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If there is one thing Donald Trump knows about, it is hiring the best people. However, hiring the best people is, apparently, something that can mean different things to different people. Or at least to Donald Trump. “The Best People” in his case appears to refer to those who are related to him by blood or marriage, those with extensive ties to Russia like Mike Flynn, or ties to fascist groups like Sebastian Gorka, or — as is the case with literally every one of his other appointees — people who are adamantly unqualified for the post they have been assigned.

Falling into the later category is Teresa Manning, the new deputy assistant secretary of the Office of Population Affairs — whose specific job it is to oversee Title X funds, which cover things like family planning, STD tests, mammograms, etc. Now, given that this is a Trump appointment, it is probably not shocking that Manning is an anti-choice weirdo who has worked for two separate anti-abortion groups. It is probably not even surprising that she doesn’t think funds for family planning should even exist in the first place. What is perhaps a tad more surprising is that — unlike most people who have been around for the past century — Manning is not so sure that birth control actually does anything to prevent pregnancies.

In fact, Manning is quite certain that birth control actually increases the incidence of abortions! How that is possible, no one knows, but she’s sure of it.

Via Mother Jones:

Manning has questioned the efficacy of contraception in preventing pregnancy, and also said the government shouldn’t play a role in family planning—the foundational ideas behind the federal family planning program she will now be tasked with overseeing. In a 2003 radio interview, Manning noted that pro-choice advocates “promote contraception and birth control as a way to reduce the incidence of abortion. There really is no evidence to support that. In fact, the incidence of contraception use and the incidence of abortion go up hand in hand.” She also said that pro-choice advocates view abortion as a backup form of contraception for when birth control fails (oral contraception is effective over 99 percent of the time when taken properly): “Of course, contraception doesn’t work. Its efficacy is very low especially when you consider over years,” she said. Manning continued: “The prospect that contraception would always prevent the conception of a child is preposterous.”

Manning also believes that the morning after pill causes an abortion, rather than prevents fertilization, because, clearly, she just has no idea how the human body even works.

Here is a picture of the insides of a woman’s body, as drawn by a 16th century barber surgeon. As you can see, her insides are actually just a giant snake.

That is a rather generous assessment of where Teresa Manning’s current understanding of human biology is — somewhere around 16th century barber surgeon. If we are lucky, she will use Title X funds to address the problem of our wandering wombs causing hysteria, and at the very least we’ll get some vibrators out of the deal. Perhaps she will even lend some of her wisdom to the NIH, and there will be leeches enough for everybody!

All of this aside, it’s pretty darned crappy that this lady is in charge of Title X, because we’ve actually been doing pretty well at preventing unwanted pregnancies over the last few years! Teen pregnancy has really gone down! The incidence of abortion has also decreased — in all states, not just those that have enacted absurd anti-abortion laws. We now have 200,000 fewer abortions a year than we did when Bush II was in office, and that is due to the affordability and availability of birth control.

It is worth noting, by the way, that Lady Anthony Comstock over here once tried to file a discrimination suit against the University of Iowa Law School, which she claims did not hire her to teach there because she is a conservative who hates abortion. She did not win it, on account of the fact that she actually was not hired because she said she would only teach law writing and not law analysis, and the job required her to be able to do both of those things. In light of this Ms. Manning must be very excited to finally be hired for a job she is not at all qualified to do.

[Mother Jones]

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  • Chadwells

    Ugh…when does the shit show fucking end.

    • willi0000000

      i’m hoping for before i die.

      [ i’m 68 now (the universe owes me one) and have severe COPD, don’t exercise and eat mostly junk . . . i still have my hopes up ]

      • Chadwells

        Stay strong…I’m rooting for all of us to witness it!!

  • Randy Riddle

    Phyllis Schlafly’s corpse wasn’t available?

    • mardam422

      Too soon?

      • FlownΩver

        Never too soon. Nor often enough.

  • BloviateMe
  • ManchuCandidate

    Gee, another “Every ovum is sacred until it grows up wanting my tax dollars for luxuries like an education or mere survival” Trump appointee moron.

    The Trump Admin’s unholy union of jeebus freaks, Russia House traitors, money grubbing assholes and gun happy wingnuts continues. We should all consider ourselves fortunate that they are mostly incompetent fuckups and the damage they will do will not be entirely catastrophic*

    *invalidated if Trump nukes everyone.

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    Tomorrow’s NYT op ed: “Medical science has not found any snakes in women’s reproductive systems, but do we really know for sure that snakes might not be there?”

    • snark-lurker

      mebbe they were looking in the wrong place

    • ManchuCandidate

      John Holmes would disagree. Oh, you mean biblical ones and not 10 inchers.

    • Crack_A_Toe_Ah

      The President’s callin’ an emergency meetin’.
      The King of Siam sent a telegram sayin’ “Wop bop a loop a lop a lop boom bam!” Wooee…
      What’s inside a girl?

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OT4AysVkuRs&list=RDOT4AysVkuRs#t=0

  • MynameisBlarney

    So…when turmp either gets yanked from the Oval Office in a straight-jacket or in handcuffs…all his ridiculous appointees will get purged immediately after, right?

    • ManchuCandidate

      Hahaha, you’re quite cute when you’re naive.

      You’ll have to burn them out like Ticks.

      • Sedagive ’em Hell

        Just remember: don’t leave the head behind!

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          Their heads are empty. It’s their hearts that need to be excised.

    • Sedagive ’em Hell

      Yes. The answer has to be yes.

    • Vincent Ricola

      From the Mercer families cold dead hands.

      • MynameisBlarney

        And that’s a problem?

    • MynameisBlarney

      Lookin’ like some folks may be fitting him for a straight jacket and a padded cell…

      http://www.rawstory.com/2017/05/he-just-seemed-to-go-crazy-senior-gop-aides-stunned-by-trumps-bizarre-behavior-in-last-24-hours/

      • TJ Barke

        It’s because he has dementia, you bunch of stupid tools.

  • mardam422

    Hmmm. Barber-surgeon. I wonder what an appointment with that guy is like.
    “Hello, can you please trim this tumor? Just a little off the top.”

  • TJ Barke

    More blatant liars with bullshit agendas, what a surprise.

  • memzilla Ω

    By her logic, then, I should take Cialis® to make my boner go away, put sugar in my coffee to make it more bitter, and sand in my car engine to make it run smoother. Got it.

  • janecita

    I was promised, that there would be only good news on my birthday! You guys suck!

    Ps. I just turned 40, my daughter says that I’m officially an “old.”

    • TJ Barke

      My condolences.

      • janecita

        For the bitchy daughter, or the many years?

        • TJ Barke

          Yes.

    • willi0000000

      you’re still a child . . . when do you plan on having the umbilical cut?

    • SpideySenser

      Happy Birthday. Speaking for myself, I would enjoy being 40 again.

      • willi0000000

        i would kill an unspecified number of anything to be 40 again!

        • Msgr_MΩment

          Spoiler alert: warranty expires around 45, then it’s off to Helena handbasket.

    • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

      Happy birthday/Condolences!

    • MynameisBlarney

      40?

      Pffffft! Yer still just a babbeh!

    • snark-lurker

      40 is when wimmenz begin to get to their sexytimes hottest!

    • grindstone

      Youngster. Get off my lawn.

      • Marytblanding

        My last paycheck was $22500 for working 12 hours a week online.Start earning $97/hour by working online from your home for few hours each day with GOOGLE… Get regular payments on weekly basis… All you need is a computer, internet connection and a litte free time… Read more here
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    • Sedagive ’em Hell

      40 was a very, very good year : )

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      I remember when I turned 40. Truman was still President…

      Feliz cumpleaños, amiga.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Happy boitday!
      And congrats on reaching the good years.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      40 makes you officially an “old”?
      How quaint. You keep thinking that, kid-o.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Happy Birthday, young pup.

    • phoenix00

      Happy birthday, and many more!

    • The Wanderer

      Molotov! Many happy and healthy years!

    • puredog

      If you’re old, I’m dead.

    • Shanzgood

      Tell her comments like that are why some animals eat their young.

      Oh, and happy birthday!

      • janecita

        Right?! She is awful!

    • theblackdog

      Happy Birthday!

    • lroom

      Happy Birthday!

  • Lefty Frizzell

    Fucking brilliant.

    It’s a standard argument of abstinence-only prudes, hypocrites and theocrats that contraception doesn’t work and only encourages young people to have wild dirty sex.

    No amount of irrefutable, statistical evidence to the contrary will convince them, because
    they are not right in the head.

    • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

      This is why Republicans would rather not test the mental health of gun owners. They’d lose most of their customers.

    • cheetojeebus

      They made a similar nonsense argument against that vaccine for HPV.

      • Lefty Frizzell

        “I don’t want my daughter to have sex or cancer but if I really have to choose, I’ll go with cancer”

  • MynameisBlarney

    So…is he gonna appoint a fucking anti-vaxxer for Surgeon General?

    • elviouslyqueer

      Oh lord, don’t even plant that idea anywhere near his head!

    • TJ Barke

      I thought it was a smoking causing cancer denier…

      • Beowoof14

        I am pretty sure Pence can help him there.

        • The Wanderer

          They guy who looks like Brylcreem with acid reflux?

      • puredog

        Or just his own “doctor.”

    • theCryptofishist

      Nah. Head of the CDC.

  • Lefty Frizzell

    somewhere around 16th century barber surgeon

    As Sir Pterry said – “Shave and a haircut, no legs!”

  • cheetojeebus

    I hope the two shit house rats fighting for control of her cranium kill each other soon.

  • george gonzalez

    Y’know, can someone please pass a law or constitutional amendment that candidates for any office higher than Sewage Commissioner score at least 85% on a 8th-grade civics, American History, and General Science tests? That would filter out a good 85% of the numbskulls that somehow have enough time after their mouth-breathing classes to go campaign and win public office.

  • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist
    • Lance Thrustwell

      Blue jay surgery? I guess they’ll bill him later as well.

      • Bobathonic

        When those bills are paid, the doctors truly feather their nests.

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg

    I’ve always had a feeling that those anti-abortion people don’t really understand how abortions work and if they would be allowed, they’d think their parents in hindsight might have one.

  • Sedagive ’em Hell

    It’s a simple question of weight ratios: even a large stork cannot carry a seven pound newborn human baby (perhaps a grossly-oversize African Swallow, and only if the baby has a husk).

    Ergo: the science is in – no birth control ban on storks!

  • Royal Ugly Dude

    Manning’s current understanding of human biology is — somewhere around 16th century barber surgeon.

    Theodoric of York libel!

  • FlownΩver

    Hey, Trix – WTF! There’s an ad down here! I know comments are not allowed, but I thought ads were not allowed for realz.

    • jesterpunk

      Are you on mobile or desktop? On my iphone I see the ads but I dont on desktop but I also have adblock installed on my desktop.

      • puredog

        My favorite thing about AdBlock is that when the Cookie Monster sez “Nuh-UH! You can’t see this content because you’re running an adblocker!” it allows you to unblock “this page only” instead of giving a free pass to that whole website forever.

    • TJ Barke

      Same thing recently happened on The Jimquisition. Seems disqus is now having forum runners pay protection.

  • But if you just Jesus good enough, you won’t… well, you will get pregnant, but it’ll be at 18 years old when you’re married to your high school sweetheart and feel nothing but shame and regret about sex for the rest of your life, even after the nearly inevitable divorce and remarriage.

    And if you don’t Jesus good enough, you’re just a slut and a whore and we won’t give you any financial support and no man will want you, so it all works out… for… someone… I don’t know who… maybe the moralists who push this stuff on kids.

  • proudgrampa

    Jesus Fucking Christ.

  • chascates

    I think I understand now. Somehow the Earth passed into an alternate bizarro universe.

    • Antonin Dvorak

      I think it’s simpler than that. We have always been Earth-2, but are just now realizing it.

      • Querolous

        I blame it on the Cubbies winning the World Series. It caused a disruption to occur in the space-time.

  • Family planning starts and ends in the Truck stop diner.
    https://media.giphy.com/media/l0HlIFuFDZpJzkMY8/giphy.gif

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Trump’s latest book deal: Serving America
    Spoiler alert: It’s a cookbook!

    • snark-lurker

      is it a kook book?

      • phoenix00

        Or cuck book?

  • Beowoof14

    Trump hiring people completely unqualified for their role continues. And I thought Rick Perry was over the top when it came to stupid. Yet Donald finds new ways to amaze everyday.

  • Hairstrike Alpha

    Trump collects assholes like a babboon’s ass collecting fleas….the bloated orange fuckbag alt-right troll.

  • elviouslyqueer

    It is worth noting, by the way, that Lady Anthony Comstock over here once tried to file a discrimination suit against the University of Iowa Law School, which she claims did not hire her to teach there because she is a conservative who hates abortion. She did not win it, on account of the fact that she actually was not hired because she said she would only teach law writing and not law analysis, and the job required her to be able to do both of those things.

    I am shocked, SHOCKED that someone who flat out told the interview committee that, if hired, she would only do part of her job, didn’t actually make the final cut.

    • Contemplative Ron

      Apparently she was as well.
      She and Cheeto Benito do make quite the pair.

  • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

    Yay! We’ll all be Mississippi now. STD’s for everyone!

    • Lance Thrustwell

      I got dibs on Syphilis! That’s my favorite.

      • puredog

        Piker. HIV FTW.

        • The Wanderer

          There are a group of people called “gift givers,” who deliberately infect others (on request) with various diseases up to and including The Ninja.

      • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

        Oooh, beat me to it. Can I have Gonorrhea? It sounds so classy!

      • Querolous

        The GOPers all have Derpes.

  • Nockular cavity

    Hell of a tapeworm that lady’s got.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    The conservative view on sex reminds me so much of Woody Hayes’ rationale for avoiding the pigskin sportsball forward pass: three things can happen and two of them are bad.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Makes a guy want to run out on to the field and clock an opposing player or something, don’t it?

  • La forza del resistino

    This smells of a Mike Pence nomination following a 1 on 1 interview while Mrs. Pence was at the peephole.

    • willi0000000

      which pee-hole would that be again?

  • cheetojeebus

    Must be interesting to live your life convinced that your completely mad speculations about shit you know nothing about hold the weight of ultimate authority. And further that everyone else should live their lives making the most important decisions they can make per your pronouncements.
    There needs to be an expletive, an appellation so vile one can not utter it specifically for these fucking narcissists. But for the moment I’m going to go with ass munching shit spittle.

    • Ricky Gay

      I go with right-wing christian

      • Contemplative Ron

        ChristianIST. There’s nothing ‘christian’ about them, big OR little ‘c.’

  • Fidel Jack Tenhet

    If I live to be ten thousand years old, I will never understand the diseased logic behind taking a job with a group/organization you absolutely do not believe should even exist in the first place. Manning is otherwise entitled to have her own opinions about Title X, but not while wetting her own beak on a paycheck she is too woefully unqualified for.

    I don’t agree with the KKK at all. That makes me the absolute worst person to determine the allocation funds for burnable crosses. I hate the Klan, which also means I wouldn’t take a job with them in the first place on moral grounds .

    This is just as stupid as expected.

    • mackafritz

      You take that job to destroy that organization.

      • Red Bird Ω

        Exactly.

      • phoenix00

        See: Scott Pruitt; Environmental Protection Agency

        • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

          See: AOT, K

      • Fidel Jack Tenhet

        That’s what I’m most afraid of.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    New Health and Human Services Charmaine appointee Yoest believes that abortions cause cancer. I’m starting to get some insights into the whole “white women voting for Trump” thingie.

    • Red Bird Ω

      And that would be???

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Self-hating fundie nitwits dumber than two boxes of rocks?

        • Red Bird Ω

          You think they hate themselves? I think they love themselves just enough to know where the power is.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    How did that woman pictured above fit so much snake insider her? Nudge, nudge, wink, wink.

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    “You must be THIS STUPID to join the Trump Administration.”

    • mackafritz

      I don’t think I can spread my arms wide enough to express that.

      • The Wanderer

        You’d have to be Reed Richards.

  • The Wanderer

    Barber surgeon libel. I got my medical degree at Salerno (Class of 1271) and we were taught that were no giant snakes inside a woman’s womb. However, we knew that all women had to have a husband or there’d be an unhealthy buildup of female sperm, which would require bleeding in order to balance the humors.

    • mackafritz

      Did you attend with Theodoric of York?

      • The Wanderer

        Yes, actually. He had some radical theories, like reversing sterility in men by hiding their hats.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          Hmmmm. *rifles through closet looking for hat*

          • Contemplative Ron

            You keep your sledgehammer in the same closet as your rifles?

        • theCryptofishist

          Progressive

          • The Wanderer

            Definitely. He even thought that you could treat people for the stone by hitting them in the affected area with a sledgehammer.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Can you recommend a good trepanner?

      • The Wanderer

        Let me get my chainsaw.

      • TJ Barke

        Trepanning libel! Recent research suggests it was actually done to relieve pressure caused by cranial hemorrhaging.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          Did I say I didn’t have some cranial hemorrhaging?

          • TJ Barke

            That’s fair…

        • The Wanderer

          No, you have to let the demons out. Everyone knows that.

          • TJ Barke

            They may have thought it was caused by demons, but it was serving a real purpose.

          • Occupied Territory of Kavefish

            Wait.. I thought it was the dogs?

    • Red Bird Ω

      Unhealthy buildup? Is that what that is?

    • This is why i love wonkette.

  • h4rr4r

    Why is there advertising?

    I thought we weren’t doing that anymore.

    • theCryptofishist

      I fear it may not have worked out. *sigh*

      • Shanzgood

        I would have thought they’d make an announcement. I’ve been presuming DicksUs hijacked it like last time.

        • h4rr4r

          Yeah, it looks like just one add, right above disqus.

          • theCryptofishist

            I’ve seen several on two separate pages.

          • Shanzgood

            I’ve got them all over the place.

        • theCryptofishist

          I would have thought so, too. I did not realize it had happened before, so I had no basis for thinking that. Thanks.

          • Shanzgood

            DicksUs slammed the site with ads even for those who subscribed to ad-fewer and Shy & Trix couldn’t get rid of them so they told them to fuck off and went ad-free. I figured DicksUs was up to their old tricks again.

        • aureolaborealis

          Adblock tells me it has blocked 14 ads on this page. And I’m a subscriber. hmm.

      • House0fTheBlueLights

        It’s Disqus I think. And it’s fucking the site up–jumping all over the place, taking forever to load and keeping other sites from loading.

    • Contemplative Ron

      I’m expecting an announcement. In the meantime I’ve turned my ad-blocker back on.

      • h4rr4r

        Boo, I will admit to only donating and not setting up a reoccurring thingy, but even my kids daycare does not get one of those.

      • h4rr4r

        Either way some communication would be awesome.

  • Shanzgood

    This shit is why PPH saw a 900% increase in requests for IUDs after the election.

    • The Wanderer

      Women trying to prevent the creation of more Republicans?

      • Shanzgood

        Just trying to get enough birth control to outlast the sonsabitches.

    • cats530

      How long before LARCs are declared “the devil’s work!” After all, we are headed back to the 16th century.

  • UnsaltedSinner

    I guess Manning, like me, gets most of her education from Mr. Cholmondeley-Warner.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ivsb79-h90

  • The Librarian

    Auntie Choice’s appointment isn’t a shock since Trump keeps naming unqualified Bizarro World people to head agencies/departments. It is, however, another kick in the teeth to those of us in the real, modern world. Pass the leeches, please, I feel a headache coming on…….

    • The Wanderer

      Just remember to consult your horoscope first, so you know where to put the leech.

      • efoveks

        For all these years I’ve been doing it wrong. Oh, the things I learn from the comments here, which don’t exist!

        Also, I accidentally snorted a little coffee when I read this. I hope it doesn’t hurt the leeches!

        • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

          Ur doing it wrong if you are snorting coffee down there

          • The Wanderer

            (evil giggles)

          • theblackdog

            Or you have one heck of a talent.

        • Ghenghis McCann

          You can always get more from here: Biopharm – Suppliers of Leeches since 1812
          http://www.biopharm-leeches.com/

      • Ghenghis McCann

        There are many non-commenters here who don’t need a horoscope to tell them where to put the leeches.

      • Occupied Territory of Kavefish

        My horoscope says to avoid leeches when Mercury is in Uranus.

        I guess I need a different thermometer, then. :-/

        • Contemplative Ron

          ISWYDT

        • VirginiaLady

          You named your mouse Mercury? Well, it is your mouse.

      • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

        How do we do that now that Nancy Regan and Dionne Warwick are dead?

      • The Librarian

        I need a humors chart!!!!!

        • Jeffery Campbell

          You just need bile, just bile. You can choose between yellow and black.

  • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

    I’d have to look it up to be sure, and I’m lazy and/or stoned. But I think Title X and The Family Planning Act are related. The Family Planning Act is a prime target: it allows folks 13 and over to make medical decisions about their hoo-haws and tallywhackers without parental consent.

  • rosenbomb

    Question. To feed my innards-snake, do I stick mice up my hoo-ha, or swallow them?

  • VirginiaLady

    16th century barber surgeon libelz!

  • Contemplative Ron

    And the work of converting America into a third-world rogue state continues.

    • natoslug

      My hanai daughter keeps pushing me to apply for a position at the company she works for. Apparently they’re starting up a new data analytics group in Germany, and she thinks my qualifications would definitely get me the job. Unfortunately, I’ve promised not to move the rest of the family again until after the boy-child graduates from high school, so I am holding off for now. Too much more of this “winning” shit and the boy-child is going to have to accept spending his senior year and beyond in not-America.

      • foreign agitator Captain Kraut

        Come on over, your boy-child won’t mind the move once he discovers the legal drinking age in Germany!

  • tinker12
    • I see no rick perry. We can’t have the full Monty without rick perry.

    • unclejeems

      Kleptokakistocracy.

  • theblackdog

    I’m surprised he appointed her because she’s clearly not a 10 by his standards.

    • cats530

      She paid a lot of money for that position, just like DeVos. Besides, she can suck the chrome off of a bumper hitch.

  • Jgb979

    “Against the pill” in 2017 = I don’t understand how my uterus works

    • cats530

      “and I believe that my husband and my priest are the best men to regulate it.” /s

  • JoeChristmas

    Will she work in the Ovulation Office?

    Srsly, I am nauseous about the dystopia is choking us like kudzu.

  • Lurkylu

    that lady is very anti-choice….of eyebrow plucking.

  • bupkus231

    Geez – Rump still hasn’t nominated people for the large majority of positions in the government that require confirmation, but he finds time to appoint this person, one who has apparently suffered spontaneous abortion of her soul ( no matter how pious she professes to be ).

    I suppose it’s a bad idea, but what if the laws were changed to limit the nimber of appointments that the President can make without confirmation ( turn it over to the OPM or the Ethics Counsel ).

    • Relativicus

      He’s not naming any of these people he’s just signing whatever Heritage, et al., puts in front of him.

      • cats530

        Sounds like the orange dumpsterfire may be fellating Tony Perkins. But the question is, why?

  • natoslug

    I am white(ish), male, middle-class, and woefully unqualified for many things. I should be a shoe-in for Secretary of the Navy or Agriculture or Alt-CIA. C’mon, White House, send me my golden job ticket now!

    • Viktor DoKaren

      I don’t know there’s that “ish” part. Do you have any Russian connections?

      • natoslug

        Does a Russian exchange student at the boy-child’s high school count? And the “ish” comes from generally being more pink and beige (although lots of lobster-red now, thanks to a sunny four day weekend and catching up on yard work) than white.

        • Viktor DoKaren

          lol You may have in there.

  • I wonder if her attitude to contraception is related in any way to her (sinful) use of ear decoration

    • cats530

      Yes, “If God had wanted you to have holes in your earlobes, he would have put them there,” as I heard from fundies growing up.

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      Plus, that there ear decoration is Idolatry, in and of itself.

  • Relativicus

    “If there is one thing Donald Trump knows about…”

    There isn’t

    • natoslug

      He knows all of the things about tacky gilt and cheap knockoffs. Or loves them, at least.

  • The Flaming Carrot

    Ms. Manning was found guilty of being an idiot by a jury of her peers in Iowa. That really tells us something.

  • SadDemInTex
  • akita96th

    Trumps jobs are listed as….Excellent pay..Great benefits great tax payer health insurance..No formal education required…You dont have to be stupid to work here we will train you…You must be wealthy..other than that it is all about you baby.

  • Iron Monkey

    I guess it is just dumb to ask why a woman who doesn’t think that government should be involved in family planning would take a job as head of the government family planning office.

    This is beyond even deconstructing the administrative state.

    • cats530

      The godless heathens must be regulated by good righteous Christian folk. God speaks to his followers personally and tells them this. So it must be so!

  • NastyBossetti

    As you can see, her insides are actually just a giant snake.
    Are you sure this isn’t right? It would really explain a lot of things about my life.

    • cats530

      Where’s the apple? Is that rolling around behind the snake somewhere?

  • mfp

    i’m seeing ads in the non-comments…anyone else seeing ads in the non-comments?…i is a subscriber, too. also

    • zerosumgame0005

      not, me, make sure you are logged-in?

      • mfp

        yes, i am logged in…good somethingorother, dave…it’s really weird, maybe it’s a dicsucs thing…but it shouldnt matter since wonkywoo is ad-free now anyway, right?

        i’ll go thru about a 1/2 dozen orso comments and then ‘comments will continue after advertisement’, ‘sponsored’, then a photo to click (not)…and in the lower right corner of the ad space ‘report ad’, which i do, and the ad goes away….very strange

        • canuckette

          I’m seeing the ads too – I haven’t tried clicking ‘report ad’.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Now we know why the White House wanted to get rid of Let Girls Learn. Fuck.

  • Poly_Ester

    Any relation to Chelsea Manning? They both seem confused

    • cats530

      I’d so much rather have Chelsea nominated for the position. I have a feeling she’d be more kind and compassionate toward woman than this female religious fanatic is. They are both about as qualified to be in the position. It would be nice if a secular, common-sense female OB-GYN was installed instead. But what am I talking about. This is the Trump administration!

  • William
  • cats530

    Her woman-hood card needs to be revoked and replaced with a busybody authoritarian card.

    • Viktor DoKaren

      They have woman-hood cards? And do I/would I want one? I have the body parts. I identify as a woman. But I don’t really dress the way I’ve been led to believe is woman-like. And I have this problem with stating my opinion, repeatedly, unashamedly. Maybe I’ll just crochet myself a cat hood. Much more useful.

      • cats530

        “And I have this problem with stating my opinion, repeatedly, unashamedly.”

        Yes, I’ve got that “problem” too.

  • Bitter Scribe

    Manning is quite certain that birth control actually increases the incidence of abortions! How that is possible, no one knows, but she’s sure of it.

    It’s very simple:

    1) People use contraception because they want to engage in sex without the woman getting pregnant.
    2) Contraception sometimes fails, allowing the woman to become pregnant.
    3) This is an unwanted pregnancy, meaning it is likely to end in abortion.
    4) Therefore contraception causes abortion.

    After all, if no one was allowed to use contraception, then no women would ever get pregnant unexpectedly. Except the ones who did. But who cares, because if you have sex without wanting to get pregnant you’re a filthy hoor anyway.

    • zerosumgame0005

      and the ones who get raped of course…

      • Bitter Scribe

        I’d be willing to bet she believes that “legitimate rape” victims don’t get pregnant because the stress of being raped kills sperm, or however that goddamned nonsense goes.

        • zerosumgame0005

          somehow her believing in that would not shock me at all

  • An Outhouse for the Resistance

    Tell her she’s in charge of the birds and the bees and send her out to weed Michelle Obama’s organic gradens.

  • An Outhouse for the Resistance

    Do Orthodox Jews use contraception? Ivanka is really bringing her modern feminist influence to the administration’s decision.

  • Saxo the Grammarian

    What’s next? Eric Rudolph being put in charge of certifying nurses to assist with abortions?

    • cats530

      speaking of Erics, I nominate Betsy DeVos’ brother, Erik Prince (of Blackwater/Xe infamy), for ‘US Peace Minister.’ I’m sure he’s got the big bucks to pay Trump for that seat.

  • pgjack

    Trump appoints people who appease his base. He then goes out on campaign stops and accepts the adulation of these folks. That makes him feel good. Rinse and repeat.

  • Angela Ruzzo

    I really have trouble understanding why Republicans think they have the right to peer into my Fallopian Tubes and tell them what to do. They are MY Fallopian Tubes, no different from MY ears or MY intestinal tract or MY kidneys. My ovaries also belong to me, although frankly I think they have a mind of their own. I used to wonder if I should register my ovaries as independent life forms and make them pay their own taxes, because they cost me a lot of money over the years by doing their own thing without regard to my personal lifestyle choices. Men’s testicles often seem to do the same thing. Why aren’t Republicans trying to control men’s testicles? That’s where most of the problems start.

    • cats530

      Do we have the right to examine and regulate sagging GOP nutsacks and flaccid willies?

    • Carole

      Well said. But I’ll bet a diaphragm that Ms. Manning has a problem with condoms, too.

  • Querolous
  • Panika MCD

    question of the author:

    are these going to be contemporary vibrators or are we going to be stuck with the wooden hand cranked ones from the times in which the wandering uterus was the generally accepted theory for why women went crazy?

    http://assets.atlasobscura.com/media/W1siZiIsInVwbG9hZHMvcGxhY2VfaW1hZ2VzLzljYjk5Mjc2NTdmOWVmZmRmMV8xVmliZXMuanBnIl0sWyJwIiwidGh1bWIiLCJ4MzkwPiJdLFsicCIsImNvbnZlcnQiLCItcXVhbGl0eSA5MSAtYXV0by1vcmllbnQiXV0

    • HarpyLibtart

      I know it’s wrong, but picturing a wandering uterus rampaging through the streets always makes me laugh.

      • Panika MCD

        I have a friend that was on a poetry tour called The Wandering Uterus way back in the day. it was a great title.

      • Deplorable bob

        That’s because you’re an ignorant cunt.

  • LadyLaz

    Gah!!!!!

    Gah!!!!

    This is just so STUPID!!!! I can’t help it. We don’t live in a goddamn perfect world. People always make mistakes. Always.

  • SeeTrain65

    This explains Manning’s decision of 100 percent funding in the study of the Miasma Theory.

  • Celtic_Gnome

    Well of course she’s against contraception and doesn’t believe they help reduce abortions. The only way to reduce abortions is to outlaw it so no woman will ever have an abortion again.

    Unless you’re a rich, white Republican woman who can afford to go to Canada to have one of their legal abortions, but that’s only when they absolutely need it, not like those poors who just wake up one morning pregnant and say, “It looks like it’s going to rain. I think I’ll go out and get an abortion today.”

    • CriticalDragon1177

      Yes but off “course” gun control will do “nothing” to keep guns out of the hands of criminals.

  • Carole

    Republicans always hate civil rights in employment laws, until they don’t.

  • James Lamere

    Another day , another bible-kissing moron .

  • Akat

    ok, all other psychosis aside, this woman clearly doesn’t know that conception is defined (at least – most? – scientifically) as successful implantation, not fertilization. I’m sure she cares, but I felt compelled to point that out.

    I guess I need to worry about my Mirena causing all kind of abortions every month now or something.

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