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They both seem nice.

Did you know it’s possible for you to abandon your godless, sinful Nazi lifestyle? IT’S TRUE! You might not feel like you chose to be this way. After all, you always felt different from the other non-Nazi boys. While they were off romping and rough-housing in the backyard, you were locked in your room reading the copy of Mein Kampf an older Nazi man slipped you when your parents weren’t looking, and before you knew it you just couldn’t stop spontaneously hating every Jew you saw, and now you’ve been fired from the Big Lots because your boss saw you carrying a tiki torch in Charlottesville. Is there hope for somebody like you?

Yes! There is literally an ex-Nazi organization called Life After Hate, and it helps neo-Nazis afflicted with irrational hatred see the light and start living as God intended. Now, this might sound a bit like those charlatan “ex-gay” programs, but the one big difference is that YOU WERE NOT FUCKING BORN A NAZI, therefore you definitely can and should change, YOU DICK.

Also? Gays are cool, unlike Nazis, who all need to fuck off.

Would it knock you right off your chair to learn that the Trump administration got rid of all kinds of pesky funding for Life After Hate earlier this summer, and that the effort was led by none other than Katharine Gorka, wife of Trump Nazi adviser Sebastian Gorka?

Huffington Post with some background:

Weeks before a violent white supremacist rally in Charlottesville, Virginia, led to three deaths and 19 injuries, the Trump administration revoked a grant to Life After Hate, a group that works to de-radicalize neo-Nazis.

The Department of Homeland Security had awarded the group $400,000 as part of its Countering Violent Extremism program in January, just days before former President Barack Obama left office. It was the only group selected for a grant that focused exclusively on fighting white supremacy. But the grant money was not immediately disbursed.

As HuffPost explains, Katharine Gorka was working on killing this funding as far back as the Trump transition. She met the guy at Homeland who ran the Countering Violent Extremism program, George Selim (who has now resigned for some reason), and explained that the only real kind of extremism is the Radical ‘Slamic kind, therefore why fund something silly like a program to make Nazis human again? (By the way, right-wing extremists of all sorts are a greater threat to Americans, BY FAR, than ISIS.)

Katharine Gorka is a lot like her husband, who calls her “Katie.” They both wrote at Breitbart, home of the “alt-right” neo-Nazi white supremacist movement, and they’re both connected to the Hungarian Nazi Vitezi Rend organization. Also too, HuffPost notes that, though they both think they are big important experts on foreign policy stuff, “mainstream national security experts are either unfamiliar with or critical of their work.” One difference between them, though, is that we can’t find any evidence of Katie Gorka getting a fake PhD from an online Hungarian clown college like her husband Doctor Gorka (do not ever call him that) did.

But they really enjoy hating Muslims together. It is their date night couple thing! You think we’re fucking around, but Gorka actually said this in a talk at the David Horowitz Freedom Center just after the 2016 election:

I eat, drink and sleep this stuff. My wife, Katie, is an expert on Jihad as well. Our pillow talk is the Islamic State and  Al-Qaeda.

Ven an Alpha Male loves a voman very very much, zey take off zeir clothes! And he vhispers sveet nothings in her mouth about radical Islamic terrorism, and zen after zat, he makes intercourse to her, because zee era of zee pajama boy is over, IN HIS PANTS!

Jesus Christ, these fuckers are weird.

We know we’re always shaking you down for donations for Wonkette, but this time, we’re going to shake you down for Life After Hate. There’s a campaign to recover that $400K in lost funding, because fuck Donald Trump and fuck these Gorka motherfuckers and fuck Nazis. As of this writing, they’ve raised almost 60K, so go help ’em out. Here’s a bit more on what they do, to get you extry motivated:

Life After Hate provides direct service to individuals who want to leave behind their lives of racism and violent extremism. The organization trains and supports former hate group members as mentors and educators who de-radicalize and disengage potential violent extremists. In recent months, the organization has experienced a remarkable increase in phone calls and emails concerning the intensification and spread of hate speech and hate crimes stemming from the alt-right movement in the United States. […]

Sammy Rangel, executive director of Life After Hate explained, “The funding is for the crisis intervention initiatives that help pull violent extremists out of their lifestyles across the United States. This direct service assists people in resisting violent urges, and provides resources to anyone questioning racist ideologies. Our actions are saving lives.”

We can’t imagine how an organization like that might help prevent the next Charlottesville, oh wait yes the fuck we can.

If you need EVEN MORE extry motivation to help out, watch this video of Sebastian Gorka declaring the era of the pajama boy to be over, and when you’re done laughing, open your wallet.

Wonkette salaries are fully funded by lovely souls like you! If you love us, click below to pay us those salaries!

[Huffington Post / Life After Hate / Public Good fundraiser for Life After Hate]

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  • TJ Barke

    OFFS…

  • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos
  • Ωbjectifier

    Snazzy tunic.

  • therblig

    “Fuck me like one of your muslim girls.” – Katie Gorka (probably)

  • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

    i’m halfway through the article and I second TJ’s, Oh FFS.

    • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

      p.s. – WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK?

      “I eat, drink and sleep this stuff. My wife, Katie, is an expert on Jihad as well. Our pillow talk is the Islamic State and Al-Qaeda.”

      • monoglot

        To be fair, were you married to either of them, wouldn’t you prefer that type of pillow talk to anything that might lead to anything racier?

        • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

          if i was married to either of them, I think i’d prefer cyanide.

          • monoglot

            Or maybe reinterpret “pillow talk” as insisting one only talk with a pillow pressed firmly against the face..?

  • KKKatie

  • Is this the part where Old Yeller dies?
    http://i.imgur.com/LwBs0am.gif

  • memzilla Ω
    • (((fka_donnie_d)))

      Fuck that, put them in locked cages the way they do with spray paint to deter black graffiti hooligans.

    • ArgieBargie
      • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

        oh fuck that…

        cilantro is good on everything (and I’m pretty sure is an ingredient in decent guacamole).

        • Major_Major_Major

          I like cilantro. It tastes like soap to Mrs_M^3. Some genetic BS.

          • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

            <..>

            Are you sure she’s not a repitilian alien?

        • ArgieBargie

          That’s the joke. Only Nazis would protest cilantro.

        • foiled again

          For some of us, the C-word is simply awful. Cilantro, Joy dishwashing liquid, same thing. The absolute worst thing I’ve ever put in my piehole is cilantro pesto- I felt like washing my mouth out with acetone.

          See also: beets and black licorice. Yeeeg.

          • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

            blasphemy!
            I don’t get this dish soap thing though? Is this really a thing?

            but pesto can be a bit much- i’ve learned a little goes a long way.

          • foiled again

            I know, I’m an apostate, but the soap thing really is a thing- I believed I would be blowing bubbles from my mouth-hole subsequent to cilantro intake. It is that intense. As in, SOMEONE IS TRYING TO POISON ME FOR LAFFS.
            But what I tell folkses at the table is true- more cilantro for everyone else!

          • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

            oye…and cilantro is fairly mild.

            You poor man/woman.

          • foiled again

            Today I’m a man playing a woman playing a man. Tomorrow it will be the opposite.

          • Ill-Advised

            I’m with you on the beets and black licorice.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      Steve finds a niche….

  • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

    FWIW – I spotted this last night (still haven’t slept):

    Gorka appeared on Breitbart News Daily, the radio show of his former employer. Gorka responded to criticism stemming from a previous media appearance on MSNBC where he said “[t]here’s no such thing as a lone wolf” attack. The concept, according to Gorka, was “invented by the last administration to make Americans stupid.”

    The idea of a “lone wolf attack,” Gorka says, is a ruse to point blame away from al Qaeda and ISIS when “[t]here has never been a serious attack or a serious plot that was unconnected from ISIS or al Qaeda.”

    “On Wednesday, Gorka lashed out at “at [New York Times reporter] Maggie Haberman and her acolytes in the fake news media, who immediately have a conniption fit” and brought up McVeigh. He added that “white men” and “white supremacists” are not “the problem.”

    It’s this constant, “Oh, it’s the white man. It’s the white supremacists. That’s the problem.” No, it isn’t, Maggie Haberman. Go to Sinjar. Go to the Middle East, and tell me what the real problem is today. Go to Manchester.”

    http://digbysblog.blogspot.com/2017/08/white-men-cant-be-terrorists.html

    • That’s white exceptionalism… only the dusky hordes are collectivists!!!

    • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

      I’d like to tell Gorka where to go. It smells of brimstone and sulphur, and he may want to pack light as it’s powerful warm there.

      • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

        i’m pretty sure that’s within the commenting rules, but you may want to consult an attorney.

        ; P

    • Carpe Vagenda

      It seems ungrateful for Gorka to be mean to Maggie Haberman, who wrote the Ron Howard voiceover for his personal anschluss. He owes her so much.

    • MynameisBlarney

      Gorka needs to fuck off back to his own goddamned country.

  • I must say, Pajama Boy really inhabits their heads. It’s been years after that ad came out, and they still talk about it. I bet they all have weird fantasies about him banging their wives and then making cocoa for everybody.

    • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

      what do we call a reverse cuck?

  • Relativicus

    What is “an expert on Jihad”?

  • therblig
  • Carpe Vagenda

    bringing a whole new meaning to the words “climate denier”, Bret Stephens has announced that if you’re white you can’t be a terrorist unless you had a really awesome childhood.

    https://twitter.com/gabedelahaye/status/897508687173926912

    • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

      regarding #2 – there’s a bunch of people currently in prison or with criminal records OR ON FUCKING DEATH ROW who would like to talk with you.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Not to mention that the kid received monthly SS checks his entire life until age eighteen and then got a bequest from his father’s will at 18.

        Under this standard, pretty much the entire middle east outside the ruling class is defined out of terrorism.

        • jesterpunk

          Paul Ryan?

          • Carpe Vagenda

            Disaffected fatherless Tennessee youth turns to mass murder…

    • WotsAllThisThen

      The alt-right is only “mostly racist.” If it was all racist, that’s a different story.

      • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

        “he’s only mostly a serial murderer”

        • Major_Major_Major

          It’s not serial killing if you can limit yourself to just one or two every few years.

          • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

            “ahem” – the FBI.

    • Major_Major_Major

      And who, pray tell, is this fuckwit? The same chucklehead that was all about science denying?

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Yeah, the global warming troll they hired from the WSJ.

        • Major_Major_Major

          What I figured. Gottta up the old buffoon quotient, NYT?

          • Latverian Diplomat

            “Krugman’s been on fire lately, quick, hire another conservative for ‘balance'”
            — The Fucking New York Times

    • MynameisBlarney

      And Mr. Stephens can go and fornicate himself.

      • Les Appentis De la résistance

        He can fornicate the hornets nest attached to my garage.

        • MynameisBlarney

          Kinky!

        • Carpe Vagenda

          Individually or en masse?

    • jesterpunk

      For number 4: These are the same assholes who want all Muslims to denounce every terrorist attack committed by a Muslim. They also demand other minority groups respond and apologize for every action.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        and of course the conditions they grew up in are irrelevant.

    • Les Appentis De la résistance

      This isn’t a satirical SNL copy? Jesus, white people are embarassing.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        People who are white professionally or as a hobby are embarassing.

    • OrG in London

      It’s not responsibility I feel. It’s embarrassment.

    • Red Bird

      Jesus. He thinks he’s being clever but he’s basically using the same excuses they ALWAYS use to defend this type of violence. ALWAYS. It’s never their fault.

      • (((fka_donnie_d)))

        The Buck Stops… SQUIRREL!

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I like to think that somewhere William F Buckley is going to spend eternity frantically trying to explain all this to the God he claimed to speak for in a clever enough way to make it OK.

        • Red Bird

          What makes you think he’s talking to God?

          • Carpe Vagenda

            I’m sure if he’s out there he’s talking to God real fast. I’m just not sure the bus runs to where he is now.

    • (((fka_donnie_d)))

      Motherfucker from National Review was on MSNBC (because that’s REALLY who we need to hear from, right this fucking second, and besides it’s not a real condemnation of Nazis unless it’s a conservative condemnation). Started explaining in excruciating detail how Bannon was in bed with the alt-right but Miller had nothing to do with them.

      Bitch, at this point if you drank from the same water fountain as one of these motherfuckers and haven’t publicly condemned them yet, you belong in white sheets with the rest of them.

    • NastyBossetti

      Is there some reason being “fatherless” and “troubled” mean you can’t ALSO be a domestic terrorist?

      • Carpe Vagenda

        As I recall, the popular talking point on the WSJ editorial board was that being fatherless and troubled led to domestic terrorism, which is why everyone needs to be armed for skittles.

    • Shibusa

      I wonder how Bret would respond to a post saying virtually the same thing about Omar Mateen or Syed Rizwan Farook.

  • MynameisBlarney
    • Cosmopolitan John

      Bravely brave Sir Robin ran away 🎶

    • writersbloc

      It’s almost like being a violently suppressed minority sucks?

    • OrG in London

      Uh oh. DUDE, you’re FAMOUS. HAHA!

  • JMP

    I just can’t even; I mean, so many fucking Nazis have taken America’s government, how are we supposed to cope with that without drinking ourselves into an early grave?

  • WotsAllThisThen

    I’m keeping the age of pajama boy alive, every night and some weekend mornings.

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    Basket, meet deplorables.

  • ArgieBargie

    I’m beginning to think there was a reason why Trump didn’t immediately disavow the Charlottesville Nazis.

    He was waiting for Gorka, Bannon and Miller to return from the rally.

    • sgt. jmk of the résistance

      In my daily tweet at Gorka yesterday, I asked him if it was hard to get the tiki torch oil smell out of his hair.

    • Shibusa

      Here’s Sebastian, primed for peaceful protest.
      https://radio.foxnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/11/gorka2.jpg

      • Paul

        How insecure do you have to be to pose with a gun? Especially when it doesn’t even belong to you? What a fucking dangerous overcompensating asshole. And he’s got the ear of the king of all the dangerous overcompensating assholes. This is frightening as fuck.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

    So there are some Nazi women. About what? 1 for every 892 Nazis?

    • Covfefe

      Letting women in the infantry was a slippery slope.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Their ober-fuhrer told them “random women will want to have sex with you”. I guess that’s as close to 70 virgins as these untermensch get.

    • Bananas Foster

      And they all have the same last name.

  • armed_bears

    I particularly enjoy the Sgt. Deplorable’s Lonely Hearts Club uniform.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ef0d3e249591e3ac670a8ca0c455b84cfd27a04c0f2b146f9b1d7455a04d61a6.jpg

    • laughingnome

      It was 80 years ago today
      Corporal Hitler taught the band to play…

      • armed_bears

        I guess the walrus was… Bannon?

        • laughingnome

          The girth is a dead giveaway.

        • Querolous

          I think it was some guy from Joisey.

    • Howard Samuelsohn

      Excellent!

  • Les Appentis De la résistance

    Zis is how you zuck the govmint teet in ze Trump era. $155k of ze taxpayerz moneyz feed zese petulent slugs.

  • John Iwaniszek

    He’s in a heterosexual relationship?!

    • Major_Major_Major

      Allegedly. I never knew that replicants were monogamous.

    • He’s also getting it on the downlow from a Pajama Boy lookalike.

      The safe word is “caliphate”.

  • Joe Beese

    I could watch that Gorka video. I could also slam my car door on my hand to the rhythm of “The Macarena”.

    • MynameisBlarney

      I could watch that Gorka video. I could also shove a red hot poker in my eye.

    • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

      honestly, best chuckle i’ve had in days.

    • P’jama Pahnts

      I’d rather shave my head with a cheesegrater

      • OutOfOrbit

        purdy sure that would leave marks

      • Shibusa

        …While chewing on tin foil.

        • P’jama Pahnts

          And jogging behind a bus

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Watching the video would be worse
      https://youtu.be/gwWRjvwlLKg

      • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

        oh fuck that shit – I LIVED through it.

      • MynameisBlarney

        Damn you!
        Damn you straight to Hell!

      • MynameisBlarney

        I can’t believe that song was as popular as it was.

        It was fucking shit.

        • Gee, Your Hair Smells Horrific

          No it wasn’t!
          Well . . . okay, it was.

        • Major_Major_Major

          It was the first broken seal of the pending Trumpacolypse.

        • UncleTravelingMatt

          There were a lot of awful things going on then. This. Barbie Girl. That Hanson song. Shania Twain. It’s no wonder I drink.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          It helped to be associated with a “dance” that even the lamest white folks could learn.

          • MynameisBlarney

            No.
            No they couldn’t.
            I witnessed many, MANY failed attempts.

      • sg77

        I like it. So sue me. Look at all the beautiful people. The opposite of Nazis. Plus it’s totally danceable.

  • spangled

    women can be nazis and nazi collaborators too!
    equality!

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “Tolerance is hard!”
      — Stormtrooper Barbie

  • Bananas Foster

    When I look at that picture, the first thought that runs through my mind is, “I’m surprised *he* doesn’t dye *his* hair blond.”

    (And wear blue contacts. If you wanna play Nazi, might as well go all in…)

    Then, of course, I’m like, wtf is up with that jacket(?), sir?!

    I do believe those kinds of buttons are most commonly seen on Asian clothing…

  • bookish

    AltEPA Retweeted
    Dan Diamond ✔ @ddiamond
    With today’s exits, here’s an updated list of members of Trump’s manufacturing council.

    View image on Twitter

    https://mobile.twitter.com/ddiamond/status/897492214665949185

  • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

    Seriously, ‘Bastion Gorka Park, what the holy fuck is a ‘pajama boy’?

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Just think projection. It’s everything about himself that he despises

    • Mr. Blobfish
      • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

        These used to be called fucking underwear (or longjohns) back in the high and mighty “OLe days” these people preach about.

        Ye gods.

      • Nockular cavity

        For some unfathomable reason, the Kultur Warriors had a serious conniption fit over stock-photo guy there. I’m not joking.

      • NastyBossetti

        Seriously? This is where that comes from?

  • Mr. Blobfish

    They’re not SuperNazis. They’re HyperNazis.

    • OutOfOrbit

      not little snazis

      • weejee

        or nutzis?

        • Jon Sussex

          or derplorables?

    • george lastrapes

      They are Deep Lorables, natural enemies (and prey?) of Deep State.

  • Gee, Your Hair Smells Horrific

    Imagine having to listen to the voice of your husband, Sebastian Gorka, telling you HE DID TOO fucking cleaned the kitty litter box just yesterday, and actually, do you know how lucky you truly are to be married to a Hungarian Neo-Nazi alpha male with access to . . . the president of the United States???
    Ha ha! Serves her right.

    • The KGB Ate Our Votes

      It’s hard to actually make out anything he says in his thick fake accent underneath the nasally superiority and the dripping condescension. I suppose he can drop the fakery at home, where maybe he actually sounds like pajama boy Jared Kushner.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      And we need to get a Dem President in office ASAP and demand that they take out the trash.

      • The KGB Ate Our Votes

        Take out the Euro-trash

  • Crystalclear12

    This what happens when there isn’t a tight lid on the basket.

    • weejee

      The basket cases run derp in tRumpian Amerika.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      In retrospect “basket” was really too nice. Baskets are for flowers, fruit, kittens, and puppies. It’s becoming clear that “bucket” would have been a better word

      • yyyaz

        Or shitcan.

      • Edith Prickly

        “Stinking cesspool.”

  • laughingnome

    These people make me a little nauseous. Thanks, Comey.

  • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

    I’m calling it. For Miss Gorka.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LuGgEcE3sIQ

  • laughingnome

    Hungarian Nazis. It’s all the paprika.

    • lowenufc

      Ooohhh… I like paprika.
      Hungarian Nazis, not so much.

    • Jennifer R

      He is a British Nazi really, Hungary almost didn’t even let him into the country.

      • laughingnome

        British Nazis. I got nothing.

  • The KGB Ate Our Votes

    Mrs. Gorka….with apologize to my love, Madeline.

    .

    https://youtu.be/Uai7M4RpoLU

  • Bad Scooter

    I just donated to Life After Hate (must credit Wonkette 😁).

    • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

      good on ya!

  • Red Bird

    Good.
    Also, alpha male is just another way of saying openly racist white men.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Well, technically alpha males are simians from further down the evolutionary scale.

      • Red Bird

        Well they like to claim they’re action on basic human instinct.

    • phoenix00

      Also: openly misogynist, if that wasn’t obvious.

  • ManchuCandidate

    Here’s a song about Seb and Kathy.
    Two alt right fucks fucking up the American right land.
    Seb he’s gonna be a White House Staffer
    Kathy messes up the DHS.

    • Steven R Freedman

      It didn’t rhyme. Even a little bit.

  • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

    Someone needs to gift them their own, monogrammed monocles. It’ll complete the look.

  • laughingnome

    Have they, uh, reproduced?

    • The KGB Ate Our Votes

      Google says ‘no’. Well, I’ll drink to that!

  • TundraGrifter

    Looks like he stopped to pose with his wife on his way to marching band practice.

    • jodyleek

      This one time…at Nazi band camp…

  • Panika MCD

    the era of the Alpha Male is over and the Stolichnaya is back:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yTLw_5-epo

    • TundraGrifter

      “Alpha Male” is shorthand for “A complete asshat and proud of it.”

  • Alan

    For some reason I’m still a little surprised that women can be such assholes.

    • cheetojeebus

      Seems to be a pretty deep prejudice most carry. That extra X chromosome doesn’t inoculate one from stupid etc. BTW It’s even more intense if the women is attractive. Thing is the object of it can suffer a harsher judgement from society if they fall from this fictive higher status.

  • rocktonsam

    maybe the FBI could visit these 2 before dawn some morning…
    they’d probably be up anyway shoving burning sticks up each other’s ass.
    devils.

  • georgiaburning

    Can’t fool me, Gorka is Baghdad Bob with a beard. Two beards if you include Katherine

    • Janejstanley

      Play73d

      Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! :!aj163d:
      On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
      :!aj163d:
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    • Uncle Mark

      I can’t help but chuckle….watching these Nazis pound their chests, calling themselves “Alpha Males,” and yet they seldom can find a non-inflatable woman to even date them.

  • TundraGrifter

    “…we can’t find any evidence of Katie Gorka getting a fake PhD from an online Hungarian clown college like her husband Doctor Gorka…”

    Too lazy to start their own certifying board, like Dr. Rand Paul?

  • Anna Rompage

    Can we just cut the crap and start referring to our Deal Leader as Duh Fuehrerfluffer?

    I mean serious, this guy has packed his admin with more semi educated white power nazis than I even knew existed in the US…

    • ghastly_fop

      A duffer on the course, a fluffer in the Kremlin

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        So, Fuehrerdufferfluffer, then?…

        • commatoes

          Swedish chef is gonna sue you for copyright.

  • Mavenmaven

    Didn’t those “alpha males” get their butts kicked this past weekend?

  • Cool_North

    Who the hell do these mofos think they are, and how did they get to have any influence at all? It’s like there’s not one single legitimate human being there.

    • Cool_North

      Also, in a nutshell obssessive nuts.
      ““Ven an Alpha Male loves a voman very very much, zey take off zeir clothes! And he vhispers sveet nothings in her mouth about radical Islamic terrorism, and zen after zat, he makes intercourse to her, because zee era of zee pajama boy is over, IN HIS PANTS!””

      • commatoes

        And zee clock which vas at 8:00 vill now read 8:02. And zee voman shall go back to filing her nails.

        • phoenix00

          Two minutes? That sounds awfully dragged out.

  • The Flaming Carrot

    Now is the time on Schprockets ven ve danse!
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QHZR9SA5pOg

  • cheetojeebus

    Gettin’ mighty fed up with volks who claim not to be nazis when they clearly are. “This flag on my front porch is an ancient celtic symbol” , bullshit. “Oh, this flag? why it’s a symbol of southern heritage..” Bullshit. Stand up for what you believe in so we can thoroughly ridicule you for your fucking hateful retrograde worldview you fucking bags of liquid shit.

    • The Flaming Carrot

      The trouble with those Nazi uniforms is that at some point they have to take them off.

      • Zyxomma

        Ew.

  • JParkerSD46

    What an arrogant, pompous, self-absorbed poser. Fake degrees, fake medals, fake accent, very real douchery and nazism. I’m having a tough time keeping my list of punchable faces under control because idiots like Dorka keep opening their pie holes. And WTF is a “pajama boy”?

  • Candy Matson Y-28209

    Oof. Happy to help an organization that’s trying to keep normal, everyday people from getting too sucked in to that nightmare swamp world. It’s hard to believe people could abandon their core values so easily, but I understand the seduction of online rage. Sobering.

  • Oblios_Cap

    Why, yes, I do believe the bible is filled with lies. Why should it be any different than our history books?

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. That jacket G-Nazi is wearing is identical to the one my kid wore on stage for her tap dance solo to a Fall Out Boy song. Way to masculine it up, pajama boy.

    • GunToting[Redacted]

      It looks like the jacket Joan Cusack wore in Grosse Point Blank, when her boss (brother) called her Sgt. Pepper.

      • Persistent Tennessee Rain

        Love, love, love that movie.

      • commatoes

        Somewhere out there, there is a kid dressing for marching band yelling, “OK, which one of you took my f**king jacket?”

  • Toomush_Inferesistance

    If Sebastian Gorka is an alpha male, I feel sorry for the females anywhere near him…

  • Indiepalin

    Well, as Jesus said in the Parable of the Blind Prostitute, “You really have to hand it to her.”

  • Walter Wellstone

    Alpha male? He wishes.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Ever notice that those who claim to be, never really are? Because if you’re so insecure that you need to brag about it, you aren’t, by definition.

      • commatoes

        I am reminded of a Bruce Campbell tv commercial. The implied subject is “cool”, but one of the lines is “If you want it, you don’t have it.”

      • Hardly Ideal

        Apologies for a nerd tangent, but a weird fantasy webcomic comes to mind. In that paradoxical pseudo-Buddhist setting, there’s the concept of Royalty, a kind of enlightenment gained from knowing God’s true name. But it’s weird, because those who don’t aspire for it achieve it with little effort, while those who clamor for it will never attain it.

        I dunno why, these Alpha bros make me think of that. Like, the more you struggle for Alpha royalty, the further you get from it. And besides, I always thought titles like “Alpha” or “patriot” or “hero” are mantles others put on you, not something you can add yourself.

        • Tiny kaiju

          The alt right strikes me as like the Thorn Knights. Arrogant, merciless and utterly unable to function without someone to direct their actions.

          • Hardly Ideal

            Same nihilistic burn-it-down attitude, too. And the tacky fashion sentiments.

          • Jeffery Campbell

            Thorn Knights? Is that like Mystic Knights of the Sea?

          • lurch394

            Holy mack’rel, Andy!

        • lurch394

          Yeah, kind of like Grace, Providence, mystical experience, and nirvana.

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    Il Douche isn’t pro-Nazi. He’s just, you know, anti-anti-Nazi.
    It’s obviously a policy of non-discrimination, when you look at it the (alt)right way.

    • commatoes

      I don’t think El Gordo knows what moral, ethics, or even ideology mean. His Daddy didn’t those degrees were worth paying for.

    • lurch394

      Antidisestablishmentarian? Of course.

  • HazooToo

    Rule of Thumb: Omegaverse excluded, anyone who uses the terms “Alpha, Beta, Omega” to refer to people is a JACKASS!!!

    • LucindathePook

      Or Aldous Huxley.

      • HazooToo

        Had NO idea who that was, so I googled. He sounds like he was pretty much not a Jackass. Exclusion accepted.

  • Edith Prickly

    I don’t want to watch that, can someone just tell me WTF a “pajama boy” is?

  • Iam Reading

    I wonder if Gorka will be crushed enough to commit suicide when Trump eventually throws him under the bus too.

  • commatoes

    They seem nice.

  • Hardly Ideal

    Our pillow talk is the Islamic State and Al-Qaeda.

    And I thought I was a freak… kinky back-rubs and shipping Warcraft characters is downright wholesome in comparison.

    • major_asshole

      Fucking hell, compared to that my BDSM playmates and pup play partners are vanilla as hell…

  • Lyly Sirivong

    Expert on Jihad… Yeah, right.

  • Ellie

    I am going to donate to Life After Hate, because if the Gorkas are against it, it’s a pretty good bed that I should be for it.

    But please, what is a “pajama boy?”

    • Pajama boy is from some ad where some guy was in pajamas. So therefore it means that society is trying to turn men into wimps or something.
      No really, all it is.

      • Ellie

        Thanks. It seems rather silly to me. I did Google, and it appears to be an ad talking about health insurance. So…Real Men don’t need to talk about health insurance?

        • Currency Manipulator

          Nope…if they get hurt they walk it off or rub some dirt on it.

        • TEX Dept. of Space Tacos

          not when they’re wearing jammies (that’s the rightwing line, the whole feminizaiton of men b.s.)

    • major_asshole

      I’m fairly certain “pajama boys” is some code word for Holocaust victims when someone can’t admit that the Holocaust happened or was as bad as it really fucking was.

    • lurch394

      It’s an anti-Obamacare slur: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pajama_Boy

      • Ellie

        So, I was right, and Real Men don’t worry about Health Care Coverage, because that’s wimpy.

  • WTF is a “pajama boy” anyway, it sounds fun. I threw $25 at them, because fuck the Gorkas, they are literal Nazis. I hope they make 1,000% of their funding goal–more than they would have gotten in federal funds.

  • diogenez

    They seem nice.

  • JoeChristmas

    Finally, Eva Braun’s ghost has reemerged.

    • Hizzoner

      Has she put on weight?

  • Jeff Mc Donald

    This doesn’t seem right. Isn’t this the flag waving crowd? I mean we had a war about Nazism. It was in the papers and everything! Some history books still have it in there too.

    • Jeffery Campbell

      “Some history books still have it in there too.”
      – …for now. s/ Betsy DeVos.

  • Begin Anew Day

    “… their date night couple thing!”

    Here I am struggling with the grief of my beloved spouse passing from the torments of cancer and these two turds float in the trump toilet bowl, oblivious to anything that really matters. They coo at each other over HATE!

    FYI my beloved Maureen knew I was The One when I asked her out to dinner and we stopped by a bookstore too!

    • major_asshole

      Please accept my condolences on your wife’s passing. I’ve seen what cancer can do, and it is a horrible disease no matter what form it takes.

      (Also, on the subject of being the one, my boyfriend knew I was The One when I didn’t run screaming after he revealed his hobbies and interests! Yay!)

    • Zyxomma

      You have my deepest condolences. My brilliant Berkeley first cousin’s partner of over 45 years died in April of pancreatic cancer (they have two wonderful sons, but never married). He’s inconsolable, but going on with life as best he can. I hope you are, too. Hugs.

    • The Flaming Carrot

      I know, I know. These people should have their birth certificates revoked. I’m so sorry about your partner. Cancer is an absolute fucking bitch.

    • Jeffery Campbell

      I am so very sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you.

  • Zyxomma

    I hope it’s okay to crosspost, because this belongs here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A2_PMwOtA98

    and I also intend to post it on the open thread. It’s 1962’s Pressure Point, starring Sidney Poitier as a prison psychiatrist and Bobby Darin as the unrepentant nazi in prison for sedition, who’s his latest patient.

    • Currency Manipulator

      That sounds interesting, I’ll have to check it out.

  • Guest Liberal
  • sg77

    Dang how did these creeps get into the country let alone the White House.

  • mrf95

    Gorka has a wife? Who knew? I thought he sat at home at night polishing his medals and playing with his GI Adolph toys.

  • The Flaming Carrot

    They used to spend date night together plotting hate crimes against Romani people, but that got boring because there were more members of the Hungarian Guard than actual Romanis. Please tell me that these 2 have not procreated.

  • Jeffery Campbell

    Jesus H. Christ, that asshole again parading around like he is on his way to a Sound of Music Sing-a-long.

  • harryeagar

    He wore a Ruritanian playsuit to the inauguration? The wife looks like she’s dressed for the silent auction at the local shelter for abused animals.

    They’re beyond satire which, I suppose, is why Evan was reduced to pure invective.

    • Sarah E. Grove

      Yes, and a medal that belonged to his Papa that is from a Hungarian Nazi group. He’s IN our fucking White House! Along with drunken Nazi Bannon and Gollum Miller. This is hair-on-fire time for our country!

  • shocktreatment

    More than just another delusional, unqualified fuckwit nursing off of the public teat, Goctor Dorks is a fornicatin’ emblem for Trumpitude.

    “I mean who the fuck cares that (insert administration figure’s name and title) is an unqualified dolt, reviled by the public and an object of scorn for his peers. Never mind that he/she/it has never published a single thing in the field that wasn’t plagiarized…
    “He says nice things about the boss, he’s in!”

  • Mazey

    Hey I didn’t read it I just came here to make fun of you idiots! #idiots

    • SeeTrain65

      Be sure to read your feature this Sunday, Nazi fuckboi.

      • Mazey

        Nazi fuckboi lol. Let the hate flow through you

        • Tania

          Sweetie, darling you are beyond adorable. If we are idiots – what does that make someone coming to make fun of us? Surely there are better uses of your time – can I suggest macramé?

  • Sarah E. Grove

    Your “Donate” function is confusing (I’m an old lady, not all that ‘puter literate.) I think I just donated $25 (I tried to!) but didn’t receive and type of confirmation of it. I also donated $25 to Life after Hate organization.

    I hope you got the donation, Wonkette. Wish I could afford more. I love this site!

  • gingerland62

    I bet they do Hitler/Braun role play.

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