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Newt Gingrich with Callista, his third wife

It’s a good thing we have Cool Pope in here now because we are sending the Gingriches to the Vatican! (Assuming Callista gets past the ethics check, obviously.)

Now, it’s important to note that the Gingriches are Very Catholic. This came to happen because Mrs. Gingrich The Third sings professionally in a Catholic choir and Mr. Gingrich The Only went to Mass every week to see her sing and then obviously he converted, which presumably wiped the adultery slate clean. Otherwise it would seem a bit weird to send a woman who had an affair with a dude for years then married him to the Vatican who are notoriously a bit strict on this whole marriage thing, even with New Pope!

One assumes that His Most Frightening Of Combovers hasn’t heard that the Vatican is having a bit of a kerfuffle about the whole divorce thing and this might not be the most diplomatic of endorsements. Or maybe he has! Someone somewhere heard the man himself joking that sending Callista overseas would conveniently rid him of Newt as well, which is a canny move actually! Or maybe someone told Trump that the Vatican was a fan of nationalistic children’s literature!

It is never a bad time to remind everyone that Newt Gingrich was having a pretty flagrant affair all around DC while he was calling Bill Clinton unfit for office based on the strength of a blow job. And now the woman he was having the affair with gets to be an ambassador, wheee!

We here at Wonkette would like to remind you that it is never your fucking business who’s sleeping with whom, unless of course those people are trying to pass actual legislation based on people’s sexual behavior in which case LOLOLOLOL FUCK ALL THOSE BITCHES.

[NYT/CNN/RS/CNS/Wonkette]

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