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If only universities had safe spaces for white people…

In a move sure to be popular with lots of people who believe minorities have all the advantages, the Department of Justice is apparently switching around resources in its civil rights division to tackle one of America’s greatest injustices: affirmative action programs that supposedly discriminate against white students. The New York Times got its hands on an internal DOJ document that

seeks current lawyers interested in working for a new project on “investigations and possible litigation related to intentional race-based discrimination in college and university admissions.”

That ought to be a at least some relief to Trump supporters, who know for a fact that if any black kid is in college, it was at the cost of some more-qualified white kid. No telling whether it will be enough for those who are also convinced all black people go to college for free. The project will investigate and bring lawsuits against schools suspected of doing too much to encourage diversity, since white folks have it so hard.

Now, the DOJ actually has an office that handles claims of discrimination in education, the Educational Opportunities Section, but this new initiative is so important it can’t be trusted to career Justice Department civil servants, so it’s being run out of the front office of the civil rights division, by political appointees who can be trusted to agree with Republican priorities. And just who are the victims of discrimination this bold step into 1961 Alabama is intended to help?

The document does not explicitly identify whom the Justice Department considers at risk of discrimination because of affirmative action admissions policies. But the phrasing it uses, “intentional race-based discrimination,” cuts to the heart of programs designed to bring more minority students to university campuses.

Oh, OK, so that’s a bit of rightwing code there. That would explain why all the dogs in the neighborhood started howling when we opened the story on our computer. What it really means is that the civil rights division will be shifting away from silly wastes of effort like protecting voting rights and will be a source of succor for mediocre white students who think a brown person got “their” spot in a selective university.

In one of our favorite bits of question-dodging, a DOJ spokesperson told the Times that John Gore, the acting head of the civil rights division, wouldn’t be available for an interview about the new program because the department “does not discuss personnel matters, so we’ll decline comment.” Hey, it was a question about a document asking department lawyers to apply for jobs, so obviously, that’s a personnel matter, not a policy matter.

Just last year, the Supreme Court held that a University of Texas at Austin affirmative action program was constitutional because it only considered race as one of many factors in selecting for a diverse student body. The school had been sued by a mediocre white girl who was very sad that several minority students with slightly lower scores on a “personal achievement index” were admitted instead of her, although that index also resulted in 42 white applicants whose scores were at or below her level also being admitted, and 168 minority students whose scores were equal or higher than hers being denied, just like her. But race was included among all the factors, so obviously she was a victim, she just knew it.

Now the Justice Department can get out there and do some Justice on the behalf of marginally qualified white kids everywhere. The move was welcomed by the usual suspects, like Roger Clegg, a former official in the civil rights division under Ronald Reagan and George H.W. Bush, and now the head of a conservative group calling itself the Center for Equal Opportunity. Clegg was over the moon, calling the Trump DOJ project “long overdue,” because America has so many of Those People now (fine — he said “diverse,” but you know how he meant it):

The civil rights laws were deliberately written to protect everyone from discrimination, and it is frequently the case that not only are whites discriminated against now, but frequently Asian-Americans are as well

Reagan and Bush, of course, started the tradition of Republican presidents using civil rights laws to make life easier for the oppressed white majority in America, which in those old-fashioned days was actually considered rather controversial.

This is just the latest DOJ swing to the right; under Attorney General Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III (barf), the department has already said it would no longer pursue a case against Texas’s voter-ID law, since discrimination isn’t real. Sessions also announced he would review whether racist police departments would really have to reform under consent decrees, because what if a cop somewhere was prevented from shooting a black motorist who really needed shooting? Then last week, the DOJ jumped into an employment discrimination case to argue that the 1964 Civil Rights Act’s ban on sex discrimination doesn’t apply to gay people, possibly because there were no gay people in 1964.

In other words, it’s business as usual for the civil rights division under a Republican president, hooray. Now when is Sessions going to fix it so nobody can print business signs in Spanish or make decent hardworking Americans press “1” for English, huh?

Yr Wonkette is supported by reader donations. Please click the “Donate” clicky, before Jeff Sessions requires us to hire a member of the Duck Dynasty cast for diversity.

[NYT / Ashley Ford on Twitter / Image from YouTube]

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  • ArgieBargie

    To be fair, how can we realistically ensure the success of the persecuted White Christian male minority if we don’t level the field a bit? This is the Civil Rights issue of our time!

    • Three Finger Salute

      re: white “Christian” dudes… Am I the only one who sees not only a Helter Skelter race war on the horizon because of this maladministration, but an American version of the Troubles? A lot of Hispanics are Catholics; most of “white, Christian” Trumpists are some sort of evangelical Protestants, but obviously the ones like Roof et. al. don’t want the black Protestants in their “nice” megachurches — except as tokens for when the camera pans the congregation rows on the Joel Osteen show or whatever the hell else is on the Trinity Broadcasting Network these days.

      I don’t know what’s most popular religion among Asians, but I do know that when the U.S. describes “Asian” they only mean what used to be called “oriental” but isn’t anymore. Britain uses the BAME initialism (Black, Asian, Middle Eastern) and includes a subcategory South Asian to include people from their former colonies like Bangladesh, India and Pakistan. But the U.S. would just prefer that they not exist and so doesn’t count them at all.

      All I’m saying is that the RAHOWA fantasy that Bannon sucks his own mooch about at night may end up being a self-fulfilling prophecy, thanks to him and the rest of Trump’s ilk. Besides a literal color war, the religious one not being just the one everyone always talks about where the “Judeo-Christians” fight the Muslims at the end of the world (and those in the know, know that the real goal is to use the Jews as a temporary wedge against Muslims, before slaughtering them all for Jesus), but an internal battle between the Catholics vs. the (evangelical) Protestants. Especially with the Catholics having a guy like Pope Francis at the helm, and the various “self-ordained” denominations for some reason attracting people like Roof and the Westboro types. #NotAllProts, I know, but the Klan quite infamously hated “papists,” and the C Street cult is all but exclusively tied in with the NSGOP.

  • therblig

    nice of trumpy’s administration to make asians honorary whites.

    • Oblios_Cap

      or at least white-ish.

    • MrTusks

      The Jews and the Irish eventually got there, who says Asians can’t do the same?

      • Oblios_Cap

        Just don’t scratch an Irishman – you know what they say you’ll find.

      • Three Finger Salute

        There are some Hispanic columnists who’ve said that as long as Hispanics “play by the rules” (i.e. become WASPish conservatives, forget their Spanish, and pass the “paper bag test”) that they, too, will eventually be considered “honorary whites” and be shielded from deportation. Apparently there’s a Stockholm syndrome that’s setting in in some circles, where in order to survive, some Hispanics are learning to assimilate into the Ameriborg hive mind and love Tio Sam, aka Big Brother.

        Calgary Cuban Cruz is used as the poster boy for this, that the “demographic crisis” of “someone else’s babies” that Steve King is losing his shit about won’t happen, as long as Americans import the “right kind” (“white kind”) of Hispanics and cut them off from their culture. That means removing bilingual education and basically obliterating the Spanish language from all areas of public life. Except, maybe, reruns of “I Love Lucy.” But Desi was about as black or brown as Lucy was a ginger.

        In other words, if you’re “Spanish,” (European), you can be considered “American”; if you’re brown/mestizo, you can play baseball (and not beisbol) but not much else; if you’re David Ortiz, but with the same melanin shade and none of the sportsball skills, you’re going to just be thrown to the bottom of the heap as a black life that doesn’t matter.

        What a nice country we are.

  • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist
    • Blackest Noobs

      it’s weird how back then most of us…well not me…but most of us didn’t see how fucking racisty this movie is/was….it took me years before i would accept Ponyboy as an actor again…like if he was in some piece of shit…which he was often doing…i would refuse to see it because of Soul Man.

      and that movie ruined that song.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        Hey, in the end, he learned to respect diversity or something, so, it’s all good?

        • Blackest Noobs

          ha ha…so bad…..so very very bad.

      • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

        It’s the same thing with John Hughes movies. We ignored how horribly homophobic they were (Or just didn’t care).

        My girlfriend and I saw Soul Man. We were underage and it was the only film we could get into that wasn’t “R”. No one was in the theater but us. So naturally we fucked in the very back (Which isn’t easy when James Earl Jones is talking).

      • Three Finger Salute

        IMHO this movie became relevant today in the era of Rachel Crayolazal. Either that woman is mentally deranged, an attention-seeking narcissist, or a plant set up by Republicans to discredit transgender people with whataboutism about “identity fluidity.” Or AOT,K.

        • Blackest Noobs

          AOT, K…definitely

        • Everything was going fine with that woman until her shit parents ratted her out to the media because she was trying to save her siblings from them. The only thing I had issue with was the fact that she accepted scholarship money from organizations that are there to help PoC. She was doing good for the community she adopted otherwise.

    • Michael Smith

      Wow I didn’t realize Julia Louis Dreyfuss was in that.

      That must be why she works so much now… there’s a debt she can never repay.

      • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

        Before Seinfeld she played in a long line of stuck up snob bit parts.

    • rebecca

      what was Julia Louis Dreyfus doing in tht movie?

      • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

        Slummin’!

      • Lascauxcaveman

        What was JAMES EARL JONES doing in that movie?!

        Everyone involved kinda made a bad decision at some point.

  • Oblios_Cap

    You certainly don’t have to have a college degree to see what’s going on here. I’m calling “shenanigans!”

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RvK1F-Thrzk

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “This new initiative will finally give us the security to to reach new heights in mediocrity!”
    — National Association for the Advancement of Mediocre White Dudes and Dudettes

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      They only added “Dudettes” to the name to be P.C.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        And by PC, they mean Party Compatible–no more sausage fests, bro!

      • Michael Smith

        In 2013

  • GunToting[Redacted]

    “If black people want to get into Harvard, why don’t they just get their father to donate $2.5 Million to the school like everyone else?”

    JKush (for full effect, inhale a large balloon of helium before reading)

  • beatbort

    If it wasn’t for the blahs getting all the college admissions slots, the “Get A BRAIN! MORANS!” guy would have been Magnum Cum Loud at MIT by now.

    • Three Finger Salute

      I really don’t want to know the volume at which Tom Selleck er… discharges his weapon…

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    I hate the smell of Bannon in the morning. Smells like … racism.

  • Oblios_Cap

    Who would have thought that an old, short, squeaky Alabama Senator would be racist?

  • Michael R
  • ManchuCandidate

    Meritocracy my ass.

    I heard enough bitching and crying from my aunt who claimed that poor disadvantaged black kids kept my now ambulance chasing asian cousin from going to Havard Law.

    Barry Obama would have been one of his classmates. Given that choice… my cousin didn’t deserve shit.

    By the way the “true” meritcoracy isn’t built around middling white middle or lower class kids. It is RICH white mediocre dullwitted kids like the Trumps.

    • OrG in England

      Mediocre is generous.

    • OrG in England

      “Meritocracy” is a lie made up by assholes born on third base who brag about hitting a triple.

    • Ill-Advised

      Mediocrity is expensive, and not just in the obvious ways.

  • Toomush_Inferesistance

    Sessions is what you call a shit sandwich….here, have this – it’s all we got!…

  • BadKitty904

    This would be the same Dept. of “Justice” currently under the dominion of the Perjurer-General, Beau Secessions, yes?

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/f9830e3defd8c428f704f2d51b0ebbc4b945c00c7c1ba289af4e278637ad09cb.jpg

    • Ricky Gay

      Yes. And I want him to remain long enough to protect Mueller, but not long enough to ruin law enforcement. Dammit, I feel like a republican. Gotta go shower.

  • MynameisBlarney
  • beatbort

    Not enough backwards baseball caps and sunglasses on top of heads in that photograph.

  • Michael Smith

    Ah, yes, opposition to affirmative action. One of the great founding issues of Concern Trolling.

    Can’t wait to see someone say that this will be better for black kids because it will teach them that society sees them as equals and not as people who need assistance.

    • OrG in England

      FREEDOM!

  • Constant Gardener

    Every millennial who raged on about the sameness of the Democrats and Republicans should now be fucking themselves…furiously.

    • BigCSouthside

      That isn’t isolated to millennials. Our whole media outlook is built on that idea

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg

    So first conservatives think colleges and universities are a bad thing but now they want more white kids in it?

    • Sy Colepath

      Much like they hate ObamaCare, but love the ACA?

    • OrG in England

      Intellectual consistency is not their strong point.

    • Creepoman

      I’m guessing the “diversity” part of the university experience is the “bad thing” they are askerd of.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      “Colleges are bad, make you gay, and discriminate against white people” is the excuse conservatives made up to make themselves feel better about not getting in.

  • doktorzoom

    When I was teaching first-year writing as a graduate student in the late ’80s, some of my white students at the University of Arizona would often react bitterly when we read King’s “Letter From Birmingham Jail,” because that was a long time ago, they said. Besides, they said, their high school counselors told them they could have gotten a scholarship if they’d been black, pout pout pout. No, it didn’t help when I pointed out that 95 percent of of their classmates were white, too.

    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      Growing up in the 80’s in Europe we often were told that if you were a black kid in America your best bet for a scholarship was being really good at sports.

      • OrG in England

        Prolly still is.

      • Blackest Noobs

        it kinda still is….ooooh who am i kidding….IT STILL IS!!!!

        • nightmoth

          That’s why Jesse Jackson called college sports programs “modern day plantation systems.”

      • La forza del resistino

        Jeff Sessions attended U of Alabama Law 3 years after the Tide ‘welcomed’ their 1st black athlete.

        • Christopher Smith

          Love your handle!

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      I think them not getting a scholarship might be linked to their belief that, in a historical context, 20 years is a “long time.”

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      You should have assigned them Dubya’s much-praised “Letter From A New Haven Frat House”. You’d be a hero now.

      • Three Finger Salute

        No, even better. The Penthouse Letters, a compendium of erotic correspondence by noted adventurer and brilliant wordsmith John Barron. Volume 1 includes the classic essay, “Golden Showers.”

        • Jennifercstewart

          Golden28a

          Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !au268d:
          On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
          !au268:
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        • boredcatlady

          True, but you haven’t really experienced it until you can read it in the original Russian.

    • NastyBossetti

      THAT was a long time ago? My university required us to take two semesters of Intellectual Heritage that had us reading excerpts from the Bible, among other ancient texts.

      • doktorzoom

        Oh, Birmingham was a long time from the late 80’s… which is now longer ago than 1963 to 1987, yipes.

    • (((fka_donnie_d)))

      I’m morbidly curious, do you still actually teach?

      • doktorzoom

        Never really got a fulltime job in academe, did a lot of adjuncting until 09 and eventually got this Dream Job

        • (((fka_donnie_d)))

          I got a friend of the family that adjuncts math at UMiss, not too happy either.

    • Buzz1313

      Here’s a thing I a thing I don’t understand: who are these asshole teachers and guidance counselors telling white kids they’re losing out to black kids?

      • Celtic_Gnome

        Imagine if Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III had gone into education instead of politics.

  • Sedagive ’em Hell

    An old friend of mine is currently barely speaking to her Trump-loving sister. Said sister is a (formerly reality-based) mathematician who moved down South and suddenly found “religion.”

    During their most recent phone conversation my friend asked her sister why she is still on board the Trump dumpster despite the non-stop fire in the hole. Sister’s reply:

    “Do you know that our nephew was recently turned down for a job? Did you know that the job probably went to a woman or a black?”

    It should be noted: said nephew is a white kid in his early thirties who still lives at home, has been warned, arrested and jailed multiple times for drug possession, and whose rich, devoutly Republican father bails him out each time because “personal responsibility.”

    This move by the DOJ is pure electoral gold for the butthurt, privileged white male base who thinks that this country is theirs by right, and that every woman and non-white male is too lazy, stupid or ignorant to compete against their god-given supremacy.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      “or a black”

      Abandon ship, that lady is gone. What the hell is in the south that does this to people?

      • Sedagive ’em Hell

        Agreed. She is gone.

        I’m just amazed that she’s still working with numbers, given the fact that they’re real-reality-based and all that.

      • OrG in England

        Sore loser syndrome.

    • Manders

      “probably”

      Oh, well, that sounds like solid data, there, math lady.

    • Snopes Shop

      A job that “Probably went to” FFS

  • Indiepalin

    I hope this initiative applies equally to the athletics programs of our institutions of higher learning.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Semi-OT: Football should be banned for children and removed from ALL educational settings. Period. The NFL parted ways with the National Institutes of Health recently, because it considered them to have an “anti-football axe to grind” and didn’t like their conclusions about how destructive this stupid sport is. The tragedy is that most of the money the NFL contributed for research funding will now go unspent. This after a new study revealed that, of the deceased players whose brains were studied since the research program began, 99% of them all had C.T.E.

      I personally consider it no different from a human equivalent of dog-fighting (which is why Michael Vick getting into the actual trade doesn’t surprise me — disgusts, but doesn’t surprise me) or Roman gladiator contests. We’re turning teenagers into Alzheimer’s patients just so Murricans can satisfy their Sunday-afternoon religious obligation to wage ultra-competitive abuse against their fellow man — in this case, someone else’s kid. School is a place to improve the brain through education. Not smash it into the ground.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        I live in the same town as The Ohio State University, and we don’t cotton to that blasphemy around here. And blasphemy it is. Enthusiasm for the football team is indescribable.

        The head coach’s base salary is higher than the university President’s, and, with endorsement deals on top of that, his annual salary is in the low seven figures.

  • CripesAmighty

    “Douchebro Defense Act of 2017”.

  • Blender_415

    As a mediocre white kid, does this mean I can skip taking language classes and pick up all the pieces of spanish and asian languages I need via Taco Bell commercials and take-out menus?

    • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

      Sure, but how many places are you really going to need to know “Beef with Broccoli”?

      • Old town Urbandale

        I was thinking I’d need to learn Spanish for things like “water”, “bathroom”, and “pain” to tell the nursing home attendants eventually, but the G.O.P. will solve that problem by driving nursing homes out of business by dumping Medicaid.

        • Three Finger Salute

          Eventually they’ll just make public bathrooms illegal. It might get held up by some troll tweeting “if bathrooms are illegal, only illegals will use the bathroom.” So they’ll send ICE in to police the loo.

        • Moar Wordz

          Millions of olds in the streets, demented & crapping on their pristine landscaping

    • MynameisBlarney

      I think all that is mandatory.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Wait a few years, learning a foreign language will be illegal, because this maladministration already considers people who speak foreign languages to be “illegals.”

      • Ghenghis McCann

        I was going to say something about English, but then I realised what an elitist I am, because it’s ‘Murrican that y’all speak.

      • Old town Urbandale

        There’s a lot of bitching in Iowa because the state universities require two years of foreign language in either high school or college (some programs, like nursing, require four) but Iowa is 35th in high school foreign language instruction. If you don’t live in one of the big cities (well, big for Iowa) you’re fortunate to get even one year in high school.

        • Three Finger Salute

          And it always bothered me that foreign language instruction in a lot of places doesn’t start until at least junior high if not high school itself. It’s not an immersion program in the least. It’s an hour a day of memorizing nouns and conjugating verbs. You forget it once you’re out of class because you don’t have to speak it.

          It’s a use it or lose it sort of thing, reinforced by the fact that anyone who does speak it natively is placed in a reverse immersion program and told to never speak anything but English again. Or isolated from the mainstream, majority English speakers and made to feel lesser because their language is “wrong.”

          Canada finally got rid of the atrocious residential schools for the First Nations people, and is in the process of making amends. But the U.S. will never have anything resembling a Truth & Reconciliation Commission and we certainly aren’t going to do with Spanish and the Southwest what Canada has done to include French and Quebec. All our schools operate on some level of Borg assimilationism. The very idea of being a polyglot country is communist heathen globalism here.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        The only “illegal” speaking an indecipherable language I know thinks the White House is a dump.

    • SayItWithWookies

      Yo quiero this idea.

  • MynameisBlarney

    So…now we know where Stephen Colbert got the inspiration for his “Black Friend” gag.

    When Kenny G met Miles Davis.

    https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2013-10/enhanced/webdr03/7/1/enhanced-buzz-32183-1381123002-8.jpg?downsize=715:*&output-format=auto&output-quality=auto

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    Nothing better than professional victimhood:
    https://twitter.com/stuartpstevens/status/892592278744813570

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Holy Sheep Shit! That looks like someone took a picture of 4 white people and copied and pasted over and over again to make that crowd.

      • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

        Clone Tool Libel!

      • Celtic_Gnome

        They borrowed the software from Peter Jackson.

    • CountryClubJihadi

      Black kids is all like “I’ll stand next to a real President”.

    • You should ice that burn

      From the Twitter: Joe Q Public: “Of 100+White House interms in the photo, it appears 80 are white men, 20 white women and 3 black men. A real cross-section……… of what?”

      Also, for a fun game, spot the 3rd Black guy..

      (Notice 45 has had his face removed.)

  • SayItWithWookies

    This is bad news for Sebastian Gorka if it means he’ll have to try to get a degree from someplace other than the University of P.O. Box 12575.

    • Three Finger Salute

      You mean P.O. Box 1488

  • Mpeg

    Ugh — I can’t even throw cynical mirth or snark at this, being the offspring of white persons who think the attitude they’re entitled to feel privileged as a self-beneficiary of their heritage IS in and of itself, that attitude, a privilege by way of that same heritage.
    In short; it is their privilege to feel privileged. They are entitled to their own self-entitlement.
    Or some such circular (dead-end) logic that makes it IMPOSSIBLE to talk to them about it from any opposing point of view! People who stay looping in their own logic gleefully avoid any opposite counterpoint to their point.

    • Ricky Gay

      We use circle jerkin, for shorter

  • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

    Of course, special exemptions will be made for non-white men who play sportsball real good.

    • WIDTAP

      They practically pay their own way, really.

    • Oblios_Cap

      Well, duh. Some of them might become millionaires.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        Not in college. They make damned sure the athletes don’t even get the hint of a taste of what their talent is worth on the open market.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    I we give mediocre white people any more unfair advantages, just imagine who could end up in the White House in a few years!

    • Three Finger Salute

      Trump did get in due to an affirmative action program for orange people with low EQ.

  • SadDemInTex

    I would like to point out that if “white” Americans (especially from the South) would get their DNA done they would soon discover that they qualify for “minority” consideration. (Let me make clear that “race” is a construct. In human biology there is no such thing. Eye/hair/skin color is just a flip of a tiny, tiny switch. We are ALL human beings). But these assholes are too afraid of the truth. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ecdc1e575e3e9c1ace262c0d2b9797a857caa992bd6b79b5775edf8d90057220.png https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/a11d95f038ddfc4ddc598597c1a41d6658d9191b17613de2619eb6588c8c1e98.png https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/3c34be0b6a578e34f72e8ab0e2f16355dbfaace70cf361d766a37e9fc363a2d9.png https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/a94ebaba0ff6bde467db2ec6016d38574b79bc3c566db6d1ee5315481c4a91d7.png

    • CriticalDragon1177

      In other words back in the “good old days” they would be seen as “passing for white”

      • SadDemInTex

        “Passing” only because we are such a disgusting racist society. We are the only one who only one “color” line. You are either black or white…which is completely absurd and not human biology. (I repeat: there is no “race” in human biology).

        • CriticalDragon1177

          I know. Why do you think I put those things in quotes?

          • SadDemInTex

            Sorry to be preaching to the converted. 😘

  • BigCSouthside

    I heard an argument this morning that boiled down to “I know black folks have had it bad, but rural white communities are suffering too and are disadvantaged.”

    FUCK. YOU.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      I read something on Slate about Trump voters in Wisconsin. Their attitude could be summed up thusly:

      1. We want the government to leave us alone!

      2. The government doesn’t pay enough attention to what we want, and gives too much to city dwellers/”urban people”.

      The contradiction between these two lines of thought never really comes up.

      • OutOfOrbit

        they cant handle contradiction

      • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

        I think cognitive dissonance is a prerequisite for membership in the GOP. Never have I seen so many people who manage to argue in the alternative, and if you point out the contradictions you’re just a sore loser who can’t argue well.

        • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

          It usually does become an exercise in goalpost moving or whataboutism. Fox might not have given them critical thinking ability, but it does provide an endless supply of grievances.

      • WIDTAP

        3. And don’t fuck with our milk and cheese price subsidies.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Slavery=I can’t pass the Walmart drug test.

    • grindstone

      I grew up in a rural, poor, NC county, 99% white. When I got to university and found out that high schools in wealthier urban parts of the state taught advanced algebras and calculus, and that the freshmen from those schools were placing out of classes that were completely new to me, I was pissed. It wasn’t that I didn’t take those classes — they weren’t offered where I grew up. I took a semester of math, chemistry, and physics just to catch up. So I get it, kids who grow up in the communities where schools are closing, bussing is farther, teachers may not be top shelf, and opportunities are few ARE disadvantaged. But they are disadvantaged IN ADDITION TO minority kids, not INSTEAD of. But like BLM — god forbid you take anything away from me other than the big white chip on my shoulder!!

  • Lyly Sirivong

    If you want to understand the people of a diverse society, you need diverse elites. This will be harmful in the long term.

  • Three Finger Salute

    re: “presiona uno para el español” (in all the years I’ve had to dial those automated teller lines, it’s never been first on the list, always dos. Why does Canada do everything better? Bilingualism has been official policy for decades. Everything from street signs to statements from the government are printed in English and French, and everyone has the right to be addressed in their native language or to have an interpreter provided for them.

    Justin Trudeau speaks French and English. Sophie Trudeau is actually trilingual: French, English and Spanish. Meanwhile, Trump speaks pidgin pigeon goomba, and Sessions speaks the Covfeferate dialect of hickanese. Melania supposedly speaks 5 languages, but it seems all she does is translate Rick Astley lyrics and claim them as her own.

    Some school districts have shifted foreign language class to “optional electives,” replaced them with computer programming languages instead (or allow students to learn HTML instead of Spanish), or removed them altogether from the curriculum. Knowing additional languages — that is, human-readable and speakable languages (HTML doesn’t help you converse with actual people) is said to improve cognitive functioning and increase empathy, so… why do Americans want to continue being paranoiac morons? How soon before the Rosetta Stone software program is classified as a tool of cyberwarfare?

    • Courser_Resistance

      Hear! Hear!

      I’m an outlier in the US of A. My dad was a French ‘interpreter’ in the ASA before I was born and he was committed to raising me to be bilingual. It didn’t work exactly as he’d hoped, but it did foster an interest in foreign languages. I studied French in high school, partly so I didn’t have to study a language in college.

      I learned Italian for a trip, though not very well.Then I took Spanish in Community College a few years back. My problem at that point is that all Romance languages have a common root. Also too, I speak Spanish with a French accent and instead of reverting to English if I can’t find the right word, but French, which is just freaky.

      I’m now learning Swedish, just because. It’s good for my brain (I’m either oldz or rapidly approaching it) and I enjoy learning languages! Swedish is completely different from Romance Languages, but I’m finding my few Gaelic words (Scot side of the familly) coming back.

  • Angela Ruzzo

    I went to college 43 years ago, so maybe I shouldn’t talk, but I remember meeting a significant number of white guys whose behavior indicated they were not yet ready to take on the responsibilities of higher education. Oddly, 80% of them were members of a fraternity, is there a connection there? Quite a few of them drank themselves into dropping out. I knew a few white girls who did the same, including my first roommate, who pledged a sorority and went to their parties every night, was hungover every day and skipped classes, and who flunked all her midterms and dropped out. That school costs $40,000 a year now, so if my kid did that today I’d be really annoyed since they don’t give refunds. The thing is, the university had, and still has, very high admission standards. . .so obviously high school grades and test scores and admissions essays are not entirely reliable predictors of responsible behavior and academic success.

    • Courser_Resistance

      About 41 years here. I was borderline for acceptance to my university of choice, so I had to interview with a dean. Essentially, I was told I the school wasn’t confident that I could/would complete a degree. Which simply made me more resolved to finish. Which I did.

      Here’s the real deal. Universities mostly care about graduation rates. If they accept a lot of students who drop out or change schools, their grad rates drop which can impact the amount of tuition they can charge over the long term. They see the value in having a diverse student body, so choosing between your average white kid and a minority kid who has shown s/he has the fire in the belly to make the most of their education, there’s not much of a choice there.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        My university was noticeably un-diverse 42 years ago. I do not remember seeing or meeting more than 5 or 6 minority students in the time I was there out of a student pop of 5000. This might be because it was very expensive (I had 3 scholarships and a Work Study grant) or it might be because it was in Des Moines, IA, and honestly, how many people of any race want to live in Des Moines, IA? I thought Missouri was cold and very vanilla, but it has nothing on Des Moines. I wanted to go to Georgetown, but they gave me only a quarter-scholarship even though I had a 4.0 in high school and was valedictorian and wrote a brilliant essay, and no Work Study grant, so I couldn’t afford it. It did not occur to me at the time to wonder if my gender had something to do with that. I wonder how diverse Georgetown was 40 years ago?

        • Courser_Resistance

          I went to the University of Colorado, Boulder, a ginormous school. Pretty diverse for the late 70’s with active student groups for most minority groups. Blacks, Latinos, Muslims, Jews, Christians, Gay/Straight Alliance, Lesbians… Just about everyone had a cubby of some sort at the Student Union.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            I have friends who went there at about the same time, they say the same. Sounds nice.

          • Courser_Resistance

            I think it was just about perfect for a white girl from the ‘burbs. I learned so much during my time there that had nothing to do with book-learning. I kind of feel like I’m drawing on those early experiences in my social activism now.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            I learned a lot outside of class too – mostly about how many different kinds of people there are, all with different values and priorities, some of which I didn’t like very much. Living in a coed dorm was also very educational. I had no idea how entitled some rich young women could be, and what slobs some young men could be. I learned how to tolerate and get along with many different people I would never otherwise have met, and that has been very useful in my career AND in my social activism. And then there was that professor with a Ph.D. from Harvard who thought he was god’s gift to Academia. . .he taught me that having a Ph.D. does not mean you are smart.

    • Crazt Maist Waizy

      I’m in university currently, and although I’m a British person going to a British university, the same applies here too and still applies today it would seem. There are quite a few younger people who simply don’t have the maturity to become well-rounded and ultimately just don’t seem able to take responsibility. Drunkeness, etc, it all comes to a point where they will need to grow up very fast to progress.

      I suppose in Western countries for a long time we have not been able to tell necessarily from a person’s grades alone whether they will actually make it to the end.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        I know two men my age (61) who were exceptional students in high school and who got full scholarships to prestigious universities to study medicine and law, but they both joined fraternities, and some time during their first semester they got into alcohol and pot and flunked out by their second semesters. One went on to spend 30 years as a raging alcoholic, although he is now 20 years sober. Both told me they came from conservative, religious farming families and had never drunk alcohol before they went to college. One of my cousin’s sons got a full scholarship to study pre-law at Harvard, and the same thing happened to him, PLUS he got arrested for DUI. He was kicked out, worked several part-time jobs for 5 years, then enrolled in CUNY and got a degree in psychology, and now he can’t find a job. He really fucked up.

        I went to a fraternity party ONCE in college, on a blind date with a frat pledge. I never before or since saw so many people drinking irresponsibly. I drank one beer. My date got so drunk he threw up on himself and passed out, so I called a taxi and went home. They told everyone to bring one bottle of alcohol, ANY kind, and it was all poured into a 55-gallon drum that had a plastic liner in it. The resulting liquid was green and smelled like antifreeze, but they were drinking it like water. You couldn’t have PAID me to drink it. What kind of fool would drink that? There was puke everywhere, and people who were so out of it that they were having sex on the sofas, on the stairs, in the kitchen, on the lawn, etc.

        I don’t think this is a new thing. I believe James Boswell lived it up at the University of Edinburgh in the 1750s.

        • Crazt Maist Waizy

          Alcohol and drugs have a lot to answer for. While I support the decriminalisation of certain drug related things, I still maintain a healthy aversion to them. They can and do ruin lives, particularly for young people. I’ve been very lucky in that the people I get to know barely ever drink irresponsibly and mess up their education, but it saddens me greatly that it happens.

          Ultimately, not in all cases but many, these people never learned at home that certain things were wrong. Many people I encountered at secondary school as well ad university seem to have been taught to be so entitled and selfish- why should I have to be kept up every night just so some idiots can fuck around drunk? Why should I be having to fret and worry about the people who I’m surrounded with?

          Uh, I can’t imagine the chaos, as well as the unpleasant feelings the experience you mention must have given you (I know it would actually scare me.) Foolish people seem drawn to alcohol somehow?

          • Angela Ruzzo

            My parents were responsible, occasional drinkers. They sometimes had one glass of wine with supper (Italian custom), and an occasional beer, and they would order a single drink in restaurants, with meals. They let us have 1″ of beer in a glass starting when we were quite young, as long as they were drinking it too, at home. I never saw anyone drink too much in real life until I went to college. When I got to college I’d go out with my friends and have 1 beer, and they would have 6 and throw up and pass out. I could not understand why they thought this was fun. I do not call that fun. My brother had the same experience when he joined the Navy – everyone around him was falling down drunk, but he was happy with 1, or maybe 2 beers.

            There were rich girls in the dorm who would leave their used sanitary pads and tampons in the toilets. I think they had maids at home. My rich-girl roommate had a potted philodendron, and round about early November it was very dead, so I asked her when she had last watered it. “I have to water it?” she said? At home, the maids did that.

            I spent my junior year abroad in Barcelona, and there was this other American 19-yr-old boy there who was a farm boy from Nebraska. He went crazy – started drinking like a fish, smoking pot (seriously illegal under Franco) and visiting prostitutes (also seriously illegal under Franco). He ended up an alcoholic with VD and almost got arrested and sent to a Spanish prison, and he had to go home halfway through his 1st semester. I couldn’t figure this out. . .this was not how his parents raised him, I’m sure.

        • Moar Wordz

          What an appealing party ! Was rohypnol served w/ the whippets? I’m assuming the “food ” was jello shots and a handful of wet pretzels.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            If there was food, I never saw any, and I wouldn’t have dared eat it if there had been, as they probably would have laced it with hash oil.

        • Moar Wordz

          They seem really classy !!! What scintillating conversations must’ve been had

    • Three Finger Salute

      “I went to college 43 years ago, so maybe I shouldn’t talk, but I
      remember meeting a significant number of white guys whose behavior
      indicated they were not yet ready to take on the responsibilities of
      higher education.”

      If you saw them at a reunion you’d probably discover that they all went into politics or hedge fund trading.

    • Serai 1

      Christ, you all sure are making me glad I never went to college.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        I loved college, I couldn’t WAIT to go there, but I was really shocked at how some students behaved…somewhere I had gotten the idea that it was a place to study seriously for a career, not a place to party. What I liked about college was 1) getting away from my parents 2) meeting all sorts of people from all over the country and the world 3) meeting some really smart people 4) realizing that nobody there knew me and so were not expecting me to behave in a certain way and I could become any kind of person I wanted to be and 5) learning a lot of really interesting things and 6) getting a degree that helped me earn more money and become financially independent ASAP. I also learned that not everyone with degrees is actually smart, capable or competent, which was a valuable lesson at age 18.

  • SadDemInTex

    74million Americans who think they are white have 5-20% DNA from Africa. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6a2917c015789a260291cc3801c9ef8df0365b5035a454789930f692f9f2b418.jpg

    • Courser_Resistance

      I wouldn’t be a bit surprised if I had Africa DNA. My dad’s dad’s predecessors spent a bit o’ time in the Caribbean.

      • SadDemInTex

        The Caribbean is a marvelous mixture from all over the world.

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Well the human race did originate in Africa or is that just to much for a Trumpanzee to handle?

      • Ghenghis McCann

        That’s evolution heresy you’re talking. We’re all descended from Adam and Eve through their two sons. No daughters, just the two sons.

      • SadDemInTex

        The DNA shows that (depending on the percentage) people have African ancestors from as recently as the 1880s or even the 20th century. That is what these people are terrified to discover.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Not only that, the only people they’ve found who don’t have a small percentage of neanderthal admixture are people with solely african heritage. They rest of us are not just racial mutts, we’re species mutts.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      80 million Americans who claim to be “one-eighth Cherokee” are completely full of shit.

      • Everrett Fanuelli

        They were just really inspired by that song from the 70s

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          Cher’s “Half Breed” is a white trash anthem. They piss on actual Native Americans, but always claim they are descended from N.A. royalty.

          • OrG in England

            I thought he meant Paul Revere and the Raiders.

      • SadDemInTex

        That is because by 1690 90% of the indigenous people of the Americas were gone. Most of the people who think they have indigenous ancestors actually have African ancestors. It became more palatable in the disgusting racist society to have Indian ancestors than to be thrust into the Black community.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          I just laugh because it’s always “Cherokee”. Not, you know, Nez Perce, Yaqui, or Ojibwe. It’s the one tribe they’ve heard of.

          • Three Finger Salute

            They bought a pair of mislabeled Jordaches in 1982 from a discount store and though they had Cherokee jeans.

      • natoslug

        I’m one-eighth full of shit. But that’s just the result of Nachos Tuesday.

    • OutOfOrbit

      i can not read that cuz puting my eyes close enough to the tv thingis gets my nose in the way

    • natoslug

      I’m am the palest of pinkish white creatures, and according to my silly DNA thing from Scientific American 5-10 years ago shows that my peeps were out of Africa. Of course, there were quite a few stops across Asia, the Middle East, and Europe while we slowly became whitified. Judging by the still slightly present epicanthic fold, there was a bit of Mongolian horde mixed in there as well, before finally settling in Poland, Germany (Alsace-Lorraine is still on the German side of things these days, right? Or has my German become French again?), and Scotland (by way of a Norwegian captain who wrecked his ship on the shores of northern Scotland. Dude really should have gotten some decent glasses — it’s not like the British Isles just sneak up on you and suddenly whoops!- there’s a hole in my boat! It a great big fucking chunk of land).

      • SadDemInTex

        That DNA was very very general. The ones you get now have a really large base and get pinpoint where your ancestors in the last 200 years came from…and as far back as the 1600s.

        • natoslug

          Well, if we just want to go back to the 1600s, I think we can look to the gutters, barrooms and brothels of Europe to find my ancestors. No need to waste good drinking money on DNA.

      • SadDemInTex

        I recommend you do it again. You will probably fine you are 99.999% European but why not live in hope?

    • SomeBigRedDog

      My ancestors consist of a shepard from Germany and some sort of errand boy from Labrador.

    • Buzz1313

      The look of horror on their faces when certain ones discover this fact is hilarious

  • Toomush_Inferesistance

    Competence, intelligence and fairness are just such terrible factors with which to judge collegiate opportunity. Does your daddy have the money is really the only important gauge of admission…

  • WIDTAP

    I know many of us see this as support of racism, but I suggest that it is more insidious. It is support of Millennialism. Dammit, those mediocre kids are entitled to the university admission slots – didn’t you see their participation trophy?

  • Jenny

    So should I start checking the caucasian box instead of latino now, or what?

    Also I’ve encouraged my daughter to start competitive swim for college opportunities for her future art/teacher/animator degree. But since she’s 3/4 white, maybe it won’t matter!1!111

  • Antonin Dvorak

    I can’t find a clip of it, but I am reminded of a joke on Laugh-In during Dan’s “News of the Future” segments; where he reports that the governor of Arkansas welcomes the U of Arkansas’ first white student in over thirty years.

  • exinkwretch

    “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their bank accounts.” — Rep. Steve Luther King

  • Or, and I know this is crazy, the kids that get rejected from one university could apply to another university or go to J.C. for two years and transfer over to their state university.

    For the most part, no one gives a fuck about where you went to college once you get into the business world. And if they do, they’re insufferable twats you wouldn’t want to work for anyway.

    • WIDTAP

      Even the insufferable twats only care about which college your degree came from, not how many J.C.s and other college you damn near flunked out of before you transferred for the degree.

    • Manders

      IKR!!!!!

      I have just never understood how people can go through the process for application to very competitive schools and come away thinking it is anything other than chance that you didn’t get in.

    • OutOfOrbit

      and diploma from “ivy League” like HARVARD dount mean squat cuz with enough $$$, you could by one for your back door knob

      • Relativicus

        It’s not the diploma that’s valuable. It’s who your family and friends were/are. The diploma is just expected.

    • Buzz1313

      This is what an aunt of mine did. She went to a satellite college here in NE Indiana for a few semesters then transferred to Harvard. Young people don’t get it because they’re stuck in a high school mentality. They think once you apply to a four year college, you’re stuck there.

  • Bub, the cynical zombie
  • Randy Riddle

    I fully expect Sessions to have the Justice Department prosecuting people for sodomy in the next couple of weeks.

    • ariel_gee_398

      I mean, why should conservative advocacy groups waste valuable money challenging established Supreme Court precedent when the Justice Department is willing to do it for them?

      • Major_Major_Major

        Now sir, could you please demonstrate to the court exactly what you were doing. (wipes brow with hanky) One more time, so the court can, erm, fully observe what you were up too. Maybe, once more…–the AG from the holler tree

    • natoslug

      As long as there’s no punishment for rum and the lash, we’re still ahead. Still, an evening with the wife and a few select friends with rum and the lash, sans-sodomy, just doesn’t sound as much fun. Damn you, Jefferson B. Sessions the Turd!

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      While I continue to work with my indivisible group, make the phone calls, send the post cards, etc, I hope that this is all the last gasp of a dying dinosaur- a bunch of people who simply refuse to let go.

  • Manders

    So, when I applied to college, back in the 90s, when the admissions process was competitive but not quite as bananas as it is now, I got into all of my schools, including one I applied to early admission. All except the school I really wanted to go to. I was third in my class, did a ton of activities and won a bunch of awards, so I was pretty competitive, but for whatever reason, the school I was positive I wanted to attend didn’t take me.

    So I went somewhere else.

    When my brother applied two years later, he ALSO got into nearly all the schools he applied to, except the one I was then attending. He was a slightly poorer student (though no less smart) and hadn’t dedicated himself in every class. He moaned and whined about meritocracy and affirmative action and became a libertarian.

    I’m not sure what the difference is there; is it because I’m a woman that it never occurred to me not to feel insulted that I wasn’t admitted? Was it because he was younger? Who knows. My brother is basically a decent person and not a Trump supporter, but I’ll never understand that attitude.

    • WIDTAP

      We all need excuses for our own choices.

      • Oblios_Cap

        That’s what religion is for.

        • JJ O’Shaughnessy

          You mean Astrology.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      “He moaned and whined about meritocracy and affirmative action and became a libertarian”. That sentence explains a lot about our society.

  • therblig

    “You just called me a redneck, which I’m proud to say I am, and you, Hodgkiss, are a honky! You just look black, and it’s the best part of ya! Lets you intimidate the palefaces, especially lib-labs, and lets ya work that voodoo sexual shit on white girls. Well, I’m probably blacker than you are. I got some slave in me. I can feel it.” – Richard Jemmons, “Primary Colors”

  • natoslug

    The problem with this change is that it doesn’t go far enough. This country went downhill the minute we allowed women the right to vote. The white man will only have a fair shake in America when we repeal the 13th, 15th and 19th Amendments. And gods help us if those commie liebrul bastards ever get the Child Labor Amendment ratified. If working in mines, factories and fields was good enough for our grandparents, it’s damn well good enough for other people’s grandchildren!

    • Three Finger Salute

      Shirley you jest, but that’s exactly what the Mercers are trying to achieve with their hoped-for constitutional convention.

      • jesterpunk

        Ann Coulter has been pushing for years to get rid of women right to vote.

  • You should ice that burn

    Isn’t this a glaring example of using the DOJ and government workers for political purposes? I thought that was a no-no.

    • BadKitty904

      IOKIYAR…

    • Les Appentis De la résistance

      Well, the democrats elected a black guy. How is that fair?

    • jesterpunk

      Its only bad if it negatively affects White Christian Men.

  • therblig

    Whenever I would travel and people would ask me where I was from, I would always say, “I’m just another white guy”. Then I sent my DNA to Ancestry and what a surprise – it turns out I’m 80% white guy, 15% klingon, and 5% lizard people. Now, when I fill out a form, I check the box that says “Whatever”.

    • SadDemInTex

      We should all check “other” and put in Human

      • Zyxomma

        When I went for a breast sonogram at the radiology department of a superb Manhattan hospital, I went early so I could fill out forms. Where it said “race” I ignored all the choices and wrote in HUMAN.

  • Jenny

    My ex husband told my son he didn’t make it to the NBA cux he couldn’t compete with black people. The dude had a full ride college scholarship for basketball despite being illiterate and unable to math at a high school level. Still, wasn’t good enough for him.

    The lesson learned, never blame yourself for your own failings when you can blame it on someone else!

    No worries. I told the boy that black people didn’t stop daddy from reaching the NBA. Daddy just isn’t as great as he thinks he is.

    • Major_Major_Major

      The lesson learned, never blame yourself for your own failings when you can blame it on someone else!. The Republican Way

      • Courser_Resistance

        I’m so fucking tired of that shit. It’s like the White People Disease. They never do anything wrong, the world is stacked against them.

        I’m eternally grateful that my parents and grandparents never let me get away with that shit. Us kids were always held responsible for our own shitty decisions from an early age. Even as toddlers, if we made a mess, we had to clean it up (or at least make an effort; help then provided). If little brother makes a mess I still have to help clean it up because I knew better than to let him.

        ETA: sorry bout the present tense. Both little brothers have been cleaning up their own messes for a long time now :-)

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      It’s terrible that great white players like Larry Bird, Kevin McHale, and Bill Walton were never given a chance in the NBA.

      • Jenny

        There’s that one white guy Steve Nash…I bet he didn’t get anywhere!

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          And Canadian too! They ran him off the first day he tried out.

          • Three Finger Salute

            He picked the wrong sport! Canadians are only eligible for hockey!

            (NB: You should see what the ‘channers and their ilk have to say about P.K. Subban. Actually, no you shouldn’t. Suffice it to say, It’s not polite.)

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Yeah, I REALLY don’t want to know about that.

          • Major_Major_Major

            He should have stuck to swimming, because he dives like a champion?

            Bruins fan, couldn’t resist, and yeah I have heard ALL that shit.

      • Three Finger Salute

        I know, who ever heard of Bob Cousy besides his career as a pitchman for hi-top sneakers? I seem to remember this other guy named John Stockton or something but I don’t think he lasted too long.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          Remember that Jerry West dude? Fuck that guy.

          • Three Finger Salute

            I know, and while we’re at it, let’s talk about all the great white football players who never got a chance to play quarterback in the NFL! Nobody remembers Dan Marino or Terry Bradshaw! They couldn’t even get jobs as sports broadcast analysts when their careers were over! Peyton Manning can’t even find work in TV commercials!

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Right? Peyton would’ve been the perfect pitch man for something like Papa John’s pizza, but the poor guy can’t catch a break. I hear they’re giving the job to Colin Kaepernick.

    • therblig

      years ago, i remember hearing bill bradley talking to a bunch of high school athletes and telling them that there were something like a million high school basketball players competing for 10,000 college team spots, competing for 300 NBA spots, so they had better take their education seriously. seemed like good advice. i wonder how many listened.

      • Steve Cole

        “NO PLAN B!”

        • Major_Major_Major

          Plan B is for losers

          • formerChild

            “You’re the plan B!”

      • I’ve always like Bill Bradley.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      You know, your ex sounds like a regular bouquet of cautionary parables.

      • Jenny

        Well he had a tennis court and jr olympic pool on his property but his parents wouldn’t install an indoor basketball court so he could practice year round. But his sister got her own indoor horse arena. UNFAIR! So really his parents are to blame!!!

        • Raan

          Oh, yeah, I’m sure having an indoor court would have made him more dedicated than the kids who had to go practice on the public courts, regardless of weather.

          • Jenny

            I know right? He had this horse arena, a tennis court, a swimming pool, and a golf course. Tennis was the only other sport he was proficient enough in to win trophies in. I think his sister carried him in tournaments.

      • SeeTrain65

        “A shining ray of sunstroke.”

    • Moar Wordz

      He seems smart !

  • TheGrandWazoo2

    GOP Senate:
    ☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
    ☺☺☺☺☺☻☺☺☺
    ☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
    ☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
    ☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
    ☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
    So unfair to the white people.

    • Three Finger Salute

      The presidency:

      👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻
      👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻
      👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏾 🎃

  • Bright Bart

    the “personal achievement index” is disproportionately over-weighted by “participation” awards. A lot of people don’t know that.

  • (((fka_donnie_d)))

    You know what? I think this is actually good news. It’s past time we had a Nice, Big National Conversation about why we needed AA* in the first place. Let’s drag the frats, legacy enrollment, and all the other bullshit out into the light of day.

    *Affirmative Action, not Alcoholics Anonymous. You lush.

    • Buzz1313

      Thank you! Why is it these people never go after legacy enrollments but are CONVINCED some unqualified black student is stealing “their” spot? Do they really think black students with D averages and low GPA’s are taking the slots of straight A white students?

      • (((fka_donnie_d)))

        Rich white people >> Black people

        Always.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    This angers me.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Just because you helped a an African American young lady from a non-functioning home through college and into adulthood doesn’t give you the right to question Jeff Sessions.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        She did the doing part herself. I just did the burdening the next generation with the expectations of an italian mother part :)

        Besides, I’m an old white lady. Don’t I get to arrogate any rights to myself that seem convenient?

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          As long as there is some guilt involved, it’s all good.

          And yes, please feel free to cut in front of me in the checkout line at the supermarket any time you want.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            I see those videos of people abreacting in stores and I wonder how bad your life can possibly be that you feel like you need that win over a random passerby.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            I find it fascinating to observe social behavior at places like four-way traffic stops and lines at Costco. It often seems to be that the difference between a relatively efficient exercise in mutually beneficial social cooperation and an instant example of the tragedy of commons can hinge on the actions of one selfish, entitled libertarian being an asshole. When that happens, it all goes to shit almost immediately.

            I’ve at times been tempted to confront the occasional hate mobile-driving Republican at Costco. I mean, they have nothing but contempt for the principles the whole company is organized under, yet they’ll toss those to the dogs to save a few bucks. They should be sentenced to Sam’s Club for life.

  • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

    OT: Bring us your well off, highly skilled, yearning for positions at a lower wage than already Americans…

    “Our current immigration system is outdated and doesn’t meet the diverse [a.k.a.: White] needs of our economy. … And we don’t prioritize ultra-high-skilled immigrants. We need an immigration system that meets the current needs of our workforce and encourages innovation,” another White House official said in a statement. “Today, Senator Cotton and Senator Perdue will join President Trump to unveil legislation aimed at creating a skills-based immigration system that will make America more competitive, raise wages for American workers, and create jobs.”

    http://www.cnn.com/2017/08/02/politics/trump-skills-immigration-plan-cotton-perdue/index.html

    • (((fka_donnie_d)))

      In other words, we don’t want illeagles taking our blue-collar jobs, just our white-collar ones.

      Guess which people are more likely to have a college degree (and therefore) not like Trump much.

      • Three Finger Salute

        Won’t matter anyway in terms of “saving jobs.” This country has its head in the sand if they don’t think Chinese-made robots are going to replace those blue-collar jobs en masse by the end of the decade. We’re going to see a resurgence of Luddism and probably another Unabomber arising out of this. The U.S. will never implement a mincome program, because it sounds too much like “welfare.” George Carlin didn’t include enough dirty words in his standup act. The words “social” and “welfare” are tied for the title of #1 swear word in American society.

        • (((fka_donnie_d)))

          I mean, he wants people to think the coal jobs aren’t going anywhere, for fucks sake. Like, those mines are infinite, or something.

          • Cleo_Cat

            And don’t we all want our children to work in the mines!?!

          • (((fka_donnie_d)))

            It never ceases to amaze, how stupid hews so closely to evil. There is never even the ghost, the promise of a smell test. To answer your point specifically, even if we were all over the moon about our offspring’s job prospects in the mineral extraction industry, the coal mine is simply not infinite.

            Tomorrow, he will begin to attempt to exercise eminent domain over peoples houses because there is coal under them.

    • Raan

      You know what would raise wages for American workers?

      Raising wages for American workers.

      • Moar Wordz

        Most people who don’t want to raise wages for American workers have never done a lick of poorly paid manual labor in their lives

    • Three Finger Salute

      One senator’s name is Cotton and the other shares his name with a famous chicken farmer. You can’t make this up. To paraphrase Justin Trudeau’s onetime classmate, Chanandler Bong, “Could you BE any more hillbilly?”

      Oh, and asshole, that’s not what Canada does and you know it. They don’t have racial quotas in their skills-based immigration system. Skills are skills, regardless of whether your name is Mike, Maurice, Maria, Maryam, or Muhammad.

      This is what they’re after as the Holy Grail of “making America great again.” The longtime GOP boogeyman Ted Kennedy heavily promoted it, and a popular meme is that he “exploited” the family name and death of his brother to get this “Jewish communist bill” rushed through Congress. Alt-reichists usually spell Emmanuel Celler with the requisite ((( parentheses ))) around his name.

      • The Flaming Carrot

        The first senator also shares his name . . . with Cotton Mather, advocate of Salem Witch Trials.

    • So….we’re going to import all the ultra high skilled workers and that will raises wages for Americans…how?

  • Why don’t their parents just build the college a liberry or sportsball arena to secure ’em a place?

    • Three Finger Salute

      It’d have to be a sportsball arena or rock climbing wall. Lie Berries are for communists. Unless the only book on the shelves is the Bible.

    • Moar Wordz

      Omigod ! I thought all those buildins’ w/ special names at Harvard and Yale was a kind of blue – blood genealogy project ! Anyone w/ me on that ?!
      It’s blue-chip investment that exponentially increases over the years, but with wasp progeny…instead of academic merit.
      They just fingerprint them and pull a hair from their upturned noses and do some DNA testing and wave them in.

  • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

    Long essay, but Jim Wright is angry, and he is at his eloquent best
    http://www.stonekettle.com/2017/08/the-later-days-of-better-nation-part-iv.html

  • azeyote

    white people are so discriminated against in their entitlements and privileges –

  • doktorzoom

    Also, though I link it in the main post, be sure to check out this thread by Ashley Ford about that time at summer camp when… she found out all the white counselors assumed black people get to go to college for free.
    https://twitter.com/iSmashFizzle/status/892557827675480064

    • Zyxomma

      Thanks for that.

    • nightmoth

      Interesting. I have a neighbor who believed that people from India are given a special no-taxes pass to buy convenience stores in America. I Snoped him on it, but he still won’t shop at Mr. Patel’s.

      • Moar Wordz

        He must have to 🚗 all over fucking creation to avoid Mr.Patel’s. Does he have long -range telefoto lens to verify the beigeness of the owners? Maybe incense sniffing 🐕’s ?

        • nightmoth

          Too right–lol! It must be like “Smith” in the USA. There’s even a funny documentary called “Meet the Patels” by a young filmmaker named, of course, Patel.

          • Moar Wordz

            Lol. I realized I meant
            ” Pinkness, ” not ” beigeness ” when referring to his preferred choice. Indians of course aren’t beige but rather lovely permutations of – I can’t describe their color, maybe variations of mahagony from Tamil 🍫 to Sikh Sandalwood. O.K. That sounded like a catalogue description of tea towels but I’m trying here…I just keep stumbling willy-nilly into offensive terms with colonial flavor – shite ! O.K, some one point a PC finger now. Oh hell…

            I saw the trailer for Meet the Patels. There was a similarly themed film made in Britain. It was one of the most hilarious fucking movies I’ve ever seen but still managed to be edgy at the same time, a quality American Comedies can seriously LACK.

    • Fitzgerald Chesterfield

      I wonder if these people think that black people get the best terms on bank loans, also, too.

      • Moar Wordz

        OmiGod ! They *do* get the best bank term loans – the ones set up to fail ?

    • Relativicus

      It’s roughly the same number of people who, when speaking of proposals to ensure that anyone who wants to go to college can go to college, say that there’s no such thing as a “free” education.

  • Relativicus

    I think Teh G-heeeeeyyyyyyys should be very worried about that particular turn. With these Supremes, an argument saying “When the Civil Rights Act was being debated, nobody but nobody was talking about fabulous people; it was all Darkies all the time” has a very good chance of winning the day. And I recommend against holding any breath for this Congress to act to rectify the matter should the USSC say sexual preference is not currently covered.

  • Mavenmaven

    Perhaps they should open special colleges for white people only. Perhaps we can call them… Trump University?

    • Three Finger Salute

      That’s orange people. Their varsity sportsball squad is called the Trumpa Lumpas.

      • Raan

        And thanks to a Justice Dept ruling, they get to ride around the bases in a golf cart.

  • Just last week, it seems, a lot of us were, to our unending shock, rooting for Jeffery Beauregard Ahhh-Magnolias Sessions, since Trump was trying to screw him because of that one decent choice he made. Welp, there’s all that sympathy knackered, then, innit?

    • For the record, I was never rooting for him. Ever.

      • Well, you called it, then; good on ya. And weren’t you “Abby Normal Jen” as recently as yesterday? I ask because a _Young Frankenstein_ mic-check is always a positive indice.

  • Clegg’s take is fun: “It’s not just white people, it’s…um…Asian-Americans! Yeah! Them too! *They’re* not white, and we’re trying to help them! Huh? Huh? So good at math, those p–THEY are…”
    It’s as if the Fred Willard character from one of those Chris Guest mockumentaries became a real live boy.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      The sad thing is, of course, that if they remove any kind of attempt to level the playing field, or get brilliant minds from unexpected places that may have not had the same opportunities in their public high schools, the “white” folk will be instantly crowded out by those very same Asian-Americans. And Fred Willard, SO hilarious, always. At the dog show, after a long discourse on how beautiful that particular breed is, (pause) … “…and to think, in Korea, they eat them.”

  • jesuswasablack

    Everyone knows white folk just can’t catch a break, the blacks and browns are always stealing all the good jobs, just look at how many minorities have risen to the highest office in the land!
    https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-sa-Qne2fmqI/WJG_9Nw7r2I/AAAAAAAAEnQ/WTymGCDUly0RInoShJbOey0RXIzx2B8tgCLcB/s640/united-states-president-list-2017.jpg

    • Three Finger Salute

      Well, there was that one Catholic guy. And, uh… the really tall one. People are going to be talking a lot about him. And B-movie cowboys, won’t someone PLEASE think of the B-movie cowboys?!?!?

      • SomeBigRedDog

        DON’T FORGET ABOUT THE CHEETO-AMERICAN!

        • Three Finger Salute

          I posted this below but I think it merits mentioning again:

          The presidency, a chart in emoji

          👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻

          👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻

          👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏻 👦🏾 🎃

          • WIDTAP

            Yes. Our first Pumpkin-American President.

          • boredcatlady

            It’s kind of fitting to think of him like the masks from Halloween 3.

      • boredcatlady

        And wimmins have had it waaaaaaay too easy, if you ask me ;)

  • The Flaming Carrot

    Good show. What this country needs is Milo Yiannopoulos University for Middle Class White Boys Who are Disadvantaged by Feminism and White Genocide.

    • The Wanderer

      It’s well-known for the rotating knives in the front entryway, along with the state of the art oven and shower facilities.

      • SkinlessGenderlessMan

        Is that the one that catches fire during the architectural demo?

    • boredcatlady

      You can major in Affluenza with a concentration in Street Harassment!

    • Moar Wordz

      ” BroDude University. “

  • Saxo the Grammarian

    Colleges and universities are allowing wimmen, furrin students, and cullerd people to bust their butts to get degrees, while denying white guys their RIGHT! to join fraternities, have keggers, and drink beer with no shirtz on! NOT FAIR!!!!!!!

    This aggression shall not stand, man!

    • Opiwan

      We’re not gonna protest! WE’RE NOT GONNA PROTEST!

      • CthulhuSleeps

        Love that movie…

  • UnsaltedSinner
  • Bebecca

    Oh great, Sessions is never going to get fired now.

  • WIDTAP
    • The Flaming Carrot

      In the 5 seconds it took this nut to post, Lil’ Carrot squinted and said “at first, they look like abayas, but they’re actually empty bus seats.”

      • WIDTAP

        Probably was bright yellow the seat handles that gave it away.

    • Bitter Scribe

      I wonder what those Norweigan right-wing anti-immigrant groups think about Brevik? Lone-wolf nutcase, false-flag agent provocateur or hero (like Debbie Shitstel or however it’s spelled)?

  • Ill-Advised

    Does this mean that if I dial tech support and hear “entre nueve para inglés,” I can file a complaint- even though I understood it?

    What about Hindi & Tamil? I am constantly being oppressed by Indian recruiters who can’t tell me who they work for, explain jobs intelligibly, or tell their work colleagues that I’ve already been solicited.

  • SisterArtemis

    well, this is the first thing that popped into my mind when I finished Dok’s post:
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/a6fb9ab43e02fa79559365063ac94ac11ad3e609aaac0d199d5b41154155e50f.jpg

    • Portia McGonagal

      I am “creatively appropriating” aka stealing this!

    • boredcatlady

      Yeah I’m gonna have to borrow that one, it’s so true. People are super-judgy too, if the placard-haver’s disability isn’t as apparent as using a wheelchair.

    • SeeTrain65

      “And I thought it would be interesting to steal … er, to ADAPT this meme regarding the subject at hand.”

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Bringing up Asian-Americans too is the civil rights version of adding “Judeo” to “Christian” to make it sound like you do TOO understand the concept of civil rights.

    • Bitter Scribe

      Or a way of patting them on the head and telling them they’re a “model minority,” which they just LOVE.

  • CripesAmighty

    And in related news, Adolph Eichmann clone Stephen Miller is expounding the virtues of the new, ‘Rich, white, techbros only’ immigration policy. Reverse Lebensraum, indeed.

  • Daniel Hooper

    Gah; I hate crap like this. Just reading it word for word it seems legit, but you KNOW it’s a cover so they discriminate against non whites; you just can’t prove it.

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    i would almost swear to you i’ve been on the porch in that photo.

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    i don’t know if its still that way, but not getting into UT really is sad. It was my backup school 20+ years ago.

  • Dazza

    The Justice Department under Sessions has prompted me to be a lot more supportive (in a financial sense) of the ACLU, the NAACP and the SPLC.

    Way to go Jeffy. You got an Australian angry enough to get off the couch and support anyone opposed to you. We hardly ever get off the sofa during the football/rugby season.

  • Love the bit of afterthought pandering to asian americans. Cute.

  • WIDTAP

    Justice Department now saying it was a job posting, not a new policy.

    DOJ Spokeswoman Sarah Isgur Flores refuted the report in a statement Wednesday evening.

    “Press reports regarding the personnel posting in the Civil Rights Division have been inaccurate,” she said. “The posting sought volunteers to investigate one administrative complaint filed by a coalition of 64 Asian-American associations in May 2015 that the prior administration left unresolved.

    “The complaint alleges racial discrimination against Asian Americans in a university’s admissions policy and practices. This Department of Justice has not received or issued any directive, memorandum, initiative, or policy related to university admissions in general. The Department of Justice is committed to protecting all Americans from all forms of illegal race-based discrimination,” she said.

    http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/justice-department-denies-personnel-posting-reflects-policy-affirmative/story?id=48987401

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    Yes indeed, we really need to take a long, hard look at these cases where someone gets admitted to a prestigious school for reasons other than merit…

    https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/2017/8/2/16084226/jared-kushner-harvard-affirmative-action

  • Jennifercstewart

    Golden29a

    Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !au269d:
    On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
    !au269d:
    ➽➽
    ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash559SportMulti/Pay$97/Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::!au269l..,.

  • hyperbola

    In virtually all western democracies it is forbidden for government agencies and others to classify people by race. In these countries, people would protest violently if a “census” required them to state their race. In the US the “racism” issue is actively promoted by “our” media (and the sect who own it) and used as a means to keep Americans dumb, distracted, divided and easy to rob/manipulate. “Divide and conquer” has been a common tool of “elite control” for millenia. Here we see that it still works well in “modern, educated” America.

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