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Morning Wonketariat! Here’s some of the things we may be talking about today.

During the G20, Putin and Trump had private one-on-one snoggings for over an hour during a dinner with the other 18 member nations. I wonder what they talked about…for an hour…in private…with only a Russian translator. [Morning Maddow]

Mitch McConnell will still hold a vote to repeal Obamacare/the ACA next week even though it’s expected to fail miserably.

Trump says he’s willing to let insurance markets collapse to teach Democrats a lesson. Personally, we’re not sure what that lesson is.

California Republican Rep. Dana Rohrabacher was given secret documents by Moscow officials and attempted to scuttle the Magnitsky Act. That’s a hell of a story right there, you go read now.

The new GOP budget plan wants to reform “civil service pensions to put them on a better fiscal path,” which is just legalese for “fuck you, your pension, and your retirement benefits.”

A casino consultant tapped to work in the State Department’s J-Bureau is listed as on leave by his former/current firm. It’s not a conflict of interest, stop saying it’s a conflict of interest!

A court has ruled that Trump’s voter commission can start today as long as it’s streamed online. It sounds like a hot ticket too as the cast of characters includes a bevy of anti-immigrant nutjobs and genuine morans.

Trump’s White House wants a corporate tax rate of 20 to 25 percent, and they’re quietly leaking out Trump’s trickle down policies.

Behind the scenes, Princess Ivanka is working with international institutions, like the IMF and World Bank, to keep pulling the levers of soft power.

Trump’s golf course in LA is doing REALLY badly as Los Angelenos don’t want to be seen anywhere near Trump’s trash palace.

Trump has four new hotels set to open in Mississippi and while they won’t carry his name, they’ll be founded on sketchy business ties and full of gaudy crap they’re calling “flea-market chic.”

Mark Zuckerberg was denied a meeting with the top climate researcher at Glacier National Park by the Interior Department, but he was cleared to meet with their mascot, Gracie the “bark ranger.”

Trump’s White House has nominated Jon Huntsman as the Russian ambassador, after getting his name wrong in the official press release.

Trump finds Afghanistan “hard,” but the good news is that it looks like Mattis has scrapped Erik Prince’s plans.

A group of moms in Baltimore are calling for a 72-hour ceasefire by walking into open-air drug markets and directly confronting dealers.

Disgraced former Republican Governor of Alabama Robert Bentley thinks he was their best governor ever, and he would have gotten so much done if people weren’t so concerned about his sex times, his sexting, his sexy voicemails, and the sex money.

A BYU professor was ALLEGEDLY “You’re Fired” for her refusal to delete a post about how she thinks God is cool with gay and trans people on her private Facebook page. Leave it to the LDS to condem someone to — hello!

Several female robotics teams had problems getting visas, but that Afghani girls team stole the spotlight from all the other robots, even if they didn’t finish in the top three.

A British advertising regulator has issued new rules to ban ads with gender stereotypes, that objectify women, or that promote unhealthy body images. First they ruin science fiction and robots, now they’re coming for our sexually explicit advertising!

A South Korean human rights group wants to start looking for North Korean mass graves by using defectors and Interwebs, even if it seems like nobody cares. :(

Chris Cillizza held a disastrous Reddit AMA yesterday and redditors called him out for being a genuine piece of shit without ethics.

Tucker Carlson is hot on the trail of America’s latest threat to Democracy: gypsies. They’re pooping in the streets and kidnapping babby!

The NRA has a new video trashing the Washington Post and other media outlets as “violent,” which is a little ironic as it comes across as a veiled death threat to reporters.

Former Republican Speaker, convicted fraudster, and pederast Dennis Hastert was released from prison early.

Yesterday, Fox’s John Roberts bailed out in the middle of another off-camera press briefing and told Sarah Huckabee Sanders to fuck off when she tried to make a joke at his expense.

Breitbart’s White House Reporter is actually taking his job seriously and asking legit policy questions during press briefings. Of course, this wouldn’t even be a story if it weren’t Breitbart.

Chris Christie tried dancing around Nicolle Wallace on teevee, but he carries so much baggage for Trump that it looked like the Truffle Shuffle.

Donald Trump Jr. is reportedly “miserable” and is just waiting out the next four years, or for his father to be impeached, whichever comes first.

GOOD NEWS, EVERYONE! Here’s a heckin’ good doggo who saved a deer from drowning off Long Island this past weekend.

And here’s your late night wrap-up! The Daily Show wrapped up the life and death of zombie TrumpCare; Seth Meyers had talkytime with New York AG Eric Schneiderman about suing Trump; Stephen Colbert had Keegan-Michael Key bring Obama’s anger translator out of retirement.

And here’s your morning Nice Time! Lion cubs!

Hey, everyone! We need you (yes you!) to donate so we can keep giving you all the things! ALL THE THINGS!

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  • Nounverb911
    • Gross, it’s a fucking K-cup

      • OutOfOrbit

        Wow 2 upvotes in one, bebbee a firstie for me.

      • Augustus

        There could be a bean reservoir and automatic grinder in there, you never know

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    “Thousands of healthy people paid by Dems to act sick at TrumpCare FAKE protests. Media doesn’t investigate. WHY?!” #DeletedTrumpTweets

  • Nounverb911
  • Nounverb911
    • ltmcdies

      Must have been a particularly difficult dump Donnie was taking this morning

    • ariel_gee_398

      Is John McCain’s ramble-inducing brain clot catching?

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      This was followed by “I’ve run out of toilet paper again. SAD!”

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      My gawd, what the FUCK is wrong with him????

      • ariel_gee_398

        For a start, he seems to fail to realize that he’s a Republican and “their” bill is “his” bill.

        • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

          Oh, this isn’t a failure to realize, it’s Management 201: If it’s good, take credit; if it’s shit, your underlings failed you.

          • bupkus231

            I doubt Rump ever got as far as a 200-level course – he just filled out his time at Wharton with all the introductory courses he could pay nerds to take for him…

      • Komsumverweigerer Ron
        • “M”

          Anybody else more than slightly unnerved that there’s more than one morbidity to choose from …?

    • Panika MCD

      it’s true because there is nothing good to discuss. they can’t even pretend that anything in their bipl is good.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      “Dems scream death”

      Pretend everyone on Obamacare and Medicaid and Medicare is Terri Schiavo.

    • MizzMazz

      “Time is an illusion. Lunchtime, doubly so.” Ford Prefect.

    • What’s happening at lunch?

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    Trump gave Putin launch codes, names of our spies, Trump Tower taco bowl recipe and tons of other classified information. PROVE HE DIDN’T!

  • Nounverb911
  • Nounverb911
    • Dorothybchavez

      Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !pz205d:
      On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
      !pz205d:
      ➽➽
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  • Nounverb911
    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      Love the McD’s on the table!

      • Komsumverweigerer Ron

        For maximum effect, Donnie’s should have been a Happy Meal.

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    Donald Trump Jr. is reportedly “miserable”…

    Like father, like son. Little Babby Donnie has been angry for the past 99 years.

  • Gee, Your Hair Smells Horrific

    https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/887475373981696000
    I’m guessing “Fake News” like how the Trump Campaign never met with Russians.
    Turd.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Trump told Putin our secrets. Many, many secrets.

      • aureolaborealis

        On the plus side, I’m betting that his scattered ‘intellect’ and terrible memory make him a sub-optimal source for detailed classified information.

    • Augustus

      The phrase “Fake News” has really lost its luster since he started using it for everything, all day, every day.

      • YoBunnyBunny

        Well, look how long it took him to stop (he hasn’t stopped) making Elizabeth Warren/Pocahontas jokes. He really is That Guy who doesn’t know when his favorite tune has been played out.

    • Opalescent Riddles

      NOBODY (that I’ve heard) alleged a “secret dinner”, only an extended, unscheduled meeting at the dinner. So Dumpy is putting fake words in others’ mouths and ridiculing the fakeness.

      So dishonest! Unpresidented! Sad!

  • Nounverb911
    • OutOfOrbit

      “You guys are takers, a burden on us job-creators.”

  • onedollarjuana

    I’m trying to figure out what’s wrong with Pence. Why is he so squinty? Are his shoes too tight? His hair too tight? Does he have terminal hemorrhoids? Is it just decades of blue balls?

  • Nounverb911
  • OutOfOrbit

    After the tRumPutin secret meeting, I would be scared shitless–were I a secret agent or double agent for the US or one of its allies.

    • 🛶🗣️ Mr Canoehead 🛶🗣️

      Thank goodness his phone is probably hacked; at least someone will have a record of it.

  • memzilla Ω

    Here’s another interesting point made by Bill Palmer and John Schindler: interpreters. Dolt 45 brought a Japanese interpreter as he was paired up with Shinzo Abe. Putin brought an English translator — but Putin speaks English (he just doesn’t let on that he does). So unless Putin was planning on having a heart-to-heart with Theresa May or Emmanuel Macron or Justin Trudeau, why would he choose to bring an English-Russian translator? Unless the meeting was pre-arranged ahead of time?

    • You’re not the first person to make that assessment.

    • Monsieur_Grumpe

      Pee tape pay off?

    • PubOption

      I suspect that Veselnitskaya speaks english as well. (As well as Trump, that is.)

      • Bozilingus

        My dog speaks as well as tRump, with a larger vocabulary. He knows that the high grass on a golf course is the rough, that the top of a house has a roof, and that the greatest baseball player was Ruth.

        • MizzMazz

          And your dog would be a better president too. Good doggie!

        • From Russia with Love

          Trump probably shits on the lawn about the same amount as your dog.

          • Bozilingus

            Yeah, but I at least clean up after my dog. The American public will spend years cleaning up after tRump.

        • 🛶🗣️ Mr Canoehead 🛶🗣️

          And the threads running back and forth in a loom? Woof.

      • cmd resistor

        Everybody speaks English. Many better than Trump.

    • Doug Langley

      My understanding is that both sides must provide a translator, and since Trump didn’t, he’s in violation of protocol. Correct?

      • memzilla Ω

        Each leader was allowed to bring one translator for the person they were teamed up with at G20, but yes, US protocol is for each side to have a translator, so Twitler was indeed in violation.

    • Bozilingus

      Putin needed someone to record the conversation.

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      The housemate and I were discussing that last night. There’s something VERY hinky about that second meeting, but will we ever find out what it was all about?

      • From Russia with Love

        Yes, Trump will accidentally spill the beans in a rage tweet within two weeks.

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    Y’all, I’m sick of so much winning. Let’s try losing.
    – McTraitor, Twitler, et al.

  • Crystalclear12

    Yep, another pro-alcohol and denial day.

    • From Russia with Love

      Time to change your handle to Everclear.

    • grindstone

      Is it Wednesday already?

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg

    Trump says he’s willing to let insurance markets collapse to teach Democrats a lesson. Personally, we’re not sure what that lesson is.

    That no matter if you believe in Jebus, the anti-christ is real and in real estate.

    • Panika MCD

      isn’t the anti-Christ supposed tp be charismatic and bring in the apocalypse by finally letting the Jews build a third temple on the Dome of the Rock?

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        Well with Jared we have the Jew builder. Maybe we are looking in the wrong direction. Isn’t Paul Ryan considered charismatic? And who will become preznit when the peep and the veep go to jail?

        • Panika MCD

          I wouldn’t accuse Paul Ryan of being “charasmatic”. it’s not a muscle that P90X works.

        • bupkus231

          ” Isn’t Paul Ryan considered charismatic?”

          LO fuckin’ L!!!!

    • Crystalclear12

      The lesson is:
      Next time VOTE!

      2018.

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        I probably have a better chance of getting to vote in your elections than the average black guy in a red state so why not give it a try huh?

        • Wild Cat

          The minute you land on US shores, you have more civil rights than a black person descended from a family that has lived here for centuries.

          • Robbertjan Brandenburg

            Oh I noticed that back in 2007 when we visited Florida. As soon as people found out we were from Amsterdam drinks were on the house and in stores people went the extra mile to help us.

          • Wild Cat

            About 15 years ago I was offered a free drink in a bar on Overtoom because the young bartender was happy to see a white person. He was resentful of Amsterdam becoming brown and Muslim.
            It struck me as strange, as Overtoom is fairly well off.

          • Robbertjan Brandenburg

            Well Overtoom has a large community of Moroccans and Turkish people but everyone is getting along just fine. Yuo always have racist bastards though.

          • Wild Cat

            I guess he’s 40 now and a Wilders supporter, if he’s still the same sort of person.
            Yeah, in October I needed some late-night snacks and beer and found a Middle-east owned grocery on Overtoom that stayed open overnight. It’s now a nice mixture of trendy shops and Muslim-owned small shops. Like my town, NYC.

          • Robbertjan Brandenburg

            Yup, there really is no bad neighbourhood in Amsterdam and Utrecht anymore and Rotterdam and The Hague are following suit.

  • Bureaucrap

    “We were just trading some gossip about some mutual friends in the Russian mafia — Excuse me, I mean the ‘Russian-American Friendship League’.”

  • Nounverb911
    • alwayspunkindrublic

      But he’ll go ahead and vote for all of Trump’s nominees and agenda.

    • Oh, man, I forgot this one!

      • Crystalclear12

        When shoveling this much bs it’s easy to miss one pile.
        Brave lady, tho.

    • grindstone

      The bar of civility has been set so low that this little act of simple humanity is enough to brighten my day.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        This is what we’ve come to, innit? Republicans are applauded for meeting the bare minimum standard for human decency.

        • CripesAmighty

          Yah, but this is a big fat Fuck You to the Trumpanzees. For that alone, good on Jeff.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            I hope so. Flake is one of those exasperating Republicans who occasionally seems rational and vaguely human, only to endorse the most rightwing dickheaded policies at the end of the day. He’s already in Trump’s crosshairs, so maybe he’s having a come-to-Jesus moment.

    • bupkus231

      Wait ’til she wins the Dem primary, and campaign season starts to heat up – I’m sure the Flake campaign ( if he’s not primaried out the race by then ) will get hateful and shitheaded soon enough…

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Why is Dana Rohrabacher still chair of the House Foreign Affairs Subcommittee on Europe?

    • We’re not saying it’s aliens…

      but it’s fucking aliens.

    • Panika MCD

      because there’s not one for Mars.

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      Well, he DOES seem to have a great deal of experience in foreign affairs. Granted, they’re all with Russia, but still…

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    How long before Denny Hastert shows up on prime time as a “Fox News expert”?

    • ariel_gee_398

      As long as the studio isn’t within 100 yards of a school, playground, or pediatrician’s office…

    • From Russia with Love

      If his anchor nickname isn’t Cornholio, it should be.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Recipient of the Jerry Sandusky Award for Journalism and Community Service.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      I would have thought he’d have dibs on a spot in the Trump Administration…

  • Left Coast Tom

    Trump has four new hotels set to open in Mississippi
    and while they won’t carry his name, they’ll be founded on sketchy
    business ties and full of gaudy crap they’re calling “flea-market chic.”

    […reads article…]

    The Chawlas will partner with Trump Hotels on two properties in Cleveland and two in nearby Greenville and Clarksdale.

    […checks map…]

    Apparently the business model for L’il Donnie’s “American IDEA” is to build hotels in places people don’t visit.

    • Panika MCD

      that’s the best way to launder money through them. just look at the WINNING they do at the Azerbaijan tower.

    • From Russia with Love

      ART OF THE DEAL, MOTHERFUCKERS!

    • OddMan

      Hey Clarkdale is known as The Golden Buckle on the Cotton Belt.
      But really, these towns are 30 miles from each other, and have a total population between the three of them of about 65,000.
      EDIT: Cleveland, where they want to build two new hotels has a population of <13,000.
      Who the hell wants to go to a flea market chic hotel in the heart of the delta?

      • chicken thief

        “Who the hell wants to go to a flea market chic hotel in the heart of the delta?”

        Tony Joe White?

      • rosenbomb

        I’ve spent more than a few nights in Cleveland (it’s a long story). There’s a university there, but that’s about it. Too many mosquitoes for my taste.

        • OddMan

          I also see that there are casino’s really close to all these places.

          • rosenbomb

            Yup. Always near the river.

  • PubOption

    It seems that the alt-right hate (((internationalists))), gays and now Roma. I think I heard of something similar 70 or 80 years ago.

    • Jennifer R

      I keep saying, us trans are in danger due to already being on a government list.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      The alt-right just haven’t got an original idea in their petty little heads. Bless their hearts.

      • From Russia with Love

        “Hey, there are other groups that we’ve never heard of that we could hate!”

    • SweetDeeKat

      Yes, but I’m fairly certain gays exist. Not so sure about masses of gypsies shitting in our streets.

  • Nounverb911
  • Bureaucrap

    How long until the NRA starts organizing and funding local paramilitary goon squads? Inquiring minds want to know.

    • grindstone

      Who says they haven’t started already?

  • Nounverb911
  • Randy Riddle

    “Trump has four new hotels set to open in Mississippi and while they won’t carry his name, they’ll be founded on sketchy business ties and full of gaudy crap they’re calling “flea-market chic.””

    Well, this is good news for black velvet Elvis and Jeebus painters!

    • Bozilingus

      The eyes will follow you around the room because they will be cameras. tRump must know what is going on in these rooms.

    • Kiri the Unicorn
    • nightmoth

      true story: I once worked in a seedy faux-Mexican bar and restaurant that sported a collection of black velvet paintings. We had a regular patron who used to sit quietly at the bar. One day he had been staring at a velvet “dancing senorita” and he pushed his cap back and said as reverentially as any NYT critic, “I do believe that is the finest example of velvet art I have ever seen.”

  • La forza del resistino

    ‘Let O’Care die. I don’t own it, it’s dead to me’ says Donnie ‘Two Scoops’ Trump in his best Corleone voice.

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Chris Christie booed after catching foul ball at Mets game.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Dear God, please tell me he wasn’t dressed in a baseball uniform.

      • From Russia with Love

        The camel toe that ate the Citi.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      Do they actually need a reason for booing Christie? By now it should be automatic, like breathing.

    • bupkus231

      I bet he kept the ball, too.

  • Dominic, when speaking of good doggos, it is appropriate to censor your filthy language! It should be h*ckin’ good! I understand that Wonkette is, by and large, a wretched hive of scum and villainy, but these are doggos, you’re talking about!

    • natoslug

      A good dog would’ve chased that damned deer off, like Dog intended! Damned blueberry munching, pea vine devastating, fruit tree raping oversized rat . . .

      • From Russia with Love

        They even managed to fuck up our cyprus trees when they were young, rubbing the velvet off of their antlers courtesy of our trees that were “just the right height.”

  • Komsumverweigerer Ron

    That Rohrabacher story… Viktor Grin? Jack Matlock? Is it a story of corruption and scandal, or a concatenation of bad TV story ideas?

    • Mpeg

      upfisted for “concatenation”~
      /wordgeek

  • SomeBigRedDog

    Lion puppies!

    • MynameisBlarney

      Doge kittehs!

      • kareemachan

        We watched a show on PBS last night filmed partially in Madagascar, and one of the lemur species look JUST like a hybrid cougar cub/lemur would.

        May Alex was right about hybrids…

        Dang, I can’t find a photo of one and I was so overwhelmed with lemur cuteness (and overall astonished looks from all of them) that I didn’t catch the species’ name.

  • Nounverb911

    Give us this day pence’s daily commute:
    https://twitter.com/EamonJavers/status/887662842895269889

    • SomeBigRedDog

      Sure, when I roll into work with cops on my tail its frowned upon. These guys get away with everything.

    • MynameisBlarney

      Seems to be a bit much.
      I can understand the need for security, but just seems like he’s wanting to show off.

    • From Russia with Love

      Seriously. It’s not like he’s going to baseball practice or something.

    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      For someone so confident in God’s plan he sure takes a lot of precautions he might be wrong in the long run.

      • Opalescent Riddles

        He’s applying the “God helps those that help themselves” rule.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      All those cops, just to clear the area of any women that aren’t his wife. Couldn’t they just blindfold him?

      • Bozilingus

        Or have him neutered.

    • ltmcdies

      no wonder the unimaginative Trump could only see the trappings but not the work involved in being president. I still think that’s the only reason he ran…..heavy security for his every move and a nice march whenever he walks into a room

      • nightmoth

        I think he ran to up his brand name and had no idea he’d win.

    • grindstone

      Dang do I miss Biden.

    • Bobathonic

      You should see him going to the Capitol and back. Not as big a deal as for Dear Leader, but he goes back and forth a lot. Motorcycles swoop in to warn off cars, clear the right hand lane, then the motorcade cruises through. Two limos, a bunch of cops, a handful of Secret Service SUVs. For Dear Leader the motorcycles block off cross streets to entirely clear the road, and they warn off pedestrians from stepping off the curb. He also gets a tow truck, waaaaaahmbulance, and more cars in general.

      It’s been like that probably since the misbegotten reign of Bush the Stupider.

      • Les Appentis De la résistance

        I was within 10 feet of Obama as his entourage passed by us on my first ever visit to DC a few years ago. It was confusing and exciting for us hayseeds when the motorcyles showed up and closed traffic, etc. It was Veterans Day and he was coming back from Arlington.

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Where was Malaria during the dinner? Trump just up and left her?

    • laughingnome

      No comment.

    • PubOption

      She was accidentally splashed with tonic water, and had to leave.

    • Wild Cat

      Catching up with old johns . . . erm . . .clients . . . erm . . . college professors.

    • cmd resistor

      She was apparently sitting next to Putin per the assigned seating arrangement and I think Trump came over and snagged Putin and they went off to talk. Details kind of murky, though.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Re: Trump’s L.A. golf course. If I recall, when asked what he thinks about “God” by some fundie rag, Trump went into a long monologue about what a great deal he made on the land for the golf course and how much money it was going to make for him. God, apparently, took offense.

    • From Russia with Love

      Our God is a touchy God.

      • natoslug

        So’s Donald J. McPussgrab. Must be the godly bad-touch that the fundies love Trump for.

    • PubOption

      We always knew that Trump worshipped money.

    • Left Coast Tom

      Apparently, Los Angelenos took offense as well.

  • From Russia with Love

    “Trump says he’s willing to let insurance markets collapse to teach Democrats a lesson.”

    AMIGA

    Ahhh
    Make
    Insurers
    Grovel
    Again

  • Nounverb911
  • Robbertjan Brandenburg
  • MynameisBlarney

    Oh for fucks sake.
    PLEASE tell me this a fucking joke! PLEEEEEASE!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ga0KFkCB20

    • Kiri the Unicorn

      The BEST people. Quality people. Trumpy draws them to himself. Like flies.

  • Kiri the Unicorn

    “A family friend especially close to Trump Jr. and Eric Trump told People the loyalty within their family is ‘insane.’

    ‘They would never speak against their dad,’ the family friend said.

    The source in the brothers’ circle added: ‘You can’t bite the hand that feeds you, but he [Don Jr.] can’t wait for these four years to be over.’”

    I imagine that under the surface, the Trump family dynamic is a rat’s nest of seething resentment, repressed anger, and thwarted ambition. Everything is about serving ManBabyDad and satisfying his vast emotional and psychological needs, at the expense of having personal lives and identities. Get out while you can, Barron!

    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      Imagine being a fly on those wallls during thanksgiving dinners.

      • MynameisBlarney

        Catered by KFC.

      • I seriously cannot imagine Dampnut actually eating with his family ever.

        • MynameisBlarney

          I can’t imagine his family NOT coming up with excuses for why they have to be somewhere else if he asks.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          There was a tidbit on that early in the campaign, on how meals in Trump Palace last 45 minutes. Why? “That’s how long it takes Donald to eat.”.

          • SomeBigRedDog

            Have you ever tried eating KFC with a knife and fork? ITS NOT AS EASY AS IT LOOKS!

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Don’t get me started on those Taco Bowls…

        • Robbertjan Brandenburg

          Yeah plus giving thanks really isn’t something the family is known for.

          • Bobathonic

            “Form a line and each of you can thank me.”

      • SDGeoff3

        You’d have to be alert enough to avoid the food hitting the walls.

      • bupkus231

        Imagine being a fly ON those thanksgiving dinners…

    • MynameisBlarney

      I’m pretty sure Melania is going to try to shield that kid from his fathers insanity as much as possible.

      • kareemachan

        I think it’s too late, sadly enough.

        I also think that when Mommy and Daddy have to fly off to wherever and the hired help takes care of him, he’s good with it.

      • Bobathonic

        I don’t see that Melania has such great judgment.

        • MynameisBlarney

          True.

    • Jennifer R

      They should really have thought harder about having him declared unfit.

      • Kiri the Unicorn

        Everybody’s waiting for the big payoff, though. ManBabyDad is not gonna live forever, and they need to stay in his good graces.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          Except for Tiffany. When daddy dearest kicks, all she’s gonna get is a set of old golf clubs and one of those framed fake Time magazine covers.

          • YoBunnyBunny

            And probably some made-in-China cubic zirconia cuff links.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            And a couple of Trump neckties, obvs. Maybe a steak.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      When “family time” consists of ironing out the details on how to steal from a children’s cancer charity…ummm….yeah.

    • BigCSouthside

      I get the feeling there is some serious fucked up psychological abuse in that clan

    • cmd resistor

      No one ever really seems to say much about his sister the judge. Are they on good terms?

  • Nounverb911
    • Ghenghis McCann

      So, no change there.

    • Suttree

      He would have to get them back from Putin first.

    • SweetDeeKat

      This is a ‘shop, right? Right?

      • Opalescent Riddles

        Look for the very faint watermark at the right border of the image.

        • SweetDeeKat

          Poe’s law strikes again.

  • Mpeg

    Gracie the ‘Bark Ranger’

    Shouldn’t Glacier Nat’l Park’s mascot be called “Glacie”? Just sayin’~

  • Nounverb911
    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Bonus points for “strategery”.

  • Lyly Sirivong

    First a wedding planner, now a casino consultant. And… oh !

    When Jonathan Galaviz left his job at a casino consulting firm to go work for the Trump State Department, he didn’t have any concerns about job security. The firm—which consults for at least two Russian state entities, according to its website —proudly announced that Galaviz would be back after his stint at State. Galaviz himself consulted for a Russian government corporation on casino gambling.

  • ‘DEEP THOUGHTS’ BY MITCH McCONNELL

    “It’s better to be remembered as a loser than a quitter. Just as long as you destroy the lives of millions of Americans for generations to come in the process, it’s fine.
    LIFE IS GOOD”

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5cfa61d957de62313be338f0fafb0ad3986714ebaa0b36a177f16b3415b2cff8.jpg

    • chicken thief

      “I did steal that one SCOTUS seat, nevah fergit!”

      ~ Also too, The Turtle

  • chicken thief

    I’m with you, Gov Bentley. You lead a good clean life but all people remember is that you boned some gal or maybe stabbed your ex and her boyfriend.

    ~ OJ

  • MynameisBlarney
    • Kiri the Unicorn

      Can we get a Great Dane to piss on him?

      • chortlingdingo

        That’s not very kind to the Great Dane.

        • Ghenghis McCann

          “I wouldn’t piss on him if he was on fire.” G. Dane.

          • TundraGrifter

            “But if he’d bend over…”

            ~ The Pretty Good Dane

    • Zyxomma

      Shared.

  • Nounverb911
    • grindstone

      Hypocritical much? I haven’t forgotten the last eight years, Hucko.

    • La forza del resistino

      Merrick Garland wants some of what you’re smoking Huck.

    • Wild Cat

      Fuck you, you fat fascist Jesus-hating fuck.

    • ltmcdies

      starting with who Mike…the GOP three female senators? And why now….it’s not like cooperating with a president was in vogue 2009 til jan 2017

    • TundraGrifter

      “Gov. Mike Huckabee?” Is that how that idiot styles himself?

      “Right Wing Shill, Media Gasbag & Failed Presidential Candidate Mike Huckabee” would be more honest.

    • PubOption

      It seems that he’s admitting that all the current Congress is doing is filling the swamp.

    • Bub, Zombie in mourning

      Hucksterbee is one of the most odious of the high profile Trump supporters. His cynicism, disgusting hypocrisy and mendacity are clothed in a folksy, aw shucks demeanour – he tries to act avuncular – but if he was my uncle there is no way I’d let the oily bastard go to my kid’s room by himself to “say goodnight.”

      Christian, my ass.

    • Incoming Ham

      Awe shaddup. We all know you weren’t picked for the team. You are a little late to come brown nosing now.

    • SeeTrain65

      YOU. UTTER. SHITSTAIN.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

    Have any of you run into these new flavor of Chris Croker type trolls lately?

    https://i.imgflip.com/1sqmzf.jpg

  • Opiwan

    OMG, it can’t possibly be a bad day because LUTHER IS BACK!

  • Nockular cavity

    You know who else had a thing against gypsies…

    • TundraGrifter

      Toad – He swiped their canary colored cart.

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenResistance
  • TundraGrifter

    “Trump says he’s willing to let insurance markets collapse to teach Democrats a lesson. Personally, we’re not sure what that lesson is.”

    I’m going with “Don’t vote for Donald J. Trump for President of the United States.” That’s what I got out of it.

    • mardam422

      I learned that lesson 18 months ago. Perhaps if people needed the intervening time and idiocy they are at the least a little slow on the uptake?

    • Incoming Ham

      Teach Democrats a lesson and fuck over the people of America, many in red states who depend on it.

      Great move You Majesty! You show the peasants in the Duma who’s boss.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

    Flynn and The Trump’s boy Erdogan is being a nasty again:

    https://twitter.com/Roy_Gutman/status/887580839936233472

    • Zyxomma

      Oh, fuck.

  • spangled

    how long until Dennis Hastert gets a job in the trump administration? failing upward and all that.

    • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

      In charge of youth outreach?

      • YoBunnyBunny

        “Don’t let him show you the Reach Around!!!!”

      • TakingAmes

        EW EW EW

  • PubOption

    Good wishes to the Baltimore moms. I’m not sure that their tactics will be effective, but nothing else seems to have worked.

    • Courser_Resistance

      Never underestimate the power of moms to simultaneously disarm and strongarm at the same time. And this is particularly true of women of color.

    • It might.

      There are some mothers on the South Side in Chicago that had success in cleaning up their block by pleading and shamming gangs and dealers, however most of these kids (average age range is around 14-25 y.o.) simply move to another block and continue.

  • La forza del resistino
  • ziggywiggy

    After reading the Daily Beast story on Rohrabacher it seems obvious that the Russians are doing a really good job at getting people into our government that are basically propagandists for them. What a bunch of traitors.

    • cmd resistor

      YEah, pretty creepy.

  • mardam422

    “A BYU professor was ALLEGEDLY “You’re Fired” for her refusal to delete a post about how she thinks God is cool with gay and trans people….”
    What the hell good is it to have a God if I can’t use him to hate someone I don’t approve of?

  • paxpax

    A British advertising regulator has issued new rules to ban ads with gender stereotypes, that objectify women, or that promote unhealthy body images. First they ruin science fiction and robots, now they’re coming for our sexually explicit advertising…….
    Hopefully they’ll address the advertising gender stereotype that men have no idea how to cook or clean and they always need a woman to save them. Or they won’t.

    • John Thorstensen

      Honey! Bathroom bowl sure needs cleaning!

  • YoBunnyBunny

    The Washington Post reached out to four officials at the Trump
    Organization with questions about the California course. Just one responded.

    “David — please stop reaching out to me. Thank you,” Eric Trump, the president’s son, wrote in an email message.

    Bless his lil’ heart!!! I hope when David got that email he was like…
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/a6195f33a7036dd4eee92e95dbf2067803e7a4108061c0a2c9a763d6b383f88c.gif

    Funny as fuck…

    • TundraGrifter

      “But…if you’d reach around…”

  • SweetDeeKat

    Babby lions! Just what I needed. Thank you!

  • Bub, Zombie in mourning

    Perused the Cillizza Reddit for a few minutes this morning. It was rather amusing to see people roasting him so thoroughly, and his feeble responses. He really doesn’t get it at all. How does an idiot like him have a job covering national politics? He would be out of his depth on the staff of the “Greater Podunk Weekly News” writing reports on bake sales, and covering the classified desk one shift a week. Donald Trump’s assessment of Cillizza is still the only thing Donnie has ever said that I agree with: “Chris Cillizza is one of the dumbest and least respected of the political pundits.”

    When even DONALD TRUMP can see through your bullshit…

    • SDGeoff3

      Why should he care? He’s making less than $10 million a year.

  • Incoming Ham

    I’m pretty sure McConnell’s Halloween costume this year will be Don Quixote.

    • bupkus231

      More like the back half of Rosinante…

  • FAMOUS PRESIDENTIAL QUOTES FROM FAMOUS PRESIDENTS

    “I cannot tell a lie!!!” – George Washington

    “Four score and seven years ago!!!” – Abraham Lincoln

    “The only thing to fear is fear itself!!!” – Franklin D Roosevelt

    “The buck stops here!!!” – Harry S Truman

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ec10e1d4d0b47718e184053bd0eb5fef8eb27f93b87f702951b25905e779b4df.jpg

    The Donald J Trump Administration, also their watchcry

  • Carpe Vagenda

    Oh, bless you, Dominic. That Cillizza article made my day.

  • I would like to live in the alternate universe where I could give birth to lions out of my vagina. I would also like to be known as the Mother of Lions.

  • Les Appentis De la résistance

    “we’re not sure what that lesson is”

    Don’t nominate another Clinton?

  • Bitter Scribe

    I’m sorry but I have limited sympathy for people like that BYU instructor. If you take a job working for shitheads, don’t be surprised when they act like shitheads.

  • Zyxomma

    Great cinematography by Oregon Zoo. The Guardian has an article on the administration’s dismantling of our country: https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/jul/19/six-ways-trump-is-dismantling-america-after-six-months-in-white-house?utm

  • calliecallie

    OMG, Tucker Carlson. You know who else had a problem with gypsies?

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Cher? Along with tramps and thieves?

      • Yr. Gma

        Cher was one of them.. She had trouble with the people of the town who came around every night and laid their money down.

    • LeighBowery’sLuxuryComedy

      Far be it from me to Well Actually anyone, but.

      The Roma people themselves generally have a problem with that word, which they consider derogatory. Not that I expect Tucker Carlson to recognize such niceties.

  • cheetojeebus

    This whole controversy about the magnet act has me confused, what the hell is it and how does it work?

  • andyshelt

    From the Politico article headed:
    “Trump stokes voter fraud fears as commission convenes”

    Trump said people he met on the campaign trail would regularly raise concerns with him about voter fraud, “in some cases having to do with very large numbers of people in certain states.”

    Hmmm………….so Donnie, would those “very large numbers of people” be any particular color, I wonder?

    Less a dog whistle and more a 150 decibel dog siren!

    http://www.politico.com/story/2017/07/19/trump-pence-voter-fraud-commission-240714

  • Yr. Gma

    Oh noes! The kittehs are eating Fiona!

  • ltmcdies

    from the US Weather service…hot enough for yah

    https://twitter.com/capitalweather/status/887734886366425090

  • SeeTrain65

    Trump says he’s willing to let insurance markets collapse to teach Democrats a lesson. Personally, we’re not sure what that lesson is.

    How to be a complete failure as a President?

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