He is still relevant shut up.

Remember how during the 2016 campaign, Chris Christie was a very important part of Donald Trump’s harem, even though he wasn’t allowed to eat all the Oreos, which was very sad because eating all the snacks is his favorite? Then after the election, Christie led the Trump transition team for a hot minute, until Jared Kushner was like “PEW PEW STAY PUFT! You put my criminal daddy in jail, I am going to Ghostbusters you PEW PEW PEW!”

After Christie had done SO MUCH for Trump, he got NOTHIN’. No VP slot, no cabinet position, just a one-way ticket back to Jersey. Meanwhile, know who DID get a job? It was that Russo-Turkish foreign agent guy Michael Flynn, who is currently pleading the Fifth and refusing to turn documents over to the Senate Intelligence Committee, in part because he is worried about the “escalating public frenzy” around the Trump-Russia investigation, and also probably because he is guilty as fuck.

Chris Christie wouldn’t have given that dude a job. Chris Christie is a good boy who should have been treated better than having to pick up Mickey D’s for the Trump campaign, and he has way better judgment than to hire a Russo-Turkish foreign agent creep like Flynn:

“If I were president-elect of the United States, I wouldn’t let General Flynn in the White House, let alone give him a job,” Christie said during a during a wide-ranging news conference in Trenton, N.J.

Christie, who was relieved of his duties overseeing the transition shortly after the November election, declined to detail his concerns about Flynn.

“I’m not going to get into specifics,” Christie said. “Some of it involves classified information that I’m just not at liberty to discuss.”

Christie said that Flynn was “not my cup of tea” and that the two “didn’t see eye-to-eye.”

“I didn’t think that he was someone who would bring benefit to the president or to the administration,” Christie said. “And I made that very clear to candidate Trump, and I made it very clear to President-elect Trump. That was my opinion, my view.”

Now, Christie specifically said he didn’t know Flynn or anybody else was under investigation at the time (probably trying to protect his ass), so we can’t point this out as YET MORE EVIDENCE that Mike Pence, who snatched the leadership of the Trump transition team from Christie’s maw like a Big Mac, is lying about what he knew about Michael Flynn and when he knew it.

But since Christie says he knows “classified information” about why Michael Flynn shouldn’t have been working in the White House, he musta known SOMETHING at the time, which suggests that Trump also knew, so that kind of debunks the SHOCK AND AWE Trump feigned when news came out that Flynn, the “best people” he had chosen as his first national security adviser, was a literal actual fucking foreign agent.

Anyway, the Washington Post reports that Trump recently chose Christie to head some White House thingie on drug addiction, and that he’s a possible contender to replace one of the very bad current members of the White House staff, but now he’s done this interview and said mean things about Michael Flynn, whom Trump still loves VERY MUCH, so he probably shouldn’t start measuring West Wing offices to see how many snack machines will fit just yet.

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  • Gayer Than Thou

    So if Trump and Pence both get impeached and tossed out, that leaves us at Paul Ryan, right? Who’s after him? How many people have to get impeached and tossed out before we get to, say, Comrade Warrenova?

  • exinkwretch

    Will Double C Quadruple XL ever run for office again? He’ll close that bridge when he comes to it.

  • Scooby

    I guess Flynn was a Bridge too Far for him.

    • Spurning Beer

      Or a Fridge Too Far.

      • Scooby

        No Fridge to Far.
        -NJ Boy Scout motto

        • Toomush_Inferesistance

          to Terrablimpia….

    • President in Exile Firefly

      No suspension of disbelief there.

  • Michael Smith

    Now Christie will be a traitor to Fox News and Trump. Put him in with McCain and Lindsey, and all the other RINOs who want to sell America and OUR PRESIDENT out to the special interests and the liberal snowflakes.

    • Lascauxcaveman

      Hmmm, needs more semi-coherent bluster, more all caps. I rate it 6/10.

  • Blackest Noobs

    isn’t it funny that Christie is basically the example for everyone who fell for Trump’s BULLSHIT:

    Fat, Stupid, White, and thought he was gonna get a bone from Trump.

    He got NADA….NOTHING for his troubles just like the fat dumb white americans who voted for Trump.

    • Ricky Gay

      Yup! The New Christie Minstrels

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        Ohhhhhh, that’s digging deep….

        • Ricky Gay

          Sorry, 2 cups of Sanka this morning.

    • Electric Ukulele Land

      To be fair, I don’t think Christie really fell for the BS. I think he was just being opportunistic because he saw now path forward for himself so it latched himself to Donald Trump’s fortunes.

      Effectively, though, it amounted to the same thing.

  • I imagine Christie feels like he dodged a bullet after finding out he would have only gotten one scoop of ice cream working for Trump.

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    He’s begging to get out of Jersey because he finally realized no one there likes him.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    OT: Why do the congresscritters keep thanking Mr. Brennan for his cervix?

  • Michael Smith

    Remember when Christie was the hot new Republican on the block? That was funny.

    • BearGHAZI

      They begged him to run in 2012. Begged. Like dogs.

      • Michael Smith

        Haha Batman Begins?

  • ManchuCandidate


  • armed_bears

    Former CIA director John Brennan said Tuesday that he personally warned the head of Russia’s intelligence service last year that Moscow’s interference in the U.S. election would backfire and cause severe damage to the country’s relationship with the United States.

    • armed_bears

      But her emails!

    • CogitoErgoBibo

      FOX News: “Obama CIA Director Admits Contact with Russian Officials.”

    • Msgr_MΩment

      I wonder about the mechanics of how he contacted him. I mean it wasn’t like it is now, where you just whisper into the curtains.

      • armed_bears

        “I was aware of intelligence and information about contacts between Russian officials and U.S. persons that raised concerns in my mind,” Brennan said. He emphasized that the information he saw did not amount to proof of collusion or cooperation between Trump associates and Russia, but said that it “served as the basis for the FBI investigation.”

      • armed_bears

        Or, basically, tell them during a “take your Russian to work day” visit.

      • Querolous

        He talked to the microwave?

  • schmannity

    Chris Christie wouldn’t have hired Flynn, but he hired all of those bridge closing conspirators whose actions he knew nothing of? Riiiiiight.

  • Oblios_Cap

    The only way Christie will be able to support himself after he leaves the Jersey governor gig is to cash in on the sweet, sweet wingnut welfare. He better watch his step, calling his Rumpness’ judgment into question.

    • Mumen Rider Justice CRASH!

      So he won’t be pitching for the Yankees?

    • C4TWOMAN

      If he waits a bit until Trump’s star has fallen and the wingnutosphere has decided Trump was a NWO Jewish mole agent all long, Christie will be fine.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      I’m thinking Dancing with the Stars.

      • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

        Oh, yes, please. That would be hilarious.

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        I do think his shot at becoming a Major League baseball player has come and gone….

        • Msgr_MΩment

          …with the demise of the Designated Quitter Rule.

    • schmannity

      “supporting himself” may involve leaf springs and 12×12 timbers.

  • memzilla Ω

    …Christie says he knows “classified information” about… Michael Flynn…

    And just how exactly would somebody come by that information? Why would somebody without a security clearance not IMMEDIATELY contact the FBI and say “Somebody just shared classified intelligence with me that I’m not cleared for?”

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      He was head of the transition for a good part of the campaign and just after the election, so he would probably have some level of security clearance.

    • Meccalopolis

      Remember the transition team leaving Intel brief docs all over the place?

    • MrTusks

      Please, that’s the “Teacher, you forgot to assign us homework!” of bullshit Washington politics.

  • SayItWithWookies

    Christie has such integrity – though only in hindsight, after he’s been sidelined. Just like that wise fox who could tell the grapes were sour because he couldn’t reach them.

  • Pickles

    if christie doesn’t like flynn he must be really terrible and guilty.

    • Stulexington

      Or didn’t share any of those sweet foreign secrets.

      • redarmyzombie

        Or the Turkish Delight.

  • Michael R

    ” My penis is huge … right Chris ? ”

  • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

    A one-way ticket to New Jersey. That’s harsh, bro.

  • schmannity

    Since Jared Kushner is the one who pushed for Flynn and Kushner got Jersey Jabba fired from the transition team, this is just a revenge move.

  • Ricky Gay

    “not my cup of tea” and that the two “didn’t see eye-to-eye.”- man, that Christie knows how to coin a phrase!!!

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      He just came up with that. Do you like it?

      • Ricky Gay


  • Chadwells

    OT: And you’re a fucking cunt.

    “DeVos: School choice opponents are ‘flat Earthers’”

    • proudgrampa

      Pot and kettle…

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Uh oh. Throwing the base under the bus.
      Next thing you know she’ll be saying that “school choice opponents” think the earth is 6000 years old.

    • Stulexington

      Daw, she thinks people respect her opinion.

    • Wild Cat

      I dream she is old, in need of medical care, her money all lost in The Crash of 2019, and for a nurse she has an illiterate seventeen-year-old who thinks her pain injection goes into her eyeball.

    • C4TWOMAN

      Wow, IMAX level projection, lady.

    • jodyleek

      Whenever I hear about this Betsy person, I am reminded of the attack of the Amway salesperson many years ago. My now ex-husband was on the verge of being suckered into the whole Amway bullcrap by a fellow college alum and when my then-husband told the dude that his wife (me) didn’t want to invest in this “business opportunity” the dude says, “When are you going to stop listening to your wife and become successful?” Yeah, Betsy is just following the Amway playbook. What a bitch.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      FOAD, Betsy Wetsy. Your ideas are wrong and you should feel bad. If the earth were flat, cats would’ve pushed everything off the edges by now.

  • jesterpunk

    Hey this quote also fits Christie.

    “I saw him,” Trump said of the speech. “He was very emotional and
    probably looked like a nice guy to me. His wife … if you look at his
    wife, she was standing there. She had nothing to say.”

    “She probably, maybe she wasn’t allowed to have anything to say. You tell
    me,” Trump continued. “But a plenty of people have written that. She was
    extremely quiet, and it looked like she had nothing to say. A lot of
    people have said that.”

  • Scooby

    $50 bucks says the Christie kid eats it.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    SOMEbody’s got his knickers in a twitch over not getting his fair share of free stadium food.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      I remember the Twitchy Knickers. They opened for Squirrel Pudding on the Southeastern leg of their North Dakota tour in ’86. Good band, until that garden massacre incident derailed their career.

  • Chadwells

    “‘I’m not going to get into specifics,” Christie said. “Some of it involves classified information that I’m just not at liberty to discuss.'”

    Dude, seriously? Only way you could have seen classified intel is if it was written on the wax paper in the bottom of a Krispy Kreme box. STFU and GTFOH.

    • Mumen Rider Justice CRASH!

      Or if he happened to have lunch at Merry Lego at just the right time

      • Chadwells

        HAH! True story!!!

  • Shoto

    O/T. Jewish girl (figuratively) slaps around Richard Nazi Spencer in the gym.

    • pat tolle

      @Bill D. Burger •No, Christie would not eat Flynn if he were on fire, he’d wait until he (Flynn) was nicely roasted, then eat him.

  • Bill D. Burger

    He did, however, get a big ol’ sandwich, yooooge’, from Trump for his loyalty….and he gobbled it right down.
    Alas…..Trump just laughed, and laughed….and Christie got bupkis.

    But Christie persisted.

  • jesterpunk
    • All i can think is “why tom hiddleston? why?”

  • Apple Scruff

    I just moved to Jersey and boy, do they hate him here. Even the Republicans. The local talk radio guy (a conservative) was trying to get #corruptchristie to trend on Twitter today. It was delicious.

  • Wild Cat

    “If you are who you say you are, then why don’t you look like Him?”
    —Nietsche to Christ-bearer Christie

  • Nounverb911

    “and that he’s a possible contender to replace one of the very bad current members of the White House staff”

    The many peoples of New Jersey would thank trump for doing just that.

  • Bill D. Burger
    • Shoto

      Ewwww. But The Journalamism is not pretty.

  • Shoto

    Quick Question: Does this mean Chris Christie ends up with less sammiches, or moar sammiches?

    • Nounverb911

      Whatever sammiches they serve in the Federal slammer.

  • Nounverb911
  • armed_bears



    “I was aware of intelligence and information about contacts between Russian officials and U.S. persons that raised concerns in my mind,” Brennan said. He emphasized that the information he saw did not amount to proof of collusion or cooperation between Trump associates and Russia, but said that it “served as the basis for the FBI investigation.”

    • Good_Gawd_Yall


  • Mpeg

    Even with your cushy WH appointment, Christie?… Bruuuuuuce would still haunt your dreams~

  • President in Exile Firefly

    Saaaaay, you know who else didn’t see eye to eye?

    • Nounverb911


    • redarmyzombie

      Edward Teach?

    • MynameisBlarney

      Snake Plissken?

      • President in Exile Firefly

        To be fair, I thought he was dead.

        • MynameisBlarney

          He gets that a lot.

    • UnsaltedSinner

      Marty Feldman?

  • President in Exile Firefly

    What Christie really wants to know is why Flynn refused to share his Turkish Delight.

  • Nounverb911
    • UnsaltedSinner

      Not fair! I hear he’s also capable of placing traffic cones to block bridges.

  • Indivisible Snark Tank

    You know I love my Wonkette famiglia, and think Evan is fantastic at his job.

    But I still hate the way that casual fat-shaming is acceptable. Christie and Dampnut have plenty of despicable traits, do we really need to pick the low-hanging fruit?

  • Old Man Yells at Cloud

    I can’t tell from that photo; is Governor Donuts picking is nose, licking his fingers or both?

  • Bill D. Burger
    • BreakingDeadMen

      Is that picture from their ill-fated canoe trip?

  • Spurning Beer

    Negotiations for a position for Christie in the administration are complicated by his insistence that he be able to bring along his close associate Artie Bucco.

  • La forza del resistino

    “I didn’t think that he was someone who would bring benefit to the president or to the administration,” Christie said
    The first thing Chris didn’t kill by just sitting on it.

  • ThunderCat

    CC tried so hard to ingratiate himself. Practically with Trump from day one, standing next to Trump making lame (at his expense!) jokes at rallies and laughing dutifully at same (looking like a Stockholmed Handmaid), trying to herd the transition cats in the right direction–and then, this: relieved of his duties overseeing the transition shortly after the November election!

    Maybe he should have laughed harder? Trump likes people to smile bigly when he’s around. (see Melania putting on that big smile!)

    I’m reminded of some lines from Schiller’s Die Verschwörung des Fiesco zu Genua:
    “Der Mohr hat seine Arbeit // Der Mohr kann gehen.”

    He just hasn’t left yet.

    He simply can’t.

    • He also didn’t look the part. We know trump needs his team to look the part.

      • ThunderCat

        True dat — maybe he could have served a similar purpose Keith Richards (in his case: making Jagger look younger) serves: making Trump appear slimmer.

  • However, Chris Christie would pee on Michael Flynn if Trump asked him to do it.

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    Guys, guys, guys – there are ALL THE REASONS to hate on Chris Christie. The weight jokes make us no better than Dump supporters. Let’s confine ourselves to hating on him for all the horrible shit he’s done, shall we? As a person who has gained a lot of weight since 11.9.16 I say, please, this is enough.

    • Edith Prickly

      Thanks for speaking up, I could do without the fat jokes too. Christie’s behaviour is the worst thing about him, not his weight. Let’s not act like common Hillary trolls who talk shit about her looks.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      I agree with your point. I would also say the snark-at least in my case-is not about weight or appearance, but about the hypocrisy of those who see these kinds of issues as a type of punishable moral failing in others. Which doesn’t let me off the hook, btw.

    • BearGHAZI

      You gained weight? I started smoking 11/8/16 and I haven’t been able to quit. Damn you, Dampnut

    • Alice Jones

      Thank you! Hate him cause he’s awful. He would be awful at any weight. His body has nothing to do with his inherent awfulness, but everytime we start talking about him and bringing out the fat jokes in the midst of talking about what a shit human he is, it kinda conflates the two & subtly reinforces that cultural narrative that all day people are inherently bad. And that’s just not true. I’m fat & I’m fucking delightful.

      On another note, while Christie is awful in most regards, I have heard him speak with surprising insight on the opioid crisis. He is very forward thinking on it & as an addiction professional I was very much in favor of looking forward to him heading up some sort of task force or whatever to deal with it. I thought it was literally the only intelligent thing Trump done. Sucks that it looks like we are stuck with Tom Price’ s ideas – He just wants to push twelve step ideology, which saves millions of lives, sure, but which alienates millions of others. We need more ideas, fast, on the front lines.

      • SadDemInTex

        I want to upvote you on your addiction thoughts as well.

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    • Snopes Shop

      His figure is the most endearing thing about him.

      • BreakingDeadMen

        But he should never sit on a wall. A Humpty Dumpty joke, not a fat joke per se.

    • calliecallie

      Inherently, I agree with this, and try to abstain from jokes about appearance over all.
      As a long-time nailbiter, I have been uncomfortable with the ridicule Kellyanne gets for her very bitten fingernails. I have not spoken up in defense of nervous nailbiters everywhere. Instead, I somehow have managed to curtail my own biting habit since the inauguration, limiting myself to thumbs only. I currently have 7 out of 10 polished and presentable nails (it was 8, but one broke last week). This is a highly unusual state of affairs for me. And I have Kellyanne and the wonketterati to thank for it.

    • SadDemInTex

      I have ALWAYS been uncomfortable with appearance shaming. Let’s just say that Christie and 45 must be very unhealthy and they need to do something about it.

    • Dinz6315

      I have to agree.

      I married the nicest guy who ever lived. Smart, funny, honest, loyal, kind, hardworking, gifted, and great in the bedroom. Also, he happens to be “dimensionally challenged,” as we jokingly call it.

      I’ve also had patients “eat through” bariatric surgery. I wish it were that simple. Obesity isn’t just a matter of gluttony vs. self control, as we are continuing to learn through whatever science the Republicans deign to leave us.

      End of rant. Sorry.

  • OddMan

    ‘This Saturday Night!
    Spider and the Crabs opening for Escalating Public Frenzy at the Rapid City Vets Hall, Sunday they will be in Sioux Falls National Guard.’
    ~ Fondly remembers 50,000 watt KOMA

  • BreakingDeadMen

    I don’t think he is trying to ingratiate, Trump is still backing Flynn. I think he’s trying to gloat, but it still calls attention to his utter lack of….

  • OrG

    All of these fuckers are dirty. Sooner or later someone will roll over to save their ass,and then the floodgates should open.

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    Can we dispense with the fiction that Dump gives a fuck about Flynn? He has proven again and again that the only people he cares about are himself, himself, and himself, plus sometimes his adult children. (Barron can go eat a bag of dicks; he’s not old enough to talk bidness with yet.) If he’s showing concern for Flynn it’s only because he knows that the line from Flynn’s collusion with Russia leads straight to himself. The “stay strong” and “maybe I’ll be able to have you back in my administration” talk is code for “don’t spill the beans on me, and I’ll take care of you.”

    • La forza del resistino

      Tiffany is doing Georgetown Law. I sense a payback strategy.

    • Bobathonic

      I’m sort of surprised he didn’t tinkle him with whorey water. I mean, bless him with a preemptive pardon.

      • BreakingDeadMen

        You mean piss on him?

        • Bobathonic

          Tomayto, tomahto.

  • La forza del resistino

    OT: Life isn’t fair when you turn on the tv to get the weather forecast and are exposed to Trey Gowdy doing his country bumpkin lawyer act.

    • BreakingDeadMen

      Fucking Draco

  • Carpe Vagenda

    After he said Christie got to be opioids with Kellyanne, Trump said it was Jared’s now, so I suspect Christie was already SOL. I doubt he’d be barking if he wasn’t.

    Also I suspect he’s got an NDA, which has to be killing him right now.

    • shivaskeeper

      If he was briefed on classified info, even lower level stuff, he would have signed an NDA. Maybe he wants to testify for getting snubbed so he can spill what he knows in the right venue. Who knows with any of these people anymore.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Oh, that, but I’d be really amazed if Trump didn’t make him sign a personal one too.

        • Bobathonic

          Personal NDAs don’t apply for criminal discussions.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            Ah. Good to know.

        • shivaskeeper

          That is his style. But the NDA for classified stuff is not the same.

          That is why he wants his personal security on top of the Secret Service. His personal guys will sign the personal NDAs.

    • Meccalopolis

      That’s what leaks are for!

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Villago Delenda Est

    Would Chris Christie eat Michael Flynn if Michael Flynn were shaped like a Krispy Kreme?

  • Juan de Fuca

    You know who else wouldn’t bring any benefit to the president? A governor who bullies school teachers and humiliates his own constituents in public. And he can’t even get a job from a guy who’s based his entire life on bullying and humiliating others. Sad.

  • anon_the_great

    In retrospect
    canning Christie for Pence
    makes a whole lot more sense

    • Bitter Scribe

      Bleh. Rotten to-may-to, rotten to-mah-to.

  • kittygrrl

    A xenophobic racist sexist three-star general pissed off at being fired by a black man decides to betray his country as payback. As a compromised spy for both Russia and Turkey, he was the head of the NSA, and who knows what secrets he passed along before he was reluctantly fired by BFF Rump. Flynn is the tip of the iceberg taking down the SS Rumptanic.

    • Trip Space-Parasite

      I’m pretty sure National Security Advisor and No Such Agency are not related. But this does not invalidate your larger point!

    • Bobathonic

      Didn’t anyone notice the sudden spate of dead Rooskies, some of whom worked for our spooks, right after the bestest inauguration evar? Where did Pooty Poot get the names?

    • Lamashtar

      One thing that puzzles me: Flynn was supposed to be prejudiced against Muslims, but he went to work for the Turks? Who are Muslim? Getting more problematic extremist? Considered kidnapping the extremist Muslim dictator’s rival in the States?

      Theres a lot of things going on with Flynn. Together they say “sneaky”.

      • Ferroequinologist Ron

        Turkey is, IIRC, fairly secular. It’s Muslim in much the same way that England is Protestant.
        Besides, people of his stripe will happily tell you that money has no religion.

        • Lamashtar

          Erdogan uses fundamentalist religion and strongman charisma tactics to raise himself to power though. You’d think Flynn would be alarmed by that.

  • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

    Amazing exchange as Brennan boomerangs Gowdy's attempt to get him to say no collusion – whoops!— Ken Gude (@KenGude) May 23, 2017

    • Terpsichord

      Well ,howdy, Gowdy!
      Did anyone notice Elvis in the lower right corner? Didn’t Nixon make him a special agent at one point?

    • What is wrong with his face and skin? Seriously, he looks like a burn victim.

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        Good question. He doesn’t look well.

      • alpacapunchbowl

        Too much microdermabrasion? Botched daily chemical peels?

  • BearGHAZI

    Christie would have tied up traffic so bad on Pennsylvania Avenue that NO ONE could get into the WH

  • Alan

    So my impression of Christie is that he’s just kinda dull, stupid, not of average intellectual capacity. Am I close?

    • kareemachan

      You were very nice putting that “kinda” in there…

    • therblig

      what do 10 credit rating downgrades for NJ under his “leadership” suggest?

    • Not really. He was a fairly good prosecutor back in the day. I think that becoming Governor triggered ambition that he isn’t built for – he’s not one of the rich and powerful, he isn’t famous, he’s not a made man, but he wants to be all of those things, and grifters like Trump and the entire GOP can smell his neediness.

    • Bitter Scribe

      He’s smart but doesn’t seem to have much emotional intelligence.

  • Me not sure
  • Zyxomma

    The Outlaw Jersey Whale speaks! (I know, whale libelz).

  • Mary Theresa

    Is this Christies second or third audition for The Apprentice?

  • Mavenmaven

    They say the rich call Trump the “S**t Midas” because everything he touches turns to not-gold, and Christie’s career is a perfect example.

    • BreakingDeadMen
    • Bitter Scribe

      Meh. It was Christie’s choice to let Trump touch him. His judgment there was a good as his judgment in hiring aides, or anything else. I have zero sympathy for him.

  • Flashman

    “I’m not going to get into specifics,” Christie said. “Some of it involves classified information that I’m just not at liberty to discuss.”

    Translation: Give me immunity for everything I have done in life, and a couple of bags of Cheetos, and I’ll tell you.

    • SisterArtemis

      how the fuck did Christie become privileged to classified info?

      • Mehmeisterjr

        By hangin’ around, like you do.

        I’m always getting classified information just by hangin’ around.

        Actually, I don’t but isn’t that the normal pattern? Code Level intel goes to any slacker who happens to be hangin’ around and if Russian espionage agents are there, so much the better.

        You, not?

    • Mehmeisterjr

      Well, tell ya what, Chris, you just publicly incriminated yourself while trying to incriminate others. That’s clumsy.

      Admittedly, they are worse than you but you stuck your nose into it, so you are now the current first-level target.

      Being an attorney and all, you should have thought of this.

      Make the plea deal first, dude! Behind closed doors.

      If you were angling for a White House job this way, you were sooooooo off the target.

      There is no way that Trump is going to turn on Jared, chief pimp-my-wife consultant until he finally does.

      Until then, Jared hates you, man. You put his father’s crooked ass in jail. Get the picture?

      I amazed at how dumb these guys on the most basic level.

  • Edith Prickly

    I am actually more pissed at that sanctimonious hypocritical fuckhead Mike Pence. He knew exactly what Flynn had been up to and covered for him anyway. Pence can STFU about Jesus and what other people do with their bathing suit areas forever and ever, amen. I hope he goes to prison with the rest of them.

    • I can’t be that pissed off at Pence – I already thought that he was thoroughly evil from day one.

      • Edith Prickly

        I had given Pence the benefit of the doubt previously because it seemed possible he is stupid enough that Flynn fooled him – but the evidence says otherwise. LOCK HIM UP!

        • See, we went through this with Bush and Cheney. If the front man is an idiot, then his running mate is going to be the Prince of Darkness.

          • Edith Prickly


        • Mehmeisterjr

          And lock him up first.

          And lock up Ryan second.

    • SisterArtemis

      Pence would fit right in with the Republic of Gilead,* which makes him scary as fuck twice over, imho
      *handmaid’s tale reference, for those not in the loop

      • Ferroequinologist Ron

        Of course he would. Gilead is his Ideal State, and what he and his odious fellow-travellers are working towards.

  • SisterArtemis

    So, loved this article, even up-hearted it, but I must make my sporadic note on Christie being a Big Feller.

    I’d be perfectly ok if I never had to hear or read another fat joke about Christie, who is vile enough on actual merits. No need to drag fat shaming into the picture.

    This ends my mild, bi-annual rant about fat shaming this admittedly disgusting piece of craven shit.

    • DT

      He’s a disgusting craven piece of shit that ate through a lap band. He deserves scorn. He’s definitively fat due to his own gluttony and nothing more.
      Also, the fat jokes aren’t ever framed as his fattiness is why he’s bad, so I just don’t see it as fat shaming.

      • SisterArtemis

        it’s about using fatness as a metaphor for disgusting, not that being fat is what makes him a bad person.

        • DT

          I’m sorry if it hurts your feelings but being that fat is disgusting.

          • SisterArtemis

            It’s not that it hurts my feelings. I could give a shit what you think about me.

            This is an issue of dismissing or belittling a person based on assumptions about their body size, which has zip to do with their ethics, capabilities, accomplishments, or policy positions. It’s also about people making assumptions about why any particular individual is fat.

            Again, plenty of material, in Christie’s case to target him on the merits of his behavior and impact as an elected official, and as a participant in the Trump campaign.

          • DT

            No, it’s not. And I’ve already explained why.

          • HarpyLibtart

            Actually, you didn’t – you offered up an statement as to why you felt it was OK to make fat jokes about Christie in particular, followed with a declaration that you “don’t see it as fat shaming”.
            You then immediately followed that with the statement “being that fat is disgusting”, clearly indicating that you think less of persons of a certain size, whether you would tell them that to their faces or not.
            You don’t have to be a fat person to recognize bullying when you see it and it is insulting and demeaning that you would assume that the only reason SisterArtemis might object to that is because she is overweight – if it’s wrong when Drumpf does it to women, it’s wrong to do it to Christie.
            If you’re going to stoop to that level, own your prejudice instead of using his character failings to justify your hypocrisy,

          • SisterArtemis

            Thank you! I’d decided not to pursue the conversation, sensing some deaf ears there, but I appreciate your take on it.

  • whitroth

    Wait, wait: HE TOLD PRESIDENT-ELECT about Flynn? Which, ahh, means TRUMPOLINI KNEW. Time to contact someone like Schiff, and suggest they subpoena *Christie*, to tell them what he told the Orange One.

    Who, let me note, I have decided to change his middle name to Jane, because he’s an iggerant, pussy-grabbing SLUT, Jane!

  • Ferroequinologist Ron

    Hey, Chris: ‘Fool me once.’

  • Dolmance

    Christie is so fat, smaller fat guys orbit around him.
    Christie is so fat, the alligator on his shirt is real.
    Christie is so fat, he makes the record skip, at the radio station.
    Christie is so fat, he’s got his own zip code.
    Christie is so fat, when I told him I wanted pigs in a blanket, he jumped in bed.
    Christie is so fat, when he sat on a rainbow, Skittles shot out.
    Christie is so fat… Christie is so fat… Christie is… Oh, God, I just made myself sick.

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