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Donald Trump is NOT mad at his greasy bad-faced namesake Donald Trump Jr. for taking a conspiracy meeting with a Russian lawyer lady, OK? Junior is not grounded, he will not have his puss-grabbing privileges taken away, and Daddy’s not going to slap him in the face in front of all his friends like he reportedly used to do when Junior was in college. So don’t worry!

Who’s in trouble then? Oh it is just Barack Obama, as usual. Trump explained in Paris on Thursday that his poor, innocent, stupid fuckbag of a son wouldn’t even have been able to meet that naughty Russian lawyer at Trump Tower if NOBUMMER and LORETTA LYNCH hadn’t let her into the country:

The lawyer that went to the meeting, I see that she was in the halls of Congress. Also, somebody said that her visa or her passport to come into the county was approved by Attorney General Lynch. Now maybe that’s wrong, I just heard that a little while ago, but I was a little surprised to hear that. So she was here because of Lynch.

Think Progress notes that Trump’s justification for blaming Obama and Loretta Lynch comes directly from a stupid article in the Hill written by wingnut John Solomon, and also from his precious Fox News.

Trump has a new interview with Reuters where he explains how Not Mad he is at Junior, and he also claims he had no idea his Picasso-face lookin’ firstborn was even having that meeting with the Russian lawyer, even though he was in the building at the time, and even though Trump campaign manager Paul Manafort and Trump sexxxy son-in-law Jared Kushner were in attendance. Of course, that is either the truth or a lie, but considering how it’s Donald Trump, we’ll assume it’s a lie to be on the safe side. Also, who among us WOULDN’T have tried to violate election law by conspiring with the Russians?

“I think many people would have held that meeting,” Trump said.

“It was a 20-minute meeting, I guess, from what I’m hearing,” Trump said. “Many people, and many political pros, said everybody would do that.”

Sad! Donald Trump is a fucking know-nothing, and he’s doing that thing he always does, where he says “many people” have said “everybody would do that,” just like when he says “everybody,” even including his opponents, agrees there were no conspiracy crimes between Trump and Russia. The “many people” and the “everybody” are presumably a combination of Sean Hannity, the “Fox & Friends” idiot couch, and the meat farts that explode out of his voluminous ass as he tweets on the toilet each morning.

For the record, approximately one million Republican campaign veterans have weighed in, and they all agree that literally NO SMART PATRIOTIC PERSON would have taken that meeting, and most say they would have called the FBI.

As Maggie Haberman and one of her work boyfriends report in the New York Times, blaming Junior for Junior’s Russian Fuckups is very unfair in the president’s eyes. You see, Trump calls his children “baby,” and nobody puts one of Trump’s babies in a corner. Also, there is the thing about how Don Jr. and Donald used to have a Family Feud with each other (see above re: slapping in public), and so Haberman says having Junior getting caught trying to do Russia conspiracies has been hurtful for Daddy. We imagine he’s proud of his boy for at least trying, though!

Trump has instead reportedly been very mad at his lawyer Marc Kasowitz, and also at White House Chief of Staff Reince Priebus, presumably because they have not snapped their fingers and made this whole “Russia” business go away and die.

We don’t know if Trump wants to slap Jared Kushner in the face over this meeting, but we’re gonna guess probably not. Kush and the Vank-Vank didn’t go to France with Daddy, because they have some kind of gabillionaires’ orgy to attend in Sun Valley, Idaho. Kushner, of course, failed to report his own attendance at the Russian sexxx meeting with Junior and Manafort on his security clearance filings, but he’s updated those filings right nice, along with like 100 other foreign sexxx contacts that had slipped his mind. Don’t judge him, you assholes. If you scrolled through your iPhone contacts right now, we’re sure you’d find a lot of no-names you met drunk at a bar, but who are nonetheless in your “contacts.” Of course, for Jared Kushner and everybody else who’s ever met Donald Trump, every single one of those no-names is a Russian spy, so maybe they’re not just like you.

(By the by, Attorney General Jeff Sessions was supposed to release an updated list of all his Russian sexxx contacts this week too. His DOJ complied, by releasing a blank page. Good job, pork chop!)

If we may return to Reuters for a second, Trump exposed himself as an easily scammed dipshit in a different Russian way in that interview, when he talked about asking Vladimir Putin whether he directed the 2016 election stealing/hacking:

“I said, ‘Did you do it?’ And he said, ‘No, I did not. Absolutely not.’ I then asked him a second time in a totally different way. He said absolutely not,” Trump said.

CASE CLOSED! Donald Trump The Good Salesman knows how to spot a con, so he knows Putin was telling him the truth, because you know why? Because Putin called Trump “brilliant” one time (not brilliant like “smart,” brilliant like “shiny”), therefore he would never lie to Trump, and he certainly isn’t laughing at Trump behind his back. No not ever.

In conclusion, Donald Trump is not mad at Junior, Jared, Jefferson Beauregard or Vladimir for their involvement in the Russian hacking/stealing of the 2016 election. Barack Obama, Loretta Lynch, Reince Priebus and Trump’s own lawyer Marc Kasowitz better get ready to feel the sting of Trump’s tiny hand swatting them right on their bare bottoms, though.

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[Reuters / New York Times / Think Progress]

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  • memzilla Ω
    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      Keep pushing, boys!

      • kaydenpat

        And lock the door and throw away the key.

    • You know, I don’t remember Jimmy Carter or Barack Obama ever having to have ministers come and pray over him to convince people they were moral humans.

      • BigCSouthside

        Cuz Barry Hussein is a filthy atheist mooslim that’s why

        • Riley Whodat Venable

          He was Natzi Comnist too!

    • kaydenpat

      Perfect way to take a photo of Evangelicals praying for Trump and turn it into what it really should be.

    • WIDTAP

      I am a little surprised the other guys allowed the fellow with the fingernail polish in the same meeting.

      • ThePuckStopsHere

        I think that’s Kids Rock who either snuck back in or never left.

  • SadDemInTex
  • BreakingDeadMen

    This is stupid and pathetic, even for these assholes.

    • kaydenpat

      Like everything else about them. This is who they are. They always try to shift the blame to someone else for their screw ups.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        I remember the first time there was a Bush screwup (W, not daddy). I don’t remember what the screwup was, I just remember the reaction. W did everything he could to point the finger at everyone who might have been in Washington at that time. I thought how odd it was, because Presidents didn’t do that.

  • Scooby

    I remember Obama wore the tan suit as a signal to start this conspiracy.

    • GoutMachine

      WRONG! It was ordering fancy mustard on a hamburger!

  • PubOption

    Is Dok going to report on Ivanka and Jared heading to Sun Valley?

    • armed_bears

      Hmmm. The signpost in the back of their instagrams says “Солнечная долина”

  • GoutMachine
  • Mystery_Poster

    In the tall buildings
    Sit the head of our nations
    Worthy men from Spain and Siam
    All day discussions with the Russians
    But they still went ahead
    And vetoed the plan
    Now up jumped the U.S. representative
    He’s the one with the tired eyes
    747 for the midnight condition
    Flyin’ back from a peace keepin’ mission

    • Beautiful Soup

      Nickstrodamus predicted this!

      • Bobathonic

        You had to go Lowe to find that one.

  • Belasaurius

    Lolita (AKA Ivanka) has been strangely quiet on this one.

    • BigCSouthside

      Does anyone ACTUALLY care what she says

      • shastakoala

        Lawyers?

      • Yr. Gma

        That’s never stopped her before from flapping her surgically altered lips.

        • BigCSouthside

          She’s architecting a response

    • weejee

      Likely her hubby dropped the dime on Fredo.

    • kaydenpat

      Her hubby and brother are going down. She probably is stunned at how mean D.C. is. Princess Ivanka didn’t grow up around mean people.

  • arglebargle

    Would you please stop using the phrase, “Trump exposed himself…”

  • It’s almost as if their mob lawyer is trying to set up some sort of entrapment defense. Of course it’s hard to say you were entrapped by a person you invited over to discuss election law violations.

    • weejee

      Hey, Vito Corleone recommended him.

      • BrianW

        Objection! Vito had good lawyers. Remember the comment about him having as many lawyers in his pocket as a bootblack has pieces of silver.

  • Crystalclear12

    So, I guess Sessions is new at this too, right?

  • Canis Greyhame

    I mean, when you think about it, isn’t this whole fiasco really Obama’s fault for failing to stop the Trumps from committing crimes in the first place? You can’t blame the Trumps for that!

    • kaydenpat

      It’s Obama’s fault for not going back in time and preventing Papa and Mama Trump from meeting in the first place. Shame on him!

      • Three Finger Salute

        Yeah, thanks Obama. I would have loved to see him play Johnny B. Goode and do the duck walk.

  • Fitzgerald Chesterfield

    I am convinced that Junior thought he was having a stripper-gram delivered to the office.

  • weejee
  • AnnieGetYerFun

    “I just heard it, I don’t know if it’s true, but I’m going to repeat it on a live broadcast because I know my slobbering, illiterate base will devour and regurgitate whatever I crap out on the tee-vee.”

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      Whoa! Looks like Roddy Piper managed to destroy the FOX satellite antenna!

  • Jo Mathie

    If someone gave me a handful of fridge magnets I’d still come up with something more credible than team Trump to excuse this (insert expletive) show.

    • kaydenpat

      Your dogs could probably come up with a better excuse than what Trump and his sycophants have come up with. You’d think by now they could coordinate their lies better but naw.

      • Jo Mathie

        Alas I only have two rescue cats, but they have actually made things that at least made me smile when they were stupid and had a fight with fridge magnets and scattered them on the floor.

  • AnnieGetYerFun

    Do attorneys general approve visas? I mean, other than S visas?

  • Bill D. Burger

    “If Loretta Lynch hadn’t let that woman in the country, my high quality son would not have met with her. Bitch set him up.”

    • kaydenpat

      As Jimmy Buffett so eloquently put it,
      “Some people claim that there’s a woman to blame,
      But I know it’s nobody’s fault.”

      • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

        My favorite Buffet line, “We have become the people our parents warned us about.”

  • IAMBOWLINGGREEN

    And when the pee pee tapes are released, he’ll say : ‘Most people would meet Russian prostitutes in a hotel room to be urinated on. And I would not have done it if Obama hadn’t been President at the time.’

    • kaydenpat

      Actually since it is rumored that he asked the prostitutes to pee on the bed because the Obamas had previously slept in it, he may be able to make that argument.

      • cmd resistor

        Sadly, many of his supporters will think it was a good and funny idea. Obummer.

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenResistance
    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      The deliberate misspelling is a nice touch.

    • Nounverb911

      Him first, with votes, next November….

    • GoutMachine

      GAH! I just had to look at his face. Dammit. (Also, some weird combo of Grandpa Munster and … ugh, I can’t look again to complete the thought.)

      • Bub, the truculent Zombie

        There’s a little touch of Liberace there, it seems to me.

        • GoutMachine

          Oh damn! You’re right!

    • Every time he smiles I think of the Alex from a Clockwork Orange.

      • GoutMachine

        Ah, the Kubrick stare

        • Lance Thrustwell

          Half the images on that page aren’t even from Kubrick films!

      • SeeTrain65

        What a coincidence! When I see him smile, I think he’s terminally evil and I vomit uncontrollably.

    • kaydenpat

      Please stop associating him with Canada. I beg this of you.

      • Bobathonic

        I always think of him as a Cuban.

        • Pilotshark

          Cuban Canadian as he is not America.

          • Three Finger Salute

            Didn’t Zodiac fan the flames of that Castrogate nothingburger about Trudeau too?

          • Riley Whodat Venable

            Canadian Cuban American

            CACA.

        • cmd resistor

          I don’t think of him as Cuban. I don’t think he can even speak Spanish. And doubt he’d know a black bean if it paid him.

          • Bobathonic

            It’s more about my desire to reject him than anything else. Sometimes I’m petty like that.

          • Riley Whodat Venable

            They don’t let Black beans in his club. Or gefilta fish.

      • TJ Barke

        Well then do something about Alberta…

    • arglebargle

      “more painless”? I think not.

  • Swampay

    Trump has instead reportedly been very mad at his lawyer Marc Kasowitz, and also at White House Chief of Staff Reince Priebus, presumably because they have not snapped their fingers and made this whole “Russia” business go away and die.”

    There is not enough money in the world to make me consider being #45’s lawyer (assuming I in fact knew anything about lawyering). Kasowitz must be supremely greedy, supremely stupid, and/or supremely slimy to be willing to take this gig.

    • Covfefe’s Evil Twin

      Not knowing anything about lawyering would probably be a giant advantage, fwiw.

    • kaydenpat

      If Kasowitz was so greedy, he wouldn’t take this gig because everyone knows that Trump doesn’t pay for services or goods.

      • Bad Tom

        That speaks to his stupidity.

  • CutterTeam

    Bill Cosby could have stood up in the middle of court and said “Actually, your Honor, THEY drugged and raped ME” and it wouldn’t be more fucked up than this shit.

    • GoutMachine

      Ten bucks that’s his strategy in the next trial.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Mr. Trump bridles at the idea that his children, who have not spent years in the public spotlight like him, are now facing unrelenting scrutiny over what he believes to be a manufactured scandal by the news media.

    And had they largely stayed out of the campaign, a la Tiffany, we’d take a hands-off approach. As it is, they chose to take an active role, and they can fucking well take personal responsibility for their part in the collusion TYVM…

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/c607cdf90a11e967296ca48d8e4f3e1ebad8bec9be0b13e85f9e242b58e6b529.jpg

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      One has a goddamn office in the White House.

      Tell me again how they deserve no scrutiny, Mister Predisent.

  • Michael Smith

    Lynch and Obama forced DJT2 to meet with the Russian lawyer. Right. That’s like how liberals forced Republicans to elect Donald Trump because we were so condescending.

    • kaydenpat

      It only makes sense if you take out your brain and replace it with the brain of a wingnut.

      • FlownΩver

        Objection – assumes etc.

  • SeeTrain65

    “Hey, you don’t let her fly over, we don’t have the meeting! All our corruption is on you, Obama!”

    And, in the words of Lewis Black, if it hadn’t been for that horse, I’d have never spent that year in college.

  • Bill D. Burger
    • kaydenpat

      The other Uday/Qusay Brother is missing.

  • ken_kukec

    “everybody says” = one of my idiot lickspittles told me

    “nobody knows” = I just found out

  • Anna Rompage

    Who knew that Lynch personally signed off on every visa application from Russian nationals that ware submitted during her tenure?

    I mean to me, this seems like something that would be well below her pay grade, and it makes me wonder how she got anything else done, considering the numbers of Russians that visit the US every year

    • GoutMachine

      Next, he’ll accuse Obama of using his time machine to make Russian lawyer’s parents do the nasty and conceive her.

    • Beanz&Berryz

      And. Her Russian passport was Lynch’s fault?? Quell moran.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      it would have been Kerry personally signing off on them anyways. Dumbfuck Donnie doesn’t even understand how the State Dept works

      • GoutMachine

        We have, like, 50 of them, right?

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Friends who have known the Trump family for many years said they believed Donald Trump Jr., in setting up the meeting, was only focused on trying to help — and even impress — his father with information that could help his campaign.

    Say, you know who else was only trying to help?

  • CutterTeam

    Wife: “Honey, are you banging the babysitter?”
    Husband: “Yes, but you’re the one who hired her.”
    Wife: “I see your point, and I apologize.”

    • TJ Barke

      “She’s just so sexy, I don’t know what I was thinking…”

      • jodyleek

        No, the appropriate way to defend adultery is to say it’s because you are so damn patriotic, a la Newty Newt.

        • arglebargle

          Dammit…

      • arglebargle

        “I guess I’m just too patriotic.”

    • Michael Smith

      A classic role-playing scenario from the GOP’s Handbook for New Legislators.

  • Doug Langley

    Old MAD magazine bit:

    “But everyone, simply everyone is talking about it!!”
    “Everyone?”
    “Most of them. Some of them. A few.”
    “Keep going . . .”
    “Carolyn Lickspittle.”

  • Bill D. Burger

    Look PaPa! I made the cover of time.

    ~SLAP!~

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DEnQFbUUAAAqTgA.jpg

    • Flashman

      I hope this shows up in some Trump golf clubhouse.

  • kaydenpat

    “I think many people would have held that meeting,” Trump said.
    “Because I’m a sleazy idiot and I think that everyone is just like me.”

  • Komsumverweigerer Ron

    This was the best you could do, Two Scoops? Really? Dammit, man, now you’re just phoning it in. We expect MORE from you, you pathetic orange man-baby.
    (Seriously, this is weaksauce stuff. Could Our Donnie be running low on enthusiasm, finally? Is this the prelude to his walking out the door, never to return? Will we no longer have Donald Judas Trump to kick around any more? Stay tuned!)

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Most 8 year old kids could come up with something more creative

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Nobody offered a more passionate defense of Ivanka than Donald Trump Jr.

    “Look at the attacks on Ivanka,” he told Mr. Hannity on Tuesday night. “If she was anyone else’s daughter, she’d be a feminist icon — this incredible, brilliant, well-spoken woman. And they try to belittle her at every chance. It’s really sad.”

    1. Feminist icons generally don’t work to elect serial sexual assaulters to the White House.

    2. What’s really sad is that Ivanka only cares about feminism when she is milking it to make a profit.

    3. Oh, for fuck’s sake.

    • SeeTrain65

      Remove the “I” from “Icon” and you’ve got something there, Cally.

    • rosenbomb

      The right loves carrying on about this. Being “incredible, brilliant & well-spoken”* does not a feminist make.

      *and it’s debatable whether Ivanka is ANY of these things

    • GoutMachine

      Well, unless she were Hillary’s daughter, in which case you’d mock her mercilessly during her awkward teen years…

      • calliecallie

        And beyond.

        • calliecallie

          Which reminds me. Whatever happened to Amy Carter?

    • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

      Again, Republicans believe that women just vote with their bleedin’ whatevers. So if an actual feminist attacks a faux-feminist, they must not be a real feminist.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Michelle Obama is LMAO

    • BigCSouthside

      Feminist icons also tend to not get every job they’ve ever had because of their last name

  • Nounverb911
    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      These kind of scenes likely played out between Fred Sr and Fred Jr also. People who only needed to manage their wealth and enjoy it. All society really asked of them.

    • Ωbjectifier

      Who wears a suit to a ballgame?

      • SeeTrain65

        The same people who eat taco bowls on Cinco de Mayo.

      • BigCSouthside

        Donald Trump is a poor mans idea of a rich man, and poor people think suits=rich

        • Celtic_Gnome

          They grew up watching the teevee where their “betters” got up every morning and put on a suit no matter what they had planned that day like Oliver Douglas on Green Acres.

      • MamaBrown

        the kind of people who think a gold toilet is classy

      • cmd resistor

        One time I was doing a google image search on Trump to see if his mother really had that hairdo in the picture that pops up so often. Of all the photos with family, I saw just one of him and a kid at a ballgame that looked like normal people. All the rest were posed, or in suits, etc.

      • Komsumverweigerer Ron

        The owner? The manager? The sportscasters? DEFINITELY not the fans.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      No. Dad is continuing to abusively bully him by forcing him to incriminate himself in hopes it will save his own skin.

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      This is believable as you can just picture Donald’s huge meaty hands knocking lil Donny One-Scoop down.

      This also explains the chin. SUCH FORCE, MANY STRONG.

  • Crystalclear12

    It’s not Hillary’s fault?
    Are you sure?
    This fuck up is email related, you know.

  • Daniel Hooper

    “I think many people would’ve held that meeting”

    Yeah; most people would hold it after calling the FBI to set up a sting operation, not actively collude with a foreign government.

  • Ωbjectifier

    Also, somebody said that her visa or her passport to come into the county was approved by Attorney General Lynch.

    That’s not how any of this works. Visas are granted by State, not Justice.

    • Anna Rompage

      What, so it’s Hillary’s fault?

      Say it ain’t so!

      • Ωbjectifier

        Kerry at that time.

        • Anna Rompage

          We all know Kerry was just a puppet of Hillary, and she had her hand up his ass controlling his every move….

          • Then, Hillary definitely should have shaken hands with Donald. Then pulled out some hand sanitizer and cleaned her hands off after the handshake.

          • Doug Langley
          • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

            Not a puppet! Not a puppet! YOU’RE the puppet!

        • Doug Langley

          Pfft. He was just following the orders she emailed him.

        • Lordpnut

          Fucking patrician with all his “nuance” and book-larnin’.

      • Cleo_Cat

        Jinx

    • Cleo_Cat

      Hillary’s fault!!11!! Lock her up!!11!!

    • Daniel Hooper

      In Trump’s defense, he doesn’t really care one way or another.

      • FlownΩver

        Or know.

      • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

        He’s only talking to his moron base, anyway. BLAME THE BLACK LADY and YEAH MAGA!

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      Apparently there are certain circumstances in which the AG can approve a visa, but it has to do with obtaining information regarding potential terrorist activities.

      • cmd resistor

        That Hill story says Lynch signed off on some special permission so the lawyer could come here specifically to defend some Russian client in a case. She managed to get around a bit while she was here. That Rohrerbach guy sat near her at some dinner but like everyone who meets with Russians, sort of forgot the details.
        Also, too, the winguts have all kinds of spin on it, including one theory that Obama and Lynch let her in so she could wiretap Trump Tower.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    I think many people would have held that meeting

    Guess again, asshole

    • I would have definitely taken that meeting . . . wearing an FBI wire.

  • Bill D. Burger

    What a fucking embarrassment. Dimwit asshole. Macron has to lead him around like training stump.

    https://twitter.com/AynRandPaulRyan/status/885518397668155396

    • Anna Rompage

      Just wait until Donad gets tired, and has to use a golf cart to get around…

      • Canis Greyhame

        Well with those manners, it’s as if they carted him in on the back of a turnip truck and dumped him directly into French high society. So I guess a golf cart to wheel him back out would be a bit of an upgrade.

        • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

          Well, the French don’t care about manners and protocol so it’s fine HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

      • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

        Oh, zis? Eet es ze Franch how you say, le golfe carte. We call zem ‘tumbrils,’ please entre, sil vous plait, and they shall wheesk you off to les Bastille Day fête!

  • OT, but did anyone else hear about Trump Sr. perving on Brigitte Macron today? I really hope they don’t need any furniture soon. Otherwise she may be in for a really rough afternoon.

    • Edith Prickly

      He already tried to yank her arm off when he shook her hand. Fortunately, I think her husband, Le Concasseur de Mains, will keep Trump in line.

    • Suse

      Yeah, told her she was in great shape and beautiful while Malaria was right there. Such class.

    • cmd resistor

      He told her she was in “great shape.”

      • Persistent Tennessee Rain

        Let’s all be thankful that he didn’t add a comment about their age difference.

        • cmd resistor

          Surprised he didn’t, actually.

        • Jamoche

          I suspect he only has some vague categories: “too young to legally bang”, “old enough to bang”, and “time to dump for a younger model”.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      Oh God, it’s so sickening and embarrassing. First the faux-alpha dominance hand-yank, then absurdly and offensively commenting on how “fit” she is to her HUSBAND like he’s judging a prize steer. He does nothing but try to bully and achieve dominance in the most putrid and stupid ways.

    • cmd resistor

      I think the ladies were going off on their own, so she will get somewhat of a break till they have to eat dinner together.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        I wonder how circumspect Melania is when it’s just “us girls” dishing. I figure she’s pretty isolated in the WH and has to watch everything she says there.

  • Bill D. Burger
    • TJ Barke

      To do the meme right Don Jr’s reply should be: “Oh, you know, treason stuff…”

    • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

      Again, from the brilliant Stephen Colbert: “Now Don, Jr. will have time to spend on his favorite pastime: Brawny Man cosplay.”

      • Lordpnut

        Such a delicate snowflake as he should be careful about going into the woods alone…

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Asked if he believed Putin’s denial, Trump paused.

    “Look. Something happened and we have to find out what it is, because we can’t allow a thing like that to happen to our election process. So something happened and we have to find out what it is,” he said.

    About Putin, he added: “Somebody did say if he did do it, you wouldn’t have found out about it. Which is a very interesting point.”

    Shorter Donald:

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/64f4c0a67863c45a4e7c81b5a97e28fb03acf83376011aba23defe5239a1389f.jpg

  • Donkey Option

    “Then I asked him a second time in a totally different way.”

    Trump: Did you hack our election?
    Putin: Niet.
    Trump: (Passes Putin a note)
    Note: Do you like me <3?
    Putin: Circles "Niet"

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    umm, Donnie? Do you really want to talk about letting Russian spies into the country?

    150 so far and counting, despite the IC begging you to slow the fuck down…

    http://www.cnn.com/2017/07/06/politics/russia-steps-up-spying-efforts-after-election/index.html

    • Three Finger Salute

      But Syrian kids are terrorists!!!11oneoneone1eleventy911!!

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    “I am not a person who goes around trusting lots of people. But he’s the leader of Russia. It is the second most powerful nuclear power on earth. I am the leader of the United States. I love my country. He loves his country,” Trump said.

    Putin loves his country, so we an trust him? Really?!?

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ca08daa1e0c533bbb9f6b127d4218ad78c142a3d717b5419128184d57a9e5e97.gif

    • Blackest Noobs

      now imagine if Barry said this shit….imagine Trump’s reaction to it…and that tells you EVERYTHING about Donald J. Trump.

    • Michael Smith

      There are different ways of loving your country. People like Trump and Putin love their countries because they’ve figured out great and effective ways of exploiting everyone and maintaining a position of wealth and dominance.

      That’s not the same kind of “loving your country” that you see in the VFW, or in a small town on the 4th of July – in fact, its quite the opposite! But Trump has convinced the small town and the VFW that he feels the same way they do.

      • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

        Putin and Trump love their countries the way I love the surf and turf special at a good restaurant on my birthday (sorry, not a vegan).

      • Lordpnut

        “A man should always support his country. And his government when it deserves it.” -Mark Twain

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      Yeah, and that country’s interests, as defined by Putin, are diametrically opposed to our own. Russia benefits when the U.S. is weakened, which is why they helped you get elected you total shitbrain (meaning Trump).

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      Besides, Putin doesn’t love his country. If he did, he wouldn’t be bleeding it dry and corrupting it beyond repair.

  • Michael Smith

    On Facebook a Moran I know shared an article from the Daily Caller, which said that collusion with foreign governments is not unprecedented.

    Two of the examples are bullshit Clinton Cash stories, in which the Clintons allegedly accept money from foreign donors. Another one is Ted Kennedy meeting on his own with some Russians in 1983 in an attempt to set up televised interviews to get the Russian perspective directly to the American people, rather than having all USSR information being filtered through Reagan, who Ted believed wanted war with the USSR at any pretense.

    The last one is when Nixon stalled the peace meetings in Saigon ahead of the 1968 election so that ending the war would continue to be an issue that he could run on! That one is very true. But I’m not sure it should be cited with approval as precedent for what Trump has done.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      False equivalence: you’re doing it wrong.

    • kaydenpat

      I doubt Mueller is going to buy into such nonsense. That argument may work in Rightwing la la land but it doesn’t work in the real world.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        and that’s why these clowns will fail. None of them understand the difference between winning the news cycle and prevailing in court

    • Three Finger Salute

      I often envision a parallel universe where we had 24 years of straight Kennedy presidencies and then Carter in ’84 and ’88. Followed by Clinton-Gore-Obama-Clinton.

  • Doug Langley

    I don’t recall Nixon ever saying “I think a lot of people would have burgled the DNC headquarters.”

    • Blackest Noobs

      he did…it’s on the missing part of the Nixon tapes.

      • So those 18 1/2 minutes are when Trump was trying to grab Rose Mary Woods by the pussy?

        • Doug Langley

          Hmm . .. that could explain how she twisted into the weird position necessary to erase the tape.

    • Michael Smith

      He did say things to the effect of “The Democrats do the same things and worse, and the goddamn media knows it! They’ve always had it out for me.. they hate the little guy. Kennedy could get away with anything!”

      Nixon and Trump are different in many ways, but they have a similar paranoia and belief that everyone is as dishonest as they are.

      • But Nixon had some working brain cells.

        • Three Finger Salute

          He even had some policies and proposals that would make today’s NSGOP think he’s a RINO or a downright commie. The EPA, Medicare for All and mincome. Only one of which he actually did, but still, Republicans today think “green is the new red” and describe “tree huggers” as “cucks.” Teddy fucking Roosevelt would be a cuck to them, because he didn’t just shoot that goddamn bear for walking while black.

    • Bill D. Burger
      • Doug Langley

        At least Tricky Dick knew how to take a picture.

        • Jamoche

          Well, after it was driven into him that appearance matters in the era of TV. Imagine what a world we’d have if someone had just convinced him of that before the Kennedy debate.

      • kaydenpat

        Needs to go viral on Twitter.

      • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

        If nothing else, that’s a great Bioshock villain portrait Trump’s got there.

    • kaydenpat

      Nixon was devious but he was also very intelligent. Trump not so much.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      THIS. THIS is the worst thing about the Trump “administration.” It forces old Berkeley lefties like myself to think fondly back to NIXON.

  • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

    The hypocrisy and projection are enough to make a cynic scream “My god, you are a depressing ass!”

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      It’s the stupid, too. You you’re not even trying, Don.

  • Sophia

    I know for a fact that Jim would have doneit

  • Walter Wellstone

    I don’t have kids but I’ve been told the little weasels will always blame someone else for the fuck-ups, is that right? Is that what we’re seeing here? Donald is basically a toddler up his fucked up little head, right?

    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      Not when raised right. They will in the beginning but as time and trust grows they will start being honest.

      • Walter Wellstone

        That means Donald’s mom did a real number on him. Poor bastard.

        • SeeTrain65

          Let’s not forget ol’ Fred, too. He did plenty of damage.

          • Walter Wellstone

            Bottom line: he’s one fucked up motherfucker.

        • Courser_Resistance

          He’s been fucking broken from the start. No reason to punish our entire country because mummy didn’t love him. Waaah!

        • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

          There’s essentially two ways to create a sociopath out of your kid. One way is ridiculously strict parenting that creates the idea that the application of force is the only right and wrong in the universe. The other is basically no parenting at all, with no sense of boundaries or limits imposed on the kid.

          Trump is a poster child for the latter. He’s an absurdly pampered child crying out for Mom and Dad’s approval and attention.

          • Celtic_Gnome

            Well, it’s been reported that the only family picture in the oval office is his father.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        normal, well adjusted children morally and ethically mature- Donnie, not so much

      • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

        Well, my experience has been that some lying will take place during the teen years- because they wouldn’t be teenagers if they didn’t, but hopefully not too much.

    • Courser_Resistance

      Most of us figure it out that doesn’t work by about age 6. Once you start school, not many people buy into that bullshit.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      I also think he forced his son to release the emails to try and take the heat off himself.

      • exinkwretch

        “Do it. I can pardon you if if gets your ass in a sling!”

        • Bad Tom

          Unless you’re prosecuted in a state court somewhere.

  • canes_pugnaces

    It turns out the constitution has been suspended for the next 3.5 years. Not to worry. Trump is president.

  • Jamoche

    “I said, ‘Did you do it?’ And he said, ‘No, I did not. Absolutely not.’ I then asked him a second time in a totally different way. He said absolutely not,” Trump said.

    Oh, Donnie, don’t you know you have to ask three times before they’re forced to tell the truth?

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      Try punching him in the face, Mr. Precedent. Since that seems to be a part of your parenting MO.

    • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

      Somebody’s been watching “Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me”!

    • biologydave
  • StlSaxist

    Many of his supporters are THAT stupid as to believe this. Sad!

  • OddMan

    Good ol boy Jeffrey Beauregard Sessions was busy giving a secret talk to a right wing religious organization last night. If fact one designated a hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center.

    https://twitter.com/petemont/status/885120921186467840

    • Zippy W Pinhead
      • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

        The ballsy part is where he claims such a disclosure would violate his “personal privacy”.
        The guy who would put genital inspectors in every restroom if given the opportunity and wants to know what you’re doing in your bedroom is concerned about his privacy being violated in a matter of actual national security. It’s enraging.

        • OrdinaryJoe

          The Redumblican voters just don’t give a fuck.

    • What was all that noise about Hillary releasing the text from her speeches at Goldman-Sachs?

    • Shanzgood

      Pence had a similar meting with a bunch of anti-choice activists as well.

  • MamaBrown

    “It was a 20-minute meeting, I guess, from what I’m hearing,” Trump said. “Many people, and many political pros, said everybody would do that.”

    What is it with these privileged fucksticks and 20 minutes? Is it like the 5 second rule? If something took 20 minutes or less its not heinous and horrible? Brock Turner’s shitrag father invoked the 20 minute rule to excuse the reprehensible actions of his rapist son too. Being a poor person I don’t understand these things. The rich really are different from you and me, I guess.

    • Walter Wellstone

      20 minutes is probably the most Melania has to endure having him on top of her. Not bad considering the alternative.

      • SeeTrain65

        Namely, the 23 hours and 40 minutes of not having him on top of her.

      • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

        And that’s 20 minutes TOTAL, over 12 years of marriage.

    • whitroth

      Maybe it’s that’s how long it takes the Orange Doodie to walk into a room, take off his clothes, pop off, and get dressed and leave…. This is, of course, assuming it takes him 5 min to undress, and 10 to dress, since it takes him 5 min just to mis-tie his tie….

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Ahem, Donald, you’re lame. It should be an 18 1/2 minute meeting.

      • Bad Tom

        Trump always rounds UP.

    • Jamoche

      It takes him 20 minutes to write a two-part tweet, so for him, that’s no time at all

      https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/25027350-f62b-4ca7-8069-e91ec3d628cd

  • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

    I just heard that a little while ago, but I was a little surprised to hear that. So she was here because of Lynch.

    Let’s assume for one second that (and I can’t believe I’m typing this) Dampnut is ri–
    Dampnut is rrrrr—–
    RIGHT. Lynch signed off on her visa. This is not a criminal act. Her being in the US isn’t a criminal act. But her being in Dampnut’s building, on Dampnut’s floor, with Dampnut’s son and Dampnut’s son-in-law and Dampnut’s campaign manager, attempting to sell or trade “secrets” disguised as oppo? Yeah, THAT’S a crime.

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      Why didn’t they stop me from committing a crime they had no knowledge of???

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      Hey, hey, now. Both Lynch and Obama are black. You didn’t consider that, did you?

  • OneWhiteWhisker

    The fuck is asked in a totally different way?? “Do it you did?” “You it did do?” “Durr yurr it bloo?”

    • cmd resistor

      Ix-nay dood-it-nay?

  • Mormos

    “by releasing a blank page.” hahaha! sessions is a piece of shit but i have to admire the man’s cojones.

    • Better contempt of court than perjury?

    • WotsAllThisThen

      If he had real cojones he’d release a xerox copy of his ass.

      • Jon Sussex

        We’re going to need a bigger printer.

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      We’re all admiring his cojones.

      FACT: That “blank page” was actually a photograph of his old white balls, laying gently on a white sheet.

      • Suse

        Oh, thanks.

      • jaspersdad

        I want to see that photoshopped onto KAC’s (pronounced cack) blank pages from yesterday.

      • Lordpnut

        Isn’t that a Matisse painting?

      • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

        FACT: That “blank page” was actually a photograph of his old white balls, laying gently on a white sheet….in a white hood.

        FIFY.

        • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

          Jeffie is goin’ KKKOMMANDO!

      • Bub, the truculent Zombie

        As uptight as that demented little racist Keebler elf is, I suspect his balls are a rather vivid shade of blue.

  • The Wanderer

    Meanwhile, the swarm of venial bastards laughably called the GOP Caucus is tig-welding together a massive, hippo sized dildo to fuck the poor and the young. We can call it Trumpcare.

    • Serai 1

      That would be “venal”. “Venial” is a specific type of sin in Catholicism. :)

      • The Wanderer

        The word was chosen deliberately.

        • Serai 1

          So his sins aren’t really that serious?

    • Suse

      Fiona libelz!11!!

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Tig welding implies too much finesse. They are slapping it together with rivets.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        More like duct tape and baling wire, really

        • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

          Chewing gum and a band-aid.

          • Opiwan

            spit and snot?

      • Bad Tom

        Badly riveted rivets.

  • Lordpnut

    “Picasso-face lookin’ firstborn”? That’s mean, motherfuckin’ mean. Fine work as always, Evan.

    • laughingnome

      Picasso-face? So Pablo is Don Jr.’s dad. I always suspected a Spaniard.

  • Serai 1

    Such a fucking child…

    • Suse

      AOT, K.

    • Pisto75666

      Child libel!

      • Serai 1

        Nah, I’ve known plenty of children exactly like him.

  • Ding dang dumb libels! Jus’ cuz a feller is arunnin fer pre-zi-dent of these here United States of ‘Merica don’t mean he knows all the laws and such ’bout runnin’ elections. All y’all don’t know the laws, neither, so stop being hippie critics nd ‘xpectin’ the Ol’ Pussy Grabber much less his boy ta knowed them. That thar boy is inn-o-cent and pee-ure as drivin’ snow. Yous can tell jus’ ta look at him. He thought he was ahelpin’ his pa jus’ like any good kid would. You ding dang dumb libels would know that iffn you had raised yerself any good kids instead of the taker brats all y’all manage to have.

    • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

      I’d just like to point out that Paul Manafort has something like 40 years of experience in campaigning….so that argument just don’t hunt.

      • Is talkin’ ’bout Don Don and the Ol’ Pussy Grabber. Sides Paul Mani-Pedi-Forte hadn’t worked on a campaign since Nixon! He’s been in the U-crane doin’ all the politics over thar with those ‘uns. Ding dang dumb libels. I gots to do all the thinkin fer ya.

  • Jenny

    But Hillary is so crooked, we needed to cheat to beat her.

    Something something Lance Armstrong defense!

    • Werewolf

      Okay, I’ll just say that in the early ‘Aughts, you really couldn’t win the TDF without doping. There’s a reason that Armstrong’s victories were vacated and not awarded to the second place finishers-it’s because you’d have to go way down the CG to get to someone who wasn’t doping. That said, Armstrong was a complete putz about it.

  • Anna Rompage

    Did you have sex with that woman?
    No, I did not
    Did you get it on with that person?
    No, I did not

    A blow job isn’t having sex, or getting it on with someone… Right?

    • ibwilliamsi

      Sweetie, that’s done and over with. Hell it’s so old you can’t even get the verbiage right, nor do you understand that it matters. Move into this century.

      • Anna Rompage

        Sorry, it was a snaky joke on Donad’s insistence that he asked Putin twice, in two different ways, and was told no both times, so he must be telling the truth…

      • Bad Tom

        That blowjob’s so old its children can vote.

    • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

      Everyone knows “eating isn’t cheating.”

  • Yeesh

    BARACK OBAMA is like LEX LUTHOR to these fucking cucks..

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Lex Luthor actually divested himself of all his business interests when he became President.

      • Ms.Moon

        Lex Luthor was actually completely fine with his bald head and was sexy while doing it too.

  • canes_pugnaces

    The Russian lawyer was in the US as part of a probatory immunity program, by order of a federal judge. Have we reached a point where no one knows anything, just what some fucking fat orange tv personality says? WTF?

  • Reximus
    • Three Finger Salute

      Rumor has it Junior had Russia snoop on Obama’s Spotify account to find out if he liked Huey Lewis and the News.

      • Up In Smoke O’hontas

        I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

  • Suse

    I have a theory that the Drumpy spawn all hate Daddy (maybe not Barron – yet). They’re kissing his ass and doing his bidding with their eyes on the prize – his yuuge fortune. It will be delicious if they’re all cut off without a cent because he’s either broke or left it all to his next wife.

    • theblackdog

      I’m betting on the former, with a touch of the current prenup with Melania.

  • ibwilliamsi

    That took longer to happen than I thought it would.

  • Bub, the truculent Zombie
    • Three Finger Salute

      Heil Houdini?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      He’s right, you know. Article 88 is a real thing, as if that was not obvious. But then again, there is that oath of office, about enemies of the Constitution, foreign and domestic.

      There’s a very very slippery slope obvious to anyone who is paying attention there.

    • Jamoche

      Only about 115 men were ever prosecuted under these rules, the vast majority of them for cussing out (depending on the war) either Lincoln, Wilson, or Roosevelt. Then, with the creation of the UCMJ in 1950, the rules changed slightly, removing enlisted members from the restriction and applying it only to officers. This made sense, too, because it is officers who have the legal authority to issue independent commands.

      Plus if you remove the ability of NCOs to swear about anything and everything, they won’t have anything left to say.

  • Three Finger Salute
    • Villago Delenda Est

      One of the greatest things about that guy is that he was not afraid of making fun of himself, as part of making a bigger point.

      I miss him so much.

      • Three Finger Salute

        I miss him too. I do look forward to reading the post-presidential memoir, though. Maybe he’ll really unload on the Dumpster Fire.

  • azeyote

    trump should just defer all questions to jim since he is the only one who knows what’s really goin down, and he can’t be found anyway –

  • Nockular cavity

    “Sure, I told Joey the Meathook to whack Giovanni, but who let Joey walk around on the street, if he was such a ‘suspect in multiple homicides?’ The cops, that’s who! So blame Johnny Law, not me!”

  • Villago Delenda Est

    Grassy Knoll? Obama was there! In diapers, of course, but there!

    • Bad Tom

      When I think of Trump, I get more of a Gassy Blow vibe.

  • Carpe Vagenda
    • pretty funny

    • Villago Delenda Est

      It’s not accidental that sysadmins often talk about using “the right incantation” to get the computer to do what they want them to do.

    • OutOfOrbit

      That is really fucked up.

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      Change. But not progress.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Well, it keeps Kid Rock from using the obvious campaign address, and hopefully gets a few donations for immigrant support groups.

    • Opalescent Riddles

      For those who haven’t seen the “magic”, click the KidRock4Senate.com within the tweet, not just any random location in the tweet.

  • Bub, the truculent Zombie
    • Bad Tom

      The tiny little cat TV viewing chair is so cute!

  • AnnieGetYerFun

    In totally off-topic news, my libido returned with a vengeance today after a year-long hiatus. I want to pretty much fuck everything I see. This is problematic.

    • Ms.MLG on Maui

      We need you at Slut Camp!

      • AnnieGetYerFun

        Wasn’t my application rejected last time?

        • Ms.MLG on Maui

          Things have changed!

      • Terri S

        Slut Camp, wait…why was I not informed that we have a Slut Camp?

        • Ms.MLG on Maui

          I’m finding it difficult to juggle being a Slut and organizing Slut Camp!

    • Don’t say that too loud, there may still be some of the incel trolls around somewhere.

      • AnnieGetYerFun

        I’ll keep it to a whisper, then.

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          Good thing it’s only in the Wonkette non-comments, and not on the Internet.

          • AnnieGetYerFun

            Ha! Like I’d be dumb enough to go on the internet!

    • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

      “Siri, give me directions to Annie’s….”

      • AnnieGetYerFun

        I have a meeting in a few minutes with someone that I CANNOT STAND and yet I can’t stop looking at his crotch. Hormones are weird.

        • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

          My best guy friends line “I fuck people I don’t even like.”

    • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

      I think this is what 10-mile runs and cold showers are for.

      • AnnieGetYerFun

        How about a one-block saunter and a can of Diet Coke? I’m not much of a runner.

        • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

          Reasonable compromise.

      • Komsumverweigerer Ron

        At the same time, if it can be arranged.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      OK, who triggered this? Mark Ruffalo? Chris Evans?

      • AnnieGetYerFun

        Ew, white dudes? Never.

        • MynameisBlarney

          white dudes libelz!

          • AnnieGetYerFun

            OK, I’ll admit to having a massive lady boner for Macklemore, even though I can’t justify it in any way. The tattoos? The lips? I don’t know, but I’d hit it every day of the week and twice on Sunday.

        • WIDTAP

          Even if they have a lot of money?

          • AnnieGetYerFun

            Who do you think I am? Melania?

        • Jamoche

          Idris Elba? The entire photo shoot for Black Panther?

          • AnnieGetYerFun

            Actually, Dev Patel is currently in first place in my spank bank.

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      Problematic? If you can limit it to ‘respectable humans’ you’ll probably be fine.

      “Steer clear of the chickens, those are ours!”
      –Republicans

    • OutOfOrbit

      Have you no toys? No batteries? No Lotion?

      • AnnieGetYerFun

        It’s more an issue of location. Open office plan and all that.

        • OutOfOrbit

          Well there are little ones you just slip into your panties. Straight face, now!

          • AnnieGetYerFun

            “My face is flushed? Oh, no, I’m just really excited by these sales stats! I mean, it’s amaaaaazzzzziiiiiiinnnnng…. wow.”

          • OutOfOrbit

            GO FOR IT!

          • OutOfOrbit

            Try not to think about a big black ball-sack slapping against your ass…

    • MynameisBlarney

      *nods*

      Go on.

    • Opalescent Riddles

      For some reason, now I have Roy Orbison’s “In Dreams” running through my head. I think it has something to do with Pabst Blue Ribbon.

      • Opalescent Riddles

        OK, so, somebody played around with the appropriate movie clips and came up with this thing:
        https://youtu.be/LGO4ZS7Cphw

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    “Many people, and many political pros, said everybody would do that.”

    Anonymous sources! Really, Donnie?

    • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

      Yeah, every time I hear him say something like that I just want ONE FUCKING REPORTER to say “Name one.”

      • clubseal

        And that’s why he’s limiting access to members of the press who wouldn’t even think of asking.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      /rolls eyes

      Of course, Donnie doesn’t get why I’m rolling my eyes.

    • Bad Tom

      His anonymous sources are GREAT!
      Ours suck.

  • Poly_Ester

    The one thing D learned from W is that Presnits create their own reality, which makes it Obama’s fault, QED

  • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

    Finally a scandal involving Obama. Now if only we could find something to pin on Hillary.

    • natoslug

      Well, I do blame her for President Trump. If only she’d been the electoral college winner rather than the person an overwhelming majority of Americans wanted as president, we wouldn’t have Turmp in office. She should have kept quiet about that underground pizza basement child risotto ring for just a few months more.

  • MynameisBlarney
    • Ms.MLG on Maui

      Hey…is Anna ok? Haven’t seen her around.

      • MynameisBlarney

        She was ok last time I saw her on here.

        It has been a few days though.

      • OutOfOrbit

        No news here.

    • NotDarkYet

      And that was the last time kitten allowed doggo on the couch! From now on, everything in that house belonged to kitten, obeyed kitten, adored kitten, worked for kitten, paid tribute to kitten, and pledged allegiance to kitten!

  • Cogswell – in a mirror darkly

    His royal anus, jr. is definitely his royal anus’ son and the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

    • Invisible Bunyip

      The turd doesn’t fall far from the … not sure I want to continue this metaphor.

  • pgjack

    It is Obama’s fault. He spent eight years being all dignified, smart and well spoken with a lovely family and having the whole world thinking he was a great man. How’s a dumb ass clown with a gang of grifters for family and friends supposed to compete with that?

    • ANNG14

      Applause!

  • jesterpunk

    OT but, he seems nice.Also he does have to represent the people in the area he represents not just the “economically anxious” voters. But I like how he frames it that people dont like him because of trump, no its because he is an asshole.

    http://time.com/4855848/michigan-facebook-post-muslims/

    (KALKASKA, Mich.) — A local official in northern Michigan refuses to apologize for sharing Facebook posts calling for the killing of “every last Muslim” and for nuclear weapons to be used on the world’s 10-largest Muslim-majority cities.

    Jeff Sieting, the village president in Kalkaska, which is about 230 miles (370 kilometers) northwest of Detroit, said Monday that he doesn’t owe anyone an apology over his Facebook posts, the Record-Eagle of Traverse City reported.

    The posts were discovered by area native Cindy Anderson, who along with others unsuccessfully sought an apology last month. They’re now looking to remove Sieting from office.

    “You ran for office to represent all of the people of this community, not just the white, non-Muslim ones,” Anderson said to Sieting. “You were supposed to represent all of your constituents.”

    One post Sieting shared said Muslims are destructive and “there is simply no place for them in our world.” The post also called for using nuclear weapons against the 10 largest Muslim-majority cities, as well as pilgrimage sites.

    Sieting said his comments are protected by the First Amendment and that those trying to oust him from office are only doing so because they oppose President Donald Trump.

    “I don’t expect everyone to see things the way I do,” he said.

    Sieting has also come under fire for a sign on his hotel, Hotel Sieting, that asks citizens to pray for Trump. That dispute began before Sieting’s Facebook posts were discovered.

    Local residents and others who helped create the Facebook group “Kalkaska Residents for Peace” are determining how to move forward after Sieting’s refusal to apologize. Anderson said the group of more than 150 people are looking at a potential recall and finding someone to run against him in 2018.

    Joyce Golden, a county resident who supports Sieting, said she believes the official has the right to post whatever he wants on his personal Facebook page.”If you don’t want to read it, get off of (his Facebook page),” she said. “From what I do know, you are a very honest, faithful, hardworking man and I thank you for that. I hope you continue and stand your ground for your beliefs. I don’t believe he has to represent everybody.”

    • MizzMazz

      Now, it’s been a long time since school civics classes, but if I recall correctly, yes you DO have to represent all of your constituents. I could be wrong, but that’s how I remember it.

    • CafeenMan

      Right… “Muslims are destructive” but we’re not even when we’re nuking ten major cities.

      • amrak63

        I get the point, but we only nuked two major cities.

    • clubseal

      And here we have someone in power who believes that the First Amendment protects his right to say all Muslims should be put to death (and in this case, not being a direct threat, I guess, he would be correct) but fails to acknowledge that there’s no protection against people finding it abhorrent.

      • jesterpunk

        He is a Trump supporter. not knowing things is kind of a requirement.

  • godofchunder
    • The KGB Ate Our Votes

      Really and truly frightening that Putin has it all over Trump.

  • Alex Grey
  • BMW

    This “We Know He’s an Asshole, But He’s Our Asshole and We’re Gonna Support Him” attitude the Republican Party has toward Donald Trump is getting older than old.

  • Bub, the truculent Zombie
    • clubseal

      So is he going to force retailers to make their employees say “Merry Christmas”? Small government, engage!

      • Bebecca

        and the rest of us too.

        • clubseal

          Coming soon from Kirk Cameron: “Training Day 2: Merry Christmas Enforcement Squad”

    • Opiwan

      Yeah, wait a whole 6 months and it will be Christmastime again, and I’m SURE Pat Robertson will say nothing BUT “Merry Christmas”. Tell me something original, Donny TwoScoops…

    • Peripatetic Poltroon

      You may rest assured that all the Merry-Christmas-sayers will be remembered. Once the political tides have turned, we will come for them first.

  • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

    OMG! Loretta was setting you up! She knew Donne QuarterScoop would treason, given half a chance, because of his green fresh new political naivete!

    (Expecting to hear a FOX On-Air Apologist float this balloon any minute now.)

  • The KGB Ate Our Votes

    The GOP is slipping. They left out Nancy Pelosi and Susan Rice. Sad!

  • Make Russia Great Again!

  • SCK

    Jeez, as always, it’s like my stupid uncle talking. “Somebody said”??? You would think the president of the United States wouldn’t talk like he’s trying to prove to all of us how smart and connected he is when clearly he doesn’t know what the fuck he’s talking about.

  • Lyly Sirivong
  • Republican’s insist that Junior’s light treason is nothing, because even though he knowingly met with a Russian agent to get information from the Russian Government about Hillary, he says he didn’t get any information. But that requires us to believe Junior, who lied about the meeting, lied about it being about Hillary, and lied about knowing that he was meeting with an agent of the Russian government acting on its behalf.

    But, yeah, that last part about not getting any information is surely the truth. Just ignore Trump saying a few days later that he was going to give a speech on how terrible Hillary was. Because he didn’t know anything about the meeting, according to Junior, who is all so trustworthy.

    • WIDTAP

      Aw baby! Sure, I went to her place to get laid, but when I got there, all she wanted to do was talk about adopting babies. Why you mad now? It ain’t cheating if she didn’t put out!

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      Maybe it is true, because Dump never did give that speech.

      I know, a Trump… saying a true thing?? There must be some kind of mistake.

      Maybe it’s a gambit. “Look, Mr. Mueller, I told the truth once! Right here!”

      • It is hard to take seriously from a person whose very first act as president was to send his press secretary out to lie about the size of the crowd at his inauguration.

        It is kind of amazing that they have been able to keep up with the high level of dishonesty they set for themselves from day one, but, damn it, that is the one thing Trump has put his energy into.

  • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

    It has become crystal clear that the right has no idea what the truth is, or what facts are, anymore. Party before country is the way of the conservative. “If I can’t have it, no one can.” No more trying to reason with them, or reach out to them, for me anymore.

  • Riley Whodat Venable

    Who do frat boys always blame? Why do you think the let that one black guy into the frat?

  • Panika MCD

    maybe Tsarina Short Fingers’ xenophobic friend “Jim” who used to like Paris before all the foreigns came and is now just a 400lb. guy sitting on his bed in his mom’s basement in NJ told him he’d take the meeting also too as long as there were no non-white foreigns there…?

  • Bebecca

    I then asked him a second time in a totally different way.

    He doesn’t have the vocabulary or mental skill to ask the same question in a different way.

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      “Vladimir, honest now. Did you do the hacking?”

      “NYET! NO!”

      *Trump clears throat*
      *Falsetto voice* “Vlad, did you do the hacking?”

      • Unregistered Hijabi Rockstar

        *removes sock, places over hand as impromptu puppet* “Promise Mr. Handie you didn’t do it.”

        • puredog

          That “Mr. Handie” reference is taking us perilously close to the Brain Bleach threshold.

          • amrak63

            I supplied some just above (or below, if you’re using the “Oldest First” format).

  • Cranky Man

    When Cheeto Benito says, “what I’m hearing,”. That my friends means “I’ve known about this from the day it happened” He’s a proficient liar in the sense that he believes you’ll believe him.
    But come on, are we to seriously believe they weren’t circle jerking each other in anticipation of another Benghazi type of disclosure?

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    From the link above:
    “As many of you know, I attended the University of Pennsylvania with Donald Trump Jr. I feel compelled to share this story before the election, in the hopes that it will shed a bit of light on the kind of person that Donald Trump is, and the kind of son that he raised.
    I was hanging out in a freshman dorm with some friends, next door to Donald Jr.’s room. I walked out of the room to find Donald Trump at his son’s door, there to pick him up for a baseball game. There were quite a few students standing around watching, trying to catch a glimpse of the famed real estate magnate. Don Jr. opened the door, wearing a Yankee jersey. Without saying a word, his father slapped him across the face, knocking him to the floor in front of all of his classmates. He simply said “put on a suit and meet me outside,” and closed the door.
    Donald Jr. was a drunk in college. Every memory I have of him is of him stumbling around campus falling over or passing out in public, with his arm in a sling from injuring himself while drinking. He absolutely despised his father, and hated the attention that his last name afforded him. His nickname was “Diaper Don,” because of his tendency to fall asleep drunk in other people’s beds and urinate. I always felt terrible for him.
    I am voting for Hillary Clinton for a number of reasons, her opponent notwithstanding. However, in light of what I saw that day, it is clear to me that Donald Trump lacks the temperament and basic social decency to run our country.”

    Damn, no wonder Junior is such a fuckup. Trump sounds like a horrible father.

    • C4TWOMAN

      Welp, he’s a horrible human being and it’s hard to comparmentaoze that.

      I just hope Junior is screwing up to screw dad…or turns State’s witness when the FBI come knocking on the White House bunker door.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        That would be delightful to watch Trump Jr. turn on daddy.

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    if i hadn’t seen a headline on it first, i would have guessed that “100 other contacts’ thing was a wonkettee funny.

    it is not; it really was like 100 others.

  • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

    This colluding was all Loretta Lynch’s fault!

    Exactly the same way Chris Hansen caused all that pedophilia!

    • “I’m not guilty of robbery because you forgot to lock the safe!”

      • Aiya Maston

        I’m not guilty of rape because you looked like a floozy!

        • Carla Vandermeer

          Sadly that one often works.

  • bookish

    http://www.nbcnews.com/politics/white-house/trump-open-putin-white-house-invitation-right-time-n782731?cid=public-rss_20170713&google_editors_picks=true

    WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump would invite Russian President Vladimir Putin to the White House “at the right time,” according to recently released White House excerpts of an off-the-record conversation with reporters aboard Air Force One Wednesday night.

    “I don’t think this is the right time,” the president said of the hypothetical White House invitation, “but the answer is yes, I would. Look it’s very easy for me to say absolutely, I won’t. That’s the easy thing for me to do, but that’s the stupid thing to do. Let’s be the smart people, not the stupid people.”

  • Manhattan123

    Party of Personal Responsibility, yo.

  • I see they decided to settle on the it was no big deal and anyone would have done it and it is Obama’s fault anyway spin

  • Jackie Jones
  • I’m pretty sure Don Jr.’s ignorance and stupidity is a product of genetics and environment.

    • Manhattan123

      And the look is courtesy of the Patrick Bateman line of “American Pyscho Hair Gel for Men.”

  • Ducksworthy

    Somebody came up with the idea of naming that San Andreas thingie Obama’s Fault.

  • bluicebank

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d660bea2284f2eb8db79ad74ea32bbf91a8639a0ef6fe034272b56e33ca01cf1.jpg

    If not yet posted below, Junior now gets actual Time cover, unlike daddy’s fake one:

    • It’s the milk mustache that gets me, though.

  • Pierre_de_Fermat

    David Frum:

    There’s a strain of Trump thinking in which Obama will always be the real president. Why didn’t he save Trump from colluding with Russia? https://t.co/RxEzydY7Hl— David Frum (@davidfrum) July 13, 2017

  • Duke

    When will this national nightmare be over?
    Be specific.
    Please.

    • inconvenient truth buster

      20100

    • Odd Jørgensen

      Jan 20th 2021?

      • Duke

        Too soon.

        I mean, too late.

  • Lorindel Ó Loingsigh

    Nobummer and sassy Loretta Lynch PLANTED Natasha Sveltitlova on my boy but you won’t hear that in the fake news. SAD!

  • I know the feeling of scrolling through you contacts or in this case your FB friends list and wondering, who is this person and how did they get on this list? Sure do. I guess I’m just like Le Jejune, Jared Kushner and Don Don.

  • Hello. Hello. Is this wire on?

  • unionthuggery

    Thanks, Obama!

    • Hazel Blumberg

      I know, right? It’s _always_ Obama’s fault! That guy! That Obama! He just can’t stay outta trouble, can he? Thank goodness we now have 45, who is as innocent and pure as a lamb. Amen.

  • So a “former” (No Such Thing) member of Putin’s secret police, Rinat Akhmetshin, a Russian-born lobbyist with ties to the Soviet Military directly met with the son of the future Next President of the United States to ask him to change US sanctions policy crucial to Putin.

    Gee, what’s wrong with that?

    And there may have been a sixth person at the meeting, Trump Jr’s lawyer told NBC Friday morning, but did not elaborate

    Ooooh Surprises!

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