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President Trump issued his all new and improved Muslim ban on March 6, to take effect just after midnight on March 16. And, just as with the original version, suits challenging it were immediately filed. On March 15, both the federal courts in Hawaii and Maryland ordered a halt to the ban before it could take effect. So, for the last couple of days, pundits have been jawing about whether the court orders were correct and what fate the ban would meet in the Supreme Court. Commentators are split on the first question, but everyone seems pretty sure about the second. Every one that I saw declared that if this case gets to the Supreme Court, the vote would be 4-4, but if Judge Gorsuch is confirmed by then, the president’s ban would be upheld, 5-4.

I am not that sure about the Supreme Court. So many people assume that you can predict what judges will do based on the president who appointed them. Did you notice how many media reports about the recent court orders listed who put the deciding judges on the bench? That connection between politics and jurisprudence may exist in many cases. For example, we pretty much know how the various members of the federal bench would decide a case dealing with abortion. But this case is different: it is a face off between the executive and judicial branches. And the federal bench can get pretty feisty when its power is questioned.

Before the Supreme Court would even get to the merits of the case, however, there is a procedural hurdle facing the plaintiffs: standing. To have standing when you’re challenging governmental action, (1) you have to have an injury, (2) the injury has to be traceable to the governmental action, and (3) the relief you’re asking for must cure your injury. In both the Hawaii and Maryland cases, the courts spent about half of their opinions talking about standing.

I think there’s a good case for it. Just take Hawaii. The state alleged two injuries. The first was for its university, which is an arm of the state. Because of the ban, a number of students have not been able to enroll this semester, costing tuition dollars. There are also faculty who have been prevented from traveling for conferences, and scholars from the six banned nations are not able to come to the school. The injury to the state is clearly traceable to the ban, and enjoining the ban would cure the problem. The second injury is to Hawaii’s biggest industry: tourism. The state presented evidence that since the first ban went into effect, tourism is down. That is fairly traceable to the ban, and again, enjoining the ban would cure the problem.

Even if the case for standing weren’t solid, the Court has ignored the requirement in at least one important case. In Bush v. Gore, then-candidate Bush complained that the differences in the Florida recount from county to county violated the rights of Florida voters. He was not suing claiming he had suffered an injury: He had no right to be president (in more ways than one). The Court never even mentioned his lack of standing, though, and instead just forged ahead with the decision on the merits. So, there is at least precedent that in a very important case, the Court was not so nice about the standing requirement.

Let’s assume the Supreme Court concludes that plaintiffs have standing to sue. Is the president a slam-dunk to win? I say no. I wouldn’t put money on the outcome. The main issue decided in both cases is whether the president’s ban violates the Establishment Clause of the First Amendment. That’s the clause that forbids the government from setting up a national religion. The ban on “establishing” has long been held to include a ban on favoring one religion over another. But a big fight is going to be over how much scrutiny the Court can give to the president’s action.

The government’s attorneys argue that the federal courts are limited to reading the text of the ban to see if it is facially neutral about religion. Everyone agrees that it is. Thus, according to the defendants, the ban is valid. The courts are not permitted to inquire further. The president’s action thus remains largely unreviewable.

Plaintiffs argue that in an Establishment Clause case, the federal courts are permitted to look beyond the plain text to find evidence of intent to discriminate against a religion. Both the Maryland and Hawaii courts found ample evidence from the comments of Donald Trump and his claque, both before the election and after, even up to the moment of signing, to show that the basis for the executive order was an animus toward Muslims.

Many of the pundits commenting on this finding proclaim that the Court can’t look to what candidate Trump said. It’s just campaign puffery! But there is precedent for looking to what was said in a campaign. In the case of Alabama supreme court justice Roy Moore, the Ten Commandments guy, the eleventh circuit reviewed his campaign promises to find that his actions after being elected violated the First Amendment.

The key here that makes me unable to predict what the Supreme Court would do with this case is that the president’s position is that his actions are unreviewable. Back in the day when George W. Bush was president, he set up military tribunals to try the guys in Guantanamo. The hearings were virtually unreviewable by the federal courts; the president had the last say on the prisoner’s guilt or innocence. The federal courts were limited to making sure procedure was followed. In a series of cases, the Supreme Court ruled that this scheme was not legal. Court watchers who expected the Republican justices to side with the Republican president were astonished. But it was a case of the Court saying, “You cannot take away our power to review your actions.”

As I said, I don’t know what the Court would do in the current case. But a win for the president is not a slam dunk.

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  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    What about the precedent of jiggery–pokery on the part of POTUS? Or this that a dead subject now?

    • Beowoof14

      Well this president speaks with a lot of Argle-Bargle so that could influence the outcome.

      • A Bashful Nobody

        Argle-Bargle libelz!!!!

      • OddMan

        Jiggery–Pokery vs Argle-Bargle
        Real March madness.

    • Mr. Blobfish

      It’s pure applesauce.

  • Michael R
  • Bill D. Burger

    If pastor Gorsuch is seated before it get to the SCOTUS, there is no doubt as to the outcome.

    http://www.mcclatchy-wires.com/incoming/gnjww/picture139353813/ALTERNATES/FREE_640/Supreme_Court_Neil_Gorsuch_42353.jpg

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      This is missing Mary Brigid’s point–that even WITH Gorsuch there’s reason to think that there would STILL be 5 (or more) votes saying “nope” can’t ban Muslims and this is a Muslim ban.

      • Bill D. Burger

        I understand her point, but count me as skeptical.

        • Skeptical is good, but I think the point that the court isn’t about to do anything that lessens their own role in the three pronged government is a valid one. Mostly because if they set that precedent on this, they will have to continue it and diminish their own power.
          Judges don’t like doing that, being judges.

  • Nightcrawler

    SCROTUS = So Called Ruler of the United States

    • willi0000000

      so . . . his minions should be called “scrotes” ?

  • Nick Scroggs

    Pf course, some of the House Freedom Caucus could decide that the Supreme Court should be abolished and introduce a bill on it. In the name of protecting the Constitution and Freedom from leftists, of course.

    • TJ Barke

      It’s incredibly disgusting how true that likely is.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Can’t do it with a bill. Would have to be a constitutional amendment. They could, however, just refuse to either ever allow Democratic nominees, or worse, to just stop filling vacancies altogether, like they did to, I think, the Fifth Circuit.

      • Nick Scroggs

        Wasn’t there something about possibility of a new constitutional convention with all the Republican states in control? I know I heard that somewhere.

        • Villago Delenda Est

          I think the threshold is 3/4 of the states calling for a Constitutional Convention. The problem with such a beast, of course, is that the last time this was done, the entire existing Constitution (the Articles of Confederation) was shitcanned in favor of what we’ve got now.

          There are no rules. Everything is on the table.

          • Undocumented Skwerl!

            I can see it now:

            We the White People and Our Guns of the United States of ‘Merica, in Order to Shit on the Poor Even More…

          • CogitoErgoBibo

            We the CHRISTIAN White People…

          • Nothing fucking Christian about em

          • CogitoErgoBibo

            I always find it ironic that those who are the quickest to slap a “Christian” label on themselves are the least likely to offer help or show empathy for the lesser able among us.

          • Yep, they think people won’t call them out because it is not very nice to tell people they are not really acting Christian.
            I have decided that Jesus said the hypocrites were the worst, so it is ok to call people out for not acting Christian.
            I can cherry pick too

          • Lord Jim

            “Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs, which on the outside look beautiful, but inside they are full of the bones of the dead and of all kinds of filth. So you also on the outside look righteous to others, but inside you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness.” – Matthew 23:27-8

          • Nick Scroggs

            So should we scheme to make enough money instead to buy things like agricultural tech, water-saving stuff, books and back issues of magazines, etc?

          • House0fTheBlueLights

            This is why regaining control of State leges and govs is so important. They’re only 5 states away from being able to do this, and there is a bill in the House right now calling for a CC.

  • MeerkatsRMammals

    The thing that worries me about SCOTUS hearing the case against SCROTUS is our lady crush, the Notorious RBG. Trump will demand that she recuse herself due to her previous comments (re: moving to NZ if he won…just like the rest of us wanted/still want to do). If Scalia’s seat is filled by then, her not being allowed to vote could further complicate things :(

    • A Bashful Nobody

      I doubt RBG would recuse herself. Even if Gorsuch gets confirmed I don’t see the decision as a slam-dunk for Trump. Kennedy or Roberts could easily side with the liberals on this one.

      • ariel_gee_398

        Kennedy seems to really care about how the Court, and US law, is viewed in the world. Bush v. Gore certainly is an exception, since that really damaged the Court’s reputation, but I’m not sure I see him making that same mistake twice.

    • Me not sure

      Being Supreme means that SCOTUS justices get to decide for themselves whether to recuse or not. There is no authority that can make them do so. Justice Thomas, in particular, because of his wife’s conservative activism, should have recused himself numerous times. I don’t think a comment made in jest that referred to no particular case is problematic.

  • Trump promised, many times during his campaign, to ban Muslim immigrants. He has bragged multiple times since his inauguration that this ban was “keeping his promises”. Dots like those are easy to connect…

    • CogitoErgoBibo

      If they choose to look beyond the mere wording of the ban to intent. That’s part of the problem. I’d like to think that it’s a no-brainer to consider intent, but it might not be (even though the lower courts have done so).

  • FlownΩver

    We can pre-analyze all we like, but we’d better be prepared for SCOTUS – with or without Gorsuch – to get this horribly, horribly wrong. Sixty-some years after Korematsu we all know how awful it was, but at the time six Justices went along with race-based internment of citizens.

    • Nick Scroggs

      And near-unanimous on Buck V Bell back in the 1920s.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      The key thing is at the time. Attitudes on “race” were different then. We’ve advanced in our thinking, well, for the most part, especially among those who are educated (with of course occasional exceptions). The fact that Donald talks about a “Muslim ban” was a key element in the ruling in Hawaii; those defending the EO couldn’t get it to pass the smell test, mainly because the EO is made up of Donald’s own shit.

    • cmd resistor

      Also based on fake evidence

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    morning folks! Slept in till 9:30, effing glorious.
    So is Mary Five Dollar Feminist?
    Nice to meet you!

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    also too, I finally donated to Wonkette! It was only $5, but ALL the accounts are over the balance, so until I get that taken care of, the $5 is all I can part with.

    I was SO pleased to see an email from ‘Trix this morning, then I remembered that’s the one that goes out to everybody who donates. Still, it was very nice.

  • Panika MCD

    I thought in Bush v. Gore, Shrub’s argument for standing was that he was being denied his right to due process because the recount kept going well after the deadlines for county clerks to certify the results and may have pushed it past the dead line for the FL SOS to certify the statewide results…?

  • lucidamente

    I think we’re missing the real point here: what does commenter “pds the christian view” think about this?

    • Not sure, should we ask?

      • lucidamente

        One post provides the minimum daily requirement of crazy.

        • Is this someone here at wonkette?

          • Shanzgood

            Troll on previous thread.

          • ohhhh. Missed it

          • SeekingResistanceBarbie

            We had fun with it!

          • lucidamente

            Go to the previous post. Unless the banhammer has come down, there’s some serious derp.

      • Résistance Land Shark Ω

        But don’t stop; pursue your enemies! Attack them from the rear and don’t let them reach their cities, for the LORD your God has given them into your hand.”

        — Joshua 10:19

        • That is not jeasusy though so…..

          • Résistance Land Shark Ω

            Matthew 5:43-48 – Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy.

          • snork

          • Résistance Land Shark Ω

            Of course, the rest of the verse is all that hippy-dippy love-in stuff that real Christians ignore ….

  • LarryHoudini

    We’ll, even if SCOTUS rules against it, I have to agree with patriot, Constitution lover and squirrel stew lover Mike Huckabee: just ignore the fuck out of it like Andrew Jackson did with the Trail of Tears.
    https://sustainableatlantaga.com/2015/04/02/remembering-the-time-andrew-jackson-decided-to-ignore-the-supreme-court-in-the-name-of-georgias-right-to-cherokee-land/
    Maybe if Trump doesn’t end up in jail they’ll put him on the fifty dollar bill!

    • LarryHoudini
      • Someone might wanna remind Hucksterbe that this lead to the mass deportation and deaths of the Cherokee? Like right on his twitter? Like:

        SSSoooo former govenor Hucksterbee, you are ok with Jackson having deported Cherokee people and letting them die, huh?

        • ariel_gee_398

          Probably yes, he’s fine with that.

          • snark-lurker

            as is his base

        • suziq

          I am going to guess that his answer would be yes. I don’t think those Cherokee types were Christians were they? Hmmmmm? Everyone knows Jesus gave the US of A to the Christians to be Christian without all those people hassling them.

          • Actually, they were. They adopted farming, Euro clothing, Christianity, even slave owning, all in an attempt to convince the pale faces to let them stay in their homes.

          • suziq

            What? I can’t believe I did not know that! Of course that makes it even worse. Well, fuck them all.

          • They tried really hard to live by the white man laws, both written and unwritten.
            True fact: Oprah is descended from slaves owned by Cherokee and is Cherokee herself.

          • puredog

            You mean Pocahontas Winfrey?

          • suziq

            I know a lot of the native people were way too nice to the white people that came and brought disease and pushed them off their land etc. If they would have known what was coming they could have made immigration laws to keep out all those European foreigners. Well, can’t change history but you can always make up New Rules for all the suckers who weren’t smart enough to be born in the USA. Or something I guess.

          • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

            They even translated the Bibble to Cherokee. Did not help.

      • suziq

        Yup-go ahead and do it Donald! I vet SCOTUS would love that!

      • ariel_gee_398

        These people make me feel the need for new expletives. The existing ones don’t have sufficient venom.

        • (Major_Major_Major)ly_Pissed

          We need an infusion of Dutch, Swedish, and Finnish swear words.

          • I think we’ve already taken the good ones.

    • Panika MCD

      they’ll never get rid of America’s favorite drunk and the $50 would be “too poor” for Tsarina Short Fingers to handle!

    • Leliel

      Problem: Andrew Jackson was popular.

      More likely the next story is the mass charging of ICE with contempt of court and forced resignations.

    • CogitoErgoBibo

      I’m still convinced that Donnie is merely waiting for all the stars to align in such a way as to allow him to declare martial law. Piss off the world. Cause blowback. Terrorist event on American soil. Martial law. Pretty straight line. This step is part of the “piss off the world” goal.

    • puredog

      Three-dollar bill moar better.

  • boredcatlady

    This is some damn good law ‘splainin. I smoke a lot of pot and I not only got to the end of the article, with the stereo on, but I actually understand the overall landscape. Cool! Wonkette, serving the interests of politically minded stoners since…?

    • Panika MCD

      put that on a shirt!

      • Me not sure

        Then put ON some pants. Decorum!

        • vivian

          oops. Is that a New Rule?

          • boredcatlady

            Yeah, when did we vote on that??!

          • Shanzgood

            Nooooo! Say it’s not so!

          • boredcatlady

            Why is Wonkette doing Benghazi to my pants?

          • Lord Jim

            INPEACH!

          • Good_Gawd_Yall

            We voted against it, but the goddamn Electoral College reversed the vote.

          • boredcatlady

            Jill fucking Stein. I swear to god

        • Panika MCD

          what are pants?

          • boredcatlady

            In Russia, pants wear you

          • Me not sure

            Heavy breathing?

    • SnarkON

      Pass that joint over here, please.

      • OddMan

        Pass that AbsoluteXtracts vape pen full of Silver Goo Diesel vape oil. (65% THC).
        I love modern technology.

        • boredcatlady

          I wasn’t worried about getting caught with weed if they were searching bags at the D.C. march, I just didn’t want to lose my Pax!

        • HolidayinCambodia

          My dispensary said the THC oil is 100% THC. The hash was only 53.7%, but, holy shit, I like being able to feel my limbs.

          • puredog

            But what you want is someone else feeling your limbs.

          • boredcatlady

            I’ve never tried vape oil…I am veeeery interested

        • SnarkON

          Does it smell like cherry, or fruit cocktail? Every time someone walks down the street vaping it smells like one of those horrible air fresheners in a cab.

          • OddMan

            I don’t use it out in public very often, but it has very little smell. This one smells faintly of very good hash.

  • Panika MCD

    they’re not going to limit their power because it would create a precedent that they can’t review the actions of other presidents and what if we vote in some Emma Goldman character next? however, this doesn’t rule out what they did in Bush v. Gore where they said the case’s findings could not be applied to any future cases largely seen to be “get your act together FL! butterfly ballots should have never been a thing!”

    • TJ Barke

      Emma Goldman libel!

      • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

        We would be much better off if zombie Emma Goldman was president.

        • TJ Barke

          Dead EG is better than live Trump.

    • Nick Scroggs

      Emma Goldman? They’d rather have people like her and 60s hippies shot. Edit, and hanged and such, basically anyone not quite as “devoted” as the Tea Party.

      • Panika MCD

        exactly–if they ruled too broadly in Tsarina Tic Tacs’ favor, they risk not being able to review the actions of such an extreme leftist.

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    I get the notion of injury to a state, by way of injuring people. But what about the people themselves as the injured parties? Is that a case for ACLU?

    • As a general rule, yes, they would have standing, and the odds are that the ACLU would be taking the case.

    • Standing definition. “Basically, a plaintiff must have suffered some direct or substantial
      injury or be likely to suffer such an injury if a particular wrong is
      not redressed. A defendant must be the party responsible for
      perpetrating the alleged legal wrong.”
      There’s also several other factors, like redressability, or “can the court make it better?” Almost all the birther lawsuits were chucked out because of a lack of standing. The plaintiffs couldn’t show a personal injury, and even if they had, the courts can’t change a decision of the Electoral College. That’s up to Congress through the impeachment section.

    • vivian

      Injured parties? I’ve been to a few of those.

  • Royal Ugly Dude

    Great article! Needz moar dick jokes, though.

    • (Major_Major_Major)ly_Pissed

      These serious articles are strictly BYODJ.

      • snark-lurker

        i figured that out all by myself (BYODJ)

        • puredog

          I need to bring my own DJ? I thought Wonkette provided the soundtrack!

    • snark-lurker

      and sideboob! too

  • Shanzgood

    Isn’t there also the matter of the effect of the law? I seem to remember some abortion restrictions being struck down as unconstitutional not because they were an actual direct ban but because implementing them would effectively ACT as one and that’s why they were declared unconstitutional in the end. So even if this EO somehow scoots around being an ACTUAL Muslim ban, won’t it have the same effect? If it doesn’t, what was the point of signing it in the first place?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Donald thinks he can issue decrees no matter what the Constitution says.

      • SnarkON

        He has no idea what it says, anyway, since he is an ignoramus who can’t read.

      • SterWonk

        He can issue decrees all he wants. Having them legally carried out is an entirely different matter.

    • I honestly think the entire point of signing it was to “look tough” and make his followers happy that he was stopping the scary browns in some way.

      • Shanzgood

        I thought about that, too. But Hawaii and Maryland seem to think it’s working as intended. So.

      • Sister the Resister

        Plus the added “benefit” of his will being thwarted by us pansy-ass libruls. Good fundraising potential in that, unfortunately.

    • Alan

      It’s called a disparate impact in anti-discrimination law. Even if you don’t explicitly state that a particular group is the target it is still considered discriminatory if one group is disproportionately impacted.

      • Shanzgood

        Thanks! I knew the concept was there but didn’t know what it was called.

    • ariel_gee_398

      Yes, the impact of the EO can be considered, though you’d need some time to collect data on the actual impact of the EO. Showing a law is discriminatory on its face is a quicker way to challenge it.
      I’m sure that advocates are getting ready to make that showing down the line, if needed.

  • Relativicus

    If it comes down to presidential authority, I think it’s narrowly overturned. If intent is considered, my guess is a split. And if the wildcard is in play — Trump’s targeting of judges and the justices’ (just Roberts, probably?) opinion of it — they may uphold.

    In summary, after thorough consideration of all the facts and angles, I believe one of the three possible outcomes will happen.

    • SterWonk

      Or they could not grant certiorari, since AFAIK the current state for all of the various suits is against the ban. Therefore, there is no disagreement, and no need for SCOTUS to get involved at all.

      • puredog

        Well, a split between the circuits is only ONE grounds for granting cert. “Major big fucking deal” (paraphrased) is another. See U.S.S.C. Rule 10(c):
        http://supreme.findlaw.com/supreme_court/rules/part3.html

      • Relativicus

        I expect the grant, though. Especially since the administration believes they made the proper changes, and a good part of the injunctions has to do with administration intent.

  • Scrofula

    You’re not psychic? What the hell are we paying you for?

    • CogitoErgoBibo

      Dick jokes and recipes. Duh.

      • natoslug

        Just as long as we don’t consolidate the two and start posting dick recipes.

        • SterWonk

          “Salted Rat Dicks” doesn’t count as a recipe?

          • natoslug

            Salted Rat Dicks are more of a condiment around here.

        • Sister the Resister

          There’s probably a market for that, but this is a very loving dick-joke emporium, in which we will never find a recipe for Penis ala Pinkham, or Cheddar Dong Burgers, etc. etc.

  • Villago Delenda Est

    Oh, and Mary Brigid seems to be a new freelance contributor to Yr Wonkette, and I on behalf of me myself and I bid her welcome and thank her for a well written, thought provoking (because there are no non-comments about it) article!

    • Shanzgood

      Seconded!

    • Scrofula

      TBH, we could use more legal analysis. These things seem to get down to where the semicolon goes, at the supreme level.

      • vivian

        A literary colonoscopy?

        • therblig

          or what putin puts in trumpy’s colon

          • vivian

            Putin on the Ritz?

      • Villago Delenda Est

        You read about the $10 million missing Oxford comma?

        • CogitoErgoBibo

          LOL Just posted that. Great minds.

          • Scrofula

            No–I honestly hadn’t hear of that; which is hilarious, moreso than legal decisions, grammar, and, the MLA handbook.
            (OK, I’m trying, just pretend that was funny.)

          • snark-lurker

            Oh-ha-ha-ha-ho!!! : )

          • Scrofula

            Thank you! I DO crack myself up.

          • CogitoErgoBibo

            Commas are the one thing I never touch in editing laws. That decision perfectly illustrates why. Editing isn’t allowed to change the effect of a law. Comma placement can. The legislature just has to live with those mistakes and address it in later legislation.

          • vivian

            So the legislature, as misplaced colons, misplace colons and have to misplace more to rectify their mistakes. That’s bad comma!

          • Scrofula

            I was trying to remember the details, but I think the insurance policy on the WTC holds the record; does the policy include each tower individually, or separately? That’s a billion dollar comma there.

      • CogitoErgoBibo

        Or where the comma goes. I edit laws for a living, so this was big in my profession nationwide, yesterday. https://qz.com/932004/the-oxford-comma-a-maine-court-settled-the-grammar-debate-over-serial-commas-with-a-ruling-on-overtime-pay-for-dairy-truck-drivers/

      • No need for legal analysis. President Trump has full authority granted by the Constitution to ban any foreigners however he sees fit

        The judges are acting illegally with the support of Muslim Obama & the Clinton cartels.

        • Sister the Resister

          Welcome, stranger! I doubt you will find support for your skewed interpretation here, but thanks for participating in our little discussion.

          • puredog

            Strange, stranger, strangest, Trump toady. It’s a continuum.

        • Scrofula

          I’m sure after two hours someone pointed out that you could actually read the article above, the part that explains why you’re wrong.

        • disqus_WLwbht8CyK

          Or the judges are asserting their own power. Even if you don’t agree, only trump supporters think that every politician and judge is more interested in following Obama/Clinton who have no power right now, instead of trying to advance their careers through aggressive resistance to trump. They don’t teach that at the political science university you pretend you went to?

          • I went to Western Kentucky University. You can STOP STALKING ME

          • disqus_WLwbht8CyK

            But you’re such a fascinating study of the human condition

          • Little Lulu Ω

            How about naming those Nobel laureates you correspond with? Put up or shut up.

    • boredcatlady

      I absolutely agree! She words good.

  • (Major_Major_Major)ly_Pissed

    MBMcM, always a pleasure to read your pieces. I personally hope SCOTUS will gavel SCROTUS in the scrote, but I appreciate the complexity of the issue. Tanks

    • Rick Hill

      Meh. She wrote too many words. Just tell us what to say so we get more Soros bucks, is what I wasy

      • (Major_Major_Major)ly_Pissed

        More Soros bucks? Jackwagon still hasn’t sent me the first one.

  • Nick Scroggs

    An old Olaf Stapledon or two, from the 30s yet: Militarists also were strongly opposed to the new invention; for in the
    cheap and efficient production of illusory sexual embraces they saw a
    danger even more serious than contraception. The supply of cannon-fodder
    would decline.

    In this world, as in our own, nearly all the chief means of production,
    nearly all the land, mines, factories, railways, ships, were controlled
    for private profit by a small minority of the population. These
    privileged individuals were able to force the masses to work for them on
    pain of starvation. The tragic farce inherent in such a system was
    already approaching. The owners directed the energy of the workers
    increasingly toward the production of more means of production rather
    than to the fulfilment of the needs of individual life. For machinery
    might bring profit to the owners; bread would not. With the increasing
    competition of machine with machine, profits declined, and therefore
    wages, and therefore effective demand for goods. Marketless products
    were destroyed, though bellies were unfed and backs unclad.
    Unemployment, disorder, and stern repression increased as the economic
    system disintegrated. A familiar story!

  • Tj McGee Wright

    Seems like a big consideration is how will Trump’s SCOTUS nominee play out? Will the Dems block it outright? Would the GOP dare to remove the fillibuster? ……..Thoughts?

    • They will try, yes, and we are doomed.

      • Tj McGee Wright

        McConnell has shown huge reluctance to remove the fillibuster, and several others in the party have said they’d vote against it. Question of whether they could get the votes to get the votes!

        • They will remove it the second it is convenient for them, and put it back in right before 18 just in case they suddenly are no longer in the majority.
          Bank on that.

  • cmd resistor

    I agree a big question is whether the president’s actions are reviewable at all. Hw shouldn’t be able to say, because i say so nyah nyah nyah.

    • Sister the Resister

      Ah, yes, the nyah nyah nyah argument. *sigh* I can’t believe we have a petulant spoiled child for a president, but there it is.

      • cmd resistor

        I know the president gets a ton of discretion but to act like all they have to do is say they have discretion, fuck you, is ridiculous. All those judges who ruled against him were begging for some kind of evidence from him. In the Japanese internment case, at least they presented SOMETHING (although it later turned out to be fake evidence, amazingly!). As to the petulant spoiled child, that’s so depressing. So many things he does I recognize from my kid’s childhood, which he managed to grow out of.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    Sadly, it appears Gorsuch is a fan of fucking with brown folks legally.

    https://twitter.com/AriBerman/status/842749358403665920

    • Surprise there. He is an acolyte of Scalia after all.

      • Biff52

        I have never seen TV ads for a SCOTUS nominee before Gorsuch, and I’m old as fuck.

        • Zippy W Pinhead

          Amazing, ain’t it? Thanks SCOTUS and Citizens United.

        • mt2099

          I don’t remember ads in favor of a nominee, but I remember ads against Bork.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I’m holding on to the idea that Kennedy and Thomas can’t live forever and are too self-serving to step down.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      His mother was head of the EPA during the shitty grade Z movie star malassstration, doing pretty much what Scott Pruitt is doing now…working to destroy it from within.

    • ariel_gee_398

      Good. The more controversial he seems, the less likely any movement on his nomination. Congressional Republicans can’t fight a war on 4 fronts.

  • Alan

    The so called experts are all ignoring the fact that there must be a rational basis for the order.

    • The so called experts just want a horse race. Same as it ever was.

      • Alan

        That’s what law has devolved to. No wonder people hate lawyers.

    • vivian

      Can you imagine the SCOTUS trying to define what constitutes a “rational basis” in the current climate?

      • vivian

        (self-reply) Is rationality, like sanity, a consensual attribution?

        [edit: *asking for a friend*]

      • Alan

        On the other hand, maybe irrational has become so painfully obvious that they have no choice.

  • bookish

    What options exist for US to engage North Korea?

    http://nbcnews.to/2nkiOxQ

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      I’m guessing Kim is an old-fashioned gal who prefers would-be suitors on their knees with a diamond ring.

      Before putting them up against the wall.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      The first thing you do is not pay attention to North Korea’s annual conniption fit over Team Spirit.

      • Lord Jim

        The second thing you do is let China handle it. They have no more to gain from a potential nuclear war than anyone else.

  • Michael R
    • Tiny kaiju

      How has this woman not implode into a pile of jelly yet?

      • Sister the Resister

        How has this woman not implode into a pile of jelly mayonnaise yet?

        FIFY

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      What a complete load of horse shit.

    • MizzMazz

      And someone needs to explain to KaC that ‘Slippery Slope’ arguments are generally full of shit.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      These people need votes so bad.

    • Martini Ambassador

      You know, she’s a fine one to get all high and mighty about proper use of the English language.

      • vivian

        or even proper use of condiments.

    • Yr. Gma

      To be fair, mayonnaise is more slippery than mustard.

      • Lord Jim

        Good to know. For, uh, purely gastronomic purposes. Definitely.

        • Querolous

          Mazola works better than Mayonnaise.

    • Lord Jim

      Interesting that her initial example has immigrants as menial workers struggling to make us a proper sammich. Know what an H1B visa is, you smug, vile harpy? And why we need them so badly? I note as well that no one is, as of yet, appointed to the position of ATC. It’s funny that fucking white people are so terrified of racial quotas. Projection. All. The. Time.

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      “I served moose with Sarah Palin, I knew Sarah Palin, Sarah Palin was a human salad spinner of mine. Bitch, you’re no Sarah Palin.”

    • gene108

      How exactly do we fly to non-English speaking countries and not crash all over the place, big league?

      It’s a mystery, wrapped in an enigma, swaddled in a conundrum.

      • Shoto

        Slathered with mayo instead of mustard.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        interestingly, I believe every ATC in the world has to have english speaking controllers. I may be wrong on that, but I think I read it on the pilot’s blog.

        • RobespierreHoo

          English is international, universal language of ATC. KAC wants it implemented at delis and fast food restaurants. Executive Order coming Monday.

    • Alan

      I didn’t realize she had been hatched in 2007.

  • Tiny kaiju

    OT if allowed. From Professional Left podcast regarding Sean Spicer.” It is entertaining to watch a man set fire to his career in front of you eyes.”

    • Michael R

      “I have never lied … because if you lose the respect and
      trust of the press corps, you’ve got nothing. ” Sean Spicer

      • Villago Delenda Est

        And nothing is all you’ll have when you leave, Sphincter.

      • gene108

        Spider does not lie. It is the facts the Fake News media wants to use that are wrong.

    • Jennifer R

      Every day deadbeat donnie sets Spicer’s dick on fire and every day I laugh as Spicehead punches himself in the balls to try to put it out.

    • Alan

      I almost felt sorry for him until he told that woman that America was great for letting her live here (she was born here). Now I know he’s a dick like the rest and he deserves to rot in hell. After he passes of natural causes, of course.

  • bookish

    https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2017-03-18/g-20-drops-anti-protectionist-pledge-as-trump-stance-goes-global
    Finance chiefs of the world’s largest economies set aside a pledge to avoid protectionism and signed up to a fudged statement on trade instead, in response to the Trump administration’s call to rethink the global order for commerce.

    Group of 20 nations said in a communique on Saturday that they are “working to strengthen the contribution of trade to our economies.” While the U.S. didn’t get all it wanted — such as a explicit pledge to ensure trade is fair — that’s a much pared-down formulation compared with the group’s statement last year, and omits a promise to “avoid all forms of protectionism.”

    In two days of meetings in the German town of Baden-Baden, the argument by U.S. Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin, in his first appearance at an international forum in the role, reflects claims by President Donald Trump that his nation has had a bad deal from the current global trade setup. That attitude pitched him against most other delegates, who favored a multilateral, rules-based system as embodied in the World Trade Organization.

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/economy/new-rifts-emerge-as-trump-rejects-free-trade-statement-at-g20-meeting/2017/03/18/aa69b1a2-0bf3-11e7-a15f-a58d4a988474_story.html

    • vivian

      Looks like things are going from Baden Baden to worse… or maybe wurst.

      • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

        They’re going to need more Cologne.

        • (Major_Major_Major)ly_Pissed

          Did Frankfurt again?

          • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

            I would never Essen with him.

        • Villago Delenda Est

          That side trip to Limburg was not so great an idea after all.

          • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

            Potsdam those Limburgers.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      “Ensure trade is fair” does not mean “Donald gets all the marbles” which is why there is some disagreement among the G20. For Donald, “fair” means he gets to fuck over everyone.

      • MizzMazz

        Donald uses the words fair and unfair like a toddler. “Whaaa, that’s not fair! That’s so unfair!” Guess what, kid, life is not fair. There are things you can have, and things you can’t, so suck it up. Most people learn that before they hit double digits. Donnie never will.

        • Sister the Resister

          Your post makes me miss #44 more than usual :(

          • MizzMazz

            Me too. Obama never threw a tantrum. Such a class act.

  • Finnabar87

    Time after time, political parties try and stack the courts to be facorable to their politics.

    But it rarely works out the way they want it to; for every Clarence Thomas there are like 5 David Souters.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      We have seen Justice Roberts vote to uphold the rule of law in cases where his partisan leanings would normally have made his vote obvious. The example I use is the ACA rulings … Roberts has been very aware of the law with his votes.

      Makes this a toss as Ms.McManamon has stated.

  • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

    So what does this mean?

    Part 4 of Q&A. A protester asked "how do we get Trump out" @SenFeinstein responds: "I think he is going to get himself out." pic.twitter.com/VJ9TK0K0cF— Javier Panzar (@jpanzar) March 17, 2017

    • bookish

      It’s a throwaway line, unless the legislature is willing to act.

    • Chadwells

      Ya know…I read an article about reporters seeing Feinstein come out of that intel briefing on Dampnut/Russia ties and they said she absolutely looked ashen and bewildered. Not much was made of it but I took note. I think she knows just how fucked he is.

      • gene108

        I hope you are right.

        • Chadwells

          Probably being too optimistic…

      • Good_Gawd_Yall

        I saw that too. The writer said she looked like she did when she was mayor of SF and was coming out to announce that Harvey Milk had been murdered. I hope that what her face was telling us this time is that what Putin has on Dolt 45 is so bad he can’t get out of it – not some stupid little pee-hooker tape. I’m sure none of his supporters care about that and many of the Reptile congresscritters have done far worse with hookers! I’m assuming video of him murdering somebody or openly taking money from a proven member of a Russian mob.

        • Chadwells

          And combine that with the how she is saying the above…she knows something!!! Sweet baby jeebus I hope it’s something that will put him in jail for life like that Intel dude assured us!!!

      • VirginiaLady

        She was prolly shocked to see how many others are in the spider’s web with him. Yeah, it’s that big and that bad. Drink.

    • vivian

      Sadly only that Senators are as capable of magical thinking as the rest of us.

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        That’s what I was afraid of.

    • Chyron HR

      “Young man I’ve made more stands in my lifetime than you are old by far.”

      But tomorrow morning I will be sober and you will still be DiFi.

      • zerosumgame0005

        better and smarter then you ever could dream to be you mean?

    • Panika MCD

      he’s going to invoke the 25th at some point.

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        WTF are they waiting for?

        • Panika MCD

          him to become bored.

        • Alan

          They’re timing it in the hope that they get something out of this before it implodes.

    • SayItWithWookies

      Anyone who thinks Assmouth is going to be so shamed he’ll voluntarily resign the presidency hasn’t been paying attention to him over the last four decades. If he doesn’t leave a few fingernails in the White House doorjamb I’m a monkey’s uncle.

      • Sister the Resister

        I suspect she doesn’t mean he’ll politely step down after careful reflection on his thoughts and deeds, but rather that his deeds will sink him in the (hopefully short) end.

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        Narcissists never admit they’re wrong.

  • bookish

    http://www.cnbc.com/2017/03/18/gop-health-plan-would-hit-state-budgets-hard-moodys.html

    A GOP-proposal to shift health-care costs to the states has many governors worried that the plan would create a financial squeeze on their budgets.

    Now, municipal bondholders can share those concerns.

    The Republican-proposed bill to replace Obamacare would hurt the credit ratings for U.S. states, according to Moody’s Investors Service, because it would shift a greater share of the cost of Medicaid to the states.

    That could raise borrowing costs for states and lower the value of bonds already held by investors.

    • gene108

      Trump, i.e. The Federal government wins, and losers who could do no bettter politically than being puny loser governors, and not bigly winning Presidents like Trump, lose like the losing losers they are to the bigly winner President, big league.

      • Panika MCD

        well, they don’t exactly win. the policies have to be implemented at the state level, but there’d probably a multi-state lawsuit–even a bipartisan one!

    • Shoto
      • Good_Gawd_Yall

        Well, duh.

        • puredog

          Maybe a leaked tape will show up on the Fappening 2.0.

      • IOnlyLikeCats

        This is such a commonly held opinion I am forced to adopt it.

        • Lord Jim

          People are saying…

    • Panika MCD

      we knew this even before Moody’s spoke up. but it’s always nice to have their word when they’re on our side.

  • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

    Seeing Gorsuch strike down Dumpy’s dumbstupid Muslim Ban 2.0 and the resulting Tweeter tantrums would be amaaaziiiing, just saying.

    On that note HERE’S A CUTE LITTLE PONY.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/f15032121edac52b5e0dc1d93a4b2ff2345551cfff324e82607322cbd6cac938.png

  • zerosumgame0005

    I say (as if I counted!) his actions are reviewable, however I also recommend a toilet be handy (for the classy and YOOOGE vomitorium needed for anyone looking at him or Prez Bannon) and a lot of therapy for anyone who has to view his actions!

    • Panika MCD

      generally with appeals, you don’t go. your lawyers go on your behalf. most appeals are handled in written briefs only, but SCOTUS usually hears oral arguments.

    • Panika MCD

      they will probably have to watch Cohen try to make words with his mouth, though. it’d make a great drinking game to take a shot every time he goes, “SAYS WHO?!”

  • bookish

    Turns out it’s the same reason we are drawn to traditionally cute puppies and bunnies: Big eyes, large heads, and soft bodies are infantile qualities that trigger adult humans’ instinct to nurture and protect, experts say. Austrian ethologist Konrad Lorenz coined this behavior as “baby schema.” (Read more why we find pandas and other animals so cute.)

    Ugly-cute icons (at least according to our informal poll) include sleepy-looking sloths, doe-eyed tarsiers, deep-sea blobfish, squishy-looking desert rain frogs, and round-eyed jumping spiders. (See “You Call That Cute? Here Are 10 Surprisingly Cute Critters.”)

    These animals’ baby-like traits make us think they’re “in need of our companionship or care,” which causes “the rush of warm emotion that is the cuteness response,” says Joshua Dale, professor of foreign languages and literature at Tokyo Gakugei University and editor of The Aesthetics and Effects of Cuteness.

    • Panika MCD

      but who will think of the babby snakes?!

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6joOVjEemh4

    • Shanzgood

      CUTENESS OVERLOAD

      Babbys holding hands. One of them is my cousin’s.

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7e73d728c02552cfb941b78e094f28c72843c63ea84a6885eecccdde2e71b8f6.jpg

      • SayItWithWookies

        Those aren’t babies — that’s George Will and Tucker Carlson — they just look like babies.

        • Shanzgood

          Hey, that’s my fambly there! You can’t tell in this picture but we suspect that the one in the green bow tie is shaping up to be another ginger!

          • Shucky Ducky

            I can see it in his eyes…there’s ginger in his future.

          • Shanzgood

            (They’re both girls!)

          • Shucky Ducky

            And dapper little ladies at that!

        • Sister the Resister

          They are far too adorable! George and Tucker (and their moms) WISH they were ever that adorable!

  • mancityRed6

    OT: taxes done, extra paperwork for the Mazda title filled out. Now it’s just me and the cats again.
    You know how you can feel a sneeze coming? How sometimes there’s just a tickle and you wish it would quit or you could sneeze and get it all over with?
    I’m like that now, but with crying. I just don’t know if I want to start or not and I kinda wish I would just to get it out of me but the water’s boiling and I’m gonna make some coffee and see what happens.

    • Ms.MLG on Maui

      I do know that feeling. Sometimes listening to music helps me start to cry and get it all out.

    • snark-lurker

      it ain’t over till it’s & this ain’t over.
      never let’em see you sweat,
      never let’em see yuh cry.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Nostalgia for a better future generally works for me.

      https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4NjssV8UuVA

      • mancityRed6

        where have I heard this before?
        “The Chicago Blackhawks of the NHL have used it as part of a pre-game video introduction of the team before it takes to the ice since moving into the United Center in 1994.”
        Thanks, wikipedia.

        • Carpe Vagenda

          The planetarium sky show at the Museum of Natural History also used it, and there was an electronic version on an Emerson Lake and Palmer album that got a fair amount of AOR play.

          • mancityRed6

            I also wanted to watch a Star Trek movie for some reason.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            IDIC

    • Zyxomma

      Pro tip: Coffee is better made with water just shy of boiling.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    Looks like there’s going to be a different cast of characters in 2020.

    https://twitter.com/thehill/status/843166393184980993

    • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

      HAHAHAHA! Yes!!

      • puredog

        But does that bill purport to apply to persons who have declared their 2020 candidacy in the past? (e.g., Donnie). And if it does, may it?

        • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

          I really, really hope so.

        • Liberoid Ron

          Doesn’t sound like anything will be grandfathered – the wording says that if he didn’t release his taxes, his name wouldn’t be on the ballot in NJ at all.
          Also mentions that other states are looking at this.

  • IOnlyLikeCats

    If I had a time machine I would go 100 years in the future to yell at people who try to defend Donnie the way some people (bigots) defend Andrew Jackson and one or two other presidents.

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg

    I just want Robyn.

    • Alan

      There is that.

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        HA!

  • bookish

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trump-business-probe-new-york-eric-schneiderman_us_58caefc7e4b00705db4d8d37

    An ethics watchdog group has stepped up its campaign that calls on New York’s attorney general to investigate whether President Donald Trump’s business practices are violating the law.

    The nonprofit group Free Speech for People sent a letter Friday to Attorney General Eric Schneiderman, who indicated last month that his office is discussing concerns about Trump and his business holdings.

    It’s part of a continued push from different fronts for an examination of Trump’s potential conflicts of interest as both president and business owner, and concerns about the emoluments clause of the Constitution, which prohibits a federal officer holder from accepting funds from foreign entities.

    A letter last month from Free Speech for People pointed out past illegal activities involving the president’s businesses, and called on Schneiderman to revoke a business charter that allows the Trump Organization to operate in New York.

    The latest letter highlights additional concerns to Schneiderman that dealings by the Trump Organization in Baku, Azerbaijan, “may have violated the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act” and U.S. sanctions against Iran, according to a draft provided to The Huffington Post.

  • Rachel Book Harlot

    This is terrible. Some asshole sent Kurt Eichenwald a seizure-inducing tweet.

    “A Maryland man was arrested Friday on a cyberstalking charge in connection with allegedly sending an epilepsy sufferer an animated Twitter message telling the victim that “you deserve a seizure,” federal officials said.

    The victim has been identified as a Newsweek writer who is a critic of President Trump.

    Newsweek said the victim was Kurt Eichenwald, a senior writer. The Justice Department said that after viewing the strobe image, the victim “immediately suffered a seizure.”

    Eichenwald has written for Newsweek about having epilepsy.”

    “Md. Man accused of sending seizure-inducing tweet to Newsweek writer who has epilepsy” https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/public-safety/md-man-arrested-in-alleged-cyber-attack-on-trump-critic/2017/03/18/0ebde176-0b8d-11e7-a15f-a58d4a988474_story.html?hpid=hp_hp-top-table-main_mdseizure-1230am%3Ahomepage%2Fstory&utm_term=.41e7815de089

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      I believe that’s the 2nd time, no?

      • Carpe Vagenda

        No, same one, they just caught the guy.

        • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

          ah, I thought one of those was a copycat. Thanks.

          • puredog

            I believe this is the self-same FBI who can’t be bothered with online harassment/threats/revenge porn vs. women. Glad to see they have *some* standards.

        • Sister the Resister

          Oh good – glad it’s not a second time, and glad they caught the fucker

        • Good_Gawd_Yall

          No, it’s a second one; the guy they just caught got the idea from the first guy.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            It’s the one his wife and children witnessed that he took to the FBI. While it had happened before that early in the campaign, he hadn’t taken action on it.

          • Jennifer R

            The man named in the article, Rivello, is the guy who was arrested for sending the seizure 3 months ago.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      It is awful. It’s also awful that Eichenwald dismissed GamerGate as Milo’s “important” thoughts on PC.

      • Jennifer R

        Especially because Milo only glommed on to gamergate because he saw a group of women hating 18-29 year old men 13-18 year old boys he could creep on.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    After a hard day of profiting illegally from my father’s office, using the Secret Service as personal muscle and chauffeurs for my kids, and generally behaving like an ignorant thug, I like retweeting nazis and klansmen and killing animals which have been drugged and staked out for me.

    Oh, and sitting on stumps in flannel.

    Because it’s good to remember who they are at the New York Times.

    https://twitter.com/NYTStyles/status/843077804140969989

    • Scrofula

      A “chill” Trump in his native habitat, Mirkwood.

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        good call. I thought those woods looked a little creepy.

        • puredog

          The woods are creepy, dark and deep,
          But I have promises to keep.

    • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

      I’d like to go hunting with Donald Jr. I’d give him a ten minute head start…

      • Villago Delenda Est

        If he keeps that shirt on, I’d give him an extra five.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        with votes, of course.

        • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

          “Oh yeah, with votes…*fingers crossed*… of course!”

          • Carpe Vagenda

            Secret Service, dude. Don’t be low-hanging fruit.

            Me I wish him the dire fate of ending his life at an advanced old age in the company of people who truly admire and respect his father. And reporters for the NYT propping him up because he suits the Sulzburger family’s neoconservative monomania about the middle east and they despise the rest of us more don’t count. Except @maggienyt and Eric Lichtblau and David Brooks and Maureen Dowd. He can have those. That’s sort of my wish for them. It’ll be the classiest clique in the trailer park.

          • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

            Lol, appreciate the concern, but I suspect the SS has bigger things on their plate right now than an obviously facetious comment on a mommy blog.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            I have friends who spent two years getting out from under a nuisance libel suit based on an internet comment. I’m a little gunshy.

      • Liberoid Ron

        Tell him he has a ten-minute head start. Then start chasing him after 30 seconds.

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    speaking of law, I may have gotten a little carried away on a homework assignment for class where the hypothetical defendant’s attorney wants to see all of the expert witness’ stuff:

    3. Any and all tangible things, documents, digital files, emails, reports, records, research, articles, memoranda, notes, photos, videos, drawings, diagrams, calculations, data, or other written, digital, or tangible materials or records concerning, referencing, incorporating or otherwise related to experiments, tests, models, diagrams, and reconstructions the expert has planned, undertaken, executed, or completed while forming his/her opinion(s) in this case, including summaries, notes, or reports prepared for themselves or at Plaintiff’s direction concerning the materials sought in this paragraph.

    That’s just one of 8 (they’re not all quite that crazy). In a rational world, it would say, “Production Compelled: All your stuff.”

    • Scrofula

      I see you used a serial comma there; that could save you $10mil.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        heh, always. (Sent that article on the appeals case re: a serial comma this week to my sr. paralegal.)

        • The Witch of Endor

          So, maybe this is where I can ask my completely ignorant question of: What the fuck is up with the Oxford comma and how does it differ from the regular comma that the rest of us rubes grew to know and love? I know it has to do with Legalling but that’s pretty much all I know, and I find myself surprisingly curious about the whole thing.

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            somebody posted a funny the other day as an example:

            Oxford: “We invited strippers, Hitler, and Stalin.
            No Oxford: “We invited strippers, Hitler and Stalin. (Then there was a drawing of Hitler and Stalin dressed as strippers.)

            Also too, this:

            “An Oxford comma changed this court case completely”

            http://www.cnn.com/2017/03/15/health/oxford-comma-maine-court-case-trnd/index.html

          • Sister the Resister

            TX has a couple of great examples of the use and non-use of the Oxford comma, which basically is a comma which clarifies things. My favorite example:
            http://img.pandawhale.com/54074-Lets-eat-grandma-ZobM.jpeg

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            Essentially, IMHO, it comes down to interpreting a sentence’s meaning – which is of course what law is about, but probably also relevant in science, medicine, tech, etc. If you insert the comma, your reader knows each of the individual elements are independent of each other. If you leave it out just before an “and” or “or”, there’s now vagueness about whether the words on either side are a single clause or individual ones.

          • Alan
          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            yep, that’s the one.

    • Alan

      Add “considered” in line 5 after “expert has….” Can’t be too thorough when dealing with someone else’s lawyer.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        aye, great suggestion! Thank you.

  • Panika MCD

    OT – my Pink Dome agenda for Mon and Tues just came in.

    Monday is TX Sen. State Affairs – making guns easier to get, attacking local unions, trying to fix the state retirement systems

    Tuesday is TX Sen. Ed. – Educational Savings Accounts–a rather stupid form of school choice because it’s most directly “choice if you’re rich, no school if you’re poors” AAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL DAAAAAAAAAAY!

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      how goes the bathroom bill? immigration bill? The perennial proposed law schools?

      I’ve just been too busy to follow the news.

      • Panika MCD

        bathroom bill (SB6): over in the house where they’ll probably let it die by leaving it pending in committee.

        “sanctuary cities ban” (SB4): had the hearing in the House last week. Geren added some amendments which would only allow for LEOs to ask for papers if they’ve actually arrested someone. they’ve said they still want to look at it some more and they’ll probably gut as many things on the floor as possible. this would leave it to the conference committee which could get…dicey? yeah, that’s the word. conference committees only have public hearings if they’re going to invite people to testify. they’re usually just the chairs of the two committees coming to an agreement and getting the other four members of their committee appointed to the CC to sign a paper saying they agree.

        are you asking about the UT – RGV project?

        • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

          no, the other one
          can’t out myself, ; )

          • Panika MCD

            what other one? we just did the last of Sen Fi for SB1, they cut everyone’s “special items” by 6-10%.

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            ah, there’s another proposed law school AND a proposed online law school HQ’d at UT Austin’s law school.

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            P.S. I like the latter idea, I think that would be a fair compromise.

          • Panika MCD

            that’s within their own budget. UT – Austin is prioritizing its big research programs because they return a significant amount of money that can be used on other things. but they also control the PUF and get 2/3rds of what’s appropriated to the AUF from the PUF. so I would watch what Chancellor McRaven is saying about the subject.

  • azeyote

    i doubt if having standing means anything to Trumps minions who spend their time on their knees –

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    Okay, so I’ve been having some thoughts (IKR? Weird) about Dolt 45 I thought I’d share with you like-minded imaginary friends:
    1) I’m pretty sure that a huge part of his development was arrested at about age 6. He’s pretty much incapable of reason, which rules out development beyond age 7, which is when reasoning becomes possible; he’s also given to whining, expecting the world to go his way, throwing tantrums in public when it doesn’t, and preferring play over work. He over-uses words like “fair” and “unfair” when what he means is “I didn’t get what I want” or “Someone else won unexpectedly.”
    2) I’m not entirely ready to believe that he will be impeached – but I am encouraged by the number of Republicans who seem to finally be waking up to the very real possibility that they will lose the best jobs any of them will ever have if they continue to buck their constituents and support him.
    3) Given that his regime is riddled with Russian sympathizers, if not with outright committers of treason, and that this could potentially lead to his impeachment and/or removal via the 25th amendment, he should not be allowed to make any appointments to anything, including nominees for the Supreme Court. Gorsuch’s nomination should be yanked on the grounds that a president who is down to one year or less on his term can’t make Supreme Court nominations. IOW, use the Reptiles’ argument against them. We shouldn’t be stuck with a SC justice who could potentially serve for decades who was appointed by a “president” who served only a few months in office.
    I’m sorry this isn’t funny. I’m losing my sense of humor about this giant jerk-baby and the enablers in Congress.

    • Jeff Ackerman

      Maybe I’m being captain obvious here. I think you’re right on arrested development, he is willfully ignorant too. He doesn’t read very well or much at all, he is and has been poorly informed. His decisions and actions show it. His fathers money enabled him to be a spoiled entitled brat, he will never outgrow it. He is successful only because he inherited wealth. Without dads money he would struggle to fit in anywhere he went. Look at him objectively, his personality and mannerisms wouldn’t let him hold a job very long. The speeches he has given to his supporters consist of 80 to 100 words and phrases. Television gave him the skills he needed to enter politics. His willful ignorance made him gravitate to the alt.right wingnuts. The sad part of all this is the people that voted for him. As a nation we have failed to educate them. Critical thinking skills are necessary to be able so seperate fact from fiction in politics. There are far too many people that cannot and do not want to sort all of it out. Too many people believe the political party of their choice is right and everyone else is wrong. They want a messiah to lead them out of the dark, and into the land of milk and honey. A paternal figure to take care of things for them is what they need. Trump gets through to them and tells them what they want to hear, they are dumbfounded that others don’t agree with them about Trump. I think this is going to go on for a long long time. Like a friend of mine pointed out so eloquently, “this is like wiping your ass with a hula hoop, same old shit keeps coming around.” Another was fond of saying “there is no fucking hope!” I think they were right. We can’t give up, there is no alternative but to keep fighting.

      • Sister the Resister

        Hear Hear!

      • Liberoid Ron

        I think repairing the damage is going to take a very long time, and I think that prevention is going to take even longer. Donnie’s power grab puts a spotlight on some very real flaws that MUST be addressed, if the country is to survive at all. The US is too big and too powerful to be run by haters and thieves and psychopaths and ignoramuses. And to be blunt, if you lot don’t fix that the rest of us might get fed up and prevent it the hard way, for the safety of the other 7.2 billion of us. Though the fallout from THAT (possibly literally) would be almost as awful to deal with.

        Damn, I am way too pessimistic this evening. Maybe my blood sugar’s off.

        • Jeff Ackerman

          We all share the same frustration and despair. Too much of our government depends on the honor system, people doing the right things. The people elected that are in the majority have no honor. We know that we need to change that. The million dollar question (besides what’s for dinner?)” is how do we prevent this from happening again?
          Willem Van Loon wrote The History of Mankind. In the book he made a statement that I took to heart, “every generation must fight the good fight anew, or perish like the sluggish animals that once roamed the earth.” The struggle is going to be perpetual, people don’t learn from history.
          Thereau stated, “the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.” I think this is true of the people that voted for Trump. They want someone to fix things for them, terrorism, jobs, crime, whatever the issue. How do we educate them? how do we remove the despair they feel? It’s going to be an uphill slog through sand, every. fucking. day.
          We were spoiled with President Obama. He did the right things most of the time. Now we have a fight on our hands. There are a lot of good people that feel the same way. A lot of them are on both sides of the aisle in Congress, State, and local governments.

          You are not alone, not a one of us will go quietly into the night.

  • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

    Ha ha!
    Judge Napolitano has a credibility problem. The problem is he so lacking in credibility that others at Fox News notice.

    http://crooksandliars.com/2017/03/fox-news-denies-napolitano

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Napolitano is a willing dupe of the GRU.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      The thing is – Dolt 45 said it now. Even the idiots who watch nothing but Faux won’t process the whole story, which is that Dolt 45 pulled something out of his ass and then looked around for someone to blame it on, as he always does. It came out of Twitler’s mouth, therefore for the Trumpanzees, it’s the new reality. So what if there’s no “fact” or “truth” to it? It’s enough for them that Cheeto found a new thing to lie about Obama about, and they’ll run with it forever. Grrrrrrr

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I don’t even think they believe it. I think he’s their their one-man source for all their gish gallop needs.

      • TJ Barke

        But liberals are the dumb sheep…

  • bookish

    Monday, watch Comey testimony live online.

    http://www.cbsnews.com/news/fbi-director-james-comey-to-testify-at-russia-hearing-how-to-watch-online/

    → When: Monday, March. 20
    → CBSN’s coverage begins 10 a.m. ET
    → Online: CBSN will broadcast a video stream.
    → On TV: CBS News, other broadcast/cable news channels

  • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

    The only thing America is “winning” at is being embarrassed.

    https://twitter.com/nycjayjay/status/842936135668121600

    • bookish

      I did not know that about Merkel. Awesome.

    • Prof. T. Green Bastard

      I have terminal Presidential Embarrassment. I should sue. Who’s w me? I’ll bet we can make this case a class-action.

      • Alan

        That’s interesting. I think we can actually prove damages.

      • Christopher Story

        Class action! American Public v POTUS

    • Doug Langley

      Ah, I ain’t impressed. I hear Angela has a private email server.

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance
      • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

        Hence why Dumpy gets called Orange Hitler because he can’t stop doing Hitler-like things.

        • Zyxomma

          I believe the correct title is Twitler.

          • Maryannmmarks

            Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours & have longer with friends and family! !da184c:
            On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
            !da184c:
            ➽➽
            ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialCashJobs474MarketCoachGetPaid$97/Hour ★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫::::::!da184c:….,….

    • TJ Barke

      #sickofwinning

    • Vecchioivan

      Fake science. Sad.

    • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

      Cool. Merkel would have understood one of my noncomments to the troll on the previous thread. Donnie understands nothing.

    • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

      Can we give Merkel American citizenship and have her be our Prez? Pleeeeaase?

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      He is an international embarrassment.

      • Liberoid Ron

        If George Tsoukalos is right he may be an interstellar embarrassment.

      • George Kaplan

        I am convinced that the surprising defeat of the Far Right in the Netherlands’ elections this week was as a direct result of Trump.

        The Good People of Holland took a long look at Trump, and collectively said to themselves the Dutch equivalent of, …

        “Aw, HELLLLL NO!”

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          I believe you are right. I just wish our own idiot electorate had taken a long look at Trump. I had to laugh when I was reading a National Review Online comment board, and someone said “I think the alternative (Clinton) might have been better.” Uh, yeah, you think?

          • George Kaplan

            Oh, I haven’t been at NRO for a while! Thanks for reminding me.

            Their comment boards are just jaw-dropping!

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            It’s like Breitbart, but not as overtly racist, and with proper punctuation and spelling.

        • Penny Dreadful Says Resist

          Brexit came as a shock to many, but it was understandable given the political climate. Trump came out of left field and caused a lot of nations to sit up and take notice. I guess if you can’t be a good example, you can at least provide a proper warning, or how ever that saying goes.

          • George Kaplan

            If it doesn’t go that way, it ought to.

            Concise, and profoundly relevant, these days.

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    I was reading this article this morning about what they want in a wall and I was trying to think of how to achieve it. The only solution: force fields.
    Now somebody just needs to invent them.

    “Government seeks designs for ‘physically imposing’ border wall”
    http://www.cnn.com/2017/03/18/politics/trump-border-wall-specifications/index.html

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Brandon the Builder has left the planet. Good luck, dumbshits.

      • Sister the Resister

        And Bob the Builder refused to participate, on principle.

        • Jennifer R

          Bonus! They would have no choice but to do a ton of business with Cemex.

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            Saw a headline today saying Cemex was bowing to pressure and refused to cooperate on any wall (at least that’s what they’re saying, we’ll see what happens if they come to cemex with a contract for many Ameros).

          • Jennifer R

            Not even sure where they could source enough concrete then.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        I just had an idea for the wall, but what I’m actually wondering about is an ethical problem, so:

        If you came up with an idea to build this wall and get ALL the munniez for your idea, would you do it, considering what it will do and what it would represent?

        GO!

        • Sister the Resister

          My wall would have a food and water station, hand out a Welcome to the US of A kit, and fucking take care of people. But then, that’s just me….

          Also, if the wall is thick enough, it could have actual rooms within it, maybe some places to take a snooze, and a cafe. Also, an infirmary.

          Am I being too optimistic?

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            With A/C of course.

            It was more of a thought experiment, like if you could get rich building drones to bomb villages in the mideast, would you do it. That’s slightly different as it’s an active killer vs. a passive, purely physical manifestation of a xenophobic idea.

          • Jennifer R

            If we can use drones to drop bombs on poor people, why can’t we like, drop food instead?

          • Prof. T. Green Bastard

            What are we, freeloading, hippie peaceniks?

            Oh. Yes. Yes we are. Carry on, then.

          • Alan

            Commie.

          • Liberoid Ron

            And it’s easier because food doesn’t have to delivered with high precision.

          • Sister the Resister

            To address your question more seriously, I don’t think I’d put the money into a wall at all, if I were serious about preventing undocumented immigration. I’d put it into intelligence, enforcement, etc. – basically personnel and info gathering. The wall itself seems like a very clumsy way to effectively keep people out, since folks keep finding ways around walls, or ways under and over them.

          • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

            Seriously, though.

            It only takes, like, a high school Social Studies class to know that walls have never worked and will never work.

          • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

            I’d just, y’know, not build a dumb wall in the first place and use that money to improve the country…but what do I know? I’m just a dumb liberal with feelings.

          • Alan

            Haha, you sound like me. I went out of business because my employees deserve naps and two hour lunches and fridays off and coming in when they feel like it and….

          • Sister the Resister

            LOLZ – but your comment, did make me think about how I’ve had some great bosses in my life, including my current one, who bonuses us both regularly and randomly, and who is now on hard times herself. Guess what? she has deservedly earned my loyalty, not just because of how she’s treated me, but how she’s watched over other employees. So I’ve gone above and beyond myself to get her through the current crisis, because, you know, BALANCE!

            One time she kept a coworker on for a year while he was going through chemo, an expensive part of which his insurance did not cover. He could barely make it through the day, and we all pitched in to cover what he could not do. But she gave him the hours to both make him feel useful (he was guilt tripping himself hard) and give him $$ to pay for meds.

          • Alan

            Well yeah, that’s what human beings do.

          • Sister the Resister

            Your comment makes me think of the definition of human (vs “animal”) from the Dune books

            “You’ve heard of animals chewing off a leg to escape a trap? There’s an animal kind of trick. A human would remain in the trap, endure the pain, feigning death that he might kill the trapper and remove a threat to his kind.”

            a violent version, but the same could apply if you switched out the trap and killing the trapper for, say, eating everything you caught yourself, vs sharing with the tribe/family, and sustaining people into the future.
            Long game, people! Long game!

          • puredog

            Bless your heart.

          • Shucky Ducky

            I’d have a shop. Not a big one, just a shop so people could shop. A shop does some people a world of good. Not me, but other people. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/0b2a39d89cd28960e96ff27e647a3b70faf6e90cf1fe019ed723b6b59e137c51.jpg

          • Liberoid Ron

            That’s not a wall, that’s a 1900-mile-long welcome center.
            Which is to say, sounds excellent.

        • Prof. T. Green Bastard

          30 foot high bas reliefs of the stupid, stupid faces Turnip is constantly pulling. People would run away screaming & never come back (including the ICE agents hired to patrol, but hey, collateral damage).

        • Alan

          No.

        • puredog

          If I were in the construction business and could likely execute such a plan, probably. Don’t blame the architect/contractor. This isn’t a Nuremberg deal, after all, just ill-conceived governmenting which, in a democracy, is not rare. Now if the plan was to somehow rain death on border crossers with electricity or bombs, you’d be getting into a touchier area.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      That’s hilarious. His bigly sooper-seekrit plan is to not get Mexico to pay for it and then crowdsource the plans. How much you willing to bet whoever wins this no-bid popularity contest has financial ties to the Kushners?

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        It’s pretty much the same thing with his sooper-seekrit plan to get rid of ISIS in 30 days, because all the generals were dummiez.

        Then he gets into office and it’s now: Generals, figure out a plan and send it to me. (I believe there’s an EO on that exact thing).

        • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

          And it’s been way more than 30 days. Of course, he also said he’d never be golfing because he’d be too busy working.

          • Villago Delenda Est

            Too busy working on his golf game…

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            Yep, is he still going to Marr-A-Lago everyweekend?

            For all the right’s bitchin’, it would be hilarious if trump has golfed every weekend of his first 60 days in office.

          • Jack Tenhet

            He has been going every weekend. He’s spent like half his time as president at Mar-A-Lago.

          • Liberoid Ron

            Never has so much effort been expended for such little result.

    • TJ Barke

      Will need lots of energy, coal jobs, here we come!

    • Panika MCD

      that still involves condemning a bunch of people’s properties. Shrub’s administration lost that one in court, will likely be the same here.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        is that the one that the Daily Show did a great piece on (back when I watched teh daily show).

        • Panika MCD

          I don’t remember them doing one. got a link?

    • Alan

      Nobody’s building a fucking wall.

  • Foocatchoo

    Those are just OLD people in black robes; FAKE Supreme Court!

  • Rachel Book Harlot

    And now for something nice. Have a great day, Wonkettes! I’m off to my niece’s birthday party. She’s 7 today. :)

    https://twitter.com/ValaAfshar/status/842530041183526912

    • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

      Awwwwwh~! ❤❤❤❤

    • Alan

      His brain must be on tilt.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      At first, the little tyke is overwhelmed by this new sensation, then he adjusts, and his delight is…who’s cutting onions near me! I demand answers!

    • Dazza

      Thank you. I needed that.

    • grindstone

      Jesus Pete…I’m sitting here having a sandwich and a Sunday mimosa and raining tears onto the bar. Thank you for that lovely thing!!

  • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie
    • Doug Langley

      Prima Donnie said that?? Dubious. Syntax is way too good.

    • Panika MCD

      I get to see a lot of good people from both major parties work together all the time. there are a few that suck–some Ds even, though not near as many as the Rs–but most of them are good people. now if we could just get rid of ALEC, we’d be set.

      • puredog

        Yeah, some of them may be good people, but most of them are rapists and drug dealers. It is known.

        • yyyaz

          Not to mention all mobbed up too also.

        • Panika MCD

          more coke heads and bathroom police.

    • Alan

      Hahahahaha.

    • Khavrinen

      Case in point….

  • bookish
    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Worth every ruble.

      • Panika MCD

        well, then Poots can pick up the tab.

    • “Now, we can justify this, because we have proof that this program moves Donald J. Trump from Washington to Mar a Lago. Meals on Wheels, on the other hand, who knows? Does anybody even know what it’s supposed to do?”

  • BMW

    By presenting facts and context, this article has a liberal bias and the author should obviously recuse herself because she knows how to read and write, and probably once looked at a picture of Obama.

  • bookish

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/graphics/politics/mercer-bannon/

    The Mercers’ approach is far different from that of other big donors. While better-known players such as the Koch brothers on the right and George Soros on the left focus on mobilizing activists and voters, the Mercers have exerted pressure on the political system by helping erect an alternative media ecosystem, whose storylines dominated the 2016 race.

    Their alliance with Bannon provided fuel for the narrative that drove Trump’s victory: that dangerous immigrants are ruining the country and corrupt power brokers are sabotaging Washington.

    Before he became President Trump’s chief strategist, Stephen K. Bannon was involved in several ventures with Republican mega-donor Robert Mercer and his daughter Rebekah.

    The wealthy New York family and the former investment banker-turned-media executive collaborated on at least five ventures between 2011 and 2016, according to a Washington Post review of public filings and multiple people familiar with their relationship. The extent of their partnership has not previously been reported.

    Through those projects, the Mercers and Bannon, now chief White House strategist, quietly built a power base aimed at sowing distrust of big government and eroding the dominance of the major news media.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      It would probably be useful to provide the link to the full article.

      • bookish

        Please refresh to see link. I only know how to post the link and excerpt separately, using the edit function. That’s why they do not show at the same time. If refreshed, they will show.

        • TJ Barke

          You should be able to paste both parts before you post.

          • Shanzgood

            Yes, please. Refreshing the page loses all the new notifications.

        • Shanzgood

          While you have the browser open for the referenced article, click the URL for the link. You should be able to copy it and then switch windows to come back here to post it. Then switch back to your article and copy/paste whatever text you want from it in the same way you did the link.

        • Shanzgood

          Oh and sometimes just the act of copying and pasting a quote from an article will cause it to automatically drop a link to it at the bottom of whatever you pasted. It depends on the site.

    • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

      The corrosive effect of money on politics could hardly be more plain. The American political system cannot be repaired as long as it remains awash in huge sums of private and corporate cash.

      • yyyaz

        I can’t even snark about this, because there is zero political incentive to ever make it happen. We are halfway down the slope to obliteration of liberal democracy and accelerating.

        • Liberoid Ron

          Do keep in mind that, so far, it’s only in the US that this is happening. It’s still alive and well in other places.

    • Prof. T. Green Bastard

      I read an article abt the Mercers a while back. It basically said that, even among their mega-wealthy peers, they’re friendless loner weirdos. Figures Bannon would be the one to willingly play w them.

  • bookish

    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/03/18/opinion/sunday/trump-working-class-zero.html?_r=0

    In ancient Egypt, there was the symbol of the ouroboros, the snake that eats its own tail. Nerve-addled octopuses sometimes consume their own arms.

    But we’ve never watched a president so hungrily devour his own presidency.

    Soon, there won’t be anything left except the sound of people snickering.

    Consumed by his paranoia about the deep state, Donald Trump has disappeared into the fog of his own conspiracy theories. As he rages in the storm, Lear-like, howling about poisonous fake news, he is spewing poisonous fake news.

    • Prof. T. Green Bastard

      MoDo’s never been the same since she OD’ed on the marijuanas.

      • Panika MCD

        that’s because she didn’t smoke in a safety meeting like the Choom Gang.

        • Prof. T. Green Bastard

          Safety first!

          (I hope O & Ms. Michelle got to choom it up on vacation. :D)

    • I’m not going to rub my hands with glee over the demise of 45’s presidency until he is out of there and in an orange jumpsuit.

    • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

      As I’ve said before, this version of Lear sucks!

      • Panika MCD

        only two daughters and one of them doesn’t even both to show up most of the time? what a rip-off!

        • (Major_Major_Major)ly_Pissed

          Tiffany is the lucky one.

  • Shoto

    All this Soros-funded, outside agitating is making me hungry!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e_3WzxpdUc0

  • HolidayinCambodia

    Here’s the last line with an (my) edit that was not permitted to be in the posted version:

    “As I said, I don’t know what the Court would do in the current case. But a win for the president is not a slam dunk, but as long as it makes him feel as if his dick is small, I think it’s fine with Wonketteers.”

  • yyyaz

    Has anyone posted the OPOS’ tweets about NATO from this morning? The Guardian has a nice piece explaining how fuckface orange has zero understanding of how it works.
    https://www.theguardian.com/world/2017/mar/18/trump-merkel-nato-germany-owe-money-tweet

    • Prof. T. Green Bastard

      Fuckface Orange (nice) has zero understanding of how tie clips work.

      • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

        Fuckface Orange has zero understanding of how ANYTHING works except how “bigly yuge” he wants to make everything.

        • HolidayinCambodia

          I don’t know about that. He seems to have a pretty good idea of how third-world tinpot dictatorship corruption works.

          • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

            True…but that still isn’t helping him.

          • Panika MCD

            no he doesn’t. that’s all Bannon’s Rasputin’s idea.

      • Panika MCD

        you mean that’s not what Scotch Tape is for? now I will have to rethink my entire Xmas shopping list. thanks, Obama.

    • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

      I have yet to see any evidence that he understands how ANYTHING works…

      • HolidayinCambodia

        He knows how corruption works.

        • Panika MCD

          again, you’re thinking of President Bannon Rasputin.

      • Shoto

        To be fair, he’s pretty good at bankruptcy.

        • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

          True, but I’m not at all certain he really understands it. I’m sure he still doesn’t have a fucking clue why all his businesses failed. If Trump had not inherited big money he’d probably be pushing a shopping cart loaded with his worldly goods down Fifth Avenue, muttering to himself and looking for fresh newspapers to stuff in his boots.

      • Zyxomma

        Oops, I should’ve read before I replied.

    • Duke

      He’s a buffoon. Between his limited knowledge, desire for attention and pandering to his base he can’t do anything but be an idiot.

    • Zyxomma

      To be “fair,” Dictator Tot doesn’t understand how ANYTHING works.

  • Panika MCD

    I think someone just came into my coffee shop with a coyote on a leash.

    • Well, that’s a little different.

      • Panika MCD

        I’ve heard of coydogs before–never thought they were real.

        • Shanzgood

          I met a lady at a party in Seattle who had one.

          • Panika MCD

            I’ve been told by people that they have them. but never saw one in person. it’s kind of like when we found out the cat we bought was an American bob and found a bunch of stuff saying they were cat-bob cat hybrids–it’s just: no. that doesn’t happen. the interwebz says they don’t happen because coyotes are season specific breeders and dogs breed year round. probably also because coyotes tend to kill dogs.

          • Shanzgood

            Welp, it sure looked like a coyote to me.

          • Sister the Resister

            Possible, though not common in urban settings, sez the wiki on “Coydogs”

            Love, or lust, will find a way….

          • Shanzgood

            Yup, I saw some of that info as well. The lady I met was Native American so possibly she came from a non-urban area where it was possible or where their territory had been encroached on. IIRC, it wasn’t normally legal to have them as pets there but she was allowed to? I might be misremembering, though, since it was a long time ago.

            I wouldn’t have one, though.

          • Sister the Resister

            I don’t know about coyotes, but I’ve been told that when it comes to wolf-dog mixes, it makes a huge difference if the mom is a wolf or a dog – dog-mom’s of wolf-dog pups maybe impart different lessons? in any case, the idea is that the ones raised by dog moms are easier to have in human company, the ones raised by wolf moms not so much.

          • Panika MCD

            that was my question: was it there or did they just say they had one? may have been. I’m just not clear on how they get the coyote to not kill the dog.

          • Shanzgood

            A big enough dog during coyote mating season and no available coyotes?

            Yes, the hybrid was there. Kind of eerie and aloof. And very skinny.

          • Panika MCD

            in the neighborhood I was just living in, the coyotes would befriend the big dog, lead it out and attack it in a pack.

        • Liberoid Ron

          The animal sanctuary back where I used to live had a pair. Smart and friendly but unpredictable and dangerous to humans. They most likely died in captivity.

        • It’s a completely new concept to me. And I used to live down there.

          • Panika MCD

            define “down there”. I always thought that was a reference to genitals, but if you’re talking about the South, you should know that the last time I was in Fairbanks, AK I was informed that there are now coyotes in Gold Stream Valley near my family’s home.

          • I was under the impression that you are in the Austin area. I went to school there, for a time, and was in Dallas-ish before and after.

          • Panika MCD

            I am in the Austin area, but my point was they’re all over the fucking place.

          • And mine was that I’ve never actually seen one as a pet. Now, I have seen someone leading a chicken around on a leash. That was weird, even for someone like me who owns chickens.

          • Panika MCD

            I think it was a coydog…but I didn’t really think those existed.

    • Alan

      Doubt it.

      • Panika MCD
        • Alan

          Absolutely, I have no doubt it looked like that but the probability that it was a dog that looked like a coyote vs actually being a coyote is almost certain. My wife is a vet and they get a steady stream of people insisting they have some kind of wild animal or hybrid and it’s always nonsense. The chances of domesticating a coyote are pretty slim to begin with and the chance of a hybrid is ridiculously small unless you do it on purpose and, even then, you can’t continue breeding them in captivity because of fertility. Most likely it was some mutt that happened to look that way. Now had you heard it howling at sundown….

          • Panika MCD

            coyotes don’t howl a whole lot. they cackle. but that’s why I always thought it was a weird claim. for one thing, coyotes are season specific breeders and dogs are not. for another, they often kill dogs so you’d have to have one in captivity which seems like a big imposition–especially if you’re going to try to breed it with a dog. and I’d assume that the male would have to be the coyote because it’d be easier to care for a dog who is pregnant than a coyote that is.

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg

    Could you stop putting down orange? it’s kind of our national colour an we love it so much. http://static.goal.com/100700/100790_heroa.jpg

    • Dutch treat?

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        That will be soon called Trump treat.

        • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

          A Mar-a-Lago steamer?

          • Shanzgood

            Ew

    • HolidayinCambodia

      Too much clothes. Sad!

    • Shanzgood

      That’s a good color. I can wear that.

      Trump Orange, not so much.

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg
        • Shanzgood

          My goodness! She’s delightfully…zaftig!

          • Robbertjan Brandenburg

            We have the bestest bigly’s

          • Shanzgood

            I obviously need more pasta.

            Or what do you folks eat there? That seems to be working!

          • Robbertjan Brandenburg

            AGV. Aardappels groente vlees, Potatoes, vegetables, meat. That’s the diet of winners. Plus lotsa milk and cheese.

          • Robbertjan Brandenburg

            I just looked up zaftig. My new favorite word.

          • Zyxomma

            Yes, it’s Yiddish for juicy. Great word.

        • TundraGrifter

          That’s a peach of a pair right there.

        • Foocatchoo

          SHE might just be able to arouse Trump’s garden slug of a penis back to life….

          • Shanzgood

            *reaches for salt*

    • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

      “Angry manbaby orange” isn’t the same as “pretty Dutch orange”, just saying. 😉

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        Fair enough

      • Prof. T. Green Bastard

        Much like the difference between navel oranges & Agent Orange. :P

        • Shanzgood

          Heh!

      • Sister the Resister

        Remember when all is USofA librulz laughed at John of Orange (Boehner) for his strangely-hued hide? Good times, good times….

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        Wish I could have every wonketeer experience King’s day! :D

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bq5-O7vrPEU

    • Prof. T. Green Bastard

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/635ddd421c65c39a7f9dc7a434a8cfa4e16373dd29ffb68dbd059ec8c8f28fd9.jpg

      My boss also has a bone to pick. That whole “terrible orange asshole” schtick was his before Turnip stole it.

      • Shucky Ducky

        Your boss wants to know why you’re commenting on a mommyblog instead of doing important work. Those kibs aren’t going to pour themselves. YOU’RE FIRED!!!

    • Panika MCD

      clothes that are orange are great. skin that is orange? not so much:

      https://www.plannedparenthoodaction.org/files/8413/7227/1925/texas-unruly-mob.jpg

    • Alan

      Huh, they look like Scottish girls with smiles.

    • Zyxomma

      I love the color orange; I wear it frequently (and am often the only one in it). OTOH, I loathe and despise Dictator Tot.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    Oh ffs, the Nation is both sidesing the fucking vacation spending? When horseshoes happen to good liberal publications.

    https://twitter.com/AriMelber/status/843181361456447488

    • yyyaz

      At least he’s taking some heat on that, not that there is enough heat for that kind of apologist tripe.

      • Taking some heat isn’t nearly enough heat, considering how the conservatives howled about Obama’s modest vacation spending. Buncha’ hypocrites.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        In the final analysis, the “elite journalists” speak for their in group. It doesn’t really matter what side they claim to be on.

        • Liberoid Ron

          Ever since Thomas Carlyle called them the ‘Fourth Estate,’ a subset of the press has seen itself as Above It All. They occasionally forget why they exist at all.

    • Panika MCD

      the point is that Bamz went on vacay like once a year and the rest of the time he was on official state business. Tsarina Gold Tower does it because he’s a spoiled brat and every weekend. he’ll be exceeding Bamz’s travel budget by June and probably Shrub’s by December.

    • ariel_gee_398

      Isn’t he the MSNBC Ari, not the Nation Ari? Not that detracts from your point, but I expect that a bit more from MSNBC Ari. (Especially after reading his wiki and finding out that his qualifications for “Chief Legal Correspondent” at MSNBC are 4 years working in BigLaw in NYC.)

      • Carpe Vagenda

        He’s both. And Glenn Greenwald got his start at Kellyanne’s husband’s firm.

    • yyyaz

      Compared with the non-shopped size of his yoooge, ugly ass, he would be rummaging around in there for a week just to find his phone.

    • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

      “And there’s so much stuff up there! Plenty more to come folks!”

    • Sister the Resister

      Sounded off in my head with a perfect Alec Baldwin impression.

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    It should be tall, climb-resistant, difficult to penetrate

    Come on now, enough about Melania.

    http://www.cnn.com/2017/03/18/politics/trump-border-wall-specifications/index.html

    • Panika MCD

      I heard there were two responses to the RFDs–one was 15-30 ft and concrete. the other was pretty much the same as what we have in other areas–a fence.

    • Shoto
      • Shanzgood

        That looks like it’s from Walking Dead.

        • The Witch of Endor

          Theirs were built more securely. They still did shit, but they were better built.

      • yyyaz

        Get outta my back yard!

    • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

      Among the requirements is that the wall be “aesthetically pleasing in color” and blend into or match the surrounding landscape on the US side. It does not address the aesthetics of the Mexican side.

      Hell, that’s easy:

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/11291669f185647b08425cfd8a860b9404e0bd746eec5828c0a510787291cf00.jpg

      • Tallmutha

        The Messicans can do whatever they want on their side, after all they’re paying for it.

    • WeaselPoo

      Very droll.

      The RFD asks for the wall to have a six foot deep foundation to prevent tunneling
      — because Mexicans can’t dig any deeper?
      There is no length required
      —surely they could specify “at least nnn miles long” ?
      Height is to be “18 to 30 feet”
      —- no doubt sanctions will be harsh if mexico attempts to start a 32-foot ladder development program
      American side is supposed to be a “pleasing color”
      —screw that, it should have a mural that reproduces the view from Gondor’s city gates of Sauron’s Orc army

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        “Pleasing color”. Sounds like some HOA agreement.

      • Liberoid Ron

        30 feet tall, with a six-foot foundation? First decent rain the thing’ll be on its side.

      • TheAmazingAmateurHousekeeper

        I wonder how that will work in the middle of the Rio Grande

  • The Librarian

    OT: H.R. 676: Expanded & Improved Medicare For All Act

    New Cosponsor: Rep. Suzanne Bonamici [D-OR1]

    New Cosponsor: Rep. Anna Eshoo [D-CA18]

    New Cosponsor: Rep. Brian Higgins [D-NY26]

    New Cosponsor: Rep. Gregory Meeks [D-NY5]

    The bill now has 69 cosponsors (69 Democrats).

    And a 3% chance of passing. :(

    • yyyaz

      Pffft. They’re all the same.
      — 100 million non-voters

      • TJ Barke

        DON’T THEY KNOW THAT’S SOSHULISM!? HOW WILL THEY BE MOTIVATED TO DO ANYTHING EVER??!?!?!?!?1/1??!

        • ariel_gee_398

          How can we expect people to cure cancer using bootstraps if we just give them medical care for free?

          • TJ Barke

            Right? Something something free markets, something something rugged individualism!

    • Panika MCD

      which is to say: it has a better chance of passing than the “AHCA”.

    • Sister the Resister

      Sometimes a bill is not for passing, but rather a type of performance art, be it boring and legislative. More power to the art of protest!

    • An Outhouse for the Resistance

      Yeah Brian Higgins. Buffalo rocks for a change.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    People you’d probably want to stop helping if you had anyone else on the bench

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/c079ff1e264d996e1144fe0d379f747ea152a0949746e5bd6676e826d91c28e7.jpg

    • yyyaz

      Gotta love the !!: “I sure told you off, libtard!!”

      • Tallmutha

        “This guy talks as if shooting yourself in the foot wasn’t a totally everyday thing.”

        • RobespierreHoo

          In his world, common as a paper cut.

    • NastyBossetti

      Is he being literal? Honestly not sure…

      • Carpe Vagenda

        You know, there aren’t even context clues any more.

  • Nick Scroggs

    Hey where do I submit my ideas for the border wall? Basically, it’d be 40 feet high, resemble the Vektan-Helgast Wall, checkpoints, 120mm cannons against anyone who gets too close, even a no-man-land to extend outwards of the wall several miles like the Korean DMZ. By my best guesses, if they actually did that proposal, the administration would collapse by December. Edit, and that’s not involving my plans for using DYI biotech to endow animals with superintelligence and rise up, I’ve said too much.

    • mancityRed6
      • Nick Scroggs

        For some reason it’s not showing up.

        • mancityRed6

          yeah, disqus hates it for some reason, right click on “thumbnail” and open in a new window.
          *shakes fist at disqus*

          • Nick Scroggs

            Okay, see it. I’d think they would put a few gun batteries, electrified wires, a blood runoff tunnel like in the beginning of The Evil Within (though that’d be more Steve Bannon’s thing).

          • mancityRed6

            (needs two people to assemble)

          • Nick Scroggs

            And three to move it into place, same with that giant Kallax I got a while back.

          • mancityRed6

            I just need a couple of the four shelf Kallax to get my books and dvds out of the storage/laundry room.

          • Nick Scroggs

            Nah, for DVDs i would go with the Finnby, Kallax shelves just are a waste of space for something small like DVDs, I’ve found.

          • mancityRed6

            I have to cover up the google fiber outlet. that requires something of a certain height.
            yeah, I got the google fiber. $50 for all the bandwidth I’ll ever need.
            Look upon me and…well…whatever you want to do

      • ZangoCrudmonger

        Heh, one wrench. Seems legit.

        • Sister the Resister

          I don’t know, I think Ikea should include two. You just know that after the first million turns, the thing’s gonna start cracking.

          • mancityRed6

            you’d be surprised how long they last.

    • kareemachan

      I guess it was a good thing after all that Obama’s administration shot down the Death Star even after it got a lot of signatures on the government petition website.

    • Panika MCD

      I get that the kids of the racist parents would have picked up their language at home and brought it to the competition. I didn’t honestly think the parents would say it! what a bunch of shitheads.

      and the fact that these kids say they’ve heard it all before: while it’s great that it has inured them to hatred so they can overcome it, they shouldn’t be subjected to it period.

      • Alan

        Doesn’t surprise me. You’ve never been to Indiana?

        • Panika MCD

          I would think that the parents would react like TX parents: they believe it, but they’re certainly not going to admit it in public.

          • Alan

            They must at least have some manners.

          • Panika MCD

            they might say, “bless your heart!”

    • yyyaz

      Say, you know who else is from Indiana…

  • Martini Ambassador
    • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

      He is one of the most brazen, shameless liars in history.

  • memzilla Ω
    • Prof. T. Green Bastard
    • Sister the Resister

      If they made a nice big sign like that, I’d say a LOT of people asked.

    • Jeffocaster in the desert

      I don’t believe the sign. Whiskas has some dairy farm in China milking cats, keeping them preggie and locking them in cages.

    • BoziSpicer

      Must be from a store in Trumpistan.

  • Rick Hill
    • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

      “Verdammt noch mal…whatever am I going to do with you, Donald?” is all I see in her expression.

  • Martini Ambassador
  • Carpe Vagenda

    Hey, that GA election is coming, if you have a few bucks. Just make sure Act Blue doesn’t automatically sign you up for regular payments and store your credit card.

    • Panika MCD

      ActBlue also too has a great way of unsubscribing you. it’s not the Tsarina Von Clownstick campaign, after all.

  • Martini Ambassador

    OMG, fill out the survey on how awesome Donnie is: https://gop.com/president-trump-first-50-survey/

    • The Librarian

      If I filled out how I really felt….. Don’t want any strange visitors. o.O

      • Panika MCD

        you really need to make a ghost account for yourself.

        • The Librarian

          Hmmm, yes, indeed……

    • Panika MCD

      done. note to the wonkers: refer to Tsarina Von Clownstick as “President Trump” just to fuck with them.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      I couldn’t put in Juan “Mad Dog” Ramirez as my name. I haz a sad.

      • Martini Ambassador

        I went with the standard Fuck You at fuckyou@wh.gov

        • BoziSpicer

          I went with Steve Bannon at PresidentBannon@wh.gov

        • Sister the Resister

          I use an email, created in honor of one of my dead cats, for these kind of things. She subscribes to all kind of right-wing emailings etc, though I make her more of a socially conscious conservative (WWJD type) than a Trumpanzee. I’ll have to create an email based on my asshole cat of many years ago (meaning an asshole, even by cat standards), a being I would not mind honoring with all manor of rudeness.

      • Jack Tenhet

        I went with “Watchingyouthroughthetoster@CIA.gov

    • Sister the Resister

      Hey, they learned how to use checkboxes in lieu of radio buttons!

    • Jack Tenhet

      That was just creepy. I just clicked “disapprove” on everything. They actually use the phrase “fake news” in the damned thing. Reeks of desperation.

      They’re also begging for money.

      But the liberal fake news media machine will not report on President *redacted* accomplishments.

      Help us find ways to cut through the noise and deliver our message straight to the voter.

      Please make a contribution to Make America Great Again!

  • janecita
    • Alan

      Rhetorical question?

      • janecita

        I’m just so damn frustrated with all these idiots!

        • Alan

          That’s apparent.

    • BoziSpicer

      “I was under the influence…” pretty much says it all.

      • janecita

        That’s what I thought!

    • Panika MCD

      the Trumps aren’t people.

    • Roni Raven, Just Microwavin’
    • I’m also wondering why the url suggests the headline should be “One Direction singer says Trump once kicked band out of hotel for not meeting his daughter.”

    • Carpe Vagenda
      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        Sure it is…

      • BoziSpicer

        “To insanity…and beyond!”

      • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

        Was Tim Allen always this insane!?

        • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

          Cocaine never improves your neurons.

          • Jack Tenhet

            I was gonna say Cocaine is a hell of a drug.

        • Carpe Vagenda

          He has served time for being a coke dealer and he’s pretty clearly roided, so probably.

      • Panika MCD

        yeah, being a social outcast is the exact same thing as being put in a gas chamber. YOU BET!

        • Alan

          After watching your family die from starvation or disease. Assuming they weren’t gassed first.

          • Panika MCD

            and before that you got to wear nice yellow stars and have your business front destroyed by a bunch of snowflakes.

        • Jack Tenhet

          Being a social outcast for having no talent in an industry that kinda demands talent is like his own personal Auschwitz. That’s what they all think, they’re being persecuted for their beliefs, not because they serve no marketable purpose.

          Entertainment is a business. If he could sell tickets, they’d cast him. They don’t because he doesn’t.

          • Panika MCD

            has anyone tried telling him to pull himself up by his bootstraps?

          • Jack Tenhet

            No shit!

      • OrG

        Move,Asshole.Plenty of space in Alabama.

        • Jack Tenhet

          His coked out ass can have our old place.

      • Alan

        Boohoo.

      • yyyaz

        Another one to cross off my list. Hmmm, can’t seem to find him on it.

        • Carpe Vagenda

          Just saying, apparently the Galaxy Quest thing was more like behaving.

      • TootsStansbury

        Of course being a right winger is like 1930s Germany. They’re all a bunch of out and out Nazis nowadays.

      • Jack Tenhet

        That means absolutely nothing coming from a guy whose entire career has always been grunting sounds. If “Hollywood” (I put it in quotes because almost literally nothing is made in Hollywood anymore) was so cruel to him, they’d have left his ass in a shitty Comedy club in the eighties when he was a coke dealer.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      “What would you say to him to convince him not to cut this program?” Miller asked Preast.

      “What if it was your momma?” Preast said.

      https://youtu.be/_j0KhXH6xLE

    • SayItWithOtters

      “I was under the influence that he was going to help us.”

      I’ll say.

      • Jack Tenhet

        “I was under the influence. . .”

        Every 45 supporter.

  • Suttree

    Since we had no red wine, I went with cumin and coriander to spice the beef stew up. #cookingformysweetheart

    • Sister the Resister

      I love coriander. Never thought about using it with beef, but this sounds good!

      • Jack Tenhet

        “Things like being careful with your coriander,
        That’s what makes the gravy grander!”

  • Shanzgood

    JFC. NPR is calling Dolt 45’s wiretapping comments to Markell an “attempt at joking” that just fell flat.

    • BoziSpicer

      So is Donnie getting prepared for the WHCDinner?

      • Jack Tenhet

        He’s skipping out on that. I think uit should be held anyway and they can just roast his empty chair. That would be funnier and way more fitting than having his bloated carcass there.

        • Liberoid Ron

          And make sure he gets the video so he can see himself being mocked in absentia.

    • Did you hear that Kellyanne was just “joking” about microwaves with cameras, and it’s just that nobody has a sense of humor, anymore?

      • Shanzgood

        Ugh, really?!

      • Jack Tenhet

        Problem is that THEY don’t have a sense of humor. We all have a very healthy sense of humor. We know when something’s just not funny and they’re just not funny.

    • Tiny kaiju

      I’m sure Trump thought he was being funny. Nobody else did because it wasn’t.

      • Alan

        Might have been humorous if he hadn’t made the whole thing up.

    • Prof. T. Green Bastard

      Now we just need Clownstick to take to the twitters & double down on that bullshit.

    • SeekingResistanceBarbie

      All his attempts/excuses about “joking” fall flat.

    • Panika MCD

      I’m fine with him thinking that rather than being “commander-in-chief”, he’s “comedian-in-chief”. he sucks at it, but it keeps us safer.

    • OrG

      Like Pee Wee Herman wrecking his bike and saying “I did that on purpose.”

    • Alan

      I’m growing tired of NPR.

      • Shanzgood

        Maybe if they lose their funding they’ll stop trying to save it in such disgusting ways.

        • Alan

          Has the pandering not become obvious to all of their listeners?

          • Shanzgood

            Yes, and I wasn’t even listening! I just accidentally scrolled past a headline! It’s in the HEADLINES now!

          • Alan

            It’s sad actually. Like when they discontinued the coffee I drank for 30 years or redesigned my favorite pants so they don’t quite fit anymore.

          • Shanzgood

            Yes. Just like that.

          • Roni Raven, Just Microwavin’

            That’s why pants aren’t required here.

          • yyyaz

            You know you’re old when they quit making your aftershave.

          • Alan

            That’s gotta hurt.

          • yyyaz

            Bada-boom!

          • Alan

            Aim to please.

          • Liberoid Ron

            I stopped shaving in 1979, to avoid this very thing.

        • Carpe Vagenda

          this.

          • Shanzgood

            If that happens, I would be willing to send them dollars. But I’d need to see some “proof of life” first.

        • BoziSpicer

          Don’t take away my Saturday shows!!

          • Shanzgood

            I was an avid fan of Car Talk for a long time so I get that!

      • BoziSpicer

        The past few weeks I have been listening to books-on-tape instead of NPR on my drives to and from work. Did you know that the Harry Potter movies are very different from the books? ;-)

        • Alan

          Wow, me too. I got A Generation of Sociopaths. The very first audio book I’ve ever owned because I was going to get into an accident screaming at NPR to NOT LET THEM LIE!!! Good book, I recommend it.

          • BoziSpicer

            Unfortunately, we are living in a generation of sociopaths. I will keep hoping that progressives will eventually win.

          • Jack Tenhet

            First audio book I ever owned was “The Restaurant at the End of the Universe”. My mom and I were going on a long roadtrip and radio reception was really spotty back then.

            Never listen to NPR anymore mostly because the local station here just sucks. No “Wait, wait don’t tell me” or “Fresh Air” or anything decent here.

          • BoziSpicer

            You can still hear these at the NPR website. My go to when I miss a weekend.

          • Jack Tenhet

            Oh, didn’t know that! It’s appreciated! :)

        • TootsStansbury

          You’ve lasted this long? I stopped when Comey barfed up the reopening of the email ratfuckery.

          • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

            That’s when I switched to my phone’s playlist.

        • ltmcdies

          Sauron did it????

          • Jack Tenhet

            Sauron with the aid of Morgan LeFay and Shiwan Khan stole the Maltese Falcon because the call was coming from inside the Pet Semetary!

          • vivian

            Dude! Howzabout a Spoiler Alert next time? Sheez.

          • Nick Scroggs

            Shiwan Khan? Who else is involved, the Purple Empire?

          • Jack Tenhet

            And The Black Hand, or was that the League of Shadows?

          • ltmcdies

            I want that movie….

          • Jack Tenhet

            I do too! Only, though, if Morgan Freeman plays Sauron this time around. Maybe Vera Farmiga as Morgan and Jet Li as Shiwan Khan.

        • Sister the Resister

          For me, a timely comment – I found the whole series to download (free) to my not-kindle app (AIReader, fwiw) and just started in on Book II last night. So many fun things in the books that didn’t make it to the movies, and lots of foreshadowing too, of course.

          • BoziSpicer

            I am currently in the middle of Order of the Phoenix. Enjoying the extra depth to the characters that the books bring.

          • Sister the Resister

            Actually, thinking of Order of the Phoenix is what got me back into reading the series. Such a dark, dark book, but in a We Will Endeavor to Survive! way. I felt like I kind of needed it.

            I’ve read the whole series a couple of times before, and read most of them before I saw the movies. I like the films, but the books are definitely better, and her playfulness with language comes across better (true of the Lemony Snicket stuff too)

    • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

      Isn’t it too late for NPR to suck up to him? He’s already proposed, or at least President Bannon has, to eliminate them.

    • Jeffocaster in the desert

      I am surprised he didn’t massage her shoulders and grab her pussy like W did.

    • Hairstrike Alpha

      Groveling isn’t going to get them removed from the wingnut hitlist. It’s like what happens when a conservative sees a Hispanic person speak who doesn’t sound Cheech or Juan Valdez: it just confuses them and makes them angrier

    • Carpe Vagenda

      I’m starting to wonder if the small portion of their budget the feds represent is worth the VoA style Republican propaganda they promote.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      NPR. Nice Polite Republicans.

      These guys need serious vote storms.

      • Sister the Resister

        To be honest, I prefer the Nice Polite Republicans to the other kind. Maybe the key is to stop looking to NPR to be consistently center-left.

    • Jack Tenhet

      He’s an attempt at a joke that just keeps falling flat.

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    There is hope. Randy Rainbow featured on home page of the NYT.

    “Beauty and the Beast,” which opened on Friday, has angered some conservatives by depicting what its director calls “an exclusively gay moment” for the character LeFou (Josh Gad). Here, the comedian Randy Rainbow, creator of such political parodies as “Putin and the Ritz,” responds to the controversy in song.

    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/03/18/opinion/randy-rainbow-the-terrifying-tolerance-promoting-beauty-and-the-beast.html?action=click&pgtype=Homepage&clickSource=story-heading&module=opinion-c-col-left-region&region=opinion-c-col-left-region&WT.nav=opinion-c-col-left-region&_r=0

    • Alan

      So they shouldn’t go see it?

    • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

      Gaahh! I still need to see that! Especially now that it makes the conservatives mad.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      On the same day that they published a tindr profile for Don Trump Jr in the Style section. Hey, gay folks, sorry your marriages are going to be dissolved by the candidate we promoted. Here, be charming for the nice people.

    • Jack Tenhet

      What’s hysterical is that it’s a big nothing burger. Three seconds at the end of the movie that only vaguely tracks as maybe, possibly gay only after having advance notice that it’s supposed to be gay. The right-wingers are raging about absolutely nothing, as is usual for them. They’re running out of windmills to imagine dragons with.

  • Jeffocaster in the desert

    OK, I admit it. I WIRED TAPPPPPPED TRUMPF. I needed to know what the REAL art of the deal was and it turns out taco shells for taco bowls. I tipped the election his way, because, I am a proud member of the Right Wing Militia and gun toting retard.

  • Hairstrike Alpha

    This order is going to get tossed out harder and faster than a fist punches Richard Spencer in the face: it’s permanently tainted.

    • Jack Tenhet

      Well, yeah! You can’t go on record constantly saying something is a Mooslim ban and not have it be safely assumed that the intent is to be a Mooslim ban. He won’t shut up about it and that’s what’s hurting him the most with, well, everything.

      Man doesn’t know the value of shutting the hell up. Stupid people rarely do.

  • Nick Scroggs

    So where should we send our suggestions to the White house on how to build a border wall? I think I’ve got it figured out now, to sell to the White House: 60 feet tall, barbed electrified wires, automated sentry guns every 15 feet, tank cannons with depleted uranium rounds, traps that lead into rotating knives and a blood disposal tunnel (see video below), computerized sentries that automatically exterminate all non-Anglo people via genetic “radar”, and while they’re at it, a no-man’s-land extending several miles out form each side f the all except for checkpoints. And to make sure it’s a no-man’s-land, a regular spray every week of toxic chemicals and radiological materials, to ensure no human, animals, or plants can even get close to the wall or live near the US whatsoever. And now, the blood tunnel inspiration: https://youtu.be/uYlbY_DVcrU?t=8m48s

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance
      • Nick Scroggs

        I almost ptiiiu that up instead, but then I thought “Nah, let’s go with the bloodbath.”

      • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

        “Are you proposing that we slaughter our tenants?”

  • Today in good news

    Pastor charged in connection with his granddaughter’s death

    In what is thought to be the first prosecution of its kind, Pennsylvania pastor Rowland Foster, above left, has been charged in connection with the death his own granddaughter who died from medical neglect.

    /snip

    Foster has been charged charged with a felony under a state law requiring clergy members, teachers and other “mandated reporters” to turn the names of suspected child abusers over to authorities for investigation.

    https://twitter.com/FreethinkerMag/status/843194168381988864

    • Panika MCD

      this is not the first of its kind. but it’s still so annoying that this keeps happening.

      • What is good is that the charge is under the mandatory reporting statute

  • Jack Tenhet

    Right-wingers try to exploit a woman, as they are want to do, only she’s having none of it.

    “I was actually doing pretty well with my mental state, and then I see
    this and I am so outraged. I have transgender friends. I work with
    transgender people. They are people. They identify differently and I
    don’t care where they use the bathroom. When I see a transgender person
    in the bathroom, we talk about lip gloss,” Herron told KIRO Radio.

    http://www.lgbtqnation.com/2017/03/transphobic-campaign-exploits-sexual-assault-victims-story-image/

    • Shanzgood

      The problem is that they don’t even pretend it’s trans people they’re worried about. Their stated excuse is that cis men will use permissive laws to attack “our wives and daughters” in public spaces. Cis men are using THEMSELVES and their fucked up rape-culture toxic masculinity to not only discriminate against trans people but continue to infantilize cis women and girls. AM SICK OF THIS SHIT.

      • Shanzgood

        I should have said cis HET men.

      • Jack Tenhet

        You’re right. This is just a screwed up license to openly discriminate based on nothing that has ever happened. They’re playing the white knight riding in to save their “wives and daughters” from dangers that exist only in their minds.

        Even I know that women have to be on guard around cis-hetero-men at all times. Women have no “safe space” in that regard. The ones women fear are the ones they know because those are the ones they are most likely to be attacked by. Of course, these are also the same people who believe that a male can’t possibly rape his wife.

    • BosGrl

      I have so much admiration for this woman, for telling her original story so fiercely (and OMG that GPS) and for fighting being exploited in an equally strong way.

      • Jack Tenhet

        Me too! It’s just insanely cruel that they made her a token victim for something their stupid bill doesn’t even address and instead makes more possible.

        I know a few people who transitioned to male and they look and act like men. That’s the insane thing about a “bathroom bill”, it gives a license to cis-gendered men to walk into a ladies room without a second look. It’s just stupid.

        • BoatOfVelociraptors

          That happened the day after here in North Carolina. “I just gotta check”.

  • Jeffocaster in the desert

    I hear the Easter Egg Roll at the White House will be with gold plated turds. And it will be Playboy Bunnies putting out the eggs and only white males over the age of 60 will be invited.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    Fox & Friends apparently believe muslims are a different species.

    https://twitter.com/yashar/status/843186022561316868

    • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

      Teh stupid, it burns!

    • Alan

      In all fairness, they do have sex with their sheep.

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      “Swedes have pure genes.”

      Never has there been a more racist and ignorant thing said on tv, ever. Well, not since the Berlin Olympics.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        They really said this? Because all beings have pure genes.

      • Panika MCD

        I’m 1/4th Swedish. I do not approve this message.

    • Liberoid Ron

      Err, someone needs to check all the animals in Kilmeade’s neighbourhood.

    • Nick Scroggs

      Hate to be a spoilsport, but that’s from 2009.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        and?

        • Nick Scroggs

          And what?

          • Carpe Vagenda

            Do you think he’s become less ignorant and vicious now that his white supremacist bullshit has been ‘validated’?

          • Nick Scroggs

            No, i just think we should avoid posting clips from 8 years ago without context, lest we become more like James O’Keefe blowers on Breitbart. F**k Brian Kilmeade.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            Oh, I’m sorry. I thought you had a point.

            Don’t let me interrupt you.

      • Shanzgood

        That’s not old for them.

      • Given our recent troll thought American was a race …

        • Nick Scroggs

          Good point.

    • Sister the Resister

      Good. Fucking. Lord.

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    BEST BUMPER STICKER EVER!!!!!!

    “One out of three Trump supporters is just as stupid as the other two.”

    OMG, I love this bumper sticker so much that I want to take it out behind the bleachers and get it pregnant.

    • TJ Barke

      Okay, Tracy.

    • Shanzgood

      I love it more. I want to have its abortion.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        I seriously love this so hard, you have no idea. I’ve wanted to come up with a bumper sticker that totally summed up the idiocy of Trump supporters, and this one hit the nail on the head over and over.

  • Jeffocaster in the desert

    You know muslin is one of my favorite types of cloth. If he bans it can we have hemp as a substitute.

    • Liberoid Ron

      Linen IS nicer than cotton. I say go for it.

      • Panika MCD

        Lenin is even moar better!

    • Panika MCD

      you stoners are all alike. you just want to get high off your clothes.

      • wavicles

        Close; I like get high and take off my clothes.

        • Panika MCD

          that works for all sorts of drugs and just being in the non-comments section of Wonkette.

  • Nick Scroggs

    Well, here’s the letter I just sent to the Donald: To President Bloatfish, I have an idea for how to create the border wall you want to erect. I think I’ve got it figured out: 60 feet tall, barbed electrified wires, automated sentry guns every 15 feet, tank cannons with depleted uranium rounds, traps that lead into rotating knives and a blood disposal tunnel, computerized sentries that automatically exterminate all non-Anglo people via genetic “radar”, and while they’re at it, a no-man’s-land extending several miles out form each side f the all except for checkpoints. And to make sure it’s a no-man’s-land, a regular spray every week of toxic chemicals and radiological materials, to ensure no human, animals, or plants can even get close to the wall or live near the US whatsoever. And if any creatures like jaguars or rabbits or anything come within a few miles, UAV drones would blast them the fuck into oblivion. And people will thank you in 30 years when expeditions into the wasteland that used to be America and find that the chaos inside was contained by the wall.
    You’re welcome.
    Signed, Nicholas Scroggs, Esq. (I’m not really a lawyer, but they don’t know that)

    • Panika MCD

      you can do that for $2.6 billion?

      • Nick Scroggs

        Well, doesn’t say the wall has to be made of strong material, does it?

        • Panika MCD

          the RFD also specifies that they only have $2.6 billion contributed to it. now, a good proposal would include some very creative math and then up the price later like everything else built in this country.

          • Nick Scroggs

            It was a joke proposal by the way, I’m not trying to be a jerk,just wanted to point that out.

          • Panika MCD

            I knew that it was a joke. I thought you could extend it by ‘splainin’ your evil plans to control costs.

          • Nick Scroggs

            Oh. I actually didn’t think that far on it.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    It’s your last chance. Brad, the White House intern, has sent this:

    “The White House Easter Egg Roll is a timeless White House tradition, dating back to 1878 and the presidency of President Rutherford B. Hayes. President Donald J. Trump and First Lady Melania Trump are honored to continue the traditions of the past, while weaving new traditions into the fabric of our Nation’s history.

    The 139th White House Easter Egg Roll will be held on April 17, 2017, on the South Lawn of the White House. It will be a fun-filled day for the whole family, filled with live entertainment, and, of course, the traditional rolling of the Easter eggs!

    Tomorrow, March 18th, is the LAST DAY to enter the lottery for your chance to attend. Visit recreation.gov now to enter the lottery.”

    The only lottery I wouldn’t want to win.

  • Rick Hill
    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      I was going to go with, “You are a fucking loon.”

      • Rick Hill

        Yeah but it’s only funny if it’s a made up remark to go with the expression

      • WomanInThePersistence

        I was thinking more “What is WRONG with you?”

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Du bist ein fucking loon.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      Ach du lieber! Was zum Teufel ist mit dir los?

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Verdammter Teppichfresser.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Und Teppichträger, auch.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Ich, für einen, begrüße unsere neuen arischen Oberherren.

  • BosGrl
  • Scrofula

    I see I missed a troll responding two hours ago.
    Looks like its gone, though. Did I miss any drama, or did it just shit ‘n scoot?

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Oh darnit, I missed it too.

    • Panika MCD

      I was here 2 hours ago. did I miss it too?

    • Nick Scroggs

      Who was the troll, was it that guy with the Michigan portrait?

      • Scrofula

        Flaming sword of righteousness in its portrait.

        • Nick Scroggs

          No I missed that.

    • Sister the Resister

      was it the one with the glowing cross for an avatar, and some comment about Muslim Obama and the Clinton Cartel?

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Well now I have to go check it out.

      • Scrofula

        Yup, gleaming cross in his avatar, irony-free apparently.

        • Sister the Resister

          Ok, Disqus did a crashy thing, so I never got back to that subthread. I’ll have to go find it.

    • Shucky Ducky

      He put up a bit of a fight. He’s “published” so we were supposed to RESPECT HIS AUTHORITAH! He must have had a bump in his Wheaties this am–he was also spouting his xtian crazy on The Hill and Media Matters. But no one was buying his bullshit.

      • Shanzgood

        He was trying to convert people to Christianity. Pft.

        • Shucky Ducky

          “Christianity”

        • WomanInThePersistence

          Here? Seriously?

        • Jack Tenhet

          I tried that xtianity thing once. I got better.

          • Shanzgood

            I’m a 2nd generation atheist raising a 3rd generation. Feels like being from a different planet sometimes.

          • Jack Tenhet

            The best people I know are atheists. The worst people I ever knew were pentecostals.

      • Panika MCD

        self publishing doesn’t count!

        • Scrofula

          Do acknowledgements in published articles count?

          • Shucky Ducky

            Hey, I’m proud of that!

          • Scrofula

            So am I! Just like how I’m an author on an abstract in the Chinese Journal of Blood Transfusion. I almost even put it in my CV!

          • Shucky Ducky

            One of my students wrote a great article about UNESCO for the law librarian journal and thanked me–it’s like I pushed that babby out myself!

          • Jack Tenhet

            Yes, those count.

          • Scrofula

            Yay!
            Cooperative interactions between pairs of homologous chromatids during meiosis in Saccharomyces cerevisiae.
            Mell JC, Komachi K, Hughes O, Burgess S.
            Genetics. 2008 Jun;179(2):1125-7
            Behold my authoritah! Somewhere in that paper!

          • Jack Tenhet

            Whoa! I am very impressed with this. My creds are just making up things with nothing but willing suspension of disbelief to worry about. You’re an actual scholar and I bow to you. Not being snarky at all, it’s hard to tell tone in this format.

          • Cool, here’s one of my (very) old ones:

            Amoscanate as a topically applied chemical for prophylaxis against Schistosoma mansoni infections in mice.

            Greene LK, Grenan MM, Davidson DE Jr, Jones DH, Shedd TR. Am J Trop Med Hyg. 1983 Nov;32(6):1356-63.

          • Panika MCD

            give me an example.

          • Scrofula

            I linked one below; an article from my old lab published in Genetics, where I was kindly mentioned for doing I don’t remember what.

          • Panika MCD

            well, that’s being counted as a co-author or the author of another research paper, so it obviously counts.

        • Shucky Ducky

          He probably considers himself a “recording artist” because he filmed himself doing karaoke.

    • Martini Ambassador

      Meh, you missed a bible-thumping white supremacist promoting his “scholarly work,” which was basically some nutbag letter-to-the-editor thing in some tinhorn local newspaper. But he did tell us how he was in touch with 41 Nobel scholars, so that was something.

      • Jack Tenhet

        So all it takes to have authoritah is to be published? I’ve had a couple of horror shorts published in my time, have had three letters to the editor about the corruption of the Gov. of Alabama. Guy Hunt at the time, when I was younger and there are still two op eds I wrote for the DNC floating around of DU. They were old and badly written, but they’re still there.

        That said, I have no authoritah at all on pretty much all things. Screw that guy with votes.

        • wavicles

          Well, I’ve written over 2300 comments on Disqus with over 3700 upvotes. That’s all like ‘peer-reviewed’ n’stuff, right?

          • Jack Tenhet

            Yeah, that should count as well.

      • Begin Anew Day

        Was he using Ms. Cleo to get in touch with those 41 dead Nobel scholars?

        That could be his problem right there.

    • Begin Anew Day

      They scamper when the A-team shows up.

  • Msgr_MΩment
    • Nick Scroggs

      Unless the French somehow get there first.

    • Shucky Ducky

      Damp Bint 2020!

      • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

        Watery Bints FTW!

      • Jack Tenhet

        Watery Tart 2020

    • I like it. Trump would try to grab her by the pussy and loose a hand.

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Make Camelot Great Again!

      • Scrofula

        JFK’s corpse 2020!

      • natoslug

        I am still nursing a hangover, and read that as “Make Cameltoe Great Again.”

        • Résistance Land Shark Ω

          “That too!”

  • Carpe Vagenda

    and, Tucker Carlson is publishing VDare material now. Fox’ new populist has a limited definition of “people”

    https://twitter.com/mmfa/status/843209147730595840

    • yyyaz

      Fuckerson of Carl gives meaning to the definition of “limited people.”

  • Paperless Tiger

    It would be nice to think that Republican judges would actually decide a case on the merits, but I kinda lost that illusion when they started pulling ‘corporate persons’ out their ass.

    • Scrofula

      Not to defend them, but that goes WAY back. I think it just meant you treat a Corp like an entity for legal purposes; doesn’t mean they have “speech rights” though.

    • Panika MCD

      nah, but they’ll certainly look at the self-interest in this one.

  • Shibusa

    Heh-heh: Palm Beach Mayor Says They May Have to Raise Taxes to Pay for President Trump’s Mar-a-Lago Visits

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Couldn’t happen to a nicer racist gated community.

      • eyelashviper

        The whole country will end up paying, and it is a Dem stronghold, lotsa nice people outside of the 1 %.

        • Carpe Vagenda

          We’re talking about the same city? Although it’d be nice if Bedford had to raise taxes so Susan Sarandon would take a hit in all this.

          https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/63399be1251a179d52459c3d20189783d71faff06027d0948e493152c7f5e20b.jpg

          • eyelashviper

            Palm Beach is separate from West Palm Beach and the other muncipalities of the county, and everyone there is being adversely impacted by the Shitgibbon’s regular visits, and some businesses are being ruined. The airport is a mess everytime he comes, and traffic is screwed up for hours, along with any biz affiliated with the airport. So far, the county is going into debt to cover expenses for his fun and games.

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            Why is everyone so selfish? Doesn’t everyone realize that Trump needs a WEEKLY vacation?

          • Villago Delenda Est

            All that TV watching and twittering is exhausting.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            Ah, so it’s not just the island getting hit? Because tbh I’d be OK with that, given that they used this thing as a pretext to impose a sunset rule.

    • BoziSpicer

      Probably raise the sales tax so that “everybody” pays their fair share.

  • Sister the Resister

    Somewhere, in an parallel universe…
    HillaryBeatTrump: Canada-Mexico overpass put on hold

  • eyelashviper

    Haven’t seen this reported in the US, but this from Canada, and we will never see the bottom of the barrel that the Evil Bastad in the WH (which one, take yer pick…tRump, Bannon, et al)…
    Despite world wide attempts to stop conflict mining in Africa, Guess Who wants to roll back regulations and allow more carnage and destruction in African countries…??

    http://www.cbc.ca/news/world/trump-conflict-minerals-congo-1.4025968

    • yyyaz

      So his thieving family can buy more diamonds by not paying for them. “Winning!”

      • eyelashviper

        Diamonds, gold, anything that can be dug out of the ground by near slave labor, and the environment destroyed…

        • yyyaz

          Double, triple “winning”!!11!

      • ariel_gee_398

        This will drive down prices, so that when his family rips off a jeweler, the jeweler loses less money. He’s helping the economy.

    • Panika MCD

      of course he does!

    • Zyxomma

      Thanks for posting. Shared.

    • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

      Human misery? Pfffft! There’s MONEY to be made!!

    • jaspersdad

      “Children are dying.”

      Lull nodded. “That’s a succinct summary of humankind, I’d say. Who needs tomes and volumes of history? Children are dying. The injustices of the world hide in those three words.”

      -Steven Erickson….Deadhouse Gates

  • aktlib101

    Why, why the fuck is this allowed?
    “Business is booming for the Entrepreneur-in-Chief Trump — and that’s suspicious”
    Suspicious? How about unacceptable.
    http://www.rawstory.com/2017/03/business-is-booming-for-the-entrepreneur-in-chief-trump-and-thats-suspicious/

    • Scrofula

      Or “billionaire” promises to sell and divest and not profit after taking office does none of those things, is straight-up and clearly breaking the law, should be removed from office, Russians or not.

      • aktlib101

        Where is Congress in all of this? Where are the Courts? Why isn’t anyone suing Grifter in Chief on behalf of us all?

        • yyyaz

          Repugnacunts?

        • Scrofula

          Congress is doing its partisan thing, and the suits ARE in the works, but not easy, I guess.

    • Panika MCD

      can you find me a more credible link?

      • aktlib101
        • Panika MCD

          you’re awesome!

      • Shucky Ducky

        Sincere question–I understand that they’re click-baity and partisan, but do they concoct “fake news”? I check the website daily and would prefer to think they’re biased rather than out-and-out lying.

        • Jack Tenhet

          I like Raw Story myself. I mean, yeah, they’re biased but so am I. I’ve never seen them just make up stuff. Everything seems to track with stuff in the Post and The Times.

        • Panika MCD

          a lot of times: yes. their headlines are often misleading and if you follow the links, you usually find the truth. sometimes that truth should piss a person off, but because it’s not near as objectionable than RawStory made it out to be, a lot of readers will say, “A pox on both your houses!” and ignore the subject entirely.

          there was a story about a state updating it’s animal cruelty laws and RawStory said they were adding back in sodomy laws. turned out that the author was merely not x-ing out that portion in existing law because he didn’t want to politicize the bill and the sentence fragment in question had already been struck down in federal court. furthermore, the bill’s author said he would support legislation that removed all unconstitutional laws from their books, but he just wanted to protect animals with the bill. Human Rights Campaign supported the bill and Raw Story made it out to be an anti-LGBT bill. that was shared here and I was the only person to go find the real story.

          so, if you’re going to post links from stories that they altered you to, it’d be awesome if you followed the links to the real story and shared that. we can’t call them sharers of fake news if we’re not going to do our homework.

          • Shucky Ducky

            I really appreciate your response. It sounds to me like you are holding them to a very high standard given our current media climate, but at the same time because of your post I will not be linking to Raw Story posts when I’m commenting on the internet. Thanks for giving good feedback!

          • Panika MCD

            I think it’s fine to use it as a resource, but it’s a good idea to follow the links before sharing. I don’t think that’s a very high standard. but you’re welcome.

      • bupkus23

        That Raw Story piece is a reprint of a ( Newark, NJ?) Star-Ledger editorial:

        Link: http://www.nj.com/opinion/index.ssf/2017/03/business_booming_for_the_entrepreneur-in-chief_tru.html

        • Panika MCD

          statewide, but HQ is in Iselin.

  • This morning I saw that senior member of Trump’s campaign in Oklahoma has been charged with three felony counts of child prostitution and I started thinking (always dangerous) that almost everything that Trump or the trumpanzees have accused Clinton or Obama of doing turns out to be something that a trumpanzee is guilty of doing. So how long will it be before we get some evidence that the Trump campaign wire tapped someone in the Clinton campaign, or had the Russian secret service do it for them?

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Projection. Always.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      A week on the outside, maybe two?

    • Scrofula

      So where was Trump REALLY born?
      Or is he projecting over how he wasn’t “born” at all, but rather “hatched”.

      • TJ Barke

        I think he congealed.

        • Scrofula

          Somebody should blast him with some Simple Green.

          • TJ Barke

            Not strong enough.

          • yyyaz

            60% H2O2 would work.

          • Scrofula

            Non aqueous, cause now we’re getting to rocket fuel.

          • yyyaz

            ; )

          • Scrofula

            He’s sort of a giant mass of keratin. Drain cleaner works on that.

          • How about some roundup? He likes large corporations.

          • Jack Tenhet

            And with Roundup, there’s the whole possibility of cancer (from votes).

        • Shucky Ducky
          • yyyaz

            ZOMFG, the dreaded green-jello salad, the bane of every 10-year-old who ended up at the back of the line at every church potluck dinner ever.

          • Shucky Ducky

            Sorry, we’re all out of fried chicken and mac and cheese. Here–have some gelled Dampnut. It’s good for you1

          • JustDon’tSayMicrowave

            Can’t upvote cuz yuck. Why was that stuff EVER a thing?

      • snark-lurker

        he was crapped

    • Carpe Vagenda

      or had the Russian secret service FBI do it for them?

      October.

    • Panika MCD

      I didn’t know the fucker was involved in the campaign (though I suspected he was a public supporter)–this is going to be fun!

      • A family values republican found in a hotel room with a 17 year old male prostitute and drugs. Can’t get much more hypocritical (and Trump-like) than that.

        • IOnlyLikeCats

          That poor young man. Aren’t there laws to protect and help him Republicans are trying to get rid of?

        • Panika MCD

          yes, I saw that part of the story. I didn’t know the guy was on Trump’s OK Campaign Committee. that’s the part that’s going to make it art!

    • Panika MCD

      any argument they make usually leads back to, “we’re doing it, so everyone else must be!!!” it’s amazing.

    • Jack Tenhet

      He did openly ask he Russians to hack HRC at one of his rallies. I distinctly remember that because it was so damned illegal and nobody’s saying anything about that even with all this Russian collusion coming out.

      • yyyaz

        Hey, it was a “joke.”

        • Jack Tenhet

          Everything he says is a joke until it’s not a joke, then he meant that, but not the part in quotes, that was a joke, but that still needs to be seriously investigated as though it weren’t a joke but it was a joke but not a joke because FAKE NEWS!!! SHUT UP!!! Wait, come back and film me because I need you guys!

          • yyyaz

            Easy for you to say.

          • Jack Tenhet

            No, that was actually very hard. That’s a third draft you’re looking at there. I think all the spin broke my Wordperfect.

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      But of course! Everything Trump says is about himself. I don’t know why the media hasn’t seen this utterly obvious fact yet!

      • Begin Anew Day

        The media see an obvious fact? They gushed over the Taco Bowl tweet!
        They always present donnie’s rhetoric as credible and worth reporting.

        Only AFTER his election was it noticed by a slim few media people that donnie tells an occasional fib.

        The media, in general, helped donnie far more than they helped Ms. Clinton.

        Fuck those guys.

    • BoatOfVelociraptors

      Trump is actually known for spying on the guests of his properties…
      https://www.buzzfeed.com/aramroston/sources-donald-trump-listened-in-on-phone-lines-at-mar-a-lag

      He’s literally tapped his own self. Of course it’s projection.

      • I forgot about that story. LOL

        • BosGrl

          So did the media, apparently.

      • IOnlyLikeCats

        It’s like shady “love hotels” (which I only know about because sometimes manga series become about sex WITH NO WARNING WHY sorry that was off-topic)… Do the rooms charge by the hour?

        • Some places they do. I remember during the taxi ride from the airport to Fort Sam Houston passing several motels that advertised their rooms “by the hour.” There was a big scandal a back in the 90’s about some hotels in the Poconos. Apparently, you could rent porn films on one of their channels, and one couple was shocked to see a honeymoon video. Of themselves.

    • tomamitai

      Hey, he was diddling the yute in a motel room so that’s not so bad. Now if it had been in the basement of a pizza parlor, that would’ve been outta line!

  • Rick Hill
  • BosGrl

    I promised my therapist I would stay away from news and headlines this weekend, but so far I’ve failed.

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      I know, it’s insane, isn’t it? Even if I try to look at it as an addiction, and make rules for myself, it’s impossible.

    • tapp_my_wire,please

      Just call it a one-time Freudian slip up.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Cone of Shame for you, girl.

      • BosGrl

        I know. I ate carbs, too. Angela Merkel is going to chastise me.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          For your penance, do 10 snarky comments and make one dick joke.

    • Begin Anew Day

      You should try my therapist. His name is Doctor Zoom and he treats his patients with telepathic waves that emanate from the Wonkette website.

      Worth every damn penny you pay.

    • vivian

      This just in:
      YOU”RE DOING GREAT! THE WARM EMBRACE OF LIKE_MINDED WONKETEERS WILL SERVE YOU WELL!

  • Carpe Vagenda

    Hey, the DNC is maybe going to look like America after all.

    https://twitter.com/kalisakai/status/843218256328503296

    • IOnlyLikeCats

      They should definitely ask Hillary for tips.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        They should. It seems likely that they won’t, even though she turned out to be pretty good at being voted for.

  • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

    I mean, I actually like Eileen Fisher, myself, but, er, isn’t this just a teensy-weensy bit on the Auschwitz-y side, even for her?https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7dbe03ea77f869436d9b036d29cc32d51dbafddae0d1435ede56a1a65e0af2bf.jpg

    • BosGrl

      yes

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      Bathing suit cover up maybe?

    • Yr. Gma

      It looks like a nightgown, but I see your point.

    • Shucky Ducky

      I can’t see from the pic, but I really hope that model has hair.

      • Scrofula

        She’s got a tattoo too.

    • aktlib101

      Actually, a perfect outfit for Republican women in Trump’s America. Picture should include couple of pots and pans and a crying brat in the background. Perfect. Oh, and barefoot.

    • Yr. Gma

      About $200.00, right?

    • IOnlyLikeCats

      Designers should stay away from stripes that color in general for that reason and most of them are aware of that. I don’t know how they thought this was OK.

    • tapp_my_wire,please

      Agree. The stripes are slimming. A look the camper’s were too familiar with.

    • yyyaz

      Why do you hate the Storm Troops?

    • Husband Of Mrs God

      This and the commentary below, priceless.

    • Husband Of Mrs God

      This dress would be right at home here:
      http://barbiedeathcamp.com/
      I was on the fence about this, then Mrs God approved.

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      My best friend said “Something to slip on after the shower”

    • Shucky Ducky

      Angela wouldn’t touch that worm with a 87 mile fortified wall.

      • Résistance Land Shark Ω

        Assuming she could find it.

      • Where is my fishhook when I need it?

        • Scrofula

          That’s weird, the fish refuse to bite!

    • Husband Of Mrs God

      Awww.

    • vivian

      “Why did you strangle the kittens, Donald?”

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω

    From aktlib101’s non-comment below:
    Where is Congress in all of this? Where are the Courts? Why isn’t anyone suing Grifter in Chief on behalf of us all?

    I suppose the republicans in Congress thought they would have more time and get more of their agenda passed before they pushed Nookular Impeachment™ button. But with the AHCA flaming out and Ryan’s bullshit budget in a flat spin, I would suspect that the discussions are now moving ahead for the impeachment process.

    The republicans must be beginning to realize that if they keep Donnie Dumbass in place too much longer, the whole country will fold. Our allies are doing “talk to the hand” with the US, and more bad information is leaking. Even the media has gotten their cojones off the shelf.

    How much longer can they wait before the whole thing collapses?

    • OrG

      Well,they are stupid.And evil too,so who knows?

      • Résistance Land Shark Ω

        Evil, yes. But all of them are not stupid enough to risk their phoney-baloney jobs. Donnie is dragging them ALL down with him, and they’ll do ANYTHING to keep that sweet, sweet congresscritter grift going.

        • yyyaz

          As long as they are gerrymandered into safe districts for Congress and continue to dominate state leges, I don’t see more than a handful at most caving. They are trying to shoot the moon, so it is all or nothing.

    • snark-lurker

      they just might take this all the way down cuz they are that fuckin blinded by $$$

      • aktlib101

        Unfortunately, yes, $$$ = the main problem

        • yyyaz

          I wanted to snark that tax cuts will fix that, but my soul will not allow it.

    • Husband Of Mrs God

      My worry is, does enough of it collapse?
      Cheetoh goes, is Pence then theocrat-in-chief? Does he keep the Nazi ministers in the White House? Is someone building oppo against him?
      Might be necessary, Indivisible etc, to dig in and siege until moderation prevails. Or something. Got to turn the RW horde against.

      • Lord Jim

        My feeling is that the Republican establishment will certainly oust Bannon. They would prefer to have Pence under their own control.

      • shivaskeeper

        If he gets impeached the next in line would get to pick a new Cabinet. He could ask whoever is there to stay on or fire them. It would effectively be the same as if a new election happened. The new President would not be forced to work with the old Cabinet if he didn’t want to.

    • shivaskeeper

      They were stupid if they thought anything would get done on a fast timeline. I mean unforgivably stupid. Government doesn’t work all that fast. Any bill has to be reconciled in the House and the Senate before it gets signed. I don’t think anything has gone close to that far yet.

      They put party and money over country. They have had a platform based on lies, fear, hate, and obstruction for so long it’s all become habit for them. DJT is just the end state of what they have been selling for years.

      They are being forced to govern and it’s not going to work for then as the habits are too hard to break. They still peddle all the lies, fear, and hate they can and now the Tea Party, who have been rewarded for not compromising on anything, will not compromise with the rest of the GOP. There is no more scary black man to blame for them utterly failing to govern.

      Eventually they will get rid of him and blame him for their inability to govern. Hopefully the damage to their party will be too great to recover from for a generation or two.

      • Résistance Land Shark Ω

        If they’re trying to shoot the moon, I think their aim is way off.

        The damage will have to massive for this to happen. And the citizens will have to beat plowshares into votes, beat them with them, and salt the earth.

        • shivaskeeper

          Pretty much.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨
  • Carpe Vagenda
    • BosGrl

      Oh damn. The man that preached kindness and acceptance must be turning in his grave.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        He was also a Christian minister who preached acceptance and pluralism, so yeah, probably.

        • Villago Delenda Est

          An actual Christian, nothing like Jerry Falwell or Franklin Graham or Benny Hinn or Pat Robertson or Joel Osteen…Mammonists all.

      • shivaskeeper

        The best lesson Mr Rogers taught was to look for the helpers. That no matter what bad things were happening to look for the people trying to help because they WILL be there.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨
  • mancityRed6

    maybe I’m just asking too much
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_OnFHJou4o

  • Michael R

    … Here’s some good news

    A new poll says that the majority of Americans between the ages of 18 and 30 view Donald Trump as an “illegitimate president,” according to TheHill.com.

    A meager 22 percent of young adults approve of the president’s job performance with 62 percent disapproving.

    ( Which means they have to be up and voting next election , something to focus on . )

    http://www.rawstory.com/2017/03/majority-of-young-adults-in-us-view-trumps-presidency-as-illegitimate-poll/

    • IOnlyLikeCats

      The first part, Daisy or myself could have told you.

      • Shucky Ducky

        WHERE THE FUCK IS DAISY?!?

        • IOnlyLikeCats

          I keep her in a glass case and she hasn’t noticed yet because of her schoolwork and access to boba tea and the movie theater.

          • So basically y’all will be the subject of a stalker movie on netflix in a year or so?

          • Shucky Ducky

            What about the boy? Do you allow some privileges? No I take that back–I’m afraid that the boy and politics and school are keeping her from us. She needs to get her priorities straight.

    • Yes, it does mean they have to get out to vote this year, next year, and so on. For the past 8+ years I’ve been telling a lot of young people that it doesn’t matter how many protest marches you were at, how many petitions you signed, and how important some cause is to you. Tell me how you voted, and that will tell me how important it was to you. Since a distressing majority of them say they didn’t vote, they get upset when I tell them that “well, I guess (issue) wasn’t that important to you.”

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

    I’m beginning to suspect Trump’s claims about President Obama’s birth certificate might not be true.

    • snark-lurker

      *GASP!*

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      Fetch the fainting couch and clutching pearls!

    • When his “crack team of investigators” came back from Hawaii without anything beyond a good tan, I sort of wondered…

      • Msgr_MΩment

        You misspelled “crack pipe”.

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        I thought they were still there

    • OrG

      INVESTIGATE!

  • aktlib101

    The Guardian: What is it with Trump and handshakes? This is getting awkward:
    “Trump’s idea of finding common ground with Angela Merkel was by repeating the bizarre allegation that he too had been spied upon by Barack Obama. (The NSA had been tapping Merkel’s cell phone for years.) Put another way, Merkel came to the United States to talk about the roles of the US and Germany to each other and in the world. Trump received her to talk about himself.”
    “It can be amusing to ridicule the strange spectacles surrounding Trump’s handshakes, but behind these weird anti-diplomatic pantomimes lies an ominous reality coming clearer into view. His is a government that not only downplays cooperation with others but also believes money is better spent preparing for war than keeping the peace. That grim reality leaves me shaking my head.”
    https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/mar/18/trump-handshakes-angela-merkel-awkward

    • Scrofula

      You didn’t see that coming, Mr. Guardian Person? The rest of us have been doing a lot more than shake our heads.

  • tomamitai
    • Msgr_MΩment

      Died in the arms of a 13 year old or GTFO Dayum. The King of Rock n Roll. R.I.P.

    • Nick Scroggs

      Son of a motherfucker. Damn you universe.

    • snark-lurker

      he be up behind the evergreens now

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Go! Go, Chuckie, go!
        Go…. Chuckie be great.

        • snark-lurker

          here’s to vinyl forever

    • OrG

      Well,I know what I’ll be listening to.

    • SayItWithWookies
    • Villago Delenda Est

      One of the greats.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω
  • Amelia

    Dianne Feinstein said at a a Q&A, after being asked how we could get Trump out, that she suspected he would “get himself out.”

    This is both frustrating (because, hello, Congress could help us out here) and suuuuper interesting considering her meeting with Comey the other day. What does she knoooow?

    • snark-lurker

      very little or she would not hold it so close to the vest

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      RawStory said she meant that he would resign, but to me she seemed to be implying that what he was up to was so egregious that it was inevitable that he’d be gone one way or another eventually.

      • yyyaz

        When events overtake institutions’ slow reaction times — which they have — eventually is a non-viable option.

      • Amelia

        I had the same thought, but couldn’t decide if it was me reading into her words or my own intense hatred adding a little extra flavor.

    • shivaskeeper

      All I took from it was no one was going to do anything. Her language was so vague it could mean anything.

      He resigns because the pressure is too great, he resigns ahead of any investigation and impeachment, he gets himself out when his term is up, he crashes everything and burns all the institutions of government to the ground and there is no more work for him to too, he gets pulled to the side and told it’s time to go or he goes to jail, he see his brand collapsing and gets out so as to salvage something, his kids force him to resign as they see the brand collapsing and want to salvage all the money they can.

      Whichever one is your preferred narrative fits into “get himself out”. What doesn’t fit into it is, “Congress is on it and we are looking into things in a nonpartisan fashion with the help of the relevant justice and investigatory agencies and we are weighing options for a course of action.”

    • theCryptofishist

      So, how much do we trust her anyway?

      • Amelia

        Based on her voting record, less than a lot of Dems, but more than anyone with an R after their name. *shrug* Hard to know.

        • theCryptofishist

          I’ve given her the side eye since she ended a needle exchange program while she was mayor. And her husband was all poised to make money from devolved post offices. Of course, she did get that torture report made public…

    • Chyron HR

      “Congress could help us out here”

      Wouldn’t it be nice if the people who want Trump out had bothered to give the opposition party a congressional majority? Oh, but that would have meant voting for the lesser of two evils, and also the country needed to be punished for not accepting Bernie as their lord and savior, so it can’t be helped.

      • Amelia

        If only. Sigh.

  • mancityRed6
  • aktlib101

    Heh, about that “Fake Freedom of American Health Care” under Little Shitler:
    “Eight years ago I moved to the United States from Finland, which like all the Nordic nations is a wealthy capitalist economy, despite the stereotypes you may have heard. And like all those countries, Finland has invested in a universal, taxpayer-funded and publicly managed health care system. Finns constantly debate the shortcomings of their system and are working to improve it, but in Finland I never worried about where my medical care came from or whether I could afford it. I paid my income taxes — which, again despite the stereotypes, were about the same as what I pay in federal, state and local income taxes in New York City — and if I needed to see a doctor, I had several options.”
    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/03/18/opinion/the-fake-freedom-of-american-health-care.html?action=click&pgtype=Homepage&clickSource=story-heading&module=opinion-c-col-left-region&region=opinion-c-col-left-region&WT.nav=opinion-c-col-left-region

    • Scrofula

      I heard Finland’s pitch for tourism was, seriously, “enjoy the silence.”

      • Jack Tenhet

        Words like violence?

        • theCryptofishist

          Just don’t go on the “Winter War with Cocktails” tour and you’ll be fine.

    • Shanzgood

      Same when I lived in the U.K. What this quote (I haven’t read the whole article) doesn’t mention is that for about the same amount of taxes YOU ARE GETTING NATIONAL HEALTHCARE. You are not also paying huge premiums and out of pocket expenses for coverage you might be denied or kicked off of permanently with no recourse for getting it back because of a pre-existing condition.

      • Scrofula

        Single payer would reduce costs across the board. But GUBMIT!! FREEDOM!! Freedom in rural areas where there’s only one option anyway.
        (And my sister got sick and went to the ER while she was in the UK (or A&E, whatever they call it); no bill for a foreigner either. Just a visit and some IV fluids would be $4k minimum here.)

        • aktlib101

          Socialism…the horrors

          • yyyaz

            Maybe if we called it Public Health Care…

          • aktlib101

            Patriot Health? Heh. Soaring Eagle Health?

          • yyyaz

            Seriously, I am in favor of any rebranding that will get through the thick skulls of freepers and fraidies who keep fucking all of us.

          • Lord Jim

            iCare® by Apple

        • Villago Delenda Est

          Unless you are committed to the zero sum game on everything, of course it makes sense. But the GOP thinks (very fucking stupidly) that everything is zero sum. They don’t understand how preventative, regular health care starting with birth avoids huge costs down the road, and furthermore (and this may well be a rub with them, too) leads to people having one less thing to worry about, lowering stress across the entire society, but those who live for power trips over their employees don’t like this because their appetites for cruelty and sadism are not fed.

          • aktlib101

            Sure, but the “huge costs down the road” come from the people and always end up in the pockets of insurance and/or pharma and/or hospitals, who charge whatever they like. Only us, in the entire industrialized world, are doing this

        • Resistance Fighter Astraea

          American’s favorite past time is passing judgment on whether their fellow citizens are worthy of things like health care. That’s why so many love charity-based services. If everyone gets basic services, then how can we make sure that the undeserving are punished with inescapable poverty?

          • Scrofula

            Ah, but it’s not like there’s a whole system to nickel-and-dime the poors in poorer-ness.
            We need to find something else for the rubes to hate. I’ll go with Chihuahuas. The breed should be exterminated anyway.

        • Truthiness2U

          It isn’t just rural areas that have no FREEDUMB!!1! with their healthcare. Most people get their health insurance through their employer, and most employers don’t offer a lot of choices. And in those plans, there are usually restrictions on what doctors you can do to, if you want to pay the insurance rate, not the out-of-pocket rate.

          I’m so fucking tired of this canard that ZOMG! freedom! choices! exists for people with non-Medicaid/Medicare/ACA insurance, because let me assure, it doesn’t.

          • Scrofula

            Yeah, I don’t get it. I just want to have a doctor. Why the hassle? I break my wrist, I go to the closest hospital. THAT is freedom, not carrying around a provider list in case I get in an accident.

    • yyyaz

      We are just preaching to our own choir with this. And have been for literal decades. See, “money ruins everything in politics,” below. Thanks, Merkin morans.

      • aktlib101

        True, we are a bit in our own bubble. We may be wrong on some things, from time to time, but there is no doubt that we are NOT wrong on the idea and benefits of universal healthcare.

        • Scrofula

          This forum is a bubble, but it’s not like we shut out info from the outside, disregard disagreement as FAKE!!!

      • theCryptofishist

        We have to find ways to reach the others.

    • Swampgas_Man

      The people we need to reach are those who think the NYT is Fake News and the National Enquirer is real.

      • yyyaz

        Exackitally. aktlib101 and I are kicking around new names that repugnacunts would have a hard time with screaming “socialisms!!1!!” at their marble-headed constituents to scare them.

        • Scrofula

          I noticed around here the solar panel folks (they’re everywhere!) started commercials about “sticking it to the man” and somehow got thousands of Trumpers to install what used to be hippie-dippie tree-hugging solar power. There’s like five houses just on my street.

          • theCryptofishist

            *giggles*

    • Scrofula

      Since everyone needs healthcare, I was thinking, what if we treated our municipal water like health care?
      You have to choose a provider during a certain month (for some reason I never understood), and if you like to shower in the morning, that’s a pre-existing condition. There are countless forms to fill out every time you run the tap, and some plans cover sinks but not toilets, or at least only toilets included in the plan. Showering can only last two minutes, with a $20 copay, after which it’s $2000/min.

      • vivian

        Shhhhh. Don’t give them any ideas.

        • yyyaz

          Here’s an idea: make public utilities actual public utilities, i.e., no stockholders.

          • Scrofula

            And then we can install fiber for internet access as a public utilty, which it’s becoming.

          • theCryptofishist

            And PG&E wont be trying to kill me any more.

          • Scrofula

            Hey, don’t piss off PG&E. You saw what they did to San Bruno.

          • theCryptofishist

            Yes, and I notice that they haven’t demonstrably stopped that sort of behavior.

      • RobKanC

        Good thing this is not Breitbart. Otherwise, the orange gibbon might actually use this idea.

      • aktlib101

        Heh, brilliant analogy

    • RobKanC

      But you see this is ‘Murica. And gubmint does not do anything right. Except Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid. But thats not the point. The point is, poor blah and broh ppl will also get healthcare. I will die, but atleast I will take some of those other ppl with me. Cos, this is ‘Murica baby. FReedumb!!!!

      • Scrofula

        Gubmit also real good at shooting bad brown guys far away, except when it’s your own kid’s boots on the ground.

        • RobKanC

          But thats the military not Gubmint though(dont ask how! wingnut logic, just roll with it). Military is good cos they have guns and they shoot broh ppl. Same with police, they shoot blah ppl.

  • Nick Scroggs
    • Msgr_MΩment
      • Jack Tenhet

        Tell Tchaikovsky the news!

    • OrG

      A little trivia: Unbelievably Chuck Berry’s only chart topper was My-Ding-A-Ling.

      • yyyaz

        Merkin septionalism.

      • Sheepshagger

        Hey that’s my chart topper too!

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Let it rock, people.
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=regrIkB8ets
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-5taaPYetYc
      who will white people steal from NOW?!!

      • Jack Tenhet

        Who will white people steal from now? Everybody, Katie. The circle of life continues unabated.

    • Jack Tenhet

      I just saw that on Rolling Stone. He’s dead yet Charles Manson still lives. Gawd hates us.

      • Yr. Gma

        At least Charlie is still behind bars.

  • Carpe Vagenda
    • Nick Scroggs

      What’s the song, cuz I don’t wanna click on Richard Spencer’s Twitter feed to open the link.

      • Scrofula

        Can’t tell, but here’s a link to the composer in question:
        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Kander

        • Nick Scroggs

          Thanks.

          • Scrofula

            The future belongs to us?
            Don’t know my musicals, not totally gay.

          • Nick Scroggs

            “Tomorrow Belongs To Me”, I think.

          • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

            FFS, I can’t take you anywhere.

          • Scrofula

            I saw “Rent” on actual Broadway.
            Jebus it was awful.

          • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

            I imagine. Musicals aren’t my thing, except a few old movie ones.

          • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

            “The Book of Mormon” is fantastic.

          • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

            You’re making a judgment from horrendous non-musical musicals, especially the vile Andrew Lloyd-Webber. That’s because the AIDS epidemic, thanks to St. Ronnie, killed off the entire next generation of talented composers and lyricists, and I’m not even exaggerating. There hasn’t been a good musical for decades–only now are they beginning to reappear, with The Book of Mormon and Hamilton.

            But real musicals are sensational–West Side Story, Guys and Dolls, Carousel, Oklahoma (seriously, go back and listen to it), The King and I, even A Chorus Line, and especially the Kander&Ebb musicals, Cabaret and Chicago in particular.

          • dlemex

            Didn’t see it but I can assure you that “Cats” was worse… Gawd awful.

          • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

            I can tell you the stormy bit in all the “Phantom of the Opera” ads is plagiarized from Ralph Vaughan Williams’ A London Symphony.

          • dlemex

            I got hooked on Les Miserables. I have seen it in London, NY, and SF. I hope to see it in Spanish someday.

          • Penny Dreadful Says Resist

            You take that back right now.

          • Scrofula

            I thought South Park had a good take: “Everyone has AIDS AIDS AIDS!”

          • Penny Dreadful Says Resist

            Well yeah, that was pretty much spot on. Still.

          • Kiri the Paid Protestor

            Tsk, tsk, tsk…

          • Villago Delenda Est

            It is from Cabaret, at least the film version.

      • Resistance Fighter Astraea

        Tomorrow Belongs to Me from Cabaret.

        • Nick Scroggs

          Thanks, I already found it.

    • Sheepshagger

      Can you imagine the mothers of those two kvetching with each other?

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Well, since Spencer’s mom lives off the wingnut welfare proceeds of her family’s racist business practices, maybe not so much? Unless you mean the gay uncles, iwc FUCK YEAH.

        • Sheepshagger

          I was meaning the Jewish uncles. “I mean their so sweet, and so talented, they keep a good home, but no babies it’s a tragedy Ruth ….”

          • Carpe Vagenda

            but their friends bring the best dishes to potlucks…

    • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

      HOWLS of derisive laughter Bruce Richard.

      https://youtu.be/cej1ISrVpvw

    • Nick Scroggs

      Yup, definitely this one. Same URL start. Which begs the question, “Why was Richard Spencer suing this in the first place?” Not that I already don’t know the answer. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=29Mg6Gfh9Co

    • ariel_gee_398

      I wouldn’t say that a dumb Nazi that gets punched in the head is the best kind of Nazi, but it’s certainly in the top five.

    • theCryptofishist

      Splendid.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        It made me happy.

    • Roni Raven, Just Microwavin’

      I just heard an interview with Spencer on NPR. He sounds gay. Not that there’s anything wrong with that per se, just whoa if true.

      Now i have to go stanch the blood coming from my ears. Later, wonkers.

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      JASON KANDER is from the Kander and Ebb Kanders? OH MY GOD I didn’t think I could love him more. What a perfect tweet. Have to go over there and retweet immediately.

      • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

        Totally did that and then tweeted to him directly. What a thing! And such a perfect, perfect tweet.

  • Jack Tenhet

    “He literally can’t grasp the importance of this moment. Not only was
    that move disrespectful to Merkel, it’s a much larger, and culturally
    broader, example of a powerful woman getting blown off by a many
    a powerful man. Or being degraded by a powerful man’s inability to share
    a common gesture of respect.”

    Cafe on he who shall not be named dissing Merkel.

    https://www.good.is/articles/trump-merkel-handshake

    • Sheepshagger

      Merkel was not degraded by trump. If anything she made him look like a puny bitch.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Agreed. She came across as the statesman (to gender twist that term), he’s still just a whiny bitch.

      • Jack Tenhet

        I didn’t see her as being degraded either, but in he who shall not be named’s pathology, he was degrading her. He does this to all women.

      • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

        He is a puny bitch. Sad and weak also too.

        • Kiri the Paid Protestor

          Puny president. Hulk smash with little finger. Hulk still bored, go to help Captain America find Nazis named Steve.

    • SeekingResistanceBarbie

      She’s a smart woman, smarter than he can possibly imagine or ever hope to be. She knows how that looked to the rest of the world. I am personally appalled and embarrassed.

    • Kiri the Paid Protestor

      The next world leader to shake Trumpy’s hand needs to do it with a fake rubber prop hand and a packet of stage blood up their sleeve. You can see where I’m going with this, right?

      • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

        How about with those raver oversized Micky Mouse gloves? Can you still get those?

  • Kiri the Paid Protestor
    • tapp_my_wire,please

      Roll Over Beethoven. Need to make room for one more.

  • Mary Sandoras
    • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

      To be leaked in 3, 2, 1 . . .

    • RobKanC

      Making Mike Pence look like a really good alternative might go down as GOP’s greatest ever sleight of hand.

      • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

        Pence might restore American standing to GWB levels, there’s that.

        • aktlib101

          Chimpy led us to the greatest Recession since the last Great Depression. Go RED, what’s next? The Yuuuge Depression?

          • Mary Sandoras

            Bigly and more terrific than the last one.

          • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

            Look, it’s still better than what’s going on now….

      • Mary Sandoras

        Pence is a snowflake. He gave a speech today in Florida pimping Trumpcare. Not to Joe Public, but to small business owners and government leaders.

  • aktlib101

    Funny Brits: “London Ridicules the Ridiculous”:
    “White House aides tried to calm the waters with incensed British officials, who said they had received assurances that the allegations would not be repeated. But no one speaks for Mr. Trump. On Friday, he stuck by his wiretapping charge — without disputing a Fox News commentator’s claim of British spy involvement — despite Republican leaders in Congress debunking his accusation, saying that intelligence investigators have found no evidence to back it.
    “Very soon,” Mr. Trump said in an interview on Wednesday night, the administration “will be submitting things” to Congress to prove his outrageous accusation.
    “What things? From what Alt-Right Tooth Fairy? Surely the nation — even Mr. Trump’s credulous base — is learning to recognize his dodges when he is cornered. “I think you’re going to find some very interesting items coming to the forefront over the next two weeks,” Mr. Trump promised, probably quite aware that he can always generate a different controversy by tweet when nothing he says comes true”
    Ladies and Gents, Your President. In his Orange beauty.
    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/03/17/opinion/london-ridicules-the-ridiculous.html?action=click&pgtype=Homepage&clickSource=story-heading&module=opinion-c-col-left-region&region=opinion-c-col-left-region&WT.nav=opinion-c-col-left-region

  • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

    Jimi plays Chuck:

    https://youtu.be/xlJclT1lMBk

  • Mary Sandoras
  • weejee

    Chuck’s heading to the ♪ Promised Land ♪

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Godspeed, poor boy, aka brown-eyed handsome man.

  • Nick Scroggs

    This is the song, that Richard Spencer took from Cabaret, put it on his Twitter and said “tomorrow belongs to us.” Anyone else feel absolutely ill? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=29Mg6Gfh9Co

    • weejee

      jawohl

      • Nick Scroggs

        Groan.

    • Idiokraticdrumpfenjugend

      I can’t speak for anyone else but I feel like taking a hike into the Sudetenland!

      • Nick Scroggs

        Just stay away form any beer halls, please.

    • Husband Of Mrs God

      Jeez, he is too subtle. Can’t figure this out.

    • TJ Barke

      Real Americans don’t vote for nazis, we shoot them. With votes…

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      He kind of missed the point of that scene, and the whole movie, don’t you think? Can you imagine this weakling dickweed if faced with a real SS officer?

      • Nick Scroggs

        He’d blow the SS officer?

        • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

          You’re so right.

    • Msgr_MΩment
    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      Anybody notice the old fart, who presumably was around for and fought in WWI, is having nothing to do with it?

  • Kiri the Paid Protestor
    • Msgr_MΩment
      • Husband Of Mrs God

        You don’t know how lucky you are, boys.
        Interesting version.

      • yyyaz

        Fuckwad Orange never listened to the Beatles. And this was written in tribute to Chucky B. I got to hear Sir Paul do it live once, and it still gives me goosebumps when I recall it. Thank you.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    The rump end of the Graham family media empire wants you to stop being mean to Van Jones

    https://twitter.com/mashable/status/842525159475023872

    • Shucky Ducky

      I worked on the Mr. Rogers archive while I was in library school. The man was LOVED. Not just as a personality–he was truly a great person.

      • Jack Tenhet

        Generations grew up watching him. I watched him relentlessly even into adulthood. It very literally broke my heart when he died. He was almost like family. A very genuinely decent man who did amazing things during times of difficulty and crisis.

        • Shucky Ducky

          Fred Rogers was a vegetarian who refused to eat anything that “ever had a mother”. I’m a voracious meat-eater, but that always struck me as a particularly wonderful Mr. Rogers sentiment.

        • MizzMazz

          I loved him too. I was just a little too old for Sesame Street when it came out, and Mr Rogers was next. I would be on the floor in front of the TV with my graham crackers and milk, and felt like somebody cared about me. Later, it became ‘cool’ to make fun of him, but I never could, he just made me feel loved.

        • Biff52

          I was a little bit too old to have watched him, but I remember this:
          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=riL7O0oUezs

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Oh, trust me. I loved him.

      • NastyBossetti

        That reminds me of that story where his car was stolen, and it was reported on the news, and the next day his car was back with a note on it saying something like, “Sorry, we didn’t know it was yours!”

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Apparently just the same in person. There’s a story about a kid approaching him once when he was dining at thw Moosewood in Ithaca, and he congratulated the child for how courageous it must have been tp approach him and say hello. As if he were a very scary person to approach.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      NOT CRYING. YOU’RE THE PUPPET.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Yeah, I probably am.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Needs moar whitewashing…. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=le51jB37Fro

    • RC

      Unlike most in my generation I loath the Beach Boys. Their shit all sounds the same to me and that’s coming from someone who loved The Eagles and Nickleback hahaha . I’ll take Chuck B any day.

    • weejee

      Whitewashed for sure. Beach Boys’ Pet Sounds had some unique stuff in it, but some of the early stuff was major ripoff.

  • Sheepshagger

    So….

    America basically has three alliance structures as I see it- NATO, with an extra focus on Britain and Germany , Anti communist Asia with a strong focus on South Korea and Japan and the Anglo Pacific ( for want of a better term). Trump has been pissing in NATOs cornflakes for decades and now he’s taking a dump on the conference table. His SoS sort of threatened a holocaust and then carsoned off to sleep on Korea. What are we going to get in Oz Nz next? What the fuck is this brain dead muppet up to? I mean Korea is at a very delicate pitch right now and they’re basically slinging a hand grenade into the room and booking. That business with Merkel and the GCHQ is just humiliating.

    • RobKanC

      The idea is to isolate the country from all sides and slowly dismantle the UN. Once the UN is done for, Russia can basically do anything they want with impunity. Trump does not care for any future stuff, being a puppet does not afford those luxuries.

      • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

        And NATO. Trump’s been doing Putin’s bidding on that front for months.

    • SeekingResistanceBarbie

      The trump administration’s perverted world view and gross incompetence and ignorance frightens me.

    • aktlib101

      Well, our Oligarchs and Russian Oligarchs want to remove all international rules and regulations, so they can grift free of any constraints

    • shivaskeeper

      You missed one major alliance. ABCA – America, Britain, Canada, Australia & New Zealand.

      • theCryptofishist

        Overlaps/includes “Anglo-Pacific.”

        • shivaskeeper

          It is a formal alliance though.

          • theCryptofishist

            Very well.

    • Dazza

      I love “carsoned off to sleep on Korea.” You must be fun to listen to in court. No snark.

      • Sheepshagger

        Too prolix. I’m working on it.

    • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

      There was that shouting and hanging up the phone thingey, I imagine they remember that.

  • ariel_gee_398
    • suziq

      Was that picture taken today? As in, he was playing golf again today? In Florida? Does he ever do any actual work?

      • Scrofula

        No, but it’s not like that’s a bad thing.
        Honestly, he’s done NOTHING since getting elected. Bannon just picked some truly horrendous cabinet appointments.

        • weejee

          Don’t golf, so are we sure that’s a golf glove and not a latex one for pulling things from something other than a water hazard.

          • Scrofula

            I’ve always thought he’s probably a really shitty golfer.
            Always talking through people’s swings, going really slow, taking mulligans or whatever they’re called.

          • weejee

            Cheating, like he does in business.

          • cmd resistor

            I read he cheats. Some e famous actor or basketball player said, but i forget who it was .

          • Jamoche

            http://www.latimes.com/sports/la-sp-sn-oscar-de-la-hoya-donald-trump-cheats-golf-20160503-story.html
            Oscar De La Hoya:

            “Another one to the water. Then the fourth ball he hits — I know it went to the bushes. But Donald, what he does, he tees off first so he can take off right away. I pipe mine down the middle. So we go off to our ball, and who do we see? Donald Trump, right in the middle of the fairway,” De La Hoya said.

            He quoted Trump saying, “By the way, I found my first ball, it’s right here.”

            “We’re like, ‘OK, yeah,’ we’re cracking up, not in front of his face,” De La Hoya said. “Then we go on to a par-3, 170 [yards]. There’s a big bush right between the tee and the green, so you can’t really see the green — you can see the flag, not the green. [Trump] hits and we just know it went out of bounds. We know it. He takes off.

            “We get up there [to the green] and he’s like, ‘Oh, my ball’s right here!’ Three feet away. ‘And by the way, I’m going to pick it up, it’s a gimme,’” De La Hoya said.

          • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

            Someone posted a video of him swinging at the driving range and he has a really terrible swing.

          • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

            That’s a golf glove. He does keep rubber gloves around for KaC to wear when he drops his phone in the toilet and she has to go in after it. He’s a gentleman, after all.

          • weejee

            zing

      • IOnlyLikeCats

        That’s the president’s job.

        • Husband Of Mrs God

          Which falls to Bannon.

          • IOnlyLikeCats

            Exactly.

        • suziq

          Momentarily confused. Can he just stay in Florida and play golf then? Maybe that will distract him enough to quit doing all the crazy shit he does.

          • Scrofula

            Isn’t that sort of what Eisenhower did? He seems to be fondly remembered (leaving out the whole H-bomb stuff).

          • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

            I’m pretty sure that the whole A and H bombs were under Truman. And Eisenhower, after overseeing the Allies ETO, and the successful vanquishing of the Nazis (giving full credit to the Russians as well), actually accomplished quite a bit as Presidnet, as I understand it. Mostly he spoke out fervently against the “military-industrial complex,” over and over.

            He also signed a Federal Highway bill, starting our Interstate system, an early version of a Civil Rights Bill (that Congress then brutally weakened), ended the war in Korea, as well as preventing us from being drawn into wars over the Suez Canal, Hungary, and others. He insisted that we must have peace rather than war, having seen it fully up close for years.

          • Scrofula

            I just meant that the nuclear arms race “exploded” under his tenure. FDR may have started it, Truman used it, and we had Sputnik nuclear paranoia under Ike (although JFK came closest to destroying the Earth).

          • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

            Well, we had that whole cold war. Sputnik wasn’t so much nuclear paranoia as generalized fear of Russian surveillance and also fury that they got there first.

      • Shibusa

        Trump’s laziness is profound.

    • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

      So he’s promoting his golf course at taxpayer expense again?

      • Jack Tenhet

        Of course he is. It’s a day that ends in “y”, isn’t it?

        Our days begin with “why?” and just keeps going until collapsing in a restless, haunted sleep.

        • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

          This has been a bad week for looking at the newspaper front section. I was doing OK for awhile.

          • Scrofula

            Earbuds crammed into my skull at work, playing non-political lectures for eight hours. Helps.

        • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

          Well, for me it begins with “why?”, followed by some number of “WTF!!???s”, followed by a “FUCK IT!!!”, sometimes, two of those. Then I collapse and sleep much like you described.

      • snark-lurker

        donut act so surprised

    • Reximus

      you’ll be shocked to learn that he’s a famous cheater at golf

    • Reximus
    • Shibusa

      So the White House told the press pool: Trump “took meetings & phone calls” at his club. White House wouldn’t say if he played golf.

      Note Trump wearing a (XS) golf glove in that photo!^^^ Crikey.

  • OrG

    Chuck Berry dying makes me feel like listening to The Cramps. Not that I need a reason.

  • Suse
    • Shucky Ducky

      It’s not just political allies. Students, workers, tourists–all avoiding us like the plague. As an NYC resident, this hurts our community.

      • Suse

        Only two months in, too. WTF is next?

        • Résistance Land Shark Ω

          Divorcing Melania and marrying Marine LePen?

          • Suse

            She’s not a 10, sadly.

          • ariel_gee_398

            Or under 40.

      • theCryptofishist

        San Francisco is probably taking the hit, also, too. (Maybe I’d know if I paid attention to the news.)

        • Suse

          Yes, they will be come summer.

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      JUST like Putin wants!

    • Jamoche

      Straight out of the Abusive Relationship Handbook: Isolate the victim from friends, family, and other potential supporters.

  • IOnlyLikeCats

    The “gay” Disney scene is three seconds of a man dancing with a man.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      But, but, but! Wives and daughters!

      WIVES AND DAUGHTERS!

      • IOnlyLikeCats

        So many Regency period pieces are “lesbian” then because women are often shown going onto the dance floor with other women so they can have conversations.

    • Mary Sandoras

      Well tellitubbies were gay too. And I think Sponge Bob Squarepants also, too.

      • snark-lurker

        donut know never cared, Burt & Ernie too

    • Shucky Ducky

      But THE MENZ LIKED IT!!!! That’s just disgusting.

      • snark-lurker

        why?

    • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

      I’m not gay, but I am a man, last time I checked, anyway. And I have been known to dance with another man. A few times, that is. That I can remember. I was numbfaced drunk during the times that I do remember. And I suspect the same for the times I don’t remember, also too.

      • Juan de Fuca

        I can’t recall how many times my friends and I struck out at some night club in Germany and ended up dancing with each other while drunk.

    • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

      How are people supposed to explain that to their chirrens?

      • IOnlyLikeCats

        That people called it gay AND THERE’S NOT SO MUCH AS A PECK ON THE CHEEK OR A ROMANTIC MOONLIGHT STROLL??? I have no idea. The children will be disappointed.

        • RugzYaBurnt

          If these were children raised on Disney movies, they will no doubt remark on the spectacular *lack* of gaiety.

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      I’m so glad everyone got all worked up for/against that!

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      Of course. Everyone is worked up about something completely invented in their own fetid minds, just like always.

    • nightmoth

      Oh, for heaven’s sake. Is that all it is?

    • Alan

      What? Did you watch it you heathen?

      • IOnlyLikeCats

        Not yet.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Is this that long prophesized Day The Music Died?

  • Nick Scroggs

    And Tim Allen saying it’s like “30s Germany” for Hollywood conservatives on some show. Edit, here’s the link: http://www.salon.com/2017/03/17/watch-tim-allen-says-its-like-30s-germany-in-hollywood-right-now-for-conservatives/?source=newsletter

    • Shucky Ducky

      Oh noes–did we throw Steven Segal into an oven?

    • TJ Barke

      In that they’re all super excited that their savior has arrived?

      • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy
        • theCryptofishist

          Those faces in the audience…

          • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

            Like ours now. When do we get to the funny part?

        • Résistance Land Shark Ω

          Always appropriate these days. Brooks is a genius and prognosticator.

    • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

      Yup, it’s just like that all right…what a stupid asshole.

    • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

      I remember, back when he was on TV, thinking that he was visibly twisted with hatred. Didn’t know he was a winger.

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted
      • Suse

        Bwahaha! Good on you!

      • Alan

        Ummm…is that a dead animal on his floor?

        • vivian

          he’s just sleeping…

          • Alan

            Whew.

        • ZangoCrudmonger

          Pining for the fjords.

    • Kiri the Paid Protestor

      Didn’t he used to be funny?

      • Nick Scroggs

        So did Trump’s candidacy.

        • Kiri the Paid Protestor

          That stopped being funny 24 hours after it began.

      • OrG

        I don’t remember that.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Maybe when he was selling dope.

      • Resistance Fighter Astraea

        Not that I recall.

      • Alan

        For a few months, before his first TV show, his standup was humorous.

    • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

      Tim has things a tad backwards there.

      • Lord Jim

        If Timbo REALLY wants that experience, someone should break all the windows out of his house, drag him out and make him wear a garment with a big, pink “C” on the back, so everyone will know he’s a conservatard and can ridicule him in the streets. He really needs to shut the fuck up while his moral credibility lies in only a thousand pieces around him, rather than a million.

  • Ωbjectifier

    Not easy to jam with.
    https://vimeo.com/18623223

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      Keith sounds awesome…. and then Chuck Berry starts playing

      • weejee

        Bending those double stop licks ain’t easy.

        • Ωbjectifier

          Pre-bend, also too.

    • Suse

      This is so great!

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      just fucking awesome. damn,

    • NellCote71

      Keef talks this about this incident in his autobiography. He was stoned and admits he was schooled by Chuck Berry.

  • aktlib101

    Someone should teach Little Shitler how it’s done:
    “MOSCOW (Reuters) – The Russian-backed prime minister of Crimea said on Saturday that Vladimir Putin should be made president of Russia for life and that the Soviet Union would never have collapsed had Putin been in charge.”
    https://www.usnews.com/news/world/articles/2017-03-18/russia-backed-crimea-chief-says-putin-should-be-president-for-life

    • TJ Barke
    • weejee

      However some of the Goobernors may be heading in other directions.

    • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

      I have a bad feeling about this.

    • Nick Scroggs

      Soviet Union might not have collapsed if Trotsky had been in charge, or if Stalin had hit is head in the 20s, or if they hadn’t been such dogmatic smegheads on the level of Breitbart, history is really a very fickle thing.

      • Lambsendbeds

        Upvotes for Red Dwarf reference!

    • Shibusa

      Well if the price of oil hadn’t collapsed in the late 1980s/early 1990s, and German banks had financed Gorby’s perestroika (the way the Japanese bankrolled Saint Reagan’s massive deficits) the Soviet Union likely wouldn’t have collapsed.

  • Juan de Fuca

    According to proposal released by the Department of Homeland Security, the Trump WH is accepting bids from contractors to build a 30 foot concrete wall along the border that:

    […]must also be built in a such a way that it would take at least an hour to cut through it with a “sledgehammer, car jack, pick axe, chisel, battery operated impact tools, battery operated cutting tools, Oxy/acetylene torch or other similar hand-held tools.”

    I don’t know how one uses a car jack to cut through a concrete wall although I have used one to loosen an overtightened bolt on my oil pan, but I like how they went with 30ft, as Home Depot sells a 32ft ladder that even allows for two additional feet of overhang at the top, which is close to OSHA climbing regulations.

    Who says this WH isn’t concerned about safety?

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5d058283a22e09f348a851cf5d390b1fe03ba125b244083db1b25a5eb9f94029.jpg
    https://www.yahoo.com/news/trump-wants-build-30-foot-high-wall-mexican-153214020–finance.html

    • TJ Barke

      Let’s be clear, the only thing the wall will accomplish will be to siphon public funds off into some private coffers.

      • Shoto

        It’s the kleptocrat way. Drumpf is trying to show his mentor Vlad just how much he’s learned.

      • Juan de Fuca

        Agreed. And the specs call for the foundation to be buried 6 ft below ground. The foundation for my block wall in the back yard is only 7ft tall and had to be buried 3ft down, IIRC. Not to mention that many of the tunnels they’ve discovered go down 20 ft or so. This really kinda is like watching a monkee fucking a football. A total waste of our money. We’re fucked.

        • Shibusa

          Be a lot cheaper and more effective to have his minions in the US Congress pen some legislation saying any CEOs who hire illegal immigrants will see the inside of a jail cell and pay a hefty fine. Voila! Problem solved.

        • Alan

          Really? 6 ft? I do not think that will support that wall.

          • Juan de Fuca

            That’s what the AP is reporting:

            One of the CBP contract requests calls for a solid concrete wall, while the other asks for proposals for a see-through structure. Both require the wall to be sunk at least six feet into the ground and include 25- and 50-foot automated gates for pedestrians and vehicles.

            Could be sloppy reporting. Six feet for a 30 ft concrete wall?

          • Alan

            Could be idiots writing specs for something they know nothing about.

        • Courser_Resistance

          Hell, they’ll tunnel from the basement of a house 1/2 mile away, 6 ft ain’t nothin!

      • Nick Scroggs

        Come to think of it, that’s pretty much the Republican way (along with many Democrats over the years) for decades, isn’t it? Bell Gardens, Halliburton, Blackwater, Reagan defense boosts, Enron (pretty sure they were friendly with old W), like big business and organized crime have the same tactics.

        • cmd resistor

          I was even thinking today while listening to stories on radio about the second wall jumper at the White House, if this wasn’t part of a setup so Trump could justify getting us to pay for his private security goons.

      • weejee
      • Alan

        Well yeah.

    • TundraGrifter

      I think the car jack would be used to separate two vertical steel beams.

    • Mary Sandoras
    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Subcontracted by the Knights Who Say Ni.

    • Shibusa

      https://static.vecteezy.com/system/resources/previews/000/135/360/original/rope-ladder-vectors.jpg
      It’s not hard to come up with a $20 workaround for Trump’s great wall of stupid.

      • Juan de Fuca

        I was thinking about using something like that for the back side of the wall. Would be a lot easier than carrying another 32ft ladder up to get down on the other side. That or even a rappeling rope. On, belay!

        • Shibusa

          I could make a fortune selling grappling hooks at the border!

          • Courser_Resistance

            GMTA! With a rope, I’ve got a dandy rope-walking rig, I could scale that thing pretty quick, if I was in shape, you basically run up the rope. Then just reverse the rope and repel down. Use flat-black tactical shit and a ninja suit and you’d be damn near invisible.

            ETA: I’m looking at a length of black 11mm static right across from me in my living room ;-)

        • cmd resistor

          I heard part of this on the radio. Did they really say that the side facing the U.S. is supposed to be more pretty than the Mexican side?

          • Juan de Fuca

            That’s what the proposal says. Well, that’s what the AP article about the proposal says the proposal says. I haven’t read the whole thing and probably won’t. The whole idea is beyond stupid.

          • Biff52

            Moar climber-resistant, too. Wouldn’t want anyone to escape!

      • weejee
    • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

      Okay fine then. A single-barrel AMFO bomb will be able to punch a hole in that proposed wall in about one millisecond.

      Sad. Pathetic.

    • weejee

      Those fiberglass ladders are less shocking but are really heavy

      • Biff52

        I used to have a magnesium/aluminum alloy 40-footer. Sweet jebus, that was heavy! And very flexible–scared the hell out of me.

  • Nick Scroggs

    Something I’ve noticed rewatching old Bugs Bunny cartoons, sandwiches in cartoons seem to usually be drawn as just two slices of bread and lettuce leaf.

    • BoziSpicer
    • Suse

      Bugs Bunny cartoons are the best! He’s such an anarchist.

    • cmd resistor

      I never noticed that. What about the Dagwood sandwiches?

      • Nick Scroggs

        Those were mostly single drawings though, right?

        • cmd resistor

          Yeah, I guess so. Just the sandwich reference. I am going to have to look at the Bugs sandwiches, though.

    • Alan

      You notice odd things.

    • tehbaddr

      Bugs arose during war time. It’s a poke at austerity.

    • Doug Langley

      Ever notice how many fingers cartoon characters have?

      • tehbaddr

        Yeah, and the gloves!

  • Shoto

    Righteous explication of Drumpf’s budget proposal from Charles Pierce

    http://www.esquire.com/news-politics/politics/news/a53897/trump-budget-meals-wheels/

    • weejee

      We need moar Jim Demeter and less Jim Demint.

  • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

    Some bad person is messin’ with Louie’s Wikipedia page, to make him appear even derpier. Trying to make Louie look more stupid is what the Brits refer to as “over egging the pudding.”

    http://crooksandliars.com/2017/03/whos-been-messing-louie-gohmerts-wikipedia

    • RugzYaBurnt

      I am definitely going to be trying too hard to work “over egging the pudding” into conversations from now on.

      • sw19bunnies

        Your ‘trying too hard’ would actually be a classic example of over-egging the pudding.
        HTH,YW :)

    • Kiri the Paid Protestor

      Caribou are pretty sexy, though. Oh sure, they seem diffident, but give ’em a couple of drinks and then watch out.

      • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

        Wouldn’t that be miscegenation? Seeing as how caribou are even-toed ungulates and equines like yourself are odd-toed?

        • Kiri the Paid Protestor

          Unicorns are actually a weird even-toed offshoot from the equine line- not many people know that. That doesn’t make cross-species liaisons any more respectable, but you won’t have much luck explaining that to a drunken caribou.

  • Suse
    • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

      EPIC!

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Take Exit 666, then make a sharp right turn.

      • Scrofula

        Way back I saw a bumper sticker that said “If you want to get to heaven, turn right and go straight.”

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          My favorite new bumper sticker: “One out of three Trump supporters is as stupid as the other two.”

          • Shoto

            Boom! Totally stealing that one.

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            Remember when Rebecca was looking for T-shirt ideas? Oh, I want this one so badly on a T-shirt, except I’d probably get punched in the face since I live in the deep South.

            I went to talk to someone the other day and noticed they had a toilet paper roll with Hillary Clinton’s face on it. This was a BUSINESS, that leases things. You’d think they’d know that some of their customers aren’t rednecks.

        • therblig

          not according to (the underrated imho) OMD

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYvOsnhV6ZY

        • SnarkON

          That’s actually pretty clever for the God Squad.

          • Scrofula

            I’m sure the dude was real proud of it.

      • Suse

        Get your kicks
        On Route 666

        • SnarkON

          Kingman, Barstow, San Bernardino

    • Shibusa

      I read that the artist is getting death threats. (Not surprising.)

      • SeekingResistanceBarbie

        From trumpers? Don’t they know how fascinated trump is with “nuclear”?

      • Shoto

        Particularly in Wingnut, Arizona. Buncha crackpots in that state.

      • Panika MCD

        alt-right and what army? fuck ’em. they will look at the billboard and they will like it.

    • Panika MCD

      now that is how an epic troll is done! poor ex-Sheriff Joe will have to look at that every time he goes to pick up his unemployment check.

    • Penny Dreadful Says Resist

      Succinct.

  • Nick Scroggs

    Another thing the Trump administration reminds me of from The Godfather part II: The whole Cuba sequence, the mob working with Batista, and the book Havana Nights. Edit, I mean Havana Nocturne. And noir stories.

  • mancityRed6
  • Michael R

    Oh , Chuck Berry is gone

    Here’s a cover of Johnny B Good by one of my favorite bands ,
    The Remains , Live in the studio , 1966

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RakVLshGOxA

  • Suse

    Here’s the Tim Allen thing mentioned below. https://twitter.com/historyinflicks/status/843212652025450497

    • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

      Now that supplies some much needed context.

    • Sardonicuss
      • Ωbjectifier

        It really bugs me how that Pink Floyd thing got co-opted by nazis.

        • Sardonicuss

          Well, since they were actually depicting modern Nazis..don’t think it got co-opted too much.
          Of course, when they made The Wall, they didnt think there was an actual chance of it happening again…

          Hah!

    • Alan

      Sorry, anyone who equates being a dimwit in America to being a Jew in WW2 Germany is a complete moron who needs to be ignored forever. When they haul him to the gas house with a tattoo he can get back to me.

    • Ms.MLG on Maui