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He sings folk songs.

Morning Wonketariat! Here’s some of the things we may be talking about today.

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  • beatbort

    Was the reporter wearing a wrestling mask? That might explain it.

  • wait! what?

    After going out for “a pack of cigarettes,” Sean will officially be the new Eddie Muntz.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/579aeb76496d7499af51c8cab304ebf208eb09714fceb2dcf1bed694ddf9c030.jpg

    • Old Man Yells at Cloud

      Wait, how did I miss that Nelson’s dad is Eddie? That means the fans of Nelson’s dad would be “Eddie Muntz-sters”.

  • baconzinlove
    • Hairstrike Alpha

      Explain this.

      • baconzinlove

        I’m “geeked”.

    • janecita

      Why are you sideways?

      • Bobathonic

        And upside down?

      • baconzinlove

        Because you put your contact lenses in the wrong eyes.

        • janecita

          No joke, I hate when that happens!

          • baconzinlove

            It sucks.

        • Mumen Rider Justice CRASH!

          Whose eyes did she put them in?

    • Oblios_Cap

      If you keep making her wear ties, you will mess things up!

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Besta luck ‘n at. I have my best vicarious adventures here at the wonket.

      • baconzinlove

        I’ll take her on the incline, to giant eagle, buy her chipped ham at parmanitii’s and get her a terrible towl.

        • Shanzgood

          That doesn’t mean I have to eat it.

          • baconzinlove

            Oh yeah. And I’m going to make you drink an Iron City 16 Oz beer out of a can.

          • Shanzgood

            Whose can?

          • baconzinlove

            (Tee-hee)

        • YoBunnyBunny

          True story: I treat a trip to Giant Eagle like a tourist destination stop every time I go to Pittsburgh. Their bakery makes some bomb ass peanut butter thumbprint cookies with chocolate icing.

        • Msgr_MΩment

          Coupla Ahrn Cities, and you’re in like Flynn.

  • Major_Major_Major

    “Dominic is ‘Yr Wonkette morning person! Forged in the fires of the public education system, and fueled by an endless supply of coffee, he spends most of his time trying not to burn anything down.”
    FUCKIN’ A!, no more lowly Wonkintern for you, sir. Nice, now back to my hiatus, and lurky-looing

  • Gayer Than Thou

    Say, you know who else has a poverty of spirit?

  • Manders

    In what world is Jason Chaffetz skilled at PR?

    • ManchuCandidate

      Only in the mind of Jason Chaffetz

    • Marceline

      He’s not actually going to do PR. He’s just going to launder Russian money.

  • ManchuCandidate

    Didn’t many a noir thriller start off with a twice convicted loser trying to make it big by using his wife’s connections to the big boss only to wind up as hamburger or poisoned to death by Polonium Tea?

    Mar-A-Largo as done by the Cohen Brothers.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      If it’s in Florida, it must be a Carl Hiaasen novel.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Wow. So musicians get paid shit wages because we have bad attitudes? I can’t wait to tell the guys in the band.

    • William
      • Gayer Than Thou

        Alice in Chains, Soundgarden, Shouting Trees, Double X Matches, Broken Pumpkins, Boombox Guy, Board of Nails, Unsafe Well, Beer Stein! What do I win?

        • janecita

          Nine Inch Nails, Radiohead, Smashing Pumpkins, Pearl Jam. I like your names way better!

          • Kiri the Unicorn

            Matchbox Twenty, Hole, Screaming Trees.

          • janecita

            Those three took me longer.

          • Oblios_Cap

            I’ve never heard of the Screaming Trees. I guess I’m not cultured.

          • janecita

            I’m sure that you have, you just don’t remember their name.

            https://youtu.be/PE5f561Y1x4

          • Oblios_Cap

            Not my favorite type of music. I’m more into The Avett Brothers these days, which is why I’m going to see them tomorrow night.

          • janecita

            I don’t like Screaming Trees either. I’ve never heard of The Avett Brothers, I’ll check them out. Have lots of fun tomorrow.

          • Courser_Resistance

            The Avett Brothers do nice music. Nothing like Screaming Trees.

          • Courser_Resistance

            I’ve heard OF them. That was the first I’ve heard of their music. Not my thing, either. I like heavy metal, but not that.

          • Kiri the Unicorn

            Or from the Pacific NW. They’re from Ellensburg, Washington.

        • William

          You win the most perplexed expression that I can muster this early.

      • Ferroequinologist Ron

        Happily, no.

        • janecita

          Hey, 90s music is the BEST!

          • William

            *sigh*. We had the Beatles and the Stones. My kids got Culture club and Duran *gag* Duran. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/140a55a406d63af835ac198478f80e1e37dd5b6285795190838e8b71dc396400.jpg

          • janecita

            That’s 80s music. We got Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Green Day, Soundgarden. We had great music!

          • William

            And less weird hair, and no shoulder pads.

          • janecita

            Some 80s bands were awesome though, like Depeche Mode and The Cure. They are still really good.

          • William

            All music is good if it lasts in your collection I think. I do admit I was never able to get into all types of music. Last weekend I sat down with my prodigal granddaughter, tuned up, put Chorify on the PC, plugged in and asked “what do you want to play?”. She told me she was getting into country music lately . I tore my shirt sleeve off and left the room sobbing. (sitting here caressing my Boz Scaggs concert tickets).

          • Courser_Resistance

            Damn. Yeah, most country is hideous to me. Don’t even get me started on Bluegrass. I simply cannot stand it after I was subjected to it all day, everyday at my first real job after college. Never again. I don’t like anything with twangy vocals or screechy fiddle music.

          • William

            At least bluegrass requires talent. In my effort to at least explore the shit I hate before I dismiss it, I bought Steve Martins album Rare Bird alert. Steve noted that everyone wants to be a Rock Star, but they don’t want to go through the effort of being a musician. I can respect that. https://youtu.be/DdDa_OPRRBg

          • janecita

            Oh no, country music is the worse!

          • William

            It’s not like I didn’t try. I really did. After a few chords, I felt like um….dirty or something. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/e3794e13767e91e305ef06d452c1d5b7dd0e5a02783d0c073b212dce35bba692.jpg

      • Chadwells

        Pearl Jam, soundgarden, Radiohead, screaming trees, Alice In Chains, hole, matchbox 20, smashing pumpkins, nine inch nails?!

        DID I DO IT?!?! YAY, I’M OLD!!!!!

        • janecita

          We are both old:-(

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Shut up. Right now!

          • Chadwells

            Age ain’t nothin’ but a number.

        • William

          That’s not actually old. Members only jackets are old.

          • Chadwells

            Something something….the only member.

        • cmd resistor

          I’m so old the only ones I knew were thru my kid.

        • Courser_Resistance

          The only one I didn’t get was Hole.

        • AWESOME

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Depends. Does Transistorhead have a limp biskit?

      • UnsaltedSinner

        I’m too old for this.

        • William

          Amen. Ultimately when it’s all over and humanity has become extinct a million years from now, Keith Richards will look around at the smoking devastation and wonder why we didn’t concentrate on the important things like music and just having fun.

    • Major_Major_Major

      Hope it doesn’t sour their attitudes.

  • Crystalclear12

    Is Fox sending Hannity to a farm so he can run, jump and be free?

  • BadKitty904

    Rob Quist feels no need to body-slam reporters.

    • Chadwells

      He just breaks out the guitar and sings them a little ditty!!

    • Old Man Yells at Cloud

      Sounds like he’s another coastal elitist tree hugger.

      • BadKitty904

        Versus the millionaire from New Jersey…

      • Courser_Resistance

        OMG! He played the guitar at a Nudist Camp! He SAW all the nekkid peoples! He must be a pervert!

        … yeah….

  • Gayer Than Thou

    I am totally going to get a premature pygmy hippo as a pet.

    • BadKitty904

      IKR?

    • Old Man Yells at Cloud

      This is ‘Merica! Get the full sized 4×4 hippo instead of some pygmy import.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      They grow up to be very cute, lovable, and safe.

      *actually, google “Jessica the hippo”…at least one of them really did*

    • kaydenpat

      They’re cute but I’d prefer them in the wild.

      • Persistent Demme

        A preemie hippo in the wild?
        What do you think would happen?

    • Kateaux

      I’d settle for one of the hippo plushies the zoo gift shop apparently sells.

  • HazooToo
    • kaydenpat

      So he may win in a landslide. Shameful.

      • HazooToo

        Hope for the best. Prepare for the worst.

      • cmd resistor

        So there’s been a lot of early voting but it’s hard to say how that has gone.

    • ltmcdies

      will say alot about Montana and none of it good

  • Randy Riddle

    Has Melania body-slammed her husband yet for trying to touch her hand?

    • Old Man Yells at Cloud

      I am sure that all physical contact is clearly specified in the prenup and she enforces them to the absolute minimum specified by terms since violating the terms would be grounds for sending her back to Pottsylvania.

    • nightmoth

      That reminds me: the right-wing spin on that hand-swatting incident is that Israel does not allow any PDA, not even hand holding between spouses, and that Melania was reminding her fond loving husband of that protocol. I was unable to google out the truth of that. Anybody know about Israel and hand holding? Legal? I’m guessing it is.

      • There are some religious restrictions on PDAs but this was state visit AND the Netanyahus were holding hands.

        • nightmoth

          Thank you. Just as I suspected.

  • coozledad

    Someone suggested that if Gianforte wins, Ryan might not seat him. How goddamn daft do you have to be to believe that? What’s one more psychotic piece of Republican shit in the House? Their voters eat that shit up, anyway.

    • BadKitty904

      Ryan will seat whoever his owners tell him to seat.

      • bupkus231

        ..and claim it’s will of the people ( never mind, he never says WHICH people )

        • Msgr_MΩment

          Pox populi.

      • Courser_Resistance

        How much to you want to bet that if Quist wins, Ryan will refuse to seat an icky liberal?

        • BadKitty904

          While I’m sure Ryan would as little respect as he feels he can get away with, I’m not sure he’d set such a precedent. Ryan’s sole goal is the 2020 GOP Presidential nomination, so he’s hedging his bets as best he can and leaving the REAL dirty work up to the GOP House of Reps.

    • OneYieldRegular

      Are you kidding? Ryan and the rest of that bunch of thugs won’t be happy until all of their members have assaulted someone.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        They’ll have to start signing a pledge-like the one about never raising taxes-that they have or soon will assault someone before they are considered a viable Republican candidate.

    • kaydenpat

      Gianforte should step down willingly but he’s not a decent human being so he won’t.

    • cmd resistor

      It was kind of amusing this morning seeing CNN people trying to get republicans to say if their party should denounce the guy.

    • ltmcdies

      please…..Ryan would seat a ham sandwich if it had R by it’s name

  • Rick Hill

    Assaulted a wimpy reporter. The reporter is already up and walking around and he only got charged a misdemeanor. How can someone so Betta be expected to govern? What a wuss.

  • BadKitty904

    OT: “…with bigotry and injustice for all…

    Betsy DeVos: If States Discriminate Against LGBTQ Students, It’s Cool by Me
    Trump’s Education Secretary apparently sees no problem with giving federal money to schools that reject queer kids.
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/betsy-devos-lgbtq-students_us_5925b7f5e4b0ec129d319c3b?ncid=inblnkushpmg00000009

  • OneYieldRegular

    Republican candidate Greg Gianforte is completely unfit for political office. What an amateur. I mean, what kind of Trump-loving politician beats up reporters himself instead of commanding other people to do it? Lame.

  • Rick Hill

    There are five differences. Can you find them all?
    https://img-9gag-fun.9cache.com/photo/ajXeX5g_700b.jpg

    • BadKitty904

      BWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!1!

    • baconzinlove

      Oh..oh..I know this one….

      • God Emperor Emeritus

        Does it rhyme with “tack”?

    • HazooToo

      1. Trump is shorter, fatter than Obama.
      2. The Obama pic is more colorful.
      3. Obama is standing closer to the Pope.
      4. Obama is a President, Trump is a sentient weeping brain blister that can’t keep his mouth shut and will kill us all.
      5. Pope is smiling in the top pic.

      • kaydenpat

        Ding. Ding. Ding. Got them all? What do you win?

        • HazooToo

          Shame and fury. Want some?

      • Oblios_Cap

        We should start using “Dumpling” & “Dumpy” when referring to the cheeto-stained bungletcunt.

        • God Emperor Emeritus

          What’s latin for “Human Trash Fire”?

    • kaydenpat

      The Pope looks so happy in that first photo and so glum in the second one. Why? Why did we do this to that nice man, America?!!

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      1 In Obama pic, both men are smiling
      2 In Obama pic, both men are really something.
      3 In Obama pic, both men have normal sized hands
      4 In Obama pic, both men got the most votes
      5 In Obama pic, both men are Christians.

    • Alan

      One contains an intelligent, thoughtful, eloquent man and the other…oh fuck it.

    • Kiri the Unicorn

      Top photo shows two world leaders.

  • snigsy

    Good morning! I love Fiona. And now I’m off to work in a good mood. Thanks Dominic.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

    This Gianforte thing: if you or I did this, we’d be sitting in jail on battery charges, not misdemeanor assault charges.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      His battery? No charge.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      In fairness, the “victim” is a liberal and the sheriff is a donor to Gianforte’s campaign.

  • Gayer Than Thou

    The weird thing about the times we live in is that I wouldn’t ordinarily think Vicente Fox is that great, or James Comey, or the FBI/CIA, or really, even, the mass media. But here we are in the time of admiring the lesser evils.

    • Finnabar87

      It’s not that they are extraordinary; it’s due to the fact that they shine in comparison to Trump trolls.

      Contrast and Compare!

    • snigsy

      “In the Time of Admiring Lesser Evils” sounds like the title of a Gabriel Garcia Marquez novel.

    • Oblios_Cap

      I believe we meddled in the Mexican election to get Fox elected.

    • Crystalclear12

      If only some people could have voted for the ” lesser evil” we wouldn’t be here.*

      * as far as I am concerned HRC was never a lesser evil.

    • goonemeritus

      I have voted enthusiastically for less evil my whole life.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Pretty soon we’ll be talking wistfully about what a great band Nickelback was.

    • Bemused Australian
  • Msgr_MΩment

    Remember the good ol’ innocent days when Montana pols only punched cattle?

  • BadKitty904

    OT: Plus his shoe was untied and the dog ate his homework…

    Jeff Sessions Reportedly Failed to List Russian Ambassador Meetings on Security Form
    An FBI official helping the AG fill it out told him he didn’t need to make the disclosure, a Justice Department spokeswoman says.
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/jeff-sessions-russian-ambassador_us_59260a4be4b0265790f4e765?section=us_politics

    • Oblios_Cap

      OOpsie! It was a dishonest mistake.

      • BadKitty904

        The Attorney General of the United States needs help in filling out legal forms?

        • Oblios_Cap

          It must be all the big words. He is from Alabama.

          • BadKitty904

            Let’s ask this mysterious, unnamed “FBI official”!

          • cmd resistor

            Same FBI official who ate everyone’s homework.

    • snark-lurker

      tRumph’s base is stupid enough to believe it, so why not play it?

  • Ghenghis McCann

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/f25fb7dcbd2a77e25ca3591c4b617c119b7bd73f9be8d4255688c178885fd16c.jpg Apparently no pee hookers could be found in Brussels, but the authorities still made an attempt to make Trump feel welcome.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    I’m really uptight about this Gianforte thing. I have no doubt, assault charges and all, this ups his cred and goober favorability on the far right. The election feels like a mandate on how far we have sunk and how low we can go. If he wins, I’ve got my answer: We’re fucking doomed.

    • We punch Nazi’s, they punch bespectacled reporters.

      You can’t explain it.

      • God Emperor Emeritus

        At least we all know who our enemies are.

      • ltmcdies

        the guy who punched the Nazi wasn’t running for public office in which answering hard questions is part of the job description

    • h4rr4r

      Most of the voting already occurred, so I don’t think it says that.

      Cabinet selections are made from seats that are safe. If we can keep safe races close, that means we can win the toss ups.

      • ltmcdies

        they also have same day registration so anyone pissed today still can go do something about it

        • nightmoth

          That’s encouraging. I’ve been worrying about what alwayspunked said: the violence just “upping G.’s cred and his goober favorability.”

    • goonemeritus

      Try to remember it’s Montana, In a normal year the Republican candidate could shot a reporter and drag his corpse from the back of his pickup and still win by 30 points.

    • I posted this upthread but NPR was saying something like 70% of the votes are already in – they have heavy early mail in.

  • Crystalclear12

    Yeah, Fiona!
    Whose a cute little hippo?

    • Who won’t at all trun into a violent killing machine

      • Crystalclear12

        We’ll love even if she does become a Republican!

        • Ferroequinologist Ron

          ISWYDT

  • folderol

    He came out of the West
    With a scowl on his face
    Spittin’ chewin’ tabaccy
    All over the place

    Slammer Greg
    Big Bad Body Slammer Greg

    He took no shit
    from reporter pests
    He put them in their place
    With a shove to the chest

    Slammer Greg
    Body-slammin’ Greg

    Now he’s facin’ backlash
    For the thing that he done
    But Slammer Greg says
    “It’s how the West was won”

    Big bad Greg
    Tall-walking, body-slammin’ Greg
    Reporter-punchin’ Greg
    Slammer Greg

  • Oblios_Cap

    Shamelessly stolen from LG&M:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Gl4yrCytXA

    Happy Towel Day!

  • Ruhe

    Disappointed to see that the Fox News story by Acuna isn’t on a page set up to take comments. Those would have been interesting.

    • Mike

      Now they can claim they didn’t receive any negative comments…

  • Oblios_Cap

    Good to see that Trump isn’t forgetting to piss off our allies whilst he’s on his foreign junket.

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    How many Republicans have blamed Gianforte’s father for his son’s lawlessness?

    • kaydenpat

      They don’t ask those kinds of questions of White attackers.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      When will the White Community Leaders condemn this behavior???!!?!?!?

  • I wonder what those weird butt-ball things are in the Fiona video, at around 1:25? Fiona is my spirit animal.

  • Mike

    Sadly, I’m willing to bet Gianforte stills wins this thing simply because cons have lost the ability to be rational….the party has become an extremist terrorist org.

    • God Emperor Emeritus

      “Lost” implies a lack of intent.

      • bupkus231

        “Lost” implies they ever really had the ability in the first place.

        As it is, I’ve come to believe “liberal Republicans” never really existed – they were chimera conjured up in the collective unconscious, byproducts of the memory hole….

        • Lori

          “Liberal Republican” is an oxymoron and always was, but I’m old enough to remember when the GOP was a political party rather than an extremist organization. It honestly wasn’t always like this. It’s possible to be a Republican politician without being a flat out horrible human being. Not right now obviously, because anyone not horrible will get thrown out of the party, but in general. We need to keep that in mind because if the GOP (or it’s follow up if the blessed day ever arrives when the modern GOP collapses) is ever going to get back to being a political party it’s adherents need an exit strategy. They can’t believe that the current way is the only way to be Republican.

          • artem1s

            the way I remember most politics pre civil rights era; it was mostly concerned with commerce. Having to deal with social issues in a bigly way did unwind a whole lotta people of both parties. If you look at who Ryan is deep down. He’s part of that pack of people who want government to be concerned with commerce and commerce only. None of this wimmenz, ghez, and children crap.

          • Lori

            Even in the early 70s, which is when I first got old enough to pay attention, things weren’t as nasty and the GOP wasn’t as dug in as it is now. When the GOP convinced the “moral majority” that they had always been against abortion it really did bad things to our national discourse.

        • artem1s

          true fact, Poppy Bush and many GOPers of that era were pro-choice as were many religious institutions pre-Roe v Wade. the current insanity of the GOP can be traced, straight line – The Southern Strategy thru Dixie-crats who could not abide having to share their world with black people. That bag of crazy cats did once belong to the Democratic Party. The social progressive parts of the Democratic Party grew out of the New Deal and labor rights movement. That was perfectly fine by both parties until the 60s when ‘those’ people and wimmenz and LGBTQs decided they should enjoy those rights too, not just white straight men. This craziness is pure tribalism. Some of us can learn to look at someone like Hillary or Barack or Ellen see themselves even if they don’t share gender or race or sexual orientation. We understand that we share something deeper.

          Some people just can’t/never get past their own skins and birth tribes.

    • canes_pugnaces

      Maybe we deserve this for believing Jesus did not ride on the backs of dinosaurs.

    • In the realm of foreign policy theorists there is a school of thought that roughly says the Republican party is one of the most dangerous and fundamentalist political organizations in the world because of self-serving and isolationist policies that purposefully stifle democracy, and alienate the world at large through militancy and fear tactics.

      • Oblios_Cap

        Elitist Academics! We will be the first to go in the coming purges.

      • Ferroequinologist Ron

        Interesting. You could replace ‘the Republican party’ with, say, ISIL, and not have to change a word.

        • I’ve read/heard rumors that there are white papers that do equate the two, but I’ve never bothered to look for them.

        • God Emperor Emeritus

          I don’t think it works out quite the same, what with ISIS not being one of the longer lived and generally respected republics currently in existence.

    • kaydenpat

      That would say a lot about Republican voters then if they’re willing to vote for a man who would physically assault the press. But they voted for a President who encouraged physical assaults so there’s that.

      • Claire

        Yeah, I’m not sure what more it would say than they already declared loud and clear by voting for Trump.

      • Actually it says more about Montana’s voting system. A lot of votes are already cast.

  • Ferroequinologist Ron

    CNN was reporting this morning that the UK will no longer share ANY intelligence with the US. If true, the world just got a lot less safe and a lot more uncertain. Because the man-baby can’t stop running his mouth.

    • Shocking!

      • From Russia with Love

        Trump is keeping us safe!

        Kinda like W did if you ignore events of 11 September 2001, and the bloodbaths that followed.

    • canes_pugnaces

      I noticed that Herr Trump is not demanding to know who the ‘leaker’ is. I wonder why?

    • kaydenpat

      Probably won’t only be the UK that stops sharing confidential info with Orange Bigot.

    • Lori

      I don’t blame them, but that’s really scary.

    • God Emperor Emeritus

      I find myself wondering if things would look any different if we truly had a Russian-agent president who was intentionally trying to break up the US-European alliance while trying to maintain enough plausible deniability to keep Cizilla happy.

      • Good_Gawd_Yall

        I think maybe they’d have chosen someone smarter. And the evildoing would be going on quietly.

      • Chadwells

        There it is!!!!

    • Chadwells

      I read it too. Sounds legit. Also completely fucked.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      An inevitable result of putting said manbaby in the Oval Office.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨
  • William
    • From Russia with Love

      That is fucking perfect!

  • kaydenpat

    Interesting how cold Ben Carson is towards poor people even though he grew up in poverty with an illiterate mother. You would think he’d have empathy given his background. But naw.

    • Oblios_Cap

      Sociopaths are like that.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Ultimately, he’s ashamed of being black, so he has to distinguish himself as different and superior, as though he’s the only black high achiever ever.

    • UnsaltedSinner

      He was lucky and made it out of poverty, so now he wants to believe that was only because he’s so great and special and hard-working. The thought that others may have worked just as hard, but remain poor because of circumstances beyond their control, is too painful for his ego.

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Bill D. Burger
  • Bill D. Burger
  • anwisok

    Petty
    [pet-ee]
    adjective, pettier, pettiest.
    1. of little or no importance or consequence.

    Why were/are we putting people in jail for A YEAR for crimes “of little or no consequence”?

    • From Russia with Love

      Duhhh, so we can build more jails!

      • God Emperor Emeritus

        How else are we supposed to have a completely racist justice system while maintaining the veneer of not codifying it?

        • From Russia with Love

          Also, think of jails as farm teams for the big leagues.

      • Ferroequinologist Ron

        ‘If you build it, they will be incarcerated.’

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenJugend
    • Villago Delenda Est

      Rafael is slime in human form.

      (Apologies to slime)

      • nightmoth

        Yeah, slime serves a useful purpose.
        ” Slime molds offer important ecological functions as significant decomposers and nutrient recyclers.”
        Rafael, not so much.

    • artem1s

      love you Al, but JRR said it better…
      https://youtu.be/DBITZw5-HWY

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    According to Ben Carson, “poverty is a state of mind,”

    Then he won’t mind giving me all his money.

    • God Emperor Emeritus

      I’m reasonably sure that there might even be something in the Bibble about that.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Ben worships the Blessed Exchequer, not Jesus.

  • Sean Hannity? The rat in a drain? Caught out on a limb? He’s gone? And he ain’t coming back?
    https://youtu.be/7BgzrfUA8lo

  • Bill D. Burger

    After the final tally comes in tonight, a reporter makes the mistake of asking Gianforte to comment:

    http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mad5gn21aW1ro8ysbo1_500.gif

  • Villago Delenda Est

    If maggot Flynn wants to save his pension, he’d better start singing like a fucking canary chorus line.

    • From Russia with Love

      The Army can still court martial his ass, in which case he could do hard time.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        How could they NOT court martial his ass at this point? I mean, jeez, what else does he have to do to dishonor the uniform?

        • From Russia with Love

          Meh, what’s a little treason among senior Army officers?

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            “Let he who has never lied about being a paid foreign agent while serving as National Security Advisor cast the first stone.”

          • From Russia with Love

            I’ll do it! As long as it’s Roger Stone!

    • Wild Cat

      Any word on his lunatic pal, Michael Leeden? Is he involved in any activity? (Beyond lunacy.)

  • elviouslyqueer

    Beauregard is in Memphis THIS MORNING! If it weren’t for the fact that I’d have to drive 20 miles and find a decent free parking space, I would absolutely drive up there and join about 150 other good folks who are up there specifically to yell at his Granny Clampett ass.

    • I hope somebody curses him in russian.

  • TheGrandWazoo2

    Gianforte concession speech: Who do I have to kill to get elected around here…cuz I’ll do it.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Some random guy walking down Fifth Avenue seems to be a popular option.

    • I think he’s going win.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

    WikiLeaks continues disinfo campaigns:

    https://twitter.com/WLTaskForce/status/867650140621950977

  • UnsaltedSinner

    That DARPA spaceplane is cool, but not quite as sexy as the Skylon.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/497e78faa3b6094c53ae7d5219688c765b274965437e1199e8af29bffe4ba712.jpg

    I can haz both?

  • Jenny

    Kapersky was the bees knees when it came to antivirus but like hell if I would use them now.

    • I’ve never used Kaspersky. They might have good coders, but there’s a number of people have always been weary of their products for obvious reasons.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Perhaps “wary” of their products?

      • Jenny

        They were the best back in the early internet days. They always caught viruses faster than McAfee and avg. Of course, it could have been their viruses! All in all they had better tools to, especially from a diagnostic perspective, to find the bad stuff.

        I got a new phone and needed a virus protector. Kaperseky was second on the list. Nope sorry. Went with Trend Micro.

    • BadKitty904

      I had no idea they were still in business.

  • elviouslyqueer

    Completely and totally OT, but apropos of the post about Karl “I am not a lyncher but I play one in Jackson” Oliver (KKK-MS), Larrison Campbell from Mississippi Today basically says the exact. same. things. I said about calling complete bullshit on Oliver’s “When I said ‘lynched,’ I didn’t really mean lynched even though I totally did because shut up Mississippi is why” notpology. It’s absolutely worth the read. https://mississippitoday.org/2017/05/24/rep-karl-olivers-winona-divided-long-before-he-proposed-lynching/

  • Ferroequinologist Ron

    My glass is cut, my tiller manual is in, I’m not gonna let the grey wetness and depressing news get to me today! Nope nope nope!

    • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

      Stay strong and, whatever you do, do NOT watch the news.

  • Oblios_Cap
  • MississippiLefty

    I would like to write to my congress member about the CBO report and tell him how many people in our district will lose coverage. I don’t know how to go about figuring that out. Does anyone know how to math good?

    • God Emperor Emeritus

      Rough guess? Try to determine what proportion of the district lives in a household with income below, say, $150,000 and then just assume they’re all fucked?

    • Shibusa
    • Anna Rompage

      Figure out how many people have chronic health conditions in your area, and how many people qualify for Medicaid under the ACA and if you live in a Red State, assume most of these folks will likely either lose their coverage, or be woefully under insured…

    • elviouslyqueer

      Honey, if you’re from Mississippi, the best bet is to assume AOT,K.

    • BigCSouthside

      Without a good amount of in depth data (%with certain household incomes, %with non employer insurance+% on medicaid, %of eligible Medicare recipients, %with pre existing etc) it would be hard to make a projection.

      Take national numbers: # population insured/total population. Then
      Result times your district population. This is your “current state”

      Take 23 million/# national pop insured, then
      Result times your “current state”

      Result should be a loose approximation of future state loss of insurance

      This operates with A TON of assumptions and likely logical flaws (like assuming your district is Congruent to national demographics) but it should give you an idea.

    • Our local indivisible groups always seem to have good data.

  • NotReallyHere

    This tidbit was in my local paper, The Spokesman-Review.

    The Sheriff’s office said Gianforte has until June 7 to appear in court on the charge.
    Federal records show the sheriff donated $250 to Gianforte’s congressional campaign in March. In his statement, Gootkin confirmed the donation but said, “This contribution has nothing to do with our investigation, which is now complete.”

    That was a pretty quick investigation if they completed it overnight.

    • God Emperor Emeritus

      A dozen witnesses and a recording might have something to do with it.

      • NotReallyHere

        That’s a good point.

      • cmd resistor

        In addition to how disturbing it is that he just grabbed the guy by the neck and threw him to the ground, the statement his office put out was pretty untrue and stupid.

    • SnarkON

      I dunno. Not necessarily sticking up for the sheriff (who really should not be donating to any candidate IMHO), but as I understand it here in NYC the victim has to have physical signs like bruises or cuts for there to be a felony assault charge. I know this because one time a crazy man came up to me on the street and randomly head-butted me; the cops were sympathetic but said there wasn’t much they could do because I wasn’t swollen, bruised or bleeding.

      • From Russia with Love

        He broke the reporter’s glasses.

        • SnarkON

          I literally think the evidence has to be cuts, bruises, broken bones, etc. Again not sure, but I think that’s the litmus test. Broken glasses seem like they’d fall under the category of property damage.

          In any case, here’s hoping the reporter sues the shit out of Gianforte.

          • From Russia with Love

            If they are on your face when they get broken, it usually fucks you up a bit at least.

      • Sophia

        Reports are that he was taken to the hospital so there might be some damage other than his glasses

        • cmd resistor

          He was interviewed on CNN this morning. Some injury to his elbow; he had an x-ray but not broken but he is having to keep it elevated.

          • SnarkON

            #lawsuit

      • cmd resistor

        Someone posted the Montana statute. I believe it was aggravated assault, and required life threatening injuries, or stuff like a coma. I wonder if there is a plain old battery statute, though. Or a felony assault that is not aggravated. We have an aggravated battery statute in Fla., which I believe requires great bodily harm, permanent disability, or permanent disfigurement, or use of a deadly weapon. I don’t know the definition of the assault they charged the MT guy with, though.

        • puredog

          It’s almost certainly a misdemeanor, sounds like. (Unless it’s a hate crime, which it probably isn’t, except it also kinda is.)

        • UncleTravelingMatt

          Montana calls any offense leading to bodily injury “assault.” There are only the two options — Assault (no “serious bodily harm”) and Aggravated Assault (requiring “serious bodily harm”.) “Serious bodily harm” is defined, basically (and surprisingly rigidly,) as injuries likely to lead to death, permanent disfigurement, or organ failure.

          • cmd resistor

            I’d be ok with him just dealing with a misdemeanor IF he also loses the election.

    • Rick Hill

      Whitewashing doesn’t take quite as much time as most people suppose it does.

  • SnarkON

    I want an adorable baby hippo.

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenJugend
  • Edith Prickly

    BYE SEAN! Don’t come back now, y’hear?

  • From Russia with Love

    Happy Christi Himmelfahrt.

    Which would be my porn name if I was a girl and if I porned.

    • SnarkON

      Himmelfahrt jokes

      • From Russia with Love

        No, I’m serious.

  • nightmoth

    That body slam made this household send more dollars to the Rob Quist campaign site last night.

  • Bozilingus
    • artem1s

      Stephen has a wonderful voice and now we have the perfect theme song for this fucked up year.

  • BrendaKay

    OT: I just learned it’s #Towel Day so here’s a good Douglas Adams quote.
    “Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.”
    ~Douglas Adams, “Last Chance to See”

    • Any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through, and still know where his towel is, is clearly a man to be reckoned with.

      • WotsAllThisThen

        He was one hoopy frood.

        • Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable, let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all.

    • Me not sure

      Just a reminder. Friday, June 2nd is National Doughnut Day. Yay!

    • jesterpunk

      I have this quote as my email signature.

      “This planet has – or rather had – a problem, which was this: most
      of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much of the time.
      Many solutions were suggested for this problem, but most of these were
      largely concerned with the movement of small green pieces of paper,
      which was odd because on the whole it wasn’t the small green pieces of
      paper that were unhappy.”

      • TakingAmes

        You work at a bank, don’t you?

        • jesterpunk

          No I work in IT support.

    • artem1s

      “There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly
      what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear
      and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.”

      Just replace Universe for and insert GOP or Twittler administration. pretty much describes the world since 11/9

  • SnarkON

    OK fun fact: Gianforte is Italian for “strong John.”

  • Me not sure
  • Carpe Vagenda
    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Like I said last night her giraffe neck and head really look like the underside of a penis.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Actually, if you view them from below, everyone’s neck and chin looks like a penis, so it’s probably not an indicator of virtue one way or the other.

        • Everrett Fanuelli

          You’re no fun!

          • Carpe Vagenda

            begs the question how I know what the underside of a penis looks like.

          • From Russia with Love

            I assume you are very short?

          • Carpe Vagenda

            I could know naked men on stilts.

      • BigCSouthside

        Did she get neck extensions or something. It’s always looked a bit…disproportional

        • cmd resistor

          Is that a thing?

          • BigCSouthside

            Fuck I dunno, you can get calf implants so I assumed so

      • PubOption

        Tiffany looks like she has had her neck narrowed here, is it some odd plastic surgery Donald requires of all women associated with him?
        http://static4.businessinsider.com/image/56c38b248a4565dd1a982602/donald-trumps-22-year-old-daughter-just-walked-the-runway-at-new-york-fashion-week.jpg

        • Dinz6315

          Terrible, terrible photograph of her. Looks like a gopher will two recent shiners.

    • Lori

      She really needs to cut this shit out. It doesn’t suit her.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      I bet she gave them inspiring advice like, “Work smarter not harder” and “Don’t be a sex slave to your schedule.”

      • House0fTheBlueLights

        Coffee Spewed on the Keyboard Award

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      “I too, have been sexually abused since childhood…”

      • Carpe Vagenda

        You know, I’m running out of too soons for these people.

  • eyelashviper

    The official photo from Trump/Pope extravaganza:

    http://www.suprmchaos.com/lumpy_pope_goup-shot_052517.jpg

    • YoBunnyBunny

      Meh… Dump looks like he’s thinking “I just cut a silent one next to the Pope. WINNING. BIGLY!

    • Lori

      Donald is not that self-aware.

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    So apparently Spicy is furious he didn’t get to meet the Pope. Methinks someone suffers from battered spouse syndrome. I would, no doubt, not be surprised if Trump sent Spicy back specifically because he wanted to be a dick and not let Spicy meet the Pope. Trump is that kind of sadist.

    • Me not sure

      He did let Spicey have an extra scoop of ice cream for dinner, though. So, all better now.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      That’s easy to fix. Just tell Spicey he had the biggest audience with the Pope in history. Period.

      • From Russia with Love

        Well with all his concubines and progeny in there, it wasn’t the smallest…

    • BigCSouthside

      If I was Spicer I would TORCH trump at my next presser

      • cmd resistor

        They aren’t even letting him do them these days.

      • Lori

        What he needs to do is buy a burner phone and give Mueller a call.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      The Trumps are definitely a family which supports every argument about negative outcomes based on nature, nurture, and their own beloved eugenics it would ever occur to anyone to make.

    • Marceline

      I couldn’t care less about Spicer. When you climb in bed with the devil, you can’t be surprised when he fucks you.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I don’t care about Spicer, but he’s a pretty pathetic figure at this point. After all the fire he’s (rightfully, of course) taken for this POTUS, for him not to even be allowed to meet the Pope while the Vatican ambassador for his administration earned her spot through government-sponsored extramarital fellatio has to sting.

        • cmd resistor

          Yeah, the idea that Trump did it on purpose to be an asshole makes it worse. Wish he would quit and leak a bunch of shit. And it’s not like Romney, who at least had a history of publicly saying that Trump was horrid.

      • artem1s
    • artem1s

      really Spicey, meeting New Pope is not going to wash away the Trumpstench or the blood on your hands. Go get a new jerb and try to find what is left of your soul first and then maybe a couple of decades in some sort of monastic lifestyle serving the poor a la Mother Therese and then maybe, you might find meeting a Pope an enlightening experience. But hey, if you are really hard up, I’m sure Pope Ratzie Nazi will throw some sewer water on you if you grease his palm nicely. Maybe throw him a new pair of designer shoes? he might actually mutter a few sentences interceding on your behalf with his real boss, the Vatican Bank.

    • Ivanka is more religious.

      Duh.

    • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

      He really is. I don’t understand why people refuse to see that Trump is a brutal, nasty, coarse thug, surrounding himself with equally horrendous thugs. Decent people failing to grasp the true extent of a barbarian’s savagery is exactly why people like Hitler, and Trump, come to power. Trump is a terrible,cruel human being. The media has to stop enabling him or treating him as though he’s somehow reasonable. We must do everything we can to get this pestilence stopped.

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenJugend
  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    In breaking news – Trump slashes budget for zoos, all premature baby hippos are expendable, because they’re sad, weak, pathetic, losers.

    • An Outhouse for the Resistance

      Don’t show up early. If you don’t follow the rules, you brought it on yourself.

  • artem1s

    Even the Fox crew states Gianforte “punched” Jacobs, and they would know because they were there!

    Evidently the national Fox Crew did their usual ‘nothing to see here’. But if the local affiliates decide they want to save themselves some dignity and pieces of their souls, I say yea! You have decent local business and listeners who will want to advertise with you if you decide not to be amoral, greedy, misogynistic, paranoid dickheads. Go for it. Ailes is dead, remake the company from the ground up! After all you are responsible for the wonderfulness that is The Simpsons. There is some good there if you choose to let it out!

    • Carpe Vagenda

      sadly, the wonderfulness that is the Simpsons paid for Fox News.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        Sadly, you are correct. Fox News was nothing before The Simpsons.

        • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

          Not really. Fox News is the bastard spawn of Murdoch’s similar shitty, propagandizing, country-ruining media kingdom in the UK.
          It’s a division of the parent company. The entertainment division is an entirely separate division. One doesn’t pay for the other. The program that put Fox TV on the map and set the tone for the network, I’m sorry to say, was “Married With Children.” The Simpsons started as an interstitial on the Tracy Ullman show, then became its own show and is kind of a law unto itself. The TV division is run as its own entity. (Similarly, FX, another division of the TV arm, brought us Breaking Bad.)

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            I’m familiar with Ole Rupert’s country destroying English papers, including his hacking of a dead girl’s phone. Did you know there is a James Bond villain based on Rupert? I forget the movie, but it’s definitely based on him. The World is Not Enough, maybe?

            The Simpsons was one of the most profitable TV shows of all time, so it definitely put some silver in his pocket.

            I wish they’d go back to letting people own ONE news property in an area. Murdoch has WAY too much power over our American idiots.

          • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

            That’s certainly true.

      • Kateaux

        Remember the time when Fox News was going to sue the Simpsons for copyright infringement (something to do with a parody of the Fox news screen crawl)? It was back in, oh, sometime in the early oughts.

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Point of order: I think you misread the 23million thing. Here’s the quote from the article:

    Health-care legislation adopted by House Republicans earlier this month
    would leave 23 million more Americans uninsured by 2026 than under
    current law, the Congressional Budget Office projected Wednesday — only a million fewer than the estimate for the House’s previous bill.

    So that’s not the prior 24M PLUS 23M. It’s actually 1M fewer than the previous score. But this is a blunt instrument count. What it does it adds young, healthy people at the low end of premiums, and knocks off the people who actually need to use health insurance.

  • Brad H

    Is anyone listening to this shite?!? Shitgibbon is going on and on about how NATO members are not paying their fair share and how unfair it is to the U.S. at the dedication of the NATO 9/11 Memorial dedication. The one where NATO declared Article 5 to support the U.S. and reafirm their alliance. Jumped up Jesus on a pogo stick.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Taking one for the team, are you? Thank you for your service. (I won’t listen to Trump with a ten-foot Slovenian pole.

    • Alexander Stallwitz

      Again!?! Deadbeat Donnie is whining about NATO not playing bills? Oh lord, I wish trumpy would STFU already

    • Yeah :(

      • Brad H

        I think I’m gonna swear off watching the news in the morning. Not so good for my blood pressure!

    • Bemused Australian

      So, as expected then.

    • An Outhouse for the Resistance

      There isn’t a NATO budget. If he doesn’t appreciate other countries contributions to their own defense, we could reduce our defense spending from 4% to 2% of GDP.

    • Shoto

      Vlad has Orange Donnie by the nuts.

    • So this is why rexxon was so guarded about the speech last night.

    • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

      He’s literally just doing Vlado’s dirty work. He’s such a grotesque imbecile. At some point he might want to try and remember WHERE OUR FUCKING MILITARY BASES ARE and WHY WE NEED THEM TO BE THERE. But he probably thinks those fighter jets fly back and forth from New York every day.

  • Thurman Munster IV

    Why can’t we just call it Trumpdont’tcare?

  • Let’s not forget the beautiful human beings who made Fiona’s journey possible. ♡♡

    Sigh….what I wouldn’t give to touch a baby hippo……

  • David Chaillou

    Literally tens of millions of Americans suffer from depression or other mental issues in any given year. But as noted neurosurgeon Ben Carson will tell you, it’s just a matter of choosing the right mindset.

    • Carson is the living definition of somnabulence.

    • C4TWOMAN

      Those losers chose to be depressed. Winners are born with the right circumstances/genetics they never have this problem. /snark

      • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

        I know. It’s just like those babies that are born with physical deformities. They CHOSE to be born that way. See? Now we don’t have to feel bad for them, let alone do anything about it.

        • C4TWOMAN

          It’s all the babies man! Those babies are keeping us down! Whining and crying at all hours! Sucking up our bank accounts! Making us look bad in church! We’ve gotta throw the oppressive yolk of the babies off and show them whose in charge!

          /actual philosophy in wingnut book called something like “Beating your Children with Love”

          ^ not actual title, but basically the same concept.

  • C4TWOMAN

    “where Theresa May can give Trump a good lashing thrashing.”

    FTFY

  • BearGHAZI

    I bet that baby hippo will grow into a monster

  • Shibusa

    From NYT: Greg Gianforte, who publicly opposes Social Security because “Noah from the Bible was 600 when he built the ark” also thinks it’s okay to lie about physically assaulting somebody. Kevin

    • Bitter Scribe

      Boy, for something that never existed, that ark sure is giving wingnuts a lot of mileage. First Ben Carson (“The ark was built by amateurs, the Titanic was built by professionals”), now this guy.

      Maybe we should decriminalize human-animal sexual relations, because after all, the Greek gods would sometimes turn themselves into bulls, swans, etc. to have sex with women.

      • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

        The most appalling thing to me is always that it’s actually the story of an horrifyingly cruel, vengeful, mercurial, irrational, hateful being, capriciously murdering EVERYONE ON EARTH and their little dogs too, drowning them because he’s mad at them, except for one random man and his family and a tiny percentage of the animals. How vengeful and hateful would you have to be to WANT to take it literally, and then want to WORSHIP that kind of being?

        • Lori

          And it’s considered a story for children. Because it involves animals. Oy.

          • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

            I’m a screenwriter and I’ve repeatedly been asked by this studio or that to work on an animated version of the story and I repeatedly say no, because IT’S REALLY A HORRIBLE STORY! What about all the animals that are left to drown??!! They never think it through.

          • Lori

            And all those baby nurseries decorated with a Noah’s Ark theme. Sleep tight little punkin. Dream of genocide and mass animal death.

            W.T.F?

        • Bitter Scribe

          To be fair, Noah wasn’t exactly a “random man.” God saved him and his family because Noah kissed His ass enough, which was apparently the one and only way to win God’s favor. For a Supreme Being, He’s really insecure.

          (Sound like any presidents we know?)

  • cats530

    I sure hope Quist wins, but knowing what I know about these tea pottiot types, I wouldn’t doubt that they’ll vote for Gianforte in even greater numbers. Like Serratia (orange-pink shower bacterial slime) feeds off of soap scum and fecal material, these tea party types feed off of stupidity and thuggery.

  • bookish

    Fiona. What an adorable babby. Thanks for the update.

    • sgt. jmk of the résistance

      Babby Fiona is the best hippo ever.

  • Khavrinen

    “James Comey was apparently duped by Russian bullshit during the campaign when he believed a fake email that said Loretta Lynch would quash the investigation into Hillary Clinton’s email server.”

    Good thing he released that letter that helped get tRump elected, so he wouldn’t have to deal with an administration that would try to interfere in the FBI’s investigations.

    Wait…

  • Claire

    “This is not the behavior of a man. It is the behavior of a man-child. Donald Trump surrounds himself with fellow man-children who behave in a similar manner. And a great many American voters eat it up.

    Why? Well, one reason is that many men in America right now have little to offer women. They do not live up to either to the old, chauvinistic standards for adult men or the new, egalitarian ones. They want what Trump has — the women, the money, the brass-plated apartment — without having to do better or be better to get it.”

    Damn, Business Insider. Shots fired.

    http://www.businessinsider.com/gianforte-body-slam-republicans-montana-vote-2017-5

    • They are right though. All of this, blame the others, scape goat those browns, hate the libtards, etc etc etc is because they want what they think is owed to them without actually having to ….do anything about it.
      Someone fix it for me, thanks.
      Which is hilarious because that is precisely what they accuse the left of doing XD

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Dayum, That was cold, ice cold. But oh, so true. #popcorn

  • kindness

    Back when my home computer was a PC I used Kapersky. It didn’t lock up CPU time like Norton & McCafee does. The dirty lib that I am, of course I switched to a Mac 10 years ago. I’ve been so happy with my home computers ever since.

    • I know i may be required to turn in my progressive card when i say this, but apple annoys the crap out of me. I have 3 apple devices and mr fuflans has a MacBook, but i am happiest with my 7 year old lenovo which is heavier than a brick and covered in 7 years worth of wine and dorito dust.

      • zerosumgame0005

        true story, back in 74 or so I had been an electronics geek for years and I went shopping for my first mass produced (as opposed to home built) computer. At the time the only one available were the Apple 1 and the TRS-80. I went into a store that sold Apples and talked to the salesdrone about it, he turned it on and showed me what it could do. But as soon as I asked to see it’s insides it all changed. He told me Apple did not think I was smart enough to comprehend all that mean old circuitry because I was too stupid.

        I went to a Radio Shack and did the same and asked the same question and they sold me a book for $3.95 that had complete circuit diagrams and suggestions for upgrades (mostly bought from RS, so smart!) with exploded diagrams for disassembly and a parts list to replace anything inside. He also showed me the book that came with it to teach people BASIC and many other extras that came with it. hell it even came with a monitor, with Apple you had to hook it to a TV.

        Guess which one I went with and which one I have never bought shit from? I even refuse to install iTunes because it slows and corrupts PC’s. That Bonjour service is the pits. and it “checks for updates” constantly and plays like shit.

        • Ω cynmac will never surrender

          I only use iTunes to store and organize my mp3, 90% of which are burned from my CD collection. Then I move those playlists to other devices to play them.

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        The last PC I had was a Dell netbook I bought to test software being created for a Department of Ed project in 2011. It borked twice and had to be rebuilt. I did it once and then when it borked again right as I was walking away from the project, I never bothered to spend the time. The computer and the discs are sitting on a shelf, in case I get another project dealing with obsolete systems.
        And yes, the project was so fucked up that I walked away. Quit. Said Fuxitall.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Switched to Mac in 2004. I still have my original tower and I use it as a file server. The Macbook Pro that I bought in 2007 was a workhorse but the video went out. The Macbook Air that I bought as a replacement is so light and has many more bells and whistles. I bought a 13-inch, rather than the 15-inch I had previously and it slips into all my satchels, no problem.

    • phoenix00

      Kaspersky, Bitdefender, and NOD32 are the only AVs I’m actually willing to spend $$ on.

  • Shibusa
    • lunar62

      Looks like Macron heard about Trump’s alpha male handshake and did a preemptive strike. We should be at war with France within 60 days.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      I just came to post this. Here’s a link to Buzzfeed’s round up of all the fucked up handshakes that have happened on this tour.
      https://www.buzzfeed.com/juliareinstein/le-shook?utm_term=.kxM4Za3g7#.kh4my5nwz

      • Lamashtar

        Oh god the Tajikistan! LOL

  • Lucas Foxx
  • Yr. Gma

    If I live through all this shit, Fiona will be the one to thank.

  • Ω cynmac will never surrender

    YAY! I got my AMTRAK tickets to go to DC for the March for Truth next weekend. Because I am disabled, I was able to upgrade to Business class, at the same price as Coach. And because I’ve ridden AMTRAK so much, one way was payable with points collected. I am able to go round trip for $169!
    I also signed up to volunteer, since I am arriving Friday morning.
    I’z Excite!

    • BadKitty904

      Good on you. WHOOP ASS!!1!

      And, on behalf of America, thank you. :0)

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