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Morning Wonketariat! Here’s some of the things we may be talking about today.

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  • Nounverb911
    • BadKitty904

      Dude, are you stalking me or what?

      • snark-lurker

        nope i iz in portland last night & still iz…i think

    • snark-lurker

      would sumbuddy please move me coffee a little closer? I can’t move after last night.

    • DrBigHead

      I would give nearly anything to spend the day doing this.

    • sgt. jmk of the résistance
      • grindstone

        Existential cat — is that a tautology? or just a redundancy?

  • Nounverb911
    • FlemmishSpy

      Rosebutt

    • snark-lurker

      o-4 peatz sake

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Mind the pricks.

      • From Russia with Love

        Porkers.

    • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

      PUT THEM IN MAH BELLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Msgr_MΩment

    regular gibbons >> shitgibbons

  • Nounverb911

    Afghanistan? Again?
    https://youtu.be/CNo0BicRM8k

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    The Talibangelical crowd at the Air Force Academy getting A Gay is just about the funniest thing to happen in months.

    • TundraGrifter

      Tailhook 2.0.

      • snark-lurker

        navy libull

    • From Russia with Love

      She might just fix that hell hole. It’s not like their major problem was consensual sex going on…

  • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

    Weird fact that I never, ever in 20 million years have guessed. Phoenix (arguably the most racist pile of shit of a city I have ever visited, and I lived in Florida) has a black woman as Police Chief.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      “Suh? I say, suh? Columbia has a bone to pick with you.”

    • John Thorstensen

      Well, Milwaukee has a black police chief, too, but he’s a right-wing lunatic.

      I think his grandpappy must have been a Schwarzkommando.

    • Crystalclear12

      Ferguson libel!!!!

    • CogitoErgoBibo

      I’m as shocked about the “woman” part as I am about the “black” part.

      • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

        IKR????

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      The demographics within the actual Phoenix city limits have changed radically in the last few years. Much more diverse and liberal and probably Dem majority. It’s the surrounding burbs that are right wing shitholes.

    • Opalescent Riddles

      In God’s image.

  • La forza del resistino

    The Ft Worth gibbons have no problem with GoPro cams once their agent works out the residuals payout.

  • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

    Afghanistan has been the Grave of Empire since what, Alexander the Great? Why shouldn’t our benighted failure of a country end by re-stabbing that wound?

    Fuckin’ Go For It, Drumpf! Get Some! Thousand more human beings slaughtered, maimed, or left with PTSD just make your needle-dick feel semi-hard again! DO IT, Daughterfucker!

    • Nounverb911

      OT
      Are you sitting down? Interesting rumors are flying!

      https://twitter.com/ThisisF1/status/861878839219073025

      • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

        Oh well. I’ll still like Sebastian, and I’ll root for whomever wears a Prancing Pony. :)

      • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

        Also too, Niki Lauda always makes my smile. I myself would consider working for Mercedes just to work with Niki. :)

      • DrBigHead

        There is a group that is trying to build a Formula 1 track outside of Tucson. Not sure where that stands, but I guarantee I would go. May not be Monaco, but F1 is F1 after all.

  • Nounverb911

    Are these gibbons related to Euell Gibbons?
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_XJMIu18I8Y

    • BadKitty904

      Wth???

    • sgt. jmk of the résistance

      It’s been a while since I heard him say wild hickory nuts… ahhhh, nostalgia!

    • chortlingdingo

      Confession: I actually love Grape Nuts. I grew up eating them with a spoonful of white sugar mixed in to sweeten them up, so they’re a comfort food for me.

  • Mpeg

    For a full grown curiosity-filled primate, that flibbertigibbon seems to have lost his tongue!

  • La forza del resistino

    When it comes to the AFA commander kerfuffle, I would say when my fighter jet is on the fritz, my first call is to a lesbian. They can fix anything.

    • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

      And they rarely use duct tape or bailing wire.

      • From Russia with Love

        No, but they do have this stuff called 500MPH tape. Guess what it’s good for?

        • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

          Everything? How did I not know about this magical item?

          • From Russia with Love

            You could hold side panels on and fly with it if the fasteners were stripped and you were far from home.

        • Suttree

          Shutting Rush up?

          • From Russia with Love

            No, that’s 800MPH tape.

        • Contemplative Ron

          Fixing ducts?

        • aureolaborealis

          Removing the outer layer of whatever you put it on when you take it off?

    • From Russia with Love

      Lesbian or not, there were some amazing women bending wrenches out on the flightline back in the day. I suppose there still are.

  • Crystalclear12

    You know in SciFi movies when the bad guys figure out the good guys have a plan so they start bombing shit in a desperate attempt to win?

    Yeah, I am getting that vibe from the GOP.

    • BadKitty904

      Here’s hoping.

      • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

        The casualties will make the Civil War look like a Tea Dance

        • When is this going to start? Because right now, it looks to me like the repububs and the bros and the alt right and the trumpelskins are winning all the things and we are losing all the things.

          • Yr. Gma

            Trajectory for Donnie is downward. It’s not gonna happen quickly.

    • UncleTravelingMatt
    • sgt. jmk of the résistance

      They do seem a little sweaty these days, don’t they?

  • therblig

    here in JC, the canada geese that nest around the waterfront have new little ones. requires a little extra care in driving, but they’re so damn cute…

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/c90842401b7c832a26c7e9252d1e1604877d5a0d67abbe62a0ac8eb28e2c8344.jpg

    • From Russia with Love

      Those Canadian geese shit on EVERYTHING!

  • From Russia with Love

    “The Family Research Council is full religious butthurt because the Senate might appoint Kristin Goodwin to be the first openly gay commandant of the U.S. Air Force Academy.”

    Ah ha ha ha ha. Suck it, Focus on the Family!

    BTW, focus on your own fucking fambly.

    • John Thorstensen

      The Air Force Academy has at times been a horrible hotbed of far-right Christian fundamentalism.

      I guess they know who has the actual power to bring on Armageddon.

      • From Russia with Love

        They didn’t name that town Jesus Springs for nothing.

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      I used to know a guy, an officer at SPACECOM, I made the mistake of asking if he graduated AFA, and he said “no, I wanted an education”. XD And this guy, a Captain at the time, was so Christian he was studying Ancient Greek so he could do an analyses of the Bible.

      Cute, too, even. :)

      • From Russia with Love

        I didn’t attend, but AF academy grads contend it is a $50,000 education, shoved up your ass a nickel at a time.

        • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

          XD What can I say? I wanted to go to Annapolis.

  • BadKitty904
  • Nounverb911

    Why is Jerry Rivers sitting in the spousal abusers section at Citi Field?
    https://twitter.com/GeraldoRivera/status/861767668805906432

    • h4rr4r

      Looking for Hoffa?

      • Nounverb911

        He’s under the Meadowlands….

    • La forza del resistino

      Again, who dafuq wears a necktie to the ballyard?

    • Suttree

      How are they not covered in beer and popcorn at a Mets game?

    • Chadwells

      Bandwagon piece of garbage with a stupid fucking mustache. Cool photo, Douchebag sexual predators.

    • sgt. jmk of the résistance

      STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY TEAM, YOU TWO MORANS!!!!

  • The Librarian

    Watch out boys and girls! In Clownface McFuckstick’s calvacade of horrors, McConnell has the exterior of Bozo with the soul of Pennywise…..

  • Nounverb911

    I read on the internets that Rupert is taking French lessons.
    https://twitter.com/jonfavs/status/861590457524011009

    • Claire

      I read elsewhere that it was also a hilarious example of alt-right trolls completely failing to understand that France is in Not-America and not, say, a suburb of Wyoming.

      ALT-RIGHT: Omg let’s do memes saying Macron is doing his stepdaughter!
      FRENCH ALT-RIGHT: This is France, guys, literally no one cares.

      ALT-RIGHT: *racist, anti-semitic rants*
      FRENCH ALT-RIGHT: Ew. Are you literally covered in Cheetos and sitting in your mom’s basement? Because we thought that was just a joke.

      ALT-RIGHT: Let’s do memes! But we don’t speak that weird language over there so let’s do them in English! And put frogs in them!
      FRENCH ALT-RIGHT: You know how you mention Americans to Parisians and they get this blank look on their faces and go “Mais les Americains, ils sont cons”? This is why.

      • Shanzgood

        Yeah, you also don’t want to send frog memes to the French.

        • Opalescent Riddles

          I know, right? Audience awareness much?

        • Claire

          Knowing that requires actually learning something about another culture or history or all those things that the alt-right thinks are beneath them. The good news is that the attempts of the American alt-right to undermine elections in Not-America are pretty much doomed by the cultural ignorance they proudly refuse to correct.

      • aureolaborealis

        Google Bowdlerizes that to “But the Americans, they are idiots.”

    • An Outhouse for the Resistance

      Yeah, they don’t have the fucking NY times lack of self awareness, Clinton hatred, and editorializing on John Podesta’s ricotta recipe either.

  • TheGrandWazoo2

    This should work out great. First, no one will be able to afford health insurance individually, bad for insurers. Second, if employers will no longer be obligated to provide insurance and they choose to do so, it will collapse that part of the insurance industry. Third, if the insurance industry collapses there won’t be any money to pay hospitals, doctors, pharma, etc. and the entire health care industry collapses. Then the government will be forced to come in and take it over and the lunatics will get exactly what they didn’t want, government run health care, probably with extra death panels considering the people now in charge.

    Good times, good times.

    • Nounverb911

      Trickle down healthcare?

    • bupkus231

      Unfortunately, some on the “extreme left” seem to believe that that’s the only way to get single-payer…

      At least, that’s what I’ve heard.

      • VirginiaLady

        Move to Canada?

        • Contemplative Ron

          Our population Up Here is about to double or triple, isn’t it?

          • VirginiaLady

            I call dibs on your guest room. Please stock up the minifridge with beer!

          • aureolaborealis

            Also, get Trudeau on the phone, and have him expedite the legal weed.

    • artem1s

      you forgot the chickens. what are doctors going to do with all those chickens? the AMA is just beginning to realize how badly doctors are likely to get fucked by this bill. Too bad they killed the goose that laid the golden egg.

      • H0mer0

        The insurance companies have already fucked me over as United Healthcare was paying less than Virginia Medicaid. I just found out I made much less than a port authority cop posting misogynist crap on Facebook (I never joined the AMA)

    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      Don’t forget; one business offers health insurance, and it’s competitor doesn’t, the first business’s bottom line is affected, causing layoffs and potential bankruptcy.

    • grindstone

      That’s so crazy it just might work! Of course, we, and everyone we love, will be dead as kelsey’s nuts, but the plan is genius!

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    George Will: Continuing the robust Republican tradition of failing upwards. Too old and lame even for Fox. The classic “who could’ve anticipated that 30 years of Republican race-baiting, misogyny, and hatred could’ve paved the way for Trump?” apologist. Fuck that asshole.

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      I wonder if the loathesome old twat will spin his worthless paens about Major League Baseball on MSNBC?

      I shall nevers know, because I stopped watching MSNBC over 2 years ago. Chris Matthews was awful enough.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        As Janecita pointed out, they hire this irrelevant old white pants-pisser and confine the brilliant and dynamic Joy Reid to weekend early mornings. How progressive!

        • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

          Yup. MSNBC is just Faux Lite, all the Bullshit propaganda, and less filling. Fuck them.

    • The Wanderer

      They haven’t hired Pat Buchanan again, yet.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Pat’s open white supremacism finally got to be too much for them. Took ’em a while, though.

  • Nounverb911
    • CogitoErgoBibo

      Sooo gross. I have a friend who collects colorful cookbooks from the 1950s and 1960s. I can’t believe some of the things they used to suspend in Jell-O.

      • DrBigHead

        I have a recipe for a horseradish aspic. Even have one of my grandmother’s fish-shaped molds earmarked for it. Can’t muster the courage to try it though, because I am reasonably confident it will end up in the trash.

        • CogitoErgoBibo

          Which is a waste of food and a tragedy. But the picture alone might be worth it.

          • From Russia with Love

            Good horseradish should be saved for cocktail sauce and bloody Marys.

          • CogitoErgoBibo

            I tend to concur.

          • h4rr4r

            BEEF ON WECK!

          • DrBigHead

            I have had a horseradish sauce on roasted beets. The heat and the sweet complement each other well

          • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

            And Prime Rib!

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            Good horseradish is good on everything. I consume Horseradish the way others use Mayonnaise.

          • sgt. jmk of the résistance

            Also too, added to plain yogurt with snipped fresh dill and a lot of mustard for a yummy dip.

            This is the stuff I use… they make it just down the road from me:

            https://purewows3.imgix.net/images/articles/2016_08/horseradish.png?auto=format,compress&cs=strip

        • cmd resistor

          I remember the French Chef talking about aspic but otherwise have not experienced it.

          • DrBigHead

            Think of a snooty meat-based jello.

          • cmd resistor

            Last time I had to do a colonoscopy I tried just plain jello for the illusion of solid food, and I STILL couldn’t stand it. Meat-based and snooty probably wouldn’t help. Ugh.

          • DrBigHead

            Having grown up in the Midwest during the 60’s, canned fruit cocktail in jello has an almost Proustian effect on me. Especially if topped with Cool Whip

      • Contemplative Ron

        Habeas corpus?

    • h4rr4r

      WTF is this shit?
      I know old weird recipes are a thing, but come on. That is just bananas, low grade ham and packaged sauce. That is not food.

      • NastyBossetti

        It’s a quick and easy 3-ingredient brunch recipe for busy moms who want to make sure they never have to host anyone in their home ever again.

        • h4rr4r

          Is busy code for hammered?

          • NastyBossetti

            In this case, it’s code for “tired of everyone’s shit and all out of fucks to give.” So, yeah, possibly hammered as well.

        • artem1s

          make sure they never have to host anyone in their home ever again.
          well that should do it.

      • H0mer0

        I thought processed cheese was called “cheese food.”

        • h4rr4r

          No, those are different things.

          There are government standards on what each of those items can contain.

    • h4rr4r

      How hammered were the housewives that made this?

    • Red Bird Ω

      Those poor bananas.

    • DrBigHead

      I Imagine a lot of cooking sherry was consumed

      • ariel_gee_398

        And then regurgitated when people ate the bananas and ham smothered in egg yolk and butter sauce.

        • h4rr4r

          No egg yolks, it calls for packaged sauce mix! ugg.

          • ariel_gee_398

            Oh, those usually still have egg in them. Dehydrated, powdered egg yolk. NASA eggs.

          • Shanzgood

            Served with Tang.

          • h4rr4r

            Tang is very popular.

            Oh, you meant the children’s drink.

          • Shanzgood

            That’s why I capitalized it.

            But I guess the other is That Popular after all.

    • cmd resistor

      That reminds me of the gross jello based recipes that pop up now and again. I’m not just talking about random fruit cocktail floating in jello, either.

      • Shanzgood

        My Mormon grandma made that kind of stuff. I guess it was hard to mess up. She was as famously bad at cooking as her husband was at being good at it.

        • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

          Not to be mean, but Mormon and Baptist ladies brought a lot of foods over when Dad passed. It ranged from hideous to inedible.

          I tried to remember that the thought counts, but in the name of all that is reasonable, how do you fuck up sweet rolls?

          • Shanzgood

            Did they put shredded carrots in them? Grandma’s weird shit always had shredded carrots. And mini-marshmallows.

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            Mini-marshmallows, Aye. I think there was shredded carrot salad, with raisins or some semi-identifiable masses.

          • Yr. Gma

            My aunt made a concoction with lime jello, jicama, avocado and bean sprouts. I lie not.

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            Uhhggg :p

          • aureolaborealis

            Aren’t the shredded carrots there to remind you of Original Sin? So you can’t just relax and enjoy the jello?

          • Shanzgood

            Who enjoys jello?

          • aureolaborealis

            People who know the difference between right and wrong enjoy jello, that’s who.

          • Shanzgood

            Well I know jello is wrong so…I enjoy jello?

            Wait, this isn’t working the way I thought it would.

          • Yr. Gma

            My ten-year-old grandson.

          • Shanzgood

            Well, for him it’s still a toy.

          • SweetDeeKat

            You put goopy orange icing on them, sez this lady who is allergic to orange.

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            Ewww. Yeah, they had that too.

      • chortlingdingo

        Don’t forget the bucketloads of mayonnaise to go along with it.

      • Doug Langley

        Fruit cocktail jello was Mom’s idea of fruits and veggies.

        • aureolaborealis

          Also the RDA of beef knuckle!

    • Courser_Resistance

      For all that is holy, fuck NO!

    • vivian

      I’m beginning to understand why there has been an uptick in rates of autism.

    • Pinkham’s Law

      *twitches violently*

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Can’t Un See

    • Contemplative Ron

      McCalls, eh? That actually looks like something Kraft would have promoted in their ads back in the 60s. Combinations of things that would make your hair stand on end just HEARING, never mind actually making and eating.

    • An Outhouse for the Resistance

      Lindsey Graham dreams for the time when America was great like that.

    • The Wanderer
  • Nounverb911
    • CogitoErgoBibo

      Ted? Consider your ass righteously kicked.

    • DrBigHead

      Absolutely worth the price of admission.

    • Shanzgood

      BURN that mansplaining fuckstuck!

    • aureolaborealis

      I know I will enjoy it, but I can’t click on anything that shows Ted Cruz using his mouthparts.

      • Yr. Gma

        I know. The sound of his voice. Makes me cringe.

  • Ghenghis McCann

    Bill Clinton and James Patterson are writing a novel called “The President Is Missing”.
    Spoiler Alert: He’s at Mar-A-Lago.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Spoiler Alert correction- he’s writing his memoirs in the south seas and funding jobs for Chicago teens.

    • sgt. jmk of the résistance

      Nah. She’s on a speaking tour, gearing up the Resistance.

  • Michael Smith
    • Ghenghis McCann

      “Plus ca change…” as President- elect Macron would say.

    • From Russia with Love

      “I am not a daughter fucker.”

      Ooops, wrong pretzeldent.

    • Doug Langley

      The more things change . . .

    • Yr. Gma

      I remember it well. Drip, drip, drip.

  • Spurning Beer

    I don’t mean to be a schoolmarm about it, Dominic, but the word is “INPEACH.”
    https://wonkette.com/tag/inpeach

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenJugend
    • Shanzgood

      I heart me some Uncle George.

      • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

        George Takei and Sir Patrick Stewart – do you know what it’s like to find that your heroes on TV are heroic in Real Life? :D

        I love them both, for real.

        • Shanzgood

          Heck, yeah!

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            The late Leonard Nimoy was a great man as well, he did a lot of quieter things that improved life for actors, and he was a role-model for a lot of us that are different.

            I don’t expect actors to be role-models and heroes, but I love and admire the ones that are. :)

        • “M”

          “do you know what it’s like to find that your heroes on TV are heroic in Real Life? :D”

          Yes!

          http://backtalk.kinja.com/presented-without-much-comment-chris-evans-fills-ca-1792201902

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            Oh, that’s awesome! Thank you for linking that. :)

          • “M”

            You’re quite welcome! We need all the heroes we can get in these days of the Deluge of Evulz, I think.

            :-)

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            Agreed, and Chris Evans just became a hero to me. :)

  • artem1s

    so I have been interviewing internally and got word last week that I got a new position at the university. I am truly psyched about it. It is a much better group with much better moral and mission and I get to actually work with students and faculty. I felt a little weird about talking about it last week because it was happening right when ZEGS was conspiring to kill millions of people. But I start the beginning of next month and maybe there will be more to celebrate on a broader front as the Yates Avalanche starts up in earnest!

    • Antonin Dvorak

      Mazel Tov.

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      Good for you! Please, share personal good news, a rising tide lifts all boats, morale-wise as well as in other ways. :)

      • Yr. Gma

        Absolutely! We need all the good news we can get! Congratulations!

    • Courser_Resistance

      Congratulations on the excellent news!

    • Doug Langley

      Yay! What position?

      • artem1s

        I will be working in the Social Sciences School on various admin responsibilities, a lot of it grants admin.

    • lroom

      Congrats!

  • YoBunnyBunny

    Awwww… the little DC duckies racing to their mommy… All the squee, y’all!

  • Shanzgood

    Reposting from the OT:

    Still no paperwork through for baconzgood to go home. I have talked to multiple people (County jail, Goodwill) and by the sound of it all, it’s the judge who has failed to initiate the necessary papers. She seems to think the court order is enough but the County needs an actual release order from the judge, not just the court order (which they already have a copy of). His lawyer is supposed to be meeting with the judge today to get her off the mark.

    And here’s a crazy thing: The rapist prison guard who was sentenced to 18 months in the same Goodwill facility? Was released after just three weeks. So it’s not like they don’t fucking now how to let someone the hell OUT of there. It’s no wonder baconz is starting to feel persecuted.

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      Poor Baconz. stay strong, you two. ~hugs~

      • Shanzgood

        It’s getting really difficult. Things are a bit…tense right now.

        • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

          I’m sorry. I can relate to a lot of Baconz’s difficulties, and I know how hard you’ve been working to help him.

        • Contemplative Ron

          Just keep in mind that it isn’t you, even if you’re catching the brunt of it. Part of him knows that, but that part is being swamped by his anger.

          • Shanzgood

            Actually, I’m the one getting snappy, not him.

          • Contemplative Ron

            Oog… then all I can council counsel is either watch some MST3K or grab a shovel and move a half ton or so of gravel. That’s the way I’ve been keeping myself sane lately.

          • Shanzgood

            We just need to have a long talk where he’s not interrupted by a time limit of 20 minutes or a roll call or someone else trying to get a turn on the telephone. He’s so angry and depressed all the time now and I’m running out of things to say or do to help counteract it.

            Also, I would like to punch some Nazis.

          • Contemplative Ron

            It’s a nightmare, I know (more than you might think) but you have to stay strong, for both of you. Sooner or later – and I pray to the gods it’s sooner – you’ll have that time again. And then you can go out and punch Nazis together.
            <offers pony hug, hurting for you>

          • Shanzgood

            Thanks, Ron. We will probably not do any Nazi punching since that might involve jail time for BOTH of us. So we are trying to plan a picnic, an amusement park, a redneck bar and a couple of hate-fucks, possibly followed by some ugly-crying.

          • Contemplative Ron

            That… actually sounds pretty good.

          • Shanzgood

            We’ve had plenty of time to work on an agenda since I had to cancel my last plane ticket. I bought it less than a week before all this happened.

          • Shanzgood

            Oh, and he almost got written up for “deviating” because he went a block out of his way to walk down a more pleasant street than the one the Goodwill center is on. One of the staff members was outside smoking and saw him make a “wrong” turn.

          • Contemplative Ron

            … I’m beginning to think ACTUAL prison would have offered more freedom.

    • CogitoErgoBibo

      It might be worth your while to ask your attorney if there are any sort of liquidated damages the State just sort of coughs up when you’re required to overstay your welcome in one of their facilities due to their own fault. Although, if it’s really just a bunch of people all pointing at each other, not sure who really fucked up, pretty doubtful you’ll get anything. Mere negligence really isn’t actionable against a governmental body under most circumstances. Needs to be a lot more overt and intentional. It’s just worth asking. And even still, that’s cold comfort when you would have settled for an on-time release.

      • Shanzgood

        He just needs to get OUT right now. They’re still screwing with him at Goodwill and I don’t know how much longer he can take it. They gave him a 3-day sanction because he didn’t call them when he got to work. Of course it doesn’t matter that nobody told him he was supposed to and there’s never any paper trail to prove anything.

        • CogitoErgoBibo

          That really is unbelievably anger-inducing. I just hope he gets out of there soon. Geeze. I’m really sorry.

    • Yr. Gma

      This thing is crazy. If it were a novel, no one would believe it. Still, maybe the two of you should turn it into a screenplay and make some money off this nonsense.

      • Shanzgood

        We were going to try to write it all down somehow.

  • rocktonsam

    Sally’s eyes sparkle when she makes words.
    Makes me tingle.
    A true patriot.

  • William

    Sally Yates makes Raphael Cruz her personal Bitotch.

    https://www.facebook.com/NowThisPolitics/videos/1549826361715515/

    • cmd resistor

      So this morning we made the mistake of stopping on FOX as we passed by. First the 3 stooges were talking about some bacon and chocolate recipe. Then they brought in Laura Ingraham, who then spewed a bunch of garbage, including talking about how the Dems had made Sally Yates their new hero and wanted to put her on Mt. Rushmore. Then, unmasking, blah, blah, blah. Twist everything out of shape, blah, blah. I don’t know why I was even surprised.

    • Marla

      Amazing how Ted’s second chin is trying to escape from his first one with each word he says.

    • susan_g

      During the primary campaign, cheeto dissed Cruz’s daddy and wife, and called him a liar at every opportunity, Despite all that,Ted carries his water, only to have Sally Yates dump it on his head.

  • Pierre_de_Fermat

    Did you know that, if it TrumpCare/WealthCare passes, your employer-mandated insurance coverage and benefits could be reduced, if not cut entirely
    simply so that businesses can save money on their bottom line? Don’t
    worry — it’ll generate so much new health that health will trickle down
    to you!

    No, the real reason not to worry is all those good coal mining jobs. We’ll be rich!

    • Pronghorn Cantaloupe

      Yup…right….the power plant we sell our coal to might be shutting down in the next couple years which will put me out of a job. Which doesn’t surprise me but it did shock some co-workers who truly thought Trump was going to somehow save coal.

      • Lily412

        Sorry about your job, homie. About 200 people at my job got downsized. It’s been terrible for morale. I have survivor’s guilt because I wasn’t one of the people who got axed.

        • Pronghorn Cantaloupe

          Ah thanks. We don’t know what is going to happen, yet, but that’s kind of the most recent news. When things are up in the air like this is when people are most likely to get injured. We had a bunch of uncertainty spring 2016 and our injury rate spiked like crazy but luckily nothing serious or fatal.

      • Pierre_de_Fermat

        We had a big steam/power/whatever generating plant on-site near where I worked. Put in (with some controversy) in the 60’s. The steam/power/whatever is still needed, but the coal-fired boilers are being replaced with gas. So the RR tracks will go eventually, which will have someone wondering how long there should be even modest maintenance of the RR spur that leads to them. Might go rails-to-trails. OTOH, the University has considered light rail to move all the parking out. Things change. Not going back to the 50’s either. Either the 19 or 18 versions.

        • Pronghorn Cantaloupe

          It is basically steam-power, ultimately. So the “smoke” from the stacks is actually water vapor and it can be really dramatic in the winter. So it doesn’t matter where the fire comes from because it super heats water which turns turbines which makes the power. Obviously there is retrofitting involved in changing from coal to natural gas and then there is the economic concern of supply and demand for gas prices going up. But we have a lot of oil/gas around here, too, so there is talk about doing some natural gas power. Who knows. But, holy crap, we have a ton of sun so I don’t know why solar isn’t being really actively pursued here.

          I think there was a candidate who was talking about rational energy policy. I think her name was, like, Benghazi McEmails but I liked what she had to say.

          • Pierre_de_Fermat

            Water vapor and carbon. I think a lot is removed now — not supposedly the case in the past. So coal kind of worked against itself. There is some coal in southern Appalachians, but a lot has been exposed and weathered away.
            But more on-topic, yeah, much (most?) of the Sun Belt should be doing solar. In the Midwest they can (and do) go for wind. There is going to be a substantial infrastructure build necessary to accommodate all of this. I don’t know about the state of storage for electricity.
            If DT and the GOP had any sense, they’d tout some absurd giveaways as “green”, “infrastructure rebuilding”, “job-creating”, etc. The Democrats would probably come on board if it wasn’t too big a giveaway to GOP donors, and they got the worst parts taken out (which was the reason they were put in — although, that is how you make the sausage).

            .

          • Pronghorn Cantaloupe

            Yeah there are systems in place now to collect a lot of the ash and SO2 and other stuff from the burning but that obviously is highly dependent on what each power plant has installed and then the quality of the coal they are using. I was just mentioning that some people see the stacks and think it is making smoke like from a camp fire but it’s not the same. We jokingly refer to them as cloud factories. lol. And it can be really cool-looking in the winter when the hot water vapor meets the cold air and just envelops the whole area in their very own homemade cloud. It’s not nearly as dramatic in the summer.

            Energy storage is always a concern but there are interesting, ingenious ideas, like pumping water up a hill using solar energy during the day and then letting it flow over turbines at night to keep producing electricity. So it’s like a natural battery. But that’s not my area of expertise so I don’t know much more than that.

            Since the election there have been some Appalachian-area mines that have re-opened *but* unfortunately safety concerns aren’t important to everyone and MSHA depends on federal money for inspectors. So, tragically, there have subsequently been some fatalities where those smaller mine operators cut corners on safety when they can get away with it. :(

          • Pierre_de_Fermat

            So now we’d be looking on HRC’s First Hundred Days and be taking competent government for granted.

          • Pronghorn Cantaloupe

            Could you imagine the Republican investigations already? OMG. I was so ready to be constantly enraged by them hassling her but, man, I would much prefer that rage over the rage and despair I enjoy now.

      • Pierre_de_Fermat

        I’m sorry, did not read far enough into your post and did not realize it could affect your job. Very, very sorry. I would not do that. My only thought is that a lot of what we grew up with (good and bad) is going to change in ways we may not like. Hopefully some good will come of it, if not for us, then perhaps a greater community.

        • Pronghorn Cantaloupe

          Oh, yeah, no problem. I am not expecting coal to exist forever and I don’t know for sure what I will do with myself but I am a realist and although I have a personal bias for fossil fuels (and basically my entire family works in fossil fuels), I acknowledge the harmful elements and I don’t reject climate change. Which makes me a weirdo around the mine. Actually, there are a lot of things which make a weirdo around the mine but they benefit from it, I think. :)

    • lroom

      My Trump loving family member is convinced that coal is the cheapest kind of energy out there and will not listen to anyone about it. He believes Trump is gonna take that land back that the Democrats are hiding and make the coal industry our main source of power. Evidently make America great means make America 18th century again to these idiots.

      • TheBoatDude

        Where did one hide land?

        • lroom

          I have no idea but he’s sure the Democratic Party is hiding it.

  • that local news thing, I have been noticing that the new trend in several local markets seem to be blondes in form fitting but otherwise fashionless short no-sleeved dresses.
    Even the weather girl, when it was like 40 out.
    ayep.

    • jesuswasablack

      Our weather chick here is Chicago is hot, hot, hot! I never fall asleep before 10:20 CDT anymore! Even my wife noticed how I have been taking a keen interest in tomorrows forecast lately!
      http://www.andyarmstrongphoto.com/wp-content/uploads/IMG_3104c.jpg

      • Doug Langley

        Sigh. When I grew up, our weather girl was Marsha Yockey, a gal who made Phyllis Diller look like a beauty queen.

        • TheBoatDude

          We had Angelo Salis. A fine individual but, alas…

      • I don’t have a teevee, I bootleg things through the internet. What channel? I swear, there’s half-a-doze local stations in Chicago.

        • jesuswasablack

          ABC 7, and yes she’s actually worn that dress on air!

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      I push the weather button on my phone and look at the weather picture. (sighs) A few years ago there was an iPhone app called “Bikini Weather” or something like that. It displayed the temperature and forecast over any of several pictures of women in bikinis.

  • goonemeritus

    Alex Jones losing his custody battle is just the latest example of the State siding with women and oppressing the rights of extreme narcissists with full blown delusional episodes.

    • sarafina

      You say that like it’s a bad thing.

      • goonemeritus

        When will evil delusional people get fair shake?

  • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

    THOSE are the gibbons we like!

    • The Wanderer

      Durn tootin.’

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Hey Wonkers, sorry to OT your lovely asses on this post, but I’m having a super hard time not pulling out a beer at 1030 in the a.m. so I’m using y’all as my sponsors today. Just knowing someone’s watching should keep me on the straight up.

    • lroom

      I’m here if you need to talk.

    • suziq

      Distract yourself with kitteh pictures or something-noon will be here soon!

    • TheBoatDude

      How you holding up, blue?

      • House0fTheBlueLights

        Mood is still terrible but I’m not on the sauce. I had a crazy high on Sunday so I knew this was coming, but it hit really hard. I’m allergic to every known BPD drug in the universe (except alcohol which has an obvious downside) so I have to slog through this shit on willpower.

  • Lucas Foxx

    Flynn’s military career is becoming clearer. He was in charge of intel in Afghanistan. It’s no wonder that conflict has been at an essential stalemate for over a decade. Not only could the xenophobe not get good intel from the people of Afghanistan, but when that wasn’t working out, he decided to move on and focus his people way outside of Afghanistan. Everyone (America/Allies) involved disagreed and told him to stay in his lane. That was all likely Putin’s idea to embarrass us and get us out of his turf.

  • calliecallie

    Comey is a lying sack of shit. That’s all.

    • Marla

      Well, he is an untrustworthy asshole whose only concern is his self-preservation.

    • BreakingDeadMen

      The most generous term I can muster is schlemiel.

  • lroom

    I’m dreaming of a Sally Yates/Al Frankin ticket in 2020.

  • Huh? I thought Jones’s “crazy dial” was ALREADY turned to 11? Isn’t that at least the miminum qualifications to work in Wignut media?

  • Lily412

    George Will is a huge douche. If I remember correctly, he wrote an article saying that chicks who get raped at college parties while intoxicated are totally at fault for drinking. Apparently, the onus is on ladies to stay alert and guard our vaginas at all times, not on dudes who should be taught what rape is and not to do that.

    • BreakingDeadMen

      IDK if he said that exactly–wouldn’t put it past the bow-tied little prick–but he did say that campus rape “conferred status” on the victims. FTG. When a stopped clock is right, it doesn’t excuse what happened the other 1438 minutes of the day.

    • Yr. Gma

      He is. Huge douche, that is. However, he hates Donnie, and he’s a conservative, so maybe he can punch a few tiny holes into the Big Donnie Love bubble. Of course, that means there will be conservatives watching MSNBC, aka Fox News Lite. Lose-lose situation.

  • BreakingDeadMen

    Please bear with me for a moment of admittedly sexist objectification. Sally Yates is a very youthful 56. Melania Trujmp is nearly a decade her junior, and look how much more ravaged by time she is. I think there is something to this living right thing.

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      I agree with you 100%. Miz Yates is a knockout, the total package. :)

      • BreakingDeadMen

        I would leave my wife for her–and then beg her to take me back after Ms. Yates broke my heart.

        • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

          XD

        • Yr. Gma

          Does Mrs. DeadMen read Wonkettte?

          • BreakingDeadMen

            Hope not!

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Melon is ravaged by prolonged exposure to Little Donnie’s toxicity. As the news continues to cover him 24×7, we will all suffer from the same accelerated aging.

  • David Chaillou

    The Bannon counter-offensive against Kushner continues:
    http://www.breitbart.com/news/kushner-emerged-as-conduit-for-canada-on-nafta-talks/

  • UnsaltedSinner
    • David Chaillou

      I am not a Macron fan but this is pure comedy gold.

  • Khavrinen

    “Trump might try to re-re-invade Afghanistan in an effort to create a distraction and boost to his poll numbers, just like the last two Republican presidents.”

    Trump may not throw out the first baseball, or attend the White House Correspondent’s Dinner, but he’ll still follow the important Presidential traditions.

  • Zyxomma
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