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Sadly, the prisoners today tend not to be Gentlemen like Mr. Pickwick
Victorian Family Values

Did you hear the one about the president’s son-in-law whose company gets judges to order the arrest of people who owe back rent? The punch line is, it’s perfectly legal and lots of companies do it, at least in Maryland, which allows the arrest of those who miss court appearances in cases of unpaid debt. The Baltimore Sun found that since 2013, the Kushner companies have requested arrest for 105 former tenants in Maryland, because business is business and breaking legs to collect debts remains illegal.

The arrests, which have the appropriately old-timey name “body attachments,” aren’t technically for debt, because heaven knows it’s not yet a crime to be poor. The Sun explains how it works:

When a landlord wins a judgment against a tenant, he or she may ask the judge to order the tenant to appear in court to answer questions about assets and employment to determine garnishments. If the tenant fails to appear, the judge may issue another summons to determine why the person shouldn’t be held in contempt.

If the tenant again fails to show up, the landlord can ask the judge to issue a body attachment.

When a tenant is arrested, a judge or commissioner can hold him or her and set a bond. Defendants unwilling or unable to pay the bond can end up in jail.

The Kushner Companies certainly aren’t the only property management company to use the tactic, but they’re definitely the most aggressive, requesting more arrests than any other landlord in the state, according to court records reviewed by the Sun. In all, 20 former Kushner tenants went to the pokey for some period of time.

Needless to say, the Kushner Companies insist they only seek body attachments as a last resort after other collections attempts fail, and they follow state and federal law. You have to get people to pay up, don’t you? And nothing gets their attention like slapping them in jail, so they lose their jobs and become less able to pay. The logic is indisputable.

Bleeding heart liberals and consumer advocates, who hate successful people, have been making all sorts of excuses for poor people and calling for legislation to limit or eliminate body attachments, because they have no respect for tradition. Maryland Attorney General Brian Frosh says that judges may issue the orders on insufficient evidence, like a landlord’s assertions, without written records, about debts and attempts at collection. Frosh and other reform advocates also note that tenants may not even recognize the name of the collection company when a debt has been sold. They argue that in some cases, those who end up being arrested didn’t actually receive notice of the court appearances they ended up missing:

“People are being arrested for a debt that they may not even be aware of, or for a court date they may not have been aware of,” said state Sen. William C. Smith, a Montgomery County Democrat. Being arrested, he said, has a “devastating effect.”

Smith introduced a bill in Maryland’s General Assembly earlier this year to place limits on body attachments, but despite support from A.G. Frosh, he ended up withdrawing it because the bill had no support in committee, where it was opposed by state Sen. H. Wayne Norman Jr. And why was Norman a problem? He’s an attorney who represents landlords, and it was clear to Smith the bill “was not going to get out of committee.”

For his part, Norman thinks body attachments are a great idea, and not just when they’re nipple piercings:

“It has nothing to do with owing money,” he said. “It has everything to do with disobeying court orders and disrespecting judges.”

Landlords spend at least $150 to file the paperwork required to compel tenants to appear to negotiate debt repayment, Norman said. He said such tenants drive up the rents for everyone else as well as jeopardize property owners’ ability to pay their mortgages.

If defendants didn’t face serious consequences, he asked, “why would anybody obey a court order?”

“The body attachment is the only thing that gets a lot of people’s attention,” he said.

He seems nice. Why isn’t there more respect for the costs incurred by put-upon slumlords like the Kushner Companies, who may have to pay a whole $150 to take poor clients to court? That really could cut into their millions of dollars in profits. Also, while Norman and other supporters of body attachments bring up the plight of small landlords who need to collect back rents to stay afloat, that’s not actually the case, according to Marceline White, executive director of the Maryland Consumer Rights Coalition. She said body attachments are mostly sought by big corporations like the Kushner Companies. White wonders whether multimillionaires like Kushner really need to be “spending all this time and money to pursue people who have fallen behind.”

Obviously, people should be paying their bills. But arresting someone years after seems fairly extreme.

Clearly, a socialist who doesn’t want the rich to be rewarded for their hard work.

The Sun piece looks at one fairly typical case: Priscilla Moreno, a school bus driver, was sued in 2015 by her former landlord, a Kushner affiliated company, for $7,100 in unpaid rent and lawyers’ fees; a body attachment warrant against her was approved last July. Instead of going to jail, she filed for federal bankruptcy, a step that others facing arrest have also taken. Probably a good idea, since she had debts of $60,000 and an annual income of $31,000.

The body attachment order “was very extreme,” she said. For weeks, she lived in fear that she could be stopped for a traffic violation and end up in jail.

“If you don’t have the money you have to stay in jail until you pay,” she said.

Well, look, lady, if you’d just shown up in court and made your case, you wouldn’t be in so much trouble. We’re a nation of laws, and if you want to get away with stuff like not paying your bills, you need to be a (self-claimed) billionaire casino owner. The law is the law, and unless you’re a presidential son-in-law who forgot to fill out your security clearance paperwork with every single meeting with some Russians, you’d better not expect to get any breaks.

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[Baltimore Sun]

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  • armed_bears

    Dearest Congress,

    Where is the fucking outrage?

    Sincerely,
    Section 4, 25th Amendment

    • Nounverb911

      Deferred until after the midterms?

      • Covfefe’s Evil Twin

        Deferred until after the midterms tax cuts.

        FTFY

  • Don’t worry, I’m sure the Republicans will find an equitable solution: like indentured servitude until you pay off your debt.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      While indentured, you will be paid in Trump Scrip, good only toward the purchase of Ivanka’s “designer” clothing and Trump Steaks.

      • Suttree

        At least you will have something to burn your steaks with.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      You haven’t heard about the prison labor being used in for profit prisons?

  • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

    ye gods, i don’t think we pull this crap even in Texas.

  • coozledad

    The return of the enslaver state. It’s not just for nonwhites anymore.

    OT, but Robert E. Lee’s great great great great? grandniece has something to say about those fucking statues.
    http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/347741-descendent-of-robert-e-lee-hits-trump-you-shouldnt-defend

  • Bill D. Burger

    Kushner family motto when it comes to the 99%ers….or THOSE PEOPLE, as they call them.

    http://weknowmemes.com/generator/uploads/generated/g1399563215211919893.jpg

  • Nounverb911

    I doubt that Kushner has ever seen one of the apartments he rents, I wonder (well not really) what his reaction would be.

    • “How disgusting the people who live here must be! Who would choose this dump as a home?”
      [sniff]

  • memzilla Ω

    Body attachments, another specialty of the law firm of Kickham, Wyle, Thayer & Downe.

  • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

    speaking of legal fuckery, I haven’t read the story yet, but the headline is intriguing:

    “A Federal Judge Put Hundreds of Immigrants Behind Bars While Her Husband Invested in Private Prisons”

    http://www.motherjones.com/crime-justice/2017/08/a-federal-judge-put-hundreds-of-immigrants-behind-bars-while-her-husband-invested-in-private-prisons/

    • jesterpunk

      Another judge putting people in prison to make money for themselves? I am shocked that would happen again.

    • “M”

      I know it’s only television, but this was sufficiently illegal in Billions that the judge played by Anthony Edwards was arrested when the U.S. Attorney for S.D.N.Y. came into his office with the FBI officers from the Eastern District to do so, and the SDNY character was modeled on Preet Bharara:

      “Chuck Rhoades

      Few big pieces of news here. Remember that judge that got in Rhoades’ way last episode, the one played by Anthony Edwards? Well, he obstructed Rhoades’ will once again this week by ruling in favor of Dollar Bill Stern. In his ruling, he even admonished the prosecutors for pursuing a “personal” vendetta.

      This rankled Rhoades. So, he had his man in the Eastern District dig up dirt on the judge — and dirt they found. Turns out, the judge has made large investments in private prison contractors that make big money of their incarcerated inmates. And the judge has been instrumental in providing them with those inmates: For years, he’s been over-convicting poor and young defendants of color, giving them giant sentences for small offenses. Busted.”
      http://ew.com/recap/billions-season-1-episode-10/2/

      What I guess I’m asking is whether some knowledgeable soul can help me find the SEC violation & related statutes pursuant to which this egregious miscarriage of justice can be suitably abrogated & punished?

  • bookish

    https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2017/08/gop-responding-to-trumps-response/537696/?google_editors_picks=true

    But it appears there’s at least one influential group that Trump can still count on for support: the institutional Republican Party.

    In the wake of the violence in Charlottesville, The Atlantic reached out to 146 Republican state party chairs and national committee members for reaction to Trump’s handling of the events. We asked each official two questions: Are you satisfied with the president’s response? And do you approve of his comment that there were “some very fine people” who marched alongside the Ku Klux Klan and neo-Nazis?

    The vast majority refused to comment on the record, or simply met the questions with silence. Of the 146 GOP officials contacted, just 22 offered full responses—and only seven expressed any kind of criticism or disagreement with Trump’s handling of the episode. (Those seven GOP leaders represent New Mexico, Texas, Virginia, North Dakota, Alaska, Massachusetts, and North Carolina.) The rest came to the president’s defense, either with statements of support or attempts at justification.

    • Covfefe’s Evil Twin

      Fucking party of goddamn assholes.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      You can’t spell “Party Hack” without “Ack!”

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    I suspect Donnie’s questions to Jared were a little different from most fathers to their prospective son-in-law. “Are you as greedy and avaricious as me? Do you like to welsh on your debts and blame others? Was your own father a criminal too? Oh, and btw, it’s OK to grab pussy.”

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    The judges bear some of the blame here. I’d be very surprised if the issuance of a warrant were not discretionary.

    • ariel_gee_398

      Well, judges need money to run for re-election, and I’m guessing poor people who can’t make their rent make lousy donors.

      • Michael Smith

        But landlords on the other hand…

      • Paul

        One more reason judges should not be elected, they should be appointed.

  • Villago Delenda Est

    The Kushner family seems to be devoted to reinforcing the most odious of stereotypes applied to Jews.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      It’s ironic that Jared’s behavior conforms to every stereotype that his father-in-law has expressed about Jews.

  • Michael Smith

    Ah yes – you can only get away with defaulting on your debts if you are rich. If you owe some contractor 1.2 million for hotel renovations and decide not to pay up, that’s fine! If you owe some landlord $500 and are short on that money right now, then its off with your head!

    • Villago Delenda Est

      It’s an old adage. if you owe the bank $10,000, it’s your problem. If you owe the bank $10,000,000, it’s the bank’s problem.

  • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

    The Sun piece looks at one fairly typical case: Priscilla Moreno, a school bus driver, was sued in 2015 by her former landlord, a Kushner affiliated company, for $7,100 in unpaid rent and lawyers’ fees;

    In other words, $100 in unpaid rent and $7,000 in lawyers’ fees.

  • ariel_gee_398

    And what percentage of Trump supporters think this is a-okay, even admirable, because they think it’s mostly happening to people that don’t look like them who should really learn to be more responsible? You can’t fix the government when it’s the people that are really broken.

    • jesterpunk

      AOT,K?

    • Nounverb911

      They are okay with it until their jobs cleaning coal go away….

  • schmannity

    I owe my soul, to the Kushner store.

    –Apologies to Tennessee Ernie Ford

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Putting the #maggot in #MAGA.

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    “We told you renting to non-white people would be trouble.” — The Kushner Companies.

  • Bill D. Burger

    How the Kushners and the Trumps view the rest of the people of this country. If you aren’t one of the 1%, you are a product to be used, as cheaply as possible, and tossed aside.
    To them, you just “taste like chicken.”

    http://kuv.me/wp-content/uploads/imgnews/chicken_2.jpg

    • Creepoman

      Actually, a little closer to pork. Don’t ask.

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Republicans read Dickens as romantic comedy.

  • Proud Liberal

    Does anybody even remember hearing Jared Kushner’s name before the 2016 election? I sure don’t. He really fucked up by being affiliated with Satan in Chief.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Once you go Trump
      You’re always a chump

    • Mr. Blobfish

      In NYC, he’s more known as the boob who bought the failing Observer newspaper.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Once the tenant is evicted for non-payment, why not just write off the loss? Why bother with all this squeezing blood from a turnip crap?

    • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

      Because if you don’t show them poors who’s boss, you’ll get laughed at down at the country club?

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      I had this conversation with a colleague. I’ve never sued a former client for unpaid fees. His answer: “Sometimes you have to send a message. Even if you don’t or can’t collect, people need to know there are consequences, or nobody will pay you.”

      I suppose he has a point, albeit one I find distasteful. Probably why he drives a Benz and I . . . don’t.

      • Stulexington

        Try casually asking one of his clients in good standing if he’s aware of this so called message. I’m betting the only person who actually knows is him, it’s not a warning it’s an ego trip.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        I’m skeptical.

        The thing I’ve heard about wealthy clients of lawyers is “They only pay you for the last case when they need you for the next one.”

      • SweetDeeKat

        I’ll bet the Benz isn’t paid for. These types tend to live large on credit.

        • Villago Delenda Est

          See Trump, Donald.

      • NastyBossetti

        How are other clients who are thinking of not paying receiving this message? Does he tell them upfront, “I will sue you for nonpayment. As proof, here are several other clients I have sued for nonpayment.”

        • UncleTravelingMatt

          I don’t know. I think it probably makes him feel better to think he’s not just standing there like a dope while people screw him out of money he earned. Realizing that you spent a good chunk of your time working for free is not fun.

          I’m not criticizing him. I’m not some purer-than-the-next-guy type who is above getting paid. I’ve never sued for fees primarily because, in my particular case, doing so would be pointless.

          • NastyBossetti

            Of course people should get paid for the work they do, and I don’t think he’s wrong to go after money he’s owed. I just didn’t understand how he thinks anyone else is getting the message. What you said makes sense – it makes him feel better to be able to tell himself he did everything he could to get paid for his work.

      • Michael Smith

        Yeah, that’s often the justification creditors use. “I don’t want people thinking they can just cheat me.” Sometimes I think its valid. If, for instance, you run Pacific Pride stations that sell fuel on credit to commercial trucking companies, and one of them runs up a $11,000 tab in a month and then refuses to pay.. There really are other trucking firms out there that would love to hear that they got away with it, or that you settled for $3,000.

        But honestly if you’re a landlord, there’s not really a community of tenants out there who talk to each other about which landlords you can push around. That’s largely in landlords’ heads, and of course its encouraged by lawyers who want the work.

    • Proud Liberal

      Because being the biggest asshole is a contest these days.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      “Blood from a stone” is one of those metaphors that gets taught in MBA programs that a ton of people just seem to completely misunderstand. Like, to some people (i.e. skinflinted rich people) there’s always a bit more you can squeeze out of the other side; i.e. squeezing blood from the stone.

      What they don’t seem to get is that you can’t squeeze blood from a stone. The blood is your own, because you’re wasting time and energy for a pitiful return. That’s the point of the metaphor you dummies.

      • Darlene Underdahl

        I think they hope a relative or kindly friend will step in. We got a friend’s mail after he attempted suicide and was bounced around various hospitals. That was a mistake; his creditors came after us, eyeing our property. They never got anything, but it was scary and a lesson to us.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        These are MBA candidates. Since metaphors can’t be seen on spreadsheets, they don’t grok metaphors.

    • OutOfOrbit

      ah the pleasures of a sadist

    • Villago Delenda Est

      “It’s the principle of the thing.”

    • Rags

      sweet. sweet legal costs. Their atty’s lurve them some.

  • Baconzgood

    OT: why don’t we have more saltenas in this country?

    http://www.boliviabella.com/saltena-recipe.html

    • Proud Liberal

      Yummy!

      • Baconzgood

        Yes they are

    • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

      I have been directed by your woman to direct you to go to the nearest medical facility and have your ticker checked. Don’t want her to be bitey, do you?

      • Baconzgood

        It’s just a mild irregular coronary palpitation

      • Baconzgood

        FYI. I ALMOST went to the ER yesterday. But I feel better now.

        I just can’t be as rambunctious today as I normally am. I’ll take it easy, eat a peach, and relax.

    • weejee

      Or, to steer things away from pork, a good chicken soup like ajiaco at Mama Lupe’s in Bogota?

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/0ada55a4d266f014dc38c49660951c220b40048fd76641ae9c1941587006b483.jpg

      • Baconzgood

        I luv Bolivian food.

  • Mr. Blobfish

    It’s Heritage, not Hate.

    • Proud Liberal

      Yeah, fuck their heritage.

    • foiled again

      I Hate their fuckin’ Heritage.

  • TundraGrifter

    Sounds to me like an attorney scam to milk the poor. In my experience most people who don’t pay their rent can’t pay their rent. Chasing them in court is pointless because they generally have no assets – they are “judgement proof.” It sure looks like in these cases all those costs and fees are just piled onto the original debt to make it worthwhile to hound them.

    What a crappy way to make a living.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      The other purpose is so that just in case they do manage to get a decent job, or somehow come into some money, you can garnish their wages. That’s if they can even get a decent job or place to live with a judgement lien like that on their credit report in the first place. Very effective at keeping the poor from rising.

      • TundraGrifter

        That’s usually only economically viable if first the debt is increased with costs, fees, shipping and handling, etc. to grow it to the point where its enough to go after.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Finding a place to live, when you’ve got a judgement against you in housing court, is damn near impossible. Landlords who don’t do credit checks are pretty scarce.

  • ken_kukec

    Looks like the Artful Dodger, schemes like Fagin.

    • wide_stance_hubby

      Waiting on Ivanka to give us a funny Tiny Tim reference.

  • ManchuCandidate

    It is a far far better thing I do. A far far better slum I own.
    -Jared

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Iron Monkey

    I think most leases have some kind of confession judgement in which the renter/debtor essentially appoints the landlord to do whatever he wants in court. It essentially means that the debtor never has a chance to appear to argue the case. Capitalism at its finest.

  • Bill D. Burger
    • weejee

      What’s with these tRump fuckers always posing in front of medals and flags when none of the assholes ever served?

      • OutOfOrbit

        it’s called “Stolen Glory”

        • Msgr_MΩment

          Compensation, also too.

      • Bill D. Burger

        And every time I see Kush, I just wanna’ scream: “Nobody fucking elected YOU to anything.”

    • Rags

      “Jared Kushner always looks like he’s remembering what someone’s roasted flesh tastes like.” FIFY

  • Msgr_MΩment

    For some reason, the title of this article got me to thinking about The Sale of Two Titties by Darles Chickens.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      As serialized by The Rude Gentleman’s Quarterly.

  • Bill D. Burger
  • SomeBigRedDog

    Someone really needs to look in this guys freezer. No, not the one in the kitchen. The one in the basement. There’s no way its not full of human body parts ready for consumption.

  • BigCSouthside

    He’s um… gonna be real “popular” in prison

  • Mavenmaven

    Remind me, why is this drek in the government?

    • Stulexington

      Because a woman had the unabashed gall to delete some of her work e-mails during a mere decade.

  • jesterpunk

    OT but if your an oil refinery in Texas watch out for the hurricane

    https://www.cnbc.com/2017/08/23/tropical-storm-harvey-springs-back-life-now-threatens-one-third-of-u-s-refining-capacity.html

    The energy industry is closely watching a developing storm that could become the first hurricane to make landfall in Texas in nine years and dump as much as two feet of rain on the heart of the U.S. refining industry.

    A hurricane warning has been issued for a section of Texas’ Gulf Coast as Tropical Storm Harvey approaches. The warning, issued Thursday morning, covers an area from Port Mansfield to Matagorda.

    If Harvey becomes a hurricane, as expected, it would be the first to come ashore in Texas since Hurricane Ike in 2008. So far a tropical storm, Harvey was heading towards the U.S. Gulf Coast from the Yucatan Peninsula and weather forecasters expect the National Hurricane Center to upgrade it to a possible Category 2.

    • foiled again

      Not to worry- Harvey’s invisible.

    • You should ice that burn

      Coming soon to our area, I’ll be anchoring the Belafonte on the bay side of St Joseph’s island. Batten the hatches!

      • jesterpunk

        I hope its not too bad, stay safe though. I was really just making fun of all the articles on this storm are about how it can hurt oil refineries instead of focusing on the people in the area.

        • You should ice that burn

          There is a lot of warm gulf water between us and Harvey, so if it develops beyond a cat 1 we will probably head inland. Thanks for the kind thoughts!

  • Joe Beese

    JK, speaking as one Jew to another, you’re not helping.

    • BearDeLaOursistance

      As a mitzvah to our Jewish friends, we’re willing to accept him into the Goyosphere.

  • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

    Please God, tell me that Trump has stiffed someone in MD and the courts are about to attach his rapidly expanded body.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “Why he’s a busy man, not like those impoverished layabouts with nothing else to do. Attachment denied.”
      — “Blind” Justice

  • Ghenghis McCann

    $7,100 in unpaid rent and lawyers’ fees

    Is there a breakdown of how much was unpaid rent, and how much was lawyer’s fees?

    • jesterpunk

      $10 in unpaid rent, $7,090 in lawyers fees?

      • Ghenghis McCann

        Pretty much my estimate too.

  • Nounverb911
    • Dutchman

      Is that a Banksy?

      • Ghenghis McCann

        If it was, somebody would have carved that chunk of the wall away, and tried to sell it at auction.

        • Elainedpatel

          Google is paying 97$ per hour! work for few hours and have longer with friends & family!
          On tuesday I got a Smart new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
          :!ap258:
          ➽➽
          ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobs548CashMediaPortal/GetPay$97/Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::!ap258l..,…

        • Faithrsanders

          Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family!!!
          On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
          !yz375d:
          ➽➽
          ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash375BuzzSoft/GetPay$97/Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::!yz375z..,…….

  • jodyleek

    Known slum-lord squeezes former tenants for unpaid rental of slums.
    I’m shocked, I tell you! Shocked!

  • Jeffery Campbell

    No, earrings are “body attachments.” What you have here is Fucked Up.

  • weejee
    • Ghenghis McCann

      ‘Worst cartoon character, ever.’

  • Marion in Savannah

    Well, they’ve got to fill those for-profit prisons SOMEHOW.

  • Michael Smith

    One time I did try to get a tenant to pay rent. It sucked. My client was this girl who was a student at the university in my town. She wound up doing a semester in Philly for some reason, and sublet her apartment to a “friend,” who didn’t pay any rent and then skipped town. This friend was quite the con artist. There was basically nothing anyone could do, and my client just paid the rent for her apartment here and the other place she was renting in Philly.

    Gotta be selective about who you lease to sometimes.

    • fawkedifiknow

      I was a small town lawyer (retired). There are indeed “many sides” to this issue, and, often-times, “good people” among the stiffed land-lords, and just as often, professional dead-beats among the “noble” poor.

    • grindstone

      We had a rental property for several years. Only one set of tenants defaulted on us, and we had to evict them with back rent owed. They were so freaking mean we cut our losses– would have cost us more in mental anguish than they were worth. Karma is a lovely bitch though. I check for their names in the police blotter on the regular, sometimes with interesting results.

    • kareemachan

      I’m trying to remember whether dogs or rental cases are more prevalent on Judge Judy…. I think they’re about even.

  • MynameisBlarney
    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Wouldn’t it be easier to just shush Trump repeatedly?

      • The Librarian

        Nah, it’s too much work. Bang him over the head with a Thorndike encyclopedia.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      Once upon a time I was in my local library, and mentioned to the librarian that this was the second time I’d borrowed a book and found out that the writer had died during the time I’d had it on loan. She picked up a copy of Maggie Thatcher’s autobiography, handed it to me, and said ‘Enjoy’.

      • MynameisBlarney

        HA!

      • Beanz&Berryz

        Clever non-verbal snark… A Hawt Librarian…

      • SadDemInTex

        Please buy a video tape of 45 speaking….and concentrate over it.

        • Ghenghis McCann

          Good idea. If I’d borrowed ‘The Art of the Deal’, I might have inadvertently killed the ghostwriter.

          • SadDemInTex

            Exactly what I was thinking

      • The Librarian

        We can be quite amusing.

    • The Librarian

      THIS 📚 ^^^^^

  • President in Exile Firefly

    It’s not even noon and I’m already feeling stabby. Well, stabbier.

  • MynameisBlarney
    • SeeTrain65

      From and ever-charming Idaho MBA named David Gustafson on the LinkedIn link:

      “President Trump did condemn the so called “alt-right” people. Obviously, you were watching your favorite fake news feeds. Where is your condemnation of the BLM terrorists and the mass destruction they caused? Where is your condemnation of the Antifa??? Oh. I see. It is because you are part of the problem in this country. I am done with the leftist-agenda – Panera Bread – corporation.

      Love this retort from the DU link, though:

      A girl is dead, the result of being murdered by a Republican, but as always these poor litle (sic) sob sisters are the perpetual victims. As always.

      Dear Dave: BLM or Antifa didn’t cause this. The White Supremacists did. They marched on Charlottesville. They carried the torches. They drove the car. They killed a woman.

      So, where is the condemnation of BLM or Antifa, Dave? The same place you extracted your screaming, uninformed rant.

      Inside your rectum.

  • foiled again

    Think I’ll reread Little Dorrit today.

    • kaydenpat

      The television serious was pretty good.

      • Peripatetic Poltroon

        The 1988 film adaptation is superb. At 6 hours long though, its appeal may be limited to people who think Wagner is a bit rushed.

        • Permit-holder Ron

          How did they manage to condense a Dickens story down to six hours?

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Is that the Disney fish movie? I had no idea it was based on a book.

    • Mehmeisterjr

      No more little Dorrits. I will have only the biggest Dorrits. The bigliest Dorrits. Great Dorrits, believe me. And the Dickensians will pay for it

      • foiled again

        Tremendous Dorrits. The best.

  • Baconzgood

    Honesty, Baconzgood’s family owns a lot of property in this area. We have had to throw out tenants for months of rent owed (for some reason people think they don’t need to pay for where they live), BUT NO ONE HAS EVER THROWN ONE IN JAIL OVER IT.

    (True story)

    • Persistent Demme

      OT, but how are you today?
      Did you see a doc?
      (Sorry for the momming.)

      • Baconzgood

        DRs are boring and they only tell you that you are sick. I don’t like doctors (dentist even less). I avoid being told I’m sick. Fresh air, a summer peach and a little walk is all one needs to live a healthy life. Oh and a shit ton of bacon

        • kareemachan

          Just don’t avoid dentists for too long. I had an appt with an endodonist last week for a root canal cuz I let things go WAY too long.

          Oh, and evidently that bad tooth was probably the cause of a series of REALLY bad bacterial sinus infections I’ve suffered through in the past three years. Bad as in curl up in a fetal position on the couch and not bothering to change the TV channel when ‘Divorce Court’ came on. And medicating with brandy. Lots of brandy.

          • The Librarian

            Nothing worse than tooth pain in my view.

    • Alan

      That’s why I don’t own rental property. That’s okay, you don’t have to pay. Same reason I’m not allowed to manage other people. Take a two hour lunch, stay home on Friday, come in when you feel like it.

  • MynameisBlarney
    • Ghenghis McCann
      • SeeTrain65

        OBEY THE SIGNS!

        Don’t be like Lars Ulrich here.

    • Nockular cavity

      Oh, I’ve seen this 3 Stooges episode before.

    • specialcircumstances

      it’s probably an artifact of the gawker era. there was a well known troll with a penchant for tomatoes/using a tomato reference as his alias.

    • kaydenpat

      What exactly will those tomatoes do to you? I’m curious too.

    • Alan
    • Peripatetic Poltroon

      Maybe it’s screenshot from Attack of the Killer Tomatoes?

    • Shibusa

      Looks like somebody is throwing nightshade.

    • SeeTrain65

      Stay away from that place. I beg of you.

      I know what I’m talking about. My hometown holds its annual “Tomato Show” for four days starting the Wednesday after Labor Day, which means the streets are usually blocked for over a week. I evacuate happily the day before.

      To be honest, now that I look closely and see the utility poles and houses in the background, I think this actually might be my hometown. It’s the same kind of cutesy humor I find that hides the village’s perfidy and closeted racism.

  • Me not sure

    The Kushner’s are slumlords pure and simple. Their properties are known for ruthlessly prosecuting their tenants and providing as little in the way of upkeep and repairs as possible.
    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/05/23/magazine/jared-kushners-other-real-estate-empire.html

    • Ghenghis McCann

      A perfect fit with the Trumps.

      • Me not sure

        Plus Daddy was found guilty on 18 counts of tax evasion. They are not good people dispite their claims of being “strictly observant” in their religion.

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          To be fair, the bit about “rendering unto Caesar” is a recent variation that not everybody subscribes to.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      My landlord effectively owns about 25% of our little city. While they have many creative ways in which to gouge their tenants($40.00 a monthly “pet rent” really? “We use it to pay for things like the dog park”. Well my elderly Senile Cat doesn’t use it), but they have figured out that happy tenants are good and stable tenants.

  • MynameisBlarney

    Relax everyone, it could be moar worster.

    http://i.imgur.com/iAHotvQ.png

    • georgiaburning

      Fieri might be OK, but Bobby Flay scares me

      • SadDemInTex

        Yeah…how did a chef have a last name of flay! Wonder what his ancestors did in the wars?

      • Ms.Moon

        You should be fine if you don’t marry him.

        • SeeTrain65

          Just ask Stephanie March.

    • Fartknocker

      Fieri is a douchebag but thanks to my mute button it’s not a problem. Nancy Grace on the hand is an evil, obnoxious, nasty ass bitch.

      • Sophia

        She talks like everything is a major drama. Probably announces she’s going to the bathroom as if a nuclear war started. Get’s on my nerves.

        • The Librarian

          She deposits nuclear waste.

    • phoenix00

      I would take Presidente Fieri de Cuba!

  • The Librarian

    Kushners and the like have empathy modules that upchucked and died, if they ever existed. I had a ding on my credit report (courtesy of ex hub) which I paid. Collection co. sent pay or die letters. When I proved I’d paid, they agreed, but they wouldn’t remove it, and kept at me. I had the wherewithal to finally get it expunged, but many don’t and get caught in an ugly vicious cycle.

    • kareemachan

      I do remember somebody who something very similar to this happened to, and he managed to sue the shit out of the business. Yeah, I know it would probably cost more than it’s worth, but…

      • The Librarian

        That would have been my next step. I contacted Experian, sent documentation and they took care of it, with the caveat that I’d sue the collection company off the planet if they didn’t comply.

    • Steve Cole

      There really should be legislation to force the credit reporting companies to validate their records. I was amazed at some of the fiction on my credit report when I bought my house, and of course I had to refute each issue.

      • The Librarian

        They need the banhammer if they don’t do the right thing.

  • Nockular cavity
  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Maryland Attorney General Brian Frosh says that judges may issue the orders on insufficient evidence, like a landlord’s assertions, without written records, about debts and attempts at collection.

    I…just…what? Who can even pretend that this is fair FFS?

    • kareemachan

      Could they sue the landlord?

  • Skwerl the Nazi Puncher

    Forgive us our debts as we throw our debtors in jail….

    • kaydenpat

      The Bible According to Trump.

      • kareemachan

        But the Kush is ever so Jewish, so he can ignore this, right?

        ETA: This is not a generalized condemnation of Jews, just this asshat.

        • kaydenpat

          How he can tolerate Trump’s wink wink at Nazis and anti-Semitism is beyond me.

          • Being an utter sociopath would explain it.

          • Permit-holder Ron

            <ka-ching> is usually sufficient, for anyone in the Trumposphere.

  • Ellie

    Awww…isn’t that sweet. Ivanka married a man just like her dear old dad.

  • kaydenpat

    Not surprised at all that Jared is such a douche nozzle. Anyone remotely connected to Trump is one.

  • Sophia

    I read this a while back. Tells you exactly what Jared is like. It’s a long read but it’s interesting and well worth the time.
    The Beleaguered Tenants of ‘Kushnerville’

    Tenants in more than a dozen Baltimore-area rental complexes complain about a property owner who they say leaves their homes in disrepair, humiliates late-paying renters and often sues them when they try to move out. Few of them know that their landlord is the president’s son-in-law.

    https://www.propublica.org/article/the-beleaguered-tenants-of-kushnerville

  • SadDemInTex

    I was a renter for my entire life until 2004. My last landlords (it was a family business) lived across the street from me and a few houses down. They were/are the best landlords in Dallas. They rarely (very rarely) got tenants who got in arrears. They carefully vetted your finances and are very canny judges of character. I rented from them for over 10 years and in all that time they never had to throw someone out for lack of rent. And they never raised your rent if they thought you were a good person who was skating the thin edge of the wedge financially. (I remember my neighbors at the time told me they paid every two weeks instead of once a month….that’s how close to the edge they were). If something went wrong in your place they are there (in the middle of the night my hot water heater broke…my landlord got out of bed and helped me clean up the water and I had a new heater within 36 hours.

    • Permit-holder Ron

      Those aren’t landlords, those are goddamned SAINTS, compared to the rest.

  • Les Appentis De la résistance

    Jared can’t be running around trying to collect rent. He’s busy bringing peace to the Middle East.

  • Andrea Karim

    The Trump family has Great Expectations for our country.

    • Peripatetic Poltroon

      Let them eat Miss Havisham’s cake.

    • Shibusa

      They’re counting on the Bleak House of Representatives to help.

  • JackLinks

    Contact H Wayne Norman “attorney of record for Kushners slumlords” at the following!
    https://www.facebook.com/wayne.Senator

  • Jail or bankruptcy. This fucking country. Anyone check to see if the jails are for proffit and if the landlords own stock in them?

    • gallbladder

      I would wager “yes” in more than a few instances.

    • Naytch

      “The law, in its majestic equality, forbids rich and poor alike to sleep under bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal their bread.” – Anatole France

  • And to think, the media portrayed this creep and his awful wife as ‘moderating influences’ on the orange ogre… what evidence did they base this assertion on?

    • Bitter Scribe

      To be fair, this policy was probably put in place by the old man, and Jared just went along. Gee, that sounds familiar somehow, doesn’t it?

  • Deborah Ujevich

    I feel constrained to point out that neither the state nor the municipalities in which these incarcerations are occurring are benefiting fiscally from the costs associated with said incarcerations. And of course, as mentioned, the all but certain job loss resulting from incarceration & add’l (probably) court appearances. One more way to further marginalize this irrelevant segment of the tax base, for JUSTICE.

    • There’s a difference, of course, between local governments coming out ahead and the people who make these decisions coming out ahead.

      But for some folks, punishing the poor for being poor is sufficient. I swear, many decisions are made which only make sense if that is indeed a motive for a lot of people.

  • Kooolest G

    “If you don’t have the money you have to stay in jail until you pay,”

    how are you supposed to get the money if you’re in jail? seems like a life sentence for the poorz

    • El Howard

      Agreed, jailing people until they pay sounds like an extremely stupid and vindictive strategy, especially given that attaching their wages is an alternative. If they don’t have any wages to attach, perhaps you should just accept the reality that you ain’t gettin’ paid, Jack!

    • Duh. Just cash in some of your stocks. Or perhaps have one of your people arrange for a loan with your mountain cabin as collateral.

      • MilwaukeeKent

        Surely you aren’t suggesting doing something rash, like canceling a ski weekend in Vail? The very idea is simply outrageous!

  • katkelly57

    Jared Kushner, aka Slumlord Millionaire.

  • El Howard

    This, my friends, is _exactly_ why I’m not rich. I’m not a big enough a-hole to do stuff like this. I rented my house out to people at below market value, and let them go several months without paying rent in return for them making improvements on the house.

  • whitroth

    Well, gee, if Norman represents landlords, shouldn’t he have recused himself? I need to contact my state Senators and ask them this question.

    And about debt collection agencies that buy debt, and then the victim doesn’t know what this is about… I begin for find serious sympathy with the French solution of around 1790….

    Case in point: in ’95, my late wife and I had bought a house via a “mortgage generator”, who sold the mortgage in time for closing. Next year, early in the year, the mortgage was sold again. Then, later in the year, about to leave on vacation, we got this bill for $2300 dollars for “hazard insurance” on our house*. I called the mortgage company, and asked WTF? I was told, and I quote, not paraphrase, “We tried to contact you to get your insurance information. You might have thought that it was junk mail, since it wasn’t under our letterhead, but under the heading of our insurance partner, Prudential.”

    At this point my voice rose: IN THAT CASE, YOU DID NOT TRY TO CONTACT ME.” This was followed, before and after the vacation, by me SCREAMING at two different mortgage companies, all incompetents. I wound up having to escalate to a second level manager in one, and a third level manager in the other, before the got it fixed.

    * Wonketteers, if you are buying a house, DO. NO. *E*V*E*R*. allow the mortgage company to buy insurance for you, because YOU are NOT insured, only they are. House burns down, you get nothing whatsoever. Buy your own.

  • BearLeft

    Very unfair to Jared Kushner and all the hard work he’s accomplished balancing the silver spoon in his mouth while ramming his nose up trump’s ass, work that goes to show once again that the difference between ass-kissing and brown-nosing is depth perception.

  • Celtic_Gnome

    “The law? The law beats a man down here same as Georgia!”

  • Zyxomma

    I read this yesterday in the Sun, and was so outraged I shared it. Glad to see it here, Dok.

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