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Hey, Wonketariat! Do yourself a favor and have some bonus nice time puppies and baby goats before reading all the newses we might be talking about today.

Tom Petty died last night — but for real this time. Wonkette is sad.

Trump’s White House doesn’t think it’s a “good time” to talk about gun control right now, so they’re trying to pivot to problems inChicago, and Puerto Rico — literally anything else that isn’t about the shooting in Las Vegas.

Here’s a quick list of bullshit hoaxes and fake news nonsense about the Las Vegas shooting. (And DEFINITELY don’t get your news from Facebook or Google, Jesus Christ.)

In the wake of the shooting in Las Vegas, the NRA has decided to delay a massive ad buy in Virginia’s state elections, and gone effectively dark so as not to offend gun fetishists potential voters.

Here’s a handy infographic to help you find out out which Congress critters have been accepting NRA blood money. You’re welcome.

Bill O’Reilly thinks that the Las Vegas shooting is “the price of freedom.” Just so we’re clear, the price of freedom is 59 dead, and over 500 wounded. God bless America.

Prince Jared and Ivanka had not one, not two, but THREE private email address they were using to conduct government business. NO WONDER they forgot to tell anyone about their emails, there’s just so many!

Guess what? Trump had some MOAR business with Russia, and so did his smarmy lawyer, Michael Cohen. Surprised?

The Senate Judiciary Committee has been denied some Trump-Russia stuff by the CIA even though the Senate Intel Committee has already seen the same damn things.

Facebook is admitting that as many as 10 million people saw Russian ads in their newsfeeds because it was just so fucking cheap to bombard Middle America with pro-Trump Russian propaganda.

Scott Pruitt has been giving big, sloppy and expensive blowjobs to corporate America and conservative lobbying groups that were left to die under the Obama administration.

While we were busy wondering what to do about guns (again), the Children’s Health Insurance Program was allowed to lapse by a Republican congress who loves to bitch about the children.

The Supreme Court is set to to hear a bevy of new cases including gerrymandering, and the warrantless searching of cellphones, gay-hatin’ bakers, American tech companies hiding shit in Not America, and much much more!

Some ladies are pissed at the Trump administration for killing an Obama-era equal pay rule, so they’re preparing to sue the shit out of him, just like his ex-wives.

Cost projections for the round-the-clock protection of Betsy DeVos are expected to top out at $6.54 million now that a contract with the US Marshall Service for protective services has been renewed — but at least she’s footing the bill to fly them around on her private jet.

The CIA might be pissed at Chelsea Manning, but she gives absolutely zero fucks about the feefees of a butthurt police state.

Mike Pompeo’s dumbass replacement, Rep. Ron Estes, let a shadowy Ukrainian lobbying group hold a bogus hearing on corruption in the basement of the Capitol.

Trump LURVS being thought of as the “crazy guy,” it’s just good for ratings, or whatever.

The quickest way to be “You’re Fired” in Trump’s White House is to block whatever teevee is blasting Fox News as it has become the de facto source for Trump’s Twitter tantrums.

Ryan Zinke is being investigated by the Interior Department for being a grifty bastard and screwing taxpayers just so he can skip around fly-over country on private jets owned by oil-and-gas lobbyists.

It’s not just mean words and sanctions, the US has been engaged in “cyber war” with North Korea for a while now, so the Russians set up a backup Internet for Dear Leader to rub one out.

In another unsurprising maneuver, the Senate confirmed Ajit Pai to another five year term as chair of the FCC with Republicans praising his tireless efforts to con broke people in the middle of nowhere with bullshit 5G Internet access, and his gutting of net neutrality.

OK, Google, we’re only going to tell you this once – 4Chan is not a credible news source. Get your shit together because you can’t keep fucking up breaking news stories.

If you’ve got a couple million dollars laying you could buy Gawker, but most people seem to think it’s too much of a toxic waste dump. [h/t WSJ]

Pat Robertson talked to Jeebus, and Jeebus told Pat Robertson that “violence in the streets” wouldn’t be happening if we stopped disrespecting authority.

Milo Yian-whatever ALLEGEDLY married a guy, and we don’t give a fuck. Consider yourself informed.

SCOTUS has told Kim Dotcom to fuck off back to New Zealand and stop complaining about the seizure of assets he acquired by charging people to store stolen data, porn and movies on his now dead website.

And here’s your late night wrap-up! NOTE: It is sad, serious, and not at all funny, but you should watch it anyway; Stephen Colbert thinks we have to do SOMETHING; Jimmy Kimmel called out all the Senators who go out of their way to object to gun control; Seth Meyers took A Closer Look at Trump talking about Puerto Rico; Conan O’Brien is fucking sick of this shitThe Daily Show wondered when the hell it’s time to talk about guns.

And here’s your morning Nice Time!

Help us keep resisting with your Ameros! Use the clicky!

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  • Nounverb911
    • grindstone

      That….that is a thing of evil. (Hey, I like these today since they could be used for we heathen tea drinkers instead of the coffee fiends.)

      • wide_stance_hubby

        Tea too hot to handle, tea too hot to drink.

        • grindstone

          Well, in that cup, yeah!

    • MynameisBlarney
    • Msgr_MΩment

      Just fill the outside of my cup and I’ll be fine. Thanks.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      In the ’90s, MOMA would have paid $120,000 for that and put it on a pedestal.

    • Rocket Pony Ron

      Topologically it’s still a coffee cup. I don’t see the problem.

  • Nounverb911
    • John Thorstensen

      Via lactea!

    • The Wanderer

      You spin me right round baby right round . . .

      • Bobathonic

        Like a record baby.

        • wide_stance_hubby

          Right round, round, round.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      This whole “latte art” thing is getting out of hand.

  • Nounverb911
    • Courser_Resistance

      Should be The Scream

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    The morning after Orlando shooting Little Babby Donnie was not mourning…
    https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/742034549232766976

  • ManchuCandidate

    Price of freedom?
    Only a major asshole, dick less, callous, psycho… Oh right it’s O’Really. Carry on.

    • Gayer Than Thou

      I already thought that maybe O’Reilly himself was too high a price to pay for freedom.

      • wide_stance_hubby

        BOR < ROI.

  • Nounverb911
  • Bub, the cynical zombie
    • MynameisBlarney

      He uses words that he clearly does not understand what they really mean.

      • Gayer Than Thou

        Pretty certain he thinks the Las Vegas PD works for him somehow.

        • wide_stance_hubby

          He thinks the entire nation works for him.

      • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

        AOTK

      • therblig

        plagues of egypt
        parting the red sea
        loaves and fishes
        71 minutes to find shooter
        resurrection of jesus
        2 x every saint

        i’m convinced.

    • BigCSouthside

      59 people were slaughtered and it could have been fucking prevented if you and your piece of shit evil Party didn’t have the big blued steel cock of the NRA up your ass for a fucking generation.

      Some fucking miracle.

    • therblig

      yes, the miracle of smoke alarms.

    • btwbfdimho

      Reach shooter, or the body of the shooter?

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        The latter. Guy offed himself rather than continue shooting, for who-knows-but-thank-FSM-what reason.

        • cmd resistor

          I read in one story, I think Boston Globe, that the guy shot through the door and hit a security guard in the leg. That’s the only place I saw it, though. No matter what kind of job they did, though, Trump had nothing to do with it.

  • Gee, Your Hair Smells Horrific

    Um, I liked the first Tom Petty correction better.

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    Pat Robertson talked to Jeebus, and Jeebus told Pat Robertson that “violence in the streets” wouldn’t be happening if we stopped disrespecting authority.

    Back when that colored fella was in charge, calamities were all caused by gay marriage. When’s he coming back anyway?

  • JohnBull

    Wouldn’t it be nice if Bill-O were to leave the US once in a while and see how other countries can somehow manage to have both safety, freedom, and prosperity? Like dozens of them. Imagine a country you don’t have to worry about getting shot, see your paycheck go UP every year AND not getting a criminal record for having a drink when you’re 18!

    • Nounverb911

      Isn’t he on the ‘No-Fly’ list?

    • YoBunnyBunny

      But all of those countries are overrun by the ISLAMIC HOARDS!!!!1!!1! And they are WEAK!!1!!

    • Rocket Pony Ron

      He could leave the US, this is true, but I doubt he’s able to see anything that conflicts with his Deeply Held Beliefs.

  • Left Coast Tom

    Facebook is admitting that as many as 10 million people saw Russian ads in their newsfeeds because it was just so fucking cheap to bombard Middle America with pro-Trump Russian propaganda.

    It’d be nice if “Middle America” would stop clicking “share” on Russian propaganda.

  • MynameisBlarney

    Here’s a “get your minds on something else, because everything fucking sucks right now” meme dump.

    https://imgur.com/gallery/DXqt4

    http://cheezburger.com/3576581/monday-evening-meme-report

  • armed_bears

    I refuse to believe Milo can commit emotionally to anyone other than himself. Self marriage is my guess.

    • wide_stance_hubby

      He can commit emotionally to someone’s else’s money, though.

      • shastakoala

        Probably didn’t even have the wedding cake we like.

        • wide_stance_hubby

          And Wonkette won’t cover his wedding in a post, either (tee hee).

        • Celtic_Gnome

          I imagine a lot of progressive bakers would refuse to bake his cake.

          That sounded way dirtier than I intended.

    • Dudleydidwrong

      Maybe he’s finally figured out how to do what we’ve suggested for a long time: fuck himself.

  • M.E. Lawrence

    “Bill O’Reilly thinks that the Las Vegas shooting is ‘the price of freedom.'” M.E. Lawrence thinks the same could be said of Bill O’Reilly.

  • ManchuCandidate

    Investigator: Sir you are under investigation for conflict of interest involving use of lobbyist airplanes.
    Zinke: Surely you can’t be serious.
    Investigator: I am serious. And don’t call me Shirley.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Are you suggesting that giving a “motivational speech” to a hockey team owned by a zillionaire that you’re supposedly regulating, followed by a flight to your personal ranch, is not “government business”?

    • Pilotshark

      Oh then there is this little thing of you threating a US Senator from Alaska.

      and you picked the wrong time to stop sniffing glue.

  • Left Coast Tom

    According to this High Country News post one is 2.5 times more likely to die from a bullet in Alaska versus California (19.8 per 100K vs 7.7). Gun laws are somewhat different in the two states.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      STOP BEING DIVISIVE!!111!!!!

    • MynameisBlarney

      Y U HATE ‘MERKA!?!?!

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Nobody in CA will mistake you for a moose. That’s the difference.

    • Historicat

      There’s a Palin joke in there somewhere, I just can’t find it.

    • MrTusks

      How many of those Alaskan bullets are self-inflicted, intentionally or otherwise?

  • Nounverb911
    • bupkus231

      This fuckin’ tweet bothers me. Boehlert’s assertion about the LV police sounds like bullshit to me. Anybody have any corroboration from any other source?

      This report from NC News appears to contradict Boehlert’s assertion:

      Link: https://www.nbcnews.com/card/it-took-police-72-minutes-first-911-call-breach-paddock-n806836

      nut, who the fuck knows. I just hate that, even in attempting to criticize Rump, people put out bullshit as “fact”….

  • Guns don’t kill people.

    Flawed thinking about guns kills people.
    http://gunvictimsaction.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/06/nra-mental-300×200.jpg

  • The Wanderer

    Ah. Here I am, at work, wearing pants, and unable to drink certain substances of an ethanol-bearing nature. I cannot really get into the news today, so I shall sneak-watch the MST3K parody of Gamera (“Gamera! Get the camera!”) while doing my reports and such.

    • Ω cynmac’s reclaiming her time

      Good choice.

      • The Wanderer

        It’s a proven winner.

    • Rocket Pony Ron

      Gamera is really neat!
      Gamera is full of meat!
      We all love you Gamera!

  • Mavenmaven

    The latest BS story circulating was that an ISIS terrorist killed Paddock, shot up the concert, and then managed to get away. Anything to change the subject from gun control.

    • Nounverb911

      Lord Grantham’s dead dog does get around a lot.

    • MynameisBlarney

      That is spectacularly ridiculous.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      You’d need an IQ somewhat below room temperature to believe that sort of horseshit. Like, say, a not-so-Breitbart reader.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        Unfortunately, it’s less about IQ than it is about confirming one’s pre-existing worldview. If you don’t want to believe that white male gun ownership leads to these sorts of tragedies, then you find a way to believe something else.

    • Claire

      I have a theory that having no empathy makes people able to spout the most blindingly stupid nonsense without ever triggering that deep sense of embarrassment that would make most of us unable to finish writing the same assertion even as snark. I haven’t quite figured out the mechanism yet, but I feel like it’s there, like some people just never feel second-hand embarrassment either.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      This little gem was being propagated by Charlie fucking Daniels, the same tubby genius who made a big splash of his boycott of Thursday night football…on Wednesday night.

    • Rocket Pony Ron

      Wow. That is Alex Jones-level insane.

    • cmd resistor

      Crazy aunt’s FB feed produced a few gems this morning. One was that the guy was a result of a government mind control experiment. The other was a basic hymn to Trump and all the wonderful things God helped him do, mostly against the gheys.

    • kaydenpat

      No one takes these BS stories seriously.

      • Mavenmaven

        I seriously need to delete those who do from my FB page.

  • Nounverb911
  • Michael Smith

    Its funny how Republicans deem 59 dead and 400 wounded an acceptable price to pay for the freedom of gun owners, but so many other sacrifices, which you’d think are less significant, are completely unacceptable.

    For instance, the hurt feelings of Christianist bakers are too high a price to pay for the freedom of individuals to choose their sexual partner. Children having to learn prayers at home from their parents rather than from the public school is too high a price to pay for religious freedom. Self righteous white people being forced to look for a few seconds at black people expressing their feeling that the promises of this country aren’t being met is too high a price to pay for freedom of speech.

    But all those people having to die so that gun owners can feel safe from government meddling into their gun collection? Or so that gun dealers can be confident that they’ll stay financially afloat for years to come? That’s an acceptable price to pay for freedom.

    • BigCSouthside

      The same people that say gun control doesn’t work say that you must take your shoes off at the fucking airport

      • YoBunnyBunny

        And the same people who say gun control doesn’t work also say the “War on Drugs” is a smashing success.

    • ManchuCandidate

      Also the same folks who scream coastal eelights aren’t REAL US Amercians but support traitor flags, buy into Russian agitprop, don’t see a problem with Russia messing with the US Amercia election, and have no problem with letting their own die to greed and neglect. So who really loves US Amercia?

    • kaydenpat

      But to be fair to Republicans, they have made their stance on guns clear and yet the American people keep voting them into office.
      When will the American people decide that it is wrong to put gun rights over the safety and wellbeing of human beings?
      When will the American people stop putting politicians into office who fine with the slaughter of hundreds of American people to satisfy the gun lobby?
      When do we stop voting for NRA-controlled lunatics?

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        It’s more important to make it hard for trans people to take a piss. They’ll vote on that basis, never mind that the candidate’s pockets are full of NRA blood money.

      • Michael Smith

        I’m afraid a pretty chunk of the American people agree with those Republican leaders.

  • janecita

    I’m glad that I have three classes today to keep me busy! I don’t want to think about all the fucked up shit going on in this country. See you guys later:-)

    • Dudleydidwrong

      Study hard. Learn well. Share your knowledge–we need it.

      • janecita

        I’m a Health Educator, I’m the one teaching the classes:-) Today, I taught two at a rehab center, and one at a women’s shelter. I like going to the shelter because I get to play with the kids. I usually bring them toys, so they all love me. It a win win situation, the ladies learn, and I get to hold babies:-)

  • Gayer Than Thou

    Suellen O’Hara, after learning that Scarlett will marry Suellen’s fiance and Suellen is likely to be an old maid.

    Also me, learning that Milo Yawn-what’s-his-name is married and I’m not. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/69646154deb7915c840dfeaa912e1c1a5332c3142df61423884bfea159aeae7c.jpg

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Milo is married?? To what?

      • Jamoche

        A mirror to reflect his ego.

      • Rocket Pony Ron

        His ego.

      • shastakoala

        His highlights.

    • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

      Don’t worry. He married that sad sack Ashley.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    What says “unity” more than a puppy and a baby goat sharing a bottle of milk?

  • btwbfdimho

    “Trump’s White House doesn’t think it’s a “good time” to talk about gun control right now,”

    Meanwhile, after a bombing in London, President Trump on Friday advocated for a “larger, tougher and more specific” travel ban in response to a bomb explosion in London’s subway system.

    Sounds like the Muslim lobby is not as strong as the guns lobby…

    Make Armerica Great Again!

    http://thehill.com/homenews/administration/350802-trump-calls-for-larger-tougher-travel-ban-in-response-to-london

    • kaydenpat

      It will never be a good time to talk about gun control for Wingnuts. Never.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      It’s always a good time to talk about scary Mooselimbs.

  • Nounverb911

    Donald trump being impeached would be salubrious to the world.

    https://twitter.com/MerriamWebster/status/915184978975182848

    • kaydenpat

      If Republicans are voted out of office en masse next November, that would be salubrious to the world. Yes we can!

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    Is it my imagination, or is 99% of fake news coming from right-wing nutbags and Pootie Puppets?

    • Gayer Than Thou

      There was that story about how liberals are too smart to fall for fake news, but I was never completely certain that wasn’t itself fake news.

      • Duke

        “You’re too smart to fall for it” is a theme in all successful propaganda.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Don’t Come Around Here No More.

    You may not know this, but Trump is a big Tom Petty fan. Well, the bit about not backing down. Or standing his ground.

    • ManchuCandidate

      He always free falling into a pile of shit.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Wait. It’s not free balling?

    • kaydenpat

      But I doubt Petty was a big Trump fan.

  • Nounverb911
  • Shalimar

    Milo’s “wedding” sounds like another of his attention-seeking publicity stunts. Does he even have a marriage certificate filed?

    • Skwerl the Nazi Puncher

      It would be easy to find out.

    • wide_stance_hubby

      My guess is the court will refuse to issue one, because his own reflection cannot sign the papers.

      • Shalimar

        No kidding. Milo has frequently referred to himself as a whore, and coincidentally his “husband” is named John. There is something very performance-arty about that.

        • Rocket Pony Ron

          If this is performance art I’ll go back to watching mimes, TYVM.

  • Skwerl the Nazi Puncher

    Bill O’Reilly thinks that the Las Vegas shooting is “the price of freedom.”

    Funny how you say this, have you paid this price? Will you go tell the people who lost their loved ones how their loss is the price of freedom and is no big deal?

    Of course not, you fucking coward.

    • JohnBull

      He wrote a book about people getting killed. Close enough for his viewers.

      • Martini Ambassador 🍸

        Lying about being in a dangerous situation is practically the same as being in harm’s way, right?

    • Finnibar87

      Sure seems like BOR is paying the price with OPM.

      • bupkus231

        Gee – I’m too hung up on the wrong acronyms. I first thought you were referring to “Office of Personnel Management”…..

    • BigCSouthside

      I feel like these so called patriot bastards don’t understand the fucking idea of American freedom.

      You just have to read the fucking preamble
      Insurance of domestic tranquility
      Provide for the common defense
      Promote the general welfare

      All come BEFORE “secure the blessings of liberty” because the founders knew that liberty is contingent on the first three. American freedom requires responsibility. It’s not just an idea that says “fuck yeah I can do whatever I want cuz I’m a free american!”

      When your freedoms breach the domestic tranquility, common defense, and general welfare of citizens, they are enemies of the state.

    • kaydenpat

      I suppose Bill O’ would change his mind if it was one of his family members or close friends who paid this “price of freedom” so gun owners can go about unfettered. He is a true conservative. Not an ounce of empathy.

      • bupkus231

        Hell, no – I really doubt that. Bill O could get his own ass shot up, and if it didn’t kill him, he’d still be pushing his shithead ideas. He appears incapable of understanding ( no matter how he wants to be seen as an intellectual historical author ). Of course, if it killed him, we might get a little peace….

  • MynameisBlarney
    • wide_stance_hubby

      Just say ‘no’ to the ‘All Parties Matter’ candidate.

    • (((Alt-Sedagive)))

      Better than Kid Rock, but that’s not saying much.

    • Serai 1

      Who?

    • SeeTrain65

      Chumbawamba/The Proclaimers 2020!

      The one-hit wonder ticket!

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    The price of Murican freedom, as per Bill O’Shitthefuckupyoujackass is a bunch of dead people. Weird that other democratic countries are doing just fine without paying the cost. Maybe Murica isn’t as enlightened as Bill thinks it is.

    • Finnibar87

      I think freedom works way better when one is, you know, living.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      I wonder if his ex-wife thinks being beaten and abused is also the cost of freedom?

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    If anyone’s wondering how this dickhead managed to amass a gigantic arsenal without anyone noticing or caring, Rachel pointed out that Vegas has a huge gun show almost every weekend, where this kind of the thing is a feature not a bug. If you can’t find a licensed gun dealer skeevy enough to look the other way, gun shows exist specifically to encourage the kind of mentality. Sorry…it know now is not the time to talk about it…

    • Duke

      You realize there’s like 1,000,000 more small-fingered braggarts who can’t wait to add another fancy killing machine to their arsenal.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        All those good guys with guns. It makes me feel so much safer in public.

    • cmd resistor

      Plus I read one estimate he probably built up that arsenal over a year period — based on his brother saying he only had a few handguns a year ago (of course that could be wrong) but if you buy a few here and there you won’t attract any attention because once they do your background check it gets destroyed because freedom so there’s no real record you are stocking up an arsenal.

      • Persistent Tennessee Rain

        Knowing who the fuck has what weapons should most definitely fall under the category of “well regulated” – Jesus Hussein Christ, but am I in a rage today.

        • cmd resistor

          But you can’t. Because it would be “registration.” And it says right there in the 2nd Amendment, NO REGISTRATION.

      • Serai 1

        So background checks get destroyed, but DACA records get plumbed for info so the American Gestapo can drag people out of the country by their hair.

        Yeah, what was that about freedom, again?

    • Ωbjectifier

      I once got escorted out of Harrahs in Laughlin cuz a bellman saw a joint in my room. How the hell did this guy get an armory up to 32?

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        You were obviously a much greater threat to society than a heavily armed lunatic.

      • From Russia with Love

        You can’t smell an AR-15 in a hotel room.

        Well, you can after it’s fired a thousand rounds or so.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Nevada is open carry. He could have slung ’em over his shoulder and walked right in.

    • Sunhead

      If anyone’s wondering how this dickhead managed to amass a gigantic arsenal without anyone noticing or caring

      Nope.
      It was basically inevitable.
      It will happen again.
      Until the 2nd amendment is removed you are now living in a warzone.

  • MynameisBlarney
    • pstokk

      I do that, considering whether I should dive into cold water.
      I spend a lot of time contemplating the alternate universes where I did/didn’t dive just this second, or will/won’t just the next second.
      Beats diving into the fucking freezing water.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Go with the quantum superposition – on average, it’s only half as cold.

        • pstokk

          But I could never know that.

    • Serai 1

      I remember those drawings. I first saw them in an encyclopedia entry on schizophrenia. They’re part of a series of paintings done by a patient who was descending into “madness”. It terrified me as a kid, because you could literally see the deterioration of the mind through the paintings.

      • MynameisBlarney

        I remember seeing them in biology class.
        I thought they were drawn by someone on acid as part of an experiment…
        Musta remembered wrong.

        • Serai 1

          I’m not sure about that last one. I don’t think it was part of the schizophrenia set. It could well have been drawn on acid. But those first three I remember very well, especially the second one. That one’s where the series got really frightening.

  • Rocket Pony Ron

    If today is STARTING with puppies and baby goats, I think I’ll go back to working on the deck.

  • (((Alt-Sedagive)))

    I spent a lot of time overseas as a kid: on army bases, shuttling between Western European nations (before the EU – I am an oldish).

    I got to see America from the outside, and I liked what I saw. Sure, we were kinda nuts, but we still had an aura of bravery, and a willingness to take risks. We were the Wild West in the awkward years, where anyone could be anything if they worked hard enough. And we were a recent WWII Ally – a wild teenager of a country with a bright future if we could just learn to tame our rampant racism. We were fucking rock ‘n roll, and our hearts were in the right place.

    That wild teenager of a country has become a meth-addicted, heavily-armed psychotic shut-in. America is off its meds, has soiled itself, is armed and dangerous, and will cut a bitch if you look at it funny. We’re scared, stupid and violent, and we don’t want anyone’s help. We believe in angels, but dead kids are just the price we pay for the freedom to continue hallucinating.

    Holy crap.

    • Daniel

      You believe in angels, and dead kids are how you get them.

    • Finnibar87

      Welcome the America’s Era of Stupid.

      • (((Alt-Sedagive)))

        We’ve passed stupid.

        We are psychotic – a danger to ourselves and others.

    • Bub, the cynical zombie
      • wide_stance_hubby

        JFC, he looks about 12!

        • cmd resistor

          I remember before I liked Obama I figured out that I secretly resented him because he was younger than I was.

          • wide_stance_hubby

            The only saving grace is that you can only discover you are older than the president once. After that, it’s mind over matter.

          • Historicat

            Today we are all older than the president, at least emotionally.

          • wide_stance_hubby

            True dis.

          • cmd resistor

            It was only a couple of years, but he looked much younger, back then. Of course once he aged with the office, it was all ok.

    • Marceline

      It’s the end of the American empire. These are just the death throes.

      • Courser_Resistance

        I’ve lived long enough to see countries that were modern, more or less open societies fall into chaos. Iran, Iraq, the Balkan states. Sarajevo hosted the Olympics for fucks sake. Now they are now backward, wartorn hellholes. I watched them fall.

        It’s now happening here. People don’t think it can happen, but it’s happening right now. It’s sectarian violence on a massive scale. White men are killing everyone ‘not them’. Women of all races and minorities. Toxic White Man Syndrome is the cause and it’s going to win. Russia has built the momentum for years and it’s now in full force. They’ve had ONE MISSION since before the Cold War. Destroy the United States. And they’re doing it. They’ve installed their Puppet Regime and are now feeding us poison through our social media.

        American is already dead – we just don’t know it yet.

        • (((Alt-Sedagive)))

          I agree. Absolutely. That toxic masculinity really does look like it’s going to win.

          What an unspeakable tragedy.

        • Daniel

          Just speaking up on behalf of the Balkan states- they’re not backwards, worn torn hell holes.

          Croatia and Slovenia are both in the EU and doing pretty well, Serbia is not doing as well but is trying so that it too can be admitted to the EU, Bosna is suffering, as always, through corruption and poverty but to call it “war torn” and “backwards” is frankly insulting, Kosovo is in a similar situation, which is hardly surprising given what happened there as recently as a decade ago. I think Montenegro is taking off as a tourist destination, and Macedonia… well, I’m not actually sure about that one.

          • Courser_Resistance

            My deepest apologies, Daniel and I stand corrected. They *have* made a ton of progress and I neglected to remember or note that. Or even research it.

            My bad.

    • Courser_Resistance

      Well said. Thank you. I remember those times as well. I think we had better perspective on the world and our place in it, in those days.

      • (((Alt-Sedagive)))

        We were adults in those days.

        It all came crashing down in the ’80s.

    • Rocket Pony Ron

      Well-put. As someone from also Not America who is looking at middle age in the rear-view mirror, I think you’ve called it pretty well. The America that was once proud to put two men on the Moon is now proud to put a missile in a mailbox. It’s awful watching someone go mad and not being able to do anything about it.

      • (((Alt-Sedagive)))

        Thank you for the sympathy.

        It’s even worse to be locked in the same room with the killer, trying to reason with him, and hoping against hope that he’ll come to his senses.

        • Alexander Stallwitz

          America has devolved from being a cowboy into a “Come me at me , Bro!” Fratdouche.

    • From Russia with Love

      Yeah, well I wasted 35 years working on that fucking project. I’ll be just fine if I never set foot in America again. What a fucking sham. 500+ citizens gunned down by a nutbag and they don’t want to fucking talk about it? Fuck that shit.

      • (((Alt-Sedagive)))

        I hear you.

        But hey: we’ll always have Paris.

    • Donna Mueller

      this!!!!!!! i grew up in that country and was so proud to be an american. my heart aches and my eyes are filled with tears. i HATE the republicans with every fiber of my being!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      • (((Alt-Sedagive)))

        Hate is never constructive but holy mother – they’re killing everything I love about this country, and they’re taking aim at the rest of the planet.

        Hoping for a miracle, and working for a solution.

        • Serai 1

          Oh, hate can be constructive if you know how to focus it.

  • Bill D. Burger

    He’ll be there with Mel in her hurricane shoes for about 35 minutes Puerto Rico to meet with the people affected.
    Better get out the ass-kissing manuals. He’s gonna’ require a lot of it.

    https://twitter.com/ddale8/status/915037922029637632

    • Duke

      Well… Those 35 minutes will be very, very difficult for him. I mean, who can spend 35 minutes straight turning the topic from some strangers whining back to your ratings?

      I certainly would find it trying. I’d need a coffee and a neck massage immediately afterwards. And heaps of praise for everything I did.

      • YoBunnyBunny

        Pfft. He’ll spend 35 minutes talking about that tremendous golf trophy he dedicated to them. And his crowds? Did you see the crowds at his inauguration? People are saying…

    • Finnibar87

      That’s about as long as the idiot Trump spent meeting his Creepy Girl’s parents in Slovenia.

      Donnie bragged about it to Howard Stern.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      30 of the 35 will be photo-ops of Il Douche handing a case of bottled water to an embarassed relief worker.
      WH in deep discussions re whether the worker should be brown, which might suggest local non-laziness.

      • Phoenixdoglover

        I have a dream.

        The selected person, who will receive the case of bottled water handed to him by Hair Furor, will give Drumpf a nice fat middle finger, and suitably wait for the media to capture the gesture for posterity.

        Because he deserves it, and somebody has to do it.

    • Donna Mueller

      he’ll be there as long as it takes to unload a planefull of play-doh.

    • SeeTrain65

      “Trump’s interactions with Puerto Ricans impacted by Maria are scheduled for 35 minutes.”

      Which then will be abruptly cancelled when any one of them tells them he’s doing a bad job.

  • btwbfdimho
    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Nah, it’ll make the left laugh their asses off that you can’t spell “their”.

    • therblig

      was the discussion about spelling? or your respective failures to secure and keep jobs in trumpy’s white house?

    • YoBunnyBunny

      Bitch, please. Ain’t nobody thinking about you or your “private” conversations. You are a basic-bitch common Heather.

    • Finnibar87

      Troll Bannon looks like he smells really bad.

    • Kiri the Unicorn

      There’s gotta be something seriously wrong with anyone who describes meeting Steve Bannon as a “pleasure”.

      • Daniel

        I understand that dipping your toes in his face pouches feels rather pleasantly like taking a gentle stroll across a beach strewn with dead cephalopods. Of course, there’s seagulls, but that’s probably why he’s wearing that hat.

      • From Russia with Love

        Maybe he didn’t barf on the desk this time.

        • Daniel

          Well he did, but this time he was polite and offered his guest the chance to eat it first.

    • Daniel

      And not a single one of them will ever look at this tweet with a sense of embarrassment.

    • kaydenpat

      Can he not spell “their”? And no one cares about your private discussion with Steve, the Red Nosed Drunk Deer.

      • From Russia with Love

        Spell check. How do it work and shit?

    • BigCSouthside

      Hey dickhead, real cowboys take off their fucking hat inside buildings

    • From Russia with Love

      Nah, nobody gives a flying fuck about you or your two fugly friends.

    • Bub, the cynical zombie

      “Talked about effective remedies for hemorrhoids, the softest toilet tissues on the market, and the wonders of a good bidet. You know…asshole stuff.”

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      Who are these people again?

      • Serai 1

        A slime toad, a GOPper bint, and an Uncle Tom.

    • Donna Mueller

      not at all, doofus- when they’re done using you, they’ll pretend you don’t even exist anymore, but YOU are to painfully STOOOOOOOOPID to figure it out. i’ll be here to laugh at you when that happens. FU

    • Serai 1
    • SeeTrain65

      So you both talked about blowing yourselves. Big fucking deal.

  • Bill D. Burger

    He’s proud that one man was able to kill 60 and maim 500+ and NOTHING will change because HE and our spineless Congress are owned by the NRA?

    Here’s your very 1st morning inspirational tweet from Fearful Leader:
    (It appears he awoke with his patriotic buttplug inserted.)

    https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/915179824012042241

  • MynameisBlarney
    • shastakoala

      I saw a blurb somewhere about pumpkin spice kitty litter. Double eww.

      • MynameisBlarney

        Pumpkin Spice must be stopped.

        • wide_stance_hubby

          Or just fucking admit that there is nothing seasonal about artificial Pumpkin Spice flavor/scent, so why the hysteria?

          • Donna Mueller

            they want you to think that it’s natures bounty, not a powder they extract from a reactor vessel at a flavor and fragrance factory in east hanover, n.j.

        • shastakoala

          Zig-A-Zig Ah

      • Me not sure

        Not today. Not ever.

    • Duke

      Everything good is just a quick google away.
      http://www.snopes.com/photos/risque/graphics/psc.jpg

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Is there a hole carved into that pumpkin?

    • Kneeling Bozilingus

      Pumpkin Spice, the most pretentious Spice Girl.

      • Old Man Yells at Cloud

        Wasn’t Pumpkin Spice actually Lil’Donnie in drag?

  • therblig
  • Marceline

    I’m calling the Milo marriage a false flag.

    • wide_stance_hubby

      I read that as ‘false fag’. Works either way.

      • Me not sure

        Tip to Milo’s husband: ALWAYS use condoms. One never knows.

        • wide_stance_hubby

          And at least 5. One never knows.

      • Marceline

        As a straight woman, I don’t consider that my word to use but…yeah.

        • wide_stance_hubby

          It did seem oddly used, but skimming is a deceptive thing.

          And thank you for not using it generally.

      • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

        I thought about commenting like you did but decided against it.

        {{{redacted}}} Milo {{{censored}}} a burning piece of wood.

        • Erala Contratista

          Hunka hunka burnin’ looooooove!?

      • Serai 1

        What’s the opposite of a beard?

    • Bill D. Burger
  • Bill D. Burger
    • kaydenpat

      “Thoughts and prayers” are what you offer when you have nothing else to give.

      • Bill D. Burger

        It’s really a way of saying, “Look at ME! Look at all I AM doing….how I am suffering.” Useless and self promoting nonsense.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        “Thoughts and prayers” are what you offer when that’s all you want to give.

        FIFY

      • wide_stance_hubby

        Even cheaper than a card.

    • Historicat

      If I’m on a plane that’s plummeting down, the passenger next to me is welcome to to all the thoughts and prayers they want. On the other hand, the pilot better have his or her hands on the damn controls.

    • Opiwan

      Especially since we’re making armor piercing rounds a thing now, if Congress gets their way.

  • The Librarian

    Mr. Mack passed the buck to a newbie for his fake congressional hearing. In a basement no less, so nobody would find out? Good job rat-fucking your party with this shit, sir, though your party doesn’t really need the help. They do a fine job all by themselves.

  • Bill D. Burger
    • kaydenpat

      Stop it!! You’re hurting the feelings of guns. It’s too early to talk about gun violence, you liberal commie!!
      /s

    • oldmechanician

      obviously people are too dangerous to be trusted with guns then.

    • From Russia with Love

      Thermonuclear warheads is the price of freedom, Bill D.

  • Bub, the cynical zombie
    • Duke

      Drain the swamp! And take that oily sheen to the neighbors downhill!

    • He’s a contender for the Cabinet Member of the Month award.

      He was narrowly outdone last month by both, Mnuchin and Price with Price coming out the winner.

    • kaydenpat

      Not even shocking for this regime. Sigh.

    • wide_stance_hubby

      WHOA if.

    • Bill D. Burger
    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Did anybody expect anything else from this fucker?

    • 🛶🗣️ Mr Canoehead 🛶🗣️

      That doesn’t sound plausible. He “almost never” meets with environmental or citizen groups implies it’s ever happened.

  • disqus_lWwzrwNaw6

    Bill O’Reilly’s “price of freedom” line got to me uniquely, even in the flood of white noise (very white) that smoked up all day yesterday to try to keep people from talking about the NRA and Wayne LaPierre and the $11 billion a year the gun industry makes off mass death and terror.

    This smug line, coming as it did on top of Wisconsin/Koch Senator Ron Johnson’s recent bland, smirking remarks to a group of Wisconsin high schoolers, to the effect that Americans don’t have a right to food, clothing, shelter or health care, but they do have a fundamental right to be “free,” it just made me, I don’t know, ready to hurl a blunt, heavy object, or maybe just to hurl.

    As a matter of principle I don’t like to be lectured about “freedom” by overfed men with bespoke suits, armed bodyguards, private planes, and multiple, posh, costly residences in gated communities.

    I especially don’t like to be told that I am “free” to be shot, to starve to death or freeze in the streets, or to die prematurely of a preventable disease, because Freedom has given me the Freedom to choose all those things, and if the worst happens, it’s because I didn’t have the initiative to be born to a billion dollar trust fund, like Charles Koch, or grift my way into massive wealth, like Wayne LaPierre or Bill O’Reilly.

    So many things Freedom has not given me.

    While it has given me the right to do without food, shelter, clothing, medical attention, and a fundamental sense of dignity, Freedom has not given me the right to abort an unwanted pregnancy, to refuse to say a prayer at a public meeting in the state of Michigan, to kneel during the playing of the national anthem, to criticize a cop, or to speak up against a Republican politician in a public meeting without fear of arrest.

    As Brecht observed, “first feed the belly, then talk right and wrong.”

    Freedom is meaningless if you can at any moment be shot dead by a madman (or a cop), if your livelihood can be destroyed because you have taken a stand that has activated the right wing hate machine, or if you have to watch your child die of asthma because the polluters have Freedom, but you don’t have health care coverage for the kids.

    Fuck “Freedom.” It’s past time for a little justice, truth, and equity, here in the land of the free and the home of the brave.

    • (((Alt-Sedagive)))

      *Standing ovation*

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      As Joe Frazier once said, “kill the body and the head will die”.

    • Persistent Tennessee Rain

      We are no longer a free people. We are slaves to the gun humpers.

  • Bub, the cynical zombie

    https://twitter.com/JohnJHarwood/status/915203116693442560
    https://twitter.com/JohnJHarwood/status/915182783370285056
    This is what happens when the right hand doesn’t know whose pocket the left hand is picking.

    • Duke

      Real economists know that the #1 thing the government can do to stimulate the economy is to borrow and spend.

      This is only true, for Republicans, when the economy is already doing well and there isn’t a black president.

    • Rocket Pony Ron

      It just hit me: the debt that will be reduced and the 3% growth? They’re talking about the 0.1%. The nation can get fucked for all they care.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        The debt goes on the shoulders of the 99.9%.
        The growth? Yeah, that’s for the other guys.

    • bubbuhh

      two dick jokes in one pair of pants

  • Nounverb911
  • Dutchman

    It’s really pretty simple. The dyed in the wool Second Amendment fetishists have won that argument regarding any restrictions on guns or gun ownership. They’ve not only won the argument but done so quite convincingly. This is not an “electoral college” win it’s overwhelming.
    As part of that we’ve now been instructed and firmly so, that it’s just unacceptable to even have a conversation or discussion about gun laws of any kind. We have had legislative action this year that allows even the most mentally ill among us to own as many high powered, high capacity weapons as their hearts desire. There is pending legislative action that will allow anyone to carry a weapon nearly without restriction. Similarly, they can have it silenced so that they can drop their intended targets and ease away without detection.
    We get it, you won. Consequently, you own all of it. Those of us that are not anti-gun but do believe that a conversation can and should be held about reasonable, let me say again, reasonable gun laws no longer have a voice or culpability. Each new “largest massacre” or “mass casualty” event is entirely yours. You own it.
    So I would ask that you please don’t get your feelings hurt or feel that we’re targeting you (poor word choice?) when these events are occurring daily and we start to ask you “How many deaths are you responsible for today?”

    • Persistent Tennessee Rain

      Normal people have to live in fear and their level of enjoyment of life has to be sufficiently decreased so that these assholes who live in fear can have all the guns they want. There is not one fucking person in this country who needs to own a weapon that is intended to kill as many people in as short of time as possible. Home invaders don’t usually break into your home in packs. I am so fucking sick of these goddamned gun humpers. Fuck them all sideways with a rusty chainsaw. If you really think you need to own ten assault weapons then you have proven you are too mentally unstable to own any weapons. Buy a fucking dog.

      • Dutchman

        Agreed but pity the poor dog…..

      • miss_grundy

        Get a freaking burglar alarm! And get a dog! But owning a military weapon isn’t going to help you. Actually, you will either hurt yourself with it, or your children will hurt themselves.

      • sgt. jmk of the résistance

        The dog is a better bet for home protection, anyway. Burglars burgle when no one is home, and they don’t usually try houses with dogs, but they love houses with guns… they’re easy to fence.

        • Ω cynmac’s reclaiming her time

          My dog barks when people come up on the porch, but only when I am home, according to my neighbor.

    • From Russia with Love

      As I’ve said before, national and local agency checks for all weapons (they are weapons, not guns) purchases would go a long way to keeping firearms out of the hands of loonies, without actually abridging normal people’s access to firearms at all.

      • laineypc

        Incomplete info about the shooter and all that, but by all accounts so far, no system that we currently have would have detected his crazy. I would go so far to say that we have a sickness in our society that would allow many of us who function in our everyday lives, hold down a job and take care of our family and have social lives etc to actually contemplate mass killing. Normal people use guns to kill with far too much frequency.
        The right to own assault-type weaponry must be abridged at the very least.

        • From Russia with Love

          Baby steps. The background checks are not in violation of the second amendment, and would likely be more palatable to the gun lobby. Also, after the 30th or 40th background check on this current nutcase, somebody would have noticed.

    • miss_grundy

      Hey, hey NRA!
      How many people did you shoot today?

  • Bill D. Burger
    • Phoenixdoglover

      Uncle Wayne’s lifelike covering is starting to sag away from the chassis.

      • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

        Human suits sag eventually, it’s the evil burning its way out.

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Bill D. Burger
  • Bill D. Burger
  • (((Aron)))

    Rock badgers! So treyf!

  • Bill D. Burger
    • miss_grundy

      Can Captain America beat the shite out of him now?????

    • Courser_Resistance

      Hmm, mebbe I need to re-watch Captain America: Civil War again….

  • Msgr_MΩment
    • miss_grundy

      Detroit was the Arsenal of Democracy during WWII.

  • Bill D. Burger
    • miss_grundy

      I hope the Wayback Machine has saved all of his anti-Bamz tweets over the years. So we can continue to use the same messages against him on a daily basis.

      • Ω cynmac’s reclaiming her time

        Also saved? The deleted tweets. No pussy edits allowed.

  • Bub, the cynical zombie
    • ariel_gee_398

      Good. Now that everyone is distracted by Vegas, I was worried about Puerto Rico. I mean, it’s awful, but I’m glad someone is stepping up.

      • VirginiaMorningBlend

        Now if some organization would fund CHIP our kids and their families would feel better.

        • ariel_gee_398

          *waves towards the Great White North* Yo Canada, some help here?

    • From Russia with Love

      Maybe they can drop off some body bags in Vegas before hand?

    • miss_grundy

      Joy needs to get out more and realize that our country has been publicly humiliated on a daily basis since January 20th, 2017. And again, when you have a brown-hating president in the White House, you can expect this kind of response when an emergency occurs.

      • Serai 1

        Oh, did you not notice the “again” in her statement?

    • bubbuhh

      I bet the NSA has put OX-FAM on their terrorist watch list

      • well trump will for sure.

  • MynameisBlarney

    Country music guitarist renounces support for 2nd Amendment.

    https://www.rawstory.com/2017/10/country-musician-who-played-at-las-vegas-festival-reverses-pro-gun-stance-after-deadly-massacre/

    Sad that it takes being in a massacre to see the light.

    • cmd resistor

      If it works.

    • pstokk

      Sadder that it took him personally almost getting shot to see the light. At least he owns up to it.

      • From Russia with Love

        Nothing quite like being shot at to get you mind right.

    • Bub, the cynical zombie

      It is sad. But I’d rather see that reaction than “Gotta buy more guns!” I read that on twitter yesterday, and at least one person was berating him for his sudden change of heart. FFS! You want people to reassess their positions and to change their minds! Blasting them when they come around for how long it took them is stupid and counterproductive.

    • miss_grundy

      I guess seeing your fellow man turned into Swiss cheese to make you realize that there is a problem. As usual, until these people are personally affected they don’t understand the problem.

      • Boscoe

        Pretty much the same way they can’t recognize the correct response to nazis, since they didn’t personally see their friends turned to hamburger at Normandy.

        • Ω cynmac’s reclaiming her time

          Nah, they actually agree with Nazis. For the most part.

    • Persistent Tennessee Rain

      And yet, so many of us were able to see there was a problem without witnessing it firsthand. I’m glad he had a “come to Jesus” moment, but fuck him anyway.

    • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

      Meanwhile, Jason Aldean is still runnin’.

    • laineypc

      a massacre of mostly white people

      • puredog

        Mostly white mostly straight people.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “We carefully review all of our news sources and 4chan was certified reliable by employee James Damore…goddam it.”
    — Google

    • Boscoe

      I still don’t grasp why anyone would ever pay attention to “news” or an ad that’s on google or facebook. Might as well get your “news” from the checkout at Safeway. Reuters or GTFO.

  • miss_grundy

    Thank you for the nice time videos! I would rather watch those right now than have to deal with reading about stupid RWNJs like O’Reilly. Perhaps Cardinal Torquemada could resurrect himself and have a session will Billo. The kind that involve things that we are not allowed to comment about. But if he could ratchet up the pain levels on this guy to unendurable that would make me very happy. And all of this without the benefit of votes, of course.

    • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

      I’d like to subscribe to your newsletter.

  • Panika MCD

    I would think the over 500 people in LV hospitals with bullet wounds right now don’t feel very free. likewise, the friends and family members would say that their 59 dead loved ones aren’t fucking free at all, BillO. it was a goddamned country music festival, not a liberal orgy like Burning Man. there were likely people from across the political spectrum there including people who like guns. I don’t think “this is what freedom smells like!” is very comforting to anyone.

    also too: NPR just had some guy on that said a mass shooting is defined by “four or more people killed” which is wrong. it is: four or more people hit with bullets from the same shooter in one event.

    • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

      It would be ironic if one of those he lauds would pay him an up close and personal visit.

  • Panika MCD

    and Topo Chico has been bought by Coca Cola. MOTHERFUCKER!

    • SDGeoff3

      I had to look it up. Never heard of it! Wow! Olde Trendy Waters!

      • Panika MCD

        if they fuck with the recipe, we’re all screwed. if they make it available to others without messing with the recipes: YAY! I’m suspicious, though.

        • SDGeoff3

          Well then, Ima see if I can find me some!! We gave up Mexican Coca Cola when we read about community wells being bled dry in Tecate by Coke.

          • Panika MCD

            damn. I like Mexican Coca Cola. but not as much as I love Dublin Dr Pepper.

          • SDGeoff3

            ? There is an even better Dr Pepper? SQUEEEE!!!

          • Panika MCD

            fuck yeah! it is made with cane sugar under the original recipe, but is only available within 100 miles of the bottling plant in Dublin, TX.

          • SDGeoff3

            Ooo now I’m excited. Not available online somehow? I must investigate.

          • Panika MCD
          • SDGeoff3

            Holy guacamole! Fortunately I can afford to look into massive quantities of Jelly Bellys for a mere $13.49!

    • LeighBowery’sLuxuryComedy
  • IdiokraticCulturalMarxist
  • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

    Every fucking time I hear “thoughts and prayers” I want to break shit.

    • Bub, the cynical zombie
      • SDGeoff3

        This is why we’re going nertz. What passes for reason and logical thought is not working for these alleged humans.

      • Pisto75666

        Then my response to that person would be, then apparently you care more for your shitty guns than the lives of your fellow human beings. Please go fuck yourself at your earliest convenience.

  • Marion in Savannah

    Thanks for the linky to the WaPo graphic. Surprise, surprise! Both my senators and my odious congresscritter have taken bux from the NRA.

  • Note to Dampnut: We don’t think you’re crazy, we think you’re stupid and lack the capacity for rational thought.

    • Serai 1

      Oh, most of us think he’s crazy. I certainly do. That is not a mind that is working on all thrusters.

  • VirginiaMorningBlend

    The world needs more hyraxes and less money lovers.

    • Daniel

      That was actually the line in the original draft of the song, but they couldn’t think of a rhyme so they switched it to “love, sweet love”.

  • bubbuhh

    The Gun Silencer Bill also includes the legalization of armor piercing bullets cuz Bambi iz buyin body armor, I guess

    • BigCSouthside

      None of these fucking gun laws are based in reality. If you are an avid hunter you need:
      1 12 gauge capable of firing steel shot
      1 rifle that shoots straight walled old type ammo and holds 3 rds
      1 long range rifle, bolt action for open plains hunting

      That’s it. No fucking pistols. Nothing with detachable mags. No goddamn suppressors or ridiculous armor piercing high velocity rounds. You can take any large game in North America with a rifle invented in 1894 and anything that flies or smaller critters with pretty much any 12 gauge.

      • Hardly Ideal

        That’s the thing I can’t believe people don’t get. Your 5.56 guns are too small for big game and too overpowered for small game, but they’re great for killing people. If memory serves, that’s what the 5.56 NATO was made for.

      • Ling Ling

        You left off the air conditioned 4wd monster mobility scooter and a case of lowbrau. No hunting trip is worth starting without it.

    • Sunhead

      It has never been about hunting.
      Here in Oz when the last mass shooting happened, the rhetoric was “No competent hunter needs a semi auto or more then 5 in the magazine. If you can’t hit what you are shooting at take a long hard look at yourself.”
      Hunting is why your average redneck will keep supporting the NRA because of the lies about the cityfolks coming to take your guns. Frankly they rely on hunting for meat on the table. They also have great-grandpappy’s Civil War carbine and pistols up on the wall that they think you want to take. And they are told that that heritage is what will be taken from them. Their family heirloom guns.
      AR’s and Auto’s and bump stocks and such they are the prepper stuff, the home defence and doomsday cultist stuff.
      It’s not about Hunting and it never was.

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    Also too, another rage inducing fact that is a threat to our democracy: On NPR this morning, I heard that in one state (I think it was Wisconsin), Republicans made up 48% of the vote, but Republicans make up 2/3rds of their congress critters. So, the vote of a dumbass Republican counts more than that of a Democrat. That’s just wrong. I really hate those fuckers. They have no shame.

    • Up In Smoke O’hontas

      Yup, it’s Wisco. Any bets on how SCOTUS will decide? The state goopers lost at the district level, so now tax money gets to pay for their continued fuckery, the fuckers.

      • supposedly last redistricting case (2003?) kennedy was willing to be persuaded that there could be a political test but that test did not yet exist.

        several clever academic/stats types have come up with a formula that i believe will be part of this case. the economist described it a couple weeks back (something something subtracting lack of min votes from excess maj votes?) but i live in trump’s america so have dedicated those brain cells to rage and alcohol.

        • BigCSouthside

          I played around with that formula. It’s pretty cool. And pretty obviously demonstrates cracking and packing

          • right that was it.

            though i am not at all confident that we will win with that stolen SCOTUS.

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    It really chaps my ass when the media praises Trump for doing what he’s supposed to do. He’s supposed to “be presidential.” Every waking moment of every day, he’s supposed to be presidential because he’s the goddamned president.

    I think I need to take a break or risk having an aneurysm

    • well you know he’ll be back to being “unconvential” tomorrow or something.

      also, the russia is always simmering JUST under the surface and it makes him crazy.

      • Pisto75666

        Crazi-ER

        FTFY :D

    • Boscoe

      What chaps my ass is that he requires at least 24 hours of badgering before he reluctantly “does what he’s supposed to do”. EVERY FUCKING TIME.

      -And THEN the media praises him for it.

  • Jamoche

    NASA publishes before-and-after satellite images of Puerto Rico at night to help responders find the places without power:
    https://earthobservatory.nasa.gov/IOTD/view.php?id=91044&eocn=home&eoci=iotd_title

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      AOTK?

      • Jamoche

        Not quite, but it’s still very bad.

  • Serai 1

    So much for any lingering horseshit about the Evil Spawn being somehow “better” than their disgusting Jabba sire.

    • Boscoe

      Right? Sigh. I can still remember when we were young and dumb and desperately grasping at straws…

      • Serai 1

        Oh, did you fall for that? She rang the Bitch Alarm on day one for me. And I sure as shit never trusted her slimy little weasel of a husband.

  • eyelashviper

    The over abundance of horrible news is eating away at all of us. I have turned off the teevee, only watch movies or documentaries on Netflix, and try to avoid hearing the whining of the Hoofwanker, as it causes me great angst.
    Every week is another horror, another catastrophe, and the Parasitic Dotard just doubles down on his vile rants and tweets. A meddlesome pest, for sure, seeking a solution.
    This article is really excellent, and clearly describes the complete lack of concern for PR, especially comprared to the vast and swift response to Harvey and Irma.
    It makes my blood boil, again..

    http://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2017/10/02/us-military-puerto-rico-215668

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      I started reading that last night while I lay awake in the wee hours. Thanks for posting the link for people who actually sleep at night.

      • eyelashviper

        Sleep? What is this thing called sleep? I have a vague memory of it, really nice, and waking up feeling good…strange times.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    I think it’s kind of fun that the hottest talking point in wingnuttery is that public colleges full of impressionable teenagers should be forced to listen to a gay pedophilia apologist who’s married to a dude now without making any objections.

    • Serai 1

      Nothing’s out of bounds if it profits them.

    • Bitter Scribe

      But he’s one of the GOOD gays. Just like all those Israelis, he’ll go into the Lake of Fire once he’s dead, but until then, he has his uses.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        He thinks having sex with pre-pubescent boys is cute.

  • Angela Ruzzo

    I keep reading the quote from Las Vegas Sheriff Lombardo that there is nothing we could have done to prevent the massacre. But there is – if every single gun purchase required a permit, including shotguns, and if there was then a state and national database kept of every single permit issued, and if the software was designed to alert authorities that one person had bought 40+ rifles, shotguns and hand guns in a short time period, and assuming the IT staff were trained and doing their job, then something could have been done. It wouldn’t catch every gun because some are bought illegally or stolen, but it would catch most of them. They could also track large purchases of ammunition. This is very simple, guys, and we are already doing something similar for large deposits, withdrawals or transfers of money, but it is the #1 thing the NRA objects to. I wonder why that is?

    • Serai 1

      Imagine how likely the massacre would have been if you couldn’t GET those guns in the first place.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        Very true. But more people would fight that, and fight it longer, than would fight a permit system. We used to HAVE a permit system for years and years, and that was long before computers made background checks faster. In my father’s day, 50 years ago, it took 2 weeks to get a permit approved. Now it can be done instantaneously if you have an internet connection, so the Right’s argument that permits present an obstacle to exercising your 2nd Amendment rights is total bullshit. We require permits for cars, motorcycles, flying a plane, fishing, hunting, importing, exporting, running a business, selling alcohol, and some cities even require residency permits before you can move into your house. I’m sure there are more things that require permits, but I can’t think of them right now. The only reason why there is a gun permit issue is because the NRA has decided to make it an issue, for reasons that make no sense whatsoever but have to do with money. Lots and lots of money.

        • Pisto75666

          It didn’t occur to me until today but we’re not supposed to talk about gun control but when the Pulse shooting happened, it wasn’t soon enough to talk about how the shooter might have been Muslim and not an American citizen.

          ISN’T THAT WEIRD?! /s

          • Angela Ruzzo

            Too weird. Maximum weird. Weirdoholic, in fact. I just finished reading this article on that subject.
            How America has silently accepted the rage of white men
            http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/03/opinions/mass-shootings-white-male-rage-modan-opinion/index.html

          • Pisto75666

            Great article! And spot on. Funnily enough (on the topic of men) this week I noticed a new fresh wave of Whataboutism emerged on Twitter. “Guns kill people? Well what about abortion?! That kills people too! hurr durr” And I can’t say for sure if most of those accounts were male, but based on names I saw, they were.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            There are women who protest abortion, but I have never heard or seen one use the gun comparison. That’s definitely more likely to be a male thing.

    • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

      Gun sales go up after a massacre. T-rump getting elected was their worst nightmare. Gun sales had plummeted.

  • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

    More fucked up news (from NYT):

    In the 1980s, researchers started tracking algae blooms in Lake Erie. They were mostly small, but changes in farming practices caused them to spike.

    The blooms are expected to grow more harmful as global warming changes rainfall patterns.

    According to local experts, storms have become more intense in the region, carrying more nutrients from the farmland into the lake.

    Another study shows that extensive algae blooms will continue to grow throughout the continental United States and around the globe, especially in Southeast Asia.

    The mayor of Toledo, Paula Hicks-Hudson, wrote a letter to President Trump on Sept. 26, calling on the federal government to declare Lake Erie impaired, which would allow for the lake’s nutrient loads to be regulated under the Clean Water Act.

    “There is something very wrong with our country when our rivers and lakes turn green,” Ms. Hicks-Hudson wrote in her letter. “As I look out my office at a green river, I can tell you one thing: The status quo is not working.”

    • Serai 1
    • TundraGrifter

      I had an interesting conversation with a farmer over the weekend. He advocates “no till” farming that uses far less water and has far less runoff.

      • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

        Yes, that is exactly what is needed. We’re headed toward another goddamn dustbowl. Plus, no-till is much better economically for farmers. There is simply no downside.

      • Sunhead

        You know the thing about Farmers. They use science. They write down the weather observations and rainfall, the fertilizer they use, anything different they are doing in a field and then the crop yield they get.
        They know what is happening. They know that they are spending more and more on fertilizer and pesticide for lower yields. They are finding alternatives, like No Till, like co planting, like Fallow fields.

  • Hardly Ideal

    Let me know when Milo gets married to a Venus-bound rocket, then I’ll celebrate.

  • Saxo the Grammarian
  • Shoebutton

    Devos is planning a little trip to Ontario on Thursday to observe the public school system.

    Ontario Teachers are not pleased at all.
    Ontario teachers’ organizations and unions expressed disappointment at news of the visit.
    “DeVos represents everything a public education advocate opposes,” Ontario
    Teachers’ Federation president Chris Cowley wrote on Twitter. “She should keep her backwards ideas out of Ontario.”

    The head of the Ontario Secondary School Teachers’ Federation said in a
    statement that he is “extremely concerned” about plans to allow DeVos to
    visit Ontario schools.

    “Ms. DeVos is a vocal proponent of programs that divert government funding away from public education and into private hands, to pay for tuition at private and religious schools,” Harvey Bischof wrote in a statement.

    “The Ministry of Education should reconsider this visit and send a strong, clear message to Ms. DeVos and other proponents of privatization that public education in Ontario is not for sale.”

    https://www.thestar.com/news/canada/2017/10/02/trumps-controversial-education-secretary-betsy-devos-to-visit-ontario-to-learn-about-public-school-system.html

  • Red Bird

    The irony of exercising a right you fought hard to deny for others.

  • miss_grundy

    Fuckface von Clownstick has decided to blame P.R. for ripping the budget to shreds because the people on the island need “help”. And he wants his FEMA underlings in P.R. to give him a round robin of praise. I kid you not!

    http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/entry/trump-visits-puerto-rico_us_59d3640de4b0655781554854

  • BreakingDeadMen

    The cost of freedom, Bill? Well, it’s definitely buried in the ground.

  • Celtic_Gnome

    So sadz about Tom Petty. I’ve never been to Florida. Has anything else good ever come out of Gainesville?

    • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

      He is the best thing ever to come out of Gainesville. But it is a college town so I’m sure there are more good things.

  • Longstreet63

    Fun fact: Hyraxes look like rats, but are actually small, furry land manatees.

    • Skeptical_thinker

      Hyraxes are the closest living relatives of elephants, too, also and in addition.

      • Longstreet63

        It’s a really interesting family reunion they have.

  • guppy06

    NO WONDER they forgot to tell anyone about their emails, there’s just so many!

    is this why Jared’s team keeps getting pranked? Is it that nobody can keep track of which addresses are real and which are fake?

  • sosuume
  • Khavrinen

    “which Congress critters have been accepting NRA blood money.”

    Wow, I found that chart really surprising.
    There are six states, plus DC, where NRA donations haven’t been accepted?!? That’s much higher than I was expecting.

  • Khavrinen

    Hmmm, Pat Robertson and Eric Cartman: Guess which one’s authori-tay I have more respect for?

  • Zyxomma

    Thanks, Dominic.

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