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Billy we hardly liked ye

As almost all of you filthy liberals know by now, it’s official: Bill O’Reilly will no longer be the loudest, most obnoxious man on Fox News. It’s the end of an error, the demise of a two-decade career of assholery, and a dilemma for anyone trying to compile a list of Papa Bear Billo The Clown’s greatest hits. There’s simply too much awfulness to choose from! Happily, it’s also your Open Thread, so you filthy Wonkers can add your own cherished memories of the spite-filled jackhole as well. First off, the official announcement:

“After a thorough and careful review of the allegations, the company and Bill O’Reilly have agreed that Bill O’Reilly will not be returning to the Fox News Channel,” 21st Century Fox, the parent company of Fox News, said in a statement.

Tucker Carlson will take over O’Reilly’s 8 p.m. Eastern slot, and “The Five” will move from afternoons to 9 p.m. “The Five’s” afternoon slot will be filled by a solid hour of screaming at black people, we guess. And what’s next for O’Reilly himself? Newsmax TV, maybe? A radio gig? Just sitting at home in a chair that’s higher than all the others in his living room, looking at piles of money on his couches? Oh, hey, we’ve got it: We don’t give two shits as long as he’s gone.

But let’s not dwell on the future! Let’s celebrate the past, and all the fun times O’Reilly has brought us, starting with the obvious classic, his freakout over a malfunctioning teleprompter when he hosted the tabloid show Inside Edition. He doesn’t know what it is, he can’t read it:

Let us not forget the Dance Remix, either, one of O’Reilly’s greatest contributions to our culture:

This next one is a tad long, but also a classic: Pour a nice glass of something you like and watch Al Franken expose O’Reilly as a Lying Liar at the BookExpo America book show in 2003, after which O’Reilly gets petulant as Molly Ivins looks on in astonishment. Two parts, and well worth the time; if you’re in the mood for the full panel, part 1 of 6 is here.

Oh, the memories. You want more? Hey, if you’re fixing dinner, you may want to give a listen to Terry Gross’s 2003 Fresh Air interview with O’Reilly, which O’Reilly ended abruptly by stomping out of the studio because Terry Gross was incredibly unfair. It’s O’Reilly bombast at its best: He considered suing Franken for defamation, but decided not to, since O’Reilly’s book was such a huge hit that it was impossible to show Franken had damaged him. Good times! We like the part where O’Reilly is very sad about how people like Franken are cheapening American political discourse.

.

And who could forget the time Bill O’Reilly told atheist David Silverman that there has to be a God, because otherwise how can anyone explain the tides? (skip to 1:50 for the classic “tide goes in, tide goes out” exchange)

When some smartass astrophysicist explained there’s this thing called the moon, and it has gravity, O’Reilly declared victory: Sure, sure moon, whatever. But how’d the moon GET there? YOU PINHEADS!

Wonkette’s Jack Steuf transcribed O’Reilly’s reply:

How da Moon get dere?
How da Moon get dere?
How da Moon get dere?
How da Moon get dere?
How da Moon get dere?
How da Sun get dere?
How da Moon get dere?
How da Moon get dere?
How dit get dere?

See, now you believe in God. It was so desperate of you to think you were made of the things you see around you rather than fucking magic. Because fucking magic is the obvious cause of all things.

(As we all know, the Moon was put there by the NASA, who made a fake moon so we could land on it. It was all staged!)

O’Reilly, you magnificent bastard, we’ll never read ANY of your books!

So much more O’Reilly Stupid, so little time. Remember when he was the world’s greatest War Correspondent, covering the Falklands War and bravely doing it live from a hotel in Argentina? Anyone who says he didn’t put his life at risk doing a standup near a demonstration is a filthy liar!

Oh, and then there was Billo’s divorce and custody case, when we learned that O’Reilly allegedly beated up his wife, and his daughter was a filthy liar for saying she SAW him as he beated up his wife (loves his darling girl very much, though, the lying bitch), and even the court transcripts lied about how O’Reilly beated up his wife. For some reason, he didn’t win custody of his darling lying kids. But he did sue his ex for being a filthy cheating liar.

Also we’re pretty sure there was something about sexual harassment, though at the moment, with deadline coming up, it slips our mind. Maybe you can talk about that in the open thread, if you’re so inclined.

Yr Wonkette is supported by reader donations. Please hit the “Donate” linky to help us out! We may have a little more to say about Billo’s firing in the next couple days, possibly. What’s it worth to ya?

[NYT / The Hill]

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  • FlemmishSpy

    Now he can just loofa-round the pool.

  • Nounverb911
    • janecita

      You know, they have been saying the same misleading shit all day. He didn’t meet the Pope, he shook the Pope’s hand just like all the other people that got tickets did.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Was it Penn State Day?

  • Dutchman

    I just falafel about this whole situation.

    • FlemmishSpy

      I’m sure he’ll keep his sense of hummus.

    • notaten

      You’re a loofah if you can’t understand that the tides come in and the tides go out. NO OTHER EXPLANATION!!!!!!!

    • I love it, olive it.

    • FlemmishSpy

      He’ll have to pilaf a lot of bills from his roll of cash if he wants anyone to hang out with him.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        I don’t want to be a gyro.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Bill-O was going to mail his resignation to Rupert, but he muffaletta.

  • Nounverb911
    • Msgr_MΩment

      And giving Schadenfreude a healthy shot in the arm!

  • BadKitty904

    Who?

  • Nounverb911
    • SterWonk

      Wonkette’s non-existent-commentors LIBEL!!!

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Would anyone mind if I repeat my comment from this A.M.’s speculative thread?

    I’ve seen Angels fall from Blinding heights
    But you Yourself are nothing so Divine
    Just Next in Line

    Bye, Falafel

  • BearGHAZI

    Sweet Prince, we knew waaaaay to much about ye

  • A Bashful Nobody

    Schadenfreude is bad.
    Schadenfreude is bad.
    Hahahahahahahahaha!
    Schadenfreude is bad.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Sing to the tune of Joan Jett’s I hate myself for sniffing glue.
      Or was that Lloyd Bridges?

  • Nounverb911

    “Wonkette’s Jack Steuf transcribed O’Reilly’s reply:”
    Was that before or after he tried to kill the Wonkette?

    • Don’t blame Jack. He just said what we all were thinking.

  • JoeChristmas

    and can he take the millions of rubes that watch him with him?

  • Msgr_MΩment

    just posted this in a different thread, but it belongs here:

    “So you tell me he no longer has…..
    http://tribzap2it.files.wordpress.com/2014/01/david-caruso-sunglasses.jpg?w=540&h=351
    “…. a bullying pulpit?”

  • AndyC316

    “Fuck it, we’ll do it live!!!” is a gem tho

  • TJ Barke

    Now if only we could fit him with a shock collar that would go off every time he lies…

    • jesterpunk

      Who has to change the batteries every 2 minutes?

      • TJ Barke

        I’ll do it.

        • janecita

          You just wanna get close enough to smack him on the head every time you change the batteries!

          • TJ Barke

            Maybe…

    • Anna Elizabeth

      You’d have to power it off his hot air to provide enough juice.

      • TJ Barke

        Make it solar powered to really annoy him.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          XD

    • Doug Langley
  • Nounverb911
  • janecita

    Today O’Reilly, tomorrow Alex Jones!

  • IOnlyLikeCats

    My downstairs roommate and I took Princess and got some Unicorn frappuccinos (and the dog some whipped cream).

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Killing My Career a new book by Bill O’Reilly, available soon.

  • whitroth

    Bye, bye, Mr. Bill O, bye, bye.
    Drive you Chevy to the levy
    And go over the side….

  • JoeChristmas

    And the Puss Grab in Chief — and good friend and supporter of Bilbo — who paid ourt $25 mil for just ONE of his frauds gets to go on.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “Oh well, I’ll just have to settle for being a bitter, rich old white guy.”
    — Bill O’Reilly

  • Falafel will never taste the same.

  • nightmoth

    If only it had happened 12 or so years ago, we probably wouldn’t have so many RWNJs today. Of, course that’s discounting the influence of Rush Dildo, but Shouty Bill had a big part in dumbing down America.

    • TJ Barke

      The real blame is the repeal of the fairness doctrine by that motherfucker Ronnie Raygun

      • nightmoth

        Yep. That sucked and we’re still reaping the results.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        Mmm, although the fairness doctrine was jut for broadcasters, wasn’t it?
        (Spectrum License condition.) It never applied to cable did it? Although, as with mature content, cable followed broadcast norms pretty closely, so it definitely changed the norms.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Did you mean to misspell rape?

      • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

        Imagine!! Gore (maybe) would’ve been Prez, and we’d be a little less hatey and screwed over of a country if the Fairness Doctrine was still ’round…

    • janecita

      And Dr. Tiller would probably still be alive.

      • nightmoth

        !!!!!!!!!!! Yes.

      • tomamitai

        Fucking A! Because of his incitement of the murder of Dr. Tiller, Dildo deserves way worse than to be let out to pasture to enjoy his ill gotten gains. The rules of this forum prevent me from being more specific about what he does deserve.

  • Clearly fake news, as I’ve just checked out the past few hours of FOX News, and they haven’t reported on this story once.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      According to their Chyron, Bill O’Reilly is a Democrat anyway, so I don’t see what the big deal is.

      • JMP

        Bill O’Reilly (D-MSNBC)

        • FlownΩver

          NOOOOOOO!!!!!

  • So, Tucker Carlson is taking over the 8pm ET slot.

    FOX News became RT so slowly, no one even noticed. Putin must be very happy.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      That can’t last. Tucker is such a nonentity.

      • Manders

        Up next on Fox: BOW TIE with tucker carlson.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          I thought he was too cool for ties now? Wasn’t that part of his “new look” about two or three “new looks” ago?

          • Manders

            Well, just goes to show you how much I’ve been paying attention to TC.

            And I ain’t sorry, neither.

      • But his boring, unintelligent repeating of conservative talking points is so soothing to the 70 year old white men who make up the majority of FOX’s audience. Allows them to fall asleep and dream of a land as pure as vanilla.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Cheer up Bill, I hear RT is hiring.

  • jesterpunk
  • Nounverb911
    • TJ Barke

      If they were actually unfounded you’d still have your job.

    • janecita

      The morons, paid 13 million dollars to make these “unfounded” claims go away! Lol!!

    • FlemmishSpy

      Fuck it! I’ll do it alone!

    • puredog

      Pro tip: Only people with hearts can be “disheartened.”

    • JustDon’tSayFlatEarth

      Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa@@@@@@@@@!!!!!!
      Fuck right the fuck off, Bill.

  • Crystalclear12

    I didn’t miss!! I wasn’t even aiming for him!!

  • Carpe Vagenda

    oooh, Al Franken *and* Molly. I knew you really loved me.

    Also, I vote “It’s the end of an error” is the phrase most likely to appear in attempted gotchas in this week’s Shit for Brains.

  • Crystalclear12

    Wouldn’t you HATE being Fox HR right about now?

  • shoeflyin

    I will be celebrating the demise of this smarmy blowhard. I have hated him for years – mostly because my parents love him, and he turned them into hateful ignorant people that I can’t stand to be around
    Wonder how they are taking this…

    • TJ Barke

      I imagine they are lamenting the terrible FAKE NEWS by the “alt-left”.

  • Give O’Reily some credit: he lived by 50s values he championed, where you could do what you want with women, ignore the concerns of blacks, and beat up teh Ghayez in celebration of white poser.

    • FlownΩver

      Then why isn’t he preznit?

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Sometimes you’re the Louisville Slugger, sometimes you get whacked upside the head with a bagful of lead bricks.

  • Thaumaturgist

    Bannon. Steve Bannon is looking for another job. Where else do failed GOP politicians go?

    • ltmcdies

      White House Press Secretary when Spicey decides to resign to spend “more time with the family”

    • Jamoche

      Lecture circuit. But that’s not working out so well for Ann Coulter, she just got the boot from Berkeley: http://www.sfgate.com/bayarea/article/UC-Berkeley-orders-cancellation-of-Ann-Coulter-11084299.php

      • JMP

        Poor Ann Coulter, now that she’s gotten older after having traded on her looks and is mostly ignored she’s become a victim of the very cultural misogyny that she likes to claim doesn’t exist.

        • Edith Prickly

          Drinking the blood of virgins doesn’t work like it used to.

          • hendenburg2

            Someone better let Peter Thiel know.

            Serious talk though, guys: Let’s ease up on the whole Lady Bathory thing. After all, which was more likely: 1) that she actually drank the blood of virgins or 2) that her two male cousins made everything up so they could get her executed and inherit her estate?

          • darnyoudarnyoutoheck

            hey! she supposedly bathed in the blood of virgins. Totally different.

          • Edith Prickly

            I never thought it was a thing anyone did, but if anyone could, it would be the Coultergeist.

  • Crystalclear12

    Let the Shit far Brains auditions begin!

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Ahh, I await the wailing and gnashing of teeth by the Faithful Faux Noos Fuckers. The Tears of Stupid Hateful Wretches taste like Kir Royale to Miz Anna.

    • Marion in Savannah

      To me those tears taste like the first asparagus of spring out of my asparagus patch. But, of course, YMMV. (But they are YUMMMMY!!!)

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Oh, I’m jelly, I love Asparagus! :D

        • Marion in Savannah

          This is the time of year when it may be cheap — HIE THEE TO THE MARKET!

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Aye, aye Ma’am. :D

      • hendenburg2

        And just like asparagus, they make your pee smell weird.

        • Marion in Savannah

          Yeah, I’ve got that gene too… (Which is why having 2 bathrooms can be SUCH a blessing when both of us are afflicted…!)

      • JustDon’tSayFlatEarth

        We had a few rhizomes that produced a few spears. Then we started fostering dogs and pups. No part of our garden was un-dug. Deshalb, kein mehr Spargel…

        • Marion in Savannah

          Ya know, most times the animals we live with are better for us even than asparagus!

  • Nounverb911
    • Anna Elizabeth

      OMGLOL is this for Realz? That’s the funniest ass thing I’ve seen today!

      • hendenburg2
        • Jamoche

          “Juicero” sounds like something from a Simpsons late-night ad parody.

          • Caepan

            You mean the Juice Loosener?

          • Jamoche

            Whoa, the Simpsons really have done everything already.

          • tomamitai

            Sounds like a fish of the Hebrew persuasion.

        • JustDon’tSayFlatEarth

          Why o why o why did he not try that pitch on Shark Tank? I might start watching that stupid show again if they did.

  • Happy Birthday to me! Gifts from the universe….

  • Meccalopolis

    And there was much festivity amongst the elves

  • Jamoche

    Canada does everything better:
    http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/saskatoon/sask-ranchers-stunned-beaver-1.4073018

    On Friday, Ivey and her husband were surprised to see 150 of their heifers crowded together in one of their pastures.

    Curious about the strange behaviour, they investigated further, to find the herd of cattle following a beaver that had wandered along.

    • TJ Barke

      One of the strangest things I’ve ever seen was when a bald eagle attempted to fly off with someone’s goose, and accidentally dropped it in a cow pasture, the cows all ran over to see what was up, and when the terrified goose tried to scare them away they stomped it to death.

      • Jamoche

        Having been chased by a goose, I’d call that karmic justice. They’re mean suckers.

        • Which is why having the Canada Goose, the chief asshole of the Bird World, as the national bird of Canada is hilarious

          • Yr. Gma

            Well, we also have our loons.

          • Contemplative Ron

            But enough about the candidates for leader of the Conservative Party!

      • BadKitty904

        *looks at Teej*

        • TJ Barke

          It’s true!

          • BadKitty904

            I’m not saying it’s untrue. I’m saying it’s too weird.

          • TJ Barke

            Watched it all from my yard.

          • Yr. Gma

            Why didn’t you go rescue the poor thing?

          • TJ Barke

            Cause not my property.

          • Yr. Gma

            Oh.

          • Seek

            Also the damn bird would have attacked him and then they both would have been smashed by cows.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        “Mess with the herd, you get the horns, the very real probability that we will panic, flee in the wrong direction, and step all over you.”
        — America’s Dairy Cows

      • Beanz&Berryz

        That counts as an all-natural cluster fuck.

      • Meccalopolis

        I’ve been goosed by a grouse

    • Courser_Resistance

      Cows are curious creatures, They get fascinated by the weirdest things.

    • Yr. Gma

      That is very cute.

  • Vincent Ricola

    I hope he goes the AM talk radio route and tries to bogart all the nutter audience and it results in an epic Limbaugh vs O’Reilly douche ratings battle to the death (votes or something).

    • Latverian Diplomat

      IIRC he had a radio show for a while, but it wasn’t successful, because he was too lazy to do more than an hour, and the industry standard is three hour blocks.

  • Jurassic Ezio

    What are the odds you think of Breitbart picking him up?

    • BadKitty904

      God, I hope so.

    • weejee

      Does he have to die first?

    • jaspersdad

      New press secretary?

    • FlemmishSpy

      Daily Stormer?

  • FlemmishSpy

    Complaints come in, pervy old guys thrown out.
    Never a missed humiliation.

  • BadKitty904
  • Nounverb911
    • Yr. Gma

      He doesn’t know what “vulgarian” means. Too may syllables.

      • Doug Langley

        He thinks it’s Mr Spock’s planet.

      • shoeflyin

        I bet he does…he’s the original short fingered vulgarian as christened by Spy magazine iirc.

  • Jurassic Ezio

    Right wing pundits are like Hydra from the first Captain America movie though.

    Cut off one head and another will take it’s place. I mean Fox still has Hannity and Carlson.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Then we all have to be Avengers. I’ll be Black Widow.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        Natasha Romanoff: Thor, report on the Hulk.
        Thor: The gates of Hel are filled with the screams of his victims!
        [Natasha glares at him while Bruce groans and puts his head in his hands]
        Thor: But not the screams of the dead, of course. No, no… wounded screams… mainly whimpering, a great deal of complaining and tales of sprained deltoids and… gout.
        Umm…with votes?

        • Anna Elizabeth

          XD That’s my fave bit from Age of Ultron.

    • hendenburg2
      • HogeyeGrex

        Would that be called “Grammar Hydra?”

        • hendenburg2

          Nope. The Strategic Spelling Reserve!

  • Nounverb911
    • BadKitty904

      Good.

    • Marion in Savannah

      Karma — ain’t she a bitch?! (I’m now smiling one smile that runs around my face 3 times. Maybe 4…)

  • IOnlyLikeCats
  • JMP
  • Beanz&Berryz

    I’m so proud to be filthy!

  • jaspersdad
    • BadKitty904

      I think that will be the Verdict of History…

  • weejee

    FUCK IT impale Billo, we’ll do it live.

    • BearDeLaOursistance

      On a piece of evidence seized from the Branch Dildonian compound.

    • Strangely enough, it was his attempts to impale that got him fired.

  • Marion in Savannah

    So. It would appear that life may be worth living after all. YAY!

  • mrFawkes

    Devastaitng news for the troops. The 4-Star General for baby Jesus has left the building. Now, who will lead the War on Christmas? In Bills’ honor, I will build a nativity scene with a Wise Man sexually harassing his secretary. Thank you for your service General O’Reilly.

  • Right. So what’s the over/under on how long it’ll be before he’s spewing bullshit on CNN?

    • Vincent Ricola

      CNN has been dancing and laughing on his career grave all afternoon, so I’m guessing Sunday/Monday of next week.

    • Jgb979

      With Jeff Zucker still running the show ……

      This evening?

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    I prefer the dub version, myself:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DxxR8JFsvlc

    • Meccalopolis

      Stitches man. Watch this

  • Jgb979
  • shastakoala

    Unfair, unbalanced and afraid. Finally!

  • Nounverb911
  • BadKitty904

    So, our Long National Nightmare™, the War on Christmas, is over?

    • Edith Prickly

      Woot! All-night party at Osama’s homobortion pot-n-commie jizzporium!!

    • Vincent Ricola

      Holy shit – we won!

      • BadKitty904

        Time to bring home our troops…

      • FlemmishSpy

        It is the will of Allah.

    • Caepan

      Not as long as FOX “News” keeps their pet idiot Sean Hannity on the payroll.

      • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

        Hannity’s next.

        • If only Hannity would hit on the interns at FOX News. But he has a sexual predilection that runs much . . . darker.

          • Contemplative Ron

            Or at least hairier.

          • Now, now. There is no proof that the German Shepherd did no consent, even if Hannity had drawn his Luger.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      Everyone should send him the most generic “Happy Holidays!” card they can find, with “Good Riddance asshole!” and the foulest epithets they can think of written inside.

      • Maclare

        Year round!

      • Courser_Resistance

        Maybe we can get TLM to compose a little sumthin for us to put on the card

  • WiscoJoe

    Al Franken is now a well-respected Senator and Bill O’Reilly will spend the rest of his life whining about how he’s a “victim.” The arc of the moral universe is long but it bends towards justice and it’s crazy as fuck.

  • proudgrampa

    Wow. This is a great day! O’Reilly AND Chaffetz!!

    Break out the champagne!

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    To me, the two moments that stand out where the “George Tiller the Baby Killer” segments (that he quickly tried to disavow when someone actually killed Dr. Tiller by claiming when he said someone should take care of him he didn’t mean take care of him) and him claiming that the Malmedy massacre was a war crime perpetrated by U.S. troops against Nazi POWs in WWII (when in fact it was the other way around).

    • Anna Elizabeth

      The fuck? Fuck O’Reilly, and damn *anyone* that watches him.

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        You mean you didn’t know about this? Well, I’ll let Keith Olbermann take the wheel.
        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d0aAVifJqDE

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Yeah, I hadn’t heard this insanity. Kampfgrupe Peiper shot those GIs out-of-hand. Peiper’s unit had been known as the “Blowtorch Battalion” in Russia, because of all the villages they’d burned.

          Afterwards, American units simply did not take Waffen-SS prisoner, and would summarily execute any German with Blood Runes tattooed on them that they found. I shed no tears. The 12th SS Hitlerjugend massacred Canadian POWs in Normandy, and I believe 2nd SS Das Reich massacred both British soldiers and an entire town of French civilians as well. One may imagine the further crimes the Waffen-SS Committed in Russia.

        • Steely_Fan

          “…the sisyphus of morons” sums up Billo quite nicely, methinks.

    • janecita

      I had the pleasure of meeting Dr. Tiller at a conference years ago, he was a great man that didn’t deserve to be assassinated the way he was. His blood is on O’Reilly’s hands.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        O’Reilly should be in prison for that. I’m gratified that the sexual harassment crimes have brought him down at last, but I have to wonder at Fox and their corporate sponsors. Why now?

        • Riley Whodat Venable

          Murdoch’s sons are slowly taking over the business. They are a generation younger than Bill Orally. They may have the same political views, but Bill was costing them money. Loss of sponsors, payouts to women. Good ratings, but in the Fox Empire many things rate better.

          • Steely_Fan

            Lawrence O’Donnell had a great segment last night with Lisa Bloom who is representing Wendy Walsh and other victims of Billo’s harassment pro bono. She made it clear to Fox that she was going to persist until they fired his ass. I think she, along with the women who came forward, are really the heros in this story. http://www.msnbc.com/the-last-word/watch/bill-o-reilly-s-firing-and-the-women-who-made-it-happen-924973123716
            Then, when the advertisers deserted in droves, Fux saw the handwriting on the wall and threw in the towel.

          • Riley Whodat Venable

            I saw most of the show last night. You are correct. It was the strength of the women who brought BillO and Fox down.
            If the sons have sense enough to keep hiring strong, talented women and provide a safe workspace they will continue to lead in the ratings. Their viewers may be different, but they will have a lot of them.

    • Nockular cavity

      Yeah, he should never be forgiven on the basis of Tiller alone.

      And he thought we did Malmedy? Fuck. Gonna go out on a limb here and predict that, OTOH, he dismissed the My Lai and Haditha massacres, because they weren’t white people.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    We like the part where O’Reilly is very sad about how people like Franken are cheapening American political discourse.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/05d1ee3aa00bddbd6d8a6edc31bed1032359eefa49a8c2280a2d678a9f0bb626.jpg

    • BadKitty904

      Ha!

  • Courser_Resistance

    Because fucking magic is the obvious cause of all things.

    This is all kinds of awesome except that it came out of Bill O’Reilly’s mouth during a discussion about tides and the moon.

    No wonder science is an endangered species…

    • Jamoche

      Some people’s Clarke’s Law threshold (“any sufficiently advanced tech is indistinguishable from magic”) is very low. His is at zero.

      • AJ Milne

        Yep. I figure the targeted ads he gets online are mostly ‘Get the termites outta the mound with a twig and this one, weird trick…’

        (Regrettably, since the mouse is still beyond him, it’s of little help.)

  • jaspersdad

    Accusations come in, advertisers go out. No one can explain it.

    stolen from C&L

  • BearDeLaOursistance

    Keep fucking that career.

  • Reximus

    fyi…people who think Louise Mensch is just a conspiracy nut…check the date on her Chaffetz-is-out prediction https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/70bf061d141f1672b418384759649c6fa885b18d8a145daaa668b9baf796617f.png

    • proudgrampa

      WHOA! If true…

    • OrdinaryJoe

      Pee hookers in Provo?

    • mancityRed6
      • puredog

        I’m not certain — but I am pretty certain — that a “mensch” is a “man” of integrity and honor. It may have undergone a change in these more egalitarian times, but traditionally, I believe that is so.

        • mancityRed6

          don’t be sexist. a woman can be anything she wants to be ; )

        • mancityRed6

          snark, just in case

    • ltmcdies

      sometimes her line of reasoning is convoluted but then you get something likes this that plays out….I do think she has some solid sourcing

      • Steely_Fan

        Her writing on her Patribotics blog *seems* solid to me, but I don’t have the wherewithal to fact check her. She doesn’t draw many comments, or else mebbe she’s screening the trolls… In any case, her allegations are as specific and damning as any I’ve seen:
        https://patribotics.blog/

  • Christopher Story

    My favorite:
    Tides come in, tides go out. You can’t explain that.

    • Courser_Resistance

      I can, does that make me magic? Also too, the gravity of the moon controls all kinds of things!

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    And before I head out the door, can’t resist the second time today I get to use this gif:

    https://media.giphy.com/media/GRTLIhvNNQ11K/giphy.gif

    • O’Reilly would hit that.

      • Caepan

        Why would he hit her? She’s not his wife.

        • Because she was uppity? O’Reilly can’t stand the uppity.

      • OrdinaryJoe

        He’d call her Poke-a-hotness.

      • Creepoman

        And she would kick his nuts up to his spleen.

  • Ergoetal

    “But let’s not dwell on the future! Let’s celebrate the past…”

    God, Zoom, don’t ever stop :)

    • proudgrampa

      I know, right? The guy is a freakin’ genius.

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    “I am making Bill O’Reilly, who I don’t know, official advisor at Very Famous White House. Fox News: You’re fired!” #DeletedTrumpTweets

  • Nounverb911

    Serena was pregnant when she won the Australian Open!
    https://twitter.com/thedailybeast/status/854736414130524161

    • Courser_Resistance

      Worked for her! Yay! So much for the myth that women are fragile creatures who ‘need to take it easy’ before and during pregnancy. A healthy, active mother is a wonderful thing. Congratulations to Ms. Williams!

    • TundraGrifter

      I’ll bet she’d kick Alex Jones’ butt around the block without working up a sweat.

      • Vecchioivan

        I’d pay to see that.

      • hendenburg2

        I’m sure she could. But it would be more fun if she DID.

        (by virtue of the extra kick-voting effort)

    • Proud Liberal

      With Drake’s baby?

  • Jurassic Ezio

    OT: My father fell on the concrete while doing some yard work this afternoon and got cut and hit his head. He seems okay right now and I went with him to a nearby walk in clinic. They told me to keep an eye out on him for the next 6 hours to make sure his brain is not injured and to monitor for any symptoms so I am kinda on edge right now. Could use some good vibes.

    • jesterpunk

      Hope he is ok.

    • Meccalopolis

      {{{{{{{{Vibes}}}}}}}}}

    • Nockular cavity

      Hope he’s well. Here are some good vibes:
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_rTICMVXQQ

    • Proud Liberal

      My thoughts are with you both. Please keep us updated on his condition.

      • Jurassic Ezio

        Okay. They told me he shouldn’t go to sleep until about 10 just to be sure so I’m hoping he’ll be okay after that too.

        • Proud Liberal

          He should be okay if he isn’t getting sleepy now. Does he have a concussion?

          • Jurassic Ezio

            They didn’t say that. They said that he would need to go for a Cat scan now or wait 6 hours to see if any symptoms come up. He didn’t want to go to the ER and I couldn’t force him to so we went home with the instructions f waiting 6 hours and cleaning the wound.

        • Riley Whodat Venable

          He will likely be fine. Look into his eyes a few times this evening. If the pupils aren’t the same size you should take him back to the ER.

          • Jurassic Ezio

            You mean like if one is bigger than the other?

          • Riley Whodat Venable

            Exactly.

          • Jurassic Ezio

            I checked last night and this morning and they looked fine to me. He still seems normal though he says his neck bothers him a little. We’re going to the doctor again just to let him know.

          • Riley Whodat Venable

            So good to see. I’ll bet he is fine. He is lucky to have you around to help.

      • Jurassic Ezio

        I mean since we got home he made dinner and seems like he always does (albeit a little shaken up).

    • BadKitty904

      Here’s hoping Dad’s on the mend.

      And perhaps this will help distract you a tad…

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHbLuIxw3y4

    • Doug Langley
    • hendenburg2

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eab_beh07HU

      Apparently, Marky Mark “Mark” Wahlberg also recorded a song called good Vibrations, but I’m assuming that we’re trying to wish you well.

    • janecita

      I’m sorry about your dad. Some good vibes coming your way.
      https://youtu.be/kDxQr-s26t8

      • ltmcdies

        okay loved that…

        • janecita

          I love Paul Simon!

    • Vincent Ricola

      Good vibes being sent.

    • Anna Elizabeth
    • TundraGrifter

      I send to you and your family the best vibes since Lionel Hampton and Johnny Otis.

    • Parakeetist

      Hug

    • Persistent Demme

      Now, tell the truth.
      This very same thing happened to me when my daughter was riding Mr. Demme and pretending he was an elephant.
      Are you sure he was “doing some yard work?”

      Seriously though, hope all is well.

      • Jurassic Ezio

        Mowing the lawn counts as yard work? He fell by the sidewalk where the concrete is.

        • Persistent Demme

          I’m just so glad he didn’t do MORE damage!
          All my best!

  • Andrew Rheinheimer

    This is great and all, but when will Hannity die in the eyes of the baby Jesus and Ann Coulter?

    Now we play the waiting game…

    • Contemplative Ron

      I’m tired of the waiting game. Let’s play ‘Hungry Hungry Hippo.’

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “Well that should do it…we will never have another sexual harassment issue ever again…”
    — Fox News, being perhaps a bit over optimistic

    • Caepan

      Until goats can sue over sexual assault, Sean Hannity’s career will be OK.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        “I thought all goats were always up for a good blowing?”
        — Sean Hannity [ALLEGEDLY!]

  • DerpyGurdyMan

    Adios, O’Reilly Fucker.
    You don’t deserve your severance package.
    You do, however, deserve to have your package severed.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      With votes.

  • Vincent Ricola

    The deep state liberal machine is coming for you next, Fucker Carlson, better start stocking up on bow ties and male hair dye while you still got a paycheck.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “This is my moment!”
    — Geraldo Rivera prepares to make a move?

    • The Wanderer

      I’m waiting for him to lose control of his mustache on live TV.

      • snark-lurker

        “lose” control? ha!

      • Boscoe

        It DOES kinda look like it’s trying to pull itself off his face…

    • FlemmishSpy

      “Now somebody light the bag.”

    • Caepan

      “Hmmph! They don’t give prime time spots to your kind, ‘Jerry’!”
      — permanent legacy Tucker Swanson Frozen Dinners Carlson, swishing by Geraldo’s cubicle.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        “But…I’m one of the goods ones! Just ask Bill.”
        — Geraldo Rivera

  • Vecchioivan

    I won’t be happy until this shitgibbon is bankrupted by all the women coming forward to sue his toxic ass.

    • Vincent Ricola

      Yes. No more grabbing money from the Fox office petty cash harassment box. He needs to pay with his own money from now on.

  • The Wanderer
  • TundraGrifter

    Certainly among Bull O’Really?’s greatest hits is going after the young man who lost his father in the 9/11 NYC attack. Bull knows more about the gentleman than his own son.

    The man’s son – not Bull’s.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “We just realized that when people check the “Yes, I am a misogynistic creep’ box on their job application, we shouldn’t hire them. We had that the wrong way round.”
    — Fox News HR

  • Upright Ape

    That “farm upstate” must be gittin’ crowded.

    • mancityRed6

      there’s still enough room for Tucker, Hannity, and all of the couch crotch crew.

  • Those who lost loved ones in 9/11 can go to bed tonight knowing they won’t be yelled at and have their mikes cut off.

  • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

    Anypony else tired of all this winning yet? Because I’m not.

  • Yr. Gma

    Hey, Central California Wonkers, what’s up with the Fresno shooter? It’s getting very little play down south here.

  • OrdinaryJoe

    Billo gono. LOLO

    • Proud Liberal

      Clevero.

    • BearDeLaOursistance

      And probably syph, too.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    My only concern is, doesn’t the NSC have a post-Bannon opening right now?

  • Gorillionaire

    And the punch line is Tucker Carlson!

    • Meccalopolis

      The aristocrat!

  • Ninja0980

    Goodbye O’Reilly, you miserable worthless vile piece of shit.

  • Michael R
    • Vecchioivan
    • Vincent Ricola

      One of the Trump boys? Maybe the Beavis one that doesn’t talk very much.

    • mancityRed6

      I swear I saw talk earlier that Hannity was going to move into his spot

    • Contemplative Ron

      … a large pile of week-old hyena shit. His loyal viewers are not expected to notice any change.

    • Nockular cavity

      The Moon. How’d it get there?

    • BadKitty904

      Mike Huckabee? Chris Christie?

    • mancityRed6

      Ham Rove, dubbed by Spicer?

    • boyblue123

      One hour of scrolling Brietbart comment section

      • mancityRed6

        it’s going to have to be extra slow for their viewership.

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    Guardians of the Galaxy Awesome Mix Volume 2’s track list just dropped. 14 songs on this one:

    “Mr. Blue Sky” by Electric Light Orchestra, “Lake Shore Drive” by Aliotta Haynes Jeremiah, “Bring It On Home to Me” by Sam Cooke, “Southern Nights” by Glenn Campbell, “My Sweet Lord” by George Harrison, “Brandy (You’re a Fine Girl)” by Looking Glass, “Come a Little Bit Closer” by Jay and the Americans, “Wham Bam Shang-a-Lang” by Silver, “Surrender” by Cheap Trick, “Father and Son” by Cat Stevens, “Flash Light” by Parliament
    The last song is an original track called “Guardians Inferno” by The Sneepers (feat. David Hasselhoff)

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Sweet! XD I’m trying to get brave enough to go see this in-theater. The theater is one mile away, no probs, but I haven’t been in one since I came out.

      • Contemplative Ron

        DO EET. You cannot appreciate the awesomeness that is Rocket on the small screen.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Yeah, Ima going to, probably a matinee after opening weekend is past.

          My BFF bought me the first one digital when she learned I hadn’t seen it, and I *adore* it!

        • Nockular cavity

          Rocket is totes le awesome.

    • Shanzgood

      SQUEEE!

    • Contemplative Ron

      Yay, I can put the album together and listen to it on my way TO the theater!

    • Anna Elizabeth
  • Manhattan123

    Here’s the thing I would ask the right-wing nuts who are claiming this is all a liberal plot to “get” O’Reilly: why didn’t they do this to Sean Hannity? He is, by any objective measure, more conservative than O’Reilly, more of a Republican lapdog. Certainly more of a Trump toady.

    Despite his odious politics, though, there has never been any whispers that Hannity treats women around him this way.

    O’Reilly has paid $13 million to settle claims against him over the years, claims he said were all lies. I don’t care how much money you have, you don’t pay that kind of cash to make fake charges go away.

    • mancityRed6

      tRump is going to pay almost twice that in his “university” lawsuit.
      yeah, but they’re all innocent, aren’t they?

    • BadKitty904

      If liberals could plot effectively enough to “get” someone, I doubt Bill O’Reilly would be at the top of their list.

    • jesterpunk

      If liberals where that powerful then why the hell is Trump president and why isnt he impeached yet?

  • Shibusa

    I’d never seen the Franken/O’Really bit. That was great.

  • mancityRed6
    • hendenburg2

      That banner gets passed around Fox like a joint at a Phish concert

    • Boscoe

      Hmm… coincidentally, Billo declared victory last year. Did he know there would be no more sequels?

      WHAT DID HE KNOW AND WHEN DID HE KNOW IT?????

  • Jeffocaster in the desert

    Shit, he will be back. Just like the NCAA went back on all the Penn State shit, and the bathroom bill, Fox or some equally slimy outlet will let him back on the air. Maybe the Pussygrab channel?

    • mancityRed6

      so after tRump resigns, he can finally start his own tv channel?

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        From prison?

        • mancityRed6

          Pence will pardon him, just so long as tRump keeps his mouth shut.
          so president Paul Ryan by the end of the year?

          • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

            Hatch if we’re lucky.

  • TundraGrifter

    Say, up in Harlem at a table for two the folks in a little restaurant are saying “Great! Now we’ll never see his cracker ass here again!”

    • Nockular cavity

      Motherfuckers, bring the iced tea!”

  • capnkrunch

    How da Moon get dere?
    How da Moon get dere?
    How da Moon get dere?
    How da Moon get dere?
    How da Moon get dere?
    How da Sun get dere?

    My thoughts when reading this were something like “moondere, sundere, tsundere”.

    So I googled “tsundere moon” which turned up My Little Pony. And that’s how I spent the last half an hour at work.

    https://derpicdn.net/img/view/2013/11/22/478454__safe_artist-colon-4as_nightmare+moon_animated_blob_blushing_chibi_flash_game_i+am+the+night_link_poking_touch_tsundere_tsundere+moon.gif

    • msanthropesmr

      You probably work for the goverment.

    • Vecchioivan

      Thank you for your service.

    • Me not sure

      Put in for overtime?

  • jesterpunk

    Who could forget John Stewart making BillO look stupid on his own show.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YO_om3iK9kE

    Or Bill Nye the science guy

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5PPjFySihk

    Or John Stewart debating BillO

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SPqXIfDYlZg

    Or Letterman and BillO

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WS1KYcrJSXQ

  • msanthropesmr

    Something tells me its all happening at the zoo.

    • Contemplative Ron

      I do believe it. I do believe it’s true.

  • Marion in Savannah

    OT, and possibly even a bit of a buzz kill given this post, but let us all please bow our heads in prayer ONE MORE TIME for the poor fucking coal miners that the NYT is still weeping and wringing its corporate hands over:

    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/04/19/business/economy/united-mine-workers-retiree-health-plan.html

    It would appear that they have some concerns about their health plan…

    (Oh, fergawdsake, JUST KILL ME NOW RATHER THAN MAKE ME READ ANOTHER ONE OF THESE FUCKING STORIES….)

  • Boscoe

    My most cherished Billo memory was that one dream I had that time where he was bullying someone so I kicked the snot out of him.

    • Me not sure

      Ahhhhh. Good times.

    • mancityRed6

      dammit, why couldn’t I have this dream?

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      I have dreams like that about Hannity. Billo is (was) vile, but for me, Hannity takes it to a whole ‘nother level.

  • Michael R

    I’m wondering if Franken is going to run in 2020 .

    ” We love America just as much as they do. But in a different way. You see, they love America like a 4-year-old loves his mommy. Liberals love America like grown-ups. To a 4-year-old, everything Mommy does is wonderful and anyone who criticizes Mommy is bad. Grown-up love means actually understanding what you love, taking the good with the bad and helping your loved one grow. Love takes attention and work and is the best thing in the world.

    That’s why we liberals want America to do the right thing. We know America is the hope of the world, and we love it and want it to do well. ”

    Al Franken … Lies: And the Lying Liars Who Tell Them (2004).

    • mancityRed6

      I still have that book…somewhere…

      • notaten

        Along with, Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Liar.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “Why not me?”
      — Al Franken (*)

      (*) I didn’t even make that one up, it’s a book and everything. :)

  • sgt. jmk of the résistance

    I just listened to the Fresh Air interview again and was just astounded at how utterly condescending that idiot was to Terry Gross throughout the entire thing. He came in loaded for bear, and was as rude as rude could be.

    What a fucking piece of shit that man is.

    • Hardly Ideal

      I’m not sure if I actually heard it in real time or if I just heard a recap, but man. Terry Gross has got to be one of the most mild-mannered newspeople out there, and he just blew up on her.

      This guy would flip off a cardboard box full of kittens if he ever thought they were slandering him somehow.

  • msanthropesmr
  • Hardly Ideal

    *plays sad music for Billo on the world’s tiniest piano*
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QUVHhG_QX_k

    • ltmcdies

      piano still too big

  • Poly_Ester

    Might I suggest that Billo would make a good straight-man to pair with Alex Jones.

    • BadKitty904

      The Abbott and Costello of Evil…

    • Vincent Ricola

      This can only work if Alex Jones keeps his shirt on, otherwise Billo will start making gross sex comments about his boobs and we’ll be right back at square one.

    • Persistent Demme

      I’ll have nightmares tonight of a Bannon, Coulter, and O’Reilly show.
      (Too bad “The Three Stooges” is not available.)
      .

  • SammyDEEEE
  • Msgr_MΩment

    Bill O’Reilly Has Tried To Fucked It, Done It Live For The Very Last Time

    Yep, that’s what brought the fucker down.

  • msanthropesmr

    Just cause they’re under appreciated

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UfpZJa3LWIA

    • mancityRed6

      John Peel is a freaking genius

  • Anna Elizabeth

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-C_3eYj-pOM&index=12&list=PLpRjkOHBe_TgmznCle__jWDhoV4aFgCjw

    You said it yourself, Bitch, we’re the Guardians of the Galaxy!

    • mancityRed6

      be me: ’94, part time at a second run theater ($1 shows) where I got paid student wages. sister act 2 is playing. frequently walk in an out enough that I can easily say I saw the whole movie. that song (or a cover of it) is the credits song. it’s taken me since then to be able to listen to it again.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Yikees! XD I’m glad I have better memories of this ‘un.

  • ♚ King Leo ♚
    • boyblue123

      consolidating power?

      • BadKitty904

        I certainly doubt it’s accidental.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      This is just rank incompetence. I would have expected them to have some really bad attorneys in the wings. I’ve encountered many of them.

  • boyblue123

    The only half-decent thing BillO did was give Jon Stewart a voice on Faux News occasionally

  • Rick Hill
    • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

      Yes, Her Majesty’s a fucking badass who would whoop Lord Dampnut if he even thought about grabbing her.

    • msanthropesmr

      She was a mechanic IIRC.

      • jesterpunk
        • ltmcdies

          just thought about this pic

      • Riley Whodat Venable

        There is a story that one of the Saudi kings visited some years ago. She popped him in one of her Land Rovers, hopped in the Driver’s seat, and took him hi-speed four wheeling. It is rumored that the King needed to change his robes.

      • Contemplative Ron

        And I believe ambulance driver.

  • DainBramage

    Next stop for O’Really? Sitting on the front porch yelling at kids who walk by.

    • Vincent Ricola

      Worst HOA president ever.

      • msanthropesmr

        That’s probably Jeffocaster in the Desert (I KID I KID!)

      • BearDeLaOursistance

        He’ll run around asking everybody whether their curtains match their drapes…

    • notaten

      Hey! That’s my job! Oh, but I’m not an obnoxious bigoted asshole. I just do it because I’m an old. :(

  • Poly_Ester

    Billo replaced by a fourth banana? Really?

  • So, finally, on their 6pm news, FOX News reports that O’Reilly is gone. “As you may have already heard” was the lead in.

    FOX News: “As you may have already heard” TM

    • JMP

      Well of course Fox wouldn’t know about their own company’s action until long after everybody else has reported on it.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    “I’m an a analyst…”
    Bill-O puts the anal lube in analyst.

    • BearDeLaOursistance

      I always think of him in Spanish — as more of an anal-ISIS.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        a daeshbag

  • Apple Scruff

    I’ve been seeing a lot of Debbie Downers around the liberal interwebz today in regards to Jon Ossoff.

    OH HE WON’T WIN IN JUNE!

    OH THE DEMS ONCE AGAIN SNATCHED DEFEAT FROM THE JAWS OF VICTORY!

    OH THE DEMS WILL SCREW IT UP FOR SURE!

    And to all of you, I say this:

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/1ad652c733288116c045a1dcee07dcc830c739867a3084b96bba002f815c8643.gif

    • ltmcdies

      some are trolls some are bots and some are bros attempting to defend their preferred narrative.

      Ossoff pulled off quite the thing last night and only an idiot with an agenda is trying pretend otherwise.
      That GOP district ought to have never been in play

      • Apple Scruff

        Yeah, the ones I’ve seen seem to be Brogressives who just like to bitch and moan that the DNC isn’t doing their job. I’d say they must be fun at parties, but I doubt they get invited to any.

        • Vincent Ricola

          Parties are for neolib corporate shills!!1!

        • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

          They tend to gatecrash them, then rather publically announce they’re going back to their own microbrewery kegger just when it gets time to tidy up.

          • Apple Scruff

            Gatecrash, mope in the corner, complain about the non-artisinal beer, brag that they can do better, get rejected by the cute girl, and then call her a ‘bitch’ as he stomps out the door.

          • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

            And complain/brag for the next two years that he “could have had her”.

        • ltmcdies

          well it doesn’t help when their Fearless Leader says shit like this
          https://twitter.com/eclecticbrotha/status/854814346081337344

          • Apple Scruff

            It irritates me that Tom Perez has brought Bernie along with him on his tour. Stop pandering to the Bros! Tom should be bringing Maxine Waters!

          • Persistent Demme

            STFU, Bernie!

      • Me not sure

        You are correct. If you’ve not lived and worked in the GA 6th, you have no idea how backward-ass red it has been. This, however, is a district on the verge of a demographic change and when it flips Georgia might just flip with it. Ossof can still win if we organize, donate and turn the fuck out.

        • Apple Scruff

          If I remember correctly, Hillary, while not winning Georgia, closed the gap a bit in November. Georgia is definitely starting to lean purple.

          • Me not sure

            She lost the 6th by 1&1/2%. It keeps the Republicans who are realists up at night trying to figure how to suppress more of the vote.

          • Apple Scruff

            THAT is what worries me. Voter suppression and all around GOP shenanigans.

          • Me not sure

            Stay worried, my friend.

          • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

            We really need to send observers. There were some really shady shenanigans already.

          • Ω cynmac will never surrender

            By population, GA is deep purple. Gerrymandering keeps it lavender. What will be interesting is when Senator Isakson comes up for reelection in 2018. #1 He has Parkinson’s and #2 he has been voting the party line, as a sock puppet. How does he play the few cards in his hand? Inquiring minds want to know.

          • Me not sure

            He can be beaten. His familiy’s real estate shenanigans and his record of non performance, not to mention his lack of any charisma whatsoever, make him vulnerable to a hard nosed energetic candidate.

          • Ω cynmac will never surrender

            What’s sad is that Johnny Isakson used to be a mainstream Republican. Pretty moderate. But he went along with the flow and is now on the wrong side of history.

          • Me not sure

            There is no rule that says you can’t be on the band wagon, the clown car and the gravy train at the same time. …No, wait … that’s only metaphorically possible.

          • Ω cynmac will never surrender

            Trump only won the state by 51% but got all 16 electoral votes.

          • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

            Thanks electoral college!

        • puredog

          I amy be one of those Debbie Downers, since I posted that Ossoff is a chicken we shouldn’t count before he hatches. (Still smarting from November, I’ll be the first to admit it.) But “if we organize, donate and turn the fuck out,” yeah, he wins.

        • Ω cynmac will never surrender

          A lot of the RWNJs have moved even farther out, which is why the GOP tried to swing some last minute gerrymandering the latest lege session, pushing black folks out of districts they are close to losing. Did not and will not stand!

          • Me not sure

            They can’t run far enough. Douglas County, west of Atlanta was a red-neck red-vote county since the civil rights years. Since the last census it has gone majority minority and the whites there don’t seem to like it one bit.
            That’s where the Klan birthday terrorists were tried and sentenced hard.

          • Ω cynmac will never surrender

            Yep. Those guys acted surprised too, like the “Hold My Beer” defense would work. Here on the Eastside, we have Rockdale and Newton counties. Even Coweta is mostly Hispanic.

      • Claire

        Ossoff got 48.1% and that miserable Handel woman got 19.8%. That was a goddamn bloodbath. He got as many votes as his next four competitors put together. Sure, the runoff will be close and he may yet lose, but what he’s done so far has been impressive all by itself.

    • h4rr4r

      Not even 2 points. You know there are more than that many youngs that stayed home.

      I just hope Trump keeps being Trump, that will help in June. Odds are low Trump stops being Trump.

      • Apple Scruff

        Yeah, Team Ossoff really needs to go after the young vote. He’s totes adorbs and a cool nerd all in one. They could market the shit out of that.

        • Meccalopolis

          He could smile once in a while. Its like he’s afraid they’ll call him young

          • Ω cynmac will never surrender

            They’ve already done that. There is a negative ad that they stopped running that called him a liar about his experience, citing that he would have been in high school to match the years of experience Ossoff claimed. Not accounting for how you can gain skills concurrently. Math? How does that work?
            I just can’t believe they were still running the nerd cosplay one up until the election. And the Perdue “He’s one of US!” ad for Moody was desperation incarnate.
            Can you tell that I’ve been popping popcorn?!?

          • Apple Scruff

            He needs to own his age. He can be a little too serious. He needs to relax and BE Han Solo!

          • Meccalopolis

            Thank you. He has a nice smile too

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      I live in GA, next to GA-06 in Ga-05 and I have not seen any such posts. If these assholes are out-of-state, what do they plan to do next year in 2018? Atlanta, Savannah, Columbus/Albany and Athens are the GA Islands of Blue and we’re fighting, dammit.

      • Apple Scruff

        Oh, most certainly the crabby patties are all out-of-state. Everyone within Georgia has been cheering the results.

    • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

      The Dems in no way need to flip places as red as GA-06 to win back the House.
      that’s extra bonus territory, and Ossoff did fantastically well to get high 40’s, whatever happens in June.

      • Apple Scruff

        I think we’re all watching this because it’s one of the first races and it’s been getting a lot of attention. I’m ready to donate more and volunteer (if I can, I live in NJ).

        • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

          Indeed. These are like dry runs for the Governerships and midterms coming up over the next couple of years.

          And the POTUS’ party always gets knocked back in midterms. Checks and balances.
          At least, that’s how it’s worked in the past. Fuck knows now in our brave new world.

    • Vecchioivan

      If we all pull together we could lose this for sure! Goooooooooo Dems!!

    • JustDon’tSayFlatEarth

      Best political shock of my voting life was when we lived in a part of the Austin ‘burbs that was supposed to be safely red. A couple weeks before the general, suddenly the push-poll robocalls started for the GOP candidate (named Jack Stick, not making this up). The Party apparently learned at the last minute how purple the district (which, btw, they gerrymandered into being) actually was. Dem Mark Strama got elected. Good news (Bad news is Shrub won thanks to some Chad dude in Fla.)

      • Apple Scruff

        Jack Stick! LOL. I’m totally going to use that now in place of “Jack Squat”.

        Q-How much does Trump know about foreign policy?

        A- JACK STICK!

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      I think most of them are trolls. It will start early with this one. russian trolls with their intended narrative.

      • Yr. Gma

        Some not-trolls from around here were whining about losing on a different thread today.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      The fact that he nearly pulled off a straight win in a District as deep red as GA-06 (Price won reelection there by over 20 points, and while it was trending purple it is still by all measure a safely GOP District) is going to put some serious fear into the RNC that they will have to expend resources in areas where they thought they were invulnerable. Spread the field strategy, make them play defense for a change.

      • Meccalopolis

        If we contest every race

        • puredog

          FITTY STATE! FITTY STATE!

    • Yr. Gma

      Agreed. I’m sick of the pessimists. What’s the alternative? Roll over and let the Repubes eat your entrails from your warm belly?

    • Persistent Demme

      You know, sometimes you can blame the Dems, but not this time.

    • guppy06

      But it’s what we do!

  • Undocumented Skwerl!

    Who is this O’Reaily guy?

  • Ω cynmac will never surrender

    “Hot Chocolate”? Rlly? I’ve worked with sexists in my career in IT, but none of them ever went so far.
    I was asked once is I was a mulatto, but that’s racist with a dash of sexism. And my answer was no, I was a quadroon since my great-grandpappy was white. Shut it down by also revealing that he was a rapist. My white looking grandpa did not pass for white, like others in my linage, but stayed in the black community and fought for civil rights from the inside.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    This just in: Bill O’Reilly no longer considered eligible to guest on Fox&Friends.

    No word on whether an appearance on Fox & Embarrassing Former Employees is in the cards.

    • Vecchioivan

      “Fox & That Guy We Don’t Like To Talk About”

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      Bill is an unperson now.

  • Shoto

    Who gets the O’Reilly time slot? Discuss.

  • JustDon’tSayFlatEarth

    Does this mean we don’t need Brolly Bunny anymore? (Answer: we will always need B https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/a367307389df75ef0c1f7cef27f0950e283485f0f5b19deb296663c5b53f7152.jpg rolly Bunny)

    • jesterpunk

      Hannity, Trump and the rest of them are still around. So that image always has a use.

  • SnarkON

    Falafel for dinner?

  • DainBramage
    • msanthropesmr

      Sauron need not lie to corrupt men’s souls.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        He can no longer take on a pleasing form however.

  • Shoto
    • Apple Scruff

      These never get old.

  • OrdinaryJoe

    O’RIelly is now in the No Falafel Zone.

  • Assuming our country will eventually correct its course, can you imagine how history is gonna treat these chuckleheads?

    • Pinkham’s Law

      Slightly better than they’ll be treated if the US doesn’t correct its course. Being the fascists who ALMOST subverted a country is marginally less-bad than being the fascists who were successful at such subversion.

    • Meccalopolis

      It will be unprecedented. The only one I can think of to compare them to is Benedict Arnold and he outshines them by virtue of his bravery for the revolution

  • OrdinaryJoe

    Wonder how Ailes and Billo decided who was gunna hit on which blonde?

    • jesterpunk

      Rock, paper, sexual harassment?

      • vivian

        Does Grope beat paper or rock, I forget.

        • jesterpunk

          Grope beats rock, paper (lawsuit) beats grope.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        “Loofah, falafel, dingus” is how I play it.
        — Bill O’Reilly

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “Let’s walk over, and hit on ’em all”…to paraphrase an old joke. :(

    • FlemmishSpy

      Ailes to Billo: “You bring the falafel, I got the burger.”

      • Bobathonic

        Ewww.

  • Michael R
  • vivian

    Oh Really? O’Reilly is gone?

    Hi ho the merry-o
    Sing it high
    sing it low

    • Vecchioivan

      Billo is icumen out
      Lhude sing haha
      Grabeth puss
      and bloweth job
      and screweth you boohoo
      Sing haha

  • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

    Now let’s go after Hannity.

    • CindyinEncinitas

      I want Rush!

      • WomanInThePersistence
        • Marion in Savannah

          [WHEW] I was getting SO ready to say/post really bad things…

          • WomanInThePersistence

            Don’t let me get in your way. :)

        • guppy06

          BUILD THE WALL!

      • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

        One at a time. It has worked well so far.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    My stars and garters – good news?!? It feels sooooooo……..wierd.

    • snark-lurker

      GARTERS! Woo Hoo! : )

      • Marion in Savannah

        Calm down, honey — you’ve never seen what A Old like me (or my mother in days gone by) could do with garters. It ain’t what you’re imagining…

        • snark-lurker

          aww : ( i can dream tho

      • Anna Elizabeth

        I love garter belts and stockings, they are much more comfortable than pantyhose.

  • Apple Scruff

    Game time! What is more embarrassing:

    Lil Kim’s failed missile launch.

    or

    President Cheeto Dust’s fake North Korean-bound “armada”.

    • jesterpunk

      Yes.

      • Apple Scruff

        These two, they’re like peas in a rotting, mold-covered pod.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Just waiting for the “Kim Jong Un’s not a bad guy.” reversal when someone explains to Trump that he’s another authoritarian jackhole.

      • jesterpunk

        I hear that Kim Jong Un is a great guy, very impressive what he has done.

        http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/trump-north-korean-leader-kim-jong-gotta-give/story?id=36198345

        “How many young guys — he was like 26 or 25 when his father died —
        take over these tough generals, and all of a sudden … he goes in, he
        takes over, and he’s the boss,” Trump said. “It’s incredible. He wiped
        out the uncle, he wiped out this one, that one. I mean this guy doesn’t
        play games. And we can’t play games with him.”

    • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

      One has trouble getting it up; the other can’t even find it.

    • Doug Langley

      All that’s missing is Three Stooges sound fx.

      • Contemplative Ron

        Oh, wise guy, hunh? <poink!>

  • No doubt Tucker Carlson is going to have some Big Depends to fill in Muttonhead’s time slot.

    • Vecchioivan
    • satanscheerleadersloveamerica

      fucker carlson will be interesting, from what I’ve seen, and yes most of the fox news I have seen is from lefty websites, fucker is just a whiny twit where as billdo is a loud obnoxious asshole.

  • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

    More Russian interference evidence http://mobile.reuters.com/article/idUSKBN17L2N3

    • Me not sure

      A death by 1,000 cuts draws ever nearer.

  • OrdinaryJoe

    Take away. There are other ways to “vote” that get attention. This was driven by the loss of ad revenue. Sponsors listen.

    • Vecchioivan

      It’s almost like they understand that women have money to spend.

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        Oh do I have stories of condescending car salesmen. Last new car I bought was in 1989, I hate them so much.

        • Vecchioivan

          Did he point out how handy the rearview mirror for fixing your make up?

          • Ω cynmac will never surrender

            Nah. It was always when it came to negotiating price. The first time I went to buy a car on my own in 1984, I wanted a Mazda 626 and the guy assumed that I couldn’t afford it. But I was working as part of a sales team and I had a car allowance. When he said that he thought I’d be better in a 323, I reamed him out in front of his boss and walked out.

    • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

      See? It IS possible to take them down with lots and lots of votes!

  • Nick Scroggs

    Don’t forget that weird revenge novel he wrote.

  • Claire

    So according to Rachel Maddow, not only do we have a teleporting invisible armada on Friday, we also have a DOD spokesman who doesn’t exist, and a press release denying his existence that, when checked, proves to be on another topic entirely.

    I fear we have put too great a strain on the Matrix, you guys.

    https://twitter.com/maddow/status/854793031987458048

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “That little plastic ship model from the war room got caught on my cuff link again.”
      — Donald Trump

    • The Wanderer

      “The more you overwork the plumbing, the easier it is to stop up the drains.” – Commander Montgomery Scott, UFP Starfleet

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Slight correction, Mon Cher at the time, Montgomery Scott was Captain of Engineering.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      The suspension of disbelief finally snapped.

    • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

      Comment on Jester Actual’s twitter feed about this https://twitter.com/scudworx/status/854828205445971968

      • Claire

        That link goes to the Reuters article about the think tank. I looked at his feed, though, and oh my god, I think he’s right. https://twitter.com/th3j35t3r

        • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

          Yeah crappy copy paste issues with my phone. Now fixed.

  • Michael R

    I hope I don’t end my day with an image of Bill O’Reilly fucking stuck in my head .

    • Anna Elizabeth
      • The Wanderer

        O.O

      • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

        Is this an example of the much-vaunted side boob I keep hearing about?

        • The Wanderer

          The mythical and elusive Side Boob!

        • Anna Elizabeth

          It is indeed, Mon Cher. Perhaps the ultimate example, what with featuring Scarlett.

        • Meccalopolis

          That us sine qua non of side boob

        • Jeffocaster in the desert

          No, that would be Mike Pence.

          • snark-lurker

            YOU! STFU Grrrrrrr

      • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

        Mon Dieu!

      • snark-lurker

        YOU TRYIN TO HEART-ATTACK ME?! WOWOWOWOWOWOW

      • jesterpunk

        Have you seen Kate Upton’s lipsync battle preview video?

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ibPYtFQaGLI

        • Anna Elizabeth

          I need that outfit, perhaps I’ll look on Amazon when I get back from my bunk.

          • jesterpunk

            The full episode will be on tomorrow night at 10pm eastern time.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Ooh, I hope I remember

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Ok, where did you get that video of me?

      • DainBramage

        Why is she holding her boob before she realizes someone’s there?

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Because Hollywood hates us.

        • JustDon’tSayFlatEarth

          Admit it. If you had that boob, you’d hold it, wouldn’t you?

          • mancityRed6

            and I’d never leave the apartment again.

          • puredog

            “I’ll be in my bunk with my boob.”

    • BearDeLaOursistance

      And I hope I don’t end my day with “The Safety Dance” stuck in my head. There — turnabout is fair play. :-p

  • Juan de Fuca

    My favorite Bill O’Reilly moment was the time he clashed with Al Franken in the video above. I still have Franken’s book, “Lies: And the Lying Liars Who Tell Them: A Fair and Balanced Look at the Right.”

    IIRC, the book led to O’Reilly challenging Franken to a fist fight (probably not the smartest thing since Franken was a highschool wrestler in Minnesota) and Fox later challenging him in a lawsuit to prevent him from using “Fair and Balanced” on the cover of Franken’s book. Franken replied by saying he had trademarked the word “funny” and joked that Fox violated his intellectual property rights by claiming that he was “unfunny” in the lawsuit. Fox lost the case and Franken’s book suddenly rose from #489 to #1 on Amazon’s best seller list.

    Fast forward 14 years and Franken is now a US Senator while O’Reilly finally got fired from his position at Fox News.

    Tide goes in, tide goes out. You can’t explain that.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fox_v._Franken

    • mancityRed6

      I bought that book in a grocery store not long after I moved back to the states.

      • Juan de Fuca

        I ordered the book whilst living in Australia’r. I was kinda sitting on the fence back then as a young USAF NCO and it kinda opened my eyes a little re. the right wing media in America. I also just fact checked myself and it seems as though O’Reilly is the guy who mentioned something about going back to the old wild west days and talked about challenging Franken to a gun fight. Because these types of folks always wanna go back to the good ‘ol days of the wild west.

        It was Franken who challenged RWNJ Rick Lowry to a fistfight after Lowry wrote that leftist’s were promoting “the feminization of America, and called for a defense of traditional notions of masculinity.” Lowry backed down, of course and wrote an article explaining how he would’ve ruined the old chap but didn’t want to lower himself to fighting a guy he just called a wimp because Gary Cooper wouldn’t have done it.

        I can’t even with these folks.

        http://www.nationalreview.com/article/220176/why-i-wont-fight-al-franken-rich-lowry

        • mancityRed6

          I grew up with Franken on SNL. I already knew I liked him, but since the book was extensively researched and with footnotes…well, he was already preaching to the choir at that point, but it did give me some more insight.
          TBH, I had a job in the mid ’90s that required driving. I can only listen to the same classic songs a thousand times so I started listening to Rush for one hot minute.
          I know, I know. I was young and stupid and couldn’t see how the decisions made in DC affected me in little old Joplin. It took a bit, but by the end of ’95 I was better. This was around the same time the OJ verdict came out.

          • Juan de Fuca

            I loved and still like Rush. Their music has a positive vibe to it. People sometimes bring in the Ayn Rand thing into it but I don’t read into the lyrics like that. Even Neil Peart said that he wasn’t anyone’s disciple.

          • mancityRed6
          • Juan de Fuca

            Tracking now. Yeah, that was Rush’s theme song back in the day, wasn’t it?

          • mancityRed6

            last time I heard it, he still uses it since he still pays for it in some way.

          • Juan de Fuca

            Yup. I used to listen to his show when I was younger. I don’t feel bad about it now because I at least know where these people are coming from and it’s a place I walked away from a long time ago.

          • mancityRed6

            one of the first comments I made online ever was after the supremes made their decision in 2000, on CNN (I think), asking if prez Cheney would now be allowed to take office. it didn’t take me long once I stopped being bored in the car.

          • mancityRed6

            I think, as far as Canadian bands go, I’ll go with April Wine, since you’ve probably never heard of 12 step failures (little known Windsor punk/hardcore band)

  • Latverian Diplomat

    This just in: Bill O’Reilly to sit for nude portrait by George W. Bush. “It’s not like either of us have any shame, or anything better to do, for that matter.” said the know-nothing blowhards.

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    Thanks Dok, for the trip down mammary lane with Billo.

  • m3bosha

    Well, I’m pretty sure Trump has been looking for a new Press Sec…

    Oh… and the best Do It Live is this one….
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ln-cBFanW9I

    • Little Doll–MOAMF

      OMFG, SNL will have a blast!

  • msanthropesmr
    • Anna Elizabeth

      Brilliant! XD

    • Jeffocaster in the desert

      words words words, blah blah blah, poetry….zzzzzzzzzzz

      • msanthropesmr

        Huh – your picture looks familiar.

        • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

          The sincerest form of flattery…

        • Jeffocaster in the desert

          just got the camera to work again. Something amiss with Windows Camera. Redownloading (IS THAT A WORD?) didn’t work.

          • msanthropesmr

            Have you tried turning it on and off?

          • Jeffocaster in the desert

            duh.

        • Jeffocaster in the desert

          Subtle difference for some say genetic reasons.

        • snark-lurker

          two sides of the same boing?

        • Doug Langley

          Okay, which one of you is evil Spock?

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨
  • Rachel Book Harlot

    And it’s not even my birthday! Squueeeee!

    https://media.giphy.com/media/FVNoYaJTVY0Ja/giphy.gif

  • not_vh
  • Michael R

    New season of this starts tonight …

    https://s8.postimg.org/ch9gd3k6t/fargo.jpg

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “I’ll miss you, Bill Just hope you don’t get replaced by Arnold Schwarzenegger like I did. What a ratings disaster that guy is. The worst. Really bad.”
    — Donald Trump

  • mancityRed6

    so it’s only partly cloudy here, and even if the trees are getting leaves, it’s still either blinding or darkish…drinking PBR and that bottled in bond whiskey again, because I have the next four days off and I only need to do four things: laundry (and a workout), some form of groceries, title the car finally, and meet my parents at Dean and Deluca (thank dog they’re paying).

    • snark-lurker

      you still haven’t met you own parents yet?

      • mancityRed6

        hey now, don’t make fun. it’s only been 43 years.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Fox News announces replacement program for O’Reilly Factor.

    “Presidential Daily Briefing with Steve Bannon”

    “I’d watch that, well the first ten minutes anyway.”
    — Donald Trump

    • jesterpunk

      Not enough pictures and too much blah blah blah and words.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        We’re losing him, quick show some more Spring Break Co-ed footage(*)

        (*) I never watched it, but my understanding is that this was a regular feature on the O’Reilly factor, this time of year, just so he could condemn it of course (wink, wink). Stephanie Miller does a whole bit about that.

    • Count Awesome

      C’mon, the whole show would just be a half hour hate filled monologue so Trump would just watch it on a loop.

    • RobKanC

      A chance to watch President Bannon on news daily. OMG!!!!

  • goonemeritus

    I’m sure he is just retiring to spend more time with his…… no that can’t be it they hate him too.

    • Vecchioivan

      More time with his ghost writers?

      • Count Awesome

        He’s going to spend more time with his rich inner life where he is a rapey knight fighting in the crusades.

    • RobKanC

      actually, it ain’t even funny. Just sad.

    • Count Awesome

      His family is already begging him to go back to work.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      He finally has time to meet with all those process servers.

    • quantum mechanic

      Now he’ll have time to figure out that whole tides conundrum.

  • guppy06

    When he deploys his golden parachute, where will he land? CNN?

    • mancityRed6

      don’t give them any ideas, look who else they’ve hired.

    • RobKanC

      MSNBC is where it is at..

      • snark-lurker

        wear is Megan Kelly?

    • Bobathonic

      I understand there’s an opening at The Blaze.

    • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

      An electric fence, made of superconductor-type votes?

  • Count Awesome

    I’m quite impressed with right wing pundits’ ability to not only put their foot in their mouth but to also, too, be able to shoot said foot at the same time is quite astounding.

  • RobKanC

    I can’t wait for his next book, “Killing BillO’s Career”

    • DainBramage

      The solution is “Mr. O’Really”, “On the Phone”, “With the Falafel.”

  • Anna Elizabeth

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aUeRegBIhd0&index=2&list=PLgA_QpnjZQyyg2xGkWCAkeBlscomEi1Fn

    I sing this to myself sometimes when I walk somewhere:

    Desmond says to Molly
    ‘Girl I like your Face’
    and Molly says this as she takes him by the hand

    • Ricky Gay

      She came in through the Overton Window….

  • marxalot

    I’m listening to upbeat folk punk songs about dying in a gutter after blowing all your chances and alienating all your friends.
    Music as catharsis- they do it so I don’t have to.

    • Hemp Dogbane

      Turn Blue.

  • azeyote

    ol’ billio snorting like a pig to get him some of that there hot chocolate is a visual mindfuck

  • PressSecretaryCaptainHowdy

    Here’s a clue to which Democrats — or “Democrats” — are badmouthing Ossoff:

    https://twitter.com/outofideas4anam/status/854751448353079296?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw&ref_url=http%3A%2F%2Fnomoremister.blogspot.com%2F2017%2F04%2Fwith-no-hillary-to-kick-around-new-york.html

    http://nomoremister.blogspot.com/2017/04/with-no-hillary-to-kick-around-new-york.html

    Remember, they WILL NOT REST in their efforts to destroy the Democratic party. Their agenda now is to lose the midterms and give Donnie a second term. Do not doubt it for a second.

  • chascates

    From that bastion of alternative reality, WND, comes a report of Billo’s thoughts:

    O’Reilly issued a statement as he returned by plane from Italy on Wednesday: “It is tremendously disheartening that we part ways due to completely unfounded claims. But that is the unfortunate reality many of us in the public eye must live with today.
    “I will always look back on my time at Fox with great pride in the unprecedented success we achieve and with my deepest gratitude to all my dedicated viewers. I wish only the best for Fox News Channel.”
    He added: “Over the past 20 years at Fox News, I have been extremely proud to launch and lead one of the most successful news programs in history, which has consistently informed and entertained millions of Americans and significantly contributed to building Fox into the dominant news network in television.”

    • Count Awesome

      Seems part of the left wing vagenda conspiracy

    • Nick Scroggs

      If only he’d added “This is a conspiracy by the pot-smoking, abortion-loving left to destroy me.”

    • “…due to completely unfounded claims.”

      Like lawsuits. Multiple. Against YOU. Which you LOST.

      That is to say, F off and die, Bill.

      With votes, of course.

  • Hemp Dogbane

    The late, great Kristin Tillotson, the not-great Tim Pawlenty & Bill-O.
    http://www.offthekuff.com/mt/archives/000600.html

  • goonemeritus

    When do we get Hannity fired?

    • jesterpunk

      That is scheduled for right after Trump is impeached and his staff is all in jail.Hannity and Chris Christie can be their maids in Guantanamo Bay.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “Coke rots your teeth, Geico insurance is over-priced, and reverse mortgages are a scam.”
      — Sean Hannity commits advertiser suicide?

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨
    • DainBramage

      So, he doesn’t believe in Fearless Leader?

    • RobKanC

      lol right.. Like the evangelicals gonna vote for a mormon from Utah..

      • PressSecretaryCaptainHowdy

        Converted Jew Mormon.

      • jesterpunk

        Egg McMuffin couldnt even get enough votes in the last election in Utah and he is a mormon. Chaffetz doesnt stand a chance.

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Yesssssssss.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Is one of the trademarks “Kompromat”?

      • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

        Sharing is caring.

    • Count Awesome

      Chaffetz look like he fell out of the ugly tree, hitting every branch on the way down, only to fall into the asshole tree and hit all those branches on his way down.

      • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

        Meanwhile, the Giving Tree has filed assault charges.

        • Count Awesome

          The tree of life in the garden of eden wants it’s fruit back.

    • PressSecretaryCaptainHowdy

      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    • msanthropesmr

      OK, so this is obvious – was one of them
      feelthechafe.com?

      • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

        You had to rub it in, didn’t you?

      • Count Awesome

        no-chafe-lube.org.

    • TJ Barke

      FFS. Well if the current malodorous conman occupying the office can win then all bets are off.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      JasonChaffetz2028.com??!! Jesus, dude. Pence won’t be done presinenting till 2032 at the earliest!

    • What? For a minute there, I thought that was your nickname for what was on top of Trump’s head.

  • Count Awesome

    Spicer may not last through April now that Bill O’Reilly is available.

  • My, my, I feel so sorry for ….

    Well I’m sure there must be someone to be sorry for in this debacle

    Not Billo, obviously
    Or his wingnut fans
    his co-workers (especially the female ones) will be pretty happy
    Pucker Carlsen will be ecstatic
    his script writers … nah they’re obnoxious too

    … I’m sure I’ll think of someone

    … eventually

    • The lawyers when Billo runs out of money to pay them?

  • Scooby

    Now who’s going to laugh at Watters World jokes?

    • LarryHoudini

      Agreed. That idiot is the worst.

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        He’s gonna land on The Five now.

    • Vecchioivan

      It’s Watters’ World; we just swim in it.

  • Nick Scroggs
  • tapp_my_wire,please

    The Franken clip was great. BillO sitting there stabbing the table with his pen and telling himself that whatever he comes back with don’t include the words, that little jew.

  • DainBramage

    I’ll just leave this here. Season 3, coming soon.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WwiVPkwY2ZE

    • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

      I started watching the first couple of episodes, but then never went back to it for some reason – although it seemed quite a fun premise.
      I ought to pick it up again…

  • Bill D. Burger
    • Msgr_MΩment

      Damnit. You ALWAYS ask for the extra wishes FIRST!!

    • Yr. Gma

      Trajectory is downward. Some days faster than others. Today was a good day.

  • jesterpunk
  • Nick Scroggs

    And of course the double standard of Bill’s when it came to Bristol Palin’s pregnancy versus I think Britney Spears’s sisters.

  • David Futrelle has a good section on this over at We Hunted the Mammoth Including some wonderfully demented tweets, for example
    https://twitter.com/Stooge_3/status/854794229696036865

    • Anna Elizabeth

      OOh, are all the worthless waste-of-blood MAGA-hatters gonna boycott Faux Noos? Circular Firing Squad, aim!

    • HazooToo

      Best thing I can take from that is, some of them will abandon Fox. Maybe if we can get more of them to shake loose, we can actually DAMAGE the damn network. Fox News is a fucking cult.

      • puredog

        I thnk you misspelled “cunt.”

    • The Flaming Carrot

      I love the articles on that site. The comment mechanism, however, sucks mammoth ass.

  • quantum mechanic

    He’s a pompous ignoramus who has led a hate fest for 20 years that has turned once sensible people into rage fueled idiots, but he doesn’t come close to Hannity in sheer stupidity and culpability. Not that that’s saying a lot.

  • bluicebank

    Great producer parody of “Do It Live”:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A4BL1_pIRew

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Thanks for that. That was aerobically therapeutic.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Fox announces O’Reilly replacement…Holographic Father Coughlin Show.

    The original Coughlin speeches can be used with just a few updates, such as changing “Mussolini has some good ideas” to “Putin has some good ideas.”

    It is expected that Fox viewers will greet this technological marvel enthusiastically.

    • RobKanC

      They will probably not watch it without some blonde women showing legs..

      • Latverian Diplomat

        Is Holographic Leni Riefenstahl available?

      • By sheer coincidence, Oily…I mean O’Reilly announced Dana Perino as a “special guest host.”

      • Too bad the movers and shakers of the Fox Empire harrassed most of them away. Not to worry though, Fox is smart enough to keep “back-up copies” (see below.)

  • Jennifer R

    Ann Coulter got bounced from Birkley.

    • Undocumented Skwerl!

      I think they should let the riot happen.

      • Jennifer R

        Contributory negligence suits are costly.

        • Undocumented Skwerl!

          This is true. But it just plays on victimization on the right.

    • Bill D. Burger
      • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

        That’s funny.

      • The Flaming Carrot

        The skank should have eaten the pie. It would have done her scrawny ass some good.

      • bluicebank

        It’s hard to hit someone that skinny with a pie. Unfortunately Soupy Sales is no longer with us.

      • “Let them eat pie!”

    • jesterpunk

      If she does show up they should just play her roast video.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zwoGrDa5g2c

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Cue the Freeze Peach handwringers.

      • jesterpunk

        She is claiming on twitter that free speech means anyone can say whatever they want and you cant stop them.

        Relevant XKCD

        https://xkcd.com/1357/

        • Undocumented Skwerl!

          Hahahahaha. Free speech don’t work that way.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          Yeah, there will still be tons of concern trolling about this though. See also, Ayaan Hirsi Ali.

        • Jennifer R

          Yeah Twitter is having a fit. Like holy shit people not every thought on the planet is equal and there is a vested interest to stop lies.

        • Left Coast Tom

          Doesn’t she remain perfectly free to show up in Berkeley anyway and start crazy-shouting in People’s Park?

          • jesterpunk

            She might need a permit or something but sure she can. Other people can also tell her to shut up too.

          • Left Coast Tom

            In People’s Park a screaming crazy person will just blend into the scenery.

    • PressSecretaryCaptainHowdy

      Can she be bounced from the planet?

    • georgiaburning

      She’s free to speak at for Berkeley for free anytime. Just stand in Sproul Plaza and start talking. What she wants is to sell tickets and put on a freak show.

  • Bill D. Burger

    Babble Spice has got to be one of the weazeliest [sic] motherfuckers on the planet. That he can stand there mumbling lie after lie and puking up mountains of bullshit is remarkable.
    “The President didn’t mislead and he wasn’t confused about the USS Vinson. Eventually it’s going to go to the North Korean area.” Goddamn! How he can say that shit with a straight face is beyond me.

    https://twitter.com/LawyerRogelio/status/854830555875209216

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “The whole earth is the North Korean area….broadly defined.”
      — Geography Spicey

      • Contemplative Ron

        From a galactic perspective they’re pretty much the same place.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      Of course it will end up in the Korean Peninsula – earth is round, isn’t it???!!! Fuck you liebruls!….

      • Latverian Diplomat

        “Spicey, you can’t piss off our flat-earther supporters with wild claims like that.”
        — Steve Bannon

    • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

      Lying, stumbling piece of shit mouthpiece.
      Fucking amateur hour. Seriously. The whole world is laughing at this administration’s bullshit.

    • not_vh

      #spicerfact

    • mancityRed6

      he knows who signs his checks and that’s all he needs to know.
      he did the same job for the House Government Reform Committee and the Republican National Committee.
      He knows how to lie in order to fund his lifestyle of not working for corporate America.

    • The Flaming Carrot

      Don’t forget Steve Bannon is in jilted advisor jail, along with Addie Bundren (sorry, I forgot the real name of the crone with the cat buttons on her suit, I just ate a bowl of turkey chili).

  • Toomush_Inferesistance

    O’ Really was really only a christian because the Irish were invaded by a new set of storytellers, those who really put down women, those goddam mouthy harlots!…

  • Chadwells
  • Msgr_MΩment

    You can’t spell “cunt” without “Bill-O Liar”.

  • Bill D. Burger

    Yes:

    [Activists Warn Fox News Advertisers That Bill O’Reilly’s Firing Was Just The Beginning
    By Jason Easley on Wed, Apr 19th, 2017 at 2:39 pm

    Activists are calling the firing of Bill O’Reilly what it really is, a victory over a serial sexual predator, but are warning that there is still a sexual harassment problem at Fox News that advertisers need to be wary of.]
    http://www.politicususa.com/2017/04/19/activists-warn-fox-news-advertisers-bill-oreillys-firing-beginning.html

  • Count Awesome

    O’Reilly has decided to travel the world now so he can yell at inferior cultures and brown people in person from the safety of a very high balcony.

  • mancityRed6
    • Bill D. Burger

      Shouldn’t be long before BillO’ joins them by moving into a room down the hall.

      • Shoto

        “Fuck it! We’re watching Wheel of Fortune live!”

        — Rageoholic Bill-O

  • Bill D. Burger

    HA HA HA HAHA HA HA HAHA HA HA HAHA HA HA HAHA HA HA HA!!
    Obama’s Patriot attendance vs Turnip’s turnout today.

    Tonight:
    RealDonaldTrump@donaldjturnip
    More Patriots players attended White House today than ever in our history. Fake news media won’t report. Dishonest. SAD

    https://twitter.com/NYTSports/status/854793140125020160

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “The ones who showed up for me were the true patriots. #MAGA”
      — Donald Trump

    • RobKanC

      Fake news. Photoshopped. The photo doesn’t have the other 2 miles full of Patriot’s players.

    • aktlib101

      FAKE NEWS.
      If you check down that Tweeter feed, they posted the REAL picture. Looks like Brady and LeBron were there too, libtard media is lying as usual https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/e3691906969276e82c43be012db6cc24f053f45c763ad3d1f874039c48e3d3af.jpg

    • Pinkham’s Law

      That top one is ‘shopped, man. I’ve seen a lot of ‘shops and I can tell by the pixels.

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    Fox News talent department meeting: “Who is qualified to fill BillO’s seat?”

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ba3f74611dceddd2b591da459f270d49791102ba80f48266384ac59d2e18789a.jpg

    • Count Awesome

      Any drunken redneck heckler from a football game in Texas is qualified.

    • Michael R

      I would be thrilled if they got what they deserved .

    • quantum mechanic

      Sweet guacamole making Jesus let it be Palin or Michele Bachmann. Even though that would put the kaibosh on a lot of SNL, Last Week Tonight and The Onion material (what comedy writer could top those savants) saving the Union would be worth it.

      • tehbaddr

        The crazy unhinged ladies of the right are the gift that keeps on giving.

  • Chadwells

    OT: New Spicer Fact….SOUTH IS NOW NORTH…PERIOD!

    “Spicer stands by Trump’s claim of armada’s presence off Korean Peninsula”

    http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/video/spicer-stands-trumps-claim-armadas-presence-off-korean-46892354

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “If the armada is not on the Korean peninsula then it must be off the Korean peninsula. This is basic preposition stuff, people.”
      — Sean Spicer

    • mackafritz

      Technically it is off. Just way, way off.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      We have always been at war with Eastasia. FACT!

    • Msgr_MΩment

      The Spanish Armada was the SECOND GREATEST ARMADA OF ALL TIME.

      After this one.

    • Rick Hill

      In other news, the Vincennes task force was suddenly called away from a long planned military exercise with Australia and is steaming at full speed northwards in order to make the lying shit that comes out to this administration less…lying. Administration officials stand by claim it has always been where they said it was

      • Msgr_MΩment

        This is bad news for the seamen. And the hookers in North Australia.

        • RobKanC

          *snicker” seamen.

      • georgiaburning

        Liberty in Hong Kong?

  • Vecchioivan

    When does he put on a blond wig and an evening gown and sing “Don’t Cry For Me, Argentina”?

    • Nick Scroggs

      Hippie socialist long hair, Peron was a great president!

    • Latverian Diplomat

      The advertisers finally struck up a chorus of “Papa Don’t Preach”.

    • Count Awesome

      He and Julie-anni could make their own version. Of “The View”.

    • HazooToo

      I actually really liked that song, but I never watched the movie, so I have no fucking clue what it’s about.

      • Vecchioivan

        It’s a movie about when Madonna was the dictator of Argentina.

        • HazooToo

          Youuuuuuu… I like you.

        • Mack N. Nietzsche

          Still a better leader than the Head Pirate.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Dudes and dudesses, tomorrow is 4-20.

    • Juan de Fuca

      It’s ganja be a good day!

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Last dance with Mary Jane
        One more time to ease the pain

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      I know, I know. Like, all the streets in downtown Denver are like, blocked off already. Obligatory “Young Ones” where Neil hits the bong.
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UQfbzOJTtbs

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Gene Genie, ftw.

    • Vecchioivan

      There will be a naked dancing in the streets in Portland. Oh wait a minute, that’s called Thursday – never mind . . .

    • Courser_Resistance

      Yup, planning to drop by my neighborhood shop tomorrow after work.

    • HazooToo

      Wonderful, ordered just in time. What does 4-20 have to do with weed tho? I mean I know it’s like a holiday for potheads, but why??

      • Jeffocaster in the desert

        Google is your friend.

        • puredog

          Google doesn’t really know.

        • HazooToo

          So are you! ^^ I’ll look it up later, I’m lazy.

          • Jeffocaster in the desert

            Origins[edit]
            A group of people in San Rafael, California,[2][3] calling themselves the Waldos[4][5] because “their chosen hang-out spot was a wall outside the school”,[6] used the term in connection with a fall 1971 plan to search for an abandoned cannabis crop that they had learned about,[4][7] based on a treasure map made by the grower.[8] The Waldos designated the Louis Pasteur statue on the grounds of San Rafael High School as their meeting place, and 4:20 p.m. as their meeting time.[6] The Waldos referred to this plan with the phrase “4:20 Louis”. Several failed attempts to find the crop eventually shortened their phrase to simply “4:20”, which ultimately evolved into a codeword that the teens used to mean marijuana-smoking in general.[7]

            Mike Edison says that Steven Hager of High Times was responsible for taking the story about the Waldos to “mind-boggling, cult-like extremes” and “suppressing” all other stories about the origin of the term.[9] Hager wrote “Stoner Smart or Stoner Stupid?” in which he called for 4:20 p.m. to be the socially accepted hour of the day to consume cannabis.[10] He attributes the early spread of the phrase to Grateful Dead followers, who were also linked to the city of San Rafael.[10]

          • HazooToo

            I just found that! It’s still confusing, but less so.

    • tehbaddr

      Time for tea, dum-de-dum-de-dum dum dum.

  • Bebecca

    O’Reilly wasn’t fired because he’s guilty of sexual harassment, he was fired because a large group of advertisers refused to advertise on his show. So Faux News did not develop a conscience.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      See, fear and greed can make you a better person.
      — Fox News

    • It doesn’t matter what your ratings are if you can’t sell commercial time. They were starting to lose money on his show, and “loss leader” isn’t something any network wants for very long.

    • Courser_Resistance

      True, but look at it this way. their holy God of the Free Market has just given them a smackdown. And it’s the ONLY thing that they care about. Being outrageous racists, bigots and serial sexual abusers may not hurt their ratings but if advertisers pull out they’re toast. No one was ever going to change their minds or ethics.

  • Bill D. Burger

    “Uhhh….Can ya’ spare a prayer ther Yer’ Eminence?”

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C9zM3_UXkAEterz.jpg

  • Bill D. Burger
    • tapp_my_wire,please

      Several ex-wives earned their combat pay, er, alimony.

  • Nick Scroggs

    So, we’re not invading North Korea? I feel relief, yet more concern about an administration saying that a fleet was there when it wasn’t. “We currently have several SOG teams ready to assassinate the leaders of the African union, just kidding!”

    • mackafritz

      He doesn’t even remember what countries he’s bombed. How is he going to keep track of a few boats?

    • guppy06

      I’m mostly concerned who the fuck uses the word “armada” (outside of the proper name of some nations’ maritime forces) in this day and age?

      • Nick Scroggs

        Why, it’s dastardly Spaniards, of course.

      • Contemplative Ron

        Rod Torfulson?

      • vivian

        Armada let that one go.

    • HazooToo

      Don’t be too relieved. He wanted them to be going to North Korea. He was just too goddamn dumb to know that’s not where they were going.

  • Nounverb911

    Trump and Orally go to the ball game….

    https://twitter.com/CillizzaCNN/status/854813085953126400

    • mancityRed6

      I paid for this seat, I’m not getting up.

    • Michael R

      No Melania to nudge him .

    • Latverian Diplomat

      I appreciate the thought, but fuck Chris “Emails” Cillizza with O’Reilly’s loofah.

    • My thought about this picture was “what fucking idiot wears a suit and tie to a ball game?”

      • Little Doll–MOAMF

        The same guy who punched his son onto the floor when he went to pick him up to watch a game and the son wasn’t wearing a damn suit.

        An abusive asshole.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        If I take the tie off, I’ll just have to tape it together tie it on again later.
        — Donald Trump

    • tapp_my_wire,please

      Who dafuq wears a tie to the ballyard? Or, who goes to the ballyard w/ BillO?

  • tapp_my_wire,please

    Donald to tweet FDR lost track of more Navy ships than he ever has.

    • Count Awesome

      Also to tweet something about a wheelchair and him being lazy.

      • RobKanC

        Also mention how he was a liberal democrat.

        • PressSecretaryCaptainHowdy

          “head clown”

      • Idiokraticdrumpfenjugend

        Also how Roosevelt was friends with Russians when they were commies!

    • Latverian Diplomat

      And he sent a destroyer to get a “dog”, I would never send a destroyer to pick up anything short of a stone cold ten…what’s that. Fala was an actual dog, and that story was bullshit? I stand by my original statement.
      — Donald Trump

      • PressSecretaryCaptainHowdy

        ohhhhh fuuuuuuck

      • Mack N. Nietzsche

        This
        Head Pirate has not been content with attacks on immigrants, or the handicapped,
        or on people who didn’t vote for him. No, not content with that, he now includes
        FDR’s little dog, Fala. Well, of course, FDR doesn’t resent attacks, and most
        people don’t resent attacks, but Fala does resent them. You know, Fala is
        Scotch, and being a Scottie, as soon as he learned that the Head Pirate’s
        fiction writers in Congress and out had concocted a story that FDR had left him
        behind on the Aleutian Islands and had sent a destroyer back to find him – at a
        cost to the taxpayers of two or three, or eight or twenty million dollars- his
        Scotch soul was furious. He has not been the same dog since. FDR was accustomed
        to hearing malicious falsehoods about himself – such as that old, worm-eaten
        chestnut that he represented himself as indispensable. But I think we have a
        right to resent, to object to libelous statements about his dog.

      • Pinkham’s Law

        Fail. Too articulate, bigly. Mkes sense, spelled right, proper English. Weak. Sad. 3/10, would not Tweet again.

  • Nounverb911

    Now we see who has the balls in this family…
    https://twitter.com/NYDailyNews/status/854830245102460928

    • Count Awesome

      His balls must be deflated.

    • HazooToo

      Is he a good person or a dick? I actively avoid sports as much as I do Trump’s voice, so I have no idea.

      • mancityRed6

        he is a really good friend of people who really like tRump. also, somewhat of a cheating bastard

      • vivian

        He has accomplished a great deal, but mysteriously has felt compelled to cheat along the way, tainting all he has done. Sad.

    • Mack N. Nietzsche

      My respect for Tom Brady just skyrocketed. (I’m a Broncos fan.)

    • mancityRed6

      it’s been reported how his mother was sick (only went to one game last season) and that might be why (or the reason if you want me to rhyme it out)

  • capnkrunch

    The best about the “how da moon get dere” clip is how in the top left it says ” Fox news educational segment”.

  • Nounverb911
  • Anna Elizabeth

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M9h_llpo4Gc

    I can sing this one with a passable accent, maybe I can go to a Baseball game in Japan someday. :)

  • BMW

    Its too bad he couldn’t take Hannity with him, but by all accounts, Hannity isn’t a skeezy perv around the women. A chauvinist, sure, but above trying to slip it to his lady co-workers.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “Nobody’s perfect…ly evil.”
      — Sean Hannity

    • vivian

      Not surprised. I always imagined him to be a pedophile.

  • Nounverb911
  • Mack N. Nietzsche

    Has Keith Olbermann made a statement?

    • Little Doll–MOAMF

      He tweeted simply “Mission accomplished.”

    • Saxo the Grammarian

      And people say that “Plan 9 From Outer Space” is the worst movie ever made.

  • Nounverb911
    • tehbaddr

      When you’re paranoid, it seems like everybody’s out to get you!

      • Contemplative Ron

        WHO TOLD YOU?

  • progressiveredneck

    His lament.
    Job lost to unfounded claims.
    Ok,
    I wonder how many people lost jobs, position, credibility and
    opportunity due to his unfounded claims masked in the morally unassailable realm of opinion journalism that never said it was news.

    • Contemplative Ron

      I read that as ‘unfounded clams.’ In my defense, I had chili for dinner.

    • Persistent Demme

      Karma IS a bitch.

  • msanthropesmr

    I was going to do some work, but then I ate chili.

    • PressSecretaryCaptainHowdy

      Whaddya mean, farting ain’t work?

      • Jeffocaster in the desert

        no wifi in the potty room.

        • PressSecretaryCaptainHowdy

          Don’t need no sissy wifi, fartin’s real man work.

  • msanthropesmr

    We eat chili to forget, my son.

    • Jeffocaster in the desert

      We eat vindaloo to forget, my son.

      • msanthropesmr

        What are we trying to forget?

        • Jeffocaster in the desert

          Hell week coming up…..I got a list. For instance do you know what 4-24 is?

          • Contemplative Ron

            -20?

        • Saxo the Grammarian

          Damned if I know. This chili is sure-fire short-term memory loss in a bowl.

        • Mack N. Nietzsche

          Why we don’t eat vindaloo.

  • Count Awesome

    “I feel your pain Bill, and I want to feel some more.”
    –Milo Yionnoppoulis

  • tehbaddr

    Fuck it! We’ll do it without the Tahini!

    • Vecchioivan

      Give me a motherfucking Turkish coffee!

      • Count Awesome

        Armenian coffee libelz!

  • A little bit of compare and contrast – Trump’s first Easter Egg Roll
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHuWAqvZ3Z4
    And Obama’s

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0hHnPctlGoU&t=3s

  • Alexander Stallwitz

    I dont want to freak anyone out, but the bunny from this year Easter Egg Roll is following me around warning me that the Tangent Universe is going to collapse in 28 days, 6 hours, 42 minutes, and 12 seconds. I think we need to be concerned about this https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/58acd9029ea677725718a3fa4bb252f13d53d9cc012bd231b371354c55d77a33.jpg

    • Michael R
    • Count Awesome

      Is the bunny telling you to burn shit?

    • Pinkham’s Law

      Does that mean we get returned to the universe in which things make sense, and Hillary is #45? I’d be ok with that.

    • PressSecretaryCaptainHowdy

      Are you the Manipulated Dead or the Manipulated Living?

      • Alexander Stallwitz

        I just hope I dont get hit by a Jet Engine

    • Little Doll–MOAMF

      BTW, just what Sesame Street character DID show up for that fiasco? I don’t remember seeing one.

      • efoveks

        Elmo drew the short straw.

        • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

          He was not tickled about it…

    • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

      You can hide from it behind the cellar door.

      • Alexander Stallwitz

        But the killer clown lives down there!

    • Nick Scroggs

      Tangent Universe? I thought that was destroyed in the New 52.

    • HogeyeGrex

      Makes me want to photoshop one of this guy’s signs into bunny’s hand
      https://www.americanhistoryusa.com/static/images/frank-chu-12-galaxies.jpg

  • mancityRed6

    this song has been on my mind lately:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33pA31c2cfs
    how soon is too soon?
    somewhat dated

  • Nounverb911

    REALLY Starbucks, this thing is real?

    https://twitter.com/TorontoStar/status/854811865716842497

    • Vecchioivan

      Unicorn is gamy, kind of like elk.

      • Nounverb911
        • Vecchioivan

          So, crappaccinos . . .

      • Count Awesome

        Tastes a little like a cross between a Pegasus and a Satyr.

        • Vecchioivan

          I’ve had hippogriff, but not Satyr.

          • msanthropesmr

            Tastes like chicken.

          • Pinkham’s Law

            Everything tastes like chicken.

          • Rasilom

            This is possibly why
            https://youtu.be/Gf-1OswoPYc

          • Pinkham’s Law

            I refuse to speculate o how that tastes, but it looks like congealed jism.

      • puredog

        On the plus side, unicorn comes with its own shishkebab skewer.

    • Pinkham’s Law

      Where’s Kiri when you really need him? F’in piker.

    • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

      75 grams of sugar!
      Fuuuuuuuuccckkkkkkkk!!!!!!

      • efoveks

        It’s a crack substitute!

    • Nick Scroggs

      OMG, you like, sneeze glitter.

    • Edith Prickly

      I saw somebody on the Faceplace talking about Starbucks unicorn jizz. It looks about as appealing as it sounds.

    • Claire

      That looks foul. It seems like something you’d drink and then feel sick for the rest of the day.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      You don’t have to be a virgin to drink it, but maybe it helps?

    • Latverian Diplomat

      No word yet on whether a Pegasus Panini is in the works.

    • Gregory Brown

      You can dress that burnt coffee bean shit up any way you want, and it’s still shit.

  • Wild Cat

    If only his publisher, Steven Rubin at Henry Holt & Co., had supplied Bill O’Reilly with endless hookers to sexually molest and verbally abuse, both good Catholic Mr. O’Reilly and the very frum Mr. Rubin would continue to rake in even more obscene amounts of money for lies, slander, and sadism.

  • Nounverb911
    • Wild Cat

      Be a shame if he didn’t have Jon “Both Sides Do It D.C. Rally” Stewart on to pimp one of his books.

      • Thiazin Red

        That annoyed me to no end. Sorry Stewart being angry about people lying and doing shitty things is not equal to lying and doing shitty things.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      IIRC, Howard Beale was assassinated live, on air.

      Just sayin’…

      • PressSecretaryCaptainHowdy

        You don’t say.

  • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance
  • Nounverb911
    • Left Coast Tom

      I’m sure Ted Cruz just needs to tour the state re-introducing himself. After all, who doesn’t respond to Cruz by wanting to punch, I mean, vote…

    • puredog

      I need the GIF equivalent of “I think I just threw up in my mouth a little” for “I think I just came in my pants a little.” God, I would love to send Ted and His Loving Daughters back to the private sector. Though my Ted Cruz Is the Zodiac Killer t-shirt would become somewhat obsolete.

  • aktlib101
  • Jennifer R

    Oh! So if you want a decent thriller/horror, check out Pontypool. Saw it some years ago and just remembered “Oh yeah that was good more people should see it.”

    • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

      Ah yes – very good!

  • Idiokraticdrumpfenjugend
  • tapp_my_wire,please

    So the armada was a little delayed. Jared was still getting fitted for his yachting cap and deck shoes.

  • Thiazin Red

    I’m glad its become more acceptable for celebrity women to just say that they don’t have kids because they don’t want kids. I’m glad my family haven’t been weird about it, because ever since I knew it was possible to be an adult and not have children, I knew that was what I was going to do

    http://nymag.com/thecut/2017/04/ina-garten-jeffrey-garten-no-children.html

    • aktlib101

      but…but…if you don’t have children, then the furriners and mooslims will migrate here and make America Brown. Again. Then what?

  • Bitter Scribe

    The first good thing to happen in 2017.

  • Mack N. Nietzsche

    Having a discussion with the roommate: is O’Really getting severance or getting paid for the rest of his contract? I’m saying no, he was let go with cause. He says that they have to pay him. Knowledge or opinion?

    • Mike

      You’d have to see the terms of the contract, entertainment deals can be filled with all kinds of crap…and what’s the cause…? Allegations…?
      Criminal acts sure..innuendo, not so sure.
      JMO

  • tehbaddr

    Didn’t he used to claim his show was “the no spin zone”? Fucking lying sycophant backasswords conservative scum bucket!

    • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

      Fucking Lying Sycophant Backasswords Conservative Scum Bucket is the name of my new korean barbecue barbershop quartet.

  • puredog

    It sounds like something of a negotiated departure, probably along the lines of “Well, Bill, we can do this easy, or we can do this rough.” To make it smooth, I suspect he is being paid out his contract, or some substantial part of it.

    • Pinkham’s Law

      But we never, EVER, do anything . . . easy.

    • Mike

      He just resigned so they prolly had to buy him out and yeah, he’ll get a boatload to play nice.

  • Nounverb911
  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Chaffetz giving up his seat in ’20, Alex Jones behaving like the psychopath we know him to be, now O’Reilly getting shitcanned. I’m trying to think of any little anomalies that happened today that might’ve been portents of this run of good luck. Which shoe did I put on first? What route did I take walking the dog? She treed a cat, but thankfully not a black cat. Did I do the Sign of the Cross before trying to start my truck, or in gratitude after it started?

    • Vecchioivan

      I’m going to keep drinking and smoking dope just to make sure the streak doesn’t end.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Makes sense to cover all the bases…just in case.

        • Shanzgood

          I’m starting to feel like I shouldn’t be here sober.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Well, I am…for now. Hoping to do something about that unfortunate condition shortly.

    • Pinkham’s Law

      You don’t have to wait till 2020! According to Wonkette he leaves in 2018.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Yes! Even better. Hopefully he’ll get senioritis before then and basically quit doing evil for the last 8 months or so of his term.

    • Penny Dreadful Says Resist

      I am optimistic by nature. November 8 has taught me to curtail that instinct but today…well, it’s getting harder to fight my nature.

    • notaten

      There was an owl on my roof this morning, which as we all know usually portends the demise of someone or something. I of course got up and crossed myself, then spit three times in the dirt, to direct the bad omen away from me and mine. Hey, I guess it worked!

  • Bitter Scribe

    From what I understand, Tucker Carlson and Sean Hannity, for all their on-air obnoxiousness, are friendly or at least cordial with their staffs. O’Reilly, OTOH, treats everyone like shit (not just young women he wants to get jiggy with).

  • OrdinaryJoe

    Lost carrier? Or was it something else? Maybe this?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J8FtxE5EQgA

    • Anna Elizabeth

      This is a fun movie, all those Hi-Viz Tomcats and Intruders. :)

  • mancityRed6

    in regards to the timeline (looking at you, Berkeley), let’s all be careful out there
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HF7e2rgzsrU

  • Mike

    My 9 year old grandson just came running in and asked me if we’re living in the Matrix … I said I hope we are or you’re gonna hate the next 70 or so years.
    His mom’s comin to yell at me now….

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    If we could just jettison the orange sexual predator (out of office, into an active voting volcano, in a rocket headed to the sun [with votes], etc.), I’d be cool with that.

    https://twitter.com/ShaunKing/status/854529867932717056

    • Left Coast Tom

      Wait, I thought Shaun King was OK with the election of Trump, given that the alternative was Clinton? Is he saying Fox “News”[sic] shouldn’t have fired O’Reilly?

      • Martini Ambassador 🍸

        Well, you know, emails…

    • Delu

      You just need to make it unprofitable for Trump to be in the Whitehouse for ANY reason and he’ll leave on his own. It’s how Trumpians work.

      Fox is an example of this. The network has been aware of O’ Rielly’s sexual misconducts for YEARS, they only decided to do something about it once enough of their subscribers decided THEY couldn’t take it anymore. It’s always the bottomline that matters most to Trumpians, find some way to affect that, and you’ll get them to willingly do anything, eating their own children, shooting their own grandparents, ANYTHING for the sake of themselves.

      But I think it’s far better to let Trump stay in the Whitehouse until 2020 for 2 reasons:

      1.) If he leaves, it’s like a middle finger to America and saying “I quit”. True it would hurt his reputation, but that’s really not of concern to him (hey he’s Trump, what else did you think). Conversely, the entire country has a chance to say decisively and with finality to him “YOU’RE FIRED!!!!” when voting him out in 2020.

      2.) Since Americans did vote for him anyway, might as well keep him. By virtue of those votes the country deserves him.

      Even if he ends up destroying it.

      • puredog

        Interesting, but. . . .nah. I’m okay with getting him out tomorrow, if we can.

    • tapp_my_wire,please

      Hey, he won. Melania assures us the erection is over.

  • Jennifer R
  • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

    I wondered what The Wanderer was up to these days:
    https://twitter.com/MillenialDog/status/854449316752220161

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    I bet everyone of us here could get arseholed, monkey-walking drunk tonight on cocktails made of nothing but one part whiskey and 3 parts wingnut tears. With just a dash of schadenfreude.

  • Blackest Noobs

    ha ha how in the fuck do you a Hard Right Douche Bag get fired from a network of hard right douche bags?

    perhaps something to do with the tides and moon, or Aunt Flo kicking your ass.

    ladies, it’s there for the taking….don’t let em push you round no more…Brillo is the first but there is so so many more of them we all gotta take down.

    bing,bing, mutherfuckin’ bing, bing.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B9kLVTPqsLg

    • Rick Hill

      Start to cost them too much money

      • WeaselPoo

        Morality and decency starts the process of common beneficial change, but it’s usually economics that determine the moment of change ( Magna Charta, US independence, Slave trade, US Civil Rights, should be some others I can;t think of right now)

  • IOnlyLikeCats

    I was trying to figure out what Jared Kushner’s face reminds me of and I’ve decided it’s like a British family whose cousins have married one too many times.

    • Wild Cat

      He’s actually ‘fresh blood’ for the inbred cult he and his moll (really fresh blood!) joined.

      • mancityRed6

        they say that, but…

        • Wild Cat

          Of all the Jewish cults to join, they joined a fucking bizarre one, believe me. And I find all religions bizarre and cultic.

          • mancityRed6

            today is my Friday night, but it’s not Jared’s. I wonder what the rest of the week will bring?

      • IOnlyLikeCats

        Fresh or not, I’d like to know how many branches his family tree has.

        • Wild Cat

          They were probably fairly inbred until a hundred years ago when they left the Jewish ghettos in Europe.

    • notaten

      It’s like the chin narrows down to a weird angle immediately below the jawbone or something. Yeah, creepy.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    The big story has legs on Yahoo News:

    We just got a huge sign that the US intelligence community believes the Trump dossier is legitimate

    The FBI reportedly used the explosive, unverified dossier detailing President Donald Trump’s alleged ties to Russia to bolster its case for a warrant that would allow it to surveil Carter Page, an early foreign-policy adviser to Trump’s campaign.

    It’s a key signal that the FBI had enough confidence in the validity of the document to work to corroborate it and present it in court.

    DRIP DRIP DRIP DRIP DRIP!

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Tucker fucking Carlson? Really? What, Geraldo wasn’t available? Has Tucker finally risen to his level of douchebro incompetence yet?

    • ariel_gee_398

      The time slot is past Geraldo’s bedtime.

    • CripesAmighty

      “The 9 O Clock Insufferable Trust Fund Sneer, sponsored by Swanson Frozen Chicken”
      Must-See TV.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        “Don’t miss The Smirk, nightly at 9 with host Bowtie Carlson.”

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω
    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      AWW!

      • Résistance Land Shark Ω

        Additional nice time for this evening … and BillO was the one washing the otters!

  • Just home from dinner with my mom. Had bacon wrapped scallops, roasted garlic brie with toasted baguette, and a super gourmet mexican thing with a masa cake and salsa verde and pico with marinated chicken

    • Pinkham’s Law

      So . . . you’re writing the recipe post this weekend?

      • We went to a resaurant we like downtown, but haven’t been to in a while.

        • Pinkham’s Law

          I guess I need to cook something tomorrow, then. *looks in freezer*

          • I can give you my cake and frosting that i made

          • Pinkham’s Law

            OH MY DOG! That looked/sounded fantastic! I hope it was at least half as good as it seemed, because THAT would be near-orgasmic!

          • I think i under did it with the chili, you can taste it, but it doesn’t have that real “kick” i wanted

          • ariel_gee_398

            I’ve made chocolate cake with stout, there are some nice chili stouts would probably make a great cake.

          • I used a chili cocoa blend, the base recepie calls for 3/4 cup of cocoa, so i put in about 1/8 cup of the blend as a substitute and about 1.5 TBSP of cinnamon. I should have gone a little heavier with the chili

          • ariel_gee_398

            The only solution is to keep making new cakes until you get it just right.

          • That is the plan

          • ariel_gee_398

            If you want to stay thematic, I suggest falafel.

          • Pinkham’s Law

            Good thought, but I’ve never made it. I try not to inflict experiments on y’alll.

          • Martini Ambassador 🍸

            Maybe something Korean in honor or our pending nuclear engagement?

          • Shanzgood

            I used to pound down kimchi when I was pregnant with my daughter and I don’t even LIKE it.

          • mancityRed6

            I am so very sorry…I was hungry, but not now.

          • Shanzgood

            Sorry….

          • mancityRed6

            oh dog, the smell… not you’re fault

          • Shanzgood

            I don’t even remember the smell. It was red so I needed to eat mountains of it. And beets.

          • mancityRed6

            arrrgh, the dad of the doggy lady that pulled me out of Joplin with a promise to go to Canada…her dad loved his beets.
            #triggered
            (she’s still a doggy lady http://www.cirnechi.com/index.html)

          • Shanzgood

            I hate beets.

          • Shanzgood

            ALso, them dogs ain’t right.

          • mancityRed6

            so I got suckered up to Michigan (Ray Township, 28 mile road), and then about 3 months in I find out we aren’t going to move to Canada, she’s going to Tennessee with her parents. As far as I know she might still have some horses, but she abandoned some other breeds along the way.

          • Shanzgood

            What a froot loop. Ugh.

          • mancityRed6

            yeah, she stopped taking her meds when we went back to Michigan. blame it on me, I never once stopped to question why she was American but could get me into Canada.

          • Martini Ambassador 🍸

            I have become a kimchi fiend in the last year. I think it’s because it’s such a radical change from typical French fare (which is lovely and delicious, but sometimes a girl needs to change it up). I always keep a few jars around for fried rice, noodle bowls, omelettes, etc. I have to make it from scratch for lack of any real Korean population around here, but it’s easy, if not exactly authentic.

          • mancityRed6

            as soon as I get off my ass and get all the spices and needed cooking stuff again, I’ll send pics of the pulled pork.
            first task, boston pork butt, bone in.

      • Also, i am working nights tomorrow and friday then getting up at the arse crack of dawn to go science March

    • Shanzgood

      Mrmph. I have a cold and no energy so I dug into a veggie tray.

    • Shanzgood

      And also because you said “bacon” and I’m feeling mopey and sorry for myself.

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/1d323438506a825b3d4ab52f2ec9b28c6c8d3c38387873db24009e7af39990ee.png

      • These scallops were amazing. Good spicy chioptle mayo thing on the side

        • Shanzgood

          I love scallops.

          • I don’t get them often, but what i have had, i have loved

          • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

            I miss bacon.

          • Shanzgood

            Me, too. *sniffle*

          • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

            We all miss bacon. I know your hurt is deeper. But you gotta be a rock now.

          • Shanzgood

            I know. I’m getting too hopeful right now and I just shouldn’t. He’s got a hearing on Tuesday and he and his lawyer are going to try to make a case for letting him go home.

          • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

            It’s okay to have hope. If you don’t have hope, he’s gonna know it and it’s gonna push him down. Stay with it.

          • Shanzgood

            I am.

      • Penny Dreadful Says Resist

        I may be up your way in three weeks – would love to hook up if there’s time. PM me or whatever it is we do around these parts. (Niece is graduating – Go Eagles. At least, it looks like an Eagle.)

        • Shanzgood

          Which way? I don’t know any teams called Eagles…

          • Penny Dreadful Says Resist

            Wichita, it’s a High School graduation. Big times!

          • Shanzgood

            There is no PM function here but you can email me at my username in my profile (not shanzgood) at yahoo dot com.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Have some Rauchbier. Tastes like bacon.

        • Shanzgood

          You know what baconz tastes like?!

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Good thoughts your way.

        • Shanzgood

          Thanks!

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Great. Now my re-heated nachos from last night aren’t sounding so good.

      • It was my birthday dinner. I do not eat like that every day. I have left overs of the brie and the mexi thing for lunch tomorrow

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          Aren’t you special! Happy Birthday!!

        • tapp_my_wire,please

          Happy, Happy. Cake?

        • Pinkham’s Law

          Hapy Birthday to you,
          Happy Birthday to you
          Happy Birthday Dear Picky,
          Happy Birthday to you!

        • House0fTheBlueLights

          Happy Happy, Wonker Pal!

        • WomanInThePersistence

          Happy birthday! You know how to celebrate!

    • tapp_my_wire,please

      Well, my PB&J dinner sammich on aged artisan bread contained some antibiotic properties. :)

      • proudgrampa

        “penicillin?”

    • proudgrampa

      Mmmmmm. Tell me more!

      Again, Happy Birthday, Pickwick!

      • Mom had this awesome pan seared halibut with roast veg and wild rice, it was amazing

        • proudgrampa

          Is this something you can order at Tim Horton’s?

          • No. It’s a local place here, called The Tasting Room.

          • proudgrampa

            Sounds wonderful!

            Hope you had a dessert with a birthday candle!

          • Msgr_MΩment

            No, but you can r-r-r-r-r-roll out the r-r-r-r-r-rim to win.

    • shivaskeeper

      You did not invite me? It’s not like I’m like 4000 miles away and in another country.

      Happy birthday.

    • tehbaddr

      Angels on horseback!

    • Contemplative Ron

      … do you think your mom would adopt me?

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      I made Hungarian comfort food tonight, largely because my Chinese MIL for some reason decided I needed 2 pounds of kielbasa. The SIL (she’s the Hungarian one) says it’s rackott krumpli, but the rest of the fam has always called it Rumpled Crumplies.

    • Doug Langley

      That is some serious food porn.

  • IOnlyLikeCats

    It turns out those pretty romantic carriages can be made electric without ruining the aesthetic or you can use a scooter instead of horses, companies are just *really* lazy.

    • IOnlyLikeCats

      Cinderella carriage (for adults) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=meyZLYvmEtY

      • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

        ME WANT!!!!!!!

        • IOnlyLikeCats

          I’ve been researching it for two years because I want to be driven to my wedding in a carriage but I refuse to harm animals.

          • Shanzgood

            Get FMC to pull it. He’s got to learn his job SOME time.

          • IOnlyLikeCats

            But if I get an electric I can learn to drive it.

          • WeaselPoo

            Hitch up some “Big Dog’ robots by Darpa/Google—problem solved.

    • WeaselPoo

      ‘Gil’ ( from the Simpsons) who has probably been working for ‘Big Buggy Whip’ for years, should probably be considering his options right now.

  • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

    Forgive me if I screenshot this from the Office of Ethics before the Trump admin forces them to take it down. pic.twitter.com/4wkxjMXLnQ— Jason Karsh (@jkarsh) April 19, 2017

    • WeaselPoo

      Holy fucking wow!

  • Just because it’s cute.
    https://youtu.be/uh4dTLJ9q9o

    • Shanzgood

      Awww!

  • Sophia

    Fox always 1 step forward 2 steps back:

    Fox News Fires Racist Bill O’Reilly, Promotes Racists Eric Bolling and Jesse Watters

    As part of Fox’s primetime lineup reshuffling, its 5 p.m. roundtable gabfest The Five will move to the 9 p.m. slot vacated by Tucker Carlson, who will take over O’Reilly’s highly coveted 8 o’clock hour. Bolling will depart The Five to get his own 5 p.m. show, starting May 1. Replacing him on The Five will be Watters, O’Reilly’s long-time protege and henchman.

    http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2017/04/19/fox-news-fires-racist-bill-o-reilly-promotes-racists-eric-bolling-and-jesse-watters.html

    • Martini Ambassador 🍸

      Barf! Well, one can’t ever accuse Fox of not pandering to the absolute worst of humanity.

    • TJ Barke

      Protoge? Henchman? I think they mean toady.

    • Wild Cat

      You were expecting someone more to your taste being hired for prime time on a neo-fascist, racist, mysogynist network?

      • Sophia

        No, luckily I don’t get Fox here.

    • OrdinaryJoe

      Glen Beck is sitting in front of his TV thinking, “I’m back.”

    • shivaskeeper

      How long any of them last will depend on how much revenue they bring in. None of them are as popular as he was so they start at a deficit there. If they bring the money back they will get to stay. If not, they will be gone/demoted in pretty short order.

  • disqus_lWwzrwNaw6

    I wonder if this is going to change the cozy relationship Bill O currently enjoys with the Nassau County police, the Archdiocese of New York (up to and including His Reactionary Eminence, Cardinal Timothy Dolan), and various eminent members of the New York State judiciary.

    Probably not, given how these things go. By their lights, the man– now a certified martyr–is still exceptionally wealthy, enough so for them to continue to smile upon him.

    Meanwhile, the Murdochs have clearly decided that, having defeated Hillary, they need to rein in the network’s misogyny a wee skosh. Mission accomplished, and all.

    But the elevation of Tucker Carlson (and also of Jesse Watters) suggests that even the younger Murdochs are all in with ol’ Rupe when it comes to white supremacy. Tucker is even more beloved by younger white nationalists than O’Reilly is by vicious old racist, woman-hating farts. Jesse, meanwhile, is a living, breathing, smirking testament to white privilege.

    • Picabo

      This is the most thoughtful post I have seen on this subject. Well done! Thanks.

    • shivaskeeper

      I doubt it had anything to do with misogyny and everything to do with losing money. Weeding out a misogynist is just a by product of cutting monetary losses.

    • dshwa

      Tim Dolan never met a misogynistic pig he didn’t like.

  • Apple Scruff

    For anyone who hasn’t seen: The New England Patriots visit the White House.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/19e5ede752157785aa7f8232001e6f8cc1aac864d2498664d42d22e78e24e7df.jpg

    Also too, Obama is going to be visiting Germany in May at the exact same time that King Orange is supposed to be there for a NATO meeting. Germans HATE Trump and LOVE Obama. What could go wrong?

    http://www.politico.com/story/2017/04/obama-germany-visit-angela-merkel-237100

    • Cripes, not even the whole team showed up for this one. In 2015, it looks like not just the team, but the executives, coaches, practice squad, injured reserve, and anyone else who happened to be in the Patriots building at the time were there.

      • Apple Scruff

        Brady didn’t even show up and he’s supposed to be Donald’s BFF. Instead, Giselle Tweeted about the climate march today! LOL

    • SeekingResistanceBarbie

      FAKE PHOTO!!! Everyone knows that more Patriots visited Trump.

      • Apple Scruff

        PERIOD!

      • OrdinaryJoe

        The rest of the team was on the disappearing aircraft carrier.,

      • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

        THE EARTH IS ROUND SO THE OTHERS WERE GOING TO GET THERE EVENTUALLY!

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Damnit! We even had an asteroid in the Earth’s vicinity!

      • notaten

        Stupid asteroid! Couldn’t even take a million mile detour to help us out of our misery! Lazy taker!

  • Bitter Scribe

    What’s going to happen to the douchebag who goes out with a camera and stalks people Billo doesn’t like? Jesse Shitters or something like that?

    • shivaskeeper

      Don’t care.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      The report is he’s gonna land a job on The Five.

    • Shoto

      I’m thinking a good old-fashioned B-52 air strike might be in order. We are talking about the execrable psychopath Jesse Watters, right?

  • Spurning Beer

    Thank Jah O’Reilly is gone. That’s one less reason for me not to watch Fox News.

    • Left Coast Tom

      Since it took a couple decades to remove this reason, when do you expect to become a Fox News[sic] viewer

      • Spurning Beer

        Let’s see. Umpteen moronic assholes, times twenty years apiece, equals… I should be on my third reincarnation by that time. And unless I’m reborn as a moronic asshole, it’s safe to say I’ll still be watching MSNBC instead.

  • OrdinaryJoe

    Billo. Archie Bunker with a college degree.

  • mancityRed6
    • OrG

      I’ve met Hank,super nice guy.

      • mancityRed6

        he looks a lot closer to his granddad than his daddy did
        also…totes jealous

        • OrG

          Sounds more like him too. When he’s doing Country that is.

  • Reximus

    Fargo (TV version) Season 3 starts tonite! Has Ewan McGregor in this one

  • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit
  • WeaselPoo

    Back in the day, I had a wordpress blog. Of all the shit O’Reilly has done IMHO the worst by far was his encouragement of the murder of Dr Tiller, followed by his denial of any culpability.
    If anyone’s interested here’s the old post link
    http://at5thestate.blogspot.com/2009/06/bill-oreilly-out-damned-advertising.html

    and this here is my subtle photoshop effort making the thematic point of my post–the original was a Ronald Reagan advertisement pitching Chesterfield cigarettes,

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/83990aa31feb70ea721ece31edfe179938140c5f2fd2c881e39d0b618538c0a9.jpg

    • Shanzgood

      That was the first I’d heard of BO so he’ll forever be associated in my mind with Dr. Tiller’s murder.

      • WeaselPoo

        Interestingly, (quote from a post of mine about Dr, Tiller, 5 days earlier than the above)

        Two years ago in Denver, Colorado, another abortion protest incident occurred in the foyer of a place of worship which also involved militant abortion opponents. In that particular case the local police responded immediately and no-one was killed.

        In the subsequent trial of the accused, the litigant’s spokeswoman asked the judge to “consider the safety of ministry employees and visitors” when handing down the sentences.

        The incident that the police so efficaciously reacted-to did not involve a confrontation between legal abortion providers and abortion opponents, but rather between two factions of the anti-abortion movement and with the aggrieved party asking for future protection from harassment and possible violence.

        WTF?!!

        After years of vandalism, fire-bombing, death threats and an assault with a deadly weapon by members of religious groups, Scott Roeder was observed by eye-witnesses and recorded on videotape in felony acts by attempting to sabotage the locks on Dr Tiller’s clinic—a federal offense under the FACE act.

        The clinic provided the local police with the evidence of Roeder’s felony and the police did absolutely nothing.

        That left Roeder free to take his anti-abortion crusade to the next level in which he “allegedly” murdered Dr Tiller in a church foyer a few days later.

        • Shanzgood

          Wow, I didn’t know someb of that about Roeder.

          • WeaselPoo

            I learn stuff at Wonkette pretty much every day—about law, science, economics, English, Geography, Religion and sex. And assholes—lots and lots about assholes. So many assholes.

          • Shanzgood

            That’s why they give us the happy nice times vids with the Wonkagenda!!

          • WeaselPoo

            They are a comfort, for sure.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    OT, but I wrote an inCREDibly snotty letter to NPR regarding their policy of not using the word “liar” in conjunction with Anusmouth McDickwart. Of course I got the typical whitebread, politely vacuous response: “Dear Punk, thank you so much for your interest and input. We at NPR value the suggestions of listeners….blah blah woof woof quack quack.” Fucking useless gits.

    • OrG

      BOTH SIDES DO IT!!

    • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit

      Well done. It might not seem so, but the more they get, the more likely they’ll eventually crack, or at least adjust position.

  • OrG

    One less lying liar on TV.

  • OrdinaryJoe

    Uh oh. EriReich Prinz is on Rachel’s radar. Another Russian dot to connect.

    • Steely_Fan

      I love watching her draw a target on these assholes, slowly, slowly, then…bang!

    • My youtube stream is somewhat behind, so i’m still on chris

    • TJ Barke

      Careful Rachel, that fascist fucker might try to have you murdered.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        WInter
        For Polonium
        And Franciium….

  • ifyalikeityashuldaputasw19onit
  • mancityRed6

    I’m stuck in a loop…send sandwiches, weed, and beer
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HcDFLfwGQGo

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Sorry. All I got is weeds, whites, and wine.

      • mancityRed6

        don’t stick to semantics, you bastard

  • Count Awesome

    In 10 years O’Reilly will claim he was on the front lines during the “war on men”.

    • Shanzgood

      Oh, PUT him there. Please!

    • shivaskeeper

      Doesn’t he already claim that for the most part?

      • Count Awesome

        He’ll find a way to make it more dramatic by fabricating some heavy armed vagina havers shooting at him.

    • mancityRed6
      • BadKitty904

        For a game of cricket?

        • Dear lord, no one should be subjected to that

        • mancityRed6

          bring the ball so we don’t get in trouble.

          • BadKitty904

            Good form, eh, wot?

          • mancityRed6

            I’m going for a century. bring me bannon.

          • BadKitty904

            You’ll be Wonkette’s own W. C. Grace!

          • mancityRed6

            Pakistan will still bring me down to size. or India, or Australia…who has the ashes now?

          • BadKitty904

            England.

            Due to our high population of immigrants from the English Caribbean, cricket is fairly popular in Florida.

          • mancityRed6

            I wish, because cricket is a little more exciting (a very much little) than baseball

          • BadKitty904

            Cricket matches are fun to attend, if only for the booze and the cute men. The game of cricket is akin to watching paint dry.

            (I love baseball, actually.)

          • mancityRed6

            so, you only like guys that dress in white, with those helmets….ok

          • BadKitty904

            Hey, *I* never said “only”…

      • mancityRed6

        as a man, I know where it hurts worst.
        jam your fingernail in between their second and third knuckles. they’ll cry

  • OrdinaryJoe
  • Picabo

    “Dairy industry warns ICE raids on farms could skyrocket milk to $8 a gallon.”
    http://www.dailykos.com/stories/2017/4/19/1654432/-Dairy-industry-warns-ICE-raids-on-farms-could-skyrocket-milk-to-8-a-gallon

    • TJ Barke

      NO! I need my bovine mammary excretions!

      • Shanzgood

        That phrasing just made me super glad to be lactose intolerant.

        • Bobathonic

          They’re even better fermented!

          • WomanInThePersistence

            Damn right!

          • Shanzgood

            The hell is THAT?!

        • TJ Barke

          I like weird verbose ways of saying ordinary things. Like this for what a nice day: There sure is minimal atmospheric interference with the local fusion reactor this exposure cycle.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      I imagine Trump will blame liberal cows for not producing enough just to spite him.

    • eggsacklywright

      That’s OK. Milk is disgusting.

      • tehbaddr

        That’s true, but I like a splash in my coffee. Milk has 1 good use! Well, that and I also use a little to choke down my morning cereal. Milk has 2 purposes in life! That and the occasional required 1/4 cup for Mac and Cheese, 3 purposes! Milk has three decent not disgusting uses.

        • 🛶🗣️ Mr Canoehead 🛶🗣️

          Also cheese, milk chocolate, butter, ice cream…

    • Courser_Resistance

      It’s unlikely they’ll be able to replace the workers at all. Which will mean the entire dairy industry will collapse. Locally at first, but it’ll spread. That so much winning, I can’t stand it.

    • Sophia

      Dairy industry seems to have a lot of problems right now but Trump will make it right

      What’s Trump’s problem with Canada’s milk?

      http://www.cbc.ca/news/business/trump-usa-canada-dairy-battle-1.4075508

      • Contemplative Ron

        He’s not getting a cut of sales?

  • canes_pugnaces
    • Count Awesome

      Trump’s plan is to put barbers back to work.

    • shivaskeeper

      Putting aside the two who are the focus of the pic, the thing that strikes me the most is not only are the ones in front not happy, none of them are. No smiles on any of them. Pathetic, sad, miserable people.

      • canes_pugnaces

        But what a puss grabbing, bundle of joy they are listening to.

      • tehbaddr

        Pretty miserable lot, considering they just took the country back.

        • shivaskeeper

          I know. They have OD’d on outrage, fear, hate, and anger for so long, they don’t know how to be happy anymore. They are still miserable even when they “win”. Since they are unable to be happy, they think the rest of us should be as miserable as them.

          There are days I think that’s the biggest problem with some of them. They don’t ever experience joy anymore, and distrust those that still can.

          • tehbaddr

            Think of how they will “progress” on their political and emotional trajectory.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      The only difference between those yahoos and the crowd at a WWE event is that the wrestling fans are smarter and have more teeth. It looks like a “People of Walmart” get together.

    • tehbaddr

      “We’re just waiting for our jerbs to come back!”

    • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

      Meth is a hell of a drug.

      • canes_pugnaces

        And what about all those opioids? A Harley, some oxy, and a Trump rally? What could be better?

    • janecita

      They all look like they have given up on all their hopes and dreams. The “I’m dead inside” look.

  • tehbaddr

    So Bill O finally got canned. In other news, I scratched my balls vigorously today. Time for some manscaping again.

    • HazooToo

      Not so fast! Cultivate those ball-scratchins. Don’t shower for a month. Get them nice and ripe. Press them into a brick. Wrap it and put a nice label on it. Send it to Billo as “Imported Cheese”.

      • tehbaddr

        “Bill, something special for you, frumunda!”

  • Nephilim

    My condolences to whoever has to spend more time with Billo.

  • Juan de Fuca

    What if North Korea replied to Pence with, “What is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?”

    https://twitter.com/OhNoSheTwitnt/status/854673814319505409

  • BelmontPublicLibrary

    You’re forgetting this one: https://youtu.be/z4uj5NZS7g8

  • notaten

    Just a general observation about fox “news”, I noticed a few weeks ago when I was having a beer in what used to be my favorite local watering hole, the news crawl at the bottom of the screen moves very slowly, like excruciatingly slow. I don’t have cable anymore so I don’t go out of my way to watch Fox, because fuck them, so maybe I just never noticed before? Is it because their audience is that slow? Am I imagining everything?

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Watching Iron Man 2. I need Mark V-style halter-and-booty shorts like the dancers at the Stark Expo.

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    I think I need to hang this sign on the wall for a while…oy… I get that I’m a good listener, but does everyone have to be putting in the middle right now? https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/99c48237e3fdd32ac0158fd689554f00dc37a9f77b2d55340db6dea70350f1d4.jpg

  • Seraph
    • I’m having chocolate cake and gingerbread tea

      • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

        Is the BEST chocolate cake, the ones we like?

        • It’s homemade chocolate chili cake with Vanilla Cinnamon Bailey’s buttercream frosting

          • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

            Dayummmm.

  • Nounverb911
  • OrdinaryJoe

    I think Rachel has it. It’s all about Rosneft and getting the sanctions lifted so they can get money and equipment to drill in the Arctic offshore oil fields. Follow the money, again.

    • Sophia

      I read somewhere today that Exxon was looking for a Russian Sanctions waiver to work with Rosneft

      • cmd resistor

        And that Tillerson drafted something to do with it.

  • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

    Hahahahaha

    Fox Executives Fear the O’Reilly Scandal Is Just Beginning https://t.co/C2jMD5S5Nm— andrew kaczynski 🤔 (@KFILE) April 20, 2017

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Too bad, so Sad, Motherfuckers. I will be satisfied when *every* male working for your little propaganda mill is living in a piss-soaked refrigerator box under an overpass, how does that sit with you?

      • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

        Damply?

  • Nounverb911
    • WeaselPoo

      That also looks like Tony Blair, and the graph fits too!

  • Nounverb911
  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot
    • Mark Harmon needs to stand behind Spicey and give him a “Gibbs Slap” eveytime Spiecy says something stupid

      • jesterpunk

        Are you trying to break Mark Harmon’s arm? He would be slapping Spicey non stop.

      • Mack N. Nietzsche

        He’d sprain his arm after day one.

    • shivaskeeper

      Mattis looks like he has aged significantly. Also too, someone like him does not misspeak in a briefing the the CinC. Spicey and DJT are lying about that.

      • cmd resistor

        Just watched the Trump FOX clip again where he was making up shit about his armada and submarines. I still cannot believe anyone EVER takes a thing that idiot says seriously.

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance
    • Delu

      Sean Spicer makes no sense.

      • Little Doll–MOAMF

        Sean Spicer and Michael Pence
        Never make a lick of sense
        They fudge and lie
        Like orange guy
        All three are super dense

        *creeps out the back way*

    • Mack N. Nietzsche

      Geeze, that’s EXACTLY what these idiots need: Leroy Jethro Gibbs slapping the backs of their heads every time they open their mouths.

    • aktlib101

      The fuckers simply want to obfuscate people and truth, in general. They are lying about everything. They want to keep all their activities secret so they can grift with impunity. That is all it is to it.

  • Nounverb911
  • Sophia

    ‘Mexican’ Judge Curiel will once again decide Trump’s fate in DREAMer deportation case

    http://www.rawstory.com/2017/04/mexican-judge-curiel-will-once-again-decide-trumps-fate-in-dreamer-deportation-case/

  • BadKitty904
  • mancityRed6

    the story that the 2nd shift supervisor told was that he played in a rough spot in Kansas City. he was outside, handing out fliers, and they told him he needed to be back inside.
    the story was he said, “I’m David Allen Coe, I’m from Dallas.”
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vAOVRkSCWmg&list=RDEM2TckHhPNOF3uzmBWp4w1WQ&index=2
    (I used to by good stuff from the 2nd shift supervisor)

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Iron Man 2. I know after TWS that we know Senator Stern’s real game, but if I had Stark’s money, I’d primary Stern’s ugly ass and install a fucking orangutan in his fucking Senate seat.

    • Delu

      “I want my bird.”

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Also, Jon Favreau is awesome. XD The look on his face when Nat takes Happy down in the ring is priceless.

  • OrdinaryJoe

    Let me be the first to extend a year end greeting to Bilge-o.

    Happy Holidays sucker.

    • mancityRed6

      may he get everything he deserves

  • aktlib101

    A good analysis on how a war with N.Korea would play out (and why it likely won’t happen)
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/what-a-war-with-north-korea-looks-like_us_58f7740ae4b0f5cf16c7bb19?42a&ncid=inblnkushpmg00000009
    “The artillery deployment north of the Demilitarized Zone facing Seoul has been in place for many years. Married to competent SAM systems and radar-guided guns, it seems to represent a formidable capability. This means that if the U.S. attacks the nukes, North Korea has the initiative to start a battle in the DMZ, posing unacceptable choices for the United States and catastrophic choices for South Korea.

    If you detect a lack of enthusiasm by the South Koreans to the idea of a U.S. airstrike on North Korean nukes, this is why. It’s not about the cost of integrating North Korea into South, although that matters. Rather, it is their fear of losing their capital. Japan, also at risk from nuclear weapons but not artillery, is much more enthusiastic about these strikes.

    North Korea might not initiate a response. But the United States doesn’t know what North Korea intends, and its intentions might change. Therefore, it must take this into account in any battle plan. I began by asking if the North Koreans are crazy. Perhaps so, but in this case they have handed the Americans a far weightier problem than simply wondering whether they have good intelligence and whether that intelligence can be trusted. With the best intelligence in the world, attacking and destroying a SAM concentration takes time, and Seoul doesn’t have time. The North Koreans know that and calculate that they have the upper hand”

    • shivaskeeper

      Those are some of the possibilities. BLUF is thst if it wants to NK could level Seoul in pretty short order with conventional artillery. We are talking casualties in the millions. As for whether any of their high tech defenses would work? It’s NK, so… maybe. But Seoul would still be leveled,

      • aktlib101

        Yes, Seoul proximity to the border makes this a stalemate. And both sides are just posturing, whether using missile launches or using the threat of sailing “armadas”.

        • shivaskeeper

          Especially if the “Armada” didn’t know it was supposed to be part of the whole thing.

  • Shibusa

    That old Inside Edition clip truly never, ever gets old.

  • mancityRed6

    aww, fuck, a coyote just came close. I heard their cry the other morning. Living her is a drag sometimes.

    • BadKitty904
    • janecita

      Where is “here?”

      • mancityRed6

        Olathe, Ks,
        https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6f753fd2d4dbad4ab2c4d6a80214f2e2b62885a3cb1412fec021a989ea721a80.png
        (find me mofos)
        there’s a walking trail out by my deck, I used to walk it home when I lived on the other side of the complex. so many times I heard owls or coyotes singing (this was at 2 AM)

        • janecita

          I saw a coyote for the first time around here (Hunterdon Co NJ) a couple of months ago. He looked like a very ugly dog, I was highly disappointed.

          • mancityRed6

            a normal sized dog for me, I’ve spent too much time at the dog park to be a good judge

    • PressSecretaryCaptainHowdy

      I saw a frog last night. I hear them in the river, but I’ve never seen one before.

      • mancityRed6

        I never paid attention until I was at the house in Lawrence and I was told those were tree frogs…that was weird.

        • BadKitty904

          See?

          • mancityRed6

            I still remember the house in Nevada that didn’t have A/C and the june bugs that would attack the screen door. I haven’t seen those in ages. Or at least not in the numbers they once had.

        • snark-lurker

          evuh heared a bull frog of a quiet night? if not, & then yuh ever do hear’em, you wont know whut it is & then, bein told, yuh wont wanna believe it

          • mancityRed6

            I used to be able to sit by the open door and hear the shitty car races in Nevada, MO. so, yeah.

          • Persistent Demme

            We could hear the Stanford Band practice (bad, but funny kids) when the windows were open.

      • BadKitty904

        They’re in the trees here and raise hell after every rain.

        • PressSecretaryCaptainHowdy

          I am from the land of coquis, also, I remember those.

          • BadKitty904

            YES! Our little coquitos and their singing!

      • snark-lurker

        frogs used to be ubiquitous hearbouts but nah noa moa, jes bout all gone now, see jus one & mosa likly that’ll it for this summuh.

    • mancityRed6

      literally, it was as close as I am to the ground right now. it looked like a cute little puppy, but it ran away.

      • PressSecretaryCaptainHowdy

        I’ve had those, there was a pack of 3 awhile back. Once one went by right on the sidewalk when I was out on my front steps.

        • mancityRed6

          I used to walk by this apartment to get to my own about 11 years ago, I remember hearing an owl hoot and coyotes crying over whatever…to be here again is an absolute trip.

    • Persistent Demme

      So cool!

      • mancityRed6

        I whistled, but it didn’t seem to like me.

  • WeaselPoo

    Probably someone said something similar already, but in case they didn’t ( because there’s so much that can be said)

    Christmas just isn’t going to be the same without him!

    Bonus: What is the reaction from the ‘Paris Business Review’ and the ‘Polkbody’ Awards Committee? Anyone know?

  • WeaselPoo

    Oh Oh Ohhhh!! Also at risk of being redundant:

    O’Reilly comes in, O’Reilly goes out. You can’t explain that!

  • Up In Smoke O’hontas

    Lizzie, I fight like a girl too! Persist!

  • Bill would offer the usual “Going to spend time with my family” press release but unfortunately they hate his guts too.

  • Sophia

    RARE Trump Coin Is Your Chance To Own A Piece Of History YOU Helped Make – Making America Great Again!

    UPDATE
    Limited Time Special Offer

    As of Thursday, April 20th 2017 you can still get your piece of American history that you helped make happen for ONLY $14.95! That’s 50% OFF the original price!

    This genuine collectible won’t be around much longer, so don’t wait ’til it’s too late!

    Plus, it makes the perfect gift for friends, family and all your fellow patriots!

    https://mydailydiscovery.com/spo/rare-trump-coin-is-your-chance-to-own-a-piece-of-history-you-helped-make-making-america-great-again/

    • vivian

      How much for your special collection STDs? ‘Cause I’d rather have those than your shitty medallion.

      • Sophia

        Not even 100 days in and they’re half price. Another 100 days and maybe they’ll pay you to take it.

        • vivian

          Oh! It IS you! Sorry. Thought you’d been thefted by Lori and turned into a Trump spambot. Whew!

          • Sophia

            LOL! My special collection STD’s are very ‘spensive.

    • Juan de Fuca

      I don’t even wanna think about how that coin check ends in a bar…

    • Me The People

      Worth 1/1000th of it’s weight in shame.

  • PressSecretaryCaptainHowdy

    In Idaho it is legal to murder your children. Literally.
    http://www.latimes.com/nation/la-na-idaho-children-20170418-story.html

    • janecita

      That’s so fucked up! If the name of that sect was “The followers of Allah,” instead of “The followers of Christ,” this law would have been changed a long time ago!

    • Juan de Fuca

      Sevy has become the public face of the Followers of Christ, in part because of his relationship to Idaho state Sen. Patti Anne Lodge, who represents Sevy’s district. Sevy’s band served as the musical entertainment for one of Lodge’s fundraisers last year, and she has emerged as one of the strongest voices opposing changes to the faith-healing law. She is not a member of the church.

      Idaho state Sen. Patti Anne Lodge has been a strong opponent to changes to the faith-healing law.

      “These are good people,” Lodge said. “They have a right to live as the law allows them without interference, that is what our Constitution [grants] them.”

      I’ve never heard of Sen. Patti Anne Lodge before and without even Googling her name, I’ll throw down five bucks that says she’s anti-choice.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Yet still illegal for me to beat them with a stick when they throw their fucking candy wrappers in my lawn. WTF, Idaho?

  • BadKitty904
  • Nick Scroggs
  • diogenez

    Billo could open a Falafel stand….

  • Up In Smoke O’hontas

    I’ve missed yall these last few weeks (new job and learnin’ ain’t easy, new routine, yada yada…) anyway, happy Pickwick’s birthday to everyone! It is also Lizzie Warren on RMS Day, and we must all have cake in accordance with Dodo tradition. Also too, cake.

    • Every day is someone’s birthday.
      Therefore, every day is good for cake.

      • Up In Smoke O’hontas

        Cake for breakfast, because you’re god damn right. With bacon.

  • Nick Scroggs

    Did I post this elsewhere? I f I did, then here it is again. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SPFQxXxDv6k

  • Sophia

    Sean Spicer can’t name a single legislative accomplishment for Trump’s first 100 days

    Spicer failed spectacularly, offering an excuse right out of the — “We’re not done yet,” he said — and finally citing just one bill, which was actually sponsored by a Democrat:

    http://shareblue.com/sean-spicer-cant-name-a-single-legislative-accomplishment-for-trumps-first-100-days/

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      “The country isn’t bathed in radioactive fire. That’s an accomplishment!”

    • TundraGrifter

      What pending bill does President Richard Nixon fear the most?

      The one from Robert Hall.

      What pending bill does President Trump fear the most?

      Well, it could be the one from his attorneys defending him from all those lawsuits. But he probably just won’t pay it.

    • BadKitty904

      Perhaps that’s ’cause there hasn’t been a single legislative accomplishment in Trump’s first 100 days.

      • msanthropesmr

        Particularly if you don’t know what legislative means.

        • UncleTravelingMatt

          Or “accomplishment.”

    • Count Awesome

      Spicer would deny knowing his own name if it would benefit Trump.

    • Left Coast Tom

      Legislative accomplishment…legislative flatulence…it’s so confusing.

      • Count Awesome

        I believe they have legislative contsipation but suffer from verbal diarea.

    • msanthropesmr

      You hold all three branches of government.
      And you can’t pass a bill that you’ve been promising to pass for 7 years.

      That’s incompetence, friends.

      • Ωbjectifier

        They could fuck up a wet dream

        They couldn’t get laid at a women’s prison with a fistful of pardons.

        They couldn’t hit water if they fell out of a fuckin boat!

      • WeaselPoo

        Are you sure? Because it could be a plan…believe me… you’ll be sick of how tremendous a plan it will be…as soon as the audit is done!

    • aktlib101

      What Republican legislative accomplishment can anyone find (in the last 40-50 years) that has benefited the people of this country, not the wealthy donors?

    • Ωbjectifier

      “We’re not done yet,”

      True. You got 10 more days Bunny Spice.

      • Sophia

        I love that name “Bunny Spice”. Will be stolen

    • Who knew presidenting could be this complicated?

  • Idiokraticdrumpfenjugend
    • Nick Scroggs