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Morning Wonketariat! Welcome to day 102, we made it! Here’s some of the things we may be talking about today.

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  • Nounverb911
    • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

      And ends with epilepsy

      • James

        That image is decidedly uncool.

        Even the brief flash before paged down triggered a migraine . . . at least it didn’t trigger a seizure though, so all good??

  • Nounverb911
    • Red Bird Ω

      Coffee!!!

      • coozledad

        Why not both?!

    • cheetojeebus

      There’s nothing like staring into the abyss with a nice cup a joe in yer mitt.

  • dslindc

    Ew, Monday.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      Stormy Monday (at least here).

  • Hobbes’ Evil Twin

    It would be completely irresponsible not to speculate wildly about all of Sean Hannity’s sexual fetishes. I’m particularly grossed out by his proclivity for donkey dong, which I just heard about on the internet (here).

    • Nounverb911

      I read on the internets that hannity liked to parade in front of Roger Ailes wearing J Edgar Hoover’s dresses.

    • dslindc

      That and the jacuzzi filled with Pepto Bismol, allegedly.

    • Bill D. Burger

      He and Mann Coulter often exchange make up tips. That’s what I read.

      http://www.freakingnews.com/pictures/68500/Sean-Hannity-as-a-Woman–68961.jpg

      • doktorzoom

        While it’s not in the official rules, we don’t do “Ann Coulter is a dude” jokes here, because they’re insulting to trans people. The entire premise of the joke is that there’s something wrong or shameful about being trans, and that is not OK here.

        Seriously, you’ve been here long enough to know better.

        — Dok Zoom, Yr Friendly Neighborhood Comments Moderator

    • Celtic_Gnome

      People are saying…

  • Bill D. Burger

    And in the HereWeGoAgain category:

    [Cohn: ‘We’re convinced we’ve got the votes’ on Obamacare repeal bill
    By LOUIS NELSON 05/01/17 08:07 AM EDT
    White House National Economic Council Director Gary Cohn said Monday that he and other members of President Donald Trump’s administration are “convinced we’ve got the votes” in Congress to pass legislation to repeal and replace Obamacare this week.

    A bill undoing former President Barack Obama’s signature healthcare legislation would be a major victory for Trump, made sweeter perhaps because a previous attempt at repeal and replace failed to pass even the Republican-controlled House last March.

    “Do we have the votes for healthcare? I think we do. This is going be a great week,” Cohn said on “CBS This Morning,” which was broadcast live on Monday from the White House’s East Room. “We’re going to get health care down to the floor of the house. We’re convinced we’ve got the votes and we’re going to keep moving on with our agenda.”]

    http://www.politico.com/story/2017/05/01/trump-obamacare-repeal-bill-gary-cohn-237828

    • h4rr4r

      Not gonna happen.
      The FreeDumb Caucus wants the whole thing thrown out and the Tuesday folks have to keep much of it or will be tossed out.

      • Bill D. Burger

        There’s a LOT of rumbling going on right now. They are mightily trying to offer anything to peel off Tuesday folk. The Yin & Yang that doomed the two prior attempts, one hopes, will continue. But I don’t use absolutes one way or the other when referencing the depths to which the Repukes will sink in this effort and the potential outcome.

      • CogitoErgoBibo

        Freedumb Caucus is supporting it as of now. They admit they can’t repeal, so they’re fidgeting around the edges. My jerkwad of a representative is supporting Zombie Trumpcare and is a Caucus member. He’s also claiming pre-existing conditions are covered in it. Which we all know is bullshit. But they’re supporting this as of right now.

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      Good luck getting it through the Senate; IF it gets through the House.

  • Nounverb911
    • ariel_gee_398

      After this is all over, and assuming we survive, I hope someone introduces a bill to replace all images of Trump in official documents, portraits, etc with an image of Jean Luc Picard face palming.

    • Red Bird Ω

      Lord help us. This is what the greatest country in the world has come to.

    • Bill D. Burger

      “Too bad I wasn’t there. Only I could have worked out a deal. I would have done a deal with the North. I would have done a deal with the South. Bingo, bango__I would have won. Believe me. You can believe me.”

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Sorry, but I’ma go with Zachary Taylor. You know, the one whose party no longer existed eight years after he was elected.

  • baconzgood

    I hope this week is less full of people that need cock punched than last week.

    • Dr Skwerl B-bart MI-6 Expert

      That is part of our weekly prayer at church:

      O God, you made us in your own image and redeemed us
      through Jesus your Son: Look with compassion on the whole
      human family; take away the arrogance and hatred which
      infect our hearts; fill this week with less people that need cock punched than last week; break down the walls that separate us;
      unite us in bonds of love; and work through our struggle and
      confusion to accomplish your purposes on earth; that, in
      your good time, all nations and races may serve you in
      harmony around your heavenly throne; through Jesus Christ
      our Lord. Amen.

      • baconzgood

        Dear Lord in Heaven.

        Help me not to push this person in front of the trolley.

        • Shanzgood

          It might be okay if it’s just the tea trolley.

        • Dr Skwerl B-bart MI-6 Expert

          Confession of sins:
          Almighty and most merciful Father,
          we have erred and strayed from thy ways like lost sheep,
          we have followed too much the devices and desires of our
          own hearts,
          we have offended against thy holy laws,
          we have left unpunched those Nazis which we ought to
          have punched,
          and when too far away we have not stepped close so we could punch that Nazi

          But thou, O Lord, have mercy upon us,
          spare thou those who confess their faults,
          restore thou those who are penitent,
          according to thy promises declared unto mankind
          in Christ Jesus our Lord;
          and grant, O most merciful Father, for his sake,
          that we may hereafter live a godly, righteous, and sober life,
          to the glory of thy holy Name. Amen.

          • baconzgood

            Give me the strength and fortitude that my punch is true and that the cock is hit.

    • Crystalclear12

      Hope springs eternal.

    • GoutMachine

      I learned a fun new word this weekend, courtesy of Thrillist: “Backpfeifengesicht”
      (German) A face that badly needs punching.

      I guess Ted Cruz has been to Germany.

      • baconzgood

        Leave it to the Germans. They have a phrase for everything.

        • The Wanderer

          “I don’t blame you, Baldrick. The German reputation for savagery is well-founded. Their operas can last for three or four days, and they have no word for ‘fluffy.'”
          Blackadder Goes Forth (written from memory)

    • CeeQ

      Your optimism is adorable!

  • Nounverb911

    “I’ll have all of them.”
    –Chris Christie over the weekend.

    https://twitter.com/ebottcher/status/858323953907109888

    • Bill D. Burger

      “Be careful children! He’s unpredictable and dangerous when he’s close to a Cinnabon.”

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Jimmy McGill weeps.

      • Lance Thrustwell

        Make sure to give him a metal fork. He sometimes eats the plastic ones.

    • The Wanderer

      Just keep your hands and fingers away from him.

  • Nounverb911

    No Mikey, DC is NOT working, however, there are help wanted signs all over Washington State.
    https://twitter.com/NorahODonnell/status/859028876818878464

  • baconzgood

    Even remotely think of Sean’s sex life makes me cringe.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      That’s what SHE said.

  • shastakoala

    Sweet Otter video. Once again proof animals cannot love.

  • Nounverb911
    • Msgr_MΩment

      Before or after the war?

    • FlemmishSpy

      The wall is just a pig in a Polk.

  • Monsieur_Grumpe

    Ding dong Gorka is gone.

  • Dr Skwerl B-bart MI-6 Expert

    I overheard some people saying the it is alleged that Sean Hannity once ordered a hot tub filled with feces and bathed in it while felating Chris Christie. Rumors! Funny things!

  • La forza del resistino

    Calling Duterte for NK help is like calling your neighbor to borrow his lawnmower and looking the other way while stepping over his dead wife’s body in the garage when getting the mower.

  • Crystalclear12

    WaPo editor: Fuck it, I’ll just start over.

  • Nounverb911
    • Lance Thrustwell

      Seeing Barron’s name there – btw and not fer nuthin’, but has Trump spent any time at all with that kid over the last hundred days?

      • coozledad

        He says he only has two sons. Barron must be Putin’s child.

        • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

          Would it be irresponsible to speculate Barron is Don Jr’s or Eric’s son?

          • cmd resistor

            He has a much more intelligent face than either of them.

          • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

            That isn’t saying much. I really hope Melania keeps the kid away from his dad as much as humanly possible.

      • schmannity

        Charlie don’t surf and Barron don’t golf!

      • cmd resistor

        Five minutes on the balcony at the Easter Egg Roll. I think he mentioned the kid in his “speech.” Maybe Barron was at the actual roll part, can’t remember.

  • coozledad

    This should be enough to make the joint chiefs remove this stupid sack of shit from office. He’s got a syphilitic gumma in his brain.

    https://twitter.com/fivefifths/status/859022301379125249

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Don’t forget in Trumpland this always ends with:

      #5) Profit!

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Ask Native Americans about Andrew Jackson’s “big heart”. What a fucking moron.

      • cmd resistor

        That’s his new “human” touch, talking about “heart.” He did it in that AP interview where I think he was explaining how you had to have heart to bomb countries because, people could die.

    • Bill D. Burger
    • Msgr_MΩment

      “If you had Andrew Jackson alive today, he would make Elizabeth Warren walk to Oklahoma and make her pay for her own moccasins.”

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      “People don’t realize, you know, the Civil War, if you think about it, why?”

      Class, for extra credit, please diagram this sentence.

      • eyelashviper

        Can only be done if you speak Palinese…

    • cmd resistor

      Just wow. Another oral book report where he didn’t even read the cliff notes.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      Oh, shut the entire fuck up, Twitler. We know the only reason you can even NAME Andrew Jackson is because he’s on your money.

    • What was this nonsense?

  • alwayspunkindrublic
  • Nounverb911
  • CogitoErgoBibo

    Another day. Another futile call to my Freedumb Caucus representative telling him to oppose Zombie Trumpcare. Get those calls in motion, brothers and sisters. The only high-risk pool anyone should be near is located at that shady hotel on the edge of town. Even then, do not recommend.

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      Do make those calls!

    • cheetojeebus

      done, he (a R) says he’s against it btw.

      • CogitoErgoBibo

        YAY!

    • Thank you in red districts doing the lords work (and helping save my job). All i can do is keep having the same conversation with sympathetic dem staffers.

  • Sedagive ’em Hell

    Today’s movie recommendation: Warren Beatty’s “Reds”: one of the best films about politics, love, disillusion, power, and the undeniable forces of history.

    Bonus points: Jack Nicholson’s Eugene O’Neill and Maureen Stapleton’s indelible Emma Goldman.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7538QRuR_VQ

    • La forza del resistino

      And Dolph Sweet as my man Big Bill Haywood

      • Sedagive ’em Hell

        Hell to the yeah!

        Immaculate film.

    • The Wanderer

      One of my favorite films.

      • Sedagive ’em Hell

        Me too – I’ve watched it too many times to count. I saw it when it came out (I was just a kid), and decided I was going to be Louise Bryant.

    • cmd resistor

      I loved that movie, too.

  • Crystalclear12

    Mother Nature has begun her spring cleaning. I was nearly carried away with her enthusiasm.

  • Nounverb911
  • Jeffocaster in Detroit

    If you miss Obamason, you will know that he is gone
    You can hear the dog whistle a hundred days,
    A hundred days, a hundred days, a hundred days, a hundred days,
    You can hear the dog whistle a hundred days.

    Lord I’m one, Lord I’m two, Lord I’m three, Lord I’m four,
    Lord I’m 4 years from him gone.
    From him gone, from him gone, from him gone, from him gone
    Lord I’m four long years ’til he’s gone.

    Not a shirt on my back, not a penny to my name
    Republicans are to blame
    They’re to blame, they’re to blame they’re to blame,
    Lord they are the ones that you can blame.

    If you miss Obamason, you will know that he is gone
    You can hear the dog whistle a hundred days,
    A hundred days, a hundred days, a hundred days, a hundred days,
    You can hear the dog whistle a hundred days.

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      Well played.

  • Nounverb911
    • Crystalclear12

      Did they really get a chalk board and chalk or just use the one left over from the Obama administration, hmmmmmmm?

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω
    • shastakoala

      More like bulldozing the streets.

    • Dr Skwerl B-bart MI-6 Expert

      Loyalty Day!

      • Ghenghis McCann

        Yesterday was Honesty Day. Did Breitbart and Faux News shut down for 24 hours?

    • Ghenghis McCann

      “And those Police armoured vehicles they have in London… Sad…Losers.”

      • Grumpy Twat

        It’s the best we can do under Austerity measures.

        Boris did buy a couple of second-hand water-cannon when he was London Mayor, but even Theresa fucking May thought that was going a bit too far http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-33538171

    • Still. They’re going to win bigly in june.

      • Résistance Land Shark Ω

        Is that due to the Labor party being completely disorganized? Are the other parties just not able to field good candidates?

        • Yes labor’s a wreck (corbyn’s a disaster even if i say so on May Day), UKIP’s imploding (weirdly considering brexit) and lib dems are coming back from the wilderness (though likely to make some gains). Tories are even supposed to make inroads in SCOTLAND.

          The world sucks right now.

          • Résistance Land Shark Ω

            I try to follow some of the politics here in the UK.

            UKIP sunds like a one trick pony (Brexit) and Farage is a detriment to that party. And he’s Donnie Dumbass’ BFF.

            Labor looks like it’s a mess … all the leadership seems to have beat feet. They should be positioned as the foil to May and her Tory hoards.

            I’m not sure what the platform of the LibDems is as compared to Labor. That has never been clear to me.

            Tories in Scotland? Time to call in William Wallace?

          • I think the lib dems are trying to pick up disgruntled remainers who have Tory MPs.

            Yeah apparently the conservatives a making a push in Scotland to scoop up anti-referendum votes from SNP.

    • Grumpy Twat

      The editor of the Daily Mail is going to have a rage stroke when he finds out that the Iraqi Communist Party were marching down the Strand.

      • Résistance Land Shark Ω

        I would pay to see that …

        • Grumpy Twat

          Be sure to post the photos on here.

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Nounverb911

    I hate when this happens…. (Eh, not so much)
    https://twitter.com/BBCWorld/status/859020096764866561

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Nounverb911

    This happened over the weekend, so how many Americans know the words to the Canadian National Anthem?

    https://twitter.com/BraddJaffy/status/858858300749656064

    • Rags

      Dear Canada,
      We surrender.
      Sincerely,
      America

    • The Wanderer

      (raises hand)
      Not in French, though.

      • I had to learn the French version for a play i did years back. Killed my English Canadian mom.

    • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

      Jose can you see, something something, rockets assploding (Fuck Yeah!!!), Amen!

      • The Wanderer

        “Oh say, can you see,
        The bedbugs on me?”

        • cmd resistor

          I learned it as “any” redbugs.

          • The Wanderer

            LOL

      • JohnBull

        Bunch of bombs in the air!

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      Oh Canada,
      You’re way up north and cold.

      I forget the rest. I do thank them for sending my ancestors to Louisiana.

  • schmannity

    Hannity’s tough lawyers could used some Adolph’s Meat Tenderizer before baking.

  • Ezio

    I find it hilarious and pathetic at the same time that Donald Trump appointed all these Wall Street insiders to his cabinet and they still act like they have absolutely no clue how economics work. It also says a lot about the people on Wall Street in the first place.

    • FlemmishSpy

      Can I have my bonus now?

    • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

      “Buy!!! Sell!!!!”

      See how easy it is?

    • Chadwells

      Not even all Wall Streeters…Mnuchin is a Hollywood studio money douche bag. To me…that’s even more frightening.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        You’d think growing up filthy rich because your daddy was one of the bloated plutocrats running Goldman Sachs would have made him at least vaguely familiar.

        • Chadwells

          I mean he did with at Goldman for like 20 years….but he’s been in LA for the last decade or so, right? So I guess he still can be categorized as a Wall Street jerkoff.

    • bupkus231

      Economics ( particularly macroeconomics ) and finance really have very little to do with each other. There’s an intersect, but it’s really only a very small part of either field….

      That’s why so many economists are academics – and so few are multimillionaires.

  • LarryHoudini

    That’s Dr. Gorka, PhD to you, bub!!!

  • Riley Whodat Venable

    Mr. Gwinn,
    Thank you as always, but you forgot to mention that this is International Workers Day. I will be headed to the annual Socialist Crawfish Boil later today.
    Remember, after enough beer everyone is a Wobblie.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Socialist crawfish are the tastiest. Collectively delicious!

      • La forza del resistino

        And they come out in a nice Red hue.

      • Riley Whodat Venable

        Big fat Red ones!

    • Grumpy Twat

      Working on the beer, now. I’ll be wobbly in a bit.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    Aw. We went to Monterey for the otters on our honeymoon. The Steinbeck Spirit of Monterey Wax Museum diorama of whores and cannery workers at a bear baiting was lagniappe.

    Brianna Wu is a fucking idiot.

    • Mpeg

      Wax Museum diorama of whores and cannery workers at a bear baiting

      L-O-L.
      I and SayItWithWookies got to see the otters both at the Aquarium last September and again while strolling the bay. Didn’t budget enough time for much of Cannery Row but saw the Steinbeck statue. I adore his writing; he turns up his nose at it; then we saw a whale in the distance and forgot to disagree..

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I just think it’s really funny that he was shunned back in the day by the lace curtain society in Monterey for writing about A Certain Element and now it’s a manicured resort town with grotty people dioramas.

        • MizzMazz

          Were you looking through my window? Seriously though, I love our aquarium. Glad you saw a whale; it just makes everything better.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            Your whole city is gorgeous. I just really, really enjoy the existence of that museum :)

            Also, there are some hilarious hobo pelicans by the docks.

          • MizzMazz

            Another funny thing about Steinbeck, he hated Salinas, but they erected a center named after him to honor his works. I’m rather amazed the wax museum is still there. Another thing to love about the Aquarium is Star Trek 4 was filmed there, and no, you couldn’t get close. I tried. I live in the poor area now – us poors don’t want to sully the view of the riches, now do we?

          • Erala Contratista

            The Salinas public library system had to close some years ago due to no $$$. Not sure if it got back into business.

          • MizzMazz

            It did, but I remember those days, as I worked and lived near Salinas, and relied on the Library, as many people do. I don’t trust a town that shuts down its Library. as far as I know it is still up and running.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            The thing that struck me the most was that I found I couldn’t really afford birds of paradise or calla lilies for my wedding, but everyone in the Monterey area had the birds of paradise in their yards, and there were calla lilies in the ditches by the parking lot by the beach.

          • MizzMazz

            True fact: we had calla lilies growing over our septic tank in the back yard.

    • Erala Contratista

      Jeeze! On our honeymoon we toured a lumber mill…..

      • LucindathePook

        We went to Cooperstown.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        But was it three thousand miles away from my mother?

  • memzilla Ω
  • jesuswasablack

    “Trump thinks Kim Jong Un is a “smart cookie”, “Trump had a friendly chat with Philippines President Rodrigo Duterte”, “Trump has been eyeballing ways to kill first amendment freedom”

    Nothing to worry about here, move along!
    http://wp.production.patheos.com/blogs/secularoutpost/files/2015/12/Make-America-Hate-Again-300×239.jpg

  • Ωbjectifier
    • Kiri the Unicorn

      I was just about to post that, thanks.

  • TheGrandWazoo2

    A ruthless dictator in Syria kills dozens of innocent citizens with gas and it’s time to call in the cruise missiles. A ruthless dictator in the the Phillipines kills thousands of possibly innocent citizens the old fashioned way with bullets and machetes and it’s time to call and make a dinner invitation. Fuck this guy.

    • Nounverb911

      He’s just protecting his daughters new business.

      https://twitter.com/peterbrack/status/858837157279965184

      • Résistance Land Shark Ω

        Airbrushing?

        • The Wanderer

          As I said over on the DSFB thread, she looks like a Kaminoan with a shorter neck and better skin tone.

      • WotsAllThisThen

        “Live Complicitly”

  • Nounverb911

    Dd she cancel after she realized all the students were poor?
    https://twitter.com/latimes/status/859038466855849984

  • OddMan

    I keep thinking, this will be the one to bring down Our Dear Lord Dampnut™ , but then . . .

    Darrin Bell today in Candorville.
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/32e1d03326c56454c8fa3ce9c6d6db6b3045dd40d6f170c20f54baae9466eeb7.png

    • Alexander Stallwitz

      Whats frighting is he might be right, theres enough dumb people who would vote for Trump again. Of course, the world might have ended by 2020 so it might be moot.

  • Suttree

    Well step one is done. I just came back form the bank and have a new card.

  • Anna Elizabeth

    From now on, I’m blocking everyone that makes Transgender jokes about Ann Coulter. Thank you.

    • JohnBull

      Just as well. Sometimes a joke needs to expire after the sell-by date has passed. Someone should tell Trump.

    • jesuswasablack

      So you can be the biggest asshole hypocrite in the world but if your a tranny you can’t get made fun of?

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        I think there is plenty of material to work with vis-à-vis Ms. Coulter without reaching for that particular range. Plus we already had this conversation more than once re: Chris Christie and fat jokes as well.

        • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

          Trig Palin jokes also, too

      • MynameisBlarney

        Seriously?

      • MynameisBlarney

        That is really fucking offensive.
        Thanks for running off my friend, asshole.

      • HazooToo

        What the hell is wrong with you? Do you know how many people on this site you just offended? All of them extremely well loved by this community. Where do you get off, saying that being transgender is something to be mocked?

        • Not to mention Ann C is NOT transgender and that “joke” is sexist (because a real woman could not possibly be that way!), bigoted (hullo, no, you do not mock minority groups, punching down is for righties) AND not funny.
          So, quadruple whammy really

          • HazooToo

            Exactly. It’s not a fucking joke. It’s a fighting insult, and if it’s a fight they want, they’re gonna fucking get it.

          • Some people don’t get it yet. all the railing about “PCisms! UR RUIN OUR COUNTRY FORCIN MEH TO NOT OFFEND FOLKS!!!” Doth come from the leftist halls as well.
            Baby steps; sooner or later they will get there is a difference between purposefully punching down, and actual humor.
            I will say that for lefties, I find that some of the time, give or take, it seems actual ignorance, and once they learn better, they get it more.

          • HazooToo

            Maher for example. “PC nonsense” is not nonsense. It’s not being a fucking asshole.

      • Suttree

        You probably like nigger and jew jokes also?

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        So make issue with Coulter for her beliefs but lay off her looks.

      • No, you don’t make fun of transgender people for being who they are, and you certainly don’t make fun of cis people by calling them transgendered (or derogative terms for that) as if being transgendered were somehow worthy of ridicule. Only assholes do that. Now you know. Do better.

      • Yr. Gma

        Can I make fun of you for not knowing the difference between “your” and “you’re”?

      • doktorzoom

        Not seeing what you’re replying to, but comment was flagged for use of “tranny” I assume. Making fun of assholes and hypocrites is fine. And if they’re trans, then focus on their assholery and hypocrisy, just as when Ben Carson says something idiotic, we call him A Idiot instead of using racial slurs. That’s not really so hard to understand, is it?

        — Dok Zoom, Yr Friendly Neighborhood Comments Moderator

    • Rick Hill

      Are you sure she isn’t a ghost? Because I can see right through her!!

      Oh, not transparent jokes….

  • wait! what?

    http://www.techtimes.com/articles/206337/20170501/how-new-technology-reveals-early-human-dna-without-skeletal-remains.htm

    Researchers at the Max Planck Institute for Evolutionary Anthropology in Leipzig, Germany, have successfully retrieved hominin DNA from cave sediments without relying on ancient bones or teeth.

    The newly perfected technology instead focuses on traces of mitochondrial DNA preserved in mineral sediments in the soil, and has greatly expanded the horizons of ancient DNA research.

    Shortage Of Ancient Human Fossils

    The need for stepping up the game and devising new ways to get hold of ancient human DNA stems from the scarcity of skeletal remains.

    Even though archaeologists have found a plethora of tools and other human-made artifacts in many prehistoric sites in Europe and Asia, not the same can be said about actual human remains.

    Moreover, many of the recovered fossils don’t have enough DNA to be used in genetic analysis.

    • The Wanderer

      In other words, they’re looking for shit and sloughed-off skin.

      • Finnabar87

        That is the goal of most archeologists, after all.

        • The Wanderer

          True.

      • News always received by cheers on an archaeological site – “we’ve found the midden!!!”

        • The Wanderer

          I recall giggling at the wiki article about the Lloyd’s Bank Coprolite. I figure whoever passed that thing died just from sheer relief.

      • wait! what?

        …and more. Nothing beats chewing off a big toenail by the campfire…

  • Nounverb911
    • Ezio

      Y’know, if Michelle Obama was living in a golden tower at taxpayer’s expense, Alex Jones fans and Trump supporters probably would have staged a coup.

      • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

        They wanted a lynching over her mom eating in the WH while she watched the girls

        • eyelashviper

          And exercise, and eating veggies…the horror!!!!

          • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

            Let’s not forget the Outrage!! over The Dougie

        • cmd resistor

          It will be interesting to see if Melania brings her parents along to DC….Don’t they live in Trump Tower? I assume they do the babysitting when she has to do First Lady stuff?

        • LucindathePook

          Not to mention, the first family pays for their own everyday food. Government picks up the tab for state dinners and such.

          • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

            Pfft. As if facts mattered

    • La forza del resistino

      Come August, those guys will need to stay hydrated.

  • Nounverb911

    Does this mean that the senate will refuse to approve any of his appointees now?
    https://twitter.com/CNNPolitics/status/859040689409150979

    • The Wanderer

      All the lovely things that the Tories are trying to get rid of.

    • Oblios_Cap

      Hear, hear!

  • Carpe Vagenda

    So it looks like maybe John Barron had his own dark side.

    https://twitter.com/chrisgeidner/status/859036294302896129

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      “The threat was later traced to a mysterious figure known as ‘John Barron'”.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      “Carmine”. In 2009. That sounds so Trumpian.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Hey. I grew up there.

    • He’s going to be very busy threatening well over over half the country.

      Good luck with that Donny.

  • La forza del resistino

    I tried to get the day off for our May Day march, but my boss said it was against company policy.

    • snark-lurker

      yuh gotta keep that job! (no snark)

  • eyelashviper

    Good news for Miami, Florida, the USA, and the world…Ros-Lehtinen headed out to pasture, where she can chew her cud and spend ALL her time celebrating that Fidel is now dead. Her entire term in the House was spent railing against Cuba, and ignoring the fact that she lived in the US, and was supposed to look after issues that mattered to all citizens here.

    Dems have a great shot at picking up a House seat and adding a modicum of sanity to Congress.

    • The Wanderer

      It’ll be nice, but the knives are out up in Tallahassee. (p)Rick Scott and his goons are not going to let her seat go blue.

      • eyelashviper

        Miami pays little attention to Tallahassee, and the county is becoming more blue, due to the die off of old Batista hold outs, and younger Latinos taking over the political system.

        • The Wanderer

          Excellent.

        • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

          Dammit. I should have scrolled down a smidge

    • janecita

      Also kissing up to Israel, she loves Netanyahu.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      She just concentrated on citizens who grew sugar and made rum out of it.

      • eyelashviper

        The Fanjuls, true oligarchs in the Batista style…but here they got lots of guvmint $$$ to enrich them even more.

    • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

      It’ll be interesting to see if the Cuban vote stays reliably R with the downfall of Fidel. I read somewhere that the youngs are not towing the line. Major shift for FL representation.

      • eyelashviper

        It has already changed, quite a bit, and Cubans are no longer the only Latino group in South Florida, and they no longer are devoted to the Goper party, and the “commie” threat is long gone.
        Miami Dade has a big population of Mexican and Central American immigrants, as well as Puerto Ricans and South Americans…

    • SeeTrain65

      Tell her to take any Diaz-Balarts with her.

      • The Wanderer

        All the Diaz-Balarts!

      • eyelashviper

        Lincoln is long gone, and he was worse than she was.
        Jose is a journalist, and is actually pretty good. He started out in Miami, and actually had the audacity to question the anti-Castro loonies, a perilous task.

        • SeeTrain65

          And Mario? Feh.

          • eyelashviper

            Not quite as bad as Lincoln, but a jerkwad.
            Jose is the black sheep of that vile family.

      • cmd resistor

        I can’t remember the exact details but somehow those guys are related to Castro, like nephews through his first wife?

        • SeeTrain65

          From Wikipedia on Mario:

          “Díaz-Balart was born in 1961 in Fort Lauderdale, to Cuban parents, the late Cuban politician Rafael Díaz-Balart, and his wife, Hilda Caballero Brunet. His aunt, Mirta Díaz-Balart, was the first wife of Fidel Castro. Her son, and his cousin, is Fidel Ángel “Fidelito” Castro Díaz-Balart. His uncle is the Cuban-Spanish painter, Waldo Díaz-Balart. His brother, Lincoln Díaz-Balart, represented Florida’s 21st District from 1993 to 2011. He has two other brothers, José Díaz-Balart, a journalist, and Rafael Díaz-Balart, a banker.”

    • cmd resistor

      I have never had a kind word to say about her until recently when she came out and said she would not vote for the stupid Trumpcare bill because it would hurt her constituents. Apparently there are quite a few dems in her district.

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        Enough that as soon as her resignation hit the tracking services flipped her seat from “likely R” to “leans D” for 2018.

      • eyelashviper

        She began to change her tune a bit, when she got real opposition in elections, and once Castro died, she no longer had a boogey man to rail against, and had to deal with some real issues.
        There is no longer a Gop lock on the Cuban vote in South Florida.

        • cmd resistor

          I remember some of the younger Cubans coming out for Obama, I think it was 2008. They don’t have that same anti-Castro foaming at the mouth thing their parents did.

  • VirginiaLady

    Baby otters are pure. Spend a few minutes with them only and no crazy making humans.

  • MynameisBlarney

    I swear, there are some very tone-deaf people on this site.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Do you feel strongly enough about it to address who they are and what they’re missing, or should we all just feel a little uncomfortable?

      • MynameisBlarney

        Someone kept going after Anna asked them to stop with the transgender “jokes” about Ann Coulter.
        So she deleted her profile.

        • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

          Goddammit

          • MynameisBlarney

            Yeah, and I was ALREADY in a shitty fucking mood this morning.

          • HazooToo

            Where was this? What article and how far down? I want a piece of this jerk.

          • jesterpunk

            Its in this thread below the Anthropology comment.

          • HazooToo

            Thank you, going now.

          • MynameisBlarney

            This article, not very far down.

        • Carpe Vagenda

          Oh dear.

          ☁️🌥🌦⛅️🌤☀️, Anna.

        • fucking hell.

        • Courser_Resistance

          Christ, this is the second time in a week! Fuck!

          • SeeTrain65

            I was about to say the same thing. Word for word.

          • MynameisBlarney

            I know.
            I’m fuckin pissed.

          • Yr. Gma

            I think this is her way of protecting herself. She needs to do what works for her. I hope she’ll be back, but I certainly understand why she felt the need to do something definitive in the face of bigotry.

        • HazooToo

          What the fuck?!

        • Ω cynmac will never surrender

          Today?

          • MynameisBlarney

            Yup

    • jesterpunk

      What the hell, its not hard to respect someone when they say something bothers them. What an asshole, I hope she comes back.

    • Suttree

      I missed it, but I will protect Anna with all of my soul!

    • Yr. Gma

      I block them when they make themselves known. There are some people on this site who just get on my last of the last nerves, so rather than engage with their nonsense, I have blocked them. I don’t think I’m missing out on anything.

  • SweetDeeKat

    I enjoyed hearing about transportation department turd Pugliese who ordered all outgoing mail to be blocked, then forgot to lift the order. First google search result: “Pugliese.. made it clear he isn’t running from the fact that he was prosecuted and jailed for creating phony invoices to steal millions from his onetime real estate partner.”

  • Suttree

    Step two, I have ordered my new health insurance cards.

  • James

    Not nice for me to come to Wonkette and open the non-comments to a flashing gif designed to trigger people’s epilepsy (like mine).

    I was going to come enjoy the non-commenting, but now I’m going to have to go back to bed to nurse a migraine.

    • Sorry, James :hugs:
      Edit: Don’t see any flashing gifs myself, but for the future; the arrow next to your sort by newest should give you a drop down where you can “hide all media” so things do not instantly open unless you want them to.

      • Yr. Gma

        It was way back at the opening of the non-comments. It was a flashing coffee cup. Thanks for the heads-up, James. I will be careful to avoid flashing gifs in the future (though I don’t think I’ve ever done it.)

    • HazooToo

      AGH! I rarely ever post gifs, but I will make sure they don’t flash when I do. I hope it goes away soon.

    • If you use firefox, you can disable all autoplay features. It makes .gif’s and streaming videos a little funky, but it also saves bandwith.

  • Magyar Has Had It With Trump

    I know I have skirted the line (or sprinted over it) making stupid comments about people I despise. But TS/TG “jokes” are shit and need to be treated as such, especially when you get called out on it.

    • HazooToo

      People can only learn from their mistakes when they’re willing to. Doesn’t look like THAT guy is willing to learn jack shit.

  • Suttree

    Step three: I called the DMV and figured out what sort of shit I need to bring to get a new ID.

    It is New Jersey and they have a stupid point system because of 9/11.
    I hate the DMV!

    • jesterpunk

      They make it really difficult for no real reason, the only thing I liked about living in NJ was the free inspections and not having to pump gas. Good luck.

      • Suttree

        Thanks brother! Or sister?

        • jesterpunk

          I am a middle aged guy.

          • Suttree

            Me too also. I have better hair than my father though.

    • Jeffery Campbell

      Little known fact: The NJ DMV is the model for Guantanamo.

      • Suttree

        Every DMV in New Jersey has “guards” in uniform hustling you into lines. And they will throw you the fuck out if you do not obey their stupid commands.

        • Jeffery Campbell

          Indeed and with good reason. On my very first trip to the NJ DMV to get a DL, I witnessed a fist fight between a person in line ahead of me and an employee who came over the participation to start the brawl. I turned and ran.

          • Suttree

            It’s Jersey. Where can we not get into a fistfight?

          • Jeffery Campbell

            Well, that’s a very good point. It’s certainly not the only one I’ve seen since I got here.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “Begging for undeserved extensions is what got me through college.”
    — Paul Ryan

    • Jeffery Campbell

      Oh, he’s begging for something alright and it is extended.

      • phoenix00

        It won’t be hanging off DT then….

  • Shibusa

    Sebastian Gorka is leaving to spend more time with David Duke family.

  • Suttree

    Step four: I just ordered a new wallet to put this shit into.

  • You guys i am beyond depressed about the ACA crap. I cannot believe this is still going on. It is so dispiriting.

    And malicious.

  • Jeffery Campbell

    Sea otter babby has slayed me with its precious cuteness.

  • Panika MCD

    OT – in TX Sen. Fi. Committee learning about how TRICKLE DOWN WORKS! but it only works if you exempt yachts of $300 thousand or more…WE NEED TO NOT TAX $4 MILLION BOATS! or that’s just the dumbest thing I’ve heard all week and it’s only Monday.

    • BeachBum

      Texas. Land of Steers and ………Greedy Republicans !

      • Panika MCD

        think about the poor pitiful detailers and sound system installers you just put out of a job!

        just kidding. it should be noted that the exemption is already law in FL, so they are truly the greedy ones. the same bill passed the TX Senate in 2015, but failed to go anywhere in the House because, thank goodness, no all Republicans are greedy. and we’re in a budget shortfall this session so I doubt it will even get that far this time.

        in any case, it is Dead Bill Week in the Pink Dome where most of the bills if they are still in the committee in the chamber they originated in are pretty much dead so we get to hear ALL THE CRAZY this week. it’s gonna be fun.

  • Ω cynmac will never surrender
  • BeachBum

    Re the Budget Agreement. To a large extent we did kick the can down the road. I have tried to understand the big points of it from fake news, and if true, I think the Dems got more out of it than the GOP, and way more out of it than what Trump said he was gonna do. Yes, there was a lot of compromise, but Trumps main issues were stopped cold. This may even be a Dem victory considering the Congress and WH are GOP controlled. I say great job to Nancy and Chuck !

    • jesterpunk

      Dems got funding for planned parenthood, increased funding for science, partial reimbursement for Trump’s security at Mar-a-Lago and for Melon in NYC, and added a line that says Trump cant build his stupid wall. That is a win even if its a short term spending bill.

  • BeachBum

    Rant of the Day. I don’t understand some people. If you have lived a while, you have had problems and challenges and huge mountains to climb to accomplish any thing or to just survive. If by some miracle your life has been so gawddammed perfect in EVERY possible way, then try and understand the rest of humankind’s condition and maybe have some empathy. Or at least don’t be a fuckingasshole. I’m done. For Today. Maybe. Maybe not. We’ll see.

  • So here’s my plan: Since Trump can’t get funding for his WALL, we should convince every Republican to mail him a brick.

    Who’s in?

  • Nigel Poncewattle

    Jesus — I’m 58. Not sure I can sit here and wish for these four years to be over with soon. I don’t have too many of these four year periods left. :-( This sucks.

  • David Chaillou

    I’ve been reading the transcript of Trump’s interview on CBS. The fucking moron is basically saying that his job would be easier in a dictatorship, because all these democratic rules are “archaic”. Can you fucking believe it? When the fuck will the Senate do its job and put the fucking moron on trial for treason, for deliberately trying to subvert the Constitution?

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