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When Bill O’Reilly was shitcanned from Fox News this month for accidentally calling his female coworkers on the phone to masturbate at them, over and over again, for decades, to the tune of $13 million in settlements, the Powers That Be made sure his idiot racist sidekick, Jesse Watters, would have a soft landing. They gave him a slot on Fox New’s hip, edgy politix show for youths, The Five.

It took less than a week for Watters to not make a blowjob joke about Ivanka Trump, into whose purty mouth he would definitely never think about sticking his penis.

Watters: Yeah it’s funny, the left says they really respect women, then when given an opportunity to respect a woman like that, they boo and hiss. So I don’t really get what’s going on here, but uh, I really liked [mimes holding a microphone] how she was speaking into that microphone.

HM ER HUH COUPLE THINGS.

1. Jesse Watters is as stupid as the Prison Planet guy from Alex Jones’s Infowars, who thought feminists were being hypocritical for not just voting with their vaginas and supporting actual fascist Marine Le Pen.

It’s not disrespecting women to boo one who’s claiming DONALD TRUMP is good for women, when his policies are even worse for the ladies than his common pussburgling.

presidential portrait

2. We know you don’t really “get what’s going on here.” Because you are not really that bright.

3. Only you, Jesse Watters, or possibly any other man who’s ever appeared on Fox News, could end a sentence about how other people aren’t respecting women, by verbally stating disagreement with her ideas, with where you would like to stick your dick.

4. Nobody believes you were talking about her “smooth jazz radio voice.” Including other Republicans.

5. Should have paid attention to what happened to President Bannon when he called his boss’s daughter’s husband “a cuck,” meaning “a man who wants to watch dudes get it on with his boss’s daughter.” Fox doesn’t need to keep you around for decades despite how gross you are, because you’re no Bill O’Reilly, and eventually neither was he.

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  • Anna Elizabeth

    These fucking Fox and Friends Fucksticks.

  • schmannity

    Watters would be a frat boy except except for those meanies in the rush committee.

  • Chadwells
    • Teecha

      this is never not funny.

  • Edith Prickly

    Fox News, keeping the “ass” in class.

  • chimichanga

    This is a young Neanderthal riding a dying demographic who thinks insults are humor. Many people have had parents that would insult their children and then say “I was just joking.” That behavior is incredibly destructive and packaging it for public consumption tells you all you need to know about the Fox audience.

    • kareemachan

      And it’s totally passive-aggressive.

    • jesterpunk

      Its not even good insults either. You can do insults and have them be funny like this

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=urdf4g-LXk4

      They cant even do that.

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    Yeah it’s funny, the left says they really respect women, then when given an opportunity to respect a woman like that, they boo and hiss.

    Oh? What, exactly, has Ivanka Trump accomplished on her own merit?

    • snigsy

      Exactly–“merit” is the key word.

    • snark-lurker

      What has she accomplished?PERIOD end of sentence not a joke

    • therblig

      did soros pay for all those leftists’ tickets to germany? because i sure as hell didn’t get mine.

    • Shibusa

      She does the breathy phone sex worker voice pretty well.

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Point of Order: β€œa man who want to watch dudes get it on with his boss’s daughter.”

    When they say “cuck”, it’s not just watching the wife have sex with other men, Hell, I’d be down for that.

    They want to be humiliated in every way as the wife has sex with other men. It’s not fun, Swinging sexxy times, it’s about degradation, humiliation, and dehumanization. Pretty much a Reich-winger’s Playbook, of course.

    • hendenburg2

      I’m stealing “Reich-winger”, by the by

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Steal away, I didn’t coin it, but I’m most happy to pass it along. :)

  • snigsy

    Some days I wonder what my life would be like if I had or were a dick, but most other days I think “nah.”

    • BosGrl

      I always think of Elaine on Seinfeld: “I don’t know how you walk around with those things.”

      • snigsy

        High-five to you!

    • snark-lurker

      if you had a dick, half your brain would be in your junk, i am purdy sure about that, i think, i guess, i dunno

      • ViveLaResistance!

        Some men actually grow up and learn to use their prefrontal cortex to become thoughtful, civil beings. Others never reach this stage. They apparently “grow up” to become President…

  • schmannity

    “In October 2016, Watters was criticized for a segment of “Watters’ World” that was widely considered racist against Asian Americans.[9][10][11] In New York City’s Chinatown, Watters asked Chinese Americans if they knew karate, if he should bow before he greets them, or if their watches were stolen.[10][12] Throughout the segment, the 1974 song “Kung Fu Fighting” plays in the background, and the interviews are interspersed with references to martial arts and clips of Watters getting a foot massage and playing with nunchucks.”

    I didn’t watch the segment, but was Barry White playing in the background?

    • BosGrl

      I forgot that was him. What a jerk.

  • OrG

    Don’t let the door hit ya on the way out,dumbass.

  • BadKitty904

    Classic GOP SOP: Pretend to defend women’s rights, while actually insulting women.

    • HazooToo

      In the same breath.

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        And don’t forget “act offended when the victim complains”. “What’s the matter, sugar tits? Can’t take a little joke?”

        • HazooToo

          “It’s your fault for ____________.” Of course, no one ever tells them it’s they’re fault women are repelled by their words/clothes/looks.

      • BadKitty904

        They have a natural gift for dumbfuckery.

  • MississippiLefty

    Why exactly are we meant to respect Ivanka Trump? Her behavior is reprehensible.

    • DainBramage

      There is zero evidence that she disagrees with her father on any issue.

      • Christopher Story

        Including his issue with wanting to have sex with her.

        • DainBramage

          Ewwwwww!

    • Nockular cavity

      She’s a grifter ripping off the public wealth like the rest of her wretched klan.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Since Donald seems to think his family has “superior genes” then I guess Ivanka’s deplorable behavior is genetically linked.

        Also, too, so much for the theory that Donald has “superior genes”.

  • maxneanderthal

    Jesse Watters? Isn’t that an abandoned water hole somewhere in the Australian Outback, ringed with bleached cattle bones?

    • snigsy

      Tha’s right, mate!

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      No jolly swagman camping by that billabong…

  • elviouslyqueer

    Between this asshole and Chris “Starbursts” Cillizza, it makes me almost feel sorry for Ivanka.

    I’m not saying I ever would, but I almost do.

  • exinkwretch

    The reasons this country is fucked: Too many dumbfucks getting their “news” from “Fox News” and getting their “Christianity” from Pat Robertson.

    • Christopher Story

      And John Hagee; who incidentally is currently touring my neck of the woods with his branded troupe of Christian “entertainers.”

      • elviouslyqueer

        Is he the coat-flinging guy who looks like Benny Hill?

        • Christopher Story

          Actually, he does look a lot like Benny Hill!

  • Joe Beese

    It’s natural for us to emulate our idols. Watters idolizes Trump. Trump fantasizes about sodomizing Ivanka. So Watters fantasizes about sodomizing Ivanka.

    • Chadwells

      This would make a good flow chart.

      • WotsAllThisThen

        I need to see that diagram with arrows showing all the ins and outs.

  • schmannity

    Heckava Job, Murdoch Sons!

  • baconzgood

    Douche bag.

  • WotsAllThisThen

    I’m sure Bannon was surprised people took his “cuck” comment so seriously. Among the alt-right, that’s a term of endearment.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Yeah it’s funny, the left says they really respect women, then when given an opportunity to respect a woman like that, they boo and hiss.

    Funny how we liberals don’t give women a pass when they try to dress up their misogynist father as an enlightened feminist, isn’t it?

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/3c982036a46d7172fe614d9d312ad1a4c401dee2a93d98baa6ea366a4d3b72d5.jpg

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Even funnier he’s basically saying “Here, I’m giving you an opportunity to respect this woman.”

      I guess we should be grateful to be given such an opportunity?

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Gee, who knew you daft women would care about “issues” and stuff, right?

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      I still am reeling over the insistence that “we” should “respect” someone who he immediately completely demeans with the microphone remark.

  • laughingnome

    It’s terrible. Ivanka’s over there taking it on the chin and this guy is jealous.

    • Oblios_Cap

      But not on the chin like he’s thinking.

      • laughingnome

        Well, you never know.

  • Gayer Than Thou

    Say, you know who else has a smooth jazz radio voice?

    • laughingnome

      Al Jareau?

    • BosGrl

      Venus Flytrap?

      • leemoder

        One of the greatest lines in TV history:

        “Oh, I don’t know, Herb. How DO you get paint off a frog?”

        • BosGrl

          “As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly.”

    • Anna Rompage

      Pee Wee Herman?

      • Oblios_Cap

        Mel Torme?

    • BearGHAZI

      Not Louie Armstrong. I can’t stand that guy

    • elviouslyqueer

      Delilah?

    • An Outhouse for the Resistance

      Alex Jones?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Sean Hannity?

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Cab Calloway?

    • Christopher Story

      Satan?

  • Oblios_Cap

    Once Adam took that bite out of the apple and lied about it, it’s been all downhill for women. As a man, I have to say I’m sorry.

  • schmannity

    Daddy! Drone him!

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Nice try, Wattie, but it’s no terrorist fist jab”.

  • elviouslyqueer

    So-called “feminists” are trying to block people voting for a woman.

    She would be the first female president of France.

    Let that sink in.

    So-called “journalist” forgets that being a feminist and voting for a woman are two mutually exclusive things.

    She is also so completely far-right that she could easily be mistaken for Hitler’s scrotum. He would be A Idiot, also too.

    Let that sink in.

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      She’s no feminist champion, that’s for sure.

    • Gayer Than Thou

      Ironically, voting for a women simply because she is a woman is the kind of thing a “so-called feminist” would probably do.

    • Dg Hacket

      Funny, I didn’t hear him saying the same for Hillary

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    • BosGrl

      Because [women] all think the same and any time a [woman] insults/harms/votes against another [woman] it proves the theory that the problem is really with the [women].

      *[insert any group here]

  • Anna Rompage

    Jesse Fuckpuke ClownDick; yeah, that was the guy who actually went on national TV and put forth the thought that if he goes out on a date with a woman, and she orders something expensive (like lobster), that she is massively indebted to him and should be required to have sex with him

    • Oblios_Cap

      What if it’s something cheap? Is he required to yank it himself?

      • Indivisible Snark Tank

        Nah. To guys like this, even a Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger from the dollar menu rates at least a blowjob.

        • Bmaccnm

          I will never understand this thought pattern. If I don’t want it in my vagina, I sure as hell don’t want it in my mouth.

    • maxneanderthal

      This guy isn’t Alan Partridge by any chance?
      https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Alan_Partridge

    • DainBramage

      Guys like that should just give up and order “escorts.”

      • Prof. T. Green Bastard

        He thinks $25 worth of seabug meat should buy him a woman for the night. Bitch can’t afford a pro!

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Everything about sex is a transaction with these things like him.

          • Prof. T. Green Bastard

            In my perfect, utopian world, irredeemable pieces of shit like this couldn’t get laid for any price.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            That is a Utopia! :D

            To these kinds of guys, we have no agency, no desire for sexual pleasures of our own, we’re just to be used to please male ego.

          • Prof. T. Green Bastard

            Take what joy you can from that false sense of superiority while it lasts, throwbacks. Bitches are getting louder not quieter.

            http://ic.pics.livejournal.com/war_machine_rox/9981539/496068/496068_600.gif

          • Anna Elizabeth

            XD Indeed!

      • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

        It’s not about the service the escorts provide–it’s about wanting power over someone, innit?

        • DainBramage

          Yes, I’m sure you’re right. Hateful little a-holes, they are.

      • Anna Rompage

        Guys like this should be draft and sent to go fight ISIS with nothing but a loin cloth & a Chinese made replica boy scout knife…

        • DainBramage

          The problem is they’d be too easily recruited.

          • ViveLaResistance!

            They’d hear the “72 virgins” pitch and say “Sign me up!”. Only later would they realize that there’s one little catch….

  • calliecallie

    Watters the matter with that guy?

    • Nounverb911

      He’s jealous O’Reilly didn’t take him with him when he got fired?

      • beatbort

        And now he’s all washed up

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      He saw BillO’s payout and wants some of that sweet settlement dough?

      • Nounverb911

        But all Watters will get for harassing Ivanka is an all expenses paid trip to Gitmo…

  • baconzgood

    Does he know he’s on TV?

    • Nounverb911

      It’s not TV, it’s Fox.

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      Good to see you! We’ve missed you here!

      • weejee

        even my avatar say hi

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Yeah, but he’ll deny what the tape proves anyway.

    • DainBramage

      Just imagine how he and his buddies talk when they’re not being recorded.

    • Oblios_Cap

      well? what’s going on?

      • baconzgood

        The world sucks.

        • Oblios_Cap

          Ah. I see. Damn.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          It’s not overs yet, Baconz. Hold on. I *know* it’s hard.

        • Clown of Thorns

          That’s just gravity.

    • BosGrl

      It never stopped all those people on Cops.

      • Msgr_MΞ©ment

        Whatcha gonna do?

        • Painter of Goats

          But I’d rather not watch when he come for you.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    I will say I am amused and amazed that FOX News can’t seem to let a single day pass without doing something tone-deaf about women since BillO got the boot. Guess those wingnuts will never learn FFS.

    • OrG

      Amused? Yes. Amazed………?

      • Resistance Fighter Callyson

        I thought they would be able to control themselves for about a week before reverting to their misogynist ways. Guess I was pretty naive.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      It’s ingrained in the corporate culture of the place. Which is why it must be annihilated.

    • DainBramage

      It’s what their viewers want.

  • weejee
    • Gayer Than Thou

      In this comic, does the devolution go left to right, or right to left?

      • Oblios_Cap

        Yes.

    • Msgr_MΞ©ment

      CHILDREN! Don’t make me turn this car country around!

  • Look Closer
    • schmannity

      Yeah, but it’s a 57 hour week, so they’re doing OK.

      –Daddy Trump

    • jesterpunk

      “Well if those Chinese wanted better pay they would just pull themselves up by their bootstraps and be born rich”

      Republicans

      • Bmaccnm

        And Norwegian.

    • chazmanr

      Yes, but at least they get guaranteed health care.

  • Msgr_MΞ©ment

    “…but uh, I really liked [mimes holding a microphone] how she was speaking into that microphone.”

    I mean, I would really lurve for her to make me a sammich.

  • Rhonda

    Just for happy times
    https://youtu.be/da5tjfpKyac

  • HogeyeGrex

    I still say someone should hire him to follow BillO around and harass him about being fired. You know he’d do it.

  • Much as I loathe the Trumps and everything they stand for, no woman deserves to have some asshole talk about her like that. I hope Fox fires him.

  • Vincent Ricola

    Ah the blowjob mouth joke, the old standby for unfunny dudes who are trying desperately to impress an audience who are too sophisticated for “pull my finger.”

    • weejee

      For his audience the ‘finger’ joke probably still has some miles left.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      I’ve had my own brother make that kind of joke to me.

  • Professor Fate

    Amazing Bill gets booted, then- we get testimony that the boss at Fox had a secret door to keep brown people out, Fox is being sued for systematic racism towards black employees and now when the world is paying attention this clown comes on and talks about how much he’d like oral sex from the PRESIDENT’s Daughter. You know something I despise Trump with the heat of a thousand suns but even I draw lines – but no this boob went over that line and is now trying not to get fired. One wonders when the harassment suits against him start coming out.
    Meantime I anxious await the news that Fox News paid for hookers. You know it’s coming. You just know it.

  • Ezio

    Unless you’re talking about Shep Smith, then isn’t “Fox Idiot” kind of redundant?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Fair point. How Shep can stand the smell of that place I can’t imagine.

      • Ezio

        If there’s racism and sexism at Fox, then surely there’s homophobia. They must be paying him a lot of money…

  • Elvis Causticfellow

    Uh, what did happen to President Bannon when he called his boss’s daughter’s husband β€œa cuck”?

  • TundraGrifter

    I’m guessing Jesse “Bad” Watters has said a few words to the folks.

    • Ezio

      Jesse Twatters is more like it.

  • jesterpunk

    OT but President Jared might be going down soon too.

    https://twitter.com/AndreaWNYC/status/857298922599010304

  • Msgr_MΞ©ment

    That blonde anti-LePen protester’s ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to her newsletter.

    Is it illustrated?

  • Indivisible Snark Tank

    This guy is a disgrace to everyone else named “Watters” or “Waters”. Maxine….John….Roger….Muddy…

    • Msgr_MΞ©ment

      Still…

  • Why Pox is so special is that when they drop their dicks in the dirt, they pick them up and put them in their mouths. But not in the good microphone way.

  • jesterpunk

    Fox do you ever learn about sexual harassment? That pussy grab tape wasnt an instruction manual it was supposed to be what not to do.

    • Jamoche

      Which part of Fox? The non-FoxNews part is using it as a “what not to do” tape. Fox News, however… who knows?

  • proudgrampa

    Good grief. Is this Stupid People Day?

    • Nounverb911

      24/7

      • ViveLaResistance!

        52/10/100/1000…

        My father, a good progressive, always says that the bounds of human stupidity have yet to be even remotely reached.

    • jesterpunk

      It is stupid people years, somehow voters where ok with this stuff.

    • MynameisBlarney

      Every day is stupid people day at Fox

    • Master Contrail Program

      You mean in the Biblical sense?

    • Suttree

      Yes. Every day is stupid people day.

  • Shucking and Cucking and Jiving….

    It’s what all those lazy rich Fox News bastards do all day long.
    https://www.forwardprogressives.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/awkward-moment-donald-trump.jpg

    • Pilotshark

      also the realization that your mother is maybe unstable.

  • hendenburg2

    Here’s something interesting and I hope Robyn and WHTM write something, but apparently the r/Redpill was founded by a GOP congressman.

    http://uproxx.com/technology/reddit-red-pill-founder/

    • Jamoche

      In New Hampshire, which has 400 of them – one for every 3000 people.

  • Suttree

    I am sick of people defending Ivanka because she is a woman. She is a fucking terrible person. Period The fact that she is a woman does not make her any better.

    • jowgajen

      But, Marine le Pen would be the first lady president of France.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Wait, who’s defending? Watters is an unfunny frat-boy dickhead, and Ivanka is a soulless corporate shill. These conditions are not mutually exclusive.

      • Suttree

        I have heard people defending her. Fuck Watter’s and the horse.

      • Thiazin Red

        There seems to be a thing going around among allegedly liberal guys defending Ivanka and shitting on Chelsea Clinton.

    • jesterpunk

      Jon Oliver covered that last weekend.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wD8AwgO0AQI

      • Suttree

        I am going to vomit right now.

        • jesterpunk

          From people defending Ivanka and Jared or from your back?

          • Suttree

            Both.

      • Shibusa

        That’s the best bit I’ve ever seen JO do. Loved it.

    • Red Bird Ξ©

      I have to agree with you on this. The same goes for Melania. Neither of them was forced to be vocal in their support of Trump. They could have faded into the background and let him run the show. But they both defended him. So, enjoy what you help to create, ladies.

      • Suttree

        Yup. Fuck them!

    • BearDeLaOursistance

      True enough, but shouldn’t that just make it all the easier to target something besides sex/gender?

  • Rick Hill

    All of you here are SO sexist for making fun of a MAN who was just speaking his natural, gawd given rights to be a man and oogle the hawtties!!11! So typical of racist, slave owning, christian killing fornicators!!1

    If you didn’t read the subtext: Argle and two blargles

  • Lance Thrustwell

    She looked like she was holding the mic pretty normally to me. I have no problem with bawdy humor, but strained, out-of-place jokes are not funny.

  • Shibusa

    What a revolting human being. Bleck.

  • TheGrandWazoo2

    Watching the TV machine today, the message I’m getting from Republicans is “we’re going to destroy health care and make trickle down work this time for sure even if it kills you all.”

    • jesterpunk

      Killing poor people isn’t a bug it’s a feature for them.

  • Chadwells

    I’ve heard this joke a million thousand times on set. It’s not subtle and everyone knows exactly what he was inferring.

  • Jamoche

    Six months ago, I’d have wondered how someone could be so stupid. Thanks, Trumpie!
    http://www.askamanager.org/2017/04/my-intern-told-a-horribly-offensive-joke-at-a-meeting-with-other-companies.html#comments

    Intern tells 9/11 “joke” at a business meeting with other companies. To make it worse, one of the people there had a family member killed that day.

  • MynameisBlarney
    • weejee

      And Rachel would kick his ass in one-on-one roundball.

      • MynameisBlarney

        She’d kick his ass in one-on-one anything.

  • Anna Elizabeth

    OT Yays! The water is back on. If I can at least do some chores, it makes it easier to get thru my anxieties.

    • jesterpunk
      • Anna Elizabeth

        Well, I’m working the problems, anyway. And I would want water shut off if it were my apartment that was being leaked in. :)

    • Nounverb911
      • Anna Elizabeth

        Nice! Thank you!

    • Suttree

      Yay! I am happy for you! I am going through back spasms but I finalized my PT appointment for Monday.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Thanx Suttree, I am so sorry you’re hurting, but I’m glad yu have your appointment. ~hugs~

    • ViveLaResistance!

      Been there. No water sux big-time.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        It’s been 3 days, off-and-on. But, I lived in a place where management let my bathroom get flooded all day, so I would rather they do this.

        It’s challenging when all my food has to be cooked though.

  • Wild Cat

    Everyone will moralize, then watch ‘The Simpsons’ or FX or Fox Sports 1 and 2 or jerkoff to ’24’ or buy one of his magazines or newspapers or or link into his sites or watch one of his movies or . . . well, they’ll give Murdoch and his cohorts a shitload of $$$ one way or the other.

    They own everything.

    • Chadwells

      I refuse to cut NatGeo series’ anymore solely because that climate denying trash family bought it.

    • Vincent Ricola

      guiltily presses ‘x’ on open It’s Always Sunny tab

    • Lance Thrustwell

      I will confess to really liking the first few seasons of 24. Tight plotting, tho a little reliant on certain repeated plot devices.

      • Shibusa

        Yes–like why did terrorists only seem to want to blow up Los Angeles? And why didn’t anybody but Jack Bauer do any actual work?

    • Thiazin Red

      I’ve mostly given up on the Simpsons, but Fox does have me with Bob’s Burgers.

    • JohnBull

      “The Simpsons” was fantastic–up to season 9.

  • Beanz&Berryz

    I get the “that woman” joke/reference.

    • Thaumaturgist

      I didn’t get the “that woman” joke/reference. Nor did I get the “holds the microphone ” thing by myself. But when you put “that woman” together with “holds the microphone,” I get it.

      • Beanz&Berryz

        Put them together?

  • MynameisBlarney

    http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-088e3Y1TuWw/T0gZaBdKNWI/AAAAAAACp2k/t0rjxH_A4uM/s400/volkswagen-imperial-walker.jpg

    When I’m Benevolent Dictator, everyone’s gonna get one of these!
    And The Empire is gonna pay for ’em!

    • Anna Elizabeth

      That’s awesome! “Lord Vader, the Roadside Hot Dog Stand is in sight. You may start your landing.”

      • MynameisBlarney

        “I’ll take 3 Red Hots and a diet coke”
        *vader breathing*

        • Anna Elizabeth

          “Yes, My Lord”

          *snickers* Diet, who is he kidding?

          “General, the comms are still open.”

          *urkkk*

    • Thiazin Red

      Tempting offer, but what sort of uniforms will your dictatorship have? Thats a pretty big concern of mine.

      • MynameisBlarney
        • Thiazin Red

          10/10 would overthrow the government and join up.

        • hendenburg2

          okay, 1 quick question: did you already have that saved somewhere, or did you search for it (and if so, what the f*** were you googling)?

          • MynameisBlarney

            No, I googled “fashion fails” and looked for the most ridiculous one.

          • hendenburg2

            well that’s anticlimactic… XD

          • MynameisBlarney

            lol

      • BearDeLaOursistance

        I’m defecting to Gayer Than Thou’s dictatorship. I like those uniforms quite a bit better.

    • hendenburg2
      • Anna Elizabeth

        The only Stormtrooper than knew his head from his ass, you mean? XD

        • hendenburg2

          Ha! according to Star Wars canon, his name is Davin Felth. He was an AT-AT pilot who realized that they were vulnerable to being tripped by cables wrapped around the legs. He brought this to the attention of then-Colonel Veers and was demoted to the Stormtroopers keep the flaw a secret.

          He also killed his commanding officer to buy enough time for R2 and Threepio to escape Mos Eisley.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Oh yeah, “Tales of the Mos Eisley Cantina”, I used to have that. :)

          • hendenburg2

            Still, he has nothing on Ice Cream Maker Guy

  • William
  • Mavenmaven

    The level of discourse on the right is about where one would expect it to be.

  • Shibusa

    From @20Committee:
    If Fox fires all the creeps, weirdos, cranks, Putin-huggers and former-sportscaster morons….who’s left?

    • snark-lurker

      crickets

    • Vincent Ricola

      Shep Smith?

      • Mehmeisterjr

        And the night cleaning crew.

        EDIT: By whom I mean, the people who clean the joint overnight, not the on-air “talent.”

  • Thiazin Red

    This reminds me of the republican stance on mental health care. They only care about mental health care when they can use it as an excuse to not do anything about gun violence.

    Similarly, they only care about sexism when they want to call feminist hypocrites for criticizing a woman.

  • JustPixelz (((Ξ©)))

    Watters needs to be on a couch in a short skirt.

    • snark-lurker

      now…you…!

    • Prof. T. Green Bastard

      Tweedle-Dee lookin motherfucker probably doesn’t have the legs for it.

      • hendenburg2

        Well, he’s certainly no Jamie Farr

    • hendenburg2

      why would you subject human beings to that?

      (having to see watters in a short skirt)

  • WotsAllThisThen

    Look, Buster, only the President is allowed to make sex jokes about Ivanka.

  • For NY Wonkers, I’ve just seen this tweet
    https://twitter.com/GeorgeTakei/status/857272567895388161

    • hendenburg2

      As long as he leaves behind the intern who came up with that pun, I’d go.

      • timpundit

        It’s always pun pun pun with George. (I am tired of it too)

        • hendenburg2

          “And he’ll make pun pun puns till Zucky takes the f-book away..”

    • Anna Elizabeth

      “He that would Pun would pick a Pocket.”

  • Red Bird Ξ©

    It’s amazing how society says some women deserve respect but others don’t. This is meaningless if the rest of American women who have to deal with sexual harassment at work still have to put up with it. :(

  • Crystalclear12

    Keeping Fox classy I see.
    I was worried after O’Reilly left about the quality.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    And, speaking of free speech that isn’t free,

    https://twitter.com/xeni/status/857307085872222208

    • jesterpunk

      Damn so now its a conspiracy from conservative groups too?

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I think now that the pro-Trump ‘protesters’ who shot somebody in Berkeley are in court because there’s proof that the Mercer-sponsored speaker was backed by violent ‘protesters’ organized by the Mercer-sponsored Breitbart, the Mercers have probably realized how very deep their pockets really are. And that discovery is a stone bitch.

    • Vincent Ricola

      Gee, it’s almost like this whole situation was a gigantic attention grab from a well-known trollish asshole. First amendment, tho, I guess.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      So sad for you, Nazi trollop.

    • Undocumented Skwerl!

      Aww snowflakes.

    • Shanzgood

      Haha!

    • jesterpunk

      Is it wrong to post the clips from Rob Lowe’s roast where they where making fun of Ann Coulter anytime she is brought up?

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zwoGrDa5g2c

      • Anna Elizabeth

        No, it’s not wrong. :)

      • MynameisBlarney

        I thought she was gonna cry at some of those.

        • jesterpunk

          Well if she did cry she could always use her white sheets to dry her tears.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        If remembering fondly when Ann Coulter’s mothlike attraction to attention sent her careening into a marquee’s worth of lightbulbs is wrong, I don’t want to be right.

    • Wild Cat

      Gives her more time to be buggered by J.J.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I can’t begin to express to you the extent to which I, unlike Ann Coulter, believe in the right to privacy, and I believe that those two deserve the most privacy ever.

    • georgiaburning

      If she really believes in free speech why was she charging $20k?

      • Ξ© cynmac will never surrender

        The security costs at 20K. That’s why they were trying to get her to talk off campus and next week when there aren’t any classes.

        • georgiaburning

          NY Times stated that her speaker’s fee was $20K and that 17K of that was being paid by Young America’s Foundation.
          It is very normal to require campus groups to pay for or provide extra security for events that can be reasonably expected to draw significant attendance from outside the university community. (Phrasing that as nicely as I can.) Usually it’s heavy metal or rap concerts

          • Ξ© cynmac will never surrender

            I did n’t hear about the speaker’s fees. I thought that the fees were only for security. that’s insane to expect a campus group to come up with that kind of cash.

          • georgiaburning

            $20K is 400 fifty-dollar tickets. But that’s just a fee, not other expenses. For comparison, Sarah Palin got $75K for a speech at Cal State Stanislaus in 2010 PLUS first class travel and a top level hotel.

            This whole thing is a publicity stunt, and there’s certain to be some right-wing fundraising group making bank on “Fight UC suppression of First Amendment Rights.”

    • HazooToo

      aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahahaaaaaa

    • Weird, it is like if she is not getting paid, she suddenly does not care if she free speeches at those liberals!

  • MynameisBlarney
  • Kiri the Unicorn

    OT- today’s weird project. Leo Hebner (RIP) owned an umbrella that had a deer hoof for a handle, which is creepy, as is wanting it framed also too. At least the cat skull I framed a few months back had dignity. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/fc2edae96bf888ef0045473da6862d7f230e4c00e1d04a594489fc57bc8481a4.jpg

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Ick. But, skillfully done as always, Kiri! :)

    • Undocumented Skwerl!

      We used to play with deer legs as kids.

      Shut up.

      • Creepoman

        You had deer legs? Back in my day we were lucky to get the small intestine!

        • Vienna Woods

          Luxury.

    • It’s not like the deer was using it anymore…

    • C4TWOMAN

      I have a cat skull. Poor kitty road kill was left to rot in the sun so long the hide just peeled back and I was able to pop it out. Took forever to clean.

      Hey if I ever start vlogging, I can have it in all my shots like Aurini’s fake skull. Don’t worry, I won’t name it “MacArthur”.

    • Shibusa

      My college roommate had a deer hoof bottle opener.

  • tehbaddr

    So, are blow job jokes not funny anymore? I mean they do involve a dick and are in a sense therefore dick jokes.

    • snark-lurker

      i dunno wut’z ok or not anymoar

      • tehbaddr

        I think it’s safe to laugh at Trump fer sure.

        • snark-lurker

          yeah i guess

          • tehbaddr

            Just don’t laugh at his youngest sprogeny. Wait till he’s a full blown monster like the rest.

          • Villago Delenda Est

            You know it’s coming. The kid isn’t being brought up right…he’s not allowed to be a kid.

          • snark-lurker

            even the mere prospect of speculation is scary

          • Ξ© cynmac will never surrender

            He likes to wear suits all the time, like his dingbat dad. That was a warning sign for me.

          • Vienna Woods

            I don’t think he likes to. I think he’s forced to. Poor little guy.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Basically, it’s about punching up or punching down. Watters’ joke punched down, twice. He insinuated that women shouldn’t ever criticize another woman, then he proved that he sees all women, even the one he is “defending” from criticism, are just objects for his amusement.

        • snark-lurker

          too complicated for me, really. Vanka looked very uncomfortable to me and i had a confuzion of empathy/sympathy/”poor little rich bitch earned that”

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Oh, I hear you. I can’t stand that bitch.

    • Undocumented Skwerl!

      They are, but we let Larry Flint do the celebrity visuals for us.

      What?

    • MynameisBlarney

      I guess it’s all about context, delivery and timing.

      Watters wiffed all 3.

    • timpundit

      Blowjob jokes ar and can be funny. Watters didn’t tell a blowjob joke, he insinuated he wants to put his tiny penis in Ivanka’s mouth because the micrphone looks like a penis (to him). And she was holding it near her mouth.

      If that’s a joke then Steve Crowder is lenny fucking bruce.

      • tehbaddr

        Yes, in that sense, it should be kept for boys will be boys conversation.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      I tell blowjob jokes. It’s just these Fox guys are so sleazy about everything. Have you told a blowjob joke at work, on the clock? That’s what Watters did, plus the rest of this sorry display of his.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      timpundit below is correct. This was not a joke. And blowjob jokes and dick jokes are not acceptable on national TV news, not even good jokes, which this wasn’t. At least, they weren’t until this happened, but with Fox there are no standards, so anything is possible.

  • Lefty Frizzell

    Watters just isn’t funny. Self-aggrandizing, punching down, not witty, clever, or subtle. Just not funny. Like a loud guy in a bar who thinks he’s the alpha dog but everybody else thinks is the jack russell humping your leg.

    Klepper has a similar job but the difference is he’s very good at it and he’s very funny.

    • Stranded Devonian Lungfish

      Jack Russell libelz!!

      • Clyde Barrow

        Seen Jack Russell & Great White open for Dio back in ’96. Great Metal show….and he didn’t try to hump my leg.

  • MeerkatsRMammals

    Was gonna say, “How dare they talk about WH resident’s daughter that way!” Then I remembered…Trump has said even worse about his daughter :(

    • WotsAllThisThen

      “Nobody respects grabbable pussy more than me. I’m the least disrespectful pussy grabber you’ve ever seen.” -DJT

  • Me not sure

    Watters probably had his lunch money taken from him almost every day in school and is taking it out on the world now.

    • Ξ© cynmac will never surrender

      Nah, he’s probably been a smug asshole his whole life.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      Nah, he’s the one who tripped the little kids so the bigger kids could take their lunch money, in exchange for not beating him up.

  • Electric Ukulele Land

    I like imagining the universe where “smooth jazz voice” is exactly what he meant and exactly what everyone else thought when he said it. Except for the part about the smooth jazz, which is an abomination (it is in no way jazz — it is the imitation crab meat of jazz). In fact, come to think of it, that would be hell.

    • Ricky Gay

      Kenny G and the Surimi Three

    • Angela Ruzzo

      If that was what he meant, he would not have used a hand gesture.

      • Electric Ukulele Land

        You make the whole thought experiment a lot less fun if all you do is blatantly poke holes in its underlying premises with things like “facts” and “contradicting evidence” — and this is a thought experiment that already has a significant fun deficit considering its smooth jazz content and the heavy load one must bear already willingly suspending ones disbelief without you piling on ;)

        • Angela Ruzzo

          Well, as my father told me when I was 14, “It just shows to go that you can never tell what you least expect most.” These are words to live by.

  • Lefty Frizzell

    Paul Joseph Watson – I’m letting it sink in. And it feels pretty good, actually.

    • Clyde Barrow

      He’s definitely on the ‘Faces I’d like To Punch’ list.

  • Beanz&Berryz

    The only national monuments that matter or the ones to loser Confederate generals…

  • Lefty Frizzell

    Watters looks like Ross Geller “serial killer edition”.

  • LarryHoudini

    HUH I WONDER WHY HE AND O’REILLY SEEMED TO CLICK.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    So, this is disgusting, but I don’t know why Trump would expect anyone not to treat his daughter disrespectfully when he was so desperate to have Howard Stern’s audience think he was a cocksman that he called her a piece of ass. That’s not sophisticated rabelaisian wit. That’s inviting millions of strange men to contemplate tearing a piece off of your kid.

    • Beanz&Berryz

      I wouldn’t know sophisticated rabelaisian wit from unsophisticated rabelaisian wit, I must confess.

      • Teecha

        I like that I now know the word rabelaisian.

        • Angela Ruzzo

          Warning: It is not a valid word when playing Scrabble.

          • Teecha

            That’s ok. I’m really shit at scrabble so I never play it.

    • Jamoche

      Has Trump even noticed anyone dissing his daughter, or does that only happen on the news that gets filtered before it reaches him?

      • You’d think his head would’ve exploded by now–oh wait, it’s not about HIM.

        • Jamoche

          He’d see the booing in Germany as being about him, because she’s being his extension there. The skeevy bits – ew, well, he’d probably be chuckling along with the skeeves.

          • Sorry, I accidentally down-voted this first. I hope it doesn’t hold it against you in Disqus.

          • Jamoche

            Nah, downvotes haven’t meant anything since Disqus started hiding the count, and the conspiracy theory on that is they did so because downvotes were having a suppressing effect on the people that the rest of us really wanted to suppress. But all they care about is total hits, not quality :(

            But you can undo a downvote by clicking it again or upvoting.

  • Clyde Barrow

    Why does Great Britain keep pumping out pompous Right Wing internet douche nozzles such as Paul Joseph Watson and Milo Yiannopoulos? I mean, I can see how they would be unemployable in any other facet of life aside from internet bullying and Ad-Hoc conspiracy theories, but does Britain have a nuclear reactor leak in a major aquifer or something, or does acting like the fascists that nearly bombed them off their own island 70 years ago actually sound like a good idea? I just don’t get it.

    • Centuries of practice.

      • Clyde Barrow

        …and inbreeding. That practice continues today in the American South and Utah.

    • Lefty Frizzell

      Stuart Varney!

      • Clyde Barrow

        Varney is an American citizen now.

        Fuck you very much, Great Britain.

      • MynameisBlarney

        Piers Morgan libelz!

        • Jamoche

          Is that even possible?

        • Lefty Frizzell

          ‘sfunny how Morgan came over to the USA, got installed as Larry King’s replacement, and sold himself as Mr Reasonable Centrist With A Common Touch. Coz I remember him as the sleaziest, nastiest, most unlikeable gutter press baron that there ever was.

          • ez

            wasn’t he deep in the Phone hacking scandal?

          • Teecha

            Yep. Filthy bastard.

    • Teecha

      In our defence, we never hear about them until they infest your shores and then they get on telly.

      Feel free to swat any obnoxious little nazis who pop up with a British passport.

      Plus Milo is fairly Greek. We can’t take full responsibility for his stupid and evil ways.

      • Clyde Barrow

        I believe you. I asked some of my English relatives who live in Sunderland what they think of those clowns, and they replied, “Who?”

        • Teecha

          I’d never heard of milo until I started coming here, and this Watson chap is new today.

          We generally take the piss out of neonazis, (as with we do with everyone) so they run away to america where piss taking doesn’t seem to happen in the same way. Plus, across the pond, there seems to be no shortage of people prepared to give them airtime.

          Anyone who uses three of their names in public deserves constant mocking. Which is probably why he snowflaked over to you. Have fun with him!

          • Clyde Barrow

            Gee, thanks! **shakes fist**

          • Grumpy Twat

            You’re welcome. You can keep him. Please.

      • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

        British accent makes you sound smrt to dumb conservative Muricans. They need all of the help sounding smrt they can find.

        • Persistent Demme

          Ding, ding, ding!

      • ez

        Ms May is eligible for a nice swatting IMHO

    • Pretty sure UK has stricter libulz laws so they come here instead

    • Grumpy Twat

      Because no one over here would give them the time of day.

  • MynameisBlarney
  • Look Closer

    OT, but funny as hell…

    β€œA special shout out to Scott Baio. I already went on Twitter about you,” Mr. Moran wrote. β€œI hope it finds you. You and my lil sis had a very very brief fling. She dumped you. 2 reasons. 1. She told me that you were more like a lil girl and not a man. 2. She told me that you were tiny. Ya know. Barely a man in the man region. True story! Scott, I’d advise you to get on your knees and pray you never run into me.”

    http://www.rawstory.com/2017/04/erin-morans-family-unleashes-holy-hell-on-fcking-coward-scott-baio/

    • Well, the word Chachi is a diminutive …

    • o.O

    • Persistent Demme

      That is one, really pissed off dude.

    • Marsupial99

      I told you… Joanie is gone, now no one loves Chachi.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “As an audiovisual professional, I would never make a blowjob joke about a microphone, that’s dangerous, there’s electricity in those things. Now, Ivanka absentmindedly putting the end of a white board marker in her mouth, or you know, snacking on a banana or a Popsicle, you know really slowly, savoring it, that would….I’ll be in my bunk.”
    — Jesse Watters

  • Me not sure

    I really like the way Jesse clutched his tiny pen in that picture.

    • Clyde Barrow

      Does Bob Dole know Jesse stole his clutching pen?

      • Yr. Gma

        Well, he clutched that pen because his hand was disabled, so maybe?

      • Me not sure

        Does Bob Dole know what he had for breakfast?

  • timpundit

    OT…Montana House race….

    http://freebeacon.com/politics/montana-democrat-rob-quist-regular-performer-nudist-resort/

    This conservative piece of shit just published this axe job on Quist.

    • jesterpunk

      Is he mad he isnt allowed at the nudist resort?

      • timpundit

        Was probably picked last for debate teams.

      • Marsupial99

        Probably the type that shows up there alone, with a camera.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      I suppose that we’re to derive that Quist is some sort of dangerous nudist radical who might start singing Cat Stevens au naturale at any moment.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        He’s not a bad looking guy. I could handle him singing Cat Stevens au naturale a lot more than I could handle Cat Stevens singing Cat Stevens au naturale. But I get your point.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      I noticed the line “Many pages . . . contain inappropriate images.” I have never really understood why photos of naked human beings engaged in ordinary human activities such as walking, drinking, eating, going to a concert, etc., are considered “inappropriate” unless they are actually engaging in some kind of behavior that other people might not want to watch, such as sex, or defecation. Well, now, wait. . . naked people engaging in sex, don’t we call that Porn, and isn’t it hugely popular? Is that different because the naked people in Porn are being paid to walk around naked and interact with each other? But then it’s OK to show naked tribal people in the Amazon jungle because they are not being paid? The philosophical and legal conflicts here are endless and very blurry.

      My only question is why would anyone in Idaho want to be a nudist? Idaho is too cold for nudism, in my humble opinion. Being a nudist on the Costa del Sol, now that I can understand.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “Maybe we should just let the pretty blonde ladies do everything for a while.”
    — FoxNews

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Sort of OT:https://mediamatters.org/blog/2017/04/26/pro-trump-rsbn-scales-back-cancels-mike-cernovich-program/216178

    “Pro-Trump RSBN Scales Back, Cancels Mike Cernovich Program”

    • Ezio

      Cernovich cries about censorship in 3, 2, 1…

      • Grokenstein

        He must have paused for breath.

  • Jenny

    Daddy is the only one who gets to sexually harass Vanky!

  • OT Our Impy has had her first crap since coming home!!

    I know that sounds silly but is shows her increasing independence and I was starting to worry, colon problems can kill cats

    • Anna Elizabeth

      That’s good news! :)

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Being the parent of an elderly senile cat with lifelong digestive problems who has now become a picky eater after a lifetime of adoring anything in a can, I can sympathize.
      I wish your cat many, many more normal poops.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      Colon problems can kill people too. I am sorry to hear about Impy’s problem, and I’m delighted she has made poo.

  • Me The People

    Nazi fluffer snowflake Anne Coulter runs away to safe space, now knows how Joan of Arc felt. Wingnuts making up stories about University refusing to protect Coulter and pals from impending liberal bloodbath.

    http://www.reuters.com/article/us-california-coulter-idUSKBN17S2D8

    • Bitter Scribe

      I wonder if, say, Liberty or Bob Jones universities have “liberal clubs” that keep inviting…

      Sorry, I can’t follow through on the analogy. I can’t think of a “speaker” on the left who would be as patently offensive as Spencer, Coulter or Yabbadabbadopoulos on the right.

      • You forget: If it is liberal and breathing, let alone actually speaking, it is offensive to the right.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        There are no “liberal clubs” at Liberty or Bob Jones universities. Those places consider you to be a liberal if you think Catholics are Christians.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      Well, you know, if people are going to repeatedly stand up in public and repeat hateful lies about people, they sort of have to expect some opposition, so yes, she’s a snowflake, as are all those Republican congress critters who are running away from Town Halls. Has anyone suggested yet that George Soros has paid the University to refuse to protect her? I keep waiting for that.

  • MynameisBlarney
  • Bitter Scribe

    I was wondering how long this asswipe would keep his job after O’Reilly was dumped. He sure doesn’t look like he’s helping himself.

  • Marceline

    These idiots are utterly incapable of acting like grownups.

  • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

    Sorry, crude comment like this about a woman not funny, regardless of her political persuasion. And yes, Catty comments about her clothing line aren’t in the same league.

    • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

      Although, to be fair, he looked pretty familiar with handling the “microphone” himself.
      Edit: I do apologize though it was not meant to be a homophobic comment. I meant it as a dick joke.

      • It is fair, since he is obviously his own best date.

      • Thorn Spike

        Well, he IS a dick.

      • Sister the Resister

        And that is exactly how I took it.

        • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

          : ) thanks!

  • boredcatlady

    Oh my god I hate that prison planet guy. Fuuuuuuuucking hate him.

  • boredcatlady

    Quick question: is “pussburglar” part of the vernacular now or should I credit Evan every time I use it? Which is all the times.

    • Beanz&Berryz

      I think Wonkette citation rules require only occasional acknowledgement of source, and particularly to avoid undue credit to One’s self.

    • rebecca

      I MADE PUSSBURGLAR FIRST. CREDIT ME AND ME ONLY.

      • boredcatlady

        Oh my god I AM SO EMBARRASSED!!!! Ok, so I think Evan’s was the “…of the Mar-a-Lago Pussgrabs.”? I could probably google it. I love them both, but pussburglar just has such a good mouthfeel. πŸ˜ƒ

  • Lefty Frizzell

    To be fair it’s not nearly as bad as Bolling’s “boobs on the ground” quip of yesteryear. That was insanely insulting and it’s a disgrace and a crime against humanity that he still has a fucking job.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      I disagree. This is much worse.

    • Hardly Ideal

      *Google*
      …
      Dude, he said that during a talk about the UAE’s first female fighter pilot? And people wonder why the Right is believed to have a problem with women.

      Also, where’s Kim Campbell when you need her? Not to do anything violent, of course. Just to… I dunno, loose a burst of training blanks over his house?

  • Panika MCD

    can we censure these people FOREVER? this has to violate some FCC regulation.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      There is no such thing as “regulations” anymore.

      • Panika MCD

        but what about all those mean people who violated Sad Milo’s FREEDOM SPEECHES at Berkeley by shouting him down?

        • Angela Ruzzo

          He had a microphone. If he can’t shout louder than a bunch of wimpy, stoned college kids, then he should lose his Lunatic Fringe Alt-Right Membership Card.

          • Panika MCD

            you know ALEC is shopping a model bill on this in the states right now, right?

  • Mehmeisterjr

    This raises (not begs) the question: What are these clowns The Five of?

    The end of civilization as we know it?

    • well you know Rosy and her 5 sisters, right?
      Pretty sure it is that.

    • Odd JΓΈrgensen

      The 5 couchpotatoes of the apocalypse.

  • efoveks

    “So-called “feminists” are trying to block people voting for a woman.”

    Yes, because the only way for one woman to support another is to mindlessly vote for her, despite her morality or positions, because she is another woman. Also, all gay people are attracted to all members of their same sex because gay, obviously…

    • Grokenstein

      Well, “mindless” is how FOXHenhouse morons do everything. If you use that brain-thingy in your headskull, you’re one of them there fuzzy-thinkin’ intellectual-type nerds what should be given a swirly.

    • JD Mulvey

      Closely related to being “intolerant” for exercising your right to not agree with fascists who would deny you your rights.

    • Sister the Resister

      Thanks for putting into words what I couldn’t get to, between my fuming rage and jaw dropping awe of how obtuse they are.

    • Alexander Stallwitz

      Thats what i was thinking, by that logic, women should have voted for Palin because she would have been the first vice president . And of course Hilliary Clinton should have carried the Womens vote because she would be the first woman president. God, what a fucking idiot.

  • TimJ

    I thought maybe maybe there was some question about this jerkwads intentions in saying what he said. My wife watched it, she said blow job. My 20 year old daughter watched it, she said blow job. My 15 year old daughter watched it, she said dick sucking. So its unanimous.

  • darnyoudarnyoutoheck

    Filter free double douche canoes and the words they say. No way to explain that.

  • Angela Ruzzo

    I think it is pretty safe now to assume that Watters watches a lot of porn.

    • Contemplative Ron

      I don’t want to know what kind.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        Probably involves Nazi furries

        • Miles Monroe

          … who think the Earth is flat.

  • Angela Ruzzo

    What would Walter Cronkite say about this?

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      It’s hard to speak when you are vomiting.

  • anon_the_great

    I bet Watters squeals like a pig when…

  • Hardly Ideal

    “Smooth jazz DJ voice?”

    Dude, you’re digging yourself deeper. Just apologize and move on. And maybe stick to puns.

    And give us a real apology, none of this “I’m sorry if you were offended” bullshit. Offense was had, so there’s no “if” here.

  • Apple Scruff

    I want to be outraged on behalf of Ivanka and women everywhere, but I can muster about as much sympathy as I did when Tomi Lahren was fired from The Blaze.

  • Would anybody be surprised if this iZod-staining homunculus was cornering women in the elevators of FNC? Was jacking off in some intern’s coffee? And who among us would be shocked if we found out this twerp had a little bit of BillO in him (yes, fiduciary culpability, but I am sooooo referring to the semen in Jesse’s anal canal)?

  • UnsaltedSinner

    And so the “Days without doing something offensive to women” sign at Fox is flipped back to 0…

    • natoslug

      s’okay — it’s been so long since they’ve had any other digits up there, they’ve forgotten where they’re stored.

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      When did it ever get turned to one?

  • Manhattan123

    Fox: like your drunk 83-year-old uncle at Thanksgiving talking about “those people” we’ll never change.

    • Frank Lee

      Talking about “those people” complaining about PC and then trying to grab his 14 year old niece’s ass.

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    Her father has said far worse, but okay.

  • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

    Here’s how it goes: If Le Pen were the socialist in this race any woman supporting her would be doing so just because she is a woman. Now, as Le Pen is the fascist, any woman NOT supporting her is a hypocrite. And in the first scenario any woman who was against the female socialist and for the male fascist would be “proof” that the female socialist is bad for women.
    Just like any black American who supported Obama did so only because he was also black and the few black Americans who opposed Obama were on Fox 24/fucking7!

  • Scooby

    What would he have said if she had accidentally sat on the microphone?

  • Jeff Mc Donald

    He forgot about his virginity pledge. Still has the bracelet though.

  • Begin Anew Day

    Yo Rupert Fucking Murdoch! Obviously this guy has WHAT IT TAKES to work at Fox News in a prime time way.

    So when does he get a key to the executive washroom? Don’t forget to buy him some knee pads. It’s not right to skimp on the safety equipment he is going to need to keep his job. (You might want to consider buying him some safety goggles as well.)

  • Seriously?

    If they don’t dine with evils doin’ womens or go to events where intoxicating liquors are served, how do they know what “cuck” means?

  • Opalescent Riddles

    “Fox Idiot…”

    but I repeat myself.

  • Shawn Renee Ernoehazy

    I mostly noticed the breathy “phone sex” voice she used, which was creepy and not at all “empowered woman” sounding. I change my tone and speed for doing guided meditations, but her voice was not calm and soothing, it was “trying to be feminine and sexy.” It creeped me out, why would anyone do that on an international stage and think it was okay? Her grooming started early.

    • BigCSouthside

      Literally everything about her is a rehearsed image

  • rick

    Jesse announced tonight that he’s going on a “vacation.”

    #DrainTheCONservativeSwamp

  • Judithrmoore

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    • Odd JΓΈrgensen

      No, just…no. Who gets paid every 20 weeks?

  • lovelydestruction
  • lovelydestruction
  • SeeTrain65

    And with the class action suit just filed, things are really starting to get interesting.

    http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2017/04/26/inside-fox-news-s-explosive-racism-lawsuit.html

  • ryp

    Yeah, the left is all about tolerance and diversity, but then they don’t vote for fascists, racists and nazis, what hypocrites.

  • Harbinger08

    Ivanka has the smoothest tonsils.

  • BreakingDeadMen

    She is horrible. Also, Melanika is 47 today? She’s either lying or she has aged horribly.

  • rubikcube

    I like especially how Jesse works the shaft.

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