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Happy Friday, Wonketariat! We’re just a little bit closer to happy hour, so here’s some of the things we may be talking about while waiting for cocktails! (Just kidding, “waiting.”)

The Russian mob lawyer lady brought a “former Soviet counter intelligence officer” (THAT MEANS SPY) to her meeting with Trump Jr, Prince Kushner and Paul Manafort, but NBC isn’t publicly naming him (probably because he’d be disappeared by Putin).

A group of Democrats have filed suit against the 2016 Trump campaign and Republican ratfucker Roger Stone for plotting to steal private documents and personal information. If a judge gives the go-ahead, just IMAGINE the discovery. [Morning Maddow!]

White House aides may be exposed to Trump-Russia after Trump & Co. brought them to strategize about how to respond to Trump-Russia THREE WEEKS AGO. Remember guys, snitches won’t get stitches in a federal penal colony.

The DHS is denying Trump’s idiotic claim that former AG Loretta Lynch gave the Russian mob lawyer lady a visa seeing as how her visa would have been handled by the Russian consulate and the State Department. Because that’s how visas work.

The stupid bastard who ran around the dark and dangerous alleyways of the Internet screaming for hackers to help him find Hillary’s murder mail, Peter Smith, apparently committed suicide, so don’t be surprised if “alt-right” crazies to turn this into another conspiracy involving Killinton ninja assassins.

ICYMI: The Senate released its healthcare bill and it’s a big steaming shit pile.

Senate Republicans can’t afford to lose another vote on TrumpCare/McConnellCare now that Susan Collins and Rand Paul have passed. Make sure you’re staying in touch with your Senators, even if they’re Democrats, and giving them a piece of your mind!

Trump is putting pressure on Senate Republicans and tweeting some stupid bullshit instead of behaving like a rational person.

Trump didn’t push Putin because he was afraid of getting “into a fist fight.” I have to be honest, I’m pretty sure Putin would have split his wig.

The CBO projects Trump’s budget will grow the economy by ONLY 1.9 percent, and that Trump’s cuts to the social safety net would actually INCREASE the defect by $720 billion Ameros.

A federal judge has stopped the Muslim ban travel restrictions on Muslim majority countries (again), allowing extended nuclear families to glow a little brighter.

The House is set to vote on a GOP proposal to identify “Islamic religious doctrines, concepts or schools of thought,” that way we can pick all the secret spooky brown people out of a crowd and charge them with terrorism, just like the founding fathers always wanted.

Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke is spinning in circles about what to do with national monuments that have no oil or uranium, saying two national monuments in Idaho and Washington are no long being considered for “You’re Fired” status.

Trump’s White House released a transcript of an off the record meeting and it’s just full of gems like an invisible Tortilla Curtain, and Chinese hacking, and North Korean hacking. It is NOT full of some stuff he told reporters, which then didn’t get onto the transcript, for reasons.

The co-founder of Fusion GPS will not testify before Congress next week. Unfortunately, this means we won’t learn anymore about THE DOSSIER.

Nerds at NASA can’t math their way to Mars because there isn’t enough money, so they’re going (back) to the moon instead…maybe.

Mike Pence has hired David Ayers as a political consultant to help mitigate the damage of his involvement in Trump-Russia. You think he’s trying to hide something?

Kid Rock’s Senate run is a bunch of PR bullshit and just another excuse for this miserable failure to remake his image for the umpteenth time. Or maybe it’s to try and gloss over the DildoGate feud with the Insane Clown Posse. Whichever, we are definitely not writing about Kid Rock today, you’re welcome.

The DOJ is indicting two former House staffers for sharing “private, nude images and videos” of a House member and their spouse. Seriously, revenge porn isn’t funny, it’s stalking.

DEAD Breitbart suddenly has a hard-on for Milo Yiannopo-whatever now that he has a new book out. Hey, remember how Milo, the favorite gay sexist, racist, anti-semite of the “alt-right,” thought it was cool to fuck little kids? I know I do.

Babies are being born addicted to opioids; now doctors are struggling to help patients and their infants. You can thank the pharmaceutical industry.

A Chicago police sergeant accused of beating a handcuffed woman operated at least two racist websites according to A FUCKING GOOGLE SEARCH, as well as having three sustained complaints, one of which includes beating the living shit out of a minor.

Trump held a “lengthy” presser with French President Macron and he only managed to embarrass himself half a dozen times.

WaPo has a longform piece about Princess Ivanka’s stupid crap. And nobody is saying whether or not they use child or slave labor to make her Not American junk, but her company sure as hell has a lot of secrets.

And here’s your late night wrap-up! Stephen Colbert finds that Trump’s America measures morality a little differently; The Daily Show sat down with Trump’s Not American translators; Conan O’Brien spilled the beans on a made-for-TV movie version of Trump-Russia; Jimmy Kimmel had some thoughts on Trump’s invisible border wall.

And here’s your morning Nice Time! Asian Small-Clawed Otter Pups!

Freedom isn’t free, but ‘Yr Wonkette is! Throw us some Ameros so things stay that way!

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  • Joe Beese

    Storm clouds have been gathering above the lightly-tousled head of Jared Kushner, President Donald Trump’s son-in-law and trusted White House adviser, since April. But they split wide open this week amid damaging revelations about Kushner’s participation in a meeting with a Kremlin-linked lawyer promising incriminating information about Hillary Clinton, in addition to a fresh report about investigators’ interest in the data operation he was responsible for during the campaign.

    Already a “person of interest” in the special counsel’s probe on multiple fronts, federal investigators are now looking into Kushner’s attendance at a June 2016 Trump Tower meeting with the lawyer, Natalia Veselnitskaya, who was one of more than 100 foreign contacts disclosed in three separate revisions to his security clearance forms. They’re also probing whether the Trump campaign’s digital operation, which Kushner oversaw, coordinated with Russia to guide fake news stories to key districts in swing states.

    Democratic lawmakers and political observers on both sides of the aisle are questioning how Kushner can maintain the security clearance he needs to work on his overstuffed portfolio, or if he can even stay in the West Wing at all, given those reports. On top of that, White House aides and Kushner’s legal team have been spilling in the press their concerns that Kushner’s continued presence is endangering the President.

    http://talkingpointsmemo.com/dc/pressure-ramps-up-on-kushner-russian-meeting-federal-probe

    • therblig

      “Tousled”, a word which here means “having dotted lines for the executioner’s axe drawn below” – Lemony Snicket

  • Nounverb911
  • armed_bears
  • Nounverb911
  • Nounverb911
    • Joe Beese

      Speaking of morning devotionals, when’s the last service “Two Corinthians” attended?

      I thought he was big on the Bible and shit.

    • Gayer Than Thou

      President Carter: you’re 93. No one will blame you if you take it easy from here on out.

      • AJ Milne

        I figure that plans to die with his leather carpentry apron on.

  • Nounverb911
    • La forza del resistino

      WTF? The Bushes are larger than Michelangelo’s David. Must be a Texas thing

      • That’s because David was supposed to be on top of a building. He’d look normal sized with the correct perspective

        • La forza del resistino

          Heard that. In all modesty, the Bushes are wearing pants.

          • Celtic_Gnome

            Of course they’re wearing pants. Neither of them is sharp enough to not comment on Wonkette.

        • mardam422

          Not all of him would look normal sized, if you know what I mean.

    • Wild Cat

      “Dad, again, only without the lube.”

  • Yeah, we know, Disqus is fucking up today. It’s their fault, not ours, and we’ve already yelled at them.

    • Yay to early morning yelling! Glad i’m not the only one!

    • Joe Beese

      My favorite is when you’re typing a comment into a mobile browser, hit Backspace, and then it’s immediately “Fuck you, I’m not accepting any more edits. You should have typed it right the first time.”

      • Yes. Because typing on a touchscreen always goes covfefe

      • Courser_Resistance

        Hell, I’ve had that happen with the normal web version.

        Fuck you! You shall NOT post that comment.

        Which… honestly, about half the time I figure it really wasn’t worth the trouble anyway and do something else instead. Trying to recreate my absolutely brilliant observation never works.

  • Nounverb911
    • You know Brigite is thinking “you better scrub down with biohazard level sanitizer before coming near me again”

    • Oblios_Cap

      Probably trying to keep Trump away from his wife.

    • Shawn Renee Ernoehazy

      That was gross and weird; it seems Melania was off to the side until Brigitte grabbed her. Did Melania miss the “girl code” training in model school; don’t leave a sister alone with a creepy man? Ugh, never mind, she married one. She seems totally unaware of how creepy her “husband” is. I would totally love to hear the talks Emmanuel and Brigitte will have about all of this tonight.

  • La forza del resistino

    So Donald’s story re his knowledge of the timeline of Jr’s meeting changes?
    In Donald’s challenged vocabulary, ‘dissemble’ means what you do to your IKEA furniture before the moving van arrives.

  • OddMan

    In case you want to discuss the health care bill with your Senator or their staff.
    Find your Senator at:
    https://www.senate.gov/senators/contact/
    Also call the individual health staff for your Senator:
    http://congressional-staff.insidegov.com/d/a/Senate

  • Mpeg

    For someone who natters about putting a wall between unwanted advances from Messicans and banning entry for furrin Mooslims, Donnie sure has a penchant for overstepping invisible borders and invading others’ personal space~

  • Nounverb911
    • Yeah, I saw that too, but I chose the other thing.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      C’mon. Be gentile on the kid.

    • MynameisBlarney

      Wah hoppen?

      Can’t see the linky thingy.

  • Snark Tank Full of Resistance
    • Claire

      Not even joking, I actually do feel sorry for the Russian operatives. That’s just me being a bleeding-heart liberal, I guess.

  • Bill D. Burger

    Clueless in Pais.

    https://twitter.com/AynRandPaulRyan/status/885518397668155396

    Trump: “Did you know they got a Paris in Texas too? Great place. And you’re copy of the Eiffel Tower is bigger than the real one in Las Vegas…..bigly tower. I like it.”

  • Carpe Vagenda

    Breitbart is subsidized by Rebekah Mercer. Milo is subsidized by Rebekah Mercer. It seems as if there may be relevant math there.

    The CBO projects Trump’s budget will grow the economy by ONLY 1.9 percent, and that Trump’s cuts to the social safety net would actually INCREASE the defect by $720 billion Ameros.

    Hee. You said defect.

    • shit, I did, fixing

      • snigsy

        Don’t! “Defect” is appropriate.

        • OK, re-re-fixed

        • Carpe Vagenda

          Yeah, I like it better :)

    • Mike

      Nice defection

  • Joe Beese
    • Joe Beese

      Does he have a hairsprayed comb-forward, wear long neckties, and tweet a lot?

      • Celtic_Gnome

        No, but his English has a strong eastern European accent.

    • Longstreet63

      They just remembered, obviously. Eventually it will come out that it was held in a meeting hall with the whole Trump campaign and the staff of the Russian Embassy and a donkey.*

      *Also a conjuror and a steel band, as the saying goes.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Seven virgins and a mule

        • amrak63

          Even they couldn’t keep it cool.

        • amrak63

          “Karn Evil 9” is a song Kid Rock could never perform, because it requires actual musical talent and skill.

    • ariel_gee_398

      He’s just being transparent (in his efforts to hide evidence of collusion).

    • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

      I haz a confuse. Don Jr. is 1.
      The Russian chick was 2.
      J-Kush was 3.
      Manafort was 4.
      The KGB agent was 5.

      And there was a “third” person?

      Which 2 of the above 5 aren’t people?

      • Antonin Dvorak

        Trump team originally reported to have met with Natalia and Rob Goldstone (that British music promoter, who set the whole thing up). This new guy would be the third “guest” if you will.

        • cmd resistor

          As best I can tell, Goldstone may have come in and introduced the imaginary Russians and then left.

      • Ghenghis McCann

        Donnie the Kid and his brother in law?

    • PubOption
  • Nounverb911
    • snigsy

      Don Jr is dead?

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Nounverb911
    • therblig

      “Charisma – is that Canadian for shower?” – DJT

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Kid Rock,
    Shall I compare thee
    To a glass dildo?

    • Ricky Gay

      He’s no Vanilla Ice.

    • amrak63

      He’s the douchebag version of Pat Boone.

  • Bill D. Burger

    Fuckers can’t get their lies straight even after two days. Jeeeeez’

    https://twitter.com/AynRandPaulRyan/status/885622660083863553

    • Reximus

      I am fucking AMAZED at how bad they are at lying, after so many years of practice

      • Gayer Than Thou

        I thought we already knew that His Orangeness was upstairs at Trump Tower that day…? No?

      • Ricky Gay

        They can now just phone it in, in our post-fact world.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Right? Can’t they send out a fucking memo telling everyone what the lie of the day is? JFC.

        • Celtic_Gnome

          I worked for a state agency that processed business registrations. After the change of administrations, processing times went from 3-5 days to 12-16 weeks. The administration told the phone operators on the customer service lines every day how long they should tell people calling in the processing time was. We referred to it as the lie of the day.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            See, Trumpians? There’s already an established protocol for this!

    • elviouslyqueer

      Lying sack of shit is lying. Day ending in -y.

    • Joe Beese

      I’m not sure if I trust Corey Lewandowski.

    • ariel_gee_398

      He had a fucking fundraising meeting in NYC that day. Reince was in NY. Chris Christie was there. Cameras were there. Jesus christ that is one dumb fuck.

  • Joe Beese
  • mardam422

    Macron shouldn’t only be concerned with where Trump’s hand is going. He should worry about where it’s been.

  • elviouslyqueer

    Trump didn’t push Putin because he was afraid of getting “into a fist fight.” I have to be honest, I’m pretty sure Putin would have split his wig.

    Oh please, Dominic. Putin wouldn’t have just split his wig. He would’ve ripped the fucker clean off and set fire to it while simultaneously forcing Pussgrab on all fours and demanding he tongue-shine his shoes.

    • BigCSouthside

      Putin is pretty fucking good at Judo. He would have folded the fat man in half

      • amrak63

        I used to entertain a “Rommel, you magnificent bastard” sort of admiration for Putin, tempered by the knowledge that he was an authoritarian.

        Nowadays, I consider him The Enemy, period.

  • Oblios_Cap

    The House is set to vote on a GOP proposal to identify “Islamic religious doctrines, concepts or schools of thought,”

    Well, that certainly sounds unconstitutional.

    • Longstreet63

      I’m shocked, SHOCKED to find that religious prejudice is going on here…

      • amrak63

        “Your votes from bigots, Mr. Republican.”

        “Oh, thank you, very much. Everyone is to leave at once!”

    • therblig

      they just want to “identify” them. seems harmless enough.

      • PubOption

        Then they can be mandated to wear green crescents on their clothes.

  • Gayer Than Thou

    I probably wouldn’t actually enjoy a fist fight between Twitler and Putin, and it probably would be a truly terrible, possibly WWIII inducing event. But I fully believe Trumpy thinks that if it came to blows with Putin, he’d be the one to throw the first punch and he’d be able to hold his own.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Cops will be joining together all across the country over their right to run racist websites. It’s such a thankless job…if only the public would support them more.

    • therblig

      #blueliesmatter

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Ωbjectifier

    “Or maybe it’s to try and gloss over the DildoGate feud with the Insane Clown Posse.”

    Dildos. How the fuck do they work?

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    It’s beginning to look like I was the only person who wasn’t invited to the meeting with Dimwit Jr. and the Russians. You bastards…turning off the lights and being real quiet so I wouldn’t know you were in there!

    • William
    • Oblios_Cap

      The other guy was Putin!

    • Gayer Than Thou

      I’m sorry to tell you we had lots of those cakes we like.

      • TJ Barke

        And cedar cheese.

        • Longstreet63

          It’s smoky, but a bit harder than I like. Difficult to spread on crackers without power tools.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            But you don’t have to worry about moths eating your woolens!

        • Persistent Tennessee Rain

          I’ve said this before, but it bears repeating. Thanks to you people, I once asked an Amish farmer for a block of his “Cedar Cheese.” *shakes fist* damn you, people!

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Did he sigh and say “these fuckin’ English…”?

          • Persistent Tennessee Rain

            He probably wanted to. And even though I sufficiently embarrassed the snot out of myself for doing that, I still go back to him because it really is awesome cheese. But, when I’m walking up to his stand, I mutter under my breath, “It’s cheddar, the word is ‘cheddar,’ don’t fuck this up. Say it with me, TR -‘CHeddar’.”

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Slightly OT, but there is a Mennonite community in the Mexican state of Chihuahua; being mostly agrarian, they make cheese that gets exported to the U.S. In the small Mexican markets around town “queso Menonita” is very popular.

          • TJ Barke
        • From Russia with Love

          And canned clams.

  • La forza del resistino

    If two Nat’l Monuments are off the hook, canz we still open a couple Exxon-Mobil gas stations on the grounds?

    • Longstreet63

      Don’t be silly. That would spoil the view for the rich people they will be sold to.

  • Oblios_Cap

    The CBO projects Trump’s budget will grow the economy by ONLY 1.9 percent, and that Trump’s cuts to the social safety net would actually INCREASE the defect by $720 billion Ameros.

    Typical GOP math.

  • Bill D. Burger
  • MynameisBlarney

    He went on in the letter to ask the lawyers, “Did you study how to look like douchebags in college?”

    ~Kid Rock

    https://up-1.cdn-fullscreendirect.com/production/photos/2506/large/20131220_185948_2506_648118.jpeg

    Luckily for Kid Rock, looking like a douchebag came naturally.

    • MynameisBlarney

      I mean seriously, what in the actual fuck is he doing in that pic?

      • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

        Demonstrating his “technique” from when he was banging Pam Anderson?

      • Kung Fu, Midwestern Dumbass with Phoenix Eyes style

      • The Green Bastard

        Look out! He might be a kung-fu hillbilly! https://media.giphy.com/media/JwydkD2QgZCZa/giphy.gif

        • Shaolin Shotgun Shack!

        • MynameisBlarney

          It’s “Fishing with Ghandi” ultimate finishing move.

        • therblig

          Crouching Cracker, Hidden Kleagle

      • Oblios_Cap

        Being a dick?

      • From Russia with Love

        Getting ready for Pam Anderson’s tits?

  • Oblios_Cap

    Kid Rock’s Senate run is a bunch of PR bullshit

    Damn. I was ready to give his opponent the clips in Joe Dirt where he played Robby – as opposition research.

    • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

      OTOH, if he’s in the Senate, he won’t be singing….

  • Randy Riddle

    Speaking of Insane Clown Posse … people in my home town, a tiny little place in the mountains of NC that are All Trump, All the Time, are so excited because a local rap group has made good and will be performing at the Gathering of the Jugaloos.

    And my constantly mother asks me why I don’t want to move back home.

    http://www.jeffersonpost.com/news/8174/wiked-wood-set-to-perform-in-okc

    • In September, the Juggalo March on Washington is to take place. I’m not joking.

      • I know, I was going to go but I have tickets for Riot Fest instead.

        EDT: I wanted to go do a 2-3 min. video post, but it’s really not worth the cost of the flight/bus/train.

        • You’re gonna have to face the calliope music when the Dark Carnival comes for you!

      • Lance Thrustwell

        I’ve never seen an actual March of Idiots before.

        Okay, several racist or right-wing marches fit that description, sure, but the difference is that the Juggalos generally know they’re idiots.

        • Fucking Resistance, how does it work?

          • Ωbjectifier

            V = A x Ω.

        • MynameisBlarney

          One of my friends is a Juggalo, he’s been to several of the gatherings and told me last time I saw him that most Juggalos don’t even like ICP anymore.
          They like most of the other groups on the label.
          Which, from what I’ve heard, is just as shitty as ICP’s music.

      • Bobathonic

        Thankfully they’re doing it on a Saturday (no school?).

      • The Green Bastard

        The fuck are they marching for? Faygo & grease paint prices skyrocket?

    • We’re resisting our level best up here, Randy!

  • Courser_Resistance

    Love mom. ‘Time for swimming lessons! It’s the Deep End for you!’. Meanwhile baby boy isn’t sure he likes having his paws wet.

  • Liberte! Egalite! Covfefe!

  • Joe Beese
    • Lance Thrustwell

      Since it’s not in the Kremlin’s interest for dirt or contradictions to come out about Trump… and every Russian knows it’s not healthy to do anything that’s not in the Kremlin’s interests… why is Akhmetshin being forthcoming about this?

    • From Russia with Love

      But nothing came of it?

  • OddMan
    • William
      • From Russia with Love

        “And get that cross outcher pussy!”

        — Richard Pryor

      • Pinkham’s Law

        A real shame it was unsuccessful.

      • Courser_Resistance

        Frankly, that’s what it looked like to me the first time I saw it.

    • chortlingdingo

      TBH public praying makes me super uncomfortable.

      • MynameisBlarney

        Yeah, watching people talk to their imaginary friends as if they actually exist and have magic powers is always hard to watch.

        • Bobathonic

          Jesus was creeped out by it, too, and said to keep it hidden.

          • MynameisBlarney

            Allegedly.

      • arglebargle

        But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast
        shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father
        which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.

        Matthew 6:6

        Fuck you Pat Robertson (et al)

    • armed_bears

      Starring Hakeem Olajuwon as God.

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    I love Eric Levitz’s take on our buddy Gorka:
    “Gorka came into the White House as a terrorism analyst, one who would advise (one-time National Security Council member) Steve Bannon. But Gorka boasts no genuine expertise on Islamic extremism. He does, however, know a thing or two about how to use a posh accent to convince stupid people to believe lies. And the Trump administration will surely have plenty of use for that service for a while yet.”

    http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2017/07/trump-may-lift-russia-sanctions-to-give-cooperation-a-chance.html

    • BigCSouthside

      He is a total fraud. The average commenter on Wonkette has as much credentials to be an advisor on terrorism as Gorka

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Since when is a Hungarian accent considered “posh” in America?

      • Bobathonic

        I think it’s more like “exotic”.

      • Haven’t you ever seen “Green Acres”, dahlink?

        • From Russia with Love

          Yes. Is he Arnold?

      • Antonin Dvorak

        He is British-born to an Hungarian parent. So he has a legit posh English accent.

    • Persistent Tennessee Rain

      One would think that the absolute minimum requirement for someone to be an expert in middle eastern terrorism would be the ability to speak Arabic. Gorka does not.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        Maybe we should just give the job to Kushner, since he seems super smart.

  • Longstreet63

    It’s Bastille Day. There ought to be something French Revolution-y we could do to commemorate that.

    • It’s been discussed, but TBH it’s not at the top of the list right now.

      • Persistent Tennessee Rain

        IOW, you don’t really care.

      • Me not sure

        So there’s a top secret list that we’re not allowed to see, is there? A kind of superwonkagenda.

      • Longstreet63

        Aristo!

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Eat cake?

    • therblig

      we could jailbreak our iPhones

    • Me not sure

      Storm the IRS and free the tax return’s?

    • snigsy

      In my wine shop I’ll be knitting my wish list of certain people’s names. (With votes, of course.)

    • William
      • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

        TBH, you could say the same for about half of the UN Member States.

      • BeachBum

        ” A lot of people don’t know that.”

    • Got any tumbrels lying around?

      • Longstreet63

        I did not say that out loud.

    • Kiri the Unicorn
      • Ωbjectifier

        She’s hot.

      • Longstreet63

        I dunno if she’s Liberty or Equality, but I bet she’s not Fraternity.

        • BeachBum

          She looks very free. But equal too. Tough call.

      • Moldy Weißwurst

        Keep tRump away from that painting least Liberty wind up with orange fingerprints all over her!

      • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

        She’s in good shape. Took good care of herself.

        • Longstreet63

          Always, but she did have a pretty destructive relationship with Germany to work out.

      • BeachBum

        Vive la France !

  • Am I the only one who had to google ICYMI and felt old after?

    My first assumption was that it was very existential Prince-speak: I see. Why am I?

  • bookish

    http://nbcnews.to/2tQgOj5

    WASHINGTON — The Russian lawyer who met with the Trump team after a promise of compromising material on Hillary Clinton was accompanied by a Russian-American lobbyist — a former Soviet counter intelligence officer who is suspected by some U.S. officials of having ongoing ties to Russian intelligence, NBC News has learned.

    NBC News is not naming the lobbyist, who denies any current ties to Russian spy agencies. He accompanied the lawyer, Natalia Veselnitskaya, to the June 2016 meeting at Trump Tower attended by Donald Trump Jr., Jared Kushner and Paul Manafort.

    • TJ Barke

      Oh yeah, sure, of course he has no current ties…

  • chortlingdingo

    Not sure if all y’all saw this, but I thought it worth sharing.

    https://youtu.be/64mWOoj68qo?t=3m42s

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      Can’t see this too often!

  • ariel_gee_398

    Uh oh – I think this is getting to be too much for the poor Republican party team.
    https://twitter.com/joshtpm/status/885860331406450689

    • William
    • alwayspunkindrublic

      “Insider briefs” maybe doesn’t mean what they think it does.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Trust the modern GOP to not even know enough to use standard filler-copy text (“Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit, sed diam nonummy nibh euismod tincidunt…”)

      • BeachBum

        Dos cervezas frios con limon, y tostitos con queso, y digame, baile la senorita ? Por favor !

    • That’s brief, alright.

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      Wheels coming off, axles snapping, transmission grinding gears…

      • Antonin Dvorak

        And when the time comes, the GOP’s only solution will be to change the driver.

      • Courser_Resistance

        Hell, the entire engine block is about to drop right out on the highway.

        • Celtic_Gnome

          I once saw a guy in a muscle car rev the thing up so high at a red light that the differential came off.

          • Courser_Resistance

            I hope everyone laughed at him and pointed.

            Ah yes, my youth of dysfunctional vehicles.

            We had a Mercury Marquis station wagon with a HUGE engine. One of the engine mounts came loose and when you revved the engine, it look like was going to crawl right out of the engine compartment!

      • Jeffery Campbell

        I have always enjoyed a demolition derby.

  • Daniel Hooper

    Oh God; I hope someone has explained to Trump that a, “nuclear family” has nothing to do with radiation…

  • bookish

    http://nbcnews.to/2uZvXgM

    The Senate Republican health-care bill isn’t dead. But it’s close
    The bad news for Senate Republicans on health care: They can’t lose a single additional vote out of about half a dozen who are undecided or who have clear reservations about the revised legislation. The good news for them: That single additional vote that could kill the bill still hasn’t materialized. NBC’s Leigh Ann Caldwell: “Two senators on opposite ends of the Republican ideological spectrum — Susan Collins, R-Maine, and Rand Paul, R-Ky. — have already said they are opposed to the bill and will vote against a motion to proceed, the necessary vote for the measure to be brought before the Senate. If Republicans lose any more votes, the bill will languish for a second time. Even Sen. Mike Lee, R-Utah, who worked with Cruz on the beginning stages of his measure, said through his spokesman Conn Carroll that he’s undecided on the new bill.” As HuffPost’s Matt Fuller writes, “The Senate health care bill isn’t dead, but it has started giving away its belongings to the grandchildren.”

    Against the bill (and will vote against a motion to proceed)
    Susan Collins, R-Maine
    Rand Paul, R-Ky.

    Undecided/has reservations
    Shelley Moore Capito, R-W.V.
    Dean Heller, R-Nev.
    John Hoeven, R-N.D.
    Mike Lee, R-Utah
    Lisa Murkowski, R-Alaska
    Rob Portman, R-Ohio

    • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

      As I said yesterday, the rumblings on the ground from the politcos here is that as long as Governor Sandoval is against the bill, Senator Heller will be against it too. Heller stuck his neck out way too far to reverse now on his own – he does and Jacky Rosen has a treasure trove of clips about how much he lurves Medicaid and wouldn’t ever take it away from Nevadans to use against him next year. And for all the threats of a primary, the state GOP doesn’t have anyone viable to run against him since all the top choices are jockeying for the Governor’s race.

      • Steve Cole

        Agreed. Heller might claim “undecided” but the answer is “no”

    • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

      Here’s what I don’t understand: WHY ISN’T THAT LIST 5 TIMES LONGER????

      This is SUCH a piece of shit, you’d think NOBODY would want to support it.

      • Bub, the truculent Zombie

        Money talks

      • Me not sure

        Let me tell you about the Republican Party.

        • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

          Well, it was a rhetorical question. Along the lines of “What happened to these assholes’ souls?” and “Why don’t these supposed ‘Christians’ read the NEW Testament once in a while?”

          • Me not sure

            What are these Republican souls of which you speak?

          • bupkus231

            More like “Republican soles” – after they just stepped in dogshit.

      • chortlingdingo

        I’m sure some of the big donors have been applying pressure in the form of $$$.

      • BeachBum

        There $ are some $ people that $ are against $ the govt in $ healthcare for $ principles $.

    • BigCSouthside

      I bet it gets passed.

      • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

        Even if it does, then it has to go to conference. And there is no way in hell the dum dums in the House are gonna accept anything the Senate has cobbled together – especially since it doesn’t kill the taxes they want killed.

        • BigCSouthside

          I think they will just to kill the ACA

        • Ω cynmac will never surrender

          I predict that if it does pass, the healthcare market will death spiral faster with October starting open enrollment for 2018. The insurance companies will not want to offer policies that will cost them profits, if there is a chance that a better for them set of laws in coming sooner.

        • Supposedly the house is ready to pass whatever senate crap passes the same day.

    • BeachBum

      Its dead when the grandkids start calling “dibs.”

  • mardam422

    So NASA doesn’t have the money to put a man on Mars. Maybe the Moon? Let’s stop kidding ourselves. The way things are going with budgets at NASA, we’ll be lucky if they can put a Mars bar or a Moonpie in a man. .

    • TJ Barke

      Well, being able to bomb poor muslims is a higher priority…

      • :(

        • TJ Barke

          Tell me about it…

      • Komsumverweigerer Ron

        ‘We’d like you to increase our budget so we can build another half-dozen Saturn Vs.’
        ‘Why?’
        ‘Umm… to drop REALLY big bombs on… Iran?’
        ‘Would you prefer a full dozen?’

    • It’s worse than that. The SLS was pushed by Sen. Shelby who, rather than take five fucking minutes to read a pro/con brief, pushed to build some antiquated, single-use system over a reusable launch system (like the space shuttle, which was a pick-up truck for space) primarily because the company that would build SLS was in his state. NOBODY is using single-use systems, they’re simply not efficient. I’m a huge space nerd, and IMO (as a species) we need to become space faring in order to survive, however the only people in congress pushing for space travel/exploration coincidentally happen to be the dumbest and greediest sons of bitches on the planet. They’re the guys who like ‘splodey things that make you “OO” and “AAAHHH” instead of gathering together and thinking, “Wow, what a remarkable human achievement, let’s push it further!”

      • arglebargle

        We can always hitch a ride with the Rooskies, especially now that we’re fast becoming BFF’s.

        • TJ Barke

          Something tells me that Putie’s gonna be busy washing his hair a lot now…

      • mardam422

        What should be concerning is that “Maybe we can go to the Moon” thingy. Who wants to be the astronaut sent to the Moon and have NASA call and say “Well…we have a problem. Seems we’re out of gas money.”

      • MizzMazz

        I could totally get behind a manned Mars mission. I like the romance of it; even Sagan waxed on about how cheap it would be compared to how much we spent on weapons back in the Cosmos days. Now though, we realize that our rovers and probes do a better job of collecting data, without the extra baggage it would require to send humans over there. I don’t know if we can get the same spirit we had during the Moon landings now.

        Like you said, the enthusiasm isn’t coming from the same place.

    • natoslug

      Maybe they should skip the Earth to moon step, and try sending some Mooninites to Mars, and a few Martians to the moon.

      • mardam422

        Moon Maidens to Mars? Jethro Bodine would be so proud.

  • La forza del resistino

    Someone explained to Donald that Bastille Day marked the start of bringing down the aristocracy and made his way to AF1 post haste.

  • Msgr_MΩment
    • Antonin Dvorak
      • natoslug

        I think you still need to run the Louvain method on that mess, make it easier to focus on the communities.

        • I always forget that Sansa and Tyrion are married.

          What is the louvain method.

          • natoslug

            A heuristic algorithm for decomposing a graph into communities/maximize the modularity of a graph. Basically reducing to a small set of supernodes and super-arcs. And unless you only cared about a small number of GoT characters, a way to lose all of the interesting detail.

  • Marceline

    Seriously. Before my first cup of tea.

    https://twitter.com/kylegriffin1/status/885829560750755840

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      Not till the fool is thrown out of office and into some place without Internet access.

  • Longstreet63

    Be warned if you read that transcript.
    It’s a constant barrage of What-The-Fuck that starts with him suggesting that Bastille Day has something to do with WWI and includes a lecture on why the Tortilla Curtain needs to be transparent and solar powered.
    I just Don’t Even.

    • Martini Ambassador 🍸

      Yeah, that transparent wall thing is a head-scratcher. But don’t worry, he’s perfectly sane, folks.

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        Especially with 60 lb drug bags being thrown over the fence. Trebuchets anyone?

        • Celtic_Gnome

          Per Trevor Noah, he’s not concerned about all the guns in society or global warming. Trump’s biggest safety concern is people strolling along the American side of the wall getting hit by flying bags of drugs.

      • 🛶🗣️ Mr Canoehead 🛶🗣️

        The Emperor’s New Wall

    • cmd resistor

      Halfway through it (probably not even that far) I had to go back and make sure I wasn’t reading a snark satire thingy.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      I read it and then I had to read a book.

  • MAYBE SOMEWHAT RELEVANT – I DUNNO

    Everybody remembers SPY VS SPY.

    Not so much everybody remembers for a time it was SPY VS SPY VS SPY.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/aa3c925ef594e226fafde31386968788dcd9a59072c2b5c3a1750de05d23a0d9.jpg

  • bookish

    http://www.rollcall.com/news/opinion/health-care-mitch-mcconnell-republicans

    The updated Senate bill retains these sharp Medicaid reductions, which seems a strange way to woo wavering moderate senators such as Rob Portman and Shelley Moore Capito. But, according to news reports, McConnell has been whispering that this is all boob bait for the suckers since future Congresses would almost certainly roll back these meat-cleaver cuts.

    But the public assault on Medicaid would all but guarantee that health care would be a major issue in the 2020 presidential and congressional campaigns. And it is impossible to see how the Republicans would benefit from a political debate over nursing home coverage for Aunt Sally. Most Americans may not know the intricacies of health care law, but they do know that Medicaid is the last-resort safety net for the elderly who have exhausted their life savings.

    • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

      The only way it works as “boob bait” is if the boobs don’t know it. So congratulations, Senator, you just gave the game away.

      • BeachBum

        I don’t consider McConthem whispering in my ear any kind of “boob bait” I wanna hear.

    • BeachBum

      The party of family values.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Major issue in 2018 midterms also too. These asshats may be passing on town halls, but they do have to campaign for reelection.

  • rosenbomb

    I’ve been reading Man Without a Face: The Unlikely Rise of Vladimir Putin (thanks to whatever Wonker recently recommended it), and though there is a lot of misinformation about Putin’s early life, one thing his friends seem to agree on is his penchant for fist fights. He’s not a very large man, but he’s a scrapper.

    tl;dr: Putin would kick Trump’s ass in a fist fight

    • Bub, the truculent Zombie

      There’s a PPV I’d spring for. Somebody get Vince McMahon and Dana White on the horn. Lets make this happen!

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        With Bruce Buffer announcing and Herb Dean.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        I don’t know if I want to shell out $30-$40 for 3-5 seconds of action no matter how satisfying it would be.

    • Reximus

      hell, Melania would too

      • rosenbomb

        I wish she would

        EDIT: w/ votes

      • BeachBum

        I think I remember in some John Wayne movie, him saying that when a man is scratched up by a women, it says more about the man than the women.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      Donna Rose would kick Trump’s ass in a fist fight.

    • Me not sure

      Fist size matters.

    • PubOption

      There was a claim, I don’t think it was from that book, that Putin is distantly related to Rasputin.

  • WotsAllThisThen

    Snitches get polonium.

    I know it doesn’t rhyme. I’m working on it.

    • But it IS accurate

    • Wild Cat

      I upvoted you because that’s my favorite Terry Jones line.

    • Longstreet63

      Maybe it rhymes in some Slavic language…

  • MynameisBlarney
    • Beautiful Soup

      Catlusion.

    • PubOption

      Mere cats?

  • Mr. Blobfish

    “It’s called opposition research, or even ‘research into your opponent”.
    Poetry, really.

  • NotReallyHere

    From the WaPo article about Princess Ivanka’s Stupid Crap:

    The Institute for Global Labour and Human Rights, a nonprofit organization, estimated in 2013 that a denim shirt that cost $3.72 to make in Bangladesh would cost more than three times as much to make in the United States.

    It’s nice to see some numbers on this. So, if it costs 3 times as much to make the denim shirt, that would cost $11.16.

    I found this Ivanka denim shirt online. http://www.zappos.com/p/ivanka-trump-denim-front-tie-top-medium-blue/product/8936980/color/4008?ef_id=V3mJNgAABE-CtMJl%3A20170714141730%3As&ef_id=V3mJNgAABE-CtMJl%3A20170714141730%3As

    It’s ugly, and it costs $47.99. So, that means that a profit of $36.83 per shirt is not enough? The profit needs to be $47.22 or it’s not worth bothering? Clearly I don’t business.

    • rosenbomb

      From the sole review: If “zero” stars were an option, it would get “ZERO”.

      Fashion seems to be a tough business. American Apparel is now bankrupt, and one of their selling points was manufacturing in the US. I’m worried that’s a warning to other companies? I mainly just shop at thrift stores now, which can be ethical depending where you go.

      Robyn should write us a post about the clothes manufacturing business!

      • NotReallyHere

        I also like thrift stores. Honestly, I wouldn’t pay $7.99 for that shirt. I might take it if you gave it to me, and maybe I would wear it if I needed to do some painting.

        Yes, I agree that the clothing business is tough. I don’t know what the solution is, but it hate that the right answer appears to be sweat shops. I would love to read more about it!

        • John Thorstensen

          I am officially A Old, but because I have a just-past-teenager, I know that he awesomeness of thrift stores has been celebrated in song.

      • WotsAllThisThen

        I don’t mind buying clothes made in Vietnam because I feel like we owe them. But I have no clue about labor conditions there.

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        American Apparel also had some huge management problems. I shop at consignment stores, where many of the clothes still have tags on them.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      I think you’re ignoring the cost of the label saying Ivanka Trump, that probably adds at least $50 to the price.

      • NotReallyHere

        Oh, yes, I forgot to factor that in. What was I thinking??

    • JackLinks

      What’s with the buttons at the elbow on this overpriced/dyed bed-sheet of a shirt?

      • NotReallyHere

        I don’t know. Is it supposed to be shabby-chic? I don’t really fashion either.

      • BeachBum

        To keep your elbows off the table. And tie up sleeves when doing real “roll up sleeves” work. Like when Lil’ Paulie was a-splaining healthcare to us. Or fake washing pots and pans in a soup kitchen.

    • Ms.Moon

      Nobody is buying her crap though at least in my neck of the woods. The big Marshalls that is close to us has so much of her crap and it’s just sitting on the hangers my sister picked up a simple tank that was hers when she saw who was on the label it might as well had been a dead rat, it stayed in the store.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      True Story ~ last month when I was at the March for Truth in DC, I stopped to shop at the Saks outlet store and they had racks and racks of Ivanka’s ugly crap. Even at the discount price, it was overpriced. I hear some outlets, like Macy’s, are changing the labels.

      • NotReallyHere

        Maybe she needs to use sweat shops because her stuff is ugly, and constantly needs to be closed out? That must be it. Is that a business model?

        • Ω cynmac will never surrender

          As long as the main stores buy her stuff, she’ll make money. When she has to sell to the secondary market here, then it’s over here. Allegedly, her crap is still selling in Asia, not so much here and in Europe.

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    Hey, happy Bastille Day, also too. Remember the reason for the season.
    https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/4/4e/Prise_de_la_Bastille.jpg

    • TJ Barke

      Because the Marquis De Sade incited a riot?

    • John Thorstensen

      There’s a wonderful version of the French national anthem called “Less Mar Sallies”, in your best American accent:

      Less Enn Fants Dee La Batteries
      Le JOWER de GLORE est ARRIV – eee!

  • Nockular cavity

    Trump didn’t push Putin because he was afraid of getting “into a fist fight.” I have to be honest, I’m pretty sure Putin would have split his wig.

    What a fucking poseur Trump is. Putin is a black belt in judo, and is active as hell in promoting the sport (one of the only things I admire him for). I’m pretty sure Trump would get choked out faster than you can say “build the wall.”

    • Steve Cole

      Like a many so called “tough talking street fighters” I’m pretty sure a hard slap would end the whole show (for Trump).

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      what’s funny is, Gorka was on TV last night saying Trump pressed Putin hard on the issue. LOL!

      This is the money quote:
      “Gorka said “the last thing” one could say about Trump was that he was weak, and that Trump had pressed Russian President Vladimir Putin on the matter at a meeting last Friday.

      “The President of the Russian Federation denied,” Gorka said. “At that point, you have to move on.””

  • MynameisBlarney
  • Dutchman

    French Army Band plays Daft Punk medley for Trump and Macron.

    Awww, now they’re just fucking with him. LOL

    http://www.irishnews.com/magazine/daily/2017/07/14/news/the-french-army-band-performed-daft-punk-hits-to-macron-and-trump-on-bastille-day-and-it-s-a-banger-1084658/

    • Pilotshark

      like the way trumps hair got into it but he didn`t :-)

    • Manders

      That was amazing. Even the French military is more With It than our president.

  • bookish

    Cutest water doggy I ever saw. I am in love.

  • marxalot

    Who wants to play compare/contrast on how the NYT story frames babies born addicted to opiods with the coverage about “crack babies?” It isn’t a fun game!

  • Gary Charound

    David Ayers? Isn’t his name Nick Ayers?

  • Celtic_Gnome

    I called my “Senator”, Rob Portman, this morning to urge him not to support McConnellCare. Of course, I didn’t speak to a human. I didn’t even get to leave a voicemail. Twice, I was cut off after I gave my name and phone number because my message was too long.

    So, I called Governor John Kasich at 614.466.3555 and asked the actual human who answered to pass along my request for the Governor to contact the “Senator” and urge him not to support McConnellCare.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Text RESIST to 50409 and Resistbot will generate faxes to your congresscritter and both Senators.

    • SeeTrain65

      Mentioned above, but I watched two paid ads tonight (though I didn’t mention the second), the first from AARP advising citizens to inundate Portman with calls telling him to vote down this monumental atrocity, and another finally calling out Big Pharma and advising everyone to vote Yes on the Ohio Drug Price Relief Act.

      BTW: The one downside I found tonight: Looking up the ODPRA, I Googled it and found the first listing was a paid ad from the drug companies pumping their web site.

      Here’s what I found on Ballotpedia.
      https://ballotpedia.org/Ohio_Drug_Price_Standards_Initiative_(2017)

  • Truck Fump

    The stupid bastard who ran around the dark and dangerous alleyways of the Internet screaming for hackers to help him find Hillary’s murder mail, Peter Smith, apparently committed suicide, so don’t be surprised if “alt-right” crazies to turn this into another conspiracy involving Killinton ninja assassins. Clinton has no reason to kill him. TRUMP has a reason to have him killed. The man put Prez Trumpnuts one step closer to collusion with a foreign power.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      “But her emails…..”

  • HorseChestnut

    I hate finding myself on the same side as Insane Clown Posse.

  • La France est l’allié le plus ancien des États-Unis. Le Donald suce le penis d’animaux pour l’argent. Beaucoup de gens ne le savent pas!

  • x111e7thst

    ne m’emerdez pas avec vos histoires Don. Demerdez vous seul avec vos tres petites mains

  • Bitter Scribe

    During a speech at the National Student Leadership Conference, Pence said in order for a leader to be like the president, they must listen, be humble, have a character people respect, work to serve others and learn from other leaders.

    OK, as I see it, there are three alternatives:

    1) He’s trolling us.
    2) He’s trolling Trump.
    3) He really is that stupid.

    I vote for (3), but what do you all think?

    • SeeTrain65

      4) He’s a slobbering lapdog who’ll do what he’s told.

  • Lefty Wright

    Well, when it comes to the health insurance bill, we can always count on the brave Senator Tillis from my state taking a firm stand. “I’m supportive of anything right now to get to 51 votes”. But by that, he does not mean anything that would actually fix the ACA.

    http://www.newsobserver.com/news/politics-government/politics-columns-blogs/under-the-dome/article159006869.html

    • SeeTrain65

      It warmed my heart tonight to watch TV for the first time in a while and see AARP slamming the airwaves telling people to call Rob Portman and urge him not to vote for the Senate bill.

      It’s a fruitless gesture, but it gets the word out what a pile this thing this. And who knows? Maybe the empty-headed, empty-suited moron will actually listen.

  • Hardly Ideal

    I’ve said it before, but I really don’t comprehend the rush to Mars. I’m behind space exploration 1,000%, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. The International Space Station is nice, but it’s the space travel equivalent of tent camping in the back yard. It seems crazy to go from that to roughing it on the Red Planet.

    Colonizing the moon would be much easier. Closer to home for easier resupply and emergency assistance. That, and you can use the cargo catapult to hurl moon rocks at Trump trash palaces with impunity.

    • jaspersdad

      Make Trebuchets Great Again

    • Daybuh

      Tanstaafl!

  • Mystery_Poster

    Will the invisible border wall be like the emperor’s new clothes?

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