’ve ever seen. He also wrote “Ghosts of the Air,” about some of the strangest and most unexplainable things that have happened to real pilots.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Cool, I know Caidin’s work but I have not yet read that one.

          • FukuiSanYesOta
          • Anna Elizabeth

            Badass! What a jet that was. :) On the list. :)

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            Worth making the trip to see it, in Ohio. It just goes on FOREVER. Very much a product of its times, big, expensive, and it didn’t actually DO anything except go pretty fast. One statistic I love is that to build the only two examples cost about 10 times their weight in GOLD.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Ooh, you’ve sen it? :)

            I’ve been to the SAC Museum, they had a B-58 Hustler, very sexy jet.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            Ah, I was wondering if there was a Hustler somewhere. Gotta see that.
            And yes, I’ve seen the remaining Valkyrie. The USAF Museum in Dayton OH is a must-see for airplane geeks, as is the new (ex-Smithsonian) Air & Space museum at Dulles Airport. I can spend the better part of a day at either, just wandering around saying things like, ‘Oh, wow, I didn’t know there were any of those still around!’

          • Anna Elizabeth

            MM, I hope to see both someday. :) We have a cool little museum at the Pueblo Airport. They have a lot of Warbirds and Navy jets, I even got to climb inside the H-34 that pulled Alan Shepard out of the water after his first space shot. They also let me touch an F9F Cougar.

            And yes, the SAC museum is at Offutt AFB, in Omaha. They had the B-58, and Spartan missiles in 1986.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            If we weren’t around 3000 miles apart I’d be yelling ‘ROAD TRIP’ right about now…

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Yiss! You could crash with me for free anyway. Just food money, then we could roll to Omaha and Dulles.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            TOO kind! And I’d prolly bring all my modelling stuff. As one does.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I’d be disappointed if you did not. :)

      • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

        I’m lazy. Does it count if I just watch “Apollo 13” yet again?

        • Rebel Scum with permit

          Love the scene where they all get out their slide rules.

          • gallbladder

            When Drumpf gets through with NASA, that’s exactly where things will be going back to.

          • Three Finger Salute

            Like everything else that used to be or could have been nice about America, they’ll just migrate north, where they actually have a proud geek who cares about and wants to promote science. Especially women in science.

            Exhibit A: Governor-General Julie Payette.

            https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/78/Julie_Payette.jpg

            Justin, you’ve just solved our problems.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            Hey, we actually HAD a space program for a while, before the costs got stupid. Far as I know the equipment’s still in place.

          • Three Finger Salute

            Can’t find a clip, but there’s one where they empty the space toilets (or whatever they’re called) and Tom Hanks announces that you can get a full view of “the Constellation Urine.” I think that’s what Trump was staring at on eclipse day.

          • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

            I know, right?! We have in my house the huz’s dad’s slide rule mounted on a cool wooden thing, also made by his dad, who was a mechanical engineer. And I remember my brother using one in high school before getting the very first Texas Instruments calculator that hit the home market.

          • Rebel Scum with permit

            I’m afraid I’m old enough to remember when the very first 4 function calculator came out- it was $100.00, back when that was real money.
            I don’t know if they still drill multiplication tables into kids heads anymore, or if that went the way of cursive writing.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          I watch it regularly. :)

          “Swigert gave me the Clap. He’s been pissing in my relief tube.”

    • Dept. of Space Tacos

      it’s not “Failure is not an option”?

      Cause it sounds like that. If not, I may ahve to hunt it down, I love the nerd stuff.

      • gallbladder

        Nope, this is different. I have not seen “Failure Is Not an Option,” though now I’ve an urge to track it down.

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          is available in its entirety for free on youtube.

          Glad we could swap docs, though.

          • gallbladder

            Me too, mate!

      • Pinkham’s Law

        “Appollo One: Well, apparently, failure Is an option, after all. Who knew????

    • Rebel Scum with permit

      If you read Jim Wright much, he maintains that in the Eisenhower years, they were Republicans, not the science denying, government hating, Nazi flag waving loons we have today.

      • Three Finger Salute

        Even William F. Bucktooth tried to purge the Birchers. Nixon brought them back into the fold. It’s been all downhill ever since.

        Thanks, Dick.

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      Steely-eyed missile men, each and every one.

    • CovfefeOfTheThoughtlessMind

      Have you seen “Hidden Figures”? some of those ladies were still with the Apollo Program.

      • gallbladder

        Can’t say I have, though I will definitely look it up!

  • susan_g

    There is a special place for MGTOWs who want to avoid the presence of women. It is called Dave & Buster’s.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Chuckie Cheese’s, where an overgrown man can be the same immature kid.

    • h4rr4r

      I tried to like that place. The games are old enough to be out of date, but not old enough for nostalgia or to be classics. My wife agreed.

      I am such a nerd I got a switch when they first came out. Even for me that place was sad.

    • Count Awesome

      I bet the MGTOW’s are the ones frequenting strip clubs at 11 am and are dying to take the “cheerleader” with the Cesaerian scar and stretch marks home to meet Mom.

      • h4rr4r

        While I upfisted you, be nice that lady has bills to pay.

        • Count Awesome

          True, but she’s just earning a living. He’s the one with stalker tendencies and is only there for the “all you can eat fried lunch buffet”.

          • h4rr4r

            How people can eat in strip clubs I will never understand. I have not gone to many, but you better believe I ordered bottle beer and would have asked for it still closed if I thought they would do it.

          • Count Awesome

            I actually had an interview to work as a cook in one years ago. I had no interest in the job.

          • h4rr4r

            At least that is one kitchen that would never be short of powdered encouragement.

          • starfanglednut

            Wait, what? They serve food in strip clubs? Ew!

          • h4rr4r

            Yup. Some of them have buffets!

        • Rebel Scum with permit

          And deserves better then some of their clientele.

    • Christopher Story

      That requires leaving the basement, and Mom’s fabulous Hot Pockets.

    • therblig
  • theCryptofishist

    The real victims are movie-goers, who had to sit through films with nonsensical casting. There were better actresses out there, who tried out for those rolls, but we do not know them.
    *builds shrine*

  • Jennifer R

    kinda drunk and a little belligerent at 3:52. Good pace for the weekend so far.

    • FukuiSanYesOta

      Killin’ it!

      I think this is my third drink today in the same timezone. Watching beisbol right now. Go Astros!

      • Count Awesome

        There needs to be a time zone drinking crawl. A fee drinks in every time zone and see how far around the world one will get.

        • Rocket Pony Ron

          Do it at one of the poles and no-one would be able to tell if you were following the time zones or just drunk-walking in circles.

      • Jennifer R

        I am slowing killing the last of the rum here. I found enough quarters to buy a hard cider at 7/11 as well if I feel like going out there later.

        • FukuiSanYesOta

          You’ve got this weekend thing down pat.

        • Count Awesome

          Hustle some college kids at a game of quarters and you’re home free.

          • Jennifer R

            Never played. There is a sports bar next to my apartment complex but I doubt I would be very welcome.

          • Count Awesome

            Understandable. Make sure you’re safe.

      • Count Awesome

        As a Dodger fan I’m rooting for the Yankees, just because it actually might be a classic.

        • FukuiSanYesOta

          As a Giants fan, I’m rooting for the Cubs. However, the Dogs have been incredibly impressive this year and Kershaw hasn’t done his usual postseason slump.

          Frankly, I just want to see some good baseball, and Astros/Yankees has been delivering today. Verlander pitching nine? Nice.

          • Count Awesome

            The Dodger-Astro series looks better on paper and would probably be more competitive. I just want to see the Dodgers beat the Yankees in a World Series again, just like 1981.

          • JustDon’tSayConfabulation

            I decided to root for the ‘Stros just b/c I lived in H-town for a couple years. There’s nobody on the team that I remember – except Reddick, cuz he’s ex-A’s.

          • Major_Major_Major

            He was on the A ‘s team that was like the west coast Sox

          • JustDon’tSayConfabulation

            Year or two ago, they were on a roll

    • Dept. of Space Tacos

      you go girl – i was out of class by 9 (test), home by 10. Took a nap, but drinking since 2.

      : D

      • Jennifer R

        I keep meaning to do a little more writing. I got that combat upgrade and made some videos showing it off. Need to keep going. Just right now everything feels so suck and when I can’t sleep about the only thing I can muster is fucked up.

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          i hear ya gurl. I can’t do no more law this weekend. Friday afternoon, I just fucking couldn’t do it anymore. I studied for my test this morning instead.
          I’m sleeping, but only due to total exhaustion.

          • Jennifer R

            Yeah, got a nice buzz going now though. Keep waffling on if I am actually going to eat something or not though.

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            i got breakfast burritos from Whataburger this morning.

            : D

          • Count Awesome

            You are in Seattle, right?

          • Jennifer R

            Sacramento.

          • Count Awesome

            I know nothing about anywhere to eat in Sac-Town anymore. Wish I could help.

          • Jennifer R

            EH I mean, I was digging for quarters for a can of cider, food was gonna be whatever I have here.

          • Count Awesome

            Booze is life.

          • Jennifer R

            It’s not as cheap as the weed I can get here, but it is it’s own kind of numb.

          • Count Awesome

            “Numb and Number”

          • Jennifer R

            That is the goal.
            Might break into my supply of pharma.

          • Jennifer R

            I will be in seattle from the 25th to the 8th though.

  • Dept. of Space Tacos
  • DainBramage

    One of the weirdest Trump parody accounts.
    https://twitter.com/realGollumTrump/status/919335772175720448

    • Wuulf

      My wife has been following Golem Trump for over a month now. It’s hilarious.

    • gallbladder

      What the…

    • Rebel Scum with permit

      I think Trump these days is beginning to make Gollum look well adjusted.

      • gallbladder

        Hell, he’s making Sauron look well-adjusted.

        • Count Awesome

          At least Sauron doesn’t have that awful hair.

        • Rebel Scum with permit

          Sauron was a lot smarter. And had a smaller ego.

    • Crikey!

    • Count Awesome

      So there is a man behind the curtain doing CGI.

    • starfanglednut

      That’s hysterical.

    • Rocket Pony Ron

      Are you sure it’s a parody account and not just Donnie’s stream-of-consciousness?

  • Anna Elizabeth

    This is my favorite song about shooting your way out of a Raid:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1l0xpkk0yaQ

    (the “DA Man” he refers to is a Double-Action revolver).

    Also too, I’m 5’10” myself. :)

  • Dept. of Space Tacos
    • wait! what?

      That’s a great song. Oddly enough, it pairs well with “Jumpin’ Jack Flash” which is playing through the floor of my condo. The downstairs millenials are in Cub pregame mode.

  • Dept. of Space Tacos

    one of my most intense relationships involved a gf introducing me to this song from a texas band:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=is83WB7Ue1Y

  • Shrieking Harpy

    Sniveling little pencil dicks say what?

    • Count Awesome

      “Reducing tax rates will reduce the national debt and help the economy.”

      • Plaid Paisley

        That almost made me do a spit take.

      • Raan

        “Look at how much the stock market went up, the national debt must be pretty much done now.”

  • FukuiSanYesOta

    ASTROS!

  • jackie jones

    Nothing says sexy more than whining men in whining men’s group

    • Count Awesome

      Whiny men in a whining men’s group seems a little rape-y to me.

  • altleftjohn
    • Anna Elizabeth

      I have Green eyes. xD

      • bluicebank

        Then you’ve probably heard this song:

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i_i7PKdQJU4

        • LucindathePook

          Those cool and limpid green eyes
          A pool where in my love lies
          So deep that in my searching
          For happiness I feel
          That they will ever haunt me
          All through my life they’ll taunt me
          Green eyes, make my wish come true
          — Helen O’Connell

      • Count Awesome

        But purple eyes are sexiest.

        • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

          They worked on Jon Snow.

          • Count Awesome

            And Liz Taylor.

      • cheetojeebus

        Orion?

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Aquarius

      • Plaid Paisley

        Plain ol brown eyed girl over here. Nobody ever wrote a song about us. Oh wait. :D

        • Anna Elizabeth

          xD

      • Rocket Pony Ron

        The g/f is proudly bog Irish – stocky, red hair and green eyes. And the temper.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Oooh. :) Sounds like quite a woman.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            Damned straight. I wish like hell she weren’t 600 miles away in a different country. Haven’t seen her in two years now.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            ~hugs~ Long-distance is so hard. I feel for you both.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            TY. It’s hard, and if it weren’t for being together in Second Life every night it would be intolerable.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I hear that. I had a serious long-distance GF, we used YM every night.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            I like SL cuz I can (virtually) snuggle her in the back of my green Chevy pickup, under the enormous oak tree. She has a tiger AV I made for her. Rowr.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Sweet. :) There is something to be said for SL.

  • janecita

    Yay Germany!

    A German Soccer Team Took A Knee In Solidarity With NFL Players Protesting Racism In The US – BuzzFeed News
    https://apple.news/Au8mosmiOQWq3zydExqUiYg

    • bluicebank

      Starting to sounds like a movement a-la Alice’s Restaurant, in three part harmony, natch.

      • Three Finger Salute

        Our national anthem should be called Doucheland Uber Alles.

        • bluicebank

          Either that or “You Can’t Handle The Octave Range.”

          • Three Finger Salute

            For all intents and purposes, it might as well be “Blame Canada.” AKA “To Anachronism in 1811.”

    • Three Finger Salute

      America failed.

      Germany is the one standing up for modern-day Jesse Owens now.

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        In the same stadium where Jessie Owens did it.

    • Paperless Tiger

      It was fun having allies.

  • bluicebank

    Advanced 501 post-grad class for back in the day, re sliding into the sexy time, if you’re into the whole poetry thing and astronomy:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SvrOzYtnLMA

    (Not that the couldn’t-get-laid-in-the-’70s crowd would know a dang thing about the fine art of romance, no matter if one DID strap them to a chair and go all re-education camp on them.)

    • Plaid Paisley

      Playing that would absolutely get my motor running.

  • Dept. of Space Tacos
  • Nounverb911
  • weighmaster

    Welp, it’s official. We’re getting another truck, but this one holds TWO cords of wood.

    • Nounverb911

      Have fun loading it….

      • Plaid Paisley

        And unloading. And stacking.

        • Rebel Scum with permit

          Spiders

        • weighmaster

          It has a dump bed, yay!

          • Plaid Paisley

            Well done!

          • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

            OMG, so jealous.

      • weighmaster

        Firewood is going for $200/cord for split, so no prob.

  • Paperless Tiger

    Try a little tenderness.

  • Dept. of Space Tacos

    drunken shoe shining – this is going to work out well.

    • SisterArtemis

      Pics! Or video of you drunken shoe shining.

      • Dept. of Space Tacos

        woman, have i not suffered enough humiliation!

        • FukuiSanYesOta

          No.

          DO EEEEEEET!

        • SisterArtemis

          What– you don’t think we’d admire you sufficiently?

    • Count Awesome

      At least there will be enough spit for a spit shine.

    • Rebel Scum with permit

      I finally figured out that old saying “doesn’t know shit from Shinola”. Shinola was a pasty brown shoe polish that..well…looked like shit.

      • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

        I learn so many things on my Wonkette! Said to mister, do you know … yeah he knew, says Kiwi pushed Shinola outta the market.

      • Roni Raven, Undercovfefe Agent

        You’re not an old, are you?

        • Rebel Scum with permit

          Not so old….I just feel that way.

          • Roni Raven, Undercovfefe Agent

            That “shit from Shinola” saying was a thing in my family. When I saw it making it to the big screen in Steve Martin’s “The Jerk” I was amazed.

          • Rebel Scum with permit

            Another one in my family was “ would knock a buzzard off a shit wagon” (my dad was the child of a Depression era immigrant family that wasn’t too refined). Since buzzards have no sense of smell, and in rereading the Outlander series I’m being reminded of the implications of a shit wagon, you’re talking about something spectacular.
            I’m sorry those old sayings are falling out of the language. The new ones aren’t as colorful.

    • TJ Barke
      • janecita

        My ten year old son is going through a Gorillaz phase, he loves this song.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          I love Gorillaz, my Baby Girl turned me on to them.

    • Kiri the Unicorn

      One is Shinola, the other is the other thing.

    • gallbladder

      Definitely a “results may vary” opportunity.

  • Nounverb911
    • bluicebank

      Perfect.

    • wait! what?

      “A lot of people don’t realize that you can’t tame fire. That’s why I invented the phrase, and the song, wildfire.”
      – DJT

      • Three Finger Salute

        So, he did start the fire?

        Even though he’s not good at lurnin’ that the earth is turnin’?

    • Rebel Scum with permit

      He hasn’t tweeted word one, has he? Not even “The biggest fire, the best fire, killed more than in Puerto Rico”. Now if there had been a Trump winery in Sonoma…

      • Count Awesome

        If there was a trump winery in Sonoma it would be shittier than “Two-buck Chuck” at twice the price.

        • Raan

          If there was a Trump Winery in Sonoma, it would be a bunch of hobos sitting in a boxcar drinking Thunderbird.

  • Riley Whodat Venable

    Thank you Robyn.
    This is dead on. I’be been watching the angry InCels all over the Internet. They aren’t angry about what Weinstein has done. They are angry because they can’t behave the same way.

    • Three Finger Salute

      See also: Fundamentalist Christians and ISIS…

      • wait! what?

        You can’t spell Christians without isis…

      • Riley Whodat Venable

        Fundamentalists all seem to try to control the same things. Regardless of the religion. I am mystified by the common need of religious fundamentalists to dictate hat regulations.
        Who can wear a hat?
        What kind of hats are acceptable?
        What kind of hats are for men only?
        Must the Clergy wear hats?

    • Count Awesome

      Mad-Libs​ could make a fortune with an incel line.

  • Nounverb911
    • Count Awesome

      When will he tell himself “You’re fired!”?

    • jaspersdad

      The ridiculous American demands for NAFTA are headline news in Canada recently.

      All of Trump’s rhetoric about international trade and US closest trading partner is the only one suffering consequences.

      https://twitter.com/CBCTheNational/status/919042807628746752

      • I am happy to see our team isn’t fucking it up. I would like to be able to order things online for more than 20 bucks without incurring a major penalty, and international booze shipping would be nice

        • Three Finger Salute

          This asshole is taking advantage of Justin’s good nature. He actually said at the presser, “If we can’t come to an agreement, we’ll just have to walk away, and Justin will be fine with that ’cause he’s a nice guy.” Um, no, Dotard, I don’t think he’s going to be OK with that, and he’s not going to agree to any of your other likely “offers” that probably involve your daughter and/or his wife just so you’ll go easy on his country! Fuck Dotard so very much, and not politely, and fuck the Ford Nation morons in the north who actually want a Trump to replace our Justin Trueheart. I should do a Chris Crocker video. LEAVE JUSTIN ALONE!

          • gallbladder

            I imagine that a great many of his impoverished backwoods drones aren’t gonna be fine with a 20 percent uptick in the price of goods either. Then again, FREEDUMB!

          • Three Finger Salute

            YEAH! HAIL LORD TRUMP! HE WHOOPED THAT TURD CUCK REAL GOOD! MAGA!!!!!

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            No way Our Justin is gonna smile quietly and fold. Like so many bullies, Donnie equates good nature with weakness, but there’s locally-made Dofasco steel in that boy’s spine and an excellent brain at the top of it. If NAFTA falls to pieces I can see us simply making a new deal with Mexico to go along with the deals being worked out with Europe and Asia. The only loser will be the US.

          • Three Finger Salute

            Fuck yeah. He’s using the same Brazeau strategy with Dotard — let the other guy blow his wad, get exhausted and then you go in for the final strike. Justin did say Mexico wasn’t going to get abandoned, which Dotard must be annoyed about bigly. Mexico already has visa-free travel with Canada since July 1st of 2016, so maybe he’s a time-traveling prophet after all. Quantum Leaf.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            Extra upfist for ‘Quantum Leaf’!

      • Three Finger Salute

        I still can’t believe Canadians hate this guy and yet Feminist Dad (or his party, anyway) is neck-and-neck with Uterus-Enslaver. What the fuck do they think they’re going to get? Especially if Trump gets ousted and milk boy wants to be BFF with his fellow holy-roller, Pence? Hosers… Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good and don’t let 2019 be 1972 or ’79…

      • gallbladder

        So, Donnie, about improving quality of life for the “middle-class” and all those manufacturing jobs you promised to bring back…

        • Three Finger Salute

          …which are eventually going to be done by robots, an inevitability for the future that only the geek who’s getting ruthlessly and aggressively picked on by the school bully is actually smart and forward-thinking enough to plan for:

          One of the things at the root of the worries or anxieties that so many people have is that they see their jobs being replaced by automation. By AI. By robots. By various innovations and improvements in the technology that surrounds our workplaces. Instead of saying, “OK, well, how do we slow down the pace of automation and protect—through various barriers—our workforce?,” what we’ve chosen to do, and it was at the center of the most recent budget we’ve put forward a month ago, was how do we prepare citizens, our workers, to be part of the revolution in how our workplace functions? How are we encouraging K-to-12 students to learn how to code? How are we encouraging access to university, to career colleges, to technical and vocational schools for our students? But also, how do we take people who are in the workforce already, who are looking at their industry saying, “Wow, I need to change my industry or I need to get significantly more skills if I’m gonna continue to have a job 10 years from now,” and get them back into school? We put an awful lot of money that is focused on retraining and upskilling workers.

          Every time there was a big transformation, whether it was the Industrial Revolution and the steam engine, there was this worry that there were going to be no more jobs. … But I think at the same time, looking at a delay that might have happened 100 years ago or 200 years ago is different from understanding that the pace of change is so rapid that if we start, and we tool up our workforce to be more flexible, more open, more skilled in seeing where the opportunities are, we’re going to be better positioned than anyone else in the world.

          I’m not saying there’s not going to be disruption. [But] we’re doing well because we are back investing in the kinds of things that are making a difference in people’s lives.

          -Justin Trudeau, Bloomberg Businessweek, May 2017

          The economic framework for plan B was already put forth by his father. The real challenge will be in confronting the existential, psychological crisis of millions of people who can no longer define themselves by what their job is — and who might end up going nuts out of, well, Scheer boredom, even if their basic needs of sustenance are provided for. The bottom rung of Maslow’s hierarchy won’t be as much of a challenge in Canada as it will here. It’s the self-actualization part that’s going to be a bigly yuge problem.

          You can’t retrain 36 million people to become computer programmers any more than you can retrain 330 million people to become computer programmers. But at least Canada is not averse to the concept of a safety net, unlike the Randian dystopia of the United States. I don’t doubt that Trudeau has read Durkheim either. But people are not rational, especially in their political habits, and will do everything they can to thwart the inevitability of progress if they think it means a threat to their immediate security and way of life. Alberta : Oil Country :: West Virginia : Coal Country. Bombardier plane builders :: Detroit auto builders. “These are not the droids we voted for.”

          Dotard, however, has not only never read Durkheim, but can’t even read, period. He is a mass suicide crisis in and of himself.

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        This is just donald’s opening gambit. “So, if you don’t like this total shit sandwich, how about we only put half the shit in it? How much shit are you willing to put up with?”

  • Dept. of Space Tacos

    keeping the dance party going – look for the beastie boys cameo and internet points if you can name the song they sampled here:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ewRjZoRtu0Y

    • I really like M.I.A.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      @2:52 for the Boys?

      • Dept. of Space Tacos

        when they hand her a watch in the truck? yeah, that’s it.

    • TJ Barke

      I only know this as the intro to Far Cry 3.

    • Edith Prickly

      Straight to Hell, The Clash.

    • Edith Prickly
  • Count Awesome

    NBC came up with a new game show called of”Who Wants to Suck Off an MGTOW”. It was promptly cancelled because there where no real winners.

    • janecita

      There were no takers either.

      • Rebel Scum with permit

        You said it better

      • Count Awesome

        Only takers were Ivana, Marla, and Melania.

        • Riley Whodat Venable

          They only did it for the prizes.

    • Rebel Scum with permit

      Or even women who agreed to be contestents

    • On a positive note it’s the quickest 50 bucks anybody could earn.

      • TJ Barke

        I’d give them 50 bucks not to…

      • Count Awesome

        You’d probably get a 1099 as an independent contractor though.

    • Plaid Paisley

      Sounds like a Burnett joint

      • Count Awesome

        Isn’t his wife Roma Downey? It would be very “Christian”.

        • Rebel Scum with permit

          Oh No. Now I have visions of her clasping her hands and passionately crying “but God LOVES you” somewhere in the middle of the proceedings.

          • Three Finger Salute

            Touched By Someone Who Isn’t Exactly an Angel

    • Panika MCD

      NBC? I thought Duck De’nasty was on TLC…

    • Edith Prickly

      There was not enough money or alcohol in the world to make that happen.

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Been dancing to this all day: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGBLlFMn9Xc

    • Dept. of Space Tacos

      i’ve got a fitz album, nice ole school style tunes.

    • Edith Prickly

      LUUUUUVV this tune! Ever seen Fitz and the Tantrums live? They are amayy-zing.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        No, I would love to though! :)

        • Edith Prickly

          I hope you get the chance! Crazy high energy and fun.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I hope so too, thank you. :)

  • Paperless Tiger

    Harvey Weinstein Ousted From Motion Picture Academy. — NYT.

    Damn. Tinseltown has higher standards than the Capital. What a country!

    • They usually have

    • Count Awesome

      Hollywood can be almost as progressive as the best parts of California.

      • Three Finger Salute

        Can be. If they want to.

        I’m not being impatient but I’m recognizing that the work isn’t done yet, and they can’t just call it a day because they booted out Weinstein. Polanski, Allen and countless others still need to be blackballed.

        • Count Awesome

          Agreed. All the shits coming out of the woodwork now.

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      Hollywood is more important to international diplomacy, if you think about it.

  • Anna Elizabeth

    For my Darling Boys that need Dating practice – watch the Brunette and the cute guy in this video:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CfihYWRWRTQ

    • Plaid Paisley

      Anything for darling girls who fail at this stuff?

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Sure. :) What kind of advice do you need? It seems guys still like to approach more than be approached. You can learn to send clear signals though.

        • Plaid Paisley

          I was so enamored at how cute that video was, and then the end! What?!

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Oh, I know. :)

            I love that she ditches her date for the cute guy.

          • Plaid Paisley

            Her date seems like he’s a dick, like he probably negs her a lot.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I agree, total Douche.

            Yeah, signal a cute guy with the looking, and a little smile, and if he approaches, encourage him. :)

          • Plaid Paisley

            All the dancing was totally adorable!

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Isn’t it? I love the long-haired girl in the slacks, she can move!

          • Plaid Paisley

            Yes! Me too. My first thought on the dance floor scenes was “wow, that’s how people actually dance at parties” as opposed to the booty kind of grinding you tend to see at clubs.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Me too! xD I usually grind, so I’ve been trying to move like her now.

  • I was all excited to go see Marshall this weekend….and it’s not playing anywhere in town

    • Panika MCD

      sorry.

      • My sister and i also want to see The Foreigner, so if it’s still raining tomorrow, that may be the plan

        • Count Awesome

          I hope that is the Jackie Chan movie and not the shitty 80’s band.

          • Jackie Chan. The trailers make it look very interesting

          • commatoes

            People do not realise that he is a classically trained Chinese actor along the lines of RADA. He just makes a ton more money doing the typical Jackie Chan movie. I have never seen him in a dramatic role so this is on my watch list.

  • Angela Ruzzo

    A week or so ago I wrote about the 3 twenty-something guys who live 2 houses away from me, one of whom parked his pickup truck (hauling a boat on a trailer) in his driveway so as to block the sidewalk and stick 6 ft. out into the street (violating County, State and Federal laws). I had to call the Sheriff about this as said guys are never home to answer their door. They became annoyed, but they did move it – to the grass next to the house, which is a violation of the HOA Covenants. When the HOA sent them a firm letter about this, they became even more annoyed and expressed their annoyance to me personally. The problem was one of them turned out to be a Sheriff’s Deputy (Trainee). So I went to see the Sheriff to discuss the bad behavior of one of his boys. Sheriff Dwayne (why are they ALWAYS named Dwayne?) was very nice, and we discussed the public image of the Sheriff’s Department and how his employees might enhance or damage that image for about half an hour. I asked him if he had ever heard of John Donne’s poem “No Man Is An Island” and I was not surprised when he said “No.” I gave him a printed copy of it, which he read, but he made no comment. Sheriff Dwayne is 50 years and has a bachelor’s degree in something-or-other, but has never heard of one of the most famous poems in the English language. What are they teaching people in our schools? P.S. he coaches high school football in his spare time. Of course he does.

    • Count Awesome

      In Mississippi they no longer allow “To Kill A Mockingbird” in public schools because some find the langaige offensive.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        Which language do they find offensive, exactly? The bit about not killing defenceless living things, or the bit about lynching a black man for daring to feel sorry for a white woman?

        • Count Awesome

          I didn’t read the article but bet it was about sympathy for the innocent black guy.
          Side note: the guy that played the cousin eat in the movie was at one point a teacher of mine.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            I remember they used the words “negro” and “colored” several times, but I really don’t remember anything that would offend a rational person with an above-average IQ.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            You MIGHT have put your finger on the issue right there.

    • Three Finger Salute

      #NotAllDwaynes are douchebros or morans…

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CVuj6MqoVUo

      • Angela Ruzzo

        Very true. However, I wish someone could explain to me why I’ve had three bosses named Carl (var. Karl), and every one of them was an asshole. I’m sure there MUST be some nice Carls out there, possibly one of them is a Wonker, if so please identify yourselves so I can throw this unpleasant stereotype away.

        • SeekingCovfefeBarbie

          Sorry, can’t help you. My father’s name was Carl and he was a horrid man.

        • Three Finger Salute

          Well, at least we know not all Justins are hosers.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            Are there any nice “Erics” out there? Because I have 2 cousins and a cousin-in-law and a neighbor named Eric, and they are all redneck idiots who ought to be in prison.

          • Three Finger Salute

            Eric McCormack, aka Will from Will & Grace?

            Cannot vouch for the niceness of Eric Trump, aka Qusay Busay. Or Erik Prince, who is A Bigly Asshole and so is his sister Betsy Wetsy DeVil. But per the statement above about not all Justins being hosers (or Bieber McDweebers), there’s also… Prince Eric.

            http://kitodiaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/tweet6.jpg

          • Angela Ruzzo

            I have never watched “Will & Grace” but I will give it a try. Prince Eric is adorable (both of them), but I haven’t seen “The Little Mermaid” either. In the original Mermaid story, the Prince is a jerk, so I assume Disney took liberties with the story.

          • CindyinEncinitas

            No.

        • Edith Prickly

          I have a colleague named Carl who is a good guy.

          • CindyinEncinitas

            Are all Vinces douchebags?

    • Panika MCD

      mine is a Sally and she’s read Donne. but just because he wasn’t familiar with it, doesn’t mean he didn’t have to read it in high school. I’m sure there’s plenty of what you learned in high school that you have forgotten. and if you’re going to give a sheriff poetry, I would recommend Maurice Manning, Thomas Lux and Thomas Sayers Ellis as starters. the 18th Century is one of my favorite periods of Brit Lit, but you have to start people with something they can find a foothold in.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        Those are excellent suggestions, but as the topic of our conversation was how people don’t live in isolation, and how their smallest actions can affect other people’s lives (particularly when they are wearing a uniform and a badge and carrying a gun), and how you can’t do anything you want any time you want to irrespective of the laws just because you are a spoiled white boy with an excessive sense of personal entitlement, Donne’s poem seemed the most relevant.

        • Panika MCD

          you also too really can’t say none of the three poets I mentioned had poems which would have been appropriate to get that across. themes tend to repeat in poetry. you really can’t hand someone who’s not already into poetry something from the 18th Century–it just doesn’t work. if you’re not going to go with any of those, just grab some Robert Frost. he wrote a lot about that.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            Yes, all those poets have addressed that theme, but none of them did it as beautifully and as succinctly as Donne did in less than 10 lines, in my opinion. The Lettermen even adapted it for a rather badly-scored hit song in 1968.
            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WImkf0V7u-4

          • Panika MCD

            but if you’re not familiar with 18th Century Brit Lit, it’s just fucking confusing. I get that you have a personal relationship with the poem, but when you are presenting poetry to another audience, you need to consider that audience. which is what you seem to be refusing to do.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            I don’t think it’s confusing at all, and I think I was carefully considering the audience. When one wants to introduce someone to a meaningful poem that addresses a particular issue, it is best to use a poem that is particularly meaningful to the person presenting it because they can explain it with great feeling, if explanation is necessary. When doing this to a person you don’t know who may or may not be literate, it is best to use a short poem. I am quite familiar with British Literature, and I don’t think there is a better short poem addressing this particular issue than Donne’s.

          • Panika MCD

            it really is more important to present something that is accessible to the audience than it is to present something that you have a personal relationship with. PERIOD. I went to school for this. and I’m saying: USE CONTEMPORARY AMERICAN POETRY. if you don’t have as much affinity for some of the stuff coming out now, you probably need to read some more to find it. presenting a local sheriff with a poem by a British aristocrat who was flipping off the church is not going to really have the effect you want it to. it’s just not. don’t get all pissy and act like he might not be literate. you considered your feelings over your audience’s feelings and that almost never works.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            Well, the problem here is that you don’t think Donne’s poem is “accessible to the audience” and I happen to think exactly the opposite. Donne’s motivation and social standing is irrelevant (he was not an aristocrat), as neither is obvious in a straight reading of that poem. And I do not take instruction from anyone in what kind of poetry I should like or study or use for communicating my ideas. You are being a poetry fascist.

      • Rocket Pony Ron

        This is true. I know there’s a rather elegant way of calculating pi using differential equations, but do you think I can remember it now, 42 years later?

        • Angela Ruzzo

          I couldn’t remember how to calculate pi one week after I graduated from high school, let alone now, 43 years later. I do, however, remember all the books and poems and plays I read, particularly Great Expectations which bored me to tears at age 12, and which was so much better at age 22. Les Miserables was definitely over our heads at age 14, but I’m glad they made us read it, as it, too, improved with age.

    • Dwayne Dibbly!

      Red Dwarf FTW https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ba489d0ca2569f0baf817df5ecd14a739559c92d633c58acb249cc1c557e2b2f.jpg

      Nice work trying to educate the uneducated, but I’ve found it’s an exercise in futility.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        Yes, it is, but it sometimes pays to let them know, in a calm and polite way and between the lines, that you know about 1000X more than they do so they better not try to fuck with you. He didn’t try, and I think he got the message.

        Mr. Sheriff’s Deputy had the nerve to tell me that I am not allowed to research and interpret the laws unless I am a member of law enforcement. This was the primary subject of my conversation with Sheriff Dwayne, and we also touched on the obligations of citizenship and the responsibilities that come with freedom, as well as the social contract between individuals. I don’t think he will forget me.

        • Im not suprised. Actually I am suprised he didn’t try to shoot you.

          Law enforcement officers do not like civilians telling them the law, or being filmed when they decide to circumvent their own laws.

          Personally I tend to avoid them when possible.

          Good for you for being brave, and smart.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            Thanks, but I thought it was necessary, as I do not intend to spend my retirement living 200 feet from a Sheriff’s deputy who hates my guts, and I wanted to avoid a neighborhood feud. I scripted the conversation carefully, and played the “sweet-but-sharp-as-a-tack elderly white-haired disabled lady” part very well.

          • I really thing you should be my neighbor, I have no boats or trucks, I do have a wicked vege garden.

            Also there’s a lawnmower around here somewhere…

          • Angela Ruzzo

            I would love to have you as a neighbor, but when I moved to this house 8 years ago I swore an oath that I would never move again, unless I win the lottery, and then I’m moving to England.

          • We have better weather, and universal health care, and sensible gun control laws.

            Now I’m just bragging, Australia is pretty awesome tho.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            You got that right. I am watching Season 17 of “Escape to the Country” and after only 12 episodes, I have already seen three houses I covet, one in Wales, one in Cornwall and one in Devon. Problem is the cheapest one was £650,000 (but it came with your own flock of sheep!). The best one started out as a cottage in the 14th century, got an addition in the 16th century with some really beautiful Elizabethan brick work, and a modern wing just 20 years ago with a gorgeous conservatory. I was drooling… Unfortunately, if I sold my current home and everything I own I might be able to come up with £150,000.

          • That’s like what, half a million AUD.

            I’ll sell you my 160 acre property for less than that, house, shed, dams, Wells, freshwater spring, thousands of gigantic trees and about 40 cows 🐄

            I’ll even throw in a few sheep 🐑

            Kangaroos, Koala, possums, other unidentifiable wildlife, potentially deadly but maybe not.

            England is so very old, I love it there for that, castles are awesome. I can’t deal with the constant cold tho.

            Australia is still young, wild and free.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            Shit, I just saw another house I covet on “Escape To The Country” – a 5-bedroom 3-story house in Herefordshire with a beautiful garden, a greenhouse and mature apple trees, built in 1901, for only £575,000. That’s $764,000 US and $966,000 AUD.

            Australia is beautiful, but it’s too wild for me at age 61 – too many critters that want to kill me. And yes, England can be cold and damp, but where I live it regularly gets to minus 10 F in the winter, with the occasional 18″ snowfall, and in summer it regularly gets to 100 degrees F in July and August, with 96% humidity, so in contrast England is not so bad. It’s the history in England I love…I went there 3 years ago just to see King Richard III re-buried, and I think I had more fun than is strictly legal for 58-yr-old women in some countries.

            I lived in a very rural area for 2 years with a well and a septic system and a spring and a creek and lots of trees. When the temperature fell below 25 degrees F, the pump would freeze, and by February and the septic system would leak because the ground was frozen hard as a rock. It was an interesting lifestyle, but I wouldn’t care to do it again.

            It sounds like you have a beautiful place to live. Do you really want to leave it?

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      I’m betting he has a BA in Football Studies, and graduated with a solid 2.0 GPA. Probably from a local Div. II state school.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        According to his bio, he graduated from a local junior college that is apparently now issuing bachelor’s degrees, but the article did not say what his field of study was.

        • Riley Whodat Venable

          When I first moved to Houston I kept meeting all these people who said they were Wharton graduates. More than I had ever met anywhere.
          Then I learned that Wharton County Junior College is about 30 miles outside of Houston. Not to knock WCJC. They have first rate programs in Nursing and HVAC.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            We have a similar situation here. The junior college is called “Columbia College” and people often say they “graduated from Columbia” which leads strangers to think they graduated from prestigious Ivy League “Columbia University”.

      • CindyinEncinitas

        Nice trash talk there! You must be an athlete. They talk the best trash. Them and firemens.

        • Riley Whodat Venable

          Never was much of an athlete. I do have cops in my extended family. The ones under 35 fit the profile I listed. The older ones were thugs who used family connections to get into the Police Academy, where they were thugs on the public payroll.

    • miss_grundy

      Perhaps his Bachelor’s degree is in Phys Ed????

  • Panika MCD

    I feel bad about not taking CJ out. she’s wearing her Wonder Woman BUG! outfit and wants o show it off, but we’re supposed to go somewhere with her Unkle Alien (Brother) tomorrow. is it mean to not let a fox terrier strut her stuff?

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Naw, she will enjoy tomorrow. You probs needed the rest. :)

      • Panika MCD

        it’s hilarious that she loves this outfit so much even though it isn’t the best fit.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Awws.

  • Nounverb911

    There’s always a tweet, even a nasty one about Verlander.
    https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/258208796839657472

    • Panika MCD

      wonder if he knows what ERA means in a political context…nah, I don’t have to wonder. he doesn’t. he probably doesn’t know what it means in a sportsball context either.

      • wait! what?

        I imagine he says the same thing about Anthony Rizzo.

    • jaspersdad

      Meh. The Expos are out again.

      • Three Finger Salute

        You read my mind :)

    • FukuiSanYesOta

      So he knows as little about beisbol as everything else. I’m shocked.

    • miss_grundy

      Leave Justin alone, you mango-colored shitgibbon! Justin used to be a Tiger.

    • Count Awesome

      Verlander doesn’t care what Trump says cuz he’s fucking Kate Upton.

  • Jennifer R

    OK SO
    I am going to make some onion rings and have the last sip of this rum. And then decide where to go from there.

    • I have sour cream and onion chips

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        Are nonions onions for carnivores?

        • Or just a typo….or super special Canadian onions. You’ll never know…

          • gallbladder

            Francophone onions.

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            What we call les oinions.

          • FukuiSanYesOta

            Oig-NONS!

            Really bolshie Alliums.

      • Rocket Pony Ron

        Which kind? If I’d known I coulda got you some.

        • Ruffles. My new building has a variety store outside the lobby doors. It’s ridonkulously handy

          • Rocket Pony Ron

            I’ve been alternating between Old Dutch (smooth but a bit oily) and Sensations Extreme (sometimes a tad dry) sour cream and onion chips lately. Haven’t found perfect ones yet but the quest is by no means over!

      • Count Awesome

        Pringles or GTFO!

        • FukuiSanYesOta

          Philistine colonial.

          • Count Awesome

            How dare you call me a colonial.

          • FukuiSanYesOta

            Do you prefer “terrorist”?

          • Count Awesome

            You are just being an agent of “Big Potato”.

          • CindyinEncinitas

            Invader?

    • bluicebank

      Right arm. I’m looking longingly at the chips & salsa, with some screwdriver except mixing OJ w. lemonade 1:1 for what I call Refreshing.

    • commatoes

      Beer and quesadillas.

      • Jennifer R

        I mean, go get a cider or just sleep. Maybe take a pill and sleep extra.

        • commatoes

          My last experience “mixing and matching” had me transported home in a shopping cart by my friends. Though they did check on me through the night, the Sharpie graffiti on my chest took forever to wash off.

          And benzo’s make me wake up in strange places.

          • Jennifer R

            I am already home, and won’t be doing an combinations of things. I am way too thin on stuff I need for far too many things to waste a bunch on feeling shitty when a little on feeling shitty will do the job.

          • CindyinEncinitas

            Have you tried tincture? It’s fun and not dangerous. If I do it I can only drink one pint of IPA.

          • Jennifer R

            Edibles aren’t cost efficient for me. my dose is between 100-150 mg.

          • CindyinEncinitas

            Oh wow. Mine is about 25-30.

  • Meanie-meanie, tickle a person

    Dit-dit-dit-dit-dit-dit-dit-dit
    Ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma
    Ooh mow-mow, baba ooh-mow-ma-mow
    Baba ooh-mow-mow, baba-MGTOW
    Well, don’t you know about the Bird?
    Well,this finger that I’m holdin’
    Baby, that’s the word…

    Garbage men, Trashmen, hey, poetic license, right?

  • Dept. of Space Tacos

    the anthem of self-destruction:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6xcwt9mSbYE

  • Doug Langley

    I can’t believe it’s pitch black out and not even 8:00 yet. I’m still set on summer time.

    • TJ Barke

      Even though it’s fall now, summer hasn’t quite gotten the memo.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        was 80F Thursday here, upper 60’s yesterday and today.

      • Rebel Scum with permit

        It will be pushing 100 here inland SoCal the next few days, but climate change is a myth. The nights have cooled off and the sun isn’t quite as intense so that helps.

      • Count Awesome

        Global warming!

        • TJ Barke

          Ghinese Hoax!

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        And, in a few weeks, Daylight Savings Time is right off….

        • Count Awesome

          Another reason for me to hate George W. Bush is that he moved the clock change. My birthday is in late October and every time my birthday fell on a Sunday I got an extra hour of sleep. That’s a birthday gift that never stopped giving.

          • Toomush_Inferesistance

            They had to give him something he could accomplish…

      • Doug Langley

        Well, fine with me. At work they don’t have a desk or chair or anything for me, just half a shelf to put my belongings. So I have to leave my jacket in the car. Glad the weather’s warm.

  • miss_grundy

    And the MGTOWs wonder why they are all alone and lonely. It is because they suck as human beings. But now that AMPAS has ejected Weinstein out, does he have to return the Oscar he won for Best Picture for “Shakespeare in Love”?

    • Count Awesome

      They think they are just like James Bond, but instead of the mink glove they have a battered orange colored glove made of carpet.

    • Three Finger Salute

      It would be the ideal situation, like Lance Armstrong losing his jerseys and his wins being revoked, or Olympic cheaters having their medals vacated. The award instead gets given to the next-runner-up. But, I doubt they’ll go that far, and I’m not being a purist. I’m glad that something is being done about this guy, but he’s not the only one, and the industry can’t be allowed to lean back and say they solved “the problem” of sexism in the entertainment world. They need to have their feet held to the fire and always be pressured to do more.

    • I do love that movie, it is cute and funny and smart. But it really should not have won XD

      • CindyinEncinitas

        It was that yellow dress at the end. Everyone was hypnotized.

  • bluicebank

    Song for the squares 9aka MGTOWS, incels, whatever … THIS is how your mom & dad got down or maybe not, but an incel can dream:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OQgftmOeK_c

    • therblig

      thelma ritter FTW! sadly, 6 noms but no wins.

  • Rocket Pony Ron

    I’m perfectly happy to see these ‘men’ going their own way, and may they continue to go until they’re out of sight. But why the fuck do they feel the need to announce every inch of their journey?

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Because otherwise we’d never know they were “gone”.

    • Raan
    • Count Awesome

      They couldn’t adapt to allowing women to vote or drive so I say “Fuck “em”

      • Three Finger Salute

        They must be really pissed about Saudi Arabia.

        • Count Awesome

          For a moment I thought you said “Saudi Alabama”.

          • Three Finger Salute

            WhyNotBoth.jpg

  • Picabo
    • That’s the History Network, sweetie. A&E was all about serial killers

      • commatoes

        They don’t broadcast in Canada (I think, I don’t got the bucks for the premium cable) but there is a military history channel. Basically, guns, bombs, war plane, war ships, military strategy, etc. 24 hours a day.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          MHC is a good channel, they actually have what their name is.

          • commatoes

            The residue of Ancient Aliens on the History Channel and Duck Dynasty on Arts & Entertainment kind of soured me a channel actually doing what they claim to do.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I hear that. I *liked* it when History had docs about German tanks and the American Civil War.

          • CindyinEncinitas

            Vice is my new favorite channel. Lots of good shows. Deezus and Mero is my fave, although I am still trying to learn the lingo.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I don’t think I’ve seen Vice. What do they have?

          • commatoes

            They have an eclectic selection of cooking show. Weird I know. Matty Matheson has a show on it and I really like his place in Toronto, Parts & Labour.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Sounds good. I used to non-stop on Food Network before it was all competitions, and I do still watch “Chopped” sometimes. Chopped is very Queer-positive.

          • CindyinEncinitas

            Alternative alternative programs like Bong Appetit, which is a cooking show that cooks with weed, Huang’s World, which is this guy who explores cultural issues, Deezus and Mero is a talk show, they do great news, it’s great.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Sounds awesome! :)

          • CindyinEncinitas

            I just learned that I might not be getting a fine crumb on my bread because of my chi. I suspected that, so the validation is great.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            xD

          • CindyinEncinitas

            This show is awesome. And there’s one called Weediquette and one called Hamilton’s Pharmacopeia. Alternative voices. This Huang guy just featured an interview with a gay lucha libre guy in Ciudad Juarez. So trippy.

          • Three Finger Salute

            No music on MTV, not one video hit on VH1, and no news on CNN or Fox News. How more people haven’t “cut the cord” already is beyond me. It’s crap. 500 channels of crap.

        • Three Finger Salute

          I miss Cancon in America. My first introduction being when I was a kid and we were one of the first on the block to get cable. Nickelodeon was so much better in the 80s when it was almost entirely Nelvana cartoons, Sharon, Lois & Bram, and Fred Penner’s Place. I found out recently that CBC had their own Mister Rogers, called Mister Dressup — and that the actor was actually Fred Rogers’ understudy for the American show.

          • commatoes

            Grew up on Mister Dressup. Any middle aged Canadian will have fond memories of the phrase “Tickle Trunk” and Casey and Finnegan.

          • Three Finger Salute

            Then there’s Téléfrançais (the talking pineapple show from Québec television), which is a cult-favorite meme for some reason (probably due to the infectious earworm theme song, the Sid and Marty Krofft-esque puppet characters, and the fact that Canadian television is kind of a cultural acid trip). But it’s actually a pretty cute puppet show with legitimate educational value (like how Sesame Street used to have segments that taught Spanish), and apparently is still used in Canadian schools to teach French.

            I kind of wondered, but apparently the girl in this show, named Sophie, is not the Sophie (Justin’s wife), even though they look to be about the same age for the time. She appears to be about 7-8 years old, the segments had their first run airing in the early to mid ’80s and Sophie Grégoire-Trudeau was born in 1975. But, not her.

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rBSflK1FTSY

          • H0mer0

            that is so adorable!

    • Raan
  • weighmaster
    • Looks like some kinda vehicle.

      What am i missing?

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        It’s got electrolytes.

        Also, it’s kinda cool.

      • weighmaster

        Two cord truck with dump bed, we’re just weird.

    • Count Awesome

      That shits needs to be whitewashed and spray painted with “Fuck Trump”.

      • Everything does, mountains and all.

      • weighmaster

        I like that, but would probably interfere with sales around here.

        • Count Awesome

          Do something creative that is hidden or just pure sarcasm.

          • Raan

            An airbrushed Statue of Liberty.

          • H0mer0

            or Lady Liberty and Justice making out.

    • Farm truck ftw!

    • Very nice. Now keep it off 301 between 430 and 5 pm and I will not wish its axle would fall off.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      Do it dump?…..

      • weighmaster

        The pto shaft turns, we’ll have to fill it with hydraulic fluid to find out for sure but it should.

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    Blade Runner 2049! FTW!

    • Fair call. Tho i have not yet seen it.

    • BMW

      Good movie. I’m bugged that people are calling it a “flop” even though it made $30 million the first weekend and was the #1 movie. The movie business has become so cut throat that you have to make $100 million the first week or you get called a failure.

  • Jennifer R

    @disqus_o6Kj0yjcrp:disqus I know that you were being kept abreast of this at one point, but I thought you might like to know I actually did that overhaul to combat I was talking to you about some months ago.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Sweet! So you found it was worth the overhaul?

      • Jennifer R

        Yeah, it took a few hours instead of the days I was worried about. I still need to adjust individual stats for enemies but at least that is a better problem to have. Also have a video of it.
        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=znuZlA3KWr4

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Very cool! It reminds me of the old-skool RPGs on our Commodore 64, those were always a blast.

          Looks like you licked this part, huh?

          • Jennifer R

            Yeah, so once again I just need to get with the writing of the story.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            You will. :) You’ve made so much progress, don’t be too hard on yourself.

          • Jennifer R

            Thank you <3

          • Anna Elizabeth

            <3

  • MasRioBravoHombre

    All of this asininity can be traced to their teeny, tiny tallywhackers.

    • I never imagined in my wildest dreams I would see the word tallywackers actually used in a sentence.

      What a world.

      • Isn’t it awfully nice to have a penis?
        Isn’t it frightfully good to have a dong?
        It’s swell to have a stiffy.
        It’s divine to own a dick,
        From the tiniest little tadger
        To the world’s biggest prick.
        So, three cheers for your Willy or John Thomas.
        Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake,
        Your piece of pork, your wife’s best friend,
        Your Percy, or your cock.
        You can wrap it up in ribbons.
        You can slip it in your sock,
        But don’t take it out in public,
        Or they will stick you in the dock,
        And you won’t come back.

        • Somebody give this person the internet.

          • I believe if you do a serious study you will find Monty Python already owns the internets.
            With the cats.

          • Bemused Tralfamadorian

            When the term spam is derived from your work, the internet is indeed yours.

          • Three Finger Salute

            Well, that takes care of that asshole who claimed he invented email.

          • Bemused Tralfamadorian

            True. And Al Gore is completely fucked!

        • Bemused Tralfamadorian
    • Count Awesome

      Will there be a police lineup to identify the said tallywhacker or do we need to call in a police sketch artist? Asking for Miss Ballbricker.

  • Picabo

    Today in history, 1994. “On this day in 1994, the writer-director Quentin Tarantino’s Pulp Fiction, a crime drama featuring multiple storylines and a large ensemble cast including John Travolta, Uma Thurman, Samuel L. Jackson, Bruce Willis and Harvey Keitel, opens in theaters. Made for less than $10 million, Pulp Fiction earned more than $100 million at the box office and was also a huge critical hit, winning the Palme d’Or at the Cannes Film Festival and earning seven Academy Award nominations, including Best Picture.”
    http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history/pulp-fiction-debuts

    • Count Awesome

      And he has done nothing worthwhile or original since.

      • Jackie Brown LIBULZ

        • Count Awesome

          He’s a cut and paste artist. He takes the best parts of movies he watched when he was a video store clerk and strings them together. Harvey Weinstein approved.

          • huh, twice in a row? ok then.
            JACKIE BROWN LIBULZ!!!!! srsly, it was probably his best effort, and I think, a damn good movie.
            Gratuitous violence and all.

          • Count Awesome

            Tarantino writes good dialog, but a lot of what he does is homage, as in using/stealing plot devices from foriegn movies people haven’t seen and calling it his own. Also, how many times can one bear to hear “N—–” in not just “Django Unchained” (Christoph Waltz was the best part of that film) but in other movies.

          • Bitter Scribe

            Tarantino is a Violence Nerd, like John Irving. They depend on violence for cheap thrills to string the audience along.

          • Count Awesome

            I will agree with that. He also seems to be a mysoginst and the Countess pointed that out.

          • Absolutely and I do not care for most his stuff.
            But I loved me some Jackie. That might be Pam, whom I adore.

          • Count Awesome

            Pam is awesome.

          • calliecallie

            John Irving? Garp Libelz! Maybe what is perceived as violence nerdism is just an active imagination that focuses on all the bad things that can happen. I heard John Irving talk about that being a writer’s curse, and I could totally relate.

          • Arolpin

            John Irving is a tragedy nerd; Pat Conroy is a violence nerd.

          • Bitter Scribe

            They’re both violence nerds. The difference is that with Conroy, the good guys win in the end.

          • therblig

            to be honest, waltz is usually the best part in anything he’s in. even the green hornet. even this…
            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UK2TZWiLdLQ

          • Count Awesome

            I was really liking “Django Unchained” until Leo showed up on screen and then the movie was like watching someone else have their teeth pulled.

          • BMW

            It’s called an “homage.” And when he takes things from different sources, he puts them together in a way that is actually entertaining…unlike 90% of other films released which take old old ideas and recycle them into garbage.

          • Count Awesome

            I won’t pay to see any of his films at this point. His homage is veiled misogyny and racism. He acts like a tough guy but is far from it.

          • BMW

            Depicting something condoning it aren’t the same things.

    • OrG

      Great soundtrack album too.

    • calliecallie

      We were just talking about Pulp Fiction as a family recently. Good times.

  • Bitter Scribe

    But they sure do spend a whole lot of time whining about us and how evil we are.

    JFC, don’t they just? I’ve said this before, but if you want to be a MGTOW, just go your own fucking way already and STFU about it.

    • How are they going to achieve victory if women are not noticing them going, hhhnnnggg?
      Think of these things, Scribe, shesh

    • Panika MCD

      I think their way is whining as much as possible.

      • mailman27

        MGTO Way intersects with Whiny Un-Attractive Blvd.

  • Tiffany de Houston

    I’m so happy! Next weekend I’ll be going to pick up my new German Shepherd puppy. It’s a girl. Yay me!

    • Whatcha namin her?

      • Tiffany de Houston

        I don’t know just yet. Do any Wonkers have some ideas?

        • German Shepherd girl….hmmm….
          Ava? Annie? PANZER?????

        • Toomush_Inferesistance

          I had a German Shephard once, named Nickeldime. Smartest dog friend I ever had….

          • They are very smart pooches

          • Three Finger Salute

            At least you didn’t name him/her Nickelback…

        • Roni Raven, Undercovfefe Agent

          Hillary.

          • snicker. Then we can say what a tough bitch Hillary is?

          • Roni Raven, Undercovfefe Agent

            Naturally.

          • CindyinEncinitas

            Hey you.

          • eggs ackly-wright

            Goddammit.

          • commatoes

            Stephen Wright joke. Name a dog “Stay”.

            Stay Stay. Come here Stay. Get the ball Stay.

          • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

            That’s just wrong.

            {{{giggle-snort}}}

        • Sienna. I like this name for some reason.

          Panza is a tank.

          • Tiffany de Houston

            Sienna actually is on my list.

          • It’s close. Still good.

            It’s a sign.

          • *Panzer.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            “Panzer” was the name of the tank division in the Nazi army. Not a good omen, if you ask me.

          • Much more appropriate for a cat

          • Yeah this is what I meant.

            Angela = smart

          • Angela Ruzzo

            Gracias! I can’t take much credit, as I had very smart parents. Luck of the draw, I guess.

          • My bad.

            I blame Hillary, why not?

          • Seems like Obama should carry some responsibility.

          • Agreed, Obama, my typo and everything else wrong with the world is partly your fault.

            Also partly Hillary’s.

            50/50

            Mmk

          • commatoes

            There is a band named Pansy Division.

          • Why am I not surprised.

            Now I’ve got to go check em out.

            Thanks commatoes 🙏

        • Angela Ruzzo

          I’ve never had a dog, but I’ve had lots of cats, and with cats I find it best to not give a name for 2 or 3 days until their personality reveals itself, and then the right name will be obvious.

          • Tiffany de Houston

            My cats are not gonna be happy but they’ll get over it.

          • Toomush_Inferesistance

            Some cats like to have dogs, for friends, or just to torment…

          • therblig

            ours would all have been named “get the fuck off the table”, “not my new sweater”, and “uh, thanks for the mouse”

          • Angela Ruzzo

            I had some like that. The one who wouldn’t get off the table became “Julius Caesar” (I Came, I Saw, I Conquered) and the one who liked mice was “Grimm” (as in Grimm’s Fairy Tales). The one that bit everyone was Attila.

          • Attila would be an awesome name for a rabbit.
            Cause then it would be Attila the Bun!

          • Angela Ruzzo

            Haha! Cute!

          • Back when I did Bloodhound rescue I had over a dozen dogs. They were all eventually called “Whateveryournameis.”

        • TJ Barke

          Not Blondie.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            xD

          • Pinkham’s Law

            Yeah, that’s a bad omen, right there.

          • mailman27

            Or Eva.

        • Count Awesome

          Name her Cambazola, just because it’s a cheesey name.

        • OrG

          When I was a kid we had a German Shepherd called Duchess.

        • Jukesgrrl

          Brunhilda if she’s witchy. Isolde if she’s young and beautiful.

        • Three Finger Salute

          Angela. Hard “G”. Frau Chancellor is tough but fair, and a dear friend to those who need it most.

          • CindyinEncinitas

            My German boyfriend pronounced it “On-GAY-luh.”

        • therblig
        • Anna Elizabeth

          Sigrid.

          • Get another dog and name her Foy?

          • Anna Elizabeth

            xD You just made me snort.

          • When next we get pets, it will be two kittehs together. And I shall name them Sigrid and Foy in thy honor.
            Because, reasons. :D

          • Anna Elizabeth

            xd ~hugs~

        • Ohhh Amalie is pretty *rumaging about in german scientist google*

        • CindyinEncinitas

          Schatze.

        • Diana, goddess of the hunt.

        • Toledo Window Box

          Schultzie.

        • Pinkham’s Law

          Schadenfreude?

          • ooo nother idea; twin pets named Shaden and Freude.
            Nice

        • Jonny On Maui

          Now.

          Here Now! Sit Now!

          I’ll be quiet…

        • WomanInThePersistence

          Liebchen.

          • commatoes

            Schatzi.

        • commatoes

          GS are often brown Brunhild?
          knew a Dutch girl named Hendrika or Riki.
          IIRC, Gertrude was a shield maiden in Norse mythology. Trudy?

        • disqus_lWwzrwNaw6

          Prudence and Evelyn strike me as good German shepherd names.

      • Count Awesome

        It’s always “Hitler” isn’t it?

        • Saaaayyyy you know who else named their German Shepherd????

      • altleftjohn

        How about Edeltraud?

      • eggs ackly-wright

        Blondi?

      • Scheißkopf?

        • WomanInThePersistence

          No. That’s kind of mean.

          • I once knew a lovable GIGANTIC St.Bernard that had that name and it fit him in a most adorable way. I agree, though, it would not ordinarily be a nice name for a dog.

    • TJ Barke

      Good luck. When they’re not neurotic messes, they’re genetic nightmares.

      • Panika MCD

        “mutts forever!” ~ CJ & JJP

        • Hybrid vigor!!

        • WomanInThePersistence

          Thor approves of this.

          • Panika MCD

            “will Thor be my boyfriend?” ~ JJP

      • This. ^^^^^

      • Tiffany de Houston

        The parents and grandparents are all OFA good or excellent.

      • I’ve known a few GS’s and while yes, they had some genetic health issues, none of em were neuritic that I recall. Good dogs actually.
        I wonder if the neurotic issues are not more training related?

        • The best books on dog behavior and training I’ve read is 3-volume set called “Handbook of Applied Dog Behavior and Training.”
          Nature usually has a greater influence on a dog’s character than nurture. I worked with a GSD rescue group years ago. Met many a neurotic dog (since it was a rescue).

          • That is what I mean though, are the neurotic ones abused or otherwise not trained well? I would assume at a rescue there would be many who were a bit not right in the head, because of that, but to me that would be more indicative of nurture.

          • Nurture definitely plays a part, but what I found so fascinating in those books I read is the in-depth research done on the neurophysiology behind behavior. Aggression can be bred into, or out of canines. Back in the late 70s Irish Setters experienced a boom in popularity so they were overbred wuth no regard to temperamental traits that are carried genetically. The breed became notoriously psycho. Same with cocker spaniels.

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        They just like order….

    • janecita

      I’m partial to Diablo, but is a she, so I have nothing.

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Yay new puppy! Pics are always good.

  • Jukesgrrl

    Today would have been my Dad’s 95th birthday. He did not GHOW, in fact he seemed to like wimmin for more than one reason. He said to me once after hearing Johnny Carson’s guest list, “I don’t like it when he has all men. Women are more interesting.” He’s been gone for more than a decade now and he STILL hasn’t sent me the winning lottery ticket he promised me. I’m beginning to doubt this heaven thing he sincerely believed in.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Aw, hugs, Jukesgrrl. Your dad sounds like he was an upstanding guy… lotto ticket notwithstanding ;-)

      • Jukesgrrl

        Thanks much.

    • May he Rest In Peace.

      I miss my great grandad, total criminal but the most interesting convict.

      • Now this sounds like a story

        • Oh yeah, one of the Irish bread criminals sent to Australia on the convict ships.

          Tough as nails, I imagine he would have had some colourful things to say about trump, dunno what he’d say about these freaky incel mgtows.

          I imagine he would likely use his fists, was good at that. Different time.

          Good storyteller tho, that’s what I remember most.

          • Sounds amazing. Do yourself a favor; write down every story he told you, even if you do not think you can write or whatever.
            Much too much history is lost because people think they cannot write well

          • That’s actually a good idea… is it a problem that I tend to wax lyrical when writing?

            I’d hate to have the stories uhmm tainted.

          • mailman27

            Don’t worry about the literary doo-dads. MBJ is totally right, these stories are irreplaceable. Hire an editor! (Or deal w/it it later.)

          • It is so decreed.

            I shall start tonight, if the moon is right. 🌑

    • janecita

      He isn’t allowed to give you the lotto numbers, it’s against Heaven’s rules.

      • Nuhuh, no rules in heaven, that’s why it’s heaven.

        • janecita

          No, no, you are thinking of hell. Heaven is all about following the rules, fluffing the clouds and talking smack about those bitchy angels.

  • Ryan Denniston

    “user name of “nofilmynofucky””

    Very Full Metal Jacket, that one.

    • Can we call him private pyle?

      • Three Finger Salute

        Bobby Goren libelz.

        • As in Private Pyle what is your major malfunction XD

          • Bemused Tralfamadorian

            Didn’t mommy and daddy show you enough attention when you were a child?

          • see? It totally works

      • Bemused Tralfamadorian

        Mebbe Raptor Man.

      • bluicebank

        Of course!

        “What is your major malfunction, numbnuts? Didn’t Mommy and Daddy show you enough attention when you were a child”

    • commatoes

      He should just shorten it to “nofucky”.

  • aktlib101

    In comments to an article claiming that some Repubs wish Dems would take the House in 2018 to save the country from Trump, a reader writes:
    https://www.rawstory.com/2017/10/ex-gop-lawmaker-republicans-are-hoping-democrats-take-house-in-2018-to-save-america-from-trump/?comments=disqus

    “proreviewer • 5 hours ago
    If you fucking cowards think you can just pretend Trump never existed like you did with Bush, you’ve got another thing coming. You voted for him, you mocked us for recognizing his unfitness for office and called us sore losers (because this is just a team sport to you guys), you tried to give him credit for Obama’s successes and pass off his failures on Obama. You put the entire world at risk of nuclear annihilation and re-energized white supremacy movements just so your team could be in power and because you were butthurt that a black man was president for 8 years. He’s yours. You own him.

    You won. GET OVER IT”

    • BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA nice

    • gallbladder

      BAM!

      • I so want that bumper sticker.
        “You won, get over it”
        lolz

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          They’re the world’s worst sore winners. My mom told me the other day that Trump is a secret Democrat. I was all like “bitch, Please! Your party has been building that monster for decades.”

          • You shoulda told her so XD I told my brother that this summer.
            He was muttering that he was a sekret dem and I laughed and said something like must be super smart to fool the entire GOP!

          • bluicebank

            I briefly thought there was a non-zero probability that Trump was a stalking horse candidate sent in by the Dems. Then I realized 1) the Dems ain’t that clever, but more importantly 2) that would have been an insanely stupid tactical mistake, then finally, 3) Trump is an asshole who is the embodiment of the GOP.

            Thus, not true that Trump was sent into to destroy the GOP. He sent himself in to destroy everything and everyone in sight.

            Now, had the rumor gone around that he was the Antichrist, I’d entertain the notion.

          • Is a rumor going around XD
            Half the evangelicals claim he is hand picked by God as the second coming of Jesus, the other half claim he is hand picked by God as the antichrist.

          • bluicebank

            They’re both wrong. He’s just a major asshole (among many other psychological disorders, the list of which bears not repeating.)

          • Riley Whodat Venable

            So Obama isn’t the AntiChrist any more? I’m glad that’s over.
            Current events are making me more convinced of a Post Tribulation Eschatology though.

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            I said 60 million Republican idiots voted for him, and he appointed Neil Gorsuch to the SC, so you guys own him.

          • Nice

          • (((fka_donnie_d))), SOB

            Well, he is. He was a registered Dem and donor long before he was a Repulican. That just makes it _much worse_.

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            He was a donor only because NY is controlled be Democrats. Jamie Simon is also allegedly a Democrat, yet I’ve never seen any evidence of that.

          • (((fka_donnie_d))), SOB

            It doesn’t fucking matter. The point is the Republican “party” has no principles beyond wealth and power for its’ own sake.

        • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III
        • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III
    • Raan

      They’re just sick of all the winning.

    • bluicebank

      I’m afraid I don’t have any relatives-friends/Trump voters left to post that to. Being as I washed them out of my hair months ago. Or, since I’m re-watching Battlestar Galactica, I done air-locked them into the gaping maw of space. Fucking Cylons.

      • I done air-locked them into the gaping maw of space. Fucking Cylons.

        This right here is word porn and I love it. You win the internet for today.

        • NorthernSaber

          I know! It’s genius- dig it: I just sang it to myself with a bit if a tangy voice, and damned if I didn’t hear either James McMurtry or Steve Earle. Potential hit here!

          • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

            McMurtry FTMFW!

    • Toledo Window Box

      And then in 2006, after 6 years of Bush’s incompetence and lies, we finally waved the Republicans out of Congress, as we are going to do next year.

    • Panika MCD

      I’m pretty sure most of them voted for McMullin. but they could fix this by changing how they choose the House Speaker. I’m not sure there’s a model for this in any of the state senates, but in some house/assembly chambers (including the TX House) the Speaker is chosen by a straight majority vote rather than between two candidates chosen by the major party caucuses. that allows for Dems and moderate Republicans (and, yes, they do exist and this is why you don’t see that so much) can band together to elect someone they actually have confidence in. it also allows committee chairs to be mostly based on qualifications and seniority so they can have D chairs when needed. and they can stop bullshit in its tracks by simply not referring it to committee or, if the author/sponsor is really being an asshole, they can refer it to a committee where it may or may not get a hearing, but definitely won’t get a vote.

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      The Hill comments section is a wild place. I’m glad comments still aren’t allowed her.

  • Bitter Scribe

    I’ll never understand* this obsession with women getting ahead in the workforce by “sucking dick” etc. I’ve been working for going on four decades, and I have known only two instances of women dating or having other sexual contact with male superiors. One of them called it off after one date and left the company shortly thereafter to pursue a successful career as a magazine writer. The other married the guy and dropped out of the workforce to bear his children.

    *Actually, yes I do. Losers always look for reasons besides their own incompetence to explain why someone else was promoted.

    • Sadly, women do this to other women also, too. They see someone promoted ahead of them and right a way it is “I wonder who she is sleeping with”
      This continues this day with the supposed more enlightened generation.
      We’ve still got a long way to go, baby

    • therblig

      america is such a prudish country, attacking someone with a sexual slur is always the go to. in my time in municipal government, it seems that the first attack on a politician or department director is always: s/he’s gay, s/he’s cheating on their spouse, s/he and h/h spouse have an open marriage, s/he (admittedly mostly she) got the job by fucking somebody, s/he swings both ways.

      as always though, goats are reserved for erick erickson (allegedly)

  • bluicebank

    If this song wasn’t posted before in regards to the subject of men in power forcing the female talent:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0OX_8YvFxA

    • Edith Prickly

      One of rock’s finest voices.

    • commatoes

      My teenage self alternated between, they are sooo hot and this is amazing music. Nancy Wilson rocks.

    • mailman27

      I saw this band opening for the Beach Boys (the first time the Boys ever had an opener, I think.) They totally blew me away, left the headliners in the dust IMHO. Didn’t hurt that I was a frisky 20-something, but they were a really outstanding band above and beyond my slack-jawed admiration.

      • bluicebank

        My heart was ever with Stevie Nicks, but Nancy Wilson and Joan Jett (and a resurrected Janis Jopin), and me, on a deserted island … you can believe I’ll fashion a microphone, speakers and amp out of coconuts if it’s the last thing I do.

  • The KGB Ate Our Votes

    “However, I also won’t choose to ignore that every time a woman gets a promotion or a raise from fellating her boss, someone else, probably someone harder working and more deserving, gets left out in the cold.”
    .
    Now I know why the guy doing the same job as I is making more than I am. He’s blowing the boss.

  • memzilla Ω

    In Wonkette-related news, Dear Shit Fer Brains might be about to get a lot more entertaining.
    . https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/8013143a8236c14221cfd60edfc27fa71ed837865a0163c01b8d4e7613ae90a7.jpg

    “Two members of the US House of Representatives today introduced a law bill that would allow hacking victims to seek revenge and hack the hackers who hacked them.

    “The Active Cyber Defense Certainty Act (ACDC) [PDF] amends the Computer Fraud and Abuse Act to make limited retaliatory strikes against cyber-miscreants legal in America for the first time. The bill would allow hacked organizations to venture outside their networks to identify an intruder and infiltrate their systems, destroy any data that had been stolen, and deploy “beaconing technology” to trace the physical location of the attacker.”

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Sounds like “Neuromancer”. ICE. Deckers.

      • That book was mad.

        Ok why not, AI wars, bring it on.

      • Bemused Tralfamadorian

        Gibson is a fraud. Neuromancer was written on a typewriter. He was, after its publication, purchased a computer by a friend. He remarked that he was unnerved by the whirring and grinding noises that it made, as he’d assumed that computers were like the spinning crystal type arrangements he described.

    • The bill would allow hacked organizations to venture outside their networks to identify an intruder and infiltrate their systems, destroy any data that had been stolen, and deploy “beaconing technology” to trace the physical location of the attacker.”

      So not individuals, but “organizations”
      Who could claim every whistleblower is a hacker. And claim they suspect this employee or that reporter of hackery.

    • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

      I read the article.

      Then, I spent a few minutes repeatedly bashing my head into a door frame. Now, I see double and my tinnitus came back in full force in my right ear.

      The more I think about this, the more I can’t even

      Fucking Morons!

      • memzilla Ω

        And once the precedent is established, it makes it all the more possible to launch a pre-emptive cyberattack. Did you notice the part where it said that this law only applies to domestic servers in the USA?

        Oops, I see your tinnitus has started in your left ear now. Sorry about that, Chief.

        • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

          Yup. What you said.

          The tinnitus is getting better after I started these two comfort cigars. Or one cigar. I can’t tell.

    • commatoes

      So the cyber version of Stand Your Ground.

      Yup, this will end well.

      • Three Finger Salute

        The Internet has literally become the Wild West.

        Even as the most powerful country in the West accelerates its decline.

  • sarafina

    These MGTOWs are truly disgusting. Robin, just how much do you drink?

    • Roni Raven, Undercovfefe Agent

      I don’t know how she does it. I can’t even bear to read her articles.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        I’ll admit, I usually just skim them. Assholes are behaving in an assholeish way. I really don’t need to know the details.

      • sarafina

        I understand.

    • Panika MCD

      I put bourbon in my coffee when I have a shitty hearing to cover down at the lege.

      • sarafina

        My personal favorite is Maker’s 46, do you have other suggestions?

        • Panika MCD

          I usually go with Bulleit. I don’t have a whole lot of disposable income. Maker’s is a little too oaky for my tastes. I want to go visit Still Austin now that it’s open. that was a super fun day in TX Sen Business & Commerce–partially because they also heard Watson’s TX Music Museum bill where Ray Benson was like, “I’m Ray Benson and you’re not–which is probably a good thing since you wouldn’t get elected.” (I so want him to run for lt. gov. now just to piss Dan Patrick off) and there was some music and a “thank you for not singing, Sen. Watson.”

  • Bub, the cynical zombie

    Just found out that a first cousin of mine, married, with two daughters, is dying of cancer. We are the same age, and I always enjoyed spending time with him when we were kids. Of course as we got older we didn’t see each other so much any more, although I attended his wedding 22 years ago. Now all I can think is how unfair it is, that I am single, with no dependents, while he leaves a wife and daughters, and I find myself wishing I could trade places with him. :-(

    • :snuggle: I understand your sentiment. On both accounts.

    • WomanInThePersistence

      I’m so sorry to hear this. What a sad thing.

    • Panika MCD

      I hope you find some time to spend with them.

      and if all else fails, the people you infected by eating their brains are all kind of your children.

    • commatoes

      The thoughts of a good person.

    • Sorry to hear Bub, spend time with him while you can. No regrets.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Sorry to hear that, Bub. It really is unfair, not that we want you to die but that he’s leaving behind a family. This song sometimes helps me get through when life throws cruel and unexpected curveballs and makes you ask questions that there really are no answers for.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-A6WH1kQLc

    • Alan

      It is never fair but you can always offer to help. Sometimes the offer alone is priceless.

    • Ms.MLG on Maui

      NOPE! I will be making a note of this comment, and pen a strong lecture full of f-bombs to deliver at you during our next phone conversation. You are every bit as important as anyone else!

  • ariel_gee_398

    Looks like the former real president forgot he’s supposed to lie about this: https://twitter.com/joshtpm/status/919358539273068544

    • TJ Barke

      Wouldn’t die, because it worked fine, so we had to poison it.

    • mailman27

      The less said about the “values” these shitbirds pretend to embrace, the better. What a pack of whores.

      • I realized yesterday that “Values” summit was actually a funny pun, for them

      • TJ Barke

        Live up to their un-achievable values, or be dumped into the gutter.

        • What values?
          The only thing they seem to cherish, value wise, is sexual “values”
          And those are dubious as any shrink will tell you.
          The rest of their shit is about as value-less as it gets

          • TJ Barke

            As a man: Be a xtian, be an authoritarian, controlling ass, have a high paying job.
            As a woman: Be a xtian, be whatever your husband tells you to be, fuck him on demand, but only when he wants it, raise your kids to fit these same archetypes, clean the house or tell the help to do so.

          • Bemused Tralfamadorian

            Values are about other people’s behaviour.

      • Pinkham’s Law

        No. the values they pretend to embrace would make us a much more civil society. The problem is, the values they *pretend* to embrace, are not the values they *actually* embrace.

    • therblig

      i’m sure every last fucking one of them cheered like it was moses with the commandments. especially the ones who live off the “love offerings” of those with sick and dying family members.

  • commatoes

    For Todd Starns and MGTOW

    https://youtu.be/UCv9hayPbw0

  • Raan

    I finally got around to fixing up the only real damage we had from Irma (we got off light; just the overhang on the back porch). We’re planning on re-doing it with vinyl lattice and planting vines to grow all along it.

  • (((Alt-Sedagive)))

    I was never much of an LCD Soundsystem fan, but their new album is an encyclopedia of late-’70s through early-’90s synth/indie/pop. It’s smart, adult, and you can dance to it:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqq3BtGrpU8

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    So the other day 35 people got busted for dealing meth and guns in Arkansas. Many are members of a white supremacist prison gang. I’m looking through their mugshots, and most were pretty typical – violent felon, meth addled goat fucker, skank tweaker, and then…black guy?

    I guess all is fair in war and meth dealing.

    • Gonna guess black guy was a gopher, courier, or customer. Can’t imaging a white supremacist prison gang actually employing one.

      • Marceline

        In high school had white friends who used to like going to the mall with me because it made it easier for them to shoplift. I suspect this might be something similar.

        • ….some friends

        • Pinkham’s Law

          White “friends,” you mean. And I’m approximately the color of printer paper. Except in July & August! I have a faaaaaaabulous tan, then!

    • Count Awesome

      Can you count all their teeth on one hand?

    • Carole

      Wait — they were busted for meth dealing IN THE PRISON? How did the smuggle the phenyl-2-propanone in there?

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        No, they were on the outside, they’re motto is “to the dirt” which means you’re a member until you die.

    • Carole

      But, because it’s Arkansas, all of the felons armed to the teeth (all 3 of them!) and the cops had a hard time bringing them in.

  • calliecallie

    Certainly Harvey Weinstein is a total piece of shit, and I’m glad for the bad things that are happening to him. But am I the only one who wonders “why now, after all these years, is this finally being acknowledged?” Something about it feels orchestrated to me. Maybe I have PTSD from too much Trump, but I guarantee he is not the only guy in Hollywood being such a harrassing asshole. So why him, why now?

    Also, I watch La La Land last night. Am I the only person in America who thinks that movie was total shit? The use of primary colors was nice, but for the rest of it, meh.

    • TJ Barke

      La La Land was totally just hollywood jerking itself off.

    • I think it is because someone was actually believed.
      And also, apparently, Frank Sinatra’s boy had this story a while back and the media decided not to bother running with it because reasons

    • Three Finger Salute

      Weinstein’s error was in going after Hollywood royalty — and practically every woman in the industry at that. I don’t doubt we’ll be hearing stories that he went after Betty White, Lassie, and Prairie Dawn from “Sesame Street”. Just like Trump, who went after Princess Diana, Maggie Trudeau and Carla Bruni he didn’t confine his perverted predilections to nobodies who had no connections and no recourse to fight back. As to why now, well… maybe it’s because of President Pussgrab that women really are saying they’re fed up and banding together to bigly smash the patriarchy wherever it “lies.”

      I’ll say again, though: the industry needs to be held 100% accountable and made to do penance and truth-and-reconciliation just like the Covfeferacy with the statues. Hold their cement-covered Gucci shoes to the fire and get them to denounce and blackball Woody Allen, Roman Polanski, Bryan Singer, Bill Cosby and so many others just like the Hollywood Ten were unfairly sacrificed so many years ago. Force the Weinstein brothers to divest of their studio and their intellectual property and turn it over to a United Artists type of organization that is run entirely by women. Remove his star from the Walk of Fame and the others too.

      I certainly have the fire in my belly to be an activist and a lot of ideas I’d like to see happen, but… not the social confidence to spout off (and I’m avoiding social media like the plague for numerous reasons) or anyone who’d really care. Suffice it to say, though, that there’s a lot more things that still need to be done, and this fight is not over.

    • Thiazin Red

      It was not good. Neither of the lead actors is good at singing or dancing, and both of their characters are completely insufferable. The one guy who tells Gosling’s character that its wrong to idolize innovators while trying to stifle innovation should have been the hero (his music was also shitty, but he had a lot of good points).

    • Manders

      The Weinstein Company has lost a lot of its shine. Leadership change was needed; that’s why HW went down now. My understanding is that his brother dimed on him, too.

    • Oh no. That movie was UTTER shite

  • Jonny On Maui

    Have you ever had the perfect shopping day? Yeah, I’m asking this as a guy and the answer isn’t, “Yes, when someone else does it.”

    The day started with hash 50% off at the local dispensary and got better from there.

    • TJ Barke

      I’ve not done hash before.

      • Jonny On Maui

        It’s come a long way from the dogshit stuff of old…

        • Pinkham’s Law

          The “shit” I had “of olde,” came not from a dog – believe me!

          • commatoes

            Have you been watching Cheech and Chong movies again?

          • Pinkham’s Law

            Why would I be watching them, when I already *lived* them?

          • commatoes

            I remember a sequence where Tommy Chong’s dog ate his stash. So he had to follow the dog around for two days with a bag.

          • Pinkham’s Law

            And, your point is . . . .????

          • commatoes

            Uh, literally dogshit.

      • Jennifer R

        What are you waiting for hon?

        • TJ Barke

          Dunno. Probably don’t have the right equipment.

          • Jennifer R

            I mean, you can put it in a joint even. But any sort of dry hash, especially a dry crumble hash can go in a pipe, bong, or vape.

          • TJ Barke

            Huh. It’ll probably ruin me though.

          • Jennifer R

            I usually put like 1/3rd the usual amount of weed in, then a little measure of hash and it’s a mighty fine bowl.

          • Toomush_Inferesistance

            Um, TJ? I’ve been reading your noncomments for a while now. I’m pretty sure you’re already ruint….

          • TJ Barke

            Different kind of ruined.

          • Toomush_Inferesistance

            I kinda had to not do hash when I was in strange places. I get a little claustro indoors and have to go outside, walk around………then I get lost, and spend the next several hours trying to figure out where I am…

          • Juan de Fuca

            I’ve smoked it on an empty Coke can way back in my younger days. But I was a poor back then. Poked a few holes on top of the can and voilà.