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Morning Wonketariat! Here’s some of the things we may be talking about today. But FIRST! Minneapofriends, come see your WONKETTE FAMBLY, TONIGHT! At Bar Luchador, from 4 to 7 p.m.! Spread the word!

An NSA contractor has leaked evidence to The Intercept that details Russian attempts at spear phishing 100 election officials right before the election; it must be true because it burned its source, and Glenn Greenwald is gritting his teeth since it has nothing to do with Hillary’s murderous email-o-tron 2000.

Corey Lewandowski and David Bossie won’t start a White House war room to obstruct combat the Trump-Russia investigations presumably because they couldn’t convince anyone to sit in a room and take orders from President Bannon, David Bossie, and Corey Lewandowski while Trump barks at the teevee.

Four major law firms have passed on representing Trump because they’re afraid Trump won’t listen to a word they say. That’s not a joke, but it’s pretty damn funny!

Trump’s White House wanted to dump Russian oil sanctions even after it dumped Mike Flynn because reasons, money; also ‘Merica!

The Trump Hotel in D.C. got $270,000 from a lobbying firm that is financed by Saudi Arabia, but don’t worry, The Trump Organization and Donald Trump are totally separate entities and CERTAINLY not coordinating, or compensating one another in any way. [Archive]

All 18 Democrats on the House Oversight committee have signed on to invoke the “Seven Member Rule” for unredacted copies of the lease for the Trump hotel in D.C. in response to the Trump administrations policy of telling Democratic lawmakers to piss off with all their “rules” and “ethics” and “laws.”

The Trump Organization is going to make new discount hotels which will promote Trump’s MAGA slogan, and they’re going to be chock-full of tchotchke Americana flair, and planted in those hellish, desolate areas of middle-America where unemployed, pill-popping Trumpkins already live.

Trump is SUPER MAD at Jeff Sessions stepping out of the way so Trump has to obstruct the long, flabby arm of justice all by himself.

WaPo dug into Scott Pruitt’s claim of adding 50,000 new coal jobs and, SPOILER ALERT, it’s a big load of crap.

REXXON might be MIA, just like the rest of the State Department, but I wonder if anyone checked to see if he was hiding UNDER the bed?

There was 8th grader who refused to pose for a picture with Paul Ryan, and the poor kid took a lot of heat from butthurt “patriots,” so she wrote an op-ed that says, “I know what Paul Ryan stands for and I’m not going to take a picture with him.”

The author of the Torture Memo from the George W. Bush administration, Steven Bradbury, has been nominated for General Counsel of Transportation, so Crom only knows what kind of “enhancements” he’ll recommend.

Trump thinks it’s Democrats who are holding up everything, but if that were true Democrats would actually control Congress. [Infographic]

Nevada has a fancy new plan to give Medicaid to everybody. DID SOMEONE SAY SINGLE-PAYER HEALTHCARE!? That’s socialism!

Deep within the formerly smoke-filled rooms of Congress, Republicans are deeply concerned Trump is ruining their dreams of screwing all the poor people, and rewarding corporate malpractice.

A top-ranking US diplomat to China has quit over disagreements with the Trump administration, but the 27-year career foreign service officer was probably just throwing a partisan-fueled temper tantrum about the Paris Accord (and NATO, the EU, etc.).

Multiple diplomats in Not America are quietly expressing their frustration with Trump, but anyone who WILLINGLY goes to Not America is really more of an Ameri-can’t.

Over 130 British imams are refusing to participate in burial services for the London attackers and are joining a chorus of Muslims around the world in condemnation because they’re good people, just like everyone else.

The blacklisting of Qatar continues as regional banks freeze out the tiny Middle Eastern oil-dependent nation, and Qatar is asking Kuwait to say some nice things to all their neighbors.

Ever the optimist, Pat Roberson took to the airwaves to blame London’s terrorist attacks on hippy lefties who don’t feel like participating in a police state and actively stall the NuCrusades.

Mike Pence welcomed the Prime Minister of Montenegro in yet another attempt to look like an adult, and less like a constipated and sexually repressed religious zealot.

A Breitbart editor was fired for making racist statements about Muslims after the London attacks, and I swear I just saw a pig flying with a cow.

The Million Deplorable March in Canada drew about 100 people, according to Canadian police, but don’t you dare tell that to the Daily Caller. They SWEAR there was over 5,000 people!

The GOP is planning to go all-in on the fake-news narrative for 2018 since they don’t have any policy positions other than “Lie, cheat, steal and kill the poor.” Reporters are advised to buy body armor and bourbon.

The 2020 presidential field is full of ladies right now and they’re all busy sculpting their message. AWWW YEA!

And here’s your late night wrap-up! The Daily Show had correspondent Michelle Wolf calling bullshit on Megyn Kelly; Jimmy Kimmel noticed Putin say something about Trump; Colbert caught up with covfefe; and Seth Meyers took A Closer Look at Trump’s twitter fights.

And here’s your morning Nice Time! OTTERS!
Hey! If you like the news, the ‘splainers, and your morning Nice Times, GIVE US SOME MONEY (please)!

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  • Nounverb911
    • Chicotae didn’t drink enough coffee, tea-sipping traitor!

    • Christopher Story

      Captain Jainway was the best Starfleet captain since Picard (I’m so sorry, Takai). In my humble opinion.

  • Nounverb911
    • JCfromNC

      Janeway doesn’t get enough love on sweartrek, at least in the posts I’ve seen.

  • Nounverb911
  • Nounverb911
    • Gayer Than Thou

      Catty-corner libel!

    • Msgr_MΩment

      “Why, I otter…..”

      • FlemmishSpy

        Stop badgering.

  • Nounverb911
    • Ezio

      What’s with the first dude and that 180 degree head turn though?

      • The Wanderer

        Wants to be sure of his aim.

  • Extra-long list this morning.

    • Jeffocaster in the East

      But it can be reduced to a sentence. So-Called President Trump is a corrupto, treasonous fuck face.

    • Boscoe

      I can’t figure out how they vet this stuff to keep the lists so short!

    • Rick Hill

      I was just thinking it needs to be a two parter, maybe a trilogy

  • Boscoe

    The Caller should hire Michele Bachmann. She would’ve seen at least ONE MILLION Canadian Trump supporters…

  • Rick Hill

    “…in response to the Trump administrations policy of telling Democratic lawmakers to piss off with all their “rules” and “ethics” and “laws.””

    But trump isn’t a politician! He went to Washington to break the rules, not follow them!

    • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

      That seems to be the one thing he is actually good at.

  • Vincent Ricola

    Michelle Wolf is my spirit goddess.

  • The Wanderer

    (otter squees)

  • Ezio

    Morning rant: Why do white Libertarians have t-shirts and posters with Native Americans on them that say “So, you think you can trust the government, huh?” but those very same white Libertarians have remained mostly silent about the Dakota pipeline and in some cases have gone so far as to demonize the people protesting it? Can anyone explain this paradox?

  • Bill D. Burger

    “Yes! You’ve done so well. You’re my Big Boy.”

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DBo3JTGVYAAdxZc.jpg

  • Mpeg

    The Trump Hotel in D.C. got $270,000 from a lobbying firm that is financed by Saudi Arabia

    Great. The Trump Hotel is not only overrated, it’s also overcompensated.

    • Bill D. Burger

      Additionally, if Trump really hated “Radical Ideology” he would not have (1) cozied up to Saudi Arabia, Radical Ideology’s Bank; and (2) chosen Mike Pence

  • Mpeg

    THere ought to be a Nice Time video of Canada’s PM Trudeau romping around in the waterways pimping his kayak skills like a common Eskimo.

    • VirginiaLady

      With baby otters!

    • Bill D. Burger

      PM was going by the other day, kayaking like a pro, and stopped for a chat with these lucky folk.

      https://twitter.com/carrierobinson_/status/871755411808018437

      • Mpeg

        Thanks for linking it. I’m too lazy. ;)

      • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

        The RW noise machine Up Here (there is one – primarily the National Post and Toronto Sun) are screeching that these sorts of things are cynical bits of image-grooming, pre-arranged, manipulated, and that there’s something reprehensible about it all. Because no-one has ever said, ‘Say, Mr Politician, here’s some ordinary folk, why not stop to have a picture with them?’
        Maybe they just hate that Trudeau is genuinely likeable, because Harper was pretty much the opposite of that.

      • Where’s the secret service?

        • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

          i was JUST thinking the same thing.

  • Kiri the Unicorn

    “The Trump Organization is going to make new discount hotels which will promote Trump’s MAGA slogan, and they’re going to be chock-full of tchotchke Americana flair, and planted in those hellish, desolate areas of middle-America where unemployed, pill-popping Trumpkins already live.”

    http://www.ghostadventurescrew.com/web/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/ghost-adventures-zak-bagans-clown-motel-goldfield-high-school-002.jpg.rend_.tccom_.1280.960.jpeg

    • Bill D. Burger

      OMG! Been by the Clown Motel in Tonapah, NV many, many times over my lifetime. Very interesting little town, BTW.
      We’ve driven from Vegas up the Extraterrestrial Hwy. a number of times and sometimes we would go right by that place. Creepy fun! Fun memories.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      People who think Clowns and “a good night’s sleep” are compatible have never heard of coulrophobia. Or kid birthday party fails.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      They should have more signs, like “ask about our homemade sausage!” Or “No charge if you stay in room 248.”

    • Les Appentis De la résistance

      They have the best rates for a ménage à trois.

      • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

        ISWYDT

      • Kiri the Unicorn

        “Pets O.K.”

      • Lance Thrustwell

        “Hallo, ve are here for ze klaun orgie. Vich raum ist es?”

    • Bill D. Burger

      The “Pennywise” room is to die for.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      Oddly, all those “economy” hotel franchises will be run by Indians and Pakistanis.

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      looks like Circus CIrcus in Las Vegas.
      I went SPECIFICALLY cause it was in the Fear and Loathing movie…it was somehow not as bad but worse (no animals, more kids running around).

      It was AWFUL.

  • Geezus, that’s just too much wining before breakfast.

  • Gayer Than Thou

    If you thought TSA was bad now, wait until you get the waterboarding! On the other hand, if you have TSA Pre, you’ll at least be waterboarded before the hoi polloi.

  • Can we still use ‘Qatar’ in Scrabble?

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Only if you are playing under FIFA rules (for how much longer?)

    • Mpeg

      Ugh… Last night i watched the ep of Handmaids Tale w/ the first Scrabble game scene. They Did It All Wrong.

    • Antonin Dvorak

      Proper nouns are not allowed in Scrabble, traditionally.

    • Alexander Stallwitz

      You could always yell “Fake News” or “Sore Loser” and flip the board if anyone calls you out for using it.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    The Trump Organization is going to make new discount hotels which will promote Trump’s MAGA slogan, and they’re going to be chock-full of tchotchke Americana flair, and planted in those hellish, desolate areas of middle-America where unemployed, pill-popping Trumpkins already live.

    Make Americana Geegaws for Assholes #MAGA

    Trump Brand was always junk for people with no taste, but they tried to appear “classy” as part of that. Now, neither the Trumps nor their marks are pretending there is any class involved anymore. Feels good to stop pretending and just be themselves, I’m sure.

    • Alexander Stallwitz

      God, I hope they dont build one around where I live. I sadly live in of these areas that voted for Trumpy.

    • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

      So this was the plan all along. Make yourself loved by the tacky overweight pill-poppin’ rubes who “live” (if you can call that living) in flyover country and then bring your brand to them. What better way to do that than making them vote for you and pretend to be POTUS?

      • Lori

        I get the impression that it’s the opposite. Trump is killing the brand, because apparently bribe-offerers and kiss ups aren’t making up for all the people who now won’t go near the place, and they’re scrambling to find a way to maintain the revenue stream.

    • Erala Contratista

      There’s a Howard Johnson on the east edge of Iowa that can be the flagship property.
      New Orleans French Quarter inside an old factory type building.
      Really.

    • Lori

      I assume all the beds will have one of those “magic fingers” boxes that shake. They’ll be really tiny fingers & it will cost $5 instead of a quarter, but I’m sure the Trummpers won’t mind.

  • Oblios_Cap

    “The concerns were, ‘The guy won’t pay and he won’t listen,’”

    They seem to have a pretty good grasp of how Trump rolls, don’t they?

    • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

      Took ’em long enough.

    • Indivisible Snark Tank

      Actually, the “won’t pay” thing is easy for an attorney: just request a $50MM retainer, and don’t start till the check clears.

      As for the “won’t listen” thing….yeah, that’s the real dealbreaker.

      • SweetDeeKat

        Absolutely. Getting thrown under the bus when everything explodes is painful.

    • cmd resistor

      I remember reading that his lawyers in the past started the practice of making sure there were at least two of them in the room when they talked to Trump because he would lie about what was said later on. Totally believe it.

  • tehbaddr

    How many Russians? AOT, K! No wait mebbe just a few, but you need Vlad for sure!

  • PubOption

    Is Michael Sprinkle related to Annie? Inquiring minds need to know.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    That Glenn Greenwald, always such a champion of transparency for communications not involving Putin. Omidyar must have his nuts in quite a vise right now. No wonder he’s trying to crowdsource.

    https://twitter.com/Wilson__Valdez/status/871934596098732032

    • UnsaltedSinner

      “These aren’t the leaks you’re looking for.”

    • Covfefe’s Evil Twin

      “Don’t pay any attention to that raw intelligence, it has to be analyzed before it can be considered useful.”

      “Don’t pay any attention to that analysis, we don’t know what the raw intelligence said.”

      I think I’ve summed up the Intercept.

  • Ezio
  • OddMan

    Coal jobs?
    Mentioned this before but repeating here. From WaPo.
    six plants that relied on coal have closed or announced they will close since Trump’s victory in November, including the main plant at the Navajo Generating Station in Arizona, the largest in the West. Another 40 are projected to close

    • Finnabar87

      Durn, and I so wanted to see moron Trump attempt to squeeze his massive ass into a brand new coal mine.

      • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

        ‘You’ll have to ride in the back, Mr President.’ http://rustless.vinows.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/1450645173.jpg

        • Cheesus Crust _ Rebel

          My old company built simulators to teach people how to drive those things.

          It was kinda fun during a slow day at the office to pop in the cab of one of those monsters, load the software, and have a little demolition derby.

    • Erala Contratista

      Hurrah! The Navajo plant is fading away!!!. Now maybe some of the smog will too.
      Monument Valley, here we come again…

  • Nounverb911
    • Gayer Than Thou

      “If you were a kind of election hacking, what kind would you be?”

  • Oblios_Cap

    How Many Russians Does It Take To Rig An Election?

    42?

    • Latverian Diplomat

      98% of them…oh wait, that’s how many will “vote” for Trump in 2020. The codes already written, no need to actually go to the polls.

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Once again, the media is missing the actual story. It isn’t “Russia wanted to elect Trump.” It’s “Russia wanted to delegitimize U.S. Elections” That Trump has also managed to fuck over our international standing is just icing on the cake, but was not the endgame. By continually focusing on the idea that they were choosing candidates is one thing that is making it hard (aside just from their general awfulness) for the Republicans to do the right thing.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “We really didn’t need another Qatar government scandal. Why can’t we have “fun” scandals like Fox News.”
    — Al Jazeera

    • cmd resistor

      I don’t profess to understand the ins and outs of that whole thing. However, the fact that Trump is taking credit for it tells me it is not a good thing.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        Is this the thing the Israelis told him?

        • cmd resistor

          He was talking about how the other countries said Qatar was the terrorist problem. WHat little I read yesterday had stuff about all those countries being way against Iran, which of course would appeal to Trump.
          https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/872084870620520448
          https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/872086906804240384

          • Oh yeah, I’m sure this will be the end of terrorism. Because Qatar has all the terrorism and nobody else does even a little.

            (Qatar is a thorn in the side of many of the gulf states for many reasons, not least for supporting groups active during the Arab spring, maintaining decent relations with both iran and the Muslim brotherhood and hosting Al Jazeera.)

      • Jamoche

        AFAICT, it’s like going to the local Mafia boss and asking them to cut down a bit on the crime, please, and next thing you know all the fingers are pointing at some local nobody who, up to then, was only known for clumsy attempts to buy respectability.

        Seriously, Qatar not only has the World Cup, someone there has put in a WorldCon bid – the big science fiction convention known for the Hugo Awards. Near as anyone can tell, they think it’s a big professionally run event like ComicCon and all they have to do is invite them. It’s actually run by volunteers with experience running smaller cons.

        • cmd resistor

          Obviously a front for an ISIS conference.

  • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

    ‘Million Deplorable March’? I prefer to think that we don’t have a million deplorables in the COUNTRY, unless they were being bussed in from the US.
    And I loved how they went from ‘requesting the Commons heritage committee to study how the government could develop a government-wide approach to reducing or eliminating systemic racism and religious discrimination, including Islamophobia’ to ‘lead to the implementation of Sharia Law in Canada.’ That’s positively Trumpian. That’s Breitbart-level bullshit, that is.

  • goonemeritus

    I will not rest until the NSA contractor Reality Winner replaces Andrew Jackson on the back side of the new 20 dollar bill.

    • Historicat

      Between her name and the fact Jared’s bad tower deal was for a building with an address of 666, I’m becoming convinced we’re all in some reality simulator. A poorly programmed reality simulator.

      • goonemeritus

        It does make a compelling argument for a priori knowledge.

  • Nounverb911
    • Steve Cole

      Or announces a missile strike (perhaps these need chocolate cake?)

    • From Russia with Love

      Or at least live-Tweets the whole thing.

  • Gayer Than Thou

    I’m super thrilled that there are women who could possibly run for the Democratic nomination in 2020. Can we decide right now that none of them is perfect, that all of them have voted for something or been aligned with someone less than desirable, and that there are some policy issues on which they haven’t been strong or progressive enough and that we can live with that because the alternative is Twitler?

    • UnsaltedSinner

      No, because ladyparts. Ew.

      • Finnabar87

        Those things are just TERRIFYING.

        Some times they are quite the party, sure.
        Then other times, they bleed from their wherevers.
        And OTHER times, those lady parts produce slime covered little humans.

        They are just too iffy.

        Plus, emails.

        • Celtic_Gnome

          As Mr. Garrison put it, “I just don’t trust something that bleeds for five days and doesn’t die.”

    • Finnabar87

      Or they had S-E-X without the cover of marriage, say.

      Or like Kristen Gillibrand, says swears! Even fuck!

  • Finnabar87

    I want to be an otter.

    • Gayer Than Thou

      The good news is, you already are, if you’re a gay man who is hairy and has a slim to muscular build.

      • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

        That would be my BFF. Though he’s usually a raccoon these days.

      • Finnabar87

        I am a curvy lady in my prime. If prime means late 50s, that is.

        But dude? I swim like an otter. Does that count?

        • Gayer Than Thou

          Depends. Is “swim” a euphemism for butt sechs?

          • Finnabar87

            Usually, it means ‘makes a damn nuisance in the ocean’ which could be a butt sechs euphemism, no doubt.

          • Persistent Tennessee Rain

            Everything is a euphemism for butt sechs.

          • Toomush_Inferesistance

            Huh. Huh. You said “euphemism”…..

      • Latverian Diplomat

        Do you have to be playful, or does that come with the gay?

        Asking for a friend.

      • Lynn A Myers

        Otters are good!

    • therblig
      • Finnabar87

        Blotto, the official SUNY band of the 1980s!

        ‘We are the Now Tones. We sing top forty. We wear matching outfits; we look real sporty.

        Like a living juke box, we play the hits. In all these nightclubs that are the pits, wo, wo.’

      • Finnabar87

        Fun Fact!

        My TV SUNY friends made that video.

        • therblig

          cool!

          • Finnabar87

            The beach? Lake Champlain. Really cold day.

      • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

        ‘Help! Help! Help! Help!’

        • Finnabar87

          White stuff on my nose!

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Les Appentis De la résistance

    Advice to whistle blowing leakers: don’t trust the Intercept.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      We didn’t have a black marker handy, so when we showed it to the authorities and asked them to comment, we just asked them not to look at that line. So, it wasn’t us.
      — The Intercept

    • Celtic_Gnome

      Michael Moore just started a site called Trumpileaks for whistleblowers to blow said whistle with the best encryption software now available and anonymous email accounts.

  • calliecallie

    I need those otters on a continuing loop that I can come back to all day long. Just watching that short bit, I felt less stressed.

  • Alexander Stallwitz

    Huh, I guess you can be too racist for Brietbart. Go figure. See what happens when Bannon isnt around, the place is going downhill. I tell you what /s

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Lawyers who will defend mass murderers and pedophiles consider Trump too toxic a client to take on. Consider that for a moment.

  • Bill D. Burger

    It’s not all “Oil & Toil”….sometimes Donny goes for a walk.

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DBpGyoyXkAM2SYY.jpg

  • Shoto

    “and [The MAGA Motel Hells are] going to be chock-full of tchotchke Americana flair” and rats and cockroaches and bed bugs too, also. No extra charge!

  • Bill D. Burger
    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      Aside: Mrs. Toomush wanted to know why the alt-right used “liberal snowflake” as an insult. I said it had to do with the quaint and unusual notion liberals have that, along with being created equal, individuals are, apparently, unique, which leaves room in the universe for both alt-right idiots and a range of people they don’t approve of. Did my explanation suffice? (she said she was happy to be a snowflake)…

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        eh, my impression of it is that was based on parents whos special and unique special snowflake of a child can’t POSSIBLY follow the rules that every other kid has to follow and then it grew from there.

        I may be wrong.

  • Nounverb911
    • Oblios_Cap

      I would pay money to watch that.

    • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

      Yes, by all means. Let’s see it.

    • Saxo the Grammarian

      After which, he will challenge LeBron James to a game of horse.

      • Finnabar87

        I want a singing competition.

        Trump versus Madonna.

        • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

          Have them both sing the National Anthem. Donnie goes first so he can’t sneak the lines he doesn’t know from her.,

          • Finnabar87

            I would say Beyoncé, but she crushes him with a look.

          • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

            He would lose a National Anthem singing contest to Roseanne.

          • puredog

            He would lose to Ron Perlman.

          • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

            Ooh, snap!

    • Jim Johnson

      So Trumpy still thinks he is in the Reality TV business?

    • SeeTrain65

      And by doing so, Donny’s already lost.

    • Bec Jenn

      It is horribly sad that I did think that this was a “fake news story”, because true life couldn’t be this ridiculous. I mean who does this? (well, Trump does I guess). It’s just that every day the news gets more and more absurd and horrible.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      This Beef is getting REAL!

      • “M”

        He’s such a bully. He literally does not know when to quit.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      I imagine he would quickly claim the test was rigged.

  • Bill D. Burger

    I think we are dangerously close to every-man-for-himself time. Thursday may be the deadline….the beginning of the end.
    Even the Muchkin of Mayhem is headed for the underside of the Trump bus.

    Trump Grows Increasingly Discontented With Attorney General Jeff Sessions
    By PETER BAKER and MAGGIE HABERMANJUNE 5, 2017

    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/06/05/us/politics/trump-discontent-attorney-general-jeff-sessions.html?_r=0

    • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

      I’m not getting my hopes up. But on the other hand, I think I might buy a bottle of celebratory ice wine.

      • SweetDeeKat

        Ooh, Mr. Big Bucks! Fancy!

        • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

          Hey, I make one bottle last three years. Over three years, that doesn’t count as drinking at ALL.

          • Celtic_Gnome

            Ms. Gnome can’t make a bottle of ice wine last three hours.

          • puredog

            Hereabouts, three minutes is “sipping.”

          • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

            Does she still have a functioning pancreas?

    • Cheesus Crust _ Rebel

      Yesterday I told the much better half that we might need to take to the streets Thursday night because Comey’s testimony could be that bad.

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenResistance

    https://twitter.com/RealPressSecBot/status/872060765837996032 We love it when you tweet. So much derp.

    • Saxo the Grammarian

      Here’s your tweet machine, Donnie. Don’t listen to the lawyers; go crazy!

      • MrTusks

        Uh, the MSM loves this shit. Your lawyers, advisers, and family are the ones who want you to stop.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      Mind-boggling

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      And his spokespeople get whipsawed again! Damn, if it weren’t for the whole “ruining the country” thing it’d be funny to just watch the show.

    • Opalescent Riddles

      The “working … to get [you] not to use Social Media” is coming from INSIDE THE HOUSE, donnyboy. GET OUT NOW.

    • Claire

      “Republican or paranoid schizophrenic? Take the Buzzfeed quiz and see how many quotes you can identify!”

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg
  • mackafritz

    The only problem with that 8th graders op-ed is that it is much too intelligent. The morons who criticized her wouldn’t understand what she is saying.

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    London Mayor Sadiq Khan says England should cancel Little Babby Donnie’s planned October visit.

    “I am officially banning London mayor Mohamed Hussein Terrorist bin Laden Khan from USA.” #DeletedTrumpTweets

    “KHAAAAAANNNNNNN!!!!!” #DeletedTrumpTweets

    • cmd resistor

      I just saw a headline where some stupid R-Rep. said Khan started the fight with Trump. I couldn’t even. I think it was on CNN.

      • “M”

        Which one of those morons was responsible for that?

  • puredog

    The lawyer smackdown is even funnier than that. “The concerns were, ‘The guy won’t pay and he won’t listen.'”

  • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

    I really enjoyed reading the article about law firms telling Trump to GTFO. Favourite passage:

    The lawyers and their firms cited a variety of factors in choosing not to take on the president as a client. Some, like Brendan Sullivan, said they had upcoming trials or existing commitments that would make it impossible for them to devote the necessary time and resources to Trump’s defense.

    Others mentioned potential conflicts with clients of their firms, such as financial institutions that have already received subpoenas relating to potential money-laundering issues that are part of the investigation.

    But a consistent theme, the sources said, was the concern about whether the president would accept the advice of his lawyers and refrain from public statements and tweets that have consistently undercut his position.

    “The concerns were, ‘The guy won’t pay and he won’t listen,’” said one lawyer close to the White House who is familiar with some of the discussions between the firms and the administration, as well as deliberations within the firms themselves.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      “The guy won’t pay” being the main concern.

      • From Russia with Love

        They are lawyers, after all. Fifty million worth of pro bono work, Mr Trump? FOAD!

        • Ghenghis McCann

          Surely working for Trump is Pro Bonehead?

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        Hefty retainer and still no takers?

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      larry flynt didn’t listen – but he did pay.

      Jus’ sayin’.

  • Lyly Sirivong

    That story with the 8th graders refusing to pose with Paul Ryan gave me so much joy and hope. Bless them.

    • Finnabar87

      Young girls are forces to be reckoned with, damn it.

      Don’t ever diss a future wonder woman.

    • Cheesus Crust _ Rebel

      The otters were cute, but that story was my morning nice-time. The kids are alright! and that gives me hope for the future.

    • Manders

      And the essay was very well-written, including defenses for the kids who DID pose with Ryan (b/c they caught crap, too – stop that, lefties! They are children!). I was very impressed with the the kid.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    America First Fascist Motor Inn: In case your trip through Dumbfuckistan isn’t already hellish enough.

    • Finnabar87

      But the bedbugs? Terrifc and yuuge, believe me.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        “Goddamnit, there’s only Mountain Dew in the soda machine!”

        • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

          And the dispensers in the toilets don’t have Aspirin, just Oxycontin.

          • IdiokraticDrumpfenResistance

            “We think that’s a feature you will find in very few other motels in this area.”

    • IdiokraticDrumpfenResistance

      You can check in for free…but how much will you pay to leave?

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      We’ll leave the light on at 3 am….

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        And the faucet dripping…

        • Good_Gawd_Yall

          And every room is next to the ice machine and/or elevator.

          • Claire

            And every person who walks by your door will either be a drunk frat guy or a hard-of-hearing old dude yelling at his wife down the hall to get a move on.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            And “housecleaning” shows up at 4 a.m.

          • “M”
      • natoslug

        On the plus side, every kitchen comes with its own walk-in oven.

    • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

      Instead of ‘Welcome to the America First Fascist Motor Inn,’ the desk clerk looks at you frowningly and demands, ‘Papers, please!’

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        On a dark desert highway,
        Cool wind in my hair…

    • SeeTrain65

      “Making Motel 6 look like the Hilton.”

    • From Russia with Love

      Should be a good match at any of those religious theme parks.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        I’m assuming they already have their own monastic cells for visiting tourists to stay in, but for the more adventurous, a perfect fit!

    • SweetDeeKat

      Where the rapey vibe just adds to the ambiance.

  • Claire

    Sweet babby Jesus.

    If true, some guy put up his hand at Daesh’s weekly team-building meeting and said “Hey, let’s sent crazy-eyed Middle Eastern guys into large public spaces to buy an armload of long guns from the crazy-eyed paramilitary white supremacist infidels! If it goes one way, we get weapons. if it goes another way, we get mass slaughter. Then maybe an enormous constitutional mess falls into the laps of the Supreme Court and thus begins the New American Civil War. I tell you, my brothers, there is no way to lose.”

    I have no love for Daesh, but you have to give that guy a reluctant golf clap. He’s right, there is no bad outcome for them here.

    https://twitter.com/ChrisMurphyCT/status/871800253871214592

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      They share a certain 12th century mentality with Republicans.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      I kind of enjoy looking at Donnie’s Twitter feed occasionally, just to see how many people are mocking him. Must drive the thin-skinned shitbag nuts.

      • cmd resistor

        Certainly there are more mockers than supporters — at least it seems that way.

        • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

          And of course the mockers are vastly more intelligent and articulate.

          • cmd resistor

            I signed up for Twitter just to join the ranks of his mockers but haven’t posted anything yet. They’ve got it covered pretty well!

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        Except that he doesn’t read the comments and he only follows 45 pages. Twitter is one way for him.

        • Boscoe

          We just have to figure out how to get Fox und Freundes to report on them…

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        the US has it’s problems, but you gotta love a country where you can tweet at the President, call him a moron, and not end up in a dungeon somewhere.

        USA!

    • natoslug

      MAH CONSATUTIONAL RIGTE TOO GET TEH LED OUT SHALL NOT BE A BRIDGE!!!1!!!111!!!ELEBENTY!!!111 #pewpewpew

    • shivaskeeper

      Unfortunately ISIS has long known it’s far easier to legally buy weapons here than using any other method. That particular one has been in the game plan for several years.

      • Claire

        I don’t know about it being easier than any other method. If they invite Trump to parties and butter him up with gold medallions and weird orbs he’ll probably sell them an armory at wholesale.

        • formerChild

          Except that the whole arms deal has now been exposed as fake news.

          http://talkingpointsmemo.com/edblog/breaking-trumps-saudi-arms-deal-actually-fake

          • Claire

            I wasn’t claiming otherwise, but yes, it has.

          • formerChild

            Sorry, wasn’t dinging you. I was just putting it out there for those who hadn’t heard, since it just broke an hour or so before I posted here. Cheers!

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            oh good god. THey were touting that for the whole week and then some…signed deals! new jobs!

            Lying really is instinctual for them, isn’t it?

            Oh the plus side, less arms for Saudis?

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    Nevada has a fancy new plan to give Medicaid to everybody. DID SOMEONE SAY SINGLE-PAYER HEALTHCARE!? That’s socialism!

    We’ll see what happens, though. It’s on Sandoval’s desk, and he has 10 days to veto it or it becomes law with or without his signature. And after the GOP died on the hill that was Education Savings Accounts (all they got was some more tax credits for an existing “opportunity scholarship” program, which the Dems don’t really oppose as strongly) it’s hard to tell where the governor will land.

  • Reince Pubis

    Favorite headline of the day: Breitbart “First Deep State Arrest.” SHE’S the DEEP STATE! The Deep State cleverly took the form of a 25 year old woman taking gym selfies! To fool us! Then, during the Third Reconciliation of the Last of the Meketrex Supplicants, they will choose a new form for the Deep State, that of a giant Sloar! Many Shubs and Zulls will know what it will be to be roasted in the depths of a Sloar that day, I can tell you!

  • Carpe Vagenda
    • cmd resistor

      This guy needs to go away.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      I won’t know what to think about this until Vlad weighs in.
      Oh, wait – apparently he already has.

    • (((Aron)))

      Oh shit.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      He’s going to ship all those jobs back home. The largest US military base in the Middle East is now going to be in Texas.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      w.t.f.

    • Boscoe

      Hahaha, don’t worry, Trump has no idea what the importance of Qatar is. (Worry.)

  • Mr. Blobfish

    America is being run like a going out of business sale.

    • Claire

      I genuinely believe that’s exactly what it is at this point.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      “Come on down to Crazy Donnie’s Liquidation Supercenter! It’s YUGE!!”

      • Marsupial99

        “I’m not selling anything… I’m just CRAAAAAAZY!!!”

        • Boscoe

          States and natural resources at rock-bottom prices!! EVERYTHING MUST GO!!!

          70% off for our Russian and Chinese friends…

    • eyelashviper

      The Big Yard Sale on the WH lawn is gonna be yuuuuuuge, and Ivanka and Melania will offer jewelry and other trifles as prizes with each purchase of a hunk of Murika.

      • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

        Only the cheap stuff though. Only the cheap stuff…

  • eyelashviper

    Political cartoonists are national treasures, and they have been soooo busy:

    https://cdn.creators.com/217/205312/205312_image.jpg

  • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

    ‘He does not think rationally anymore’

    Mornin’ Joe concern trolling again. “Anymore,” Joe?

    http://www.rawstory.com/2017/06/he-does-not-think-rationally-anymore-morning-joe-worries-trumps-mental-health-is-getting-worse/?comments=disqus

    • Boscoe

      Lol Joe’s obvious attempts to distance himself from himself are obvious.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    For context: Shelly Silver was one of the most powerful men in NY politics for decades. When the federal government signed over the Coast Guard facility on Governor’s Island to NYC, they gave decision-making authority to two adjacent boroughs and the guy who held Shelly Silver’s state assembly seat.

    This guy took down Shelly Silver.

    https://twitter.com/harris1_owen/status/871927379601612800

    • Boscoe

      Ok, that is simply badass.

  • Ω cynmac will never surrender

    Ohhhh, this is getting good, y’all.
    A-list mob prosecutor joins Robert Mueller’s Russia investigation team.
    http://tinyurl.com/y82vyyxk

    • eyelashviper

      And poor lil Donnie was rejected by four major law firms, who want nothing to do with defending him…they say he not only doesn’t pay, but disregards advice…

      • Boscoe

        But his administration is running like a fine-tuned machine! A FINE TUNED MACHINE I TELLS YA!!!

      • It would be hilarious if he had to rely on a PDA. Not because PD’s don’t do a good job, but because it would be so damn humiliating for the thousandaire ^.^

      • kareemachan

        The part that cracked me up is that the firms were also concerned that they wouldn’t get quality applicants for jobs with them if they were tainted with the drumpster brand.

      • “M”

        I’m concerned about what Rachel is concerned about (if you’re watching what I’m watching ) — we want him to get the best defense he can, because we don’t want his crazed supporters screaming that he didn’t get a fair defense, am I right …?

    • andyshelt

      It looks like the Trump mob (aka The Gang That Couldn’t Shoot Straight) may need to go to the mattresses soon.

      I just hope Donnie knows a good cleaning firm if they are the same mattresses he used for the Russian pee hookers.

  • kareemachan

    O/T, but this is one great student – and not because of her actions, but because she was able to write about it in a way that totally outshines anything coming out of a trumpette’s mouth.

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-mix/wp/2017/06/06/i-know-what-paul-ryan-stands-for-8th-grader-defends-refusal-to-pose-with-house-speaker/?utm_term=.49ce607bdf1f

    • Pilotshark

      Outstanding!
      there is hope for the future with lady like this, and children who are very a where of what is going on.

  • iceweasels

    I know y’all hate The Intercept, but it doesn’t look to me like they burned their source, but that she burned herself.

  • Zyxomma

    Otters are adorable.

  • Tiny kaiju

    I’m sorry but Reality Leigh Winner sounds like an alias for someone involved in Florida real eastate scam.

  • andyshelt

    Colbert has been awesome at exposing Trump’s idiocy but with this piece he just hit a new high.

    The opening joke with the clip from Spicer denying that there was a “travel ban” followed immediately by Trump’s tweet is just brilliant.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C5rC8uAtiBc

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      glad to see Stephen still has it.

      I think everyday a reporter should ask Spicey, “So when is the president going to tell us what covfefe means?”

    • phoenix00

      “cock holster”. Low-brow yet high-minded, and still accurate.

  • andyshelt

    It looks like the fuckwit acorn doesn’t fall too far from the fuckwit tree as Donald Trump Jnr joins his shitbag father in attacking the London Mayor trying to deal with the aftermath of the terrorist atrocity.

    At least it answers the question posed by this tweet from a Professor at Essex University in response to Trump’s moronic tweet asking.
    “Do you notice we are not having a gun debate right now? That’s because they used knives and a truck!”
    https://twitter.com/StevePeers/status/871333136738770944

    http://www.politico.com/story/2017/06/06/donald-trump-jr-sadiq-khan-london-mayor-239176

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      ” Were you genetically engineered to be this stupid?”

      As likely as any other explanation.

  • Angela Ruzzo

    Pat Robertson went on TV after Hurricane Katrina and said God sent the hurricane specifically to punish all the sinners (i.e. homosexuals) in New Orleans. If so, God has pretty poor aim, because the French Quarter did not flood.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      Maybe God’s really left-handed but had teachers that forced him to do everything right-handed. That would really fuck up your aim.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        Funny you should say that. A left-handed kid in my age-6 Catechism Class asked the nun teacher if god was right-handed. She said god was ambidextrous. She really did, I’m not joking. I remember because we didn’t know what “ambidextrous” meant and someone asked her to clarify. And I sat there and thought “How do you know this, old nun?” but I didn’t ask the question. It never did any good to ask nuns that question.

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