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Well today’s twin scoops from the New York Times and the Washington Post were a long time coming, but now that they’re here, let’s assume we can relax until morning! (And then anything that happens is Robyn’s responsibility!)

For now, let’s make like Hillary Clinton, in this debate prep clip shared by that dick Philippe Reines, and dance away from the “hugs” of Donald Trump!

May the odds be ever in your favor, and this is YOUR OPEN THREAD!

$
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  • Painter of Goats

    Today we are all Hillary trying to escape Donald’s embrace.

  • chazmanr
  • memzilla Ω
    • calliecallie

      I could not help but read that as “Meals on Wheels: American Racoon Edition.”

    • SadDemInTex

      Poor baby

      • memzilla Ω

        Are you kidding? He’s headed to the Promised Land!

        • Ωbjectifier

          Sit down young raccoon and let me tell you of a land called City Dump. It’s a magical place with mountains of trash as far as the eye can see.

    • marxalot
    • (((fka_donnie_d)))

      Came home one night when I was about 16, little motherfucker was chilling on the garbage can Don Corleone style – like, “can I have some more apple cores next time”?

    • Nockular cavity

      “DON’T CALL ME A RACCOON!”
      “Okay, fine. Trash panda.”
      “Is that better?”
      “I don’t know”
      “Yeah, it’s better. No, it’s worse. It’s WAY worse!”

      • Fancy Meau-Faux

        As much as that line made me laugh, it did pull me out of the movie and bugged me a bit. It’s very modern slang and Quill left Earth in 86.

  • Apple Scruff

    Anyone watching MSNBC? This rep Francis Rooney from FL is a real piece of work. He’d better clean the shit off his nose from being so far up Trump’s buttcrack.

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸
    • SammyDEEEE

      Please clap.

    • beingreleased

      “I wonder what Jeb Bush thinks about this” said no one ever.

    • Apple Scruff

      Yeah, him and the rest of us.

      He’s a real Nostradumbass.

    • chazmanr

      Proving that even a Bush can occasionally be correct.

  • delete your account probably

    did you know that if you repeat back everything a wingnut posts but prefixed with *traitor voice* they get super mad?

    • delete your account probably

      this is my hobby now, I guess, here in the dystopian wasteland of 2017

      • Ωbjectifier

        I like to go to Breitfart and see how quickly I can get banned. My record is 14 minutes.

        • delete your account probably

          I tried once but blood came out of my eyes and ears

          • Ωbjectifier

            It’s not for the faint of heart. You’ll need shots as well.

    • mrFawkes

      I like to add “and then the murders began” to their posts.

    • Nockular cavity

      Will use that! Thanks!

  • Joe Beese
  • Sheepshagger

    Man I hope Obama still has that black hole that eats 757s. Might be handy.

    • beingreleased

      Why didn’t Obama declare himself President for Life when he had the chance? Actually, he probably still can.

      • Paperless Tiger

        While you were out the country, we got to thinking …

    • Anna Rompage

      Perhaps we can get the pilot of AirForce 1 to make his flight plan pass right through the middle of the Bermuda Triangle on the way back…

      • WotsAllThisThen

        And if that doesn’t work, the South China Sea.

  • WotsAllThisThen
    • Joe Beese

      If their single had come out just two months earlier or two months later, they wouldn’t have gotten to open Live Aid.

      Timing is everything.

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸
  • Joe Beese
  • Sheepshagger
    • Robbertjan Brandenburg
      • data_ninja

        ResevoirVOTE dogs

    • girlscientist

      Will Ivanka stay married to him if he goes to prison? Will she go to prison herself?

      • Joe Beese

        Loyalty is not in her genes.

        • girlscientist

          She’s disturbingly loyal to her father, although probably nobody else.

      • Sheepshagger

        Ha! You made me actually laugh.

      • CeeQ

        She doesn’t seem the type to wait on her man.

        How much do you think Jared is crying into his Brooks Brothers right now? Speed dialing everyone who’s ever owed him a favor as we speak I am so sure.

        Looks like picking a giant fight with the IC wasn’t such a hot idea.

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      god do i hate the way cops say “Have a seat”…it’s so menacing.

      • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

        Yes, but in this case, it’s really so satisfying.

        • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

          Can I play bad cop? I really want to be the bad cop.

          • Can I be good cop? I’ve always wanted to say “I’m tryna help ya here. Now, my partner- he’s not so understanding.”

        • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

          i was picking up an auction item from a CBP office once. The guy in charge told me to have a seat…I was convinced i was leaving that office in handcuffs just based on his tone.

          • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

            That’s hilarious. I know what you mean!

            This is suddenly reminding me of the time I was in the mall with my then pre-schooler, who was in his stroller. I’d told him, okay, we can go now, but he started misbehaving, so I said, fine, I still had one more errand in Nordstrom, so if you’re going to be like that, we’ll go finish my errand. Hmmmph. I wheeled him up to the counter in the junior department (I had to get a gift for my friend’s 13 year old daughter). There was a young salesgirl there finishing up a phone call behind the counter. My son was still misbehaving, so I said in my firmest Mom tone: “That behavior is NOT okay and you need to stop that RIGHT NOW.” So the salesclerk (who couldn’t see the stroller) hastily hung up in the middle of her call and said “I’m so sorry! I’m sorry!”

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            heh, mom voice. good point, right up there with cop voice.
            ; )

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Does this mean he won’t be selling sandwiches anymore?

    • violet moon

      All of them witches

  • Alexander Stallwitz

    Since Alies died, I been thinking about how we are living in a world where the truth doesnt matter anymore. That was the hardest part of the election for me to understand how so many people could have voted for Trump especally women. The problem is we have a large percentage of the popularance who simply refused to accept reality. They live in a fantasy world where any facts that dont match their beliefs are “Fake News” how do you debate these people? I know several people including Schoolteachers who believe Obama wasnt born in America. I am at a loss on what to do, I wish i had a good answer or magical solution.

    Here have a fox being petted as a thank you https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/9728f2aa25875320b0345981faa75ed4c9f5ced7622f046ea32f17658520a647.gif

    • An unorthodox good boy, but a good boy nonetheless.

      • marxalot

        They’re all good degs, Brunt.

    • Sheepshagger

      You destroy them with electoral politics. They won’t get better but t they will be ashamed and go back to their holes.

    • Some of this is due to existing prejudices and regional antagonisms, which are exacerbated by the splintering of media, so they seek out those which validate them. I live in a mostly lily-white rural area, and some of the things I’ve heard about “big cities” – and in particular the minority populations there – bear very little resemblance to what I know from having spent years in them. It isn’t helped by places like Fox News telling them what they want to hear.

      Add in that most of these places are experiencing a decline in population, as well as watching the better-paid jobs that used to not require much in the way of education disappear, and they’ll lash out at what they “think” is the cause.

    • Picabo

      Cute, but I would not do that. Rabies shots hurt.

      • MrTusks

        Probably a pet.

    • Nockular cavity

      Since Alies died, we have the chance to rebuild the world. (I don’t think that’s too dramatic, because a nuclear-armed world where truth is irrelevant cannot last long.) As we do that, let’s beat them electorally, and mock them mercilessly, and IF they get violent–I’M NOT BREAKING THE RULES HERE MODS–knock them senseless.

    • Oxidation Suspenders

      Weaponized misinformation. My father in law – who was a smart person when he was working – has had the TV on Fox since he retired 10 year ago and just last weekend fell for the Time magazine “Ice Age” cover hoax. He used it in an argument with me to prove that there is no evidence of global warming. He was so sure that it was true, I guess because the message has been repeated so many times and so loudly that he believes it now. This isn’t an accident, it is a deliberate effort to form wrong beliefs in otherwise good people and it is criminal.

      My mother in law (who was never very smart) believes that she must watch Fox in order to “be smart.” Both of them have been brainwashed to the extent that if they hear it on Fox, it’s true and if they repeat it, they’ve won the debate.

      I don’t have an answer for you as to how to debate these people. I try to be polite and point out the fallacies, but I can’t compete with 24 hours of screaming (talking) heads on the idiot box.

      Thanks for the fox getting a tummy tickle. That was nice.

      • jaspersdad

        The Guardians of the Fallacy

        Trevor Noah

    • violet moon

      Now I want a fox.

  • not_vh

    another verbification of a perfectly good noun. anywho, let’s open thread.

  • IOnlyLikeCats

    I needed to bring my blood pressure down (my anxiety makes it spike and scientists who argue against the connection can climb up a tree [REDACTED] and take their blood pressure, for science) and Future Mr. Cats told me when I tried on my glasses he was going to ask for a picture and tell me “Here’s my number, so call me maybe.”

    • Anna Elizabeth

      He’s a Keeper. :)

  • calliecallie

    Guess we’ re dancing, huh?
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dptqCpxAIGE

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    “I do not dance.”
    “‘Do not’ or ‘cannot’?”
    Will not.”

  • TJ Barke
  • Daisy

    Dance party, yay! This, because they all dance better than I could ever dream of:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BVwAVbKYYeM

    • TJ Barke

      Kids these days…

  • marxalot

    This weekend. Guardians of the Galaxy, or rollercoasters?

    • Alexander Stallwitz

      Guardians of the Galaxy!!!

    • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

      Both? Guardians is great, but I say if it’s nice weather, rollercoasters, save the movie for too hot or rainy times.

    • DT

      I’d say the ride is pretty intense, with a lot of ups and downs and some crazy highs and lows.

      So maybe the rollercoaster if GotG2 making your emotions its plaything sounds too intense.

    • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

      I love that number. Rodgers & Hammerstein, two fine Jews….

  • Poly_Ester

    These daily scoops are becoming the “one-a-day vitamins” of the Deep State.

    • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

      Interestingly, in Hitler’s Germany, if you had high-level connections, the slang term was you had “Vitamin B” (“Beziehungen” is the German word for “connections”). “How does that low-level SS officer get away with that arrogance” (or, more likely, “Isn’t it true that he has a Jewish mistress?”) –answer would be “They say he has a lot of Vitamin B.”

  • bluicebank

    Starting to look like the NYT and WaPo might have to share next year’s Pulitzer Prize for Investigative Reporting, if they insist on taking the contest so seriously.

    Also, anyone have a guess who is the inside man at the WH? I mean, the NYT report: There were only so many people in that room with POTUS and the Russians.

  • Me not sure

    Going to dinner with friends tonight. If Trump’s trip results in a world-ending faux pas,
    it’s been nice knowing you all. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/85cf7b1ef9590f3d747d6d53e230935a4721f80b9047ca07c6f8205696f4f57d.png

  • Sheepshagger

    Does anyone know if trumps speech on Islam is going to be televised? I liked the book Crash and this seems about as close as real life is going to get.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Sorry, only Russian media will be allowed in.

  • not_vh
    • Strepsi

      01:55 🔥

  • Anna Elizabeth
    • not_vh

      hey anna. how are you? crazy week for me.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Better today, Hun. Thank you. A day at a time, and no PTSD triggers today so far. :)

        Hopefully we can all have a nice weekend.

        • not_vh

          you bet

    • Paperless Tiger

      The boss is out of town so we’re all partying.

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance
  • jesterpunk
  • not_vh
  • DT

    UnBREAKABLE!
    They’re alive, Dammit!
    It’s a miracle!
    UnBREAKABLE!
    They alive, Dammit!
    Them FEmales are strong as hell!

    IT’S BAAACKKKK!!!!!!!!!! A Shining light in this darkest timeline.
    http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2017/05/19/titus-makes-lemonade-inside-unbreakable-kimmy-schmidts-epic-beyonce-homage

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      i’m saving season 4.

  • TheGrandWazoo2
  • Strepsi

    My contribution to Wonkette Friday Night Presidential Impeachment Dance Party™ *knocks wood* …THIS VIDEO THO
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XKuJUxGntRI

  • Ωbjectifier
  • jesterpunk
  • Dancing? Really old school:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fNKRm6H-qOU

    • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

      OH NOTHING BETTER. NOTHING!!!!

    • HogeyeGrex

      I split my pants just watching that.

    • bluicebank

      Lol on that one trombonist. “Hey, I’m trying to play here!”

  • Picabo
  • Resistance Fighter Astraea

    Tell us before you slink off to the sidelines
    Before joining the forgotten brigade
    How so many be taken
    By an old con telling them to drink kool aid

    https://youtu.be/K9xyWLjwKDA

  • janecita
  • Cat Cafe for the Investigation
  • Lyly Sirivong
  • jesterpunk
  • Chadwells
    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      “I’m distractin’ you, ya turdblossom.”

  • Picabo

    A 3 dimensional dance by Arizona Airspeed.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j18W–e1h1o

  • Anna Elizabeth
    • jesterpunk

      GMTA

    • Honey, you just made my evening.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        I’m so glad, I adore this movie. :D

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    Put on your red shoes and dance the blues.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N4d7Wp9kKjA

  • jesterpunk
  • Résistance Land Shark Ω

    Fred and some firecrackers … in honor of our so called patriot visiting furrin’ countries …

    https://vimeo.com/173327919

  • Cat Cafe for the Investigation
  • Marceline

    Are we dancing? Time for my Friday Obama!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RsWpvkLCvu4

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      god he was cool.

  • Chadwells
  • Pinkham’s Law

    OK, I gots my red shoes on!
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxe-iylVQSY

  • TheGrandWazoo2
  • Picabo
    • Chadwells

      Good one!

  • janecita

    This a Latin video, with lots of t and a:-) Sorry, that’s the way we roll.

    https://youtu.be/ULoXlXJOZOo

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Sign me up! :)

      The other day I was sitting around in my bikini, and the building fire alarm went off. I grabbed my purse, shorts, and wedgies, and now 20 of my neighbors have seen me in my red bikini. XD

      • janecita

        That’s hilarious!

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Luckily it was a false alarm. I hope whomever is playing that game got evicted, but no one was hurt, thank goodness.

          And Ima in my bikini again today. :D

  • DainBramage
  • Stop trying to break disqus!

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Buh, but Editrix started it, mom!

  • Cat Cafe for the Investigation
    • Msgr_MΩment

      You dirty rat.

      • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

        Wasn’t he amazing? AMAZING! No one like him…

  • jesterpunk
    • Anna Elizabeth

      So <3 this one!

      • jesterpunk

        Yeah same here, Santana has so many great songs but this is one of the perfect summer songs.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Exactly.

      • BeachLoafer

        Carlos has been the man I turn to for driving irresponsibly with the windows open and the stereo up ALL the way for close to 50 years now :)

        • Anna Elizabeth

          xD Nice!

      • Résistance Land Shark Ω

        Still one of the finest guitarists … IMHO. And this song is THE summer crank-it-up tune.

  • Chadwells
  • data_ninja
  • AJ Milne
  • jesterpunk
  • Picabo
  • Cat Cafe for the Investigation
  • Chadwells
    • data_ninja

      AW YISS

  • data_ninja

    Why not come dancing? It’s only natural.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gs2kFrGluKs

  • girlscientist

    in honor of the Deep State:

    https://youtu.be/C-CG5w4YwOI

  • Yr. Gma

    I think Donnie is providing the entertainment on the flight.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WLLSqpYyPD8

    • BosGrl

      I just… the idea of Donald Trump anywhere near child Shirley Temple makes me want to hurl.

  • data_ninja

    Dance, Dance Motherfucker Dance
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YFvXt2PFnB8

  • DainBramage
  • CeeQ

    Should we start a Wonkette Dead Pool of who on Team Trump will get indicted first??

    Hahaha LOL as if. They will all still be in our lives being terrible at everything and not being held accountable.

    • jesterpunk

      AOT,K

  • Kiri the Unicorn
  • jesterpunk
    • Anna Elizabeth
      • jesterpunk

        Oh forgot about Blues Traveler, thanks I used to love them.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Welcome. I’m pretty sure this video is ribbing the Counting Crows.

          • Hahahahaha! First time I’ve seen the video. I think you’re right.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            xD I’ve been a fan of Blues Traveler since, Ima glad you like this one.

          • Yeah, I’ve always liked them, although I’ve never gone too deep into their music. Busting on the Counting Crows just made me like them more. (I have to admit, though, I love Mr Jones. and Me)

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Oh, I like the Crows too. :) But yeah, this is too funny.

  • Anna Elizabeth
  • therblig
  • Lyly Sirivong
  • Kiri the Unicorn
    • data_ninja

      Would you like to pet my monkey??

    • Chadwells

      LOL!!! The guy second from left is my ex brother in law!!! I shit you not!!!

      • BosGrl

        He does that thing that he does very well!

      • He must be very entertaining at weddings.

        • Chadwells

          He was a fun guy for sure! Haven’t seen him for a good 20 years.

  • lucidamente
  • boyblue122

    One week early, but why not

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kr0tTbTbmVA

  • janecita
  • Chadwells
    • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

      I can do that

      • Chadwells

        Proof or it didn’t happen!!

        • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

          My Canadian girlfriend has the tape

    • Gah! I had to go back an listen to “Smooth” again to get that goddamn song out of my head.

  • Vicki Lawrence Wig
  • data_ninja

    I swear every 80s movie that had even a high school in the background had this song in it.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1TNLU-ydLA

    • Me The People

      “Take your baby by the hair
      And pull her close and there, there, there
      And take your baby by the ears
      And play upon her darkest fears”

      This is fine!

  • Amelia Resists and Persists
  • data_ninja

    One of the best dance scenes in a movie EVER
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dnruGdu9yro

    • Ωbjectifier

      Gah! Shoulda scrolled down!

  • Pat Blake

    A little bit of shuffling and can-can from the Kinks.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3d8moA2Iksg

  • Chadwells
  • LadyLaz

    Just, you know, holy shit. The trump bots are out in masse on the Wapo story. So far it is: (1) but HRC (uranium, emails, dead staffer – false); (2) unnamed sources are garbage (even though Trump has been threatening criminal charges against leakers); and where is the evidence (ignoring the Trump administration’s attempts to meddle in the FBI investigation).

    Mix and match to your delight.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Don’t forget a generous helping of word salad as a side.

    • boyblue122

      unnamed sources – “many people are saying”

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω

    The people ’round here
    Can barely pay their rent
    They’re “try’n to make dollar
    Out ‘a fifteen cent”
    But we got a spirit
    Money just can’t buy
    It’s deep as a river
    And soars to the sky!

    https://youtu.be/H0Dxsmk-EZ8

  • bluicebank
  • Anna Elizabeth
  • janecita
    • wait! what?

      Pre-moleanoscopy.

      • janecita

        Yup!

        • not_vh

          is it true that you broke up with over that?

          • janecita

            Yes, I really loved that mole!

    • Red Bird Ω

      Very jealous.

    • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

      Does he smell good?

      • janecita

        He did:-)

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Gorgeous. The guy looks good too.

      • janecita

        Thanks:-)

  • Ωbjectifier
    • data_ninja

      GMTA!

  • Picabo

    Merry Monarch Festival. Hula dance rules!
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=21R_obs9HQ8

  • Chadwells
  • jesterpunk
  • data_ninja

    What kind of magic spell to use? DANCE MAGIC DANCE
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDkp7GysvbY

  • bluicebank
    • Lance Thrustwell

      Eternal upfists.

  • Ryan Denniston

    I hope they don’t let Chump tweet from Air Force One, but they do get the news. The impotence to respond and the torture that represents is justice.

  • wait! what?
  • Me The People
  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    a little dance from the border…

    https://youtu.be/xM5svRq8B-I?t=40

    • not_vh

      i once saw this live. it was exhilarating.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        at the little fairs and stuff they do it right there – no stage or nuttin.

        an ex was a folklorico dancer.

        • not_vh

          those are the best

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            only when the weather’s good and you got a nice plate of something in yoru hands.

            ; )

          • not_vh

            what you don’t like rain?

  • Rick Hill
    • data_ninja

      I’m assuming that cats dance the Meow-carena.

      I’ll show myself out.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    A dance thread? Awesome. Although I feel like we’re dancing on the edge of doom.

    https://youtu.be/dk-nWE9yeG8

    • DainBramage

      “Shame on you, Miss Leachman!”

    • Kakariki
      • WomanInThePersistence

        I adore this movie. It’s been the video equivalent of a blanky for me lately. Thanks!

  • janecita
    • data_ninja

      I love this song more than I should.

      • janecita

        Billy Idol is awesome!

  • Jon Sussex
  • Ryan Denniston
  • BosGrl
    • not_vh

      screw trump. lets dance without a care while he’s gone.

  • jesterpunk
  • Vicki Lawrence Wig
    • Anna Elizabeth

      I adore Kate Bush, and this was the first album of hers I bought. :)

      • Vicki Lawrence Wig

        I didn’t get into her until….6 years ago now? Started with the Sensual World…and haven’t looked back. My husband rolls his eyes when I’m on a drunk Kate binge, but then he also sings Wuthering Heights at random, so I think I won.

        • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

          There’s nothing wrong with randomly belting out “Heathcliff…”

          • Vicki Lawrence Wig

            Yes, well, he was belting out the word Waterford over and over. And I was like, um, you know she’s saying Wuthering? As in Wuthering Heights?

          • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

            LOL!!!

          • Vicki Lawrence Wig

            The irony being that he was named after Heathcliff.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          I agree! :D

      • snigsy

        Me too.

  • Chadwells

    Not everyones cup o tea…but I dig the Aphex Twin and this video was crazy. Takes me back.

    If you’re brave enough…….wait for it.

    https://youtu.be/UBS4Gi1y_nc

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      i love this song, never seen teh video.

      • Chadwells

        I think that video is on a lot of all time top 20 lists. I see it around a lot!

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      god richard, be LESS freaky.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    Damn, we apparently needed a dance thread.

    https://youtu.be/knCj92zA0tU

    • Chadwells

      Ahhhh….takes me back to my Devon Horse Show and the Radnor Hunt Club days!!!

    • Ryan Denniston

      I haven’t seen Evan’s iPhone shuffle in awhile. I blame Obama myself.

  • janecita
  • jesterpunk
    • snigsy

      Sweet sweet nostalgia.

      • jesterpunk

        That song used to piss off my uncle, so of course I would play it a lot around him because he is an ass.

        • snigsy

          I was about to ask you why it pissed him off, but I can guess.

          • jesterpunk

            He was in the navy reserves and is super religious with no sense of humor at all.

  • wait! what?

    Just a viral dance song.

    https://youtu.be/rKunaGdnk0w

  • boyblue122

    Some light summer reading/research for the WH lawyers

    https://twitter.com/cnnbrk/status/865694413292523520

    • Ryan Denniston

      It took a couple of weeks to figure out how to turn the lights on…

    • Up In Smoke O’hontas

      Wikipedia is gonna crash now, isn’t it?

  • Amelia Resists and Persists
  • Me The People
  • House0fTheBlueLights

    I see we’re going to have a dance thread, and jeez not a moment too soon.

  • IOnlyLikeCats

    Why are bandages so itchy? It’s like they were made to test your commitment to your health.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      One of the best things I learned from meditation is how to ignore itching.

      • data_ninja

        What about burning desires?

        • House0fTheBlueLights

          Well, theres itches and then theres itches.

        • Notreelyhelping

          Ohhhhhhhhhhmmm…

    • wait! what?

      I told my little brother it was because his skin was trying to mate with the bandage. That was good for a few years of mayhem.

    • Chadwells
    • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

      This is not helpful in the least, but I read that as Why are badgers so itchy, and I had a BUNCH of answers to that.

  • Picabo

    When I Saw Her Standing There.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3UQk2YGQ7mQ

  • jesterpunk
  • mackafritz
  • jesterpunk
  • jesterpunk
  • therblig
  • Ryan Denniston

    Rachel (Hi Rachel!!!), we’re looking forward to 9PM and thank you for your breathless coverage for two weeks of breaking news coverage!

  • Amelia Resists and Persists
  • snigsy

    After sharing a good chuckle while reading this morning’s posts about man-babies, my cats and I are now swilling some good wine. Molotov, everyone!

    • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

      Drunk cat pics or it didn’t happen!

      • snigsy

        Goddamn cats won’t let me.

        • Résistance Land Shark Ω

          They keeping taking away your phone? Maybe they should work for Donnie Dumbass … he could use some phone minders.

  • not_vh

    2 of the best dancers in hindi cinema. both trained in classical.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UFvL_FZt7Qc

  • Me The People
    • Begin Anew Day

      Cool Graphic!

      A record cover? An old print? Your own work?

      And the music ain’t shabby either.

  • Amelia Resists and Persists
  • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

    I feel like he’s the type to resign and not let anyone have the pleasure of impeachment.

  • Ryan Denniston

    “White House adviser close to Trump is a person of interest in Russia probe”

    Please be Reince Priebus, please be Reince Preibus…

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/national-security/russia-probe-reaches-current-white-house-official-people-familiar-with-the-case-say/2017/05/19/7685adba-3c99-11e7-9e48-c4f199710b69_story.html

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      I want Jared to do prison time, just like dear old Dad.

  • data_ninja

    Let’s not forget the Boss!
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEJ26h_cBqQ

  • Picabo

    Ann Margret & Elvis Presley Hot Dance in Viva Las Vegas
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ajSkcZwk12I

  • WomanInThePersistence

    Probably already posted. But I don’t care. Because I love this.

    https://youtu.be/N4d7Wp9kKjA

    • girlscientist

      It can never be posted enough!

    • snigsy

      I’m putting on my red shoes!

  • jesterpunk
    • data_ninja

      I was told once upon a time that they used this song (or maybe another song from Flash Dance?) in car speaker contests, because apparently it hit all of the right notes for testing and demonstration. Particularly the first half of it.

      • Jamoche

        Apple used this one for testing CRT monitors with integrated speakers : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Fc67yQsPqQ
        You could tell which prototype didn’t have enough shielding – the display would shimmy on the high notes.

  • Vicki Lawrence Wig
  • Amelia Resists and Persists
  • Slamtundra
  • Apple Scruff

    They just said on the news that Saudi Arabia is welcoming King Cheeto with billboards of his face lining the highway and American flags everywhere.

    He’s not going to want to come back.

  • Me The People
  • Hey…this is cool. I’m sure I’m not the only one to see it, but still pretty cool.

    http://www.npr.org/2017/05/18/529022011/fact-check-we-dont-have-health-care-in-this-country-trump-says

    Scroll down a scosch.

  • data_ninja

    This next skate is for couples only… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jVk3ELWameI

    Why yes, I am a child of the 80s, why do you ask?

    • Jamoche

      My brother had two favorites in high school – Debbie Gibson and Metallica. I don’t judge :)

  • Kakariki

    Alison Jiear – “I Just Wanna Fuckin’ Dance” (dance version) from Jerry Springer: The Opera
    https://youtu.be/rQChV3kU2xg

  • jesterpunk
  • Me The People
  • lucidamente
  • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

    It’s official – Comey is testifying in open session

    • jesterpunk

      Yay, I hope he can talk about everything.

      • Anna Rompage

        There will be certain things that need to be discussed behind closed doors I’m sure…

        • jesterpunk

          I just really want to hear him confirm what Trump said about trying to get him to drop the Russia investigation and leave Flynn alone.

      • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

        If Trump keeps calling him names, that list will grow

        • Lamashtar

          I’m told every time Trump talks about a time they were together, it waives Executive Privilege. So tweet, Donnie, tweet!

    • Popcorn, I need popcorn

    • h4rr4r

      That won’t hurt any criminal prosecutions right? I want to see some bastards hang for treason.

      • data_ninja

        With votes!

  • Another dance… when you don’t think of a distaste for perspiration
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_XTeorQC3K0

  • Anna Rompage
    • not_vh

      such an auntie she is. :D

      • not_vh

        such a happy smile she has.

  • alpacapunchbowl

    This one has been in my head since the 21st century Glass-Steagall article earlier. I’m not complaining.
    https://youtu.be/Ylww2dOW7fg

  • Amelia Resists and Persists

    https://youtu.be/NiHWwKC8WjU

    Last one for now, I think. Dance thread greatly needed, oh yes.

    • WomanInThePersistence

      We desperately need some happy times. What a fucking week.

      • Up In Smoke O’hontas

        Has it only been a fucking week?!?! I’m so glad I invested in a CSB (community supported brewery) in November!

  • Chadwells

    I’ll just tuck this amongst the thread of dance videos!!!

    “WH lawyers consulting experts on impeachment proceedings: report”

    http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/334330-wh-lawyers-consulting-experts-on-impeachment-proceedings-report

    • JustDon’tSaySurety

      Apparently my work laptop can’t go to The Hill dot com without locking up, but, before lockup, I saw the word “unpeached”.

      • Chadwells

        Looks like they are bracing for the Unpeaching!

        • JustDon’tSaySurety

          Which is weird, because it’s just starting to be stone fruit season.

    • An Outhouse for the Resistance

      Grow a brian, moran.

  • Ezio
  • lucidamente
    • Mehmeisterjr

      I luvs me some Rameau.

  • Chadwells
    • jesterpunk

      I like Fall Out Boy.

      • Chadwells

        I do too. It’s a guilty secret pleasure of mine!

        • jesterpunk

          Its not a secret I like them. They have some really good songs and are a pretty fun band.

          • Chadwells

            LOL! I know! I’m just messing around. I put on airs and this would blow my cover!!

          • BosGrl

            My Katie loved Fall Out Boy. This song is on her Spotify playlist. I listen to it all the time.

    • Amelia Resists and Persists

      Man, I love Fall Out Boy. No guilt necessary.

  • Kiri the Unicorn
    • BosGrl

      I listened to this cassette so many times in high school I wore it out.

  • jesterpunk
  • Chadwells

    Someone had to have posted this!!!

    https://youtu.be/wCDIYvFmgW8

  • Kiri the Unicorn
    • snigsy

      Cara mia!

  • WomanInThePersistence

    C’mon, folks. This is the. Best.

    https://youtu.be/mUbweBA5fh0

  • dvlaries

    Skip to 0:53 and avoid the yack
    https://youtu.be/PQ-aDCZ5kxg

    • Kakariki

      A useful thing if you want to share a video from YouTube and have it start from a point somewhere within the video, there is a box to check down by the SHARE field that lets you set when the video starts playing. You can just pause the video at the point you want and then copy the URL from the share field or even manually change the time within the url string. It comes in handy.

      • dvlaries

        Wow. Thank you. I love learning :) But we know that about each other already, or we wouldn’t be reading wonkette.

  • jesterpunk
  • Ezio
  • Kiri the Unicorn
    • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

      Excellent addition!

    • WomanInThePersistence

      I am constitutionally unable to not upvote this.

      • not_vh

        not upvoting this violates Article 1 of the Preamble to the Constitution.

        • WomanInThePersistence

          It certainly should.

    • hendenburg2
  • alpacapunchbowl

    Here’s to all the high crimes and misdemeanors trickling out like an aging pee hooker.
    https://youtu.be/na7lIb09898

  • Picabo
  • ManchuCandidate

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CdvITn5cAVc
    Really old school… I prefer this version over the Bowie/Jagger version.

    • An Outhouse for the Resistance

      I requested th Dead’s version at my son’s wedding reception a couple weeks ago. The DJ came up with this. I don’t think he knew it was 15 minutes long.

      https://youtu.be/DVRPW3RAQXY

    • Jamoche

      But the Bowie/Jagger version introduced a whole generation of future slashficcers to the concept of HoYay long before TWoP invented the term.

  • hendenburg2
  • IOnlyLikeCats

    http://www.bet.com/celebrities/news/2017/05/17/kim-kardashian.html?cid=FB_Game Oh, New York Times, you make it really hard not to break commenting rules.

    • IOnlyLikeCats

      Forgot to include original article and a quote, for maximum outrage. https://www.nytimes.com/2017/05/15/theater/venus-review.html?smid=tw-share&mtrref=t.co&_r=1 “… is just as good as another kind of sex slave here. She makes it clear that Sarah is complicit in her own exploitation, and yet finally feels bewildered and imprisoned by her immense, dubious fame.”

      • Jesus goddamn Christ. I forced myself to read the entire review. The only unoffensive thing about it was that it was short.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Oh fuck the NYT. Geezus Crispy what a bunch of assholes.

      • IOnlyLikeCats

        Was there not one black, female editor who saw this and thought, “OH, **** NO!”

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Or anyone really. Geez Louise!

        • WomanInThePersistence

          No.

    • MynameisBlarney

      What in the literal fuck?

  • Anna Elizabeth
  • Notreelyhelping

    Not a dance number, per se, but it sums up the pre-Mueller week.
    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=sdkSvdu89Uo

  • OK who’s going to be the first to roll over, Flynn or Kushner?
    https://twitter.com/TravelingUS/status/865680174179680257

    • Picabo

      Waiting for the perp walk.

    • snigsy

      Oh please please please. Maybe if we all tap our heels three times?

    • An Outhouse for the Resistance

      Definitely Jared.

      • janecita

        He does look like a rat.

  • Pre-existing Ugly Dude
    • Chadwells

      Get schwifty!!!!!!!!

  • Turgid Love Skwerl

    From CNN:
    But lawyers in the White House counsel’s office have consulted experts in impeachment during the past week and have begun collecting information on how such proceedings would work, a person briefed on the matter told CNN.

    https://media.giphy.com/media/FYx64DDl2ElWw/giphy.gif

  • aureolaborealis

    “Hey! I like two scoops! As long as no one else gets any. That’s good, right?”
    The Donald, probably.

    • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

      I know, the real key to that is that HE gets “two scoops” and NO ONE ELSE DOES. He truly is a nasty little six year old.

  • An Outhouse for the Resistance

    Where’s Evan? Did Wenesday break Evan? Truck Fump!

  • Me The People

    http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2017/05/19/trump-officials-he-looks-more-and-more-like-a-complete-moron

    Trump Officials: ‘He Looks More and More Like a Complete Moron’

    In the wake of yet another Russia-related bombshell, Trump aides despaired
    because they know President Trump only has himself to blame.

  • John Resistant Tovarich Smith
  • Shoto
  • jesterpunk
  • alpacapunchbowl
  • Chadwells

    Lest we forget…

    https://youtu.be/dMH0bHeiRNg

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      somebody’s kids are very veryvery embarrassed.

      • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

        Very little chance of him ever having kids

  • OddMan

    At the end of a week full of big Trump-Russia news, the Washington Post dropped yet another bombshell, reporting on Friday that a current “senior White House adviser” is a “significant person of interest” in the law enforcement investigation into potential Trump campaign collusion with Russia. That’s fancy talk for “potential suspect.”

    https://www.vox.com/world/2017/5/19/15666562/trump-russia-current-white-house-official

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/b138c53c8de06cb4530efe3a36ef215836a789ddbaea5383f627abb8c9ffd19f.png

    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      Stolen, and used for trolling.

  • Ezio

    Appropriate dance music for 2017
    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YDp9o47YX0Y

  • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

    Who can forget Churchill’s stirring speech– “We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; most of all, we shall fight in the ice cream parlors, so that I can have two scoops while the rest of you have one, ha ha, the end.”

    • Ezio

      “Leftists are all poopy heads and losers” -What conservatives like Paul Joseph Watson probably claims Churchill said.

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    Okay, I’m out for the evening. It’s time for sushi and bowling (but not bowling alley sushi because YUCK!).

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Have a good night.

    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      I’d rather eat the ball. And I like sushi!

    • Shanzgood

      It’s probably a better bet than gas station sushi.

      • h4rr4r

        Gas station sushi libels!

        • JustDon’tSaySurety

          Libels? really?

          • h4rr4r

            You need to visit a better grade of gas station.

            No really, around here we have some amazing ones. The one like 5 minutes from my house lacks sushi, but has fantastic Italian style pizza. Proper margarita pizza! The oven is sadly gas not wood though.

        • Kakariki

          Liz Lemon?

    • data_ninja

      Just keep your mind out of the gutter.

      • JustDon’tSaySurety

        That was foul

      • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

        Spare us

      • TootsStansbury

        You had me going good there, for a split second.

      • JustDon’tSaySurety

        ninja strikes again

        • JustDon’tSaySurety

          something something turkey

  • dvlaries

    Dedicated to Evan
    “Can’t wait to see his smiling face,
    Can’t wait to feel his warm embrace…”
    https://youtu.be/mYzu97djVyA

  • Chadwells
  • Kiri the Unicorn
  • jesterpunk
  • Sophia
    • jaspersdad

      That’s hilarious! I can’t stop laughing.

    • WomanInThePersistence

      I am playing this. And my dog is looking at me reproachfully.

      • Sophia

        Get that dog a squeaky chicken and get yourself some earplugs

        • WomanInThePersistence

          My wee dog can eviscerate a squeaky toy in minutes.

      • m3bosha

        My cat is sleeping on the couch and he just shoved his head upside down into the crack between the cushions. I don’t think he’s a fan.

    • HogeyeGrex
  • alpacapunchbowl

    Because we gotta have faith that we’re going to get through this (and not just faith of course, hard work at the resistance)
    RIP George
    https://youtu.be/lu3VTngm1F0

    • CeeQ

      Omg I loved this video so much

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Ima been dancing with my mirror for the past 30 minutes, and Ima exhausted. xD

  • Picabo
    • Anna Elizabeth

      You and I have a lot in common. :)

      • Picabo

        Ever skydive?

        • Anna Elizabeth

          No, but I’ve always wanted to. :) My dad was a skydiver before I was born, and I had planned to go to Jump School in the military.

  • CeeQ

    I feel like that the Russia investigation is basically gonna uncover that team trump are just literally a bunch of morons. Who had no clue what they were getting into and basically were used by the Russians to fuck with us. Cuz they were too stupid to realise what was happening. Given what we know today – it’s difficult for me to believe that there really was some kind of overt collusion. More like Accidental collusion due to aggressive idiocy.

    • Rick Hill

      That assumes they had no long term relationships already established.

    • The Wanderer

      The Gang That Can’t Think Straight?

    • shoeflyin

      “Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity” attributed to Heinlein …i think Josh Marshall has updated as “Trumps razor”

      • redblack

        that’s one of my favorite observations when dealing with the general public, who seem increasingly hostile, but who are actually just stupid. i’ve adopted it as a philosophy, right alongside the 80/20 rule.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Didn’t have to be Overt because the Russians already had their moles in place with Flynn and Manafort. Don’t accept candy from strangers. Even Ryan, who is supposed to be the smart one, got caught by that one.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    Before we get all serious, I’m not quite ready to give up the dancing.

    https://youtu.be/IYu4p0S4bZc

  • Picabo

    “Through the machineries of greed, pettiness, and the abuse of power, love occurs.”
    ― Thomas Pynchon, Gravity’s Rainbow

    • not_vh

      Corollary, through the accusations of degeneracy, deviance and abuse of norms, civilization and an equitable society is born.

  • Paperless Tiger

    The emoluments are always greener on the other side of the fence.

  • aureolaborealis

    Extremely NSFW. No, really. I warned you. Also: Don’t read the comments.

    https://youtu.be/WyL5ABXltW8

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      ummmm, in’m 22 seconds in and the guy is massaging a rock labia.

      Yeah.

      • aureolaborealis

        Guy?

        Keep watching.

        • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

          nope, just got to the part where she does a magicians hankerchief trick with a vag.

          I’m out.

          • aureolaborealis

            Tourist.

          • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

            I think they were feathers

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      P stands for Pretentious

  • dvlaries
  • Kakariki

    Yazoo (known in North America as Yaz) Alison Moyet & Vince Clarke – “Situation” Kervorkian Remix (US album version)
    Originally the b-side to their first single “Only You” and not included on the UK version of their debut album Upstairs at Eric’s
    https://youtu.be/eBOobFD-Jns

    • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

      Moyet is a goddess!!!!!

      • Kakariki

        Yes she is! She has a new album coming out titled Other and will be touring to promote it. I already have my tickets!

        This is the first single from the new album:
        https://youtu.be/PNuzHQxDBfE

        • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

          Sweet babby Jesus!

        • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

          What was she, 10, when she was with Yaz?

          • Kakariki

            Just barely 18 I think.

            She wrote “Midnight” when she was 16.

  • Anna Elizabeth
  • NotReallyHere

    I’ve gotten the impression that liking Xanadu is maybe not allowed on Wonkette. It’s not quite as bad as canned clams, but close. So, I’m a little hesitant to admit that I like Xanadu, but… I like Xanadu.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5bc803b1a529c1c1ee87e97bc8dbf52deccaee99703ad203888279c5d494654d.gif

  • dvlaries

    Kick off your shoes, baby
    and get in the groove
    cause when you hear the music
    Yo feet has got to move
    https://youtu.be/06OhSLXyXeU

  • Shoto
  • alpacapunchbowl

    Some charlatans are actually pretty cool
    https://youtu.be/0RJwW77Lsj8

  • AJ Milne

    Comey to testify in open…

    I half figure it’s all gonna be ‘cannot answer on basis of whatev’, but still amusing myself thinking of Trump’s allegedly stellar blood pressure right now.

    • Yr. Gma
    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      what’s the over /under on his “i do not recalls” vs. albertos.

      I’m siding with comey.

    • not_vh

      brb. gone popcorn shopping.

    • SisterArtemis

      Even when testimony is filled with “cannot answer” non-content, it often seems there are things they do say that offer clues to more information, whether behind the scenes/confidential, or otherwise. Sometimes it’s just info that puts timelines together, but it can be helpful.

    • violet moon

      He’s too dumb to be properly scared.

    • Persistent Demme

      Just the words, “Comey to testify” are enough.

  • The Wanderer
    • Serai 1

      Dammit, TURN YOUR CAMERA.

      • aureolaborealis

        I recently learned that, in addition to being an affront to visual decency, this also inflates the file size, because that masked-out area around the vertical letterbox is now part of the video.

  • Jennifer R

    Today is going to be a day off from drawing because I feel like everything has been drained out of me.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      ~hugs~

      • Jennifer R

        242 background drawings and 12 mobs, as well as maybe 2000 lines of code in 10 days. It sure plays nicer than it did two weeks ago though.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Well Done! I think you’ve earned a day off. :)

          • Jennifer R

            Just trying to ignore that I need to draw 873 more pictures to catch up to the already in place content. and like 17 more mobs. But like half of them are one time fights.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            One bite at a time, Jennifer. You’ll get there. :)

          • Jennifer R

            Yeah, I am at least 16 months into work on this. I know that I will be spending years to just bring this to a state of all content is in place. Let alone polished up.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I think long, absorbing projects are a good thing, like my wargame armies. :)

          • Jennifer R

            Yeah I agree.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I’m back at it on my stuffs, and it’s helping. I had to repair a few things, but that’s the nature of gaming miniatures.

          • Jennifer R

            I am looking forward to seeing updates on them!

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Thank you, I will be sharing. :)

    • Yr. Gma

      You need breaks for the creativity to replenish.

      • Jennifer R

        My wrist hurts so much too. I went from drawing, on average, 0 pictures per decade to 25 a day.

  • Yr. Gma
  • MynameisBlarney
    • Anna Elizabeth

      xD LOL

      • not_vh

        sometimes i feel we need similey’s here. not all the emojis atleast a few basic ones. on second thought smileys make forums look tacky. shy knows what he is doing.

    • data_ninja
    • Saxo the Grammarian

      If Lawrence Welk was still alive and working, Bobby Burgess and Cissy King would totally be doing this.

  • Saxo the Grammarian

    A knee to the groin is effective, too. Small target, but still works.

    (No votes, this is straight-up violence ideation.)

    • SisterArtemis

      or self-defense tactic

    • Jamoche

      Kicking their knees is more effective. Guys usually get the “twist to block” move down by the time they finish puberty, but knees are harder to defend. Plus no matter how hopped up they are, taking their knee out will incapacitate them.

  • Michael R
    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Look in those eyes! Benghazi! Emails! Vince Foster!

      • Saxo the Grammarian

        She’ll punch your lights out over a bunny rabbit!

        • Persistent Demme

          Yep!
          My first thought: “Bunny Avenger!”

      • Jamoche
      • Al Swearengen

        It makes me sad that she was emotionally-abused, which led to her life-long wariness around people. Which is to all our detriment with President Trump.

    • SisterArtemis

      Awwww.
      I have a campaign button with this image hanging where I get ready every morning, ‘cuz there’s a little pep talk in those eyes for me

    • MynameisBlarney

      Pinchy face!

    • dvlaries

      Hang on, sis. You’re loved more than you know.

    • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

      Obvs dreaming of murdered Marines

  • shastakoala
  • Aaron Wise

    Donny inspired dance tune.

    Don’t Kiss And Don’t Tell!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ipPmklBJ6Es

  • Serai 1

    Well, if we’re gonna dance…

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L7RRLC5slLo

    • shastakoala

      I have that album.

      • Serai 1

        You know, you can sing almost every one of their song simultaneously, and they fit together exactly. They’re all based on exactly the same beat structure.

  • Ezio

    Are we just going to ignore the fact that James Comey is probably going to walk into the Senate like this? https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/3dcef075194d9999c797780eb88cc386962fd9f7eca0ae19874e43e4e552e877.gif

    • Serai 1

      Ha, it’s exactly in sync with the song I posted just under it!

    • Michael R
      • LucindathePook

        Reminds me of a joke, whose punchline is “Can you rock me back and forth a little and break the suction?”

      • H0mer0

        she’s gonna regret that later.

        • Michael R

          he

          • H0mer0

            SPESHULLY he.

          • Persistent Demme

            Even worse!

  • Everrett Fanuelli
  • Sophia
  • BadKitty904
  • La forza del resistino

    Per the clip; we coulda had a preznit who knows how to laugh. Thanks PA, MI, WI.

    • Up In Smoke O’hontas

      They did disenfranchise enough folks in WI to have made the difference here. But I still submit my apologies on behalf of all the rural mouth breathers. Sorry, world!

    • Persistent Demme

      And while we’re at it…
      purity ponies, Russia, voter suppression, non-voters, the media (looking at you, NYT), etc.

  • IOnlyLikeCats

    True crime show: “There’s always two sides to the story!” Yeah, the sides are one person is a pedophile and the other was a victim. Do you… do you not understand how abuse works?

  • Me The People

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/right-turn/wp/2017/05/19/watching-the-downfall-of-a-generation-of-washington-republicans/?utm_term=.48b359462674

    “If the GOP is to survive at all after Trump, it most likely will need to
    turn to governors or ex-lawmakers who did not carry Trump’s water or
    attempt to defend the indefensible. I raise that now because it will
    reflect on the actions of Republicans on Capitol Hill for the next
    couple of years. Keep in mind how self-destructive their behavior is as
    you wince watching Capitol Hill Republicans flack for Trump, explain why
    ongoing possible violations of the emoluments clause are no big deal,
    brush off reckless disclosure of top-secret information to the Russians
    or refuse to chastise the president for cuddling up to dictators. As
    painful as it is to watch these performances, some satisfaction can be
    derived from knowing that these Republicans are doing incalculable
    damage to their ambition for future leadership in the party.”

    • Panika MCD

      there are hundreds of thousands of elected officials in this country and about half of them are Republicans. the author doesn’t think that there are about 200 of them that can be elected to Congress on, “when I say ‘small government’ I mean not getting in your bedroom, doctor’s office or date–and not letting Pootz in there either!”?

    • Persistent Demme

      I am hoarding vast quantities of popcorn, just for the viewing pleasure I will get from seeing the smoking ruins of once promising careers strewn across DC.

  • BadKitty904
  • Panika MCD

    got shifted to the House gallery today. they once again delayed SB2 (YAY!) and now they’ve been at SB8 (“putting the ‘fetal’ position back in funeral!”).

    this is, on its face really dumb. but when you realize its how things like SB2 and SB6 die, it makes a whole lot more sense. basically, to kill the Bathroom Bill and the State Credit Rating Suicide Bill, the GOP needed some red meat to throw at their voters. fetal funerals have already been ruled unconstitutional in federal court MANY TIMES! so it’s the perfect piece of red meat. they can look like they’re doing something awful and not be awful at the same time.

    but then I have to be over here the day of the debate and FUUUUUUUCK! EVERYONE IS ANNOYING! will post some anecdotes, but let’s start with:

    dressing up like a handmaid from The Handmaid’s Tale makes no sense as a protest to a TRAP law even if you’re not savvy enough to understand that this is never going to go into effect. you’re just showing me that you’re too lazy to read the book.

    • Up In Smoke O’hontas

      Ha! My thought exactly!

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Any chance he’ll be overcome with Acute Martyr Syndrome, demand a forced helicopter landing at Masada, and leap to his death?

    • Augustus

      Strictly speaking, I’m pretty positive there is a non-zero chance that that will occur.

    • not_vh

      more likely push somebody else to their death and claim martyrdom for himself. my copassenger died. can you believe what i must have gone through?

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        “I knew I never should have tried on that Trump mask and the stupid red tie with the scotch tape on the back!”

  • chascates
    • Serai 1

      Good gods, the spectacle of White House lawyers having to research the business of being White House lawyers… ARGH.

      • Up In Smoke O’hontas

        There’s always Wikipedia. That’s a solid citation in any brief!

  • Serai 1
    • violet moon

      LOVE this

  • violet moon

    I think we need a separate feed for video links.

    • Serai 1

      Why?

    • SisterArtemis

      If you haven’t set Disqus to “hide media” you should – the vids are overwhelming to the eyes and some OS without it.

      For the uninitiated, next to your avatar at the top of this (or any Disqus) discussion, there’s a drop down menu with the hide/show media option. When it’s set to “hide,” each picture or video link posted shows up with a clickable link to display it, then you can hide it again if you want. Good for controlling the length of threads, hiding gross Donald Trump nudies, and what have you.

      • jowgajen

        Discus is not really useable without this feature.

      • violet moon

        Ah ok. I was kind of joking but good to know!

  • janecita
  • chascates
    • Serai 1

      Source for all this?

    • RobKanC

      Good. Let him try.

    • BrendaKay

      The headlines should read: Trump is refusing to pay your insurance subsidy. He is breaking his promise to you to make health insurance better.

    • Persistent Demme

      Hold the line, Dems!
      This is all theirs.
      Make them own it!

    • Sophia

      Master negotiator at it again?

    • artem1s

      Hey, go for it. We got a special election in Montana next week and another in GA in another couple of weeks.

  • TootsStansbury

    I will dance lIke sprockets when the Darth Cheney goes with Roger A., the whole Tr*mp mistake is doing hard time, and the fucking Nazis are sent out of the world forever. But oh, how I will dance. I’m old, I work hard and am tired; but I would dance the night away and shout myself hoarse. And work the next day if need be.

  • Resistance Fighter Astraea
  • jesterpunk
  • Serai 1
    • Darlene Underdahl

      That’s going to play in my head while I sleep (I hope).

      • Serai 1

        I love ABBA. This one’s beautiful. It sounds exactly the way I felt dancing as a teenager. So much joy!

    • Sophia

      I love ABBA, Thanks

  • janecita
    • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

      He was soooooooo dreamy!

      • janecita

        He really was:-)

  • dvlaries
  • Résistance Land Shark Ω

    Every Wonkette must have the obligatory …

    Springtime For Hitler – The Producers 2005

  • jesuswasablack
  • chascates
    • TJ Barke

      SQUIRREL!

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Just when you thought Miss Lindsay couldn’t be any slimier a form a low vermin….

    • jowgajen

      If they can’t make their side look good then they have to make our side look bad.

    • jesterpunk

      Does Lindsay realize Hillary isnt president and he doesnt need to do this both sides are the same deflection bullshit?

    • Bemused

      Someone should explain to him what a meme is, and then explain that “but her emails” has become a meme implying Republican obliviousness. So that he is, in essence, a real life meme.

    • artem1s

      Oh FFS Lindsey, yes, she was communicating with the leader of the Democratic Party. And probably, I imagine, she was communicating with the president while she was SOS. IT IS NOT A CRIME FOR FEDERAL EMPLOYEES TO COMMUNICATE WITH THEIR CONSTITUENTS OR THEIR STAFF! IT’S ACTUALLY DEFINED AS PART OF THEIR JOB UNDER THE CONSTITUTION YOU ASSHAT! It’s called the right to petition the government.

  • Chadwells

    Good thing it was all Jared!

    “Trump’s $110 Billion Arms Deal With Saudi Arabia May Be Illegal”

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/saudi-arabia-arms-deal-trump_us_591f3322e4b094cdba53e3de

    • jesterpunk

      Wait the Trump administration do something illegal? Thats unpossible.

    • Paperless Tiger

      Do we have to give the money back, or will Trump stiff them like he did those contractors?

      • msanthropesmr

        Actually look for Trump to be a billionaire any day now.

      • Chadwells

        HAH! You know the answer!

    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      “But whyyyyyyyyy; aren’t Yemen people black?”

  • jesterpunk
  • MynameisBlarney

    Warning!
    Car pr0ns incoming!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7AZLu45nl5A

    • TJ Barke

      What kinda bourgeois hack are you?

    • Vecchioivan

      Let me guess: there are fools with $500,000?

      • MynameisBlarney

        A lot!

    • jesuswasablack

      500 grand for a v6?

    • h4rr4r

      It looks like a Lotus.
      At least Ford will have a halo car again.

    • Anna Elizabeth
      • MynameisBlarney
        • Anna Elizabeth

          Nice! :D

          • MynameisBlarney

            If I ever strike it rich, I’m getting one.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Then give me a ride, please. :)

          • MynameisBlarney

            Of course! At Pike’s Peak!

          • Anna Elizabeth

            AWE-sum!

    • MynameisBlarney

      Goawd…he needs to STFU and drive the fucking car already.

    • BrendaKay

      Spiffy! But my heart belongs to my yellow Mustang. First car I bought on my own… no longer have the car, but will always have the memories.

      • h4rr4r

        Which are better than any mustang.

      • MynameisBlarney

        I hear ya.
        My heart is torn betweenxt my ’65 Plymouth Sport Fury and my Eagle Talon TSI.

        • h4rr4r

          Talon. Mind you the best Mitsubishi of that era was the Mitsubishi 3000GT-VR4. I want one so bad, but the prices have gone nuts.

  • Serai 1
    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Sigh, today, guys have to look like bearded lumberjacks or Amish rejects.

      • Serai 1

        There are many ways in which I miss the 80’s.

    • artem1s

      gotta give Adam credit, he was there 2 decades before Depp. absolutely loved his cameo in Northern Exposure too

      • Serai 1

        As a teenager, I adored the Alfred Noyes poem, of course, so when Adam did that Highwayman thing, I was utterly hooked.

  • Lyly Sirivong

    https://youtu.be/XR4BP3SfPPs

    Something that’s super fun to dance to : Thai pop music !

  • jesuswasablack
  • Ezio
  • Ryan Denniston

    If Chump was cool, this is what he’d be feeling like.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBZs_Py-1_0

  • La forza del resistino

    Anthony ‘the Weiner’ cops to being pervy. Details of Huma’s and Hilz’ following conversation went unreported.

  • shastakoala
    • thebeatgoeson

      His videos make me so happy! Maybe we can all watch them on a continuous loop until the orange one goes away, one way or another…

    • Sophia

      Music & dancing it brings the world together. That gives me a happy.

  • Chadwells

    Tillerson is feeling left out apparently.

    “State Department denies release of Tillerson communication on Russia”

    http://www.cnn.com/2017/05/18/politics/tillerson-state-department-communication/index.html

    • msanthropesmr

      Did anyone ask? Or accuse?

      • jesterpunk

        Old Rexie feels left out because no one wants to talk to him.

        • Paperless Tiger

          The Russians do.

        • msanthropesmr

          Who?

          • jesterpunk

            He may be ignored more then Trump’s non Ivanka daughter.

        • Yr. Gma

          Maybe his wife will let him quit now.

          • jesterpunk

            Did she make him take the job so she doesn’t have to see him?

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        “Everybody’s getting prosecuted but me!”

        • msanthropesmr

          Why everybody always prosecuting me?

          • PigDootsMolloy

            He walks in the chamber cool and slow
            Cool ’cause the special counsel, daddy-o

      • Chadwells

        FOIA request by CNN….

    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      Tillerson is already in it up to his tailored ass.

  • dvlaries

    Let me cover you in velvet kisses,
    I’ll create a look just meant for you
    https://youtu.be/s3pbcFm1xpU

  • Kiri the Unicorn
    • not_vh

      american govardhana

    • Serai 1
      • snigsy

        No shit: my beloved crazy brother did that.

      • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

        Cows are apparently curious, social beings who will eagerly flock over to anything interesting. Los Angeles drivers do exactly the same thing if anything has happened anywhere over to the side of the freeway. I always think “moooo” as I’m caught in some stupid “looky-loo” jam.

        • Serai 1

          You know which jams I enjoy? The Mystery Jams. You know, the ones where you finally get up to the head of the thing and… nothing’s there. No sign of just why you spent the last twenty minutes listening to the radio. Good times!

          • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

            Oh I know! Apparently all it takes is either a former jam, which is still rippling backwards, or even just a small but critical mass of people slowing for no reason. I’m always in my car going “That? That’s all it was, folks? NOTHING?”

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenJugend
  • Ezio
    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Another genius gone too soon.

  • Serai 1
  • msanthropesmr

    So my theory is that Trump is so stupid that he thought that a president could do anything they wanted to do. Nothing more complex than that.

    • Chadwells

      I think that has moved from theory to fact…..a long time ago.

    • Michael R

      His idea of a ” great leader ” might require a slight paradigm shift .

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      My theory is that Trump is so stupid. No need to elaborate.

      • snigsy

        “Trump’s Razor”: the stupidest possible explanation is likely the correct explanation.

        • OddMan

          heuristic of Trumpian action . . . ‘Trump’s Razor‘ in honor of ‘Occam’s Razor’, the foundational mode of reasoning devised by the 14th century scholastic theologian William of Occam. According to Trump’s Razor: “ascertain the stupidest possible scenario that can be reconciled with the available facts” and that answer is likely correct.

          http://talkingpointsmemo.com/edblog/the-scythian-slice-of-trump-s-razor

          • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

            Why is it a razor, though? Especially with Trump, shouldn’t it be Trump’s Dullblade?

          • Diannelgates

            Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours & have longer with friends and family! !sz256c:
            On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. Follow this link for more information
            !sz256c:
            ➽➽
            ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialCashJobs546DigitalHelpGetPaid$97/Hour ★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫::::::!sz256c:….,……..

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          Occam on!

        • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

          Perfect!

      • OddMan
        • William

          Keith Richards seal of approval.

    • Paperless Tiger

      Was he too stupid to know he couldn’t make a deal with Russia re the election?

      • msanthropesmr

        I think so. It’s the only thin that I can think of that makes sense. He thought that ll of this was. Fine.

        • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

          I think he’s so, so, so stupid that when Vlado told him “not to worry, I take care of everything, you see,” he really did think he was fine, like the world operates exactly like in “The Godfather.”

          I also think Vlado has some deep, deep shit on him, shit that he’s so terrified of being revealed, that would be so soul-destroying to his pathetic, fragile, ego, that he’ll literally sell out an entire country and all its people to save his skin. My theories are:
          1. A video that includes a close up of his tiny, tiny micro-penis
          2. Evidence, real or concocted, that he murdered someone
          3. The threat from Russian mafia that they will happily murder him and his family, Ivanka first –while he watches (see: Soviet treatment of people they didn’t like), for not paying back the millions of rubles of debt he owes them, coupled with his bone-ignorant idiocy in believing Putin is “protecting” him in return for betraying us, as opposed to Putin having ordered the threat to begin with.

    • not_vh

      yup. he just thought everyone would rollover awed by his magnificence and the size of electoral college.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        “Is that the electoral college in your pocket, or are you just happy…”

    • ariel_gee_398

      He didn’t (and doesn’t) understand the difference between a president and a king.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Who wouldn’t get confused, laying around on all that fake gold Louis XIV furniture half your fucking life?

        • ariel_gee_398

          Fake gold is very corrupting. I put on a pair of gold shoes once and all of a sudden I was ordering the cats to fetch me drinks and the cakes I like or face the consequences…

          • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

            And the cats were all, “Really?” as they turned away with disinterest, snickering among themselves. (Dogs, on the other hand…..)

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            (….fetched a book, mixed a nice cocktail, and put on some Miles Davis).

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            You think that’s bad, you should try those freakin’ ruby slippers some time!

          • ariel_gee_398

            Who wouldn’t go mad with power?

    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      He got caught up in the right-wing hype. He actually thought Obama and Hillz were getting away with all those crimes, and figured he could too.

      • NotReallyHere

        This is also my theory.

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Laundering Russkie moneyz is stupid but even a slug knows it’s illegal.

    • snigsy

      Nobel Prize in political theory, folks.

    • Yr. Gma

      I am inclined to agree with you. His stupidity is breath taking.

    • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

      I completely agree with you. He thought it meant “boss of everybody, so there, nyah nyah” and ALSO thought it meant “EVERYONE WILL HAVE TO LIKE ME NOW.”

    • Bebecca

      And that explains why he comes out and tells the truth. If the president does it, it’s not illegal.

      • msanthropesmr

        Yep. I really do think he is that dumb. I’ve turned over all sorts of other explanation but that’s the only one that. Explains everything.

    • Red Bird Ω

      Yes. Even worse is the fact that many of his supporters also thought the same thing.

      • msanthropesmr

        This to the tenth power.

  • janecita
  • dvlaries

    And just who was that FalconPac?
    https://youtu.be/Z5TQhnDSx5A

  • janecita
    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Isn’t the hijab supposed to go up over your head?

      • Up In Smoke O’hontas

        Oh, it will. Eventually.
        * vomited in my own mouth there

        • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

          And you should feel bad.

          • Up In Smoke O’hontas

            And I do. Because I am a bad person. Who feels bad.

        • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

          You mean, when she slips off to visit Putie, of course.

    • ariel_gee_398

      In Melania’s defense, she’s probably dressing to minimize the risk of him grabbing her by the pussy.

      • CindyinEncinitas

        She looks absolutely ridiculous. I would fire the stylist.

        • janecita

          She really does.

    • Michael R
    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      What skirt?

      Oh.

    • OrdinaryJoe

      Jeezuz. They are richer than 99.99% of the people in the world and they dress like they shop at Target. In the basement sale racks.

      • janecita

        Her fake boobs really look super humongous in that outfit, so trashy.

        • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

          What’s fake about helium?

      • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

        Because he is a classless, brutish oaf, and she is a bare-knuckle-fighting whore from eastern europe.

        • OrdinaryJoe

          Oh ya. That.

    • Yr. Gma

      Is it a skirt or a whole dress? That waist is too high for a skirt, I think. It looks like an Empire waist dress. Is it leather?

      • Dazza

        I had one like that in 1971. I was eleven, and my Mum had picked it out.

      • janecita

        It’s a high waisted leather skirt, and a white shirt.

  • Dazza

    Dear Hillary (if you read Wonkette), I am very proud of the race you ran, and I hope you are too. If it helps, you have energised the women who watched you and now form part of the Resistance. We won’t forget ALL the work you have done over your career – especially how you never took a step back – but fought with obstructionist men toe to toe. The fight will go on, and we will match them drink for drink, argument for argument and meet insults with wit, grace (and curses in a language the m’f’ers don’t understand).

    We will have your back, girl, never fear.

    And BTW – we love how Putin was so terrified of you that he intervened to throw the race. Attagirl.

    • snigsy

      Well said, and thanks!

    • Paperless Tiger

      How nice would it be to advance at a stately pace on every front, from science to human rights, led by a wise, experienced woman and eminent statesman? Too bad the rust belt was more into chaos theory. They won that, bless their hearts.

    • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

      This is so beautiful. I wish you would screenshot it and tweet it to her!!

      • Dazza

        I am not on the Twitters, but feel free to do so if you are.

      • NotReallyHere

        Beautiful collaboration! Go Team Wonkette!

  • MarsNeedsWomen

    In times like these, I always listen to music that reminds me of better days…

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=orVsW-MkID8

  • Serai 1

    Seems cows are not the only ones who like to party!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZS_6-IwMPjM

    • OrdinaryJoe

      Probably a messicun ballena beluga. Build the wall !!

    • artem1s

      oh, he seem to really be enjoying it! :)

      • Serai 1

        There’s another video of a bagpiper playing for what I believe is the same whale. He’s a fan!

  • not_vh

    no idea why i love this. but i just love this.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L93-7vRfxNs

  • Ninja0980

    Sheesh, the hubby and I decided to be good sons and treat our moms to a road trip and all heck breaks lose while we’re gone.
    Fuck you Trump, fuck you very much.

  • OrdinaryJoe

    Where do I find the nut job blog?

    • Nounverb911

      Breitbart?

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Planter’s?

    • The Wanderer

      There’s nothing like a shorn scrotum. You should try it; it’s breathtaking.

    • violet moon

      Nuts r Us.

  • Nounverb911
  • Ezio
  • not_vh

    for when life just demands “no hoola hoopin or nothin” and when you have to let go a gurl to save the funk:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mmi60Bd4jSs

  • dvlaries

    You’re a bad bad habit that I should break

    don’t want to lose the love you make

    But you’re always in some kind of mess

    I never know what to expect

    https://youtu.be/MC2jd0CuiHs

  • Chadwells

    My final video. Enjoy.

    Zach Galifianakis – Can’t Tell Me Nothin’

    http://FunnyOrDie.com/m/e2h

    High Quality link: https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2vsiyv

  • Pinkham’s Law

    746 non-comments into a dance party . . . how bad is disqus broken?

    • not_vh

      ‘cmon its almost june. how much of this crap are supposed to take? in 5 months one night off we can’t have?

      • Pinkham’s Law

        Oh, it’s long overdue! Just . . . Safety first!
        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AjPau5QYtYs

        • not_vh

          i for one am enjoying this thread.i like people doing happy things despite circumstances.

          • Sophia

            It’s like a trip down memory lane with a lot of these. I’m loving it!

        • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

          True fact. This was our wedding song. But the literal version is better.

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yi7mBzdDHyY

  • The Wanderer
  • Ezio

    Sometimes when someone does or says something stupid I get this expression on my face where I look into an imaginary camera like on The Office.

  • CindyinEncinitas

    Let’s smoke jazz cigarettes and sip Campari.
    https://youtu.be/9lI8MojtIow

  • LarryHoudini

    Pretty sure a Rabbinical Dispensation for treason carries no weight with the Feds. Is this true???

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω
  • not_vh
  • Serai 1
  • WiscoJoe

    Just saw Alien: Covenant. It’s one of the most terrifying and fascinating movies I’ve ever seen. I’m literally still shaking with fear.

    [checks the news]

    OMG, can I just go back to watching Alien: Covenant? It was so much more comforting.

    • Serai 1

      Really? My. I’ll have to check it out, then.

    • TJ Barke

      Really? I heard it was shit.

      • WiscoJoe

        I don’t know what you heard and “shit” is subjective, but I personally loved it as much as I can love anything that terrified me to tears, fwiw. Not for everyone, that’s for sure.

        • TJ Barke

          That was from some pretty big alien fans, so I dunno.

          • WiscoJoe

            Yeah, it’s closer to Prometheus than the original films. Way better than Prometheus though.

    • Ferroequinologist Ron

      I’m hoping to catch it tomorrow or Sunday (woulda been tonight but I had a meeting.) My daughters and I adore the whole franchise, even the ones nobody else likes. ‘Terrifying’ sounds promising!

      • WiscoJoe

        Same here. I grew up watching the originals with my dad, so I’ve long had reoccurring nightmares about facehuggers and chestbursters. This was all those nightmares brought to life in stupendous fashion.

  • IOnlyLikeCats

    http://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-trump-mueller-idUSKCN18F2KK What. *lays down* what. *closes eyes* is Mars ready to be colonized yet?

    • TJ Barke

      We honestly probably won’t ever colonize space until we’re post biological, if that’s even a real possibility.

      • vivian

        Not too sure it will still be “us” at that point.

        • TJ Barke

          Just in a manner of speaking.

    • yyyaz

      I’ll go just to get the hell away from these traitors.

  • Sophia
  • Me The People

    Night folks. Pleasant dreams.

    https://youtu.be/dOad0FU9zF8

    • not_vh

      dreamy dreams and an eyeful of sleep.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      ‘Night! :)

  • dvlaries

    Leave us alone tonight
    then if it don’t work out right
    He’s all yours
    Until then!
    https://youtu.be/Dcn0ahCfVpI

  • MilwaukeeKent
  • Serai 1
  • Chadwells

    HAHA! Shots fired!

    “Venezuelan president hits back at Trump: ‘Get your pig hands out of here'”

    http://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/venezuelan-leader-trump-pig-hands-article-1.3178243

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    I gotta get drunk and I sure dread it….

  • Bobathonic
  • Serai 1

    I thought this was a party?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NqGslEZ5I6c

  • Al Swearengen

    Mellower dance music than what’s being posted.

    https://youtu.be/JBxreBgrJSA

  • MynameisBlarney
  • CripesAmighty

    If ya haven’t seen it, cracking Charlie Pierce-level piece by Erin Gloria Ryan in DB on how Anthony Wiener blew up the world with his junk: http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2017/05/19/why-we-should-feel-no-pity-for-anthony-weiner

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Wiener blew up the world with his junk

      And I’m still getting it out of my hair.

      • Lambsendbeds

        There’s not enough cream rinse in the world to dilute Weiner’s jizz.

  • oh my god i never thought i’d see hillary being fracking adorable.

    jesus what we missed.

    • Dazza

      I love the laughter. I hope she does a lot of that now, watching the Trump/GOP train wreck.

      • not_vh

        she laffs from her belly. child like. love it.

  • Chadwells

    One more for Friday night in LA.

    https://youtu.be/tyqoJpveQpU

  • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

    You guys! Ted Lieu liked one of my tweets! (it was about him but still!!!!)

    • Lambsendbeds

      Woo hoo! You’re a SUPERSTAR!!!

    • TJ Barke

      You’re tangentially famous!

      • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

        My life is now complete!

  • Anna Elizabeth
  • janecita

    My son and husband are camping, my daughter is watching anime, and I’m going to take a shower and binge watch “The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt.” Good night to all, keep on dancing!

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Did we say something wrong?

    • Anna Elizabeth

      ‘Night! Have fun, janecita :)

    • Sophia

      Night.

  • Nounverb911

    Has anyone noticed if Chris Christies sugared donut fingerprints are all over the Jared “Christie sent my daddy to prison” Kushners new troubles with the law?

    https://twitter.com/wildweezle/status/865727778901053440

    • artem1s

      ah, this is what I have been praying for ever and ever. The best sport is when the GOPers decide to feast on their own young.

    • that was the first thing i thought of when i heard the person of interest might be (pretty) jared.

      right now, it seems like the deep state and the establishment are winning bigly.

  • Nounverb911
  • not_vh

    after couple of hot & humid days, tonight is heaven. cool low humidity breeze. its like boston is celebrating his being out of country.

    • we had that here in chi (last night was so refreshing) – though i have to say, TODAY was 45 and rainy. i bike so i was back to mittens and it kinda sucked.

      we had a fire tonight.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        In Chicago? That doesn’t sound good.

  • Sophia
  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    News Update.

    Generalissimo Roger Ailes is still dead.

    You are now returned to your regularly scheduled snark.

    • TJ Barke

      Hallelujah!

    • artem1s

      as awful as McConnell stealing Garland’s seat might be, Gorsuch is a piker loser wanna compared to Scalia.

  • idiotboy

    Search Results
    Ry Cooder – Jesus On The Mainline – YouTube
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n2FrFBceLuY

  • Rachel Book Harlot
    • TJ Barke

      Yeah, sure he was a democrat.

      • Rachel Book Harlot

        I know, right? He’s a democrat the way I’m a millionaire.

        • TJ Barke

          And the way I’m an Olympic athlete.

  • artem1s

    https://youtu.be/LIreuaDVJdA
    Hillary’s real theme song

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω
  • BMW

    I don’t understand how anyone can still believe Trump wasn’t trying to interfere with the Russia investigation by firing Comey. This amount of self-delusion is absolutely mind-blowing.

    • Sheepshagger

      The aide said that guys like me were “in what we call the reality-based community,” which he defined as people who “believe that solutions emerge from your judicious study of discernible reality.” I nodded and murmured something about enlightenment principles and empiricism. He cut me off. “That’s not the way the world really works anymore.” He continued “We’re an empire now, and when we act, we create our own reality. And while you’re studying that reality—judiciously, as you will—we’ll act again, creating other new realities, which you can study too, and that’s how things will sort out. We’re history’s actors … and you, all of you, will be left to just study what we do

      • Dazza

        Will this alternate reality save him from a heart attack, or cancer? Or will empirically-based research – and inductive reasoning applied to clinical diagnosis – be his preference when he is admitted to hospital?

        Good grief, these guys talk such lamentable twaddle.

      • WeaselPoo

        That seems familiar…from the Dubya regime, is it not?

        • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

          Yep, IIRC, a New Yorker article…

    • Paperless Tiger

      I always find it easier to delude myself than a prosecutor.

    • Greyhame

      I don’t think it’d be too hard for those who are committed to the lie at this point. They just rationalize that the investigation was totally fake news in the first place, so obviously Comey got what he deserved.

  • Nounverb911

    Your tax dollars doing something useful for a change….

    https://twitter.com/uscapitol/status/865636516688609281

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      I’d pay extra taxes for this.

    • TJ Barke

      “Have we tried drilling for oil here yet?” -Republicans.

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Ima still hoping to start Ballroom classes this calendar year. :)

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xn_hRh8AGNk&list=PLgA_QpnjZQyy-jwORBJvUPBNj4_qJu2qE&index=10

    • Suse

      Something I’ve always wanted to do!

      • Anna Elizabeth

        There is a studio downtown, just a bus trip away. When things settle down and alls, I’ll take a look. :)

        • MississippiLefty

          Do it!!! If you’re doing it for yourself, go you. It is awesome and fun and good exercise, too. If you’re doing it with a partner, you’ll find that it is couples therapy without all the odious talking!

          • Anna Elizabeth

            xD Just me right now, but i’m fer shure looking forwards to it.

    • Incoming Ham

      Do it! I have been taking tango and took swing for awhile. Professional necessity but so much fun!

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Nice! :) I’m really looking forwards to it, and to meeting other people that like to dance.

    • Ferroequinologist Ron

      I looked into that once. I was enormously disappointed that the classroom didn’t look like this: http://wac.450f.edgecastcdn.net/80450F/wrrv.com/files/2015/01/102838224-630×419.jpg

      • Anna Elizabeth

        xD That could be fun with a partner….

  • Nounverb911
  • ariel_gee_398
    • Sheepshagger

      “Who leaked that Anderson?”

    • Suse

      lmao!

    • not_vh

      good lord jeffery!! this asshole again!!! recall that image of a gurl squirrel?

    • Incoming Ham

      I love the fact that the normal media has no more shits to give and is just “saying it like it is” like Cheeto Jesus does, except observant truth.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Pity they’re 6 months late.

        • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

          8 months late

    • Greyhame

      I think we all know the answer to that.

    • mark99k

      As if we needed another reason to love AC

  • Suse
  • Nounverb911
    • Ferroequinologist Ron

      Oh, FFS, enough is enough!
      – Ambassador‎ ‎Carlos Ortiz.

  • you guys! all this witchhunter attention has reminded me that mr fuflans and i considered ‘the last witchhunter’ but never saw it.

    anyone have any thoughts? it looks like it might be a fun mess?

    • WomanInThePersistence

      A movie? A job opening? An unsuccessful superhero?

      • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

        A floor wax? A dessert topping?

    • TJ Barke

      Supposedly based on Vin Diesel’s D&D character. That is not a joke.

  • Jennifer R

    Russian officials BRAGGING about being able to use Flynn to influence donnie. Per CNN.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    I am, as of approximately five hours ago, no longer in possession of a college student. 🎇🎆🌠🎇🎆🌠🎇🎆

    • IOnlyLikeCats

      What does that mean? Cong…ratulations?

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Don’t think of it as gaining a daughter. Think of it as losing a spare room.

    • not_vh

      congrats.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        :)

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Graduating, or stuffed in the trunk of the car?

      • IOnlyLikeCats

        Thrown into a river?

        • Carpe Vagenda

          See, nobody told me these were options. I should really do the reading.

          • snigsy

            Said every parent years later . . .

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Graduation? Or absent-mindedness?

      • IOnlyLikeCats

        I’m so glad I’m not the only one confused.

        • Carpe Vagenda

          Both, really. But mostly that first one.

          • WomanInThePersistence

            Well, molotov!

          • Carpe Vagenda

            We took her roommates and their families out to dinner, so the cocktail situation has been addressed.

          • WomanInThePersistence

            Seriously, congratulations! And I’m sure you are very proud of her. As you should be.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            Yep. She did good.

    • Nounverb911

      Is the ex-college student now an unemployed adult?

      • Carpe Vagenda

        The ex-college student got a part-time job last term.

        • Nounverb911

          Yeah team!

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Downsizing is so fashionable these days.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I’m nothing if not fashionable.

    • snark-lurker

      luuukeee. got a kid with 2 college deplomas, deans list x2, sittin on my couch or sleeping in ex-master bedroom right now

    • Yr. Gma

      Did anyone tell you about graduate school?

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I think she’s going to take a year off and get some experience first.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Molotov!
      Is this the Brag on Our Grads thread? Because I have two.
      My ex-college student, who left after two years with only a few credits short of her associates is finishing that and then reenrolling to pursue her bachelor’s. It took her only 6 years in the real world to determine what direction she wants go. She’s been supporting herself the whole time, working in restaurants, rising to the level of sous chef. This summer, she is managing as a chef traveling with a hiking camp for the fourth time. She helped the program overhaul their plans over the off season. I am so proud of her.
      My nephew graduates from St. John’s today. He finished his course work in December and has already been working for Amnesty International in NYC.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Oh, awesome! It’s always brag on grads day :)

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    Oh God. Irony’s children have all fallen dead, joining their pappy in the grave. And there are still morAns defending Cheetolini.

    https://twitter.com/FoxNews/status/865724449617825798

    • TJ Barke

      Well of course they are, MA, did you think we suddenly got transported to a rational world?

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Unfortunately, there are two places where no one gives a shit about any of this Trump/Russia flap: The vast stretches of American Dumbfuckistan, and the United States Congress.

    • Incoming Ham

      “People’s lives.” Really? It’s sliding off of Trump like mercury. The “People” are journalists and his voters.

    • Sophia
    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Man, that is a lot of Derp in that Twitter feed.

  • Anna Elizabeth
    • not_vh

      hey as a skinny freshman, i earned my first set of spurs by making a fool of myself on this very track. i got to do some serious roles after that and won quite a few medals for my college in several intra-collegiate fests after that.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Nice! :D

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      When my daughter was a toddler, she loved this song and would dance to it. But she also liked Tool and Pantera.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        I love Pantera. :)

  • Incoming Ham

    So Israel is Not Pleased that Cheeto Jesus may have put one of their operatives in jeopardy.

    Really?

    Someone should tell Tweeter in Chief that Actual People collect the information he is handing out like Halloween candy.

    • Jennifer R

      donnie the hutt doesn’t care at all.

      • Incoming Ham

        Not a wink.

    • WomanInThePersistence

      A) mossad is not famous for letting things go, and
      B) your name is almost painfully satirical.

      • Anna Rompage

        Didn’t they shoot down one of our jets in the 70s?

        I’m sure it was retribution for something…

        • WomanInThePersistence

          I don’t know. But I wouldn’t be surprised.

          • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

            Mossad agents were the ones who found Adolph Eichmann and brought him to justice, as well as maintaining a tiny country surrounded by its deadly enemies. They’re pretty awesome. And no, they didn’t shoot down our jets. That was Libya.

      • Incoming Ham

        B) You betcha.

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        True on both counts.

    • Sophia

      No one was supposed to know except the Russians

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      This man does not live in the same world as everyone else. He seems incapable of even seeing the consequences of action and decisions. How can you access risk if you only ever imagine positive outcomes? The comments after the Syrian bombing indicated that he had no idea that people would die. What? How can this asshat possibly be in charge of our men and women in the armed forces? His “speech” at the Coast Guard academy commencement indicated a disregard for the commitment those men and women were making to the nation. Oh well. Big woop. Fuck him hard, without KY.

      • Incoming Ham

        But yet his followers believe. Slate or someone sent a reporter up to a rusty town in northern NY state and talked to a bunch. “give him more time, ” “they aren’t being fair to him,” “the media is out to get him,” “look what he has accomplished so far!” “I want all the illegals gone.”

        He could walk up and shoot their grandmothers and they would say “Well, he was *really* aiming for some illegal messican but Gran was ready to go anyway.”

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      I agree with Woman In the Persistance, that I like your name. Is the Ham Hard As a Motherfucker? Cuz I like to go HAM too.

      • Incoming Ham

        Ha! Unfortunately no – it’s a theatrical term. Nothing that interesting.

        • Ω cynmac will never surrender

          Feel free to use interpretation, especially when commenting to Trolls.

  • Nounverb911
  • John Iwaniszek

    Hillary Clinton is a good looking woman.

    • WeaselPoo

      I’ll agree with that. And for me brains and poise and wit are “beer goggles” minus morning after regrets.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      And funny. She has an actual sense of humor as opposed to Trumps mean bullying

  • Nounverb911
    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      True, very true. But he’s a bully, a very aggressive bully and when bullies are threatened, this is how they act. Ex-h#2 was very much like this too.

  • chascates
    • Alt-dog

      “negligent indifference to the ethical issues”

      Uh, he’s a top ranking republican. You don’t get there by being ethical.

    • WeaselPoo

      Pence is just straight up cribbing from HBO’s “Veep”

    • Stulexington

      “I didn’t know about this thing that was publicly reported and that I received a letter from the House Oversight Committee about.”

      So you admit you handed out security clearance to someone without properly vetting them? Oh and while we’re on the subject, bullshit!

  • Picabo

    Help us Malcolm Nance! You’re our only hope.

    • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

      Obi-Wan KeNance-y

  • WomanInThePersistence

    Is it wrong that I keep refreshing the home page? Because I just know that something else awful is about to happen?

    • Paperless Tiger

      I almost wish they’d keep their subterfuge out of my face.

    • Anna Rompage

      We can only hope it’s so bad, that Saudi Arabia detains the Don, and locks him up forever…

      Saudi Arabia doesn’t have nukes do they?

      • Ferroequinologist Ron

        We could ask Mossad, but they’re kinda miffed at y’all right now.

    • Sophia

      It’s Friday night. Whatever happens can wait until Saturday morning. Lets dance

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N4d7Wp9kKjA

      • Anna Rompage

        And a happy dance at that!

        Just think, our disfunctional, belligerent parent is gone on vacation for a whole 9 days…

        https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6-9UoE48ilE

        • snigsy

          Yes, but soon sowing confusion and discord overseas. And likely dumb-fuck insults, too.

    • Pinkham’s Law

      The only articles currently in the works are the Top Ten and the Recipehub thing.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Thank you, but this week has left me a mite bit twitchy.

        • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

          And I believe you are talking about the comments, aren’t you, which are a non-stop cornucopia of horrible revelations from elsewhere on the internets…

          • WomanInThePersistence

            A little from column A, a little from column B.

    • snigsy

      Every day when I watch the news or read the latest tweet from the rage-king, I wish I could simply refresh the page in order to get back to reality. Remember those good ol’ times when words like “up” meant up? (I am beginning to think that I should simply barricade myself in my house and wait for the nice people from Merriam-Webster and the OED to kindly talk me out.)

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      I pray every night for everyone to just go to bed, just so it stops for 6 hours.

  • Anna Rompage
  • tehbaddr

    Touch my monkey, pet him. No, not like that! He’s a semi sentient little creature!

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      um, wut

  • btwbfdimho
    • Greyhame

      Party like it’s 1969?

    • Rachel Book Harlot

      I feel like there should be more beer belly and less teeth.

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenJugend
    • Yr. Gma

      “He could have stopped the Civil War.”

  • Bebecca

    OMG you guys I just realized how much more I drink since 11-9. We got Chinese takeout-hey it’s Friday!- and I’m still drinking sake two hours later. In little glasses.

    • snark-lurker

      chronic stoopid WH has that effect

    • MississippiLefty

      Little glasses don’t count.

    • Greyhame

      I was about to say, it picked a hell of a year to stop drinkin’.

    • Greyhame
  • Reximus

    Imagine the mood aboard BoneSpur One

    • Greyhame

      So that’s his Secret Service code name!

    • snark-lurker

      oh fuck

    • Rachel Book Harlot

      Melania must’ve taken quite a bit of xanax in order to be able to stand being in the same space with him for such a long period of time.

      • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

        Her Russian handlers ordered her to do it, or they’d take Barron. Even they are noticing that Trump is completely insane.

  • chascates
    • Persistent Demme

      Appointing Lieberman to the FBI is just the kind of thing that man-baby Trump would do just for spite.

      • chascates

        And then complain the Democrats turned on their own Senator.

  • Nounverb911
    • Ferroequinologist Ron

      If true? He’ll flip harder than Martina Navratilova.

  • btwbfdimho
    • Rachel Book Harlot

      I’m mesmerized by this. Particularly by the woman in the center. She looks like she’s almost levitating. Amazing.

    • Ωbjectifier

      Stunning.

  • Picabo

    Students at Notre Dame plan to take back their graduation from its horrible speaker—Mike Pence
    http://www.dailykos.com/stories/2017/5/19/1664136/-Students-at-Notre-Dame-plan-to-take-back-their-graduation-from-their-horrible-speaker-Mike-Pence

    • HazooToo

      Why do they keep going to colleges? Aren’t they always claiming those places are for Liberal Indoctrination?

  • btwbfdimho
    • snark-lurker

      brilliant, masterful

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      OK, I’m way to drunk for this gif to be happening. Plz mack it stahp

  • Shanzgood

    Fuck you Hulu and your ad for “Downward Dog” with the dog’s internal monologue talking about being worried about his female owner due to her lack of “self care” because she’s not shaving her legs.

    Did I say fuck you yet?

    FUCK YOU

    • WomanInThePersistence

      FWIW, my dog has no thoughts about my fuzzy legs. And fuck that.

      • snark-lurker

        2 dogs, a cat and a bird live in this house & not 1 is mine & none give a fuck about me

        • WomanInThePersistence

          My dog loves me. And could not care less about the furriness of my legs.

          • snark-lurker

            oh thsese critters love me alright (well not the bird) they just donut give a fuck cuz when one is hungry or thirsty or wants out or a belly rub i am the court of their last appeal so they always start with me(?duh?), work up the chain of command and then they’re back

    • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

      Seriously? Like a DOG would think anything other than “Why the hell is she shaving off her fur? You NEED that stuff.”

      • Shanzgood

        Meh, it was the (dog or not) message that “OMG SHE MUST BE BORDERLINE SUICIDAL IF SHE ISN’T SHAVING!!

        • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

          Yes of course! the fact that they picked, of all things, a naturally-fur-covered creature is even more ridiculous!

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Yeah, because dogs are so judgmental.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        They are famous for insisting that their humans conform to societal norms of physical beauty.

        Yes, sarcasm. Which I’m sure you noticed.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          If I’m not fashionable dressed, Mollywog refuses to acknowledge me.

          • WomanInThePersistence

            Thor is particularly annoyed when I don’t blend my foundation makeup well. He has standards.

    • Persistent Demme

      I had a dog that used to show great concern and lick my newly shaved legs as if they were cut or wounded, (and this was BEFORE I put lotion on).
      He was right.

  • Nounverb911

    So who is this ‘Later’ fellow that trump said he’s nominating to be FBI director?

  • Rachel Book Harlot
  • SayItWithWookies

    Hmm – Assmouth will be delivering a lecture about Islam in a country that takes its blasphemy laws very seriously. This might be the one time I’m ever thankful for theocracy

    • not_vh

      oh yeah. paragon of human values SA is.

    • WomanInThePersistence

      This is one speech that will leak out.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Can you imagine what we’d be hearing right now if Obama was in Saudi Arabia and JayZ was doing a “men’s only” concert to mark the occasion? Whole lotta instant Republican feminists, among other things.

    • jesterpunk

      Could you imagine if Beyoncé went too? They would lose their minds.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Beyonce’ is a man? Sheesh…and I’d thought I’d heard all the insane right wing theories.

        • jesterpunk

          No I mean if she went along like Ivanka or Melon are. To give a speech to women in Saudi Arabia. Sorry I should have been clearer.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            I KNOW! Check your snark setting on your computer. There may be a glitch.

    • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

      More like if Hillary was in Saudi Arabia with Lady Gaga and doing a “woman’s only” concert. Can you imagine?

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        I can’t imagine the reaction…either here or in Saudi Arabia.

    • ariel_gee_398

      My brother raised a pretty valid point – maybe Saudi Arabia’s repressive laws and gender norms really *do* protect women.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        You’ve mentioned some other tidbits about your brother that tend to make me doubt his judgement, but…

        • ariel_gee_398

          Other brother. And hey, if it keeps women from being exposed to Toby Keith’s music, at the very least we can say it’s not all bad.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            My bad, sorry. And yeah, I’d definitely opt for being stoned to death.

          • ariel_gee_398

            I think I may have accidentally seen Toby Keith in concert once, actually. One of the few concerts I’ve ever walked out on. In fact, maybe the only one. And I got dragged to a Meatloaf concert once.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            “I THINK I may have accidentally…”. The Trump administration is looking for “senior aide” positions right now. A change of atmosphere might be good for you.

            I saw the Grateful Dead one time. I got shanghaied into it; I would’ve left after the first song, but it was in Phoenix and I didn’t have a car and I would’ve ended up sitting in the parking lot for the 4 or 5 hours it took the stoned stumblebums on stage to finally get bored with their insufferable hippie noodling. Which still probably would’ve been preferable to remaining in the venue. And it was raining. One of the more degrading episodes of my life. I’ve hated tie-dye ever since.

          • ariel_gee_398

            It was some country type who had a song about 9/11 that my friend got free tickets to. Sounds like Toby Keith, but I wouldn’t swear to it.

            Teenage me would have been pretty jealous. I tried to get my parents to take me to a Dead show when I was 14 or so and they refused. Jerry died shortly thereafter and I held a grudge about it for years.

            That story did remind me of the time I went to see a show where someone decent was opening for John Mayer, so my friends and I got tickets, figuring we’d leave after the opener. We realized as we got there that we were going to be parked in and unable to leave until the show was over, but still opted to sit out in the car rather than see him.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            I commend your folks for their wisdom and superb parental skills. You’ll thank them for this some day.

            Actually, I was afraid I had offended you. There are a number of very good-hearted but otherwise slightly misguided Wonkers who are a tad…uh…deFENsive about their love of band. I was once taken to task and roughed up a bit for the following joke:
            Q. Where do you hide your valuables when Deadheads come visit?

            A: Under the soap.

          • ariel_gee_398

            I don’t know that there’s any band I’d really go to the mat like that for. Most of them have their shit periods or lousy songs or sell-out moments. Even bands/artists that I love and will forgive almost any sin from aren’t *perfect*.

            I’ve certainly moved on from my hippie/jam band phase. That said, I do still have a soft spot for some of their stuff, particularly the funk and soul adjacent stuff and their versions of traditional songs, which is probably not what most people think of when they think of their music.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Back during the punk wars, I had one of those really nice tie-dyed skull and roses shirts that I took and scrawled “I hate” in red paint above “the Grateful Dead”. I have pretty broad musical tastes-I actually both love traditional music and play a lot of it, believe it or not- and am not generally that much of a dick…something about the Dead and the whole scene brought out the cynic in me-partly because it was so easy to tweak the snouts of Deadheads- even though I confess to liking a couple of their songs. Just not “Friend Of The Devil”. I make a lot of fun of “Friend of the Devil”.

          • ariel_gee_398

            However bad you think the Dead version is, know that there is something worse out there. Mumford and Sons released a cover of it on a charity compilation album.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            I’ve actually kept a running tally of the worst versions I’ve ever heard. It’s a real busker/stoner standard for things like the annual street fair they have here…Mother of God. I actually wrote a country waltz about it….”the pedestrians reveled, they sang “Friend of the Devil”, then she left me staring vainly through the thick end of the glass”.

            Speaking of shitty music, I gotta head out for the night shift.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            You’ll be happy to know that no Grateful Dead songs were injured at our gig tonight.

            We played a benefit/memorial for a friend and member of the Tucson music community who passed away last month. I’m a soft touch when it comes to these things, but then was feeling a little grumbly about committing to play on my only day off. But it was such a nice vibe, I’m a bit ashamed of myself for that. His widow asked us to play “Will The Circle Be Unbroken”. We don’t actually know it and didn’t have a chance to rehearse it, but I called a key and counted it in, and one by one, various other players jumped onstage to sing a verse, or add some harmony. It ended up with the stage being jammed. It was a nice sendoff.

          • ariel_gee_398

            What would you have done if she had asked you to play Friend of the Devil?

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            I dunno, ms. buzzkill….how many angels can dance on the head of a pin? I probably would’ve said that I was really, really looking forward to it, but when I was trying to learn it, the puppy ate the chart. And the record. And my guitar.

          • ariel_gee_398

            Someone can always lend you a guitar. Better to go with a fake cast and claims of a broken hand.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            I like the cut of your jib. Maybe claim I injured it punching a Nazi…I can be both hero and lying coward at the same time. You should think about being my agent. It wouldn’t pay much.

            So, John Terry retired from Chelsea and football yesterday. For your own personal disgust, you should google it to see the astoundingly classless douchebag stunt he pulled in the match…a fitting end to his douchebag career, I guess. Contrast that to Bayern, where both Phillip Lamm and Xavi Alonso also hung up their cleats after distinguished careers, but managed to do so with dignity. Maybe google that too, for the fun of seeing the Bayern players chasing each around the pitch after the match trying to pour gigantic glasses of Paulaner on one another.

          • ariel_gee_398

            Low pay, low reward work? Sign me up.

            I saw the Terry thing. Just what I’d expect from a classless egomaniac. How that doesn’t count as spot fixing is beyond me, especially since people placed bets on a 26th minute substitution. I’d love the FA to dock them some points as a result, but they seem completely disinterested, of course.

            I did not, however, see the Bayern thing, though I knew Lahm and Alonso were retiring. I’ll definitely check it out.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            If by “low pay” you mean the occasional beer and cold pizza, then it’s a deal.

            From what I heard, it was actually Terry who came up with the idea and approached Sunderland to ask them to boot the ball out of bounds in the 26th minute. That’s some Trump level assholery right there. Sounds like everyone in England who isn’t a Chelsea fan is pretty baked about it.

          • ariel_gee_398

            Sorry, I only work for frequent beers.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Jesus, this younger generation of snowflakes… want it all now, unwilling to start at the bottom and work their way up. Get off my windblown patch of dirt that used to be my lawn before I spent everything to help Jr. through college!!

          • ariel_gee_398

            Some might consider that karmic retribution for wasting water on a lawn, of all fucking things, when my generation is going to be duking it out in the water wars.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Ouch! Hey, how are the terrorists going to win if we don’t all do our part?

            Fyi, it was a tiny patch of grass for a lovely child to play in an otherwise drip-irrigated xeriscaped yard. And I avoid contributing to tropical deforestation and third-world labor exploitation because I don’t drink coffee. Maybe the Eco Police in the Al Gore Brigade will take that into account. And I rarely bathe.

          • ariel_gee_398

            I think Michigan, Pennsylvania and Wisconsin have done enough to give them a head start.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Any vested interest in the Europa League final today? I’m more or less rooting for M.U., partly because of the bombing, partly because they’d qualify for Champions League next year, and I think it would be nice to see the P.L. become relevant once more in that tournament…the more teams the better. Perhaps by next season M.U. will have bought enough talent to be a respectable side again.

          • ariel_gee_398

            I’m for Ajax. Partially because I just hate Mourinho, but mostly because if they do win, they’ll jump ahead of Spurs in the Champions League rankings based on club coefficient, which increases Spurs chances of being drawn into a group of death for the the group stages.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Damn…you study up on this stuff, don’t you! The True Fan vs. the Dilettante. I defer to your judgement, though doesn’t today’s winner have to play their way in to qualify for C.L pool play? And are the draws not random? I’m fairly neutral…it wouldn’t be a bad thing for Dutch football to be relevant again either.

          • ariel_gee_398

            Normally they would enter the play-off rounds, but because both Real and Juve have won their respective domestic leagues, the Champions League winner will have already qualified on that basis, leaving the Champions League winner qualification spot open for the Europa League winner to make it straight into the group stages.

            The draws are random once teams are placed into pots, but the placement in pots is determined by how they qualified and, in most cases, their club coefficient. The exceptions are for domestic league winners, who end up in Pot 1, no matter their coefficient. That’s how Leicester ended up in Pot 1 and got a relatively favorable draw, which helped them make it pretty far in the tournament.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            I was told there would be no math! Thanks for cluing me in (although you’ll have to explain “club coefficient” to me). Now tell me-and be honest: Are you really that octopus that correctly predicts the outcomes of all the World Cups?

          • ariel_gee_398

            No, I’m just a lemur who helps Ladbrookes make their odds.

            Club coefficient is a ranking tool that looks at how well the clubs have performed in European competitions over the past 5 years, weighted for the overall performance of their national association clubs (that part is changing, though, I think).

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Whew! That’s a relief. I’ve had some bad experiences with octopi.

          • ariel_gee_398

            Who hasn’t? They’re all hands.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Will no one think of the calamari?

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            I recorded the match and scrolled through it when I got home. Pretty dull. Pogba scored off a crazy deflection. Mkhtaryan scored on a clever but unspectacular rebound. It never seemed it doubt. Pogba probably makes more than the entire Ajax starting eleven combined. Interesting comment of Pogba’s they reported: “I don’t want to be judged simply by the number of goals I score.” Yeah, really? I wouldn’t either if I were you.

          • ariel_gee_398

            At the risk of offending, if United’s performance was meant to show the spirit and resiliency of the city, well…. I’m glad if their victory meant something to the city, but it wasn’t a thriller. Ajax played pretty well but were let down by their play around the United box and finishing. That said, they’re a very young team and if they stick together I suspect they’ll be back in late stages of European competitions for the next few years.

            There was some ridiculous article in the Guardian the other day about the best players in various leagues based on some statistical algorithm. This wondrous calculation led to the inclusion of Pogba in the Premier League team and the exclusion of Ronaldo in La Liga’s team. I couldn’t find the article, but in looking for it I did come across this: https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/may/25/ivanka-trump-giorgio-chinaglia-saint-lazio-striker

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Jesus….the world “vulgarian” was invented for the Trumps.

            Ajax is a good side; my take was that M.U. won by brute force talent, no matter how inexpertly utilized..just better and more experienced at more positions. I can’t figure this team out…they seem to lack passion and purpose on the pitch, and a lack of coherent attacking strategy from the coach. Not without talent, but kind of aimless.

            People get so involved with these advanced metrics sometimes, they don’t trust their own lyin’ eyes watching a fucking match. Pogba has the goods to be a superstar, but he sure didn’t deliver this year; whether it’s the money and expectations, who knows? For me, same with Gareth Bale-formerly the highest transfer fee-for Real. Useful and occasionally brilliant, but generally underperforming (unless he’s wearing a Wales shirt). Ronaldo is not the player he was two years ago in terms of technical brilliance…he can’t terrorize defenders 1 v 1 like he used to. But as his physical skills decline, the cleverness of his off-ball runs, positioning, and intuitive nose for goal seem to have increased. I mean what, 8 goals in his last three C.L. matches? Won La Liga with a cobbled together lineup? Yeah, not quite Pogba-level alright….

          • ariel_gee_398

            I’m starting to think vulgarian is too kind. At the end of this all I suspect Trumpian may become its own insult.

            I think it’s all down to personalities of the team and the manager. Too often teams buy up players with no thought to how their personalities fit into the team ethic and manager’s strategy, so they are shoe-horned into systems that aren’t good fits for their skills, etc. United is the prime example of that, to my mind – talented players purchased willy nilly who aren’t part of a cohesive team.

            If you want to go stats for stats, I’d love to know how many points Pogba earned for United vs. Ronaldo for Madrid. I’m sure it’s not even close…

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            That is a problem with some of the bigger clubs, awash in money as they are Real did that for years; just buy every talented prospect out there, though under Zidane, they seem to have the functional team concept down, rather than a disconnected collection of superstars. it’s the problem with European club football…no parity, no real vertical movement in the leagues. Bayern, Barca and Real, Juve and Inter., they’re always going to get the best players, top to bottom, by far…the P.L. has a bit more drama, though Leicester was an anomaly. There’s occasional minor drama at the top-La Liga this year-and drama over relegation at the bottom for the hardcore fans, then about 15 average teams in the middle, happy to stay there. Hell of a way to run a league. For these big clubs, your really have to fuck up colossally, as Man. U. has for years now, to fall out of the top 2 or 3.

      • HazooToo

        I’m gonna go with “no”, but maybe you can explain the logic behind that, because it sounds like the same kind that created the avocado-latte.

        • House0fTheBlueLights

          You win this thread.

      • Shanzgood

        Wrong direction.

  • btwbfdimho
  • dvlaries
  • Anna Elizabeth
  • ken_kukec

    The way things are going, it’s only a matter of time until the Muscovite women of negotiable micturition come forward to finger (ew!) Trump.

    • TJ Barke

      Naw, Putin has almost certainly had them killed.

      • ken_kukec

        Nah, they’re too valuable as kompromat. Vlad’s plan was, anytime Trump threatened to get out of line, he’d send a diplomatic cable containing a polaroid of them, a container ship, and a nautical chart marking out the route from Petrograd to the Potomac.

        • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

          I seriously doubt that’s what Trump is so worried about. The video must show the actual size of his micro-micro-peen.

  • Miss Dill
  • Rachel Book Harlot
  • pussygrabber in chief

    I don’t know how exactly he’ll manage it, but I have a feeling that given the way things have been going for him, by the time he returns from his overseas clusterfuck, Trump will have us at war with Canada.

  • Picabo

    Mike Pence reminds me of Commissioner Blakelock in “The Gauntlet.” https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/1a06a693c8eb1b1cc91cb106688a3bcf1668c2db43562e5cd28106b4fdfccdf1.jpg

  • Pinkham’s Law

    Disqus is surprisingly functional. NEEDZ MOAR YOUTUBE!!!
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sfk0uMLhXqY

  • Michael R

    Remove some strings from your guitar and party like it’s 1978

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IANNHsYfxI&t=0m27s

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    Ok, bed time for me. Have fun with the dancing, you crazy kids.
    https://twitter.com/IfHillaryHad/status/865260349322178560

    • Pinkham’s Law

      sleep well! *waves*

    • not_vh

      night night. imma call it a week myself. good night.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      ‘Night, MA! :)

  • Pinkham’s Law
  • Anna Elizabeth
  • La forza del resistino

    Rachel lists 17 West Wingers going on Donald’s field trip to hold his hand.
    Weeks from his deathbed, FDR went to Yalta to conclude WWII with SoS Harry Hopkins, his daughter and a cloak. No mention if his dog, Fala, made the trip.

  • btwbfdimho
  • Résistance Land Shark Ω

    Some happy nice time for the dance party …

    Approval of President Trump drops to lowest since inauguration: Reuters/Ipsos poll

    The May 14-18 opinion poll found that 38 percent of adults approved of Trump while 56 percent disapproved. The remaining 6 percent had “mixed feelings.”

    Americans appear to have soured on Trump after a tumultuous week in the White House during which the president fought back a steady drumbeat of critical news reports that ramped up concerns about his administration’s ties to Russia.

    • brucej

      Count me amongst the “mixed feelings” crew :

      I’m torn between “vomituous fear”, “blind homicidal rage” and “irresistible urge to drink myself into oblivion”

      I tell yah making it though the first 110 days of Trump makes me feel like I just lived through the first 3/4ths of the entire GW Bush presidency.

      “Ok ok, FINE! I miss yah now asshole!”

  • Pinkham’s Law

    Dear God, we were ALL so young back then.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIgZ7gMze7A

    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      I wasn’t! 😔

      • Sophia

        Sure you were. Just think how young your heart felt compared to now.

  • Rachel Book Harlot
    • HazooToo

      Why, yes, I WOULD like to take a survey…

  • Sophia
    • Anna Elizabeth

      awwws!

    • Pinkham’s Law

      Now, THAT’S a helpful cat!

    • La forza del resistino

      Bad form. That sommelier is missing the silver cup on a chain around the neck.

    • Wild Cat

      My cinnamon Aby sips my craft beer. Hell, I think he’s so alcoholic, he would probably even sip Bud.

    • Ferroequinologist Ron

      My father used to make wine in the basement. (He was a weekend-and-evening alcoholic, so hardly a surprise.) One day a batch hadn’t quite finished fermenting when it was bottled, and all the corks popped, flooding the laundry room where he kept it. (Dark and surprisingly cool even with the dryer running.)
      Our cat Tigger decided to explore this interesting new smell, and started lapping up the wine. After a few minutes he came out of the room, staggering and stumbling and eventually just collapsed on the floor to sleep it off.
      The dog knew better. Then again, she liked to drink beer from my father’s big stein. A spaniel can drink FAST when she knows she’s about to be cut off.

  • dvlaries
  • Greyhame
  • HazooToo

    I COULD NOT STAY AWAY FOR LONG! I have missed you guys so much, I brought you the whitest thing I have ever seen to show you how much I love you. https://www.buzzfeed.com/juliareinstein/avolatte?bftw&utm_term=.uf7wwOLer#.ui333KEgy

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Yays! you’re back

      And WTF? Why would anyone want those?

      • HazooToo

        Hide them in unsuspecting places around the Oval Office and let them rot?

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Now, I can get behind this plan. :)

      • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

        Somebody said it’s hip and the lemmings leapt.

    • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre
    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Oh dear lord, warn a person.

    • Sophia

      Glad you showed up for the party!

      • HazooToo

        I feel MUCH better! Ready to dance!

    • Dazza

      Cheezus Melbourne – you are taking the bleeding edge cafe contest with Sydney to a whole new level of derp.

      Take a step back and think if this weaponised avocado latte thing is what the world needs in these difficult times.

      • HazooToo

        It’s not what the world needs. It’s what America deserves. Specifically, hidden under every heavy piece of furniture in the White House.

    • Notreelyhelping

      Dear Lord: please, no one tell Voodoo Donuts about this.

  • Rachel Book Harlot
    • La forza del resistino

      Again, we coulda had a preznit that had a personality that can laugh at oneself, but noooo.

      • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

        You mean “CACKLED”

        • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

          Hey! Mom used to cackle all the time. Heaven knows we needed the eggs.

        • Only the best people cackle. I know it’s why i do

    • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

      Thank you Ms. C.

  • Anna Elizabeth
  • Rachel Book Harlot
    • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

      Yes, but the ones I have known are all good witches.

  • btwbfdimho
  • Rachel Book Harlot
    • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

      At least she’s not wearing gloves.

  • Michael R
    • thank-you-thing

      Is funny because the whole thing could burn
      to the ground while he’s out

      • HazooToo

        Blame Canada.

        • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

          He already did.

    • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

      You never used an oven in your life.

  • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

    In case you didn’t know we’re fucked, we’re fucked.

    “Doomsday” Vault Flooded After Permafrost Melts Due To Climate Change

    http://www.iflscience.com/environment/doomsday-vault-flooded-after-permafrost-melts-due-to-climate-change/

    • Dazza

      Shit.

    • HazooToo

      Well, that’s only one of the last hopes for recreating potentially extinct plant-life following a nuclear apocalypse at risk of utter destruction…

      • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

        The vault and contents survived. Just the entryway flooded. But it caught the people in charge off-guard.

        • HazooToo

          Thank goodness! Hopefully they can take steps to protect it further, but it would help if we had a President who was willing to address reality.

          • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

            Well, luckily the Vault isn’t under his control. It’s a European project. Of course cutting down on global warming would help a bit.

          • HazooToo

            Exactly. I’m not sure if the Paris thing is enough, but it’s a step forward, and this asshole wants a full reverse.

          • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

            With India and Chine ahead of schedule to reduce greenhouse gases, it will leave us playing catch-up.

    • Greyhame

      That is seriously fucked up. Just gonna go have a laugh-cry for a bit.

    • TJ Barke

      Should have made it a solar powered ship or something…

      • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

        First storm or a freak wave and bye-bye. They just need to modify the vault to take 90º F weather at the Arctic Circle into account.

        • TJ Barke

          Depends on the construction of the vessel and the region it anchors in.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba
    • Sophia

      Shit

    • Courser_Resistance

      I read the article. The seeds are all safe. Just the tunnel leading into the vault was plumbing and they’re working to prevent it happening again. But yes, quite scary. That vault was sunk in the permafrost to keep it safe and now the permafrost is melting.

      • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

        They thought they were far enough north.

  • Picabo

    “Nevada becomes latest state to ban harmful ‘ex-gay therapy’ for minors”
    http://www.dailykos.com/stories/2017/5/18/1663823/-Nevada-becomes-latest-state-to-ban-harmful-ex-gay-therapy-for-minors

    • TJ Barke

      Until “President Pence”. Then it’ll be mandatory.

      • Rachel Book Harlot

        And President Pence will want to be personally involved by providing his own brand of gay therapy to a select few… (I’m still waiting for someone to out this mofo)

  • Sophia
  • jesterpunk
  • pussygrabber in chief

    This scene is very sexy. It is so.

    https://youtu.be/QgVPnWmUqd4

    • artem1s

      Yul Brenner was HOT!

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Saw him when he reprised this role on Broadway a while back – the man totally owned the house whenever he was on stage. It really was remarkable.

  • artem1s

    Lebron and the Cavs are up by 40 at the half. All is well in CLE
    https://media.tenor.co/images/a82d4dae70d0da80312c9f3fece04cb1/tenor.gif

    • idiotboy

      Looks like a repeat coming up. I will bet $40 Wonkette donation on the Warriors.
      Have a great weekend everyone.

      • artem1s

        I’ll donate some more whore diamonds to Ossoff if/when they sweep Boston. the finals are gonna be…interesting.

        • Stranded Devonian Lungfish

          Celtics libels!

    • data_ninja

      Defend The Land!

  • HazooToo
    • Picabo
      • Tokays_don’t_blink

        And why? I mean I’m not even a dude, but…owwww.

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      Hell, that’s just another Saturday night at my place!

    • Lamb Urgini

      How was you Mentos / Diet Coke enema ?

    • Anna Elizabeth

      To think Woody Harellson was funny when he was on Cheers. /jk

    • Sophia

      WTF? We missed you

      • HazooToo

        I will bring lots more WTF back to you guys, now that I’m all bright eyed and bushy tailed again!

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
  • Pinkham’s Law

    Ah! NOW disqus is acting like it should during a Danceparty!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NqGslEZ5I6c

    • Rachel Book Harlot

      I love this movie.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Never seen it.

        • Pinkham’s Law

          Musical about a town in Kansas where dancing is illegal, and how the kids convince the town council to overturn the ban. Much silliness, lots of really good dancing. Actually has some substance, but can easily be mindless fun, if you want.

        • Rachel Book Harlot

          No way! You need to watch it pronto! Just be aware that it’s a cheesy 80’s movie. :)

          • WomanInThePersistence

            I am aware of that. As a teenager in the 80s, I could hardly miss that. I’ve never seen it because I’m a contrary sort of person.

  • i’mjustaskingthequestion

    I am very suspicious of everything that is going down right now. Everything just seems to be falling into place if you want trump to fail (like I do). Everything just seems so…orchestrated. Meeting with russian gov’t officials at the white house on the same day as you fire the dude investigating the trump / ruskie conspiracy?? And then pose for pictures for fucks sake?!

    A plus B is not equalling C my friends. Just because I’m paranoid doesn’t mean they aren’t out to get me.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      So your theory is, “Trump could not be that stupid”?

      • Dazza

        Nah. He is.

      • Greyhame

        hold this beer

      • i’mjustaskingthequestion

        Yeah…I get you.

      • miss_grundy

        Oh, Dolt 45 CAN be that stupid……

    • HazooToo

      That’s why you should relax while you have the chance. Seize this relatively calm moment and squeeze every bit of peace out of it that you can!

    • jesterpunk

      They where not expecting anyone to record or publish pics of the meeting.

      • i’mjustaskingthequestion

        Com’on man! Why take the damn pictures then? Keepsakes for Vladdy? Big Red flag…

        • miss_grundy

          He only allowed the Russian press in the Oval Office. He demonstrated how stupid he was. I guess he is too stupid to realize that those “journalists” represented the Russian government and that those photos would be published in state-approved publications.

        • jesterpunk

          No one ever accused Trump of being smart, and he only agreed to the meeting because Vlad asked him to.

    • miss_grundy

      You need to realize how stupid this man truly is. The people who have worked for him and who have openly written about the experience say that he is a man with a very superficial knowledge of everything. And he is not ashamed of what he doesn’t know. He believes that he will bully his way through this the way he has bullied his way through everything in his life. And he thinks he can run the Oval Office the way he runs his company. And since he now has seven bankruptcies under his belt from his various enterprises, we know that he is lousy at running his business. Since he is an arrogant rat bastard grifter he cannot have the rug pulled out from under him fast enough and have the people who supported him made to look like the gullible tools they are.

  • HorseChestnut

    “consensus reality is the thing i miss most from childhood” – mrs chestnut

  • Ferroequinologist Ron

    Two nights in a row without His Lardiness saying or doing something newsworthy.
    It’s quiet. Too quiet.

    • Rick Hill

      New meds?

    • Thiazin Red

      Someone must have hidden his twitter phone.

    • Is Sessions hunting wabbits?

    • Dazza

      Jet lag. And lots of stair climbing on and off Air Force One. He’s exhausted.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Dazza

      We need effin’ proof, first.

      • Stulexington

        Well the preznut said it, doesn’t that make it law?

      • Rachel Book Harlot

        From what I gather from Maddow, this was written in the official record. But I could be wrong about that.

        • IOnlyLikeCats

          Not only that, but they didn’t deny it. They tried to “clarify” the comments.

        • Dazza

          Hoo boy. I shall look forward to this stuff appearing in the Congressional Record, and on the obstruction of justice charges.

          • IOnlyLikeCats

            You mean when we overthrow Republicans in a hundred years or so?

          • Dazza

            After the 2018 mid-terms.

          • Rachel Book Harlot

            Okay, I just rewinded that part (since initially I was cooking and only half listening. heh), and this is what Maddow said:

            “The official WH record of the President hosting the Russian foreign minister and the Russian ambassador last week in the oval office last week — the official WH record, not disputed by the WH — includes direct quote from the President telling these Russian officials thank God the pressure on him about Russia is lifted now because he fired the FBI director. ‘I just fired the head of the F.B.I. … I faced great pressure because of Russia. That’s taken off.’ Lots of subsequent headlines about this story, and discussion about this story today about this story have been focusing on the fact that the President is also quoted in this official WH account of that meeting, calling fired FBI director James Comey ‘crazy’, ‘a real nutjob.'”

      • Wild Cat

        We also need a non-corrupt congress, senate, military, supreme court, IC, and media to proceed.
        We also have to de-brainwash 150,000,000 racist fucking morons.
        No easy task.

      • Sophia

        I think that was in the actual call out from the meeting that was handed out to everyone in the WH.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Donut read the comments – the only thing worse than a Trumpanzee is a particularly stupid Trumpanzee who’s freaking out. They know what’s coming.

      • ltmcdies

        they also have it in for Kurt ever since he took one of their ilk to court for trying to induce a seizure (he’s epileptic) with a gif sent through the internets.

        they pollute his feed even in innocuous times.

    • Picabo

      Charles Manson was a better client than this idiot. At least he tried to plead insanity.

  • WeaselPoo

    My Foreign Visit Presidential To Do List (work in progress) :

    Saudi Arabia:
    Set up Miss Saudi Arabia Beauty Pageant Deal with Sheik Yabouti
    Make sand-trap joke

    Israel:
    Hug a Hassidim (photo-op)
    Offer to build bigger, better Wailing Wall—Palestinians will pay for it!

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    OK, which one of you good Wonkers did this?

    https://twitter.com/NaphiSoc/status/865722908923936768

    • It was me with only the power of my mind

      • not_vh

        not me. i’ve been catching up on music videos all night.

      • Turgid Love Skwerl

        Excellent! Now project a dick on the face of the Hoover Dam.

    • Greyhame

      gnome libelz

    • Sophia

      They’ve been having fun with this. I”m enjoying it.

  • dvlaries
  • HazooToo

    For those of us who dance funny

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NhjSzjoU7OQ

    • Thiazin Red

      THIS IS THE BEST ONE

  • Stulexington
  • La forza del resistino

    white people that can dance w/o looking awkward.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUslXuCNRi0

  • Dg Hacket
    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      Trump’s obvious bond with Flynn, like his relationship with Attorney
      General Jeff Sessions and other top advisers, appears rooted in the fact
      that they supported his then-longshot presidential campaign last year
      at a time when most Republicans were ostracizing him.

      Might explain why he loves the Russians as well. Fuck.

      • La forza del resistino

        Right out of the Cosa Nostra HR handbook.

      • miss_grundy

        Because it always has to be about him. It’s a shame we can’t get into a time machine back when his mom came to this country and we escort her on the next ship back to Scotland. It would have saved so many people so much hardship.

  • ltmcdies

    sssh guys…Patti Lapone has something to say

    https://twitter.com/ThomboyD/status/865742030885896192

    • Parakeetist

      Oh yeah

  • MynameisBlarney

    Sorry I faded out there.
    Got stuck in a cute animal video feedback loop.
    I almost didn’t make it out alive.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    And they do it all the fucking time FFS:

    https://twitter.com/kurteichenwald/status/865334454935584769

  • OrdinaryJoe

    I traded Carter Page and a traitor to be named later for Jared Kushner in my fantasy traitor league. Win bigly !!!!

  • btwbfdimho
  • Blackest Noobs

    OT:

    i know cats are finicky by nature..even with stuff they liked before..but tonight gave em something new and both of dove right into it. the boy kitty will pretty much eat anything. our way of bringing him home is opening a can…he hears that pop and pop he appears on the fence….the girl kitty much more finicky…she’ll lick it first…walk away…if she liked it…eat some or the rest.

    tonight she devoured her dinner. as if we never feed her.

    cats are nuts but nowhere as nutty as Prez Douche-Face Orange Scrotum.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    Posted earlier. And I will continue until everybody admits that these folks. Are. The. Best.

    https://youtu.be/dSAOV6XEjXA

    • Thiazin Red

      no arguments, that was pretty amazing.

    • data_ninja

      Two days worth of cardio in 3 minutes. Wow, that’s impressive stuff.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      You don’t see a lot of dances in those old movies where the women are as strong as the men.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        It’s pretty amazing.

  • Nounverb911
  • IdiokraticDrumpfenJugend

    http://www.cnn.com/2017/05/19/politics/donald-trump-foreign-trip-details/ Trump takes nearly everyone with him on his trip.

    • miss_grundy

      Grifters gotta grift. He may not have another chance to go on a foreign trip.

    • SnarkON

      Maybe the plane will go down on a snowy mountain and they’ll have to eat each other.

      • miss_grundy

        Is there enough ketchup on board????

      • data_ninja

        Bannon and Preibus seems to have a head start on that plan, between each other. Although Bannon has been eyeballing Jared as well.

        • Wee Mousie

          I was going to say, they’ve already served each other up for hors d’oeuvres on the plane.

  • miss_grundy

    Well, the news that Comey will testify at a public hearing before the committee investigating Russiagate has made my evening. It is a shame that it won’t happen until after Memorial Day weekend. Let’s see what Dolt 45 thinks of the ‘nut job” now.

  • Sophia
  • Panika MCD

    they’re done with the Fetal Funerals Bill. REPUBLICAN State Rep. Sarah Davis did an awesome talk about how dumb it was to pass it and then spend a bunch of money on defending it. but it’s fine. we’ll be fine.

    the really stupid part was when newbie Briscoe Cain wanted to add an amendment which would ban women who had elective abortions from donating the umbilical cord or placenta to scientific research and, when asked for a justification, said, “I just think abortion and everything that comes from it is a sin.” which led to a point of order and Cupcake had to pull down his amendment for being DOY!

    later, he was up in the gallery talking to some friends when Rep. Gutierrez was trying to attach an amendment to, you know, take care of the kiddies because “if you’re going to say you’re pro-life, BE pro-life” and when he got to universal pre-K, Pumpkin’s little buddy BOOOed it. because apparently taking care of children is also too a sin?

    anyhow, enjoy a picture of State Rep. Powder Puff.

    https://www.texasobserver.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/Briscoe-Cain.png

  • pussygrabber in chief

    Well, it’s a form of dancing. . . .

    https://youtu.be/gl4bRELFS7g?list=RDSDb4U6zYgg8

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • It nice they finally found That stuff about “laws” and “ethics”. Maybe someone should have a good long sit down with those

      • miss_grundy

        Well, don’t expect Dolt 45 to sit through a long lecture because he can only take very short bullet points and pictures.

        • Wee Mousie

          And his comprehension of it only remains in his memory for seven goldfish.

    • vivian

      Anyone with actual legal knowledge able to shed light on the probability of this being successful?

      • Steely_Fan

        The guy who wrote the special prosecutor rules just told Rachel that there is a possibility that, if the White House pursues this, Rosenstein could simply appoint a second special prosecutor to deal w/Kushner & Manafort and let Mueller continue to investigate everyone else. If so, and if the White House figures this out, mebbe they say “nevermind.”

        • vivian

          cool; thanks!

    • Dazza

      That’s why there are investigations still ongoing in the Senate and House.

    • Yr. Gma

      Of course they are.

  • Panika MCD

    I also too just had to do like 800 formal hearings which is why I didn’t have any other updates. I am now the “mommy” at work and it’s weird and I want to abort.

  • MynameisBlarney

    Every office needs one of these.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d2CTVqt2wxU

    • HazooToo

      I WANT TEN!!!

    • cheetojeebus

      I would get zero work done.

    • Wee Mousie

      If anyone asks, it’s a digital exerciser.

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Why is there a Baywatch movie coming out? Believe you me, I like women in swimsuits and all as much or moar than Anypony on the planet, but why?

    • Next month sometime. It looks deranged, but probably fun

      • Anna Elizabeth

        I only watched the show once, and that was way, way before Internet sexy videos were available. xD

    • miss_grundy

      Because it is a vehicle for Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson and Hollywood loves to revisit old stuff. And I saw Alien Covenant and it was fun.

      • jaspersdad

        How was McBride? It seemed an odd casting choice.

        • miss_grundy

          He was fine. He kind of plays a cowboy officer and he is the one who recognizes the signal that is being sent from the planet.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Cool! I <3 the Rock, but Ima pass on this. The trailer came up cos I was watching the trailers for "Dunkirk".

    • TJ Barke

      Because nostalgia/name recognition can mean big bucks.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Oh, I know. But SRSLY – you can see videos of hawt chicks in bikinis actually take off the bikini and screw, why would *anyone* pay for cheesy titillation?

        • Wee Mousie

          Because Jebus won’t let them go to a dirty movie.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I guess that is why, isn’t it? Pay to be titillated, and look down on those of us that are honest about enjoying adult entertainment.

    • data_ninja

      According to Futurama, they said that the Bay Watch movie was the first movie to be shot entirely in slow motion, and that Pamela Anderson won an Oscar for it.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        xD

      • Wee Mousie

        It’s actually 20 minutes of highlights (so to speak) from a 45 minute episode released as an hour and forty minute feature.

  • Picabo
  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • miss_grundy

      Welp, this is what happens when you elect a reality television celebrity who is an asshole to be president of a country. You get a narcissistic socio-psychopath grifter who has been able to get through life due to the services of cowering yes men and yes women.

    • Jamoche
      • Carpe Vagenda

        He wrote one of the smartest things I read about living in a post-9/11 world.

        “Wait, Aren’t You Scared?”

        Errr, no. And if you are, you frankly should be a little goddam embarrassed.

        No false bravado and it’s not that I don’t take terrorism seriously. I do, which I why I voted for the guy who believed in securing our ports and fighting terrorism with criminal investigation methods — which is, if we may remind everybody, how this particular plot was busted.

        I am just not going to wet my pants every time some guys get arrested in a terror plot. I will do my best to stay informed. I will support the necessary law enforcement agencies. I will take whatever reasonable precautions seem, um, reasonable. But I will not be terrorized. I assume that the terror-ists would like me to be terror-ized, as that is what is says on their nametag, rather than, say, wanting me to surrender to ennui or negative body image, and they’re just coming the long way around.

        Osama Bin Laden got everything on his Christmas list after 9/11 — US out of Saudi Arabia; the greatest military in the world over-extended, pinned down and distracted; the greatest proponent of democracy suddenly alienated from its allies; a US culture verily eager to destroy freedoms that little scumfuck could never even dream to touch himself — I would like to deny him the last little check on the clipboard, i.e. constant terror. I panic, they win. To coin a phrase, Osama Bin Laden can suck my insouciance…

    • Thiazin Red

      Shit are they burning him? Did they realize that he is too much of a moran to do their bidding?

  • Pinkham’s Law
  • ltmcdies

    Not all political news is a horror show…..here’s a cute as button baby
    https://twitter.com/RepSwalwell/status/865606244744142849

    • Rachel Book Harlot

      He looks just like his dad!

  • btwbfdimho
    • data_ninja

      “Okay guys, keep playing, but know that they will literally be dancing in front of your face. Just act cool. And piano guy, I hope that lid is made of some thick stuff, cuz it’s gonna get knicked up a bit..”

    • Thiazin Red

      Is this sequence from Stormy Weather? There is an unsane amount of talent in that movie.

    • Wee Mousie

      Totally different, but nonetheless fantastic dance sequence from “Hellzapoppin'” 1941.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSAOV6XEjXA

  • IOnlyLikeCats

    The numbing medication wore off and my arm is so sore.

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      Ouch…sorry to hear that!

      • IOnlyLikeCats

        Seriously considering shoving ice under the bandage.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Could you wrap ice in a baggie and hold it against the arm?

          • IOnlyLikeCats

            I can’t really feel anything through all the wrappings (they do it tightly for healing purposes)

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Ahh, I see. Then anything I can suggest is probably contraindicated. :(

          • IOnlyLikeCats

            It’s okay, the wrappings will come off this weekend (hopefully, but I’m not supposed to touch it and I might keep it on a little longer, just to make sure it has time to heal) and it’ll probably feel fine in a day or so.

            It’s definitely not as bad as my period cramps or my joint pain when I forget to take metformin.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            OK, good on that then. :)

          • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

            Metformin for joint pain? That’s a diabetes medication.

          • IOnlyLikeCats

            High blood sugar can cause joint inflammation, and mine was severe before my diabetes was being treated.

          • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

            Ah, never heard of that. I started weekly Bydureon injections. Got my A1C down to 5.5. I know it’s gone to hell, though. I seem to be eating myself to death, lately.

          • IOnlyLikeCats

            It’s the stress.

          • Yr. Gma

            A bag of frozen peas.

        • Sophia

          Frozen peas. The bag will conform to the shape and they stay cold forever. What happened to your arm?

          • IOnlyLikeCats

            Got a birth control implant today.

    • snark-lurker

      i been out what hoppened?!

  • La forza del resistino

    Hey MSNBC, don’t lose Lawrence. Hearing Rachel wrap her Friday show with ‘Now it’s time to go jail’ was not welcomed by anyone besides some homesick ex cons.

  • dvlaries
  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Certified Green Bastard

      Leak it all, leakers. Leak it like a pee hooker.

    • ltmcdies

      god, wouldn’t anyone…the man is a presidential nightmare

    • Yr. Gma

      Took us decades to find out who the original Deep Throat was.

      • Turgid Love Skwerl

        But only moments to figure out Derp Throat.

  • OrdinaryJoe

    I heard Trumpitin decided that they should have a dog, like prior presidents.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d9bca40dee592a689938d68a5471c870b3c8d865422793d58b151759fa5459b8.jpg

    • Wee Mousie

      If it has any self respect it will go for his throat by Wednesday.

  • jaspersdad
    • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

      One hell of a happy song. Love the fucking Kinks.

      • Thiazin Red

        The Kinks also have the best Christmas song ever.

        Arthur is also excellent, catchy, will make you cry, just great.

  • Juan de Fuca

    This teacher gets an A in my book:

    Barry White, Jr., a fifth grade English teacher at Ashley Park PreK-8 School in Charlotte, North Carolina, has an elaborate, personalized handshake with every one of his students. Every. Single. One.

    “They know when they get to the front door we do our ‘good mornings,’ and then it’s time to go,” White told ABC News of his enthusiastic greetings. “I’m always pumped up and then we start doing the moves and that brings them excitement and pumps them up for a high-energy class.”

    http://abcnews.go.com/Lifestyle/teacher-personalized-handshakes-students/story?id=45190825

    https://twitter.com/TakingFiveHQ/status/827361794695917568

    • SnarkON

      OK well that’s awesome.

    • HazooToo

      So freakin adorable!!!

    • La forza del resistino

      Too cool. Try dat Betsy DeVos if you want to relate.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
  • Picabo

    At this point it’s not a leak they need to worry about. It’s a pyroclastic flow.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cvjwt9nnwXY

    • Rachel Book Harlot

      Wow. That’s incredible.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨
    • Wee Mousie

      “Cover up!” Ah-ha! That’s the nasty impedimenta that took down Richard Milhous Nixon.

  • Anna Elizabeth
    • Yr. Gma

      Johnny Rivers! I loved him.

    • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

      You OK?

      • Anna Elizabeth

        I am, thank you. :) Been really better today, no triggers or depression.

        • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

          Glad to hear that. Let us know if you need anything. We got your back.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            ~hugs~ thank you. Wonketeers gave me some moneys yesterday, and it’s going to make a huge difference.

    • Sophia

      I remember this show running on TV. Sigh, I can’t bee that old. It must have been reruns.

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenJugend

    Breaking news: Roger Ailes still dead!

    • Sophia

      Did they stuff his mouth with garlic and drive a stake through his heart. Wait.. he didn’t have one

      • cheetojeebus

        Word is Murdoch keeps Ailes’ heart in a small box in the bottom drawer of his desk.

      • jesterpunk

        I think you have to salt and burn the bones to make sure the dead dont come back. At least thats what I learned from Supernatural.

    • Parakeetist

      Yay!

    • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

      Has he met Generalissimo Francisco Franco yet?

      • TJ Barke

        No, he’s boiling in a vat with Nixon for the next 100 million years.

        • Up In Smoke O’hontas

          Optimist.

    • dshwa

      I’m surprised. I would have thought Hell would have thrown him back by now.

    • ltmcdies

      and I’m still fine with it

  • ltmcdies

    when anchors have had ENOUGH….many apologies if this “vulgarity” has previously been posted

    https://twitter.com/yashar/status/865726614541402112

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Posted for any MRA/MGTOW trolls that Robyn’s earlier post might get (I haven’t had the chance to see if any of them are there now):

    https://twitter.com/Selena_Adera/status/865629234286297088

    • WomanInThePersistence