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The Winning never ends!

Better get your scorecards out, because there’s an all new round of White House Thunderdome underway! Trump yelling at Jeff Sessions is so last week of July — the new fight is National Security Adviser H.R. McMaster versus the foul spawn of Steve Bannon and Michael Flynn, McMaster’s predecessor. Wednesday, we looked at the weird wordvomit that got Bannon pal Rich Higgins fired from the National Security Council. Wednesday night, McMaster up and fired Ezra Cohen-Watnick, a young twerp Flynn brought to the NSC as senior director for intelligence programs. When Flynn was booted and McMaster took over the job, Cohen-Watnick — who was handling sensitive intelligence information at the tender age of 30, and was the guy Devin Nunes, “recused” shitweasel chair of the House Intelligence Committee, relied on in his heroic quest to give the White House secret intelligence he got from the White House about “unmasking” and “wire tapps” — was one of the first people McMaster wanted to get rid of, because the CIA reportedly couldn’t stand him. But Cohen-Watnick had the love of Steve Bannon and Jared Kushner to keep him warm, so he went to Trump and asked to be kept on, and the president overruled McMaster.

But dynamics, as they say, have shifted, and now Cohen-Watnick is the third Bannonista in three weeks to get shitcanned. The other, now former senior director for the Middle East Derek Harvey, got the boot last week. Harvey had earlier this year presented McMaster with a list of NSC “holdovers” from the Obama administration and insisted they be fired as “Deep State” adversaries of Trump, but McMaster said nah, no way.

Cohen-Watnick, a former low-level official at the Defense Intelligence Agency, was something of a mystery presence on the security council, but he made friends with Bannon, Flynn, and Kushner during the transition, and that was enough to buy him some protection, according to an article in The Atlantic that apparently got under McMaster’s skin because it portrayed him as unable to control his own NSC. Politico reports that McMaster had started getting along little better with Cohen-Watnick, but he was still annoyed at the headline calling the little twerp “The Man McMaster Couldn’t Fire,” so when he saw the chance to boot Cohen-Watnick, the boot was delivered, and the general was pleased.

Ah, but now, the wingnuts are gunning for McMaster for cleaning house of all their Breitbart heroes, because the only thing worse than Radical Islam or Democrats is a Republican turncoat who is insufficiently Trumpy. They’re especially angry with McMaster for his heretical view that it’s not really helpful to think shouting “Radical Islamic terrorism!” all the time is equivalent to actually fighting terrorism, and Laura Ingraham tweeted a link to a February New York Times article titled “H.R. McMaster Breaks With Administration on Views of Islam,” so that ought to stir up plenty of primal rage among Trump’s Online Flying Monkey Brigade.

Judging by the replies, it worked!

Other wingnuts are certain McMaster is a great big baddie, but they aren’t sure if he’s a dupe of Radical Islam or of The Jews. Maybe BOTH, because after all, the just-fired Higgins was perfectly happy saying Islamists, globalists, and Leftists were all in it together, so it only makes sense (to a disordered mind) that radical Islam and the Zionist international bankers are on the same side. Here’s Alex Jones love child Paul Joseph Watson retweeting a Breitbart story about McMaster’s love for Islamic radicalism and hatred of Israel:

Scary! He looks like Col. Kurtz! But here’s Mike Cernovich, the poor dear who’s been targeted for death by the ADL, linking to a website called “H.R. McMaster Leaks,” which ofers as a header this wacky cartoon of McMaster and David Petraeus as puppets controlled by George Soros, who is himself a puppet being controlled by a hand labeled “Rothschilds.” It’s all symbolic ‘n’ shit:

The image on the site has been trimmed to remove the ‘Rothschild’ part.
The wingnut frenzy over McMaster has now gone to Full Boiling Murder-Rage with a report that McMaster doesn’t think Barack Obama’s national security adviser, Susan Rice, did anything wrong in “unmasking” Americans’ names in NSA intelligence reports. Since it’s an article of wingnut faith that Rice is a traitor who did treason, this is the last straw and McMaster must be fired, at the very least, lest America be overrun by his radical jihadist allies before morning. Cernovich, who wishes he could quit Trump but can’t, reports the villagers are gathering pitchforks and torches for tonight’s Trump rally in West Virginia. Or at least paper:

These folks will not be happy until Trump rewards them with McMaster’s head. Or at least his scalp. Or some neck hair, maybe. It’s the Night Of The Long Sporks. But will H.R. McMaster’s be the next head to roll, or will Bannon be out, or will all this blow over when Putin releases the (ALLEGED!) Pee Tape? Stay tuned! We are through the white rabbit’s looking glass and into the Red Queen’s sticky wicket, people. The stupid just won’t stop.

Yr Wonkette is supported by reader donations. Please click the “Donate” linky below so we can help guide you through the coming purges.

[Politico / Atlantic / Weekly Standard / Atlantic]

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  • AppleJackie

    Are we well oiled-machining yet?

  • Beanz&Berryz

    I think one bushy eyebrow is as much scalp as they’re gonna get out of McMaster… And, just wow… The pot just keeps boiling… New day, a different sauce…

  • The RWNJ World is essentially fracturing over competence vs incompetence

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7396c395abff6aa42996e00d6db919c2a235728096faa44f945ad8fe4ae826b9.gif

    • WotsAllThisThen

      They already took a stand against competence last November. Now they’re just fighting over different flavors of stupid.

  • doktorzoom

    If you want to see Trump supporters losing their shit in real time, just do a Twitter search on “Trump McMaster” — Or use mine.

    • JMP

      But what about those of us who don’t do Twitter?

      • The Wanderer

        Personally, I consider myself blessed.

      • doktorzoom

        Longer lifespan? Marginally less disgust at other humans? Probably a win.

    • Fancy Meau-Faux

      That much random capitalization makes my brain hurt.

    • puredog

      It looks like that webarchive WSJ paywall workaround has stopped working, or, at least, it just took me to the usual paywalled “$ Here, Suckers” WSJ page.

    • Joe Beese

      Some of us still prefer the old ways – i.e. Dead Breitbart comments.

  • wide_stance_hubby

    McMaster Haters Pound Fists In Impotent Rage

  • OrdinaryJoe

    Thunderclouds forming, expect a shitstorm Friday afternoon.

  • Jeff Ackerman

    If it wasn’t for Wonkette, I couldn’t keep up with all the drama in the “finely tuned machine” that is occupying the White House. I’m tired of “so much winning”

  • elviouslyqueer

    “The base has spoken.”

    Pity we’ll never know what they had to say, seeing as Google hasn’t developed a “Particularly Juicy Shart to English” translator yet.

    • BigCSouthside

      Translation: maybe 15% of the 23% of the voting population has spoken. So like…20-30 dudes with cartoon frog avatars or something.

      • grindstone

        I will never forgive Bannon and Breitbart for organizing the basement dwellers into a bloc.

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    This will only make it easier for Trump to hire the best people.

  • Bright Bart

    Lordy I hope its the pee tapes

    • You should ice that burn

      The “Pee tapes” are literally the last thing I’m interested in, quid pro quo with the FSB during the election..Priceless!

      • Yellerduck

        Yeah, but come on…I mean, Pee Tapes!

        • You should ice that burn

          Meh..His deplorables won’t care..”That blonde one is Hawt, I share his taste in Hos, he’s just like me!!”

          • Ms.Moon

            I want them to come out because I want to see the hoops that the Evangelicals jump through to justify/excuse his actions because they’re massive hypocrites.

          • You should ice that burn

            I hear that, although they’ve already jumped through the “Jesus taught us to make life as miserable as possible for the poor and the sick, and to look up to the very rich” looking glass, so that fairly brands them as hypocrites.

  • Joe Beese

    BeleaguredPopehat (de-Tweet-ified)

    [Mueller impaneling a grand jury] is Big. Here’s why. The Biggitude isn’t necessarily that there’s a crime, or that Mueller thinks that there is one or may be one. The Biggitude is the procedural/investigative significance of starting up a grand jury investigation and what it suggests he’ll do.

    This suggests he can, and will, compel witnesses to appear to testify. That will either yield (secret) grand jury testimony or it will yield a cascade of invocations of the Fifth, cooperation negotiations, and the like. Or both. Moreover, particularly with judgmentally challenged people, this phase increases pressure and thus dumb new crimes — obstruction, perjury, etc. Plus you’ve got your grand jury subpoenas for documents, which tend to leak and similarly drive dumb/self-defeating reactions.

    With sensible, prudent, obedient clients, this is gravely dangerous. With this crew . . . well. Hold their beer. It addition, it reflects that Mueller believes there’s a certain level of “there” there to justify a GJ investigation.

  • SadDemInTex

    President Bannon has so far survived the purges. I do wonder what he has on Trump. Maybe he has the pee tape or copies of IRS returns? Dunno…… https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/b059e96cb3768a10ea276f04c463cc14f100f670d351d3cea4f38110cd78ca8c.jpg

    • WotsAllThisThen

      If anyone has pee tapes hidden in his complete Seinfeld DVD collection, it’s him.

    • Gayer Than Thou

      The telephone of a reliable coke dealer. Allegedly and with votes!

  • Gayer Than Thou

    Ugh. Look, I know ensemble casts can often be great, but more often they wind up having a million subplots that don’t make sense and you can’t even remember who the characters are.

    • Serai 1

      I know I’m having a hard time keeping all the Corleones straight in my head.

      • FlownΩver

        In this bunch it’s all Fredo, all the time.

    • JMP

      It’s especially hard to keep up when half the cast leaves and gets replaced every few months. Is the Trump administration being written by David E. Kelly?

      • Serai 1

        Come to think of it, I haven’t heard much from Aaron Sorkin lately.

        • JMP

          We need more shows where wise old white men condescendingly explain to young women how the world really works, making the young women want to fuck the old man.

    • elviouslyqueer

      It’s like original Star Trek, except that everybody’s wearing red shirts.

    • Martini Ambassador 🍸

      I’m only watching this season for the inevitable “dragons raze the village” episode, in all its gory majesty.

  • JMP

    Good job encouraging infighting among your senior administration officials, Donald, preventing you from getting anything done and saving the country from disaster.

    • Mehmeisterjr

      Hey, it worked for Hitler until that one time.

  • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

    McMaster only took the job because he was essentially ordered to (or resign). That pretty much means there isn’t anyone remotely qualified who wants to be within a couple hundred parsecs of this trainwreck.

  • jesuswasablack

    I wish he would fire McMaster and put in some unhinged wingnut. I’ve said from the beginning having “normal” experienced government and military types on the Trump team is bad, we need the far-right loons in every position. The ship is sinking these “sane” adults in the cabinet are just keeping it afloat longer, let the whole fucking thing come crashing down. Bring on the Loons!

    https://cloudfront.mediamatters.org/static/uploader/image/2016/08/24/alt-right-20160824.jpg

  • Cock Blockula

    “Night of the Long Sporks” is my favorite phrase of the week. Hilarious and true!

    • starfanglednut

      The genius of Dok. That’s when I knew the post was his.

  • Anna Rompage

    “Islamists, globalists, and Leftists”

    I think you meant to say Middle eastern terrorists, jews, and Marxist socialist commies…
    All three of which seem to love hummus…. Hmmmm, maybe it’s the hummus that is radicalizing these people…

    • You should ice that burn

      You know who else likes Hummus… the Joooooooos!11!

  • mfp, all 6s&7s&9s

    OT….WSJ reporting that robert mueller has fired up a DC grand jury in russia probe….wont be long now!

    • armed_bears

      Explosive News Orgasm for the day? It’s still 4 hours ’til withing hour…

    • Cock Blockula

      Eyes peeled and ears open for the Friday night news dump…

  • Joe Beese
    • mfp, all 6s&7s&9s

      yeah….so what is the orange asshole gon do bout it anyway?…fuck him, he’s goin down

    • The Wanderer

      Rut ro.

      • Joe Beese

        Congress better pass that “protect Mueller’s ass” law toot sweet.

        • The Wanderer

          Damn straight.

        • Red Bird

          What law?

      • armed_bears

        Scooby snax for everywonk!

    • GreenGoldSharpie

      You’re honestly looking at the dumbest motherfucker on the planet. Had he not run no one would be digging through his shit and finding out that his “empire” is built on fraud, lies, and outright law breaking.

      • Joe Beese

        He would have braved any hazard to make America great again. And this is the thanks he gets.

        • Dudleydidwrong

          That fucker IS the hazard. And so his is vice-president, alas.

      • BigCSouthside

        Hubris will fuck you up

        • Joe Beese

          Fortunately for me, I’m too smart to fall to victim to hubris.

          • GreenGoldSharpie

            It’s my modesty. I’m pretty much the most modest person in the world.

          • BigCSouthside

            Iswydt

          • Mehmeisterjr

            I have the best hubris. Incredible hubris. Jim said to me, “You have just this great, fantastic hubris.” People say. Lots of people say.

    • Major_Major_Major

      Trump’s redline== his rube-icon

  • janecita

    And if you guys are curious about the West Virginia rally, here is the reason for it.

    West Virginia Governor to Switch from Democrat to Republican – The New York Times
    https://apple.news/A1UFap3H9RxWCQ_3pquAIdw

    • The Wanderer

      I thought he was already Republican.

      • janecita

        Basically, he was, now is official.

        • The Wanderer

          And a resounding “meh,” followed by unhinged ranting culminating in Trump firing both Mueller and McMaster.

    • cmd resistor

      Will that be the big surprise announcement Trump is going to make tonight?

      • janecita

        Yup.

        • cmd resistor

          Kind of boring as far as big fat surprises go.

          • MynameisBlarney

            Well, he doesn’t have ANYTHING else to talk about that isn’t part of an ongoing investigation.

          • janecita

            All his surprises are stupid and boring.

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

        You have to try to stop the flash flood in the slot canyon someway.

    • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

      The guy is a “Democratic” politician in the same way Kim Davis is, so not someone I’m going to cry in my beer over losing.

    • MynameisBlarney

      Meh.
      Good riddance to the fuckin’ DINO.

    • Manders

      Don’t they mean “switch BACK from Democrat to Republican”?

    • BigCSouthside

      The governor of Land of 10000 Trailer Parks was a Dem?

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      It’s rare to see a rat boarding a sinking ship. Good luck governor! You picked a good time to decide to flip.

    • Major_Major_Major

      West Virginia Democrat is to the Democratic Party as Ben Carson is to wakefulness.

    • Covfefe

      Trump brang 50,000 coal jobs back. Why wouldn’t the governor of West Virginia want to latch onto Donald’s coattails?

  • timpundit

    Beware the patriot bearing an ornamental Tiki Torch. They mean bizness.

  • Nounverb911

    At times like these, I’m sorry that Al Gore invented the internet.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      I hear he’s working on this global warming thing which should put and end to it.

      • armed_bears

        More and more people are saying. He’s beng recognized more and more for it.

  • Scooby

    Odds McMaster next to go 6/4.

    • MynameisBlarney

      Mebbe.

    • janecita

      My money is still on Tillerson.

      • BigCSouthside

        Jeff sessions in a fit of rage while on vacation

        • GreenGoldSharpie

          KKKeebler will never quit. He believes in what he’s doing.

          • The Wanderer

            (eyes his copy of The True Believer) Heaven help us.

          • GreenGoldSharpie

            The good news is that what he’s doing can be reversed. It won’t undo the damage he’s doing for a good while, but it will be on the Democratic agenda in 2020.

          • janecita

            Of course not! He has pot smokers to send to prison, families to deport, and minorities to deny an education to. The man is BUSY!

          • GreenGoldSharpie

            I bet he punches his pillow at night for all the abuse he gets.

            Good. I hope the little fuck cries.

          • LesBontemps

            Punching his pillow? Or biting it?

          • OutOfOrbit

            he dry-humps his pillow at night?!

          • Dick St. Dipshit

            He has no idea what he’s doing, but he believes in it.

          • janecita

            He is doing God’s work, you heretical heathen!!!!

          • Dick St. Dipshit

            *blows a cloud of pot smoke* Fiddle-dee-dee.

          • Dudleydidwrong

            Sounds a bit like the religion I used to have. Have faith, Jeffie!

      • Scooby

        He’s 11/2

      • Red Bird

        Why not both?

      • starfanglednut

        But who will make the deals in the arctic once the sanctions are lifted?

        Oh, wait.

    • Anna Rompage

      I’m thinking Miller or Bannon…

      I’m pretty sure McMaster is safe under Kelly…

      • starfanglednut

        I’d be very, very happy if that white supremacist piece of shit got fired. It might slow the destruction of the republic a bit.

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    “The base has spoken.”

    See, GOP assholes? When you let a bunch of mouthbreathing imbeciles think they make the decisions, they believe it.

    • Bright Bart

      the base of Steve Bannons self sucking cock perhaps

    • laughingnome

      Do they mean farting or crapping when they say that?

      • The Wanderer

        Farting and tap dancing.

  • Red Bird

    I’ve gotten ZERO work done today. Thanks Wonkette.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Have you considered a job at the White House?

      • Red Bird

        Yes. I want Sarah’s jerb.

        • You should ice that burn

          How’s your deflection, obfuscation, prevarication, and whataboutism skilz?

          • Red Bird

            I’m not sure why you would want to ask such an elitist question. In my heart I feel that I’m qualified for the job and that’s what really matters. I mean, what about all of those hard working Americans who only want to live their lives as they believe it should be. Freedom and liberty. That’s what we crave in this country. And my duty is to fight for our entitlement as patriots to live out our destiny.

          • LesBontemps

            Needz moar fake newz.

          • Red Bird

            A fart in you general direction, sir.

          • You should ice that burn

            Not bad, not bald-faced enough though..

          • Red Bird

            What you fail to realize is that the fake news media doesn’t like to talk about my average joe communication skills that touch to the heart of every American, growing prouder every day of their president, exploding with true pioneer spirit of the frontier and the south, building a greater American, a greater nation, from the ashes of what was once the beacon on a hill for the world. I believe in this country.

          • You should ice that burn

            Closer…

          • Red Bird

            Thanks. I’m working on the deadpan delivery and haggard look. You know what they say. If you want something bad enough, work at it!

        • WotsAllThisThen

          If I got paid to not answer questions I’d be so happy.

    • The Wanderer

      I’m still a page and a half from finishing this chapter. Nertz.

      • Red Bird

        I’ve been looking at the same details all afternoon. It’s a good thing I take work home and don’t bill extra time.

  • Serai 1
  • Indiepalin

    It seems Gen. McMaster, despite his clever cover, was working for Obama all the time. Plus he was behind every single one of those espionage leaks as well as being a well-known pothead.

    • jesterpunk

      So he did Benghazi with Hillary and helped Ted Cruz’s father kill JFK?

      • Anna Rompage

        No silly, he IS Hillary’s personal henchman, Ben Ghazi…

        • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

          Ben can get the job done right! Lou Ghazi was such a fuck up.

          • laughingnome

            The Ghazi brothers? From Newark, right?

          • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

            Yeah! They use to run numbers down on South St.

          • laughingnome

            Little Joey Ghazi was psycho. He shot up the pool hall down in Harrison.

          • Anna Rompage

            And Cotton Ghazi was all wrapped up around numerous wounds

          • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

            Father Giulio Ghazi would be so disappointed.

      • laughingnome

        he brought down the Hindeburg and sank the Lusitania

        • jesterpunk

          He was also responsible for Killing Lincoln, Jesus and also killing BillO’s career.

          • laughingnome

            He killed the czar and his ministers

          • alpacapunchbowl

            McMaster and Margarita!

        • Dudleydidwrong

          Trump voter: “Uh, it was the other way around, wasn’t it?”

      • Beanz&Berryz

        And the Maine. Don’t forget he sunk that drug den the Maine!

        • UncleTravelingMatt

          D-Money, Smoothie, and Shifty are getting jobs on the NSC!

      • Serai 1

        At the very least, it’s well known that he did in that poor little Rich boy.

    • laughingnome

      Sounds like a cool guy I’d hang out with.

    • natoslug

      I heard he also sunk the Alamo.

      • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

        Did he also bomb Pearl Harbor or was that still the Germans?

        • natoslug

          The Germans bombed Pearl Harbor. McMaster bombed Harbor Freight. Or at least the Poughkeepsie branch men’s room. Really shouldn’t go shopping immediately after taco night.

  • YoBunnyBunny

    Oh NOOOOOs!!!

    Now you’ve done it, McMaster!!! They’re gonna bring the “FIER MCMASTER1!!!1!” to the rally tonight. They mean BUSINESS, man!

    • Dudleydidwrong

      Some of the people at that rally will see “Fier McMaster” and think: “They want me to go beat off at McDonald’s? Anything for Trump.”

  • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

    Scary! He looks like Col. Kurtz! But here’s Mike Cernovich, the poor dear who’s been targeted for death by the ADL, linking to a website called “H.R. McMaster Leaks,” which ofers as a header this wacky cartoon of McMaster and David Petraeus as puppets controlled by George Soros, who is himself a puppet being controlled by a hand labeled “Rothschilds.” It’s all symbolic ‘n’ shit:

    Dok:
    Fun Fact: Not only did Mike Cernovich link to the cartoon, he personally commissioned its creation.

    From Ben Garrison’s cartoon blog: “Commissioned Cartoon for good buddy Mike Cernovich”

    http://grrrgraphics.com/cartoonblog/mcmasters-masters

    • SadDemInTex

      Vomit.

      • TJ Barke

        So hard that yer guts end up outside…

  • (((fka_donnie_d)))

    The base? Echo base?

    • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

      Ace to Base!

    • Major_Major_Major

      Free base

    • Geoff Richmond

      Base jumping.

  • Reximus
  • Joe Beese

    Does John Kelly’s new role in the White House make Trump less likely to try to fire Mueller? The point of bringing Kelly in was to bring order to the administration; Trump canning Mueller would generate a political tornado unlike anything since, perhaps, the Clinton impeachment. American politics would be consumed with it. The congressional GOP would be paralyzed, forced to decide whether to stick with Trump in dubious circumstances or turn on him. It’s impossible to imagine Kelly would go along with it given the near-certainty that it’ll backfire ferociously. And if that’s so, Trump firing the special counsel might mean he’d have to fire not just his deputy Attorney General as well but his own chief of staff.

    http://hotair.com/archives/2017/08/03/go-mueller-impanels-washington-grand-jury-russiagate-probe/

    • ltmcdies

      I wonder if a bit of long game is going here….contain Trump with Kelly while Mueller gets the evidence they need.

      especially if Trump can be slowed down firing Mueller.

      there has got be Republicans who want Trump gone by now. Even if his diehard supporters haven’t a clue the damage he’s doing.

  • susan_g

    “Wonderful things can happen when you plant seeds of distrust in a garden of assholes.”
    –Elmore Leonard

    • Dick St. Dipshit

      I’m going to get a tattoo that says that.

      • janecita

        On your ass?

        • Dick St. Dipshit

          My belly is the only part of me big enough to accommodate all that.

    • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

      My grandmother had an asshole garden. Always yelling at me for walking through her assholes.

      • GreenGoldSharpie

        That sounds weirdly sexual. :-D

        • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

          The smell ruins the experience.

      • laughingnome

        Never wear cleats

    • TheGrandWazoo2

      http://i.imgur.com/jbFCNg3.gif
      (h/t to whoever posted this the other day)

  • moeman

    WV Dem Gov switching parties to suck tRump cock.

    • GreenGoldSharpie

      Well, I’d rather see him boasting rather than making further murderous proclamations.

    • Joe Beese

      Good. Now we don’t have to primary him to get an actual Democrat in the race.

    • La forza del resistino

      he will be rewarded with a gold (proly fake) coal shovel.

    • TJ Barke

      Bout fucking time.

    • Beanz&Berryz

      And Trump is actually traveling to WV for one measly governor flipping parties? He’s pathetic and desperate.

      • The Wanderer

        It’s what he needs. Empty adulation validates his otherwise empty existence.

      • GunToting[Redacted]

        He held a kegger* in the Rose Garden when the House voted to overturn Obamacare.

        *warm, flat remaindered Bud Light.

    • armed_bears

      Great timing, today.

    • elviouslyqueer

      Bless his heart, but he’ll need to find a microscope and some tweezers first.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      I hope he gets voted out of office.

    • georgiaburning

      Hitch your wagon to a falling star

    • Dudleydidwrong

      There’s always a demented rat that swims in the wrong direction.

  • Anna Rompage

    Even Hannity is going ape shit over this, accusing McMaster of being an Obama loyalist…

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Bro’s before D’ohs.

    • hudson srinivasan

      ha hannity our moral center, the paragon of all american values.

      /NOT

    • elviouslyqueer

      And if anybody would know from ape shit, it’s Lumpy.

    • armed_bears

      Well fuck him. If ever there was a time to nut up, it’s when the derp gets deep.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        Hannity truly sickens me.

  • La forza del resistino

    The tweet thread reads like the script of ‘Lord of the Flies’.

    • The Wanderer

      I can just imagine.

  • hudson srinivasan

    i have nothing positive or even polite to say about the whole gang.

    http://ichef.bbci.co.uk/wwfeatures/wm/live/1280_720/images/live/p0/3v/g0/p03vg0wj.jpg

  • Dick St. Dipshit

    “What’s all this talk about globalism?”

    – The Local Milk People

  • TJ Barke

    Ah, Anna Elizabeth would have liked the header picture…

    • OutOfOrbit

      “would have”? ???

      • Shanzgood

        She left for a bit.

        • OutOfOrbit

          ok. that’s ok. she’s ok

          • Shanzgood

            I presume so.

        • OutOfOrbit

          it was on “Greg & Darma” show where i heard that wearing a thong backwards makes a girl feel special

          • Shanzgood

            I’ll have to try that some time.

          • hudson srinivasan

            if you figure that out please explain the logic of that someday.

          • OutOfOrbit

            i hazzed a crush on goofy chick neighbor girl with curly hair

          • Shanzgood

            Isn’t there a MrsOrbit?

          • OutOfOrbit

            She Who Must Be Obeyed is the boss of me and is like a little whirlwind in bed (sheets & blankets & pillows helter skelter by morning) so yeah, OOO is in harness

          • Shanzgood

            Oookay, not sure what that means but I’m going to presume you’re there of your own volition!

          • OutOfOrbit

            i am and glad to be here

          • OutOfOrbit

            donut you ever have little crushes or fantasies about oh stop forget me stfu now

          • Shanzgood

            Maybe. I like a friend of my dad’s but…he’s my dad’s age. Even so, I get stupid when I see him around town.

          • OutOfOrbit

            there yuh go! roll with it. it’s okay to go out of bounds in you own mind sometimes. and i’m purdy sure it is more usual than unusual for girls to find some older men attractive…i find some older wimen HAWT, baby! Loosen up

          • Shanzgood

            Loosen up, huh? *snicker*

          • OutOfOrbit

            not what i meant … or did i?

          • Shanzgood

            Either way. :)

          • OutOfOrbit

            i suspect you dont get fapping alone and “hoowee that felt good”

          • Shanzgood

            Not sure what you mean by THAT, either. I’ll just say, well, the point is that it’s supposed to feel good.

          • OutOfOrbit

            you would know what i mean if you used your bunk, and this is a subject you should bone up on in another venue with other women who said “it’s [suppused] to feel good” and then found out that “it [does] feel good”. and it can make yo feel gooder for a whole day or more

          • Shanzgood

            I didn’t just fall off the turnip truck yesterday, yanno.

          • OutOfOrbit

            i do, i’m sorry about that
            Goodnight & good luck.

          • OutOfOrbit

            you need a imagination re-charge

          • OutOfOrbit

            i donut tell her about my little crushes coz then she teases OOO

          • therblig
  • Portia McGonagal

    Just another day in the “Game of Thunder Thrones Good Scar Face Fellas Wile E Coyote ACME Genius” Presidency.

  • Charles Insandiego

    “The night of the long sporks”. LOL. Best line this week.

  • Mary Theresa

    The Banonites are being purged.

    “The base has spoken.” LOL, they really think Bannon has power, while he is probably next on the chopping block, I hope.

    • The Wanderer

      Only if I see a truckload of ipecac show up at the WH gates.

    • therblig

      The Banobites, with trumpy as Pinhead

      • alpacapunchbowl

        Is that anything like a trilobite? I’m not gonna post a picture because they’re creepy.

        • therblig

          trilobites were among my favorite “creep crawlers” to make. well worth the 3rd degree burns.

          • The Wanderer

            That was a fun toy. Until I burned a small lump of sulfur on the hot plate.

        • The Wanderer

          Trilobites were cute, back in the day.

          • alpacapunchbowl

            Hrm, if you say so. I personally think it’s apt that if you Google trilobite, one of the suggested cross-search terms is xenomorph.

  • TheGrandWazoo2

    Nicolle Wallace: Does Jay Sekulow have any credibility?

    Steve Schmidt: Nobody in this administration has any credibility since 6 hours after Trump became President.

    • The Wanderer

      Hee!

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      Yeah, and that’s coming from the two dipshits who were trying to get John McCain and Sarah Palin elected to run the country.

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    “President Trump hit a record low approval in a new poll from Quinnipiac University — only 33 percent of Americans now approve of the president (margin of error +/- 3.4 percentage points). Buried in that poll is one sign of where he’s losing that support: For the first time, the poll showed Trump with a negative net approval rating among white Americans without a college degree.

    Because of their stalwart support of Trump, especially as opposed to their college-graduate peers, whites without college degrees (or “blue-collar whites” or “working-class whites”) became an obsession during the presidential election. Indeed, whites without a college degree have sharply shifted Republican over the last two presidential election cycles.**

    But last week, that support slipped. The poll, conducted July 27 through Aug. 1, showed that only 43 percent of non-college white Americans say they approve of Trump, compared to 50 percent who disapprove, yielding a net approval of minus 7 points.”

    **Hmmm…this is puzzling. Let’s see, who did we have the last two presidential cycles? Oh, yeah, that black Muslim from Kenya, and then the hated shrew bitch Clinton. It’s not like dumb whites were at all successful during Bill Clinton’s presidency, or Obama’s. Yeah, I remember that nice long recession after Reagan/Bush I were out of office. That was delightful, watching the Savings and Loans implode after Reagan deregulated them, and then the stock market crash, and nobody could sell a house in CA or NY. Then we had the delightful Bush II presidency. That was an economic clusterfuck I had never seen before. What’s not to like about Republicans, if you’re a dumb white person? You may not have a job, and your house is worthless, but at least you don’t have a black or a woman being the boss of you!!!!

    • jowgajen

      Just wait til Trump blows up our economy with the double whammy of severely restricted immigration and mass deregulation. It’s gonna make Junior’s little housing bubble fiasco look like a walk in the park!

      • starfanglednut

        And don’t forget the trade wars.

        • Major_Major_Major

          I’m more worried about the shooting wars the personification of an orc taint is gonna get us into.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        He seems so incompetent, maybe he won’t be able to do anything, and we’ll just keep coasting along on the tails of Obama’s stellar economy.

        //she says hopefully, knowing Trump will leave the economy just like every other Republican has left it – a steaming pile of horseshit.

  • kindness

    I get a kick out of right wing Nazis who call out George Soros for being anti-semetic and being against Israel. The man is Jewish and he lived through the Nazi holocaust as a Hungarian Jew. Jesus Christ on a stick……

    • shivaskeeper

      They are pro Israel only because the Christian death cult they belong to says Israel has to rebuild the temple to herald the second coming.

      They hate and loath the actual Jews, bit will tolerate them for the sake of prophecy. Other than the 144K male, singing, virgins mentioned in the Bible, the rest are hellbound Christ killers.

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      I prefer my Christ on a cracker, with a Bordeaux chaser.

  • A Groucho Marxist

    “It’s the Night Of The Long Sporks.”

    That deserves a fucking Pulitzer.

  • BigCSouthside

    All I can say is

    Trump rally gonna be fuckin insane tonight

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      Especially with the Grand Jury revelations.

    • Dick St. Dipshit
    • Major_Major_Major

      A wee bit of a preview for ya
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gLvcrsbliOo

    • alpacapunchbowl

      Some of the WV contingent of the wonketariat mentioned they’re going down to the rally to protest. I hope they’re careful.

    • jesterpunk

      Its a day ending in Y?

      • armed_bears

        I think that’s the primary criteria.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      I’d love to see a half full arena, but I suspect the idiots will show up in full rage mode. Trump will behave increasingly unhinged, since he realizes he’s in WAY over his head, and needs to do something to hang on.

      • Good_Gawd_Yall

        “Behave”?

  • GreenGoldSharpie

    So, what’re the 3 am tweets gonna look like? Hehe.

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      an all caps word salad of rage,

    • Jennifer R

      I am so amped to see them.

    • Beanz&Berryz

      I bet he has in-flight internet…

    • Jimh

      SAD!

  • Saxo the Grammarian

    Crazier than a shit fight in a monkey house.

    • Duke

      I like monkey houses with glass. The bars just make it splatter.

  • Major_Major_Major

    Dear Leader is in danger,
    disengage spellcheck and set caps-lock to BOLD.. SOMEonE COver ME with the EXCLAAMTOIN PIONTS, IM GOinG IN!!!11!!!

  • ltmcdies

    yeh….considering how much their Lizard King has been screwing up and that grand juries have been impaneled….I think this lot is going to need more than signs to get McMaster.

    one of the few sane members of Trump’s adminstration

  • Everrett Fanuelli
  • Joe Beese
    • Beanz&Berryz

      Oh, but what’s in this envelope that was just delivered?

      • Joe Beese

        An engraved card reading “YOU ARE UNDER INVESTIGATION”.

        • Beanz&Berryz

          “You are ordered to appear….”

          • Geoff Richmond

            “You are cordially invited to attend and participate in the Robert Mueller Russian Collusion Investigation Grand Jury hearings. If you choose to decline this cordial invitation, your presence will be formally requested. If you refuse to comply, then you will be forcibly summoned to attend, under FBI escort. Make your decisions accordingly.”

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      Jim Comey said it three times.
      THREE TIMES!

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      No, I think that’s right. I think if an investigator tells you something three times, you’re in the clear. They can’t touch you. It’s right there in Article XII of the Constitution.

  • janecita

    I got covfefe done today! Thanks Obama.

  • calliecallie

    “The base has spoken.” Those are scary words, frankly. Talk about people who feel fucking entitled. Jesus.

    • Michael Smith

      I was just going to say something about that.

    • TJ Barke

      “The base” is a minority of citizens, so they better start acting with some fucking respect.

    • janecita

      Jesus is a HUGE part of the problem.

    • Duke

      The Trump approval rating has surged to 38.5% on Real Clear Politics!

      That’s downward. His base better rush in before he hits 2:1 against.

      More chanting! More signs!

      More unfocused anger at how complicated the world is and that other people are evil!

      • Erala Contratista

        EverClear politics.
        From a truck stop.

  • FlownΩver

    Let Donnie Two Scoops fire McMaster. He’ll lose whatever grudging acceptance he’s had from the Big Brass. With any luck we’ll be that much closer to Seven Days in August.

    • The Wanderer

      I hope not. The rubes and cretins currently comprising Trump’s base were constantly whinnying that the generals during Obama’s terms had to perform a coup d’état “to save America.” Let’s not give them any encouragement.

      • FlownΩver

        If we still had Bammz I’d agree. Now Luke Wilson and I are both Not Sure.

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    “Grand jury subpoenas have reportedly been issued related to the June 2016 meeting between Donald Trump Jr. and a Russian lawyer.

    Reports on Thursday indicated that special counsel Robert Mueller has impaneled a grand jury in the ongoing investigation into Russian interference in the 2016 election.

    Sources tell Reuters that subpoenas have been issued regarding the meeting between Trump Jr. and Russian lawyer Natalia Veselnitskaya, who promised him damaging information on then-Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton.

    Trump Jr.’s meeting with Veselnitskaya was also attended by President Trump’s son-in-law and White House senior adviser Jared Kushner, as well as then-Trump campaign chairman Paul Manafort.

    Trump Jr. initially claimed the meeting was about the issue of Russian adoptions, but emails he later released show otherwise.”

    LOCK HIM UP! LOCK HIM UP! LOCK HIM UP!

    • Mr. Blobfish

      Get trump’s phone records. They conferenced him in.

  • Joe Beese
    • The Wanderer

      Hmmph. He probably doesn’t even know Nessun dorma.

    • Major_Major_Major

      Do re me fa so la ti da-DJTJR

    • Duke

      But then he won’t get the money. THE MONNNEEEY!

      • Joe Beese

        “I heff no son!”

      • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

        There won’t be any after the legal expenses, lawsuits, and restitution requirements. Donnie Two Scoops should be talking to Yertle and Ryan about cutting a deal and voluntarily stepping down. He won’t because he’s smrt.

        • Duke

          I figure damages, per-person, for a fraudulent election are about $1,000 per American. He’ll have to sell the Rosneft stock.

          • Good_Gawd_Yall

            All kidding aside, I’ve been wondering if a class-action lawsuit could be brought against everyone on the Dolt 45 team who conspired with Russia. It would be sweet as a biscuit to have the end result of this naked cash-grab of Dump’s run for “president” be the utter liquidation of every item of his empire, a final, complete bankruptcy, and the “kids” (all of whom except for Barron are over 30, or so, right?) changing their names because their neighbors in the trailer park kept pissing against the corner of their trailers.

          • Duke

            My thoughts entirely, plus some fun elaboration.

  • Vincent Ricola

    I just can’t help feeling like all this exciting news dropping right when Donald jetted off for a nice vacation is a fantastic predictor of things to come. A really, really, really tremendous predictor. The best predictor.

    #winning

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      He’s going to give a rally in West Virginia, where the billionaire governor is planning on switching parties. GREAT timing on that dipshit’s part. “Hey, I’m going to be the only rat who jumps ON that sinking Trumptanic ship.”

      • Vincent Ricola

        And we thought that boy scout speech was uncut insanity, this West Virginia hillbilly rally is going to be unpredisented.

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          It will mostly focus on Benghazi and Hillary’s email crimes, and the YOOGE inauguration crowd he had, and how Trump loves the uneducated. Also, coal jobs are totally coming back.

        • Kgprophet

          That’s “unpresidented”

    • Catstro

      Hurry, let’s change the locks while he’s on vacation

      • data_ninja

        Maybe it’ll be a Fox News vacation, like the one O’Reilly had.

  • SayItWithWookies

    Geeze – McMaster tries to inject a little reality-based thinking into our national security apparatus and the Trumpies lose it. The next War on Christmas should be fun.

    • Dudleydidwrong

      I’m hoping that the mutha is, like Santa, up the chimney and gone by Dec. 25.

  • FlownΩver

    The Base may have spoken, but the treble and the midrange both say “Fuck y’all.”

  • Yellerduck

    Fire ’em all. Let the gods sort ’em out.

  • Kiri the Unicorn

    OT, but can I make a citizen’s arrest on a charge of Felony Perfume?

    • Vincent Ricola

      Yes. It’s a violation of the public stink act.

    • Dick St. Dipshit

      I think you may have a civil suit if you go into anaphylactic shock.

      • Kiri the Unicorn

        I’d settle for just hauling her to the river and throwing her in.

        • Dick St. Dipshit

          I suppose just turning the hose on her isn’t an option.

          • Kiri the Unicorn

            Not a good thing in a picture frame shop.

    • Red Bird

      Do you know the name of the fragrance? Asking for a friend.

      • Kiri the Unicorn

        I think it’s called “Floral Spring Corrosion”.

      • SigDeFlyinMonky

        “Six Days on a Troop Train.”

      • Mehmeisterjr

        It’s called “Ivanka!”

      • Raan

        “Springtime in Baghdad”.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Grand Stench?

    • Mr. Blobfish

      Based on my recent trip to CVS, I can smell just like Rihanna.

    • Vicki Lawrence’s Covfefe
    • Shanzgood

      If it’s an office setting, tell from as far away as possible “What’s that perfume you’re wearing? It smells like jasmine and decomposing skunk glands!”

    • Mehmeisterjr

      Nostalgic story: Years ago, I worked in an office building and a secretary who worked in some other office in the same building wore some hideous, heavy, musky perfume and lots of it. Even though she was young and pretty, I wouldn’t even get on the elevator with her because I couldn’t breath, her perfume was so bad.

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    https://twitter.com/DoktorZoom/status/893202134673391616
    Globalist Islamist Traitors Manacled Organization

    • Major_Major_Major

      Can you use it in a sentence?
      “If you run out of moonpies and RC Cola, you need to Gitmo.”

      • OutOfOrbit

        i’m on it!

    • hudson srinivasan

      i bet cranky coloradan has not left his basement to chase away a squirrel..

    • The Wanderer

      (sings Guantanamera, quite unnecessarily)

    • goingohm

      I’m gonna leave these here, just in case he realizes he needs some: ……….?????(((())))!!

  • Anna Rompage

    Is anyone else stocking up on popcorn for the reports from Trump’s rally tonight?

  • cheetojeebus

    OT So this WV rally should generate some ‘interesting’ quotes given the current breaking news re Meuller and Russian declarations of his “impotence”. Ouch!

  • whitroth

    But wait, wasn’t *Cohen*-Watnick Jewish, or married to one?

    I remember the idiots all pissed off at Rockefeller was a Jew (except the Rockefellers weren’t, and I can prove it – Oysters Rockefeller was created for the sr. Rockefeller, and I suggest y’all ask your Jewishist friends about shellfish and bottom feeders…)

    Oh, that’s right, the alt-wrong *are* bottom feeders.. or maybe they’re being fed on by the bottom feeders…

    Meanwhile, Wonkette ain’t announced it yet, but SPECIAL! SPECIAL! READ ALL ABOUT IT! MUELLER EMPANELS GRAND JURY ON THE RUSSIA PROBE! Hot off the presses!

    • Shanzgood

      They are feeding from each OTHER’S bottoms.

    • Mehmeisterjr

      I hope you are not referring to canned oysters. YOU MONSTER!

      • whitroth

        Don’t look at me. I think I had an oyster once. No, they were steamed clams. I’m happy to leave them all for youse that like ’em.

  • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

    Given that Mueller has begun to impanel a grand jury, you would think Trump would have other things on his tiny, easily distracted mind than what this fringe bunch wants.

    • Bobathonic

      Who’s going to tell him?

      • alpacapunchbowl

        Who’s going to (try to) explain to him what a grand jury is?

      • OutOfOrbit

        “I’m not gonna tell him, You tell him.”
        “I’m not gonna tell him. He watches teevee, so…”

      • Raan

        No one, if we’re lucky.

  • Poly_Ester

    Appointing a few competent people as camouflage gave the crazies time to dig in. Now they are no longer needed.

    • Dick St. Dipshit

      Really. I hope the next retired general he tries to hide behind will tell him to go piss up a flagpole.

  • Dick St. Dipshit

    I’ve sporken to you before about this punning . . .

    • The Wanderer

      There should be Roehm enough for everyone.

      • Jared James

        Putsch down the keyboard before someone else gets purged.

        • Mehmeisterjr

          Little-known fact: That putsch took place not in a beer hall but in a Munich McDonald’s. This explains the banners reading “Arbeit macht fries.”

          • Jared James

            No wonder they called it the Munchen putsch.

    • Mehmeisterjr

      I admire your strength of character. You-tensile strength.

  • Reximus
  • ltmcdies

    OT but hilarious….just before WV Gov announces he’s joining the GOP ((again))…GOP in that state tweets

    https://twitter.com/davemistich/status/893206363740004352

  • It must be exhausting to be that dumb.

    • Shanzgood

      Exhausting for everyone else.

      • Le Chapeau

        He floats on a sea of dumb.

        • therblig

          the river potomac in winter

          trumpy on the ocean

          dampnut, his eyes closed

          • Le Chapeau

            That’s beautiful

  • Daniel Nee

    Orks is best!

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω
  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    I know this isn’t the open thread, but this is HILARIOUS:
    “Australia’s Prime Minister Slowly Realizes Trump Is a Complete Idiot” by Jonathan Chait
    http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2017/08/australias-pm-slowly-realizes-trump-is-a-complete-idiot.html

    Australia has a policy of not taking any boat refugees, because they don’t want to encourage smugglers. Trump thinks the refugees are criminals. The poor PM tries patiently to try to explain to idiot Trump that they aren’t criminals. Damn, Trump is an actual idiot.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      It’s like trying to help a person who has never seen feet design shoes. They’re speaking two totally different languages, largely because Dolt is, well, a complete dolt.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        I used to think he was pretending to be an idiot, to appeal to idiots, but I was dead wrong. Trump is an actual idiot.

        • Good_Gawd_Yall

          I never could make up my mind, until the pussy tape came out. Then I knew: only an idiot would need to “impress” BILLY BUSH so much that he’d say the things Dolt said on that tape. I probably should’ve known by his utter inability to answer a single question at any debate with an actual fact, but I was so sure he was the “joke” candidate (like a famous Deez Nutz) that I wasn’t paying enough attention.

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            I guess I didn’t realize that someone with as much money as Trump has, could actually be really, really stupid. I’ve met a lot of people who have inherited money, and many of them are stupid, so I’m not sure why I didn’t see it sooner. I really thought he was dumbing himself down to appeal to the rubes.

  • Notreelyhelping

    Stupids is forever.

  • Crystalclear12

    I think we should go with Alex Jones’s suggestion and start putting antipsychotics in the water.

    • h4rr4r

      At least in any water Alex Jones drinks.

  • BMW
    • Raan

      Spoiler alert: None of them.

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    I wouldn’t mind how much stupid there is out there if it weren’t running things.

    • laineypc

      or voting

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Firing McMaster would be a very stupid move, and trump is just the guy to do it.

  • Mehmeisterjr

    Wouldn’t it be easier to fire Vladimir Putin from his current post of Tsar of All the Trumpies?

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Wait. Wasn’t Trump just in West Virginia? Telling dirty stories to the Boy Scouts? Why is he going back?

    • Bobathonic

      They’re stupid there?

    • Dudleydidwrong

      He wants to see if that crowd of 40,000 is still there, giving him a standing ovation.

      • Mr. Blobfish

        About that: I don’t think there are seats at a Boy Scout jamboree.

        • handyhippie65

          not that i remember.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      That’s where Kentucky, Virginia, and Ohio store their extra stupid people. So it’s a great venue for a Hitler Dolt 45 rally.

  • jesterpunk

    OT but Trump’s grandfather wouldn’t have been able to come into this country with the immigration plan Trump wants.

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/politics/wp/2017/08/03/under-trumps-new-immigration-rule-his-own-grandfather-likely-wouldnt-have-gotten-in/?utm_term=.a916d485d5ce

    Were that policy in place in 1885, Friedrich Trumpf would likely not have gained entry to the United States. The immigration record for his arrival that year indicates that he arrived without an identifiable “calling”: The word “none” sits next to his name in that column.

    A biographer of Trumpf — father of Fred Trump, who was the father of the president — told Deutsche Welle that Donald Trump’s grandfather didn’t speak English when he got here.

    “He came to New York,” Gwenda Blair said, “and, after he learnt English, he went to the West Coast, ran restaurants, amassed a nest egg, then went back to Kallstadt, married the girl next door and brought her to New York.” It was on the West Coast that Trumpf (now just Trump) became a citizen and registered to vote in the 1892 election.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      He also ran brothels, so I’m guessing his grandson’s policies would’ve declared him undesirable on that basis, also too.

      • Only if his grandson would have been thrown out for grabbing the staff’s pussies, without paying.

    • h4rr4r

      So we need this immigration plan to prevent a repeat of this current catastrophe?

      I just want to know how he is planning on exempting his golf clubs.

  • Mehmeisterjr

    Too bad Breslin is gone. The Gang that Couldn’t Collude Straight would have been a great read.

    • Bitter Scribe

      Personally, I miss Mike Royko.

      • Good_Gawd_Yall

        Imagine if Molly Ivins had been around.

        • Johnatx

          I know. God, I miss her

        • Le Chapeau

          You guys just mentioned three of the very best of their time. Now I has a major sad.

      • disqus_lWwzrwNaw6

        Uncle Mickey. The best.

        • Bitter Scribe

          Especially compared to the piece of shit who now squats on Page 2.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Hunter S. Thompson would have a field day with this gang.

  • Bitter Scribe

    Is “globalist” the new dogwhistle for “Jew”?

    • Bobathonic

      And cosmopolitan is the dog whistle for globalist.

      • Trip Space-Parasite

        Globalist is a pretty old dogwhistle, I’m pretty sure.

        • Villago Delenda Est

          “Rootless Cosmopolitan” is the Stalinist version of all this.

      • gallbladder

        Or “educated.”

    • h4rr4r

      That has been a dog whistle for jew for as long as I can remember.

  • handyhippie65

    yea, i know where i’d like to stick that fuckin’ wicket.

  • Johnatx

    So. Does Paul Joseph Watson have jaundice, or has he just jammed too many yams up his ass? Inquiring minds want to know

  • Villago Delenda Est

    McMaster, as all of us are aware, is a puppet of Soros, who in turn is a puppet of the Rothschilds, which makes this even more classically antisemitic, in the European sense, where all roads lead to Nürnberg.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      On the other hand, this administration is heading straight towards Nuremberg in the “Nuremberg Trials” sense as well.

  • Jack

    Oh Doc,
    “It’s the Night Of The Long Sporks.”

    ROFLMAO

    • Courser_Resistance

      I adore ‘Night of the Long Sporks’ mostly because I saw a ‘King Spork’ at an outdoor store recently. Basically, it’s a metal spork with holes for a long chopstick can fit into and make a super-long spork. It even comes in its own tin!

      Personally, while yes, you can reach into the deepest region of your freeze-dried meal bag, but honestly, I never get that far. I don’t need ‘more’

      • WhatTheFlux

        I got their King Spork right here:
        1) Unsheath knife.
        2) Cut meal bag.
        3) Resheath knife.
        4) Eat.

    • Le Chapeau

      I know. Best line of the piece.

  • Relativicus

    Now they’re floating Pompeo as NSA, with McMaster replacing Nicholson in Afghanistan. And some of the wingier nuts are calling for John Fucking Bolton to come on as NSA. John Fucking Bolton whispering in Trump’s ear is all we need.

    Here are the only three words you’ll need to know if JFB does make NSA: “Potassium iodide tablets.”

    And what I think I appreciate the most about the Rothschild’s cartoon is its subtlety. But the lunacy has its own charms.

    • laineypc

      Roose, Ramsay, and now John. Bad blood there for sure.

    • (((Aron)))

      And Ben Garrisson claims to not be a Jew-hater.

    • nosuchuser

      If they get that lunatic Bolton in I have one major consolation. I live less than 1/2 a mile from a naval magazine. If it all goes pear shaped we’ll be inside the fireball and won’t feel a thing.

    • Incoming Ham

      He really has turned it into a reality show.

      “I like to be unpredictable.”

      -DJT

    • Economist has a terrifying ‘what if’ scenario re: North Korea (how we might end up in a war). One of the fuck ups is appointing Bolton as Sec State after mattis quits.

  • Fancy Meau-Faux

    Regarding the pic at the top, this is probably more accurate. (For those non-nerds who don’t play Overwatch – Genji players are nearly always useless douchebags).

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/53c751c0fa323fc02c177eae5a72462ed82507ab446a67657766f13ef681e7e1.jpg

  • marxalot

    Why am I living in a timeline that the combined screenwriting teams of “General Hospital,” “24,” and “The Sopranos” would consider hacky, contrived, and excessively convoluted?

  • (((Aron)))

    Ben Garrison is one of the most evil men in America.

    • HorseChestnut

      And he should fucking know better. He knows the hate he’s playing with, he’s been targeted by it himself, and he still keeps beating the anti-(((“Globalist”))) drum, insisting he’s not like those racist and anti-Semitic right wing nut jobs. The willful ignorance burns.

      • (((Aron)))

        Nah, I think he just likes the money notoriety.

        • HorseChestnut

          Is he a LaRouchebag? Seems possible.

          • (((Aron)))

            Wouldn’t surprise me.

            Though since he never talks about nuclear power, I am inclined to believe he is not.

    • Mr. Privilege

      Ben Garrison is a talented artist. You are just some schlub schlepping around on the internet kvetching and moaning.

      • Huh. Poe or idiot? His lines are subpar, his coloring is shitty and his content is about 10th grade B minus.
        So…yeah, talented!

        • Mr. Privilege

          Oy Vey MOAR, please.

          • You spelled “I am sorry for being an utter idiot and I promise to do better from now on” wrong.

          • Mr. Privilege

            You sound like someone peed in your Matzo Ball Soup this morning.

        • HarpyLibtart

          I just feel like someone so obsessed with puppetry should be better at drawing hands. And seriously, motion lines? Still?
          Bless his hacky little heart.

        • Odd Jørgensen

          Unrepenting idiot. He thinks Breitbart is the epitome of journalism and a swell source of real news. And of course he “loves” the joos. At least he loves to talk about them a lot.

          • Mr. Privilege

            You seem like a nice shabbos goy.

      • Tiny kaiju

        And you are what? Ben’s mom?

  • HazooToo

    That picture looks like a bunch of bees in thumbnail size, and as much as I HATE. BEES… I would prefer it to the actual picture.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Another rally for Donald? Geez, the pressure from Russiagate must be getting to him…

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ffd18ef8614d2b81e5bbc3f8462544710e19f83899a8fea7771a5da00a3315db.jpg

    • Buzz1313

      How many rallies has Cinnamon Hitler had since his election and why isn’t the main stream media breathlessly speculating on how “bad it looks for him”?

  • ZyxSync Black

    Man, I thought for sure they would be goin nuts over the news of Mueller’s Grand Jury. Only a bit, most are super focused on McMaster

    • Mathew G. Smith

      Most of them seem to honestly believe the investigation ended months ago and that the whole thing was dismissed.

  • greyXstar

    I think I got Idiot Bingo

    • mancityRed6

      Soros is always center square

      • greyXstar

        Well he’s the center of everything ever so obviously

  • SterWonk

    That picture is Emperor LIBEL!!! You’re lucky some Space Marines don’t take a chainsword to you for heresy.

    • doktorzoom

      Hey, it came from pro-Trumpers. They love adding him to Warhammer stuff.

      • SterWonk

        Really?

        Although, now that I think about it, I suppose it makes sense; both the Emperor and the “God Emperor” are the center of personality cults.

      • Nick

        Do they not get the joke? Of course they don’t, they’re dolts.

  • Lorindel Ó Loingsigh

    MORE rallies? How will they be able to tear themselves away from sock-clad, meth fueled, security guard cuffed, screaming racist bug-outs in the middle of Walmart?

    • Incoming Ham

      You know who else had a lot of rallies?

      • sillyclucker

        Monster trucks ?

        • Incoming Ham

          Nitro Burnin’ Funny Cars

          • wavicles

            This Sunday!

          • MilwaukeeKent

            Sunday! Sunday! Sunday!

      • Mathew G. Smith

        High school sports?

      • OrdinaryJoe

        Stock Market?

      • Lorindel Ó Loingsigh

        No, of course I don’t know that one balled, head cockroach, literal pope of racist cucks, Adolf Hitler held a lot of rallies. I don’t read and have absolutely no fucks to give about history. What is your point?

        • Incoming Ham

          Do you come here often? If you did you know that is a thing around here.

      • TakingAmes

        Monster trucks?

        • TakingAmes

          Dammit, should’ve scrolled. Stock cars?

      • Jackie Jones

        High schools?

  • The Librarian

    Can’t wait for the next head to roll. At this point, I don’t care whose.

    • Incoming Ham

      Pence please.

    • Wookie Monster

      I don’t understand how Kellyanne still has a job.

      • The Librarian

        Haven’t heard much from her since her flash card parlor trick.

    • Shartiblartfat

      Give the people bread and circuses or heads or something!

  • SeeTrain65
    • Three Finger Salute

      -Mark Twain

  • Zyxomma

    Night of the Long Sporks is a thing of sheer, transcendent beauty.

  • Jeff Mc Donald

    You know, it’s strange that the only conspiracy that Republicans can’t recognize is the one that involves Trump. Weird.

  • Lol the base has spoken. When do you figure they get it that Trump gives fuck all for what they are speaking and so long as he keeps tossing them the red meat of scary browns they will still follow him?

  • SineDie

    Hope many rallies has Trump held in W VA lately?

  • Manhattan123

    I wish someone would have brought toothpaste to the W Virgina rally because there were some toothless hillbillies on that stage tonight.

  • pixeloid

    I wonder if he’s doing this to get the loonies out before the upcoming war with North Korea starts. They’ve already ordered all US citizens to leave DPRK by 9/1. Is that proof? Probably not, but tRump needs to do something to improve his poll numbers. Look at all the praise he got for being “presidential” after pointlessly shooting some missiles into Syria.

    • Tiny kaiju

      I’m not sure South Korea becoming a radioactive wasteland as a result of Stratego with Trump and Kim would play in Peoria. Where would we get our washing machines from then?

  • ExecutorElassus

    That image at the top, viewed from afar, looks like a pile of cockroaches. Fitting.

    • JesusWasAHippie

      I’ll be damned. It sure does.

  • fawkedifiknow

    You knew this guy – McMaster- was screwed when sane people reacted favorably to his appointment in the first place.

  • Rickyphoo

    You know tRump is useless to you now, Putin. Please, please, please release the Pee Pee Tape!

  • That “Deep State” weirdo sounds hungry for a Cheeseburger Royale???
    http://meta.ath0.com/img/2017/02/deepstate.jpg

  • Mike

    I thought I’d finally be able to sleep for more than 4 hours at a time after reading about Mueller empaneling the GJ, but then I read the article about Trump’s conversations with Nieto and Trumbull…holy mother of freaking god…
    I won’t sleep til I’m certain this clown is nowhere near the nuclear football…

  • Ducksworthy

    Ezra Cohen-Watnick: Best villain name since Gargamel!

  • Ducksworthy

    Meanwhile, big trouble is brewing for the Israeli Prime Minister.

    BBC: “A son of the Israeli prime minister is facing a public backlash amid an
    escalating row over his reported failure to pick up his dog’s droppings.”

  • TakingAmes

    I haz a confuzzed. I thought “globalist” was dog whistle for Jew, or at least for Jew-lover. How could McMaster be deeply hostile to Israel while also being a globalist?

    • Tiny kaiju

      Their cognitive dissonance is legion. It encompasses multitudes.

  • Themostunclean

    Funny that this just happens to be the same bullshit narrative being pushed by the Russian trollbot army over the last 48 hours. Coincidence?

    For all their crying over the “deep state” it’s just pathetic that these people can’t even see that they’re opinions are being completely controlled by the propoganda arm of a hostile foreign government.

  • kfreed

    “…we looked at the weird wordvomit that got Bannon pal Rich Higgins fired from the National Security Council”

    The word vomit happens to be the John Birch Society’s racist “New World Order” conspiracy theory popularized by the religious right and Ron Paul (here’s the Bircher video starring Ron “White Power” Paul): https://newsone.com/1754815/ron-pauls-new-world-order-conspiracy-theory-video/

    Southern Poverty Law Center’s Dave Neiwert takes us down the rabbit hole: http://dneiwert.blogspot.com/2007/11/dark-side-of-paul-phenomenon.html

    BTW, Trump/GOP agenda (every single move Trump is making originates here): https://www.sanders.senate.gov/koch-brothers “What Do The Koch Brothers Want?”

    ^Which begs the question: WHY is Bernie Sanders making common cause with Ron/Rand Paul and enlisting Libertarians to attack Democrats?

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