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Louisiana Rep. Frank Hoffman (R-Ouachita, Gezundheit) is SO MAD at science you guys! He sponsored bills for Louisiana Society of Anesthesiologists Day on April 11, and YMCA Day on the 12. But he’ll have no truck with So Called Science Day, Goshdarnit! All he asked from Science was to help him pass his Uh Huh Abortion Is TOO Reversible Act. Just last year he said, “Go forth and find me some proof that medication abortions can be reversed when Jesus comes into the heart of a fallen woman and shows her that a baby is God’s righteous punishment for her sins.” (More or less.)

WHEREAS, news reports published in February of 2015 indicated that Dr. George Delgado, medical director at Culture of Life Family Health Care in San Diego, California, had developed and successfully implemented a method of reversing what was thought to be the inevitably fatal effect of the RU-486 abortion pill; […]

THEREFORE, BE IT RESOLVED that the Legislature of Louisiana does hereby urge and request the Department of Health and Hospitals to study whether the effects of an abortion induced with drugs or chemicals can be reversed.

BE IT FURTHER RESOLVED that the Department of Health and Hospitals shall convene a panel of experts in obstetrics and gynecology and pharmacology to provide guidance on this matter and aid them in their study […]

Representative Hoffman is obviously not a regular reader of your Wonkette, or the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology. Only last month we shouted the word VAGINA!!! at an Indiana legislator and explained to him that Dr. Delgado injecting six women with a massive dose of progesterone was NOT SCIENCE.

Because medication abortion requires this combination of medications, many women will not abort just from using the first medication. In 30-50% of women who take mifepristone alone, the pregnancy will continue

Progesterone, while generally well tolerated, can cause significant cardiovascular, nervous system and endocrine adverse reactions as well as other side effects.

Remember this handsome devil? That’s Indiana state Rep. Ron Bacon, who also likes Abortion Reversal fairy tales.

Representative Hoffman was probably too busy running the First Baptist Church’s Cable Access Network to read our Mommyblog. But he did take time out of his Godbothering to bother the Louisiana Department of Health. And wouldn’t you know it, they put a couple of lady scientists on the case! As if people who suffer The Curse of Eve know about babies!

The panel of experts convened by LDH to review this procedure unanimously concluded, based on their professional experience in the areas of obstetrics/gynecology, pharmacology, and nursing and the above-referenced research, that there was insufficient evidence to conclude that the administration of progesterone in an attempt to reverse a medication abortion is scientifically sound. In reaching this conclusion, the panel expressed great concerns about the experimental nature of using progesterone treatment after taking mifepristone, as highlighted in the Delgado study, and the failure of the study to meet the established standards of safety, efficacy, and ethics.

Well, that just makes Frank Hoffman sad. Utah and South Dakota were able to see past the propaganda put out by the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology to pass this law. He wishes you ladies could overcome your emotions and examine the scholarly publications of LifeSite News.

Hoffmann told Rewire that he was “disappointed” by the health department’s report, and said he had hoped the department would do a more exhaustive review of the medical evidence. Hoffmann said that the report would not deter him and other lawmakers from bringing the issue before the legislature.

Representative Frank Hoffman forgives you, Daphne Robinson, JD, MPH and Amy Zapata, MPH, for you know not what you do. But don’t fret, because he’s willing to turn the other cheek and sponsor a law that entitles hussies to get a massive shot of hormones that have no impact on the viability of a pregnancy. Like a shepherd who watches over his sheep. Amen.

[ Louisiana HCR87 / Legislative Report on HCR87 / Rewire ]

Please donate a dollar for our abortion reversal fund. Just kidding! Or are we?????

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  • BloviateMe
    • proudgrampa

      I regret that someone reversed this guy’s abortion.

      • MynameisBlarney

        I bet his mawma does too.

    • MynameisBlarney

      I think I would goozle punch that stupid fucker (with votes) if I ever saw him holding up that stupid fucking sign.

      • Or out him as a trans to his “friends.”

    • Msgr_MΩment

      I
      Regret
      My [never having had the opportunity to give Mitch McConnell’s mom an]
      Abortion

  • Mavenmaven

    “More exhaustive review” in GOP science means ‘make up some findings that agree with me’.

    • Antonin Dvorak

      “Conform to my world view, damnit!”

  • Longstreet63

    Lady parts! How do they work?

    • Nounverb911

      Well, those guys will never find out.

    • MynameisBlarney

      They’ll never know.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Dick goes in, babby comes out. You can’t explain that!

  • memzilla Ω

    Forcing women to have children is simply a way to control them. Keep them poor, and busy raising a child, and too fearful of losing a shitty jerb to demand higher wages, and/or too fearful of losing an abusive spouse and his income to ever stand up to him. I do not understand why people don’t get this and see how they are being grotesquely manipulated..

  • FlemmishSpy

    Have you considered the regret of not aborting?
    https://img.wonkette.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/03/Bacon.jpg

    • memzilla Ω

      A strong case for birth reversal.

    • proudgrampa

      Well, there’s always retroactive abortion (with votes, of course).

    • Lance Thrustwell

      I’m probably wrong, but I can’t shake the feeling that no right-thinking person could ever possibly look like that.

    • BloviateMe

      That dude looks like every high school’s wood shop teacher.

      • MynameisBlarney

        Or like that used car salesman that invites you to come to his church.
        I have had that happen before.

        I was my usual diplomatic self.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          XD I can imagine….

          • MynameisBlarney

            LOL
            It’s that fine-tuned diplomacy that makes me not want to go to family gatherings anymore.

            I have a bunch of relatives that are slack-jawed redneck bible thumpin’ morans.

            And I just can’t NOT call them out on their bullshit anymore.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I hear that. ~hugs~ and there is no reason you should have to just take crap without giving some back.

          • My go to anymore is “Good on you for ignoring all actual evidence and sticking to what you wish you believed but obviously do not since you freak out every time you are challenged!”

          • MynameisBlarney

            That’s a lot more civilized than my go to, lol.

        • Bebecca

          I find “I’m an atheist” sends people fleeing. Probably to most people an atheist is one step, probably a tiny little one, above serial killer.

          • MynameisBlarney

            I told a guy that and he asked me why I worshiped Satan.
            I asked him if he knew what the fuck atheism really is.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        IOW, he’s got a bottle in the top drawer of his desk?

        • MynameisBlarney

          And is missing 2 fingers from his right hand.

      • Phoenixdoglover

        Gotta see the hands. How many fingers?

        • theCryptofishist

          8.5

    • Wild Cat

      Can he abort his nasal hair?

  • Painter of Goats

    The one upside to having ignorant nimrods like this proposing pointless legislation is that my eye-rolling muscles have become totally buff.

  • nightmoth

    A Baby.– God’s righteous punishment for her sins? Or a life form more sacred than all others because it looks like God? Make up your damn minds, forced birthers.

    • proudgrampa

      I just don’t think anyone really understands this God fella.

      • Nockular cavity

        He’s big on the passive-aggressive stuff, and sometimes just the aggressive stuff.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      As a former parent of a two-year old (I got better), I can honestly say:
      WHY NOT BOTH?

      • nightmoth

        lol!

    • SweetDeeKat

      If my children looked like God at birth, then God looks mighty like a bald woodchuck.

  • Nounverb911

    Another confederate monument that needs to be torn down.

  • Stulexington

    Hoffmann had hoped the panel would do a more exhaustive review of the medical evidence. The panel responded they would be happy to do an exhaustive review of medical evidence as soon as he provided some.

    • I’m also assuming they’re asking to see his bill paying for this procedure.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    If abortions can be reversed, why do these Morans fight so hard to ban abortions?

    I mean: no harm, no foul, right?

    • Lance Thrustwell

      I don’t know if abortions can be reversed, but when I see that picture, I know digestion can be reversed. Forcefully.

  • I’d like to see the study, but it sounds like Delgado went ahead and tried this without going through such little requirements as going through an institutional review board, and informed consent. The sort of thing that gets papers bounced from most journals.

    • zerosumgame0005

      he should also review his insurance, I doubt it protects him with that kind of shit

      • Celtic_Gnome

        Yeah, but he got a great deal on it from Panda.

    • Nockular cavity

      Also tends to get medical licenses bounced.

  • goonemeritus

    He need s to leave this kind of thing up to Jesus, we scientists are to busy developing sex toys.

    • zerosumgame0005

      Go Go Gadget Dildo!

      • H0mer0

        is that to the same tune as the Power Ranger’s song?

  • Ezio
    • Bebecca

      and it’s becoming only about fetus protection. If the republicans really cared about the preborn, they wouldn’t be all about slashing prenatal care. Further proof their sincerity is all bullshit-as if we didn’t know.

    • (((fka_donnie_d)))

      For the love of motherfucking fuck, could somebody please uncensor this shit?

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    Sorry, this was all too complicated for my lady brain. Where do we get to the part where the storks bring Babby to the mamma stomach? ‘Cause you think you could just ask the stork to bring it back if you change your mind.

  • Lefty Frizzell

    They’re proposing some sort of quack science from a quack doctor with a brazenly politico-religious agenda, straight out of some sort of Ken Russel comic horror parody.

    It amounts to torture, and cannot in any case rise above the level of reckless medical experimentation on unwilling subjects, without regard to any reasonable or accepted standards of ethics or safety.

    It’s all in some desperate attempt to control sex and reproduction without having to dirty themselves with actually learning anything about it.

    These guys are just plain creeping me out.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      Say, you know who else engaged in reckless medical experimentation on unwilling subjects without regard to any reasonable or accepted standards of ethics or safety?

      Come on, folks. This one’s a gimmee.

  • Randy Riddle

    “But he did take time out of his Godbothering…”

    I think you meant “godblathering”.

    • Contemplative Ron

      No, it’s God bothering.
      – God

      • “These fucking people. I even sent my kid to them to lay out the rules pretty fucking specifically and they still fuck it up. Screw em and pass the mimosas.”
        -God, probably

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    “Your research doesn’t support my theory. I demand facts to fit my theory! So make it happen or else your funding gets cut!”

  • Msgr_MΩment

    The American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology: great party school or the greatest party school?

    Discuss.

    • Spurning Beer

      The fighting Speculums!

      • Contemplative Ron

        It’s less uncomfortable if you don’t fight it.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        They had a tough game last week against the International University of Delaware.

  • Thaumaturgist

    One more controversy to teach.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Teaching relativity lately, so I’ma go with this one…
      http://www.meta-synthesis.com/webbook/35_pt/classical_periodic.jpg

      • theCryptofishist

        General or special?

        • FlemmishSpy

          It’s all relative.

          • Contemplative Ron

            That’s what my aunt used to tell me.

        • Msgr_MΩment

          Special, except for obligatory comments about riding an elevator or fuzzy dice leaning into a turn.

      • Ghenghis McCann

        Isn’t Aether what those new-fangled radio waves are supposed to flow through? Never seen one of them so Aether can’t exist.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          “We’re On the Air!”

      • PubOption

        On an aether binge?

        • Celtic_Gnome

          We were just outside Barstow when the drugs kicked in.

      • E.A. Blair

        Current day NeoPagans use Air, Fire, Earth, Water and Spirit.

        • Msgr_MΩment

          Old Janx Spirit?

  • Spurning Beer

    There are thousands of anti-abortion drugs they could experiment with using, if it weren’t for the phony baloney bullshit about the “life of the mother.” Pfft.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Does Flint tapwater work?

      • Spurning Beer

        I have not seen one bit of evidence that it doesn’t.

  • Wild Cat

    Oh, if only I had a time machine and could go back sixty years and insert an olive pit in their mothers’ vaginas to keep them from farting out these pale old buggers, humanity might have a chance . . .

    • GoutMachine

      Did they not have aspirin back then?

      • Wild Cat

        They did, but she freebased it. Ain’t no holdin’ the Born-Again ladies’ legs together.

  • janecita

    Pretty soon, we are going to be needing “Women on Waves” services. Damn Republicans and their obsession with women’s bodies!

    http://www.dw.com/en/dutch-boat-women-on-waves-in-mexico-to-offer-women-legal-terminations/a-38548900

    • Lance Thrustwell

      I’m obsessed with women’s bodies, but in a much nicer way, I hope.

  • schmannity

    Don’t leave climate science to climate scientists and don’t leave obstetrics to obstetricians! These are the realms of flattopped goobers in Indiana and Louisiana.

  • schmannity

    Republicans’ war on women is just a subset of their War on Intelligence.

  • snark-lurker

    r.e. the above pic of Ron Bakon–he looks like he just found a “High” setting for his butt plug and it…is…ON BABY!

  • theCryptofishist

    I’m waiting for the medical intervention that will wizz all the jizz they ever jizzed back up their urethra and into their balls in a votey low number of seconds.

  • Anna Elizabeth

    What the actual fuck?

    • GoutMachine

      Actual fucking = something this asshat is not too familiar with.

    • snark-lurker

      nice to see you got your ‘tude back! wonk-on

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Thanx Doll. I’m in the fight. How are you today?

        • snark-lurker

          i myself am just coming out of a blue funk that stunk, now we be back, baby…no fear, we’re all in this together & I’m pullin’ for yuh

          • Anna Elizabeth

            ~hugs~ That means more than you know. :)

  • MynameisBlarney

    WAY OT, but just talked to one of my engine guys in Ft Lauderdale about getting a Mitsubishi industrial engine to marinize for one of our customers.
    And his Mitsubishi guy is in Venezuela right now, and the govt seized the boatyard where the yacht he was working on was at.
    When he tried to go back to get his tools, the guards wouldn’t let him, or anyone else in.
    As he tried to explain his way in, the guard was like, “Oh yeah, we forgot to seize that yacht too!”

    • PubOption

      Mitsubishi engines worry me. I remember the self-destructing piston rings from the 1980’s.

      • MynameisBlarney

        They make very fine marine diesel engines.
        Little 4 cylinder 50hp engines that last forever, provided they’re not owned by an idiot that only raises the engine hatch when they don’t start.

        Snorkel/Scuba boat captains keep up in business.
        Especially the ones that weren’t previously in the Navy or Coast Guard.

  • Proud Liberal

    Looks like the white guys are winning………

    • Anna Elizabeth

      It’s not over yet. This might be Democracy’s Stalingrad. We have to Remember to hold on. Not One Step Back.

      • Proud Liberal

        I’m not going anywhere. Give me liberty or give me death!

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Yes!

        • Ghenghis McCann

          In Trump’s America the choices are poverty or death.

          • Proud Liberal

            He will do whatever it takes to enrich himself. The American people be damned.

          • snark-lurker

            do you mean “poverty till death do we part” ?

          • PubOption

            “Give me poverty or give me death” is not an inspiring slogan.

        • Contemplative Ron

          ‘Give me liberty or give them death!’ seems a more attractive set of alternatives.

          • John Adams Founding Father agrees with you.
            ‘The right of a nation to kill a tyrant, in cases of necessity, can no more be doubted, than to hang a robber, or kill a flea. But killing one tyrant only makes way for worse, unless the people have sense, spirit and honesty enough to establish and support a constitution guarded at all points against the tyranny of the one, the few, and the many.’
            JOHN ADAMS, A Defence of the Constitutions of Government

          • yadig
      • Thiazin Red

        If this is Stalingrad where is our Lydia Litvyak?

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Maybe we just haven’t noticed her, or our Vassily Zaitsev, just yet.

        • The Wanderer

          She’s getting more ink done.
          Oh, she’s not ‘Lydia the Tattooed Lady?’
          Never mind.

  • Chadwells

    God is pretty much the worst thing to have ever happened to the people of earth. It emboldens stupidity.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      Why did some people get over it and others hang on to it like their safety blanket?

      • Chadwells

        Darwin.

        • Ghenghis McCann

          That would explain why they’re confined to certain isolated habitats.

      • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

        Religion in most cases is a psychic crutch for weak-minded people who are unable to face the fact of their own insignificance and mortality. I’ve always found it very interesting that those who are the most insistent on keeping their loved ones “alive” by heroic measures when it is clear that they have no quality of life whatsoever, (remember Terry Schiavo?) and that continued intervention is nothing but a form of torture, are almost invariably religious. Why would you want to prolong someone’s agony when it is keeping them from going to their reward, and Jesus’ loving embrace? Methinks that, deep down, they lack the courage of their supposed convictions.

        • We have a scientific definition of religion. It is not your definition.

  • Anna Elizabeth

    That grinning flattop looks like what is left when most of the jizz makes a creamy stain on the mattress. Fuckin’ A.

  • rosenbomb

    I’m probably the only one who watches Degrassi here, but there was a great abortion story in the most recent season. A 16 yo got pregnant and decided to have an abortion. She was a little sad and stressed, but afterwards she felt better. She said she felt relieved!

    The plot line was great because of its simplicity: she didn’t want to have a baby, so she didn’t. That is the reality for so many women, and these asshats need to stop acting like women can’t make up their own damn minds about abortion.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      It’s part of their twisted, warped, totalitarian, barbaric “faith” that women have no agency, they’re not really fully realized humans, and it’s why I get shouty, slappy, stabby, and shooty around them.

    • Thiazin Red

      I watched Degrassi! Drake will always be Jimmy Brooks to me.

      There was another good abortion story years ago too. One of the girls, Manny, got pregnant after she and her boyfriend Craig have sex, and she wants to keep it at first. But she realizes that she isn’t ready after spending some time with her best friend Emma’s baby sibling. I appreciated too that Emma stood up for Manny, even though Emma was generally anti-abortion, when Craig started yelling at her about it.

      Friday Night Lights handled abortion pretty well too.

      • rues

        And, because I’m terribly old, I’m going to have to point out that they did an abortion story line in the original series as well. One night stand ended up with one of a pair of identical twins pregnant and, though she was anti-abortion personally, the other twin went with her to the clinic.

        Of course, the rest of the drama ensued because another girl found out about it and started painting slurs all over the locker of the girl who’d had an abortion. All of this culminated in Spike (yes, Emma’s mom) telling the chickie with the spray paint that just because she’d had *her* baby (Emma) didn’t mean that was right for everyone…::themesong::

        • Teecha

          I remember that one from the olden days too.

  • Saxo the Grammarian

    Waitaminute, didn’t they used to use progesterone to induce labor?

    • Undocumented Skwerl!

      That is the mystery of their faith.

    • Julaine

      No, they use a different hormone that also begins with the same prefix: prostaglandin.

  • I honestly do not understand what they think they will win by pushing the narrative that abortions are reversible.
    Would not even more women try thinking they have a fail safe? Resulting in even more abortions?

    • Bebecca

      How stupid is the woman who believes that?

  • Villago Delenda Est

    There seem to be a lot of men in this country who think they know all about female biology when in fact they haven’t the slightest motherfucking clue, and, amazingly, they all seem to be “Christian” fundigelical types. Isn’t that amazing?

    • Contemplative Ron

      What a coincidence!

    • E.A. Blair

      It seems that despite hating sex, all Christians seem to do is obsess about it.

  • jodyleek

    Or better still, why not force all women of childbearing age to take monthly pregnancy tests and then, if found to be pregnant, lock them all up in a prison until they give birth, so there can be no abortions what so ever. I’d be honestly amazed if this has never been proposed by these neanderthals.

  • Villago Delenda Est

    It’s twits like this guy who make the “persecution of ‘Christians'” so appealing.

    • He’s not a Christian.
      And in before someone starts sniffing that good Christians don’t say that other people are not Christian, Imma just mention I asked Jesus’ forgiveness so it is all good.

      • ltmcdies

        as I recall Jesus shit kicked a few rubes in his time

  • Raan

    I have the feeling I’m going to get a lot of mileage out of this reaction image.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/9bbb2dd0e200574b0792d8e550f711118910483e783f1912044b2816227f4840.jpg

  • OddMan

    Even in the dystopian The Handmaid’s Tale the men were not this goddamned dumb.

    • C4TWOMAN

      Its the perennial case of truth is stranger that fiction. Atwood was very good about the point she was making, but terrible about other things, like the economic system that was supposed to function–which, to be blunt, would not. But even points where she was solid, she had no idea that the loons were loonier than she imagined.

      If someone wrote a book about this entire political dumpster fire we’re living through, if would be considered wild satire/parody and no one would believe it could happen.

      • theblackdog

        I saw Lewis Black about a month ago and he basically joked that dystopian writers had it all wrong because the 2016 election proved they had no imagination to realize just how loony and dumb people could be.

        • C4TWOMAN

          Exactly, lol.

      • OddMan

        I don’t believe it is happening, and it is real.
        “YOU MANIACS!“
        “You blew it up!”
        “Ah, damn you! Goddamn you all to hell!”

      • Vonnegut already wrote that book.They label it science fiction.

  • ltmcdies

    so when this guy was in high school those “health” classes weren’t mandatory….and he’s learned nothing since then?

    • Me not sure

      “What is this high school heatlh class of which you speak?”

      • Yr. Gma

        “What is this school of which you speak?”

        • Me not sure

          Whuh…?

  • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

    Fucking ignorant hicks. They’re wearing suits but that doesn’t hide the fact that these inbred sister-fucking rednecks are as unwashed as the day they came out of the barn infested with fleas and lice and covered in cow dung to join their respective states’ legislatures.

    • Little Doll–MOAMF

      Even though I am slightly inbred myself, born in a red state. I must concur. They’re hicks and religious nuts, and just plain ignorant. And even if they know better they will pull this shit in order to further their agenda, and, as they think, please gawd.

  • Me not sure
  • Royal Ugly Dude

    Fuck this guy with a recycled confederate monument.

    • H0mer0

      it reminds me that at the beginning of every horror movie, there’s a rational African American being ignored who ends up taking the fall.

  • Laura911

    Hoffman himself is the product of a reversed abortion.

  • mardam422

    These people would bring back leeches if they thought it might stop an abortion.

    • darnyoudarnyoutoheck

      Leech libel!!1!! Leeches have a nice little niche in modern medicine, keeping blood flowing in reattached fingers, toes and other bits of the careless or unlucky.

      • Brexit Saboteur

        Beat me to it. Maggots do too, they’re used to clean up necrotised flesh when more conventional methods have failed or aren’t practical.

  • C4TWOMAN

    “Jesus comes into the heart of a fallen woman and shows her that a baby is God’s righteous punishment for her sins.”

    But that only makes sense if forcing her to have the kid will doom both her AND the kid to poverty, shame and squalor.

    So he’s saying Jesus wants to punish kids for being born “out of wedlock”?

    ????

  • JParkerSD46

    What the fuck is WRONG with these ignorant dipshits!?!?!?!??11!?? Are they really that insanely stupid that they believe this much crazy? I’m serious. What the fuck is wrong with them? Too much southern heat and humidity? Too many mint juleps? Too much in-breeding? And I’m not sure that Hoffman really meant to sponsor Anesthesiologist Day. Aren’t those people well-known supporters of “science”?

    • Yellerduck

      You can’t spell Anesthesiologist without A-T-H-E-I-S-T. A true Christian would just pray the pain away.

  • The Wanderer

    What the unholy happy monkey fuck.

    • Alan

      That’s about my reaction.

  • azeyote

    seeing how it’s men again who are discussing what women can or should do, i think they should talk of the reversible possibilities of using condoms – i think they should rant and demand men to freeze those used condoms in case they made a mistake by using one – and let women do their own thinking –

    • VirginiaLady

      Waiting for de instructions for de-frosting those lil beauties in de microwave.

    • Dudleydidwrong

      Hoffman thinks that “reversible possibilities of using condoms” means to turn it inside out so that you can get two fucks from one condom. The man’s a genius.

  • JMP

    “a, had developed and successfully implemented a method of reversing what was thought to be the inevitably fatal effect of the RU-486 abortion pill”

    Fatal effect? Huh? There is no fatal effect of RU-486; what it does is in the name, “abortion pill”, it causes a miscarriage and ends an unwanted, and there is nothing fatal about that, at all, you lying idiots.

    • I can show that things like “breathing air,” “drinking water,” and “eating food” all have inevitably fatal effects. I blame it on being born.

  • CriticalDragon1177

    Frank Hoffman might as well be telling women to pray their abortions away!

  • SCK

    When are we going to be free of these fucking idiots?

    Oh, wait… when we are free Wonkette won’t be as funny anymore. Kinda of a harsh tradeoff.

    • theblackdog

      Then it might have to become a real Mommyblog

      • SCK

        THE HORROR! lol

        • theblackdog

          Even worse, it might allow….comments! *clutches pearls*

    • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

      They are still funny when they don’t have any political clout.

  • Lurkylu

    ladies should not be in charge of their own ‘giners. They need chaperones down there.

    • E.A. Blair

      I volunteer, and promise to make sure everything is in working order.

  • Brexit Saboteur

    Have I earned any non-open-thread-day-rant vouchers yet…?

  • VirginiaLady

    Real men aren’t afraid of women having free will.

  • Jonny On Maui

    Hoffmann said that the report would not deter him and other lawmakers from bringing the issue before the legislature.

    So facts that you don’t like don’t matter. Another grade A MORAN!

    • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

      Grade F Reb.

      • E.A. Blair

        Yet another sign that maybe we should have just let them secede – then we’d have a place to deport our morans.

        • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

          We could run an exchange program. 10 morans for every real human they don’t cotton to.

  • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

    “Didn’t do an exhaustive review” = “Didn’t agree with my preconceived idiotic ideological falsehoods”

  • major_asshole

    Here, ladies and gentlemen, is how my wonderful state’s Department of Health and Hospitals should have handled this “legislation:”

    Step 1: Accept Rep. Hoffman’s request and convene a panel of doctors, nurses, and pharmacologists at the expense of the legislators who identify as “pro-life.”

    Step 2: Lay out a requested budget for the conference. Such an event would require weeks-long stays at a hotel in New Orleans, dinners at fine restaurants, and of course the conference attendees’ hourly rates.

    Step 3: Convene the conference.

    Step 4: Five minutes later, break. For like two weeks.

    Step 5: Reconvene and issue the following statement: “Hoffman and those like him are total fucking morons.”

  • Zyxomma

    “Hoffmann said that the report would not deter him and other lawmakers from bringing the issue before the legislature.” That’s everything one needs to know right there.

  • Alan

    Sometimes I’m speechless. How did this guy survive to old age?

    • New Year 1080p

      Every time he dies a Scientician™ pumps his body full of progesterone and he just pops right back up!

  • norcalOG

    Maybe this reversal could also be accomplished by mixing and drinking both red and green Tabasco.

  • fawkedifiknow

    If you can believe in Immaculate Conception, you can god damn well believe in Miraculous Deconception!

    • efoveks

      More like Re-Animator! Bwahahahahahahaha!

  • Newzheimer

    I mean, just look at this face. Does not this face scream ‘science’ at you? If not science, what about ‘I went all the way through high school, so I know what I’m talking about, hurr,durr.’

    • Vel Venturi

      Well, to be fair, he does kinda resemble Beaker.

  • phoenix00

    With a photo like that I can SO TELL Ron Bacon seems SO NICE.

    • Stuart Hershon

      No makin’ bacon for that guy!

      • phoenix00

        Speaking of making bacon, do people that work in slaughterhouses even look this unhinged?

  • E.A. Blair
    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      I’d go even further and say “forced-birth.” It’s about punishing and controlling women, nothing else.

  • Bad Tom

    “the failure of the study to meet the established standards of safety, efficacy, and ethics.”

    The Doctor (if he is a doctor) who conducted this “research” should lose his medical license. Perhaps a Grand Jury should be convened.

    • Hollandaise

      I never understood why the anti-choice crowd would push this particular lie when it could be read as encouraging women to “try” abortions…but this explains a lot. Punish those awful sluts with something that doesn’t meet basic standards of safety. That’ll show ’em/

    • Chris

      A call to his local medical board might be more useful.

  • Truly Madly Derply

    If there were such a thing as abortion reversal, it would look like Ron Bacon.

  • svejk

    you know, i wasn’t depressed until i read your article. thanks, wonkers!

    • efoveks

      And to think it’s only Tuesday… ;)

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