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Have you seen how all the newspapers in America are coming out with slogans and putting them on t-shirts, and they are all word phrases and sentences that are VERY unkind to Crown Prince Pussgrab of the Mar-a-Lago Pussgrabs? They say things like “Democracy Dies In Darkness” (WaPo) and “Journalism matters” (LA Times) and even “Speaking truth to power since 1847” (Chicago Tribune). How are those things even fair, just because we have a president who has openly declared that a free press is the literal enemy of the American people, a president who makes up facts about things like “wire tapps,” and forces America to waste its damn time investigating such things, just because the idiot squatting in the White House made up his own “alternative facts”?

Here, watch the very short video from “Fox & Friends”:

Media bias on full display! Newspapers now cashing in on t-shirts splashed with anti-President Trump rhetoric! The Washington Post offering this shirt which says, “Democracy dies in darkness.” The LA Times selling shirts that say, “Journalism matters.” And the Chicago Tribune’s feature the line “Speaking truth to power since 1847.” The shirts being sold for about 20 bucks!

Ho-kay. So along those lines, we here at Wonkette were thinking what OTHER kinds of slogans could be construed as “anti-Trump,” and should we also put them on t-shirts and profit financially off them? Well of course we should! How about these?

  • Words definitely mean things. Take THAT, Trump!
  • Facts exist. So do dick jokes. Wonkette!
  • That’s … not how any of this works.
  • Science … it’s not just a river in Egypt anymore!
  • I like my men like I like my grandfather clocks. With normal-sized hands!
  • Barack Obama was born in the United States.
  • Actually, Hillary Clinton won the popular vote.
  • The president of the United States is not a king.
  • Breitbart and Alex Jones lie a lot.
  • Stop trying to make the Bowling Green Massacre a thing, Kellyanne, it will NEVER be a thing.
  • Don’t be mean.
  • You should not kick puppies.
  • Tanning beds are bad for you.
  • Oh, is it cold where you are? Global warming still is real.
  • It is bad form to lust after your own daughter.
  • Literally no one needs that much spray tan.
  • Normal human smiles don’t usually look like buttholes, #ScienceFact
  • If You Have A Signed Contract With Someone And They Fulfill Their Part Of It You Should Pay Them What You Agreed On Instead Of Stiffing Them And Threatening To Sue Them That’s A Dick Move Bro

That last one is very long, and also very anti-Trump, because of how it is true. So how this works is you will decide on your favorite ones in the comments section (and even come up with your own!), and then we will cobble together a few “anti-Trump” t-shirts, with things on them that are just demonstrably true, and you may buy them from us in exchange for money! Ready, set, vote on your favorites in the comments, what are not allowed!

Wonkette is fully reader-funded, so even if you are going to buy a t-shirt, give us money anyway, because #reasons is why.

$
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  • TJ Barke

    Criticism of Herr Trumpenfuhrer est verboten.

  • AnnieGetYerFun

    It’s almost as if the President of the United States making constant references to the mainstream media as “the enemy” is considered a problem by regular people as well as the MSM.

  • Indivisible Snark Tank

    Journamalism Rocks!

    • AustenFuego

      How dare you be so anti-Trump!! :S

  • Oblios_Cap

    How strange. I didn’t see Trump’s name appear on any of those shirts. What in world are they talking about?

    • MeerkatsRMammals

      Well, it’s all the “FAKE NEWS” outlets…I guess that’s where they got that idea.

  • Indivisible Snark Tank

    Babby Needs a New Pair of Shoes: Give to Wonkette!

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    Newspapers now cashing in on t-shirts splashed with anti-President Trump rhetoric!

    Methinks thou doth protest too much. Only those with a guilty conscience would make such claims.

  • The Wanderer

    Guilt much, Fox?

  • jesuswasablack
  • Martini Ambassador

    If you believe messaging like “Truth and Democracy Matter” is against your brand, than maybe your brand is what’s at fault. Just sayin’.

  • msanthropesmr

    “fuck you you fucking fuck”

    • Indivisible Snark Tank

      I believe we have our first finalist!

    • Ωbjectifier

      “My hands are bigger than Donny’s”

      • Resistance Fighter Callyson

        Make that in baby clothes sizes!

      • Lascauxcaveman

        (*Only available in baby onesies and toddler size T-shirt)

        Edit: Dammit Again, Callie!

    • vh

      c’mon don’t be shy. tell us what you really think. we are all friends here.

    • MizzMazz

      LOL, those shirts were for sale at Ozzfest one year :D

      • Celtic_Gnome

        Stiff Records had t-shirts with their logo on it: “If it ain’t Stiff, it ain’t worth a fuck.”

        • MizzMazz

          I had the button! Someone put Stiffs Live on you tube – great blast from the past.

    • aureolaborealis

      “It’s Daddy, you shit-head! Where’s my bourbon?”

  • OrG

    So, now fux not only hates the Constitution but free enterprise also too?

    • msanthropesmr

      Yes.

  • Indivisible Snark Tank

    TrumpCare: Healthcare for Morans

  • msanthropesmr

    Fix news t-shirt reads
    “Ignorant and proud”

    • writersbloc

      need to get “freedom” in there as well.

      • OrG

        Freedumb?

      • PubOption

        “Freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose.” – K. Kristofferson

    • Lascauxcaveman

      “Ignorant and Proud” “Ignorent and Proud.”

      /fixed

      • timpundit

        Incoherent many times, also too.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    FOX News is critical of other news outlets “cashing in on rhetoric” now?

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/11ed3211fda097761f1cf4fc1e2a0d21bbed547ccdb852f675c506efc8525dc2.jpg

  • Inner Venom

    Right winger: Man, these SJW college kids and gays and ethnic minorities are so easily offended and special snowflakes! Get over it, crybabies! It’s called free speech! You can’t censor what others say. LOL go crawl to your safe space!

    *Colin Kaepernick doesn’t stand for national anthem, Meryl Streep criticizes Trump, someone makes a shirt criticizing Trump etc.*

    Right winger: Whaaat!? This is so anti-American and racist! If you don’t like America then leave! The liberal media has an agenda against Trump! So much for the tolerant left! This is why Trump won! I thought you lefties were supposed to be tolerant? WAAAAAH!!!

  • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

    When anyone yells “ASSHOLE,” at any time, for any reason, FOX News knows it’s anti-Trump rhetoric.

  • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

    Media bias on full display! Newspapers now cashing in on t-shirts splashed with anti-President Trump rhetoric!

    Translation: How dare people criticize Der Gropenführer!!1 Waaaahhh!!

    What a bunch of WATBs. 😒

  • Roni Resistance Raven

    “Now we know why Trump loves the poorly educated.”

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • MissNomer

      Credit George Takei for that one.

  • memzilla Ω

    I vote for the 97 year-old Mencken quote:

    “As democracy is perfected, the office represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. We move toward a lofty ideal. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart’s desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.”

  • MynameisBlarney

    What a bunch of butthurt WATB’s…

  • gamera23

    While the rest of us are playing digital streams
    you’re still playing with an old 45

    • Sister the Resister

      ISWYDT!

  • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

    “Have a nice day”

    ANTI-TRUMPER!!! EEEEEEEEEEEE

    http://cdn-static.denofgeek.com/sites/denofgeek/files/images/16539.jpg

  • elviouslyqueer

    “Fox News: Putting the Stupid in Stupid Motherfuckers Since 1996.”

    That better, you smarmy assholes?

  • “Democracy Dies In Darkness”
    “Journalism matters”
    “Speaking truth to power since 1847”

    So, Fox is saying that they think Democracy, Journalism, and Truth are anti-Trump?

    Huh. Stopped clock and all, I guess.

    • GoutMachine

      “Democracy Dies In Darkness” – all they have to do is take the Post’s slogan as a how-to, not a warning. There! All fixed!

    • CeeQ

      Omg stop saying these mean things about Trump that are mean and are also true! That’s so mean!

  • GoutMachine
  • TheGrandWazoo2
  • Zonath

    So Fox “News” has finally come out officially against anti-Trump things like democracy, truth, and journalism. Sure, it’s always been obvious that they were against these things, but for them to just come out and /say/ as much is a refreshing change.

    • Liberoid Ron

      Full marks for honesty, I guess.

      • OrG

        If you tell the truth by accident,is that honesty?

        • Liberoid Ron

          Just trying to be fair and balanced.

    • boyblue122

      Some of the people on the network are even regurgitating Kremlin lines like they are being paid off by Russia Today

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      “Your candor is refreshing. Your actual words, less so.”

  • h4rr4r

    I wonder if they care to explain how any of those are anti-Trump.

    Do they mean the president is opposed to these american principles?

  • Villago Delenda Est

    “Jail the Bitch” on a tshirt is of course perfectly OK.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Bonus points if you wear it while saying Muslims have no respect for women

    • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

      “Hillary for Prison” even though Hillz never colluded with the Rooskies and Vlady to win, unlike the Groper in Chief (most likely) did.

    • cmd resistor

      As well as “Trump That Bitch.”

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Well of course, because SHUT UP YOU LIBTARD!

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      Maybe we should have “Jail the Bitch” T-shirts with Trump’s picture on it?

      • Anna Elizabeth

        “Impeach the Dog”.

  • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

    “Shit Sandwiches Are Delicious”

    (Can we REALLY be sure this isn’t pro-Trump?)

    • Crank Tango

      The more bread you got, the less shit you gotta eat.

      • MissNomer

        ^^^This is actually quite profound.^^^

  • The Witch of Endor

    I’m for “Actually, Hillary Won The Popular Vote”, but I suggest dropping “Actually,”.

  • MynameisBlarney
    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      Like a Republican is annoyed by facts and logic. They just don’t listen.

    • TJ Barke

      Annoy a republican, treat others the way you want to be treated.

  • Sardonicuss

    Idiocracy: Not an instruction manual!

  • amindofitsown

    I didn’t realize that “Journalism matters” had such an anti-Trump bias…huh, the more you know

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Really any support for decency or democracy is an insult to Republicans.

      • tehbaddr

        I’ll have another thanx!

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg

    So OT but how is the snow going?

    • MeerkatsRMammals

      Once again, the Snowpocalypse was a lie. I just got done shoveling 2 inches of icy slush. Hubby’s down with a bad back, so it’s all up to me. 6 yr old is pissed that he got a snow day & can’t play in it :( I’m currently hiding here at the Wonkette.

      • The Witch of Endor

        In the words of Alec Hardison:

        Break out the wine and the xanax, people, we’ve got a snow day.

        • MeerkatsRMammals

          Wine? Check. Xanax? Sad face. That would make this day more bearable…thanks for the tip!

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        I had a hard time believing half a meter snow in NYC in March.

  • WotsAllThisThen

    “Sexual assault is wrong” is so blatantly anti-Trump, it drives the fox news blondes crazy.

  • tehbaddr

    “Haven’t we met before? Was it at the Two Minute Hate or the Golden Corral?”

    • elviouslyqueer

      Why can’t it be both?

      • GoutMachine

        Make it Cracker Barrel and you HAVE both!

    • boyblue122

      specifically it was at the chocolate wonderfall

      • tehbaddr

        Eeeeewwww! I saw one of those in action one time, kids sticking their fingers in the flow then licking them and all repeatedly, disgusting!

  • I would absolutely wear the “Science” shirt.

  • Debra Dassow

    “The lie ain’t the other side of the story, it’s just a lie”. The Wire.

  • Jenny

    No, you’re the puppet.

    • Rick Hill

      Applies to fox, too

  • Lefty Wright

    How about “Ethics. It’s not just a continuing education seminar”.

  • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

    “Micropeens Are Tiny”

    ANTI-TRUMP MESSAGES!!11

  • Raan

    I vote for numbers 2, 8, and 16.

  • MynameisBlarney
    • tehbaddr

      Yet farmers and slave owners, many of them anyway.

  • Sardonicuss

    Fair and Balanced: Doesn’t mean what you think it means.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “Fair of face and balanced of boobs?”
      — Roger Ailes

      • Crank Tango

        #alltittiesmatter

      • Sardonicuss

        Blond and Symmetrical – Fox News

  • azeyote

    Trump – golden toilets – golden showers

  • Rick Hill

    “Truck fump”?

  • Rachel Book Harlot
  • Jenny

    Or let’s see, ” From Russia with love.” and then Trumps stupid fucking face

  • So… journalism does not matter? I’m confused.

    Somebody should these guys that both “Black Lives Matter” and “Journalism Matters” can be true.

    • Rick Hill

      “All lives matter!”*

      *excludes the following(Unless they also make over $1 mill and donate to republican causes):
      -poor lives
      -minority lives
      -freethinkers lives
      -post born lives
      …..etc

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Rejected newspaper T-Shirt slogans:

    “Try putting that web page in the bottom of a bird cage”

    “Our ombudsman thinks we do a good job”

    “Emails!”

    OK, maybe I’m still too bitter about the press coverage of the the 2016 to get too excited about this one?

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

    OT: had job interview today. I think it went well. Not sure.

    Wish me luck. Prayers are OK if you do that sort of thing :)

    • Pilotshark

      positive thoughts and taste waves to you :-)

    • BosGrl

      Good luck! What kind of job is it?

      • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

        tech.

        • BosGrl

          Great – sending you positive energy :)

    • MeerkatsRMammals

      May the force be with you :)

    • Teecha

      Fingers are crossed for you here!

    • DahBoner

      Always assume you didn’t. Keep looking. Forget about it.

      That way if they call you back with an offer, it’s a pleasant surprise (and you might already have another offer from someone QUICKER TO RECOGNIZE YOUR GENIUS which would allow you to say NO THANKS I ALREADY GOT A JOB, BITCHES) 😁

  • Crank Tango

    Sheesh, they’re even getting bad at playing the victim these days.

  • alpacapunchbowl

    Nothing at all suspect that they should just jump right to the conclusion that the shirts are anti-Trump. Within context, sure they *sort of* are. But in my experience, when someone is that touchy it’s because they know they’re complicit in something bad.

    Anyway, I’m buying the WaPo and am really looking forward to what the Wonks come up with. I need some new summer clothes! Hoping there’s a laydeez tank top option.

  • elviouslyqueer

    “Brian Kilmeade’s Face is a Puckered Anus: We Report, You Decide.”

    • GoutMachine

      That’s a TRUE SCIENCE FACT!

  • Jenny

    Or a shirt that just says DEATH PANEL with the gop elephant

  • MeerkatsRMammals

    So many punchable faces…so little time!

  • MynameisBlarney
    • tehbaddr

      Aaawww!

    • NastyBossetti

      Aw! I have a murder dog!

      • MynameisBlarney

        My puppeh is part moidah doawg.

  • Carpe Vagenda
    • The Witch of Endor

      Christ on a pony!

    • Jenny

      So always a terrible person? What a catch!

    • mancityRed6

      “made” him try one on
      uh-huh.
      sure.
      as they say, I believe you, thousands wouldn’t

      • Teecha

        All men secretly fancy the idea of themselves in budgie smugglers.

        • mancityRed6

          #notallmen
          I haven’t even worn any tightie whities in at least 25 years.

          • Teecha

            You say that…

        • magyar of infinite power

          If we do (and I do), we don’t try them on for the first time in front of anyone

        • mancityRed6

          “budgie”
          I’ll take that as a compliment.

        • Celtic_Gnome

          Going home on the bus one day, we passed a guy mowing his lawn in nothing but a speedo. The entire bus erupted in laughter. A woman near me said, “I bet he thinks he looks good.”

    • Latverian Diplomat

      His first experience with focus group evaluations of a bad idea?

    • Teecha

      He’d have been better off with the stuffy Brits. Our mocking is much kinder.

    • BosGrl

      Smart enough for a year at Oxford but apparently always an asshole.

    • DahBoner

      Luntz was in grad school, so age 21-23. And he’d only been fat for “15 years”, so 15/23 or 65% of his whole life.

      Another dumbass who can’t do simple arithmetic 😁

      • Teecha

        I think he means he’s been fat for the last 15, but wasn’t then.

        • DahBoner

          If he wasn’t fat, then why was he afraid of wearing a Speedo. Logic.

          • Teecha

            Tiny cock?

    • No. Just no. I refuse to have that image even appear on my mind.

      Screw you @jmhm:disqus!

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I just thought it was interesting in light of the article I read about Kellyanne in Buzzfeed today.

        Conway recently turned 50; but unlike other women of her age, she has
        insisted on keeping her hair long, like the conservative women 20 years her junior, and embraces a sort of coy girlishness in her manner. She doesn’t cover her arms or her neck, as older women are taught to do in order to hide “unseemly” wrinkles.

        Let’s be clear: This shouldn’t be a sin. There are reasons to criticize Kellyanne Conway, but her appearance is absolutely not one of them. Yet in today’s media climate, Conway’s appearance, combined with her visibility, has rendered her not just unruly, but bordering on abject. Memes most often compare her to Cruella de Vil, Skeletor, and Golem; one calls her a “Sewer Rat Barbie” while another viral Instagram image compares her complexion to a withered banana. The only woman her age who’s received similarly vicious treatment is, ironically, Madonna. Both Conway and Madonna have become some version of what theorists call “the monstrous feminine”
        — the woman who chooses not to “act her age,” fails to discipline her body to look younger than that age, or refuses to disappear entirely.

        Which, OK? Except for “stretch pants women” and the above, which suggest to me that Kellyanne’s problem is not that she’s challenging society’s norms of attractiveness, it’s that she thinks she’s the rare woman who meets them.

        • Teecha

          Yeh, I read that article too. I don’t think the emphasis should be on her looks, because it avoids the real issue, which is the emptiness of her heart and soul, her lack of humanity and her grasping, power hungry actions. But we should reserve the right to point out that Roald Dahl spoke the truth when he said our appearances resemble our character as we age.

          Also, I don’t think that she and Madonna are criticised for the same reasons.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            Well, that and she’s a social x-ray. At a certain age, if you have flesh, it droops. There have always been a class of women who do the never too rich or too thin thing. She’s not rejecting body image issues, she’s letting them eat her alive.

        • magyar of infinite power

          Long hair is fine, ratty assed extensions are not.

        • But it’s what’s on the inside that counts, right? If so, she’s in even more trouble.

        • Mildred Broxon

          “Coy girlishness?” Is that what we’re calling it? I would have said deranged viciousness.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            Have you ever noticed that when men who don’t like women very much like a woman, she’s generally not very nice?

  • Isaac Heston

    In Russia, dipshit elects you!

  • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

    “Do Farts Have Lumps”

    THE ANTI-TRUMP RHETORIC IS OUT OF HAND!!11

    • alpacapunchbowl

      I don’t know what that means, but it’s cracking me up!

  • Jamoche

    “First Amendment. There’s a reason it’s ahead of the Second.”

    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      You can’t change the second amendment man. Yes you can. That’s why it’s called an amendment. You don’t need a gun as much as a thesaurus.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      “We’re ignoring the first 13 words of the Second Amendment and jumping straight to the ones we like.”

  • SterWonk

    Stop trying to make the Bowling Green Massacre a thing, Kellyanne, it will NEVER be a thing.

    Until she snaps snapps

  • Jenny

    Uterus inspector!

  • msanthropesmr

    The penis mightier than the sword.

    • Rick Hill

      “Pen is broken, use finger”

  • OrG

    Guess they prolly wouldn’t like my dump trump t-shirt,huh?

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    I would like two T-shirts:
    1) I would NOT tapp that (Trump’s picture)
    2) No Mandate

  • DahBoner
    • Raan

      I hope beyond hope that these are making fun of the Teabaggers, but I can’t be sure because 2016 murdered Poe’s Law.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Yup, like Winter Soldier with a Solothurm 20mm rifle.

        • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

          That’s “Solothurn” Anna…

          Bub the Pedantic zombie

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Thank you! I prefer to be corrected on historic facts. :)

      • OrG

        We know it.They don’t.

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Hey there Fox & Friends? Bloviate me, Beeyotch, with votes and my utter contempt for you people that dare to call yourselves “Journalists”.

  • Ricky Gay
  • Pisto75666

    If You Have A Signed Contract With Someone And They Fulfill Their Part Of It You Should Pay Them What You Agreed On Instead Of Stiffing Them And Threatening To Sue Them That’s A Dick Move Bro

    Hopefully the t-shirt company doesn’t charge by the letter. EDIT: By the word, even…..sheesh that’s a lot of words!

    • MeerkatsRMammals

      Or, could just shorten to “That’s a dick move, Bro” or even simpler for the RWNJ’s who don’t read good “Don’t be a dick” ;)

      • Pisto75666

        Even better! It’s so handy, too! Works in any situation!

    • Only by syllables Douchey can nail in three tries or more

  • Ricky Gay
    • OneYieldRegular

      LoofahOL.

  • SweetDeeKat

    I just got my Liz Warren “Nevertheless She Persisted” shirt and now I need all of these. Thanks for the new wardrobe, everybody!

  • tapp_my_wire,please

    Trump: When Millard Fillmore Just Won’t Do.

  • Hairstrike Alpha

    Mango Jesus is a twisted toddler’s todger

  • Teecha

    ‘Trump- may his carpet be forever full of lego’

    • Sister the Resister

      Ooooo! that’s a curse worth keeping handy!

    • ~ ☆ míkhαílα ☆ ~ 【忠実反抗】

      Trump: may he never be able to find the TV remote.

      • BosGrl

        He’s got Spicer for that.

  • Hairstrike Alpha

    There are other Amendments besides the second…

    • amindofitsown

      The hell you say!

    • tehbaddr

      “They put the 2nd there to protect the 1st, so you better shut up before I shoot you!”

  • Daru Titor

    I’d wear 3, 11 and 16.

  • janecita

    We are living in strange times! Since when, supporting free speech, and democracy slogans are a bad thing?

  • Vincent Ricola

    I want a t-shirt that says “Fox & Friends can eat my entire ass.”

    • Teecha

      It’s the ‘entire’ which really makes that suggestion sparkle. Thanks!

      • Ricky Gay

        indeed yes!

  • Red Bird Ω

    OT/ is there a place where I can find pictures of animals with coffee mugs?

  • The Witch of Endor
    • BosGrl

      OMG!

    • Rick Hill

      Yer sex toys are making reports to your microwave!!

      • Anna Elizabeth

        I bet my Microwave is impressed at how many batteries I use in a month.

        • magyar of infinite power

          Rechargeables are better for the environment, just sayin’

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Saving up for a plug in. I burned out my fave toy 2 weeks ago.

            Too bad this guy next door was “hit it and quit it”. XD

  • Mr. Blobfish

    “Fuck That Guy” with a picture of Smellyanne, which is now in my suggested words.

  • Rick Hill

    “Save taxpayers money, lock them up, NOW”

  • Jenny

    A pink shirt that says “bleeding from my wherever.”

    • janecita

      Change pink to red, and I’m buying it!

    • NastyBossetti

      Or underwear!

  • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie
    • Anna Rompage

      I bet you the girlfriend is a victim of domestic abuse, and instead of leaving that sad sack of shit, she takes her frustrations out on the family pet, and children…

    • JohnBull

      A thousand bucks says his wife has heard this word more than once.

      • magyar of infinite power

        If that’s her standing next to him, they are also brother and sister

    • Villago Delenda Est

      No problem.

    • Truly Madly Derply
      • Truly Madly Derply

        I guess they don’t mind it since it’s not directed at them. No journalists at Fox.

    • MissNomer

      OMG, those faces.

  • therblig

    no step on snek!

  • i’mjustaskingthequestion

    trump…there are more important things to waste a capital “t” on…

  • Reality Kills

    Media is a liberal construct, someone said on CNN once.

    • OrG

      It IS, see putin’s russia.

  • anwisok

    I vote for “The Precedent of the United States is not a king.”

    • Bebecca

      I love it but would anyone but us liberal news junkies get it?

      • anwisok

        Probably not. :(

  • Moebym the Persistent Returner

    “She was warned. Nevertheless, she resisted.”

    or

    “My cat is more qualified to be President.”

    I know. Lame.

    • Pisto75666

      I disagree. I would DEFINITELY buy the cat one.

    • Teecha

      Maybe change cat to pussy?

      • Moebym the Persistent Returner

        Good call.

  • Anna Rompage

    I wonder how many of these shits sold during the 2012 presidential election, and to whom (Faux viewers, I’m looking at you!)

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/3295547039cbf0ba5d308f960b63dc894fdcfeb12e2d4171d55d09647c2ea4cb.jpg

    • Teecha

      On the one hand- eew! And on the other, at least it makes the racist easy to spot and avoid/lambast/annoy/argue with

    • BosGrl

      That shirt makes me nauseous. And anxious.

      • Anna Rompage

        I apologize, it is pretty fucking horrific, as is the double standard on Faux Noose…

    • JohnBull

      Imagine all the relatives who have banned him from Thanksgiving dinner.

      • Anna Rompage

        I’m more disturb by the thought of the relatives that haven’t…

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Master Race, on display. *spits*

    • Roni Resistance Raven

      Hahaha nice Freudian slip there.

    • Bebecca

      I had a shirt I loved during that election-Dogs for Obama
      My note: (remember the story about Romney taking the dog on vacation in a kennel strapped to the top of the family station wagon?)

  • Jonny On Maui

    I’m sure this has been posted…

    “Don’t blame me. I voted for Hillary.”

  • Reality Kills

    Conservative media is an alternative wording for propaganda.

  • Brad H

    One of my favorites was: “I get my news from a failing pile of garbage” – Buzzfeed.

    • NastyBossetti

      That is pretty great.

  • mancityRed6

    Fox News:
    you don’t have to be a RWNJ to watch it, but it helps.

  • scorpy_1

    Shorter Trump: Barely Noticable

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    “The press gave Trump free pass to the presidency, and all I got was this lousy t-shirt”.

  • Kiri the Paid Protestor

    “Women Don’t Actually Enjoy Being Grabbed Like That”

  • Rick Hill

    “Remember when we had preznits and not dictators in America?
    Pepperidge farm remembers.”

  • janecita
  • Nockular cavity

    Jesu, Vishnu, and Mohammed what a bunch of snowflakes. None of those slogans even mentioned Trump, the Republicans, or whatever. ‘Smatter, nazis, got a guilty conscience?

    OTOH, I would buy the shit out of a “Facts exist. So do dick jokes. Wonkette!” t-shirt.

    • BosGrl

      Now I’m going to say “Jesu, Vishnu and Mohammed” instead of my usual J/M/J. I think I’ll probably walk around all day saying it.

    • magyar of infinite power

      Me three!

  • OrG

    “Pee-hookers Lives Matter”

  • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

    Pro-Trump Shirt (because he loves the uneducated)

    Fuckin’ A Dude
    Trump’s Huge Mandate

    • Ricky Gay

      fuckin a dude? me not so sure?

      • Rick Hill

        You’re not in favor of a huge man date?

        • Ricky Gay

          ha!

  • MeerkatsRMammals

    Fox News is Anti-Democracy

  • Mr. Blobfish

    OT, have you heard about the Hearing Protection Act? Silencers will now be legal. Fuck it. I want a sawed off shotgun.

    • Notreelyhelping

      Now we can have mass shootings that don’t wake the neighbors! Winning!

      I meant to ask if you caught the blobfish mermaid on SNL?

      • Mr. Blobfish

        I did. Quite clever. I usually don’t have a thing for Scarlet, but she was pretty good.

        • Notreelyhelping

          I like that she was willing to play against type, although–unsurprisingly–Kate stole half of the scene. Kate definitely gets the MVP this season.

  • Teecha

    Well done steak is not steak done well.

  • Mary Sandoras

    OT: Gallup has Trump losing 6% points in 2 days.
    39 approve
    55 disapprove

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      Reuters is showing Trump at 48.3% disapproval, and 46.9% approval, which is better than yesterday when he was at 49% approval. I want his approval ratings at 15% (Dick Cheney’s when he left office).

      • BosGrl

        I know I’ve said this over and over but WHO are these 39-48% that think he’s doing a great job?

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          Ninety percent of Republicans think he’s doing a good job. Yeah, let that sink in for a minute or two. Most of the GOP is batshit crazy, which I kind of knew, but this has totally reaffirmed it.

          • Shibusa

            You have to be so aggressively, willfully ignorant to think he’s doing a good job at this point. Truly, the news filtering these people do is a marvel. (And I do know some of these morons.)

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            When you watch Fox News, you have NO idea that the 235,000 jobs that Trump “created” last month, was the same number that Obama had created for the past 6 years. Also, the numbers are real now, even though the methodology for counting has not changed. How dumb do you have to be to believe that?

          • Mike Steele

            You also don’t know much about conflicts of interest, business failures, Russian oligarchs, TRyancare, deletion of facts/science on websites, paying for Uday/Qusay security while they do Daddy’s bidness or anything else of value.

        • Tiny kaiju

          Statistical margins of error and the pollsters’ moms (they’ll say anything to make their babies happy).

    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      What do you mean OT? That’s a brilliant text for a shirt, sure to piss off fox and friends.

    • (Major_Major_Major)ly_Pissed

      That is a shirt I would gladly buy. A shame they don’t make interactive t-shirts that would update the ratings as they continue to sink.

  • The Witch of Endor

    Maybe:

    “Nasty Vile Little Snark Mob”
    wonkette.com

    If someone has already suggested this, I’m on board.

  • (Major_Major_Major)ly_Pissed
  • Roni Resistance Raven

    “My microwave reported me to ICE.”

  • OrG

    Fascism-Not just for breakfast anymore.

  • Me not sure

    “We now officially make more money off of t-shirt sales than newspapers.”

  • MeerkatsRMammals

    “Kick Trump right in the balls!” – Meerkid

  • Jgb979
    • Anna Elizabeth

      Let’s be fair. Maybe he’s aiming that sign at Erin Moran, “Happy Days”s; “Joanie”.

      • Jgb979

        I’ve heard reasonable sounding explanations that he was actually making a pun about the Moran Family Foundation for mental health.

        But no someone found him: he is who you thought he was
        http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=439×1758384

        • Anna Elizabeth

          The mustache and haircut were clue enough, honestly.

          • Hairstrike Alpha

            The doo rag just screams meth lab class

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Indeed. XD

          • alpacapunchbowl

            I never even notice before that he’s wearing a Cardinals shirt. Too distracted by the sign and the mulletude. Anyway, fuck the Cardinals.

        • anwisok

          I wonder how the lawsuits went. LOLOLOL

      • BosGrl

        Well she did love Chachi.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          XD LOL Good point!

        • Anna Rompage

          Chachi, that’s what a call it when I have a bout of gastrointestinal distress and things come out too soft and not well formed….

          “I’m not feeling so hot, and had the chachis this morning”

          • Mike Steele

            In our home, that’s the Flying Wallendas

    • Mr. Blobfish

      To his credit, he did an interview years later and said, yeah, I’m pretty much a dope.

  • Martini Ambassador

    It’s tough to keep brats in line, eh?
    https://media.giphy.com/media/xUPGcLKuGsvaK43kSQ/source.gif

    • OrG

      Now THAT’S funny.

    • Roni Resistance Raven

      Crying. Lol

    • Moebym the Persistent Returner

      Can’t stop watching.

      • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

        When the wife slides in Risky Business style.. classic.

        • Tiny kaiju

          Also Speed Baby in her souped-up walker

          • Celtic_Gnome

            I understand you can’t get those walkers in the US anymore. A couple of stupid kids roll down the basement steps and ruin it for everyone. Fuckin’ snowflakes.

          • Tiny kaiju

            Baby bumper walkers were great fun.

    • Notreelyhelping

      Genius.

    • Choosymom

      That is just the best!

  • Jenny

    A picture of a ballot for TRUMP with words…”Here, hold my beer.” – Murica.

  • Zonath

    I’m betting that if someone made a shirt just saying, “Nazis are Bad”, Fox News would get someone on the air to lose their shit over it. Either that or, “Putin is a Bad Hombre”.

    • Yellow_Dog_Dem

      For people who call other people snowflakes, these people sure get upset about the dumbest things.

  • Sardonicuss

    “Can’t think..’bait-in!” – Fox News

  • AJ Milne

    Awwwwwww! Poor widdle enablers of autocracy…

    Call me when they start doing the ‘Die in prison’ tees.

  • MeerkatsRMammals

    UN-Presidented?

  • JohnBull

    Fox News is right–free speech and capitalism suck.

  • The Flaming Carrot

    You spelled “moranz” wrong.

  • Kiri the Paid Protestor

    Let’s pick on the evil spawn, too:

    “Shooting Something You’re Not Gonna Eat Is A Dick Move, Bro”

  • OneYieldRegular

    It’s simultaneously hysterical and revealing that FOX News thinks that “Democracy dies in darkness” is “anti-Trump.”

  • Paperless Tiger

    Well, those t-shirts are really just generally anti-corruption. If the shoe fits, maybe you shouldn’t call attention to it.

    • JohnBull

      If the shoe doesn’t fit, wear bread bags instead. It starts a career in the Senate.

  • Mehmeisterjr

    Oh noes! First the microwaves have turned against him, now the t-shirts. Next thing you know, the Shamwows will drain his precious bodily fluids. Quick, somebody warn him in the middle of the night.

  • The Molten Soul

    45: The philosophical bastard-child of Warren Harding and Andrew Jackson.

  • Hairstrike Alpha

    Hillary’s (vote size) was bigger than Trumps. Donnie has a smaller (vote count) than a girl

  • Bitter Scribe

    Reality and Reality TV Are Not the Same Thing

  • Carpe Vagenda
    • Pisto75666

      Oh no….No way. These idiots are NOT gonna ruin waffles for me!

      • Sophia

        Then you don’t want to hear what they did with the syrup.

        • magyar of infinite power

          It can’t possibly be any worse than what I do with it.

        • Pisto75666

          *snort*

          No, I do not.

  • Persistent Demme

    How about a shirt from the MSM that says:
    ” Billion$ in Free Publicity!”
    Would they like that?

  • Hairstrike Alpha

    The presidency is not a reality tv game show

    • Anna Rompage

      Says who?

    • Pisto75666

      OBJECTION! Assumes facts not in evidence!

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    Trump’s picture followed by:
    Not A Ten
    Wouldn’t Tapp That with YOUR Russian Dick

    • leemoder

      Wouldn’t tap that with KellyAnne’s dick.

  • (Major_Major_Major)ly_Pissed

    Don’t Blame Me, They Were Both the Same

  • MynameisBlarney
  • Mr. Blobfish

    No puppet. No puppet. You’re the puppet

  • Hairstrike Alpha

    This fist is for punching Nazi’s.

    – Oregon

  • Jamoche

    http://www.newyorker.com/news/daily-comment/trump-cant-stop-himself

    Another article on how Trump disrespects the presidency, focusing on the history of Camp David, with a nice description of his former career: “real-estate brander”.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Trump cannot abide being anywhere where a) he is not the center of attention and b) there are numerous amounts of people who know he is the center of attention.
      Notice how they’re talking about how his “foreign trips” will be short affairs, because Trump cannot stand to do anything outside of his comfort zone unless absolutely necessary. If teleporters existed, he’d be an early adopter because it would allow him to sleep where he wants to sleep every night rather than in some foreign place.

      • Sophia

        He had a bad experience in Moscow so he likes to stay at home or in his own hotels now.

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        Too bad teleporters don’t exist…imagine the accident, with votes

      • Celtic_Gnome

        Explains why Pence gets all the foreign trips.

  • The Flaming Carrot

    “Speaking truth to power since 1847” – unless that power happens to be named Daley.

  • jesuswasablack

    This has always been my favorite shirt, I wear it quite often!
    https://www.godammit.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/cunt-guy-and-me.jpg

    • Truly Madly Derply

      Mine was a cute spaghetti strap tee (I’m a fembot, so spaghetti straps=totes okay) that read “My friend, I’m voting for that one.” But I like yours, too.

  • TheGrandWazoo2

    #SomeHowIt’sTrump

  • Hairstrike Alpha

    Kellyannes blow dryer called her a dumb, lying cunt. You don’t want to know what her vibrator says to her…

  • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

    God is a Republican.
    Jesus is a Democrat.
    Whose side are YOU on?

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Cthulhu’s.

    • Mr. Blobfish

      The Holy Ghost is a Libertarian

      • snark-lurker

        i thought the holy ghost was a trivestite

        • Querolous

          A Transubstantiationite.

    • Pisto75666

      Scooby Doo’s

  • Tallmutha

    Don’t just sit back and take it, Fox, fight back with versions of your own. “Democracy thrives when nobody knows shit.” “Journalism? Ahahaha.” “Buttfrenching the comfy since 1996.”

    • NastyBossetti

      That last one is really beautiful.

  • Roni Resistance Raven

    Three million more voters can’t be wrong.

    • Regret

      I object to that one, it is not a fact and it is just as easily used against you.

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Opioids are the opiates of the masses

    • magyar of infinite power

      mmmmm, Percocet

  • leemoder

    Just admit it…You’re fucking bald!

  • BosGrl

    Asshole (TX Rep Joe Barton) on MSNBC: “CBO is not Nostradamus” and when Katy T asks about the 64 y/o needing to spend more than half their income on premiums: “They can get Medicare at 65”. Katy: “What if they get sick when they are 64?”. : “CHOICES!”

    • Anna Rompage

      There’s not enough rusty chainsaws in this country to be able to curtail the amount of mean spirited stupid going around

    • (Major_Major_Major)ly_Pissed

      They just have to choose not to get sick, and if they start feeling a bit under the weather, just pull themselves healthy by their bootstraps.

      • BosGrl

        Maybe they can just go spend the day outdoors in the fresh air. That cures illnesses – Melania says so!

        • (Major_Major_Major)ly_Pissed

          Give’em a 15 minute outside break everyday as a concession to the working stiffs when that National Right to Work gets passed.

          • Celtic_Gnome

            Cogs in the machine don’t get concessions.

    • alpacapunchbowl

      Oh, so NOW these assholes are pro-choice.

    • Longstreet63

      Of course, they’re also cutting medicare, so they’d best die at 64.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Easy- it’s a choice between healthcare, food, and a roof over your head. How tough is that?

    • AncienReggie

      This is not a hard choice. Just quit spending so much on cat food. Buy dog for in bulk and eat that. Ol’ Roy is a lot cheaper than Mr. Frisky.

  • Mildred Broxon

    “The president of the United States is not a king.” gets my vote, and I would buy one. A shirt, not a king, I mean. We already have a king and we didn’t need any!

  • Mr. Blobfish

    EMAILS!!!!!!

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      “But her emails!”
      “Lucky we don’t have a President who’s shrill!”

  • Reality Kills

    I wish Boris Yeltsin would be around.

    • alpacapunchbowl

      So you’re the one who inspired the band name “Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin”!

  • bookish

    Quoted in full. IntelBrief. The Soufan Group.

    THE GREATEST THREAT TO WESTERN STABILITY

    Bottom Line Up Front:

    • Amid fears of Russian interference and right-wing exploitation, the Netherlands will hold a general election on March 15, with other European elections to follow in 2017.

    • Numerous intelligence agencies continue to warn that Russia and its proxies are determined to undermine confidence in the EU as a social and political construct in hopes of peeling off member states.

    • Both within Europe and in the U.S., right-wing anti-globalist groups are also seeking to dismantle the EU, encouraging distrust of government and social policies.

    • The centrifugal pressures—ranging from real demographic concerns to fake news and cyber network hacking—threatening to pull apart the EU are significant and difficult to counter.

    As Western countries continue to grapple with a rising wave of populist sentiment, it is more than institutions such as the UN, EU, and NATO that are under immense pressure. Indeed, the very concepts and beliefs that form the foundation of these post-World War II constructs are under attack. A mix of state-sponsored active measures and disinformation campaigns in Western countries—which Russia is widely believed to be behind—and far-right political groups have merged in a common rejection of the belief that fervent nationalism is less appropriate in a world that has long been trending towards globalization. Labels such as ‘right-wing’ and ‘left-wing’ are increasingly irrelevant in terms of the efforts to dismantle the current international order—an order that, despite significant flaws, has provided enormous benefits and stability to the West.

    The March 15 general election in the Netherlands has become a focal point in this gathering of opponents to the EU and its policies, particularly as it relates to immigration and the refugee crisis. It is important not to underestimate how volatile the issues of immigration and refugees are, and the deliberate intertwining of these issues with fears of terrorism. Dutch authorities have been very clear in their concerns about Russian efforts to influence the election; they also believe Russia previously meddled in an April 2016 EU-related referendum that failed. The level of concern in the Netherlands over the possibility that Russian-backed cyber units would ‘hack’ the election results is significant enough that the country is reverting to an all paper election to avoid any appearance of interference. In February, the Dutch Interior Minister wrote to Parliament that, “The cabinet cannot exclude the possibility that state actors might gain advantage from influencing political decision-making and public opinion in the Netherlands and might use means to try and achieve such influence.” Fears of Russian interference in national elections in France and Germany have also been openly discussed by each countries’ respective security agencies and governments.

    The far-right campaign of Geert Wilders, whose Party for Freedom (PVV) has run on an anti-immigrant and anti-Muslim platform, has received notable financial support from similarly-minded individuals and groups in the U.S. As noted in The New York Times, in 2015 the ‘David Horowitz Freedom Center’—a right-wing foundation with a mission statement to work against “the efforts of the radical left and its Islamist allies to destroy American values”—was the single largest individual donor to all of Dutch politics. The group gave over €108,000 to PVV. Between 2015 and 2017, only three foreign donors gave money to Dutch political parties; two of those were American, and both essentially funded the PVV.

    The combination of Russia, which is determined to undermine the EU and NATO through its massive disinformation and cyber campaigns, and right-wing nationalist groups that are exploiting concerns over immigration, demographics, religion, and terrorism, has the EU on the ropes. Once a pattern of mistrust in all aspects of government intentions and policies takes root—whatever the instigator or cause—it becomes exceedingly difficult to use facts to counter the arguments. The upcoming 2017 European elections will be a test to see how countries can counter these converging trends.

  • capnkrunch

    I would buy the following shirts:
    -Words definitely mean things. Take THAT, Trump!
    -Facts exist. So do dick jokes. Wonkette!
    -That’s … not how any of this works.
    -Science … it’s not just a river in Egypt anymore!
    -I like my men like I like my grandfather clocks. With normal-sized hands!
    -Actually, Hillary Clinton won the popular vote.
    -Breitbart and Alex Jones lie a lot.
    -Don’t be mean.
    -You should not kick puppies.
    -If You Have A Signed Contract With Someone And They Fulfill Their Part Of It You -Should Pay Them What You Agreed On Instead Of Stiffing Them And Threatening To -Sue Them That’s A Dick Move Bro

    Make them!

    Also, isn’t telling how they think “democracy dies in darkness” is anti-Trump. What would be a pro-Trump shirt then? “Embrace the darkness. Gag the press.”?

  • Kiri the Paid Protestor

    (Picture of White House)
    This Ain’t No Party
    This Ain’t No Disco
    This Ain’t No Foolin’ Around

    • Ryliex

      I love that song. It’s disturbing that it seems predictive right now.

  • Notreelyhelping

    You say Sudetenland
    We say Durango

  • Truly Madly Derply

    Worst. PeeRESIDENT. Ever.

  • AJ Milne

    (Picture of printing press…)

    ‘This machine (also) kills fascists.’

    • Anna Elizabeth

      I wanted to get Booty Shorts with that printed on it, but I figured somebody would report me to the police.

  • undercover epicurean
  • BosGrl

    OT: Sean Spicer is just babbling on my TV right now. He is saying words but they don’t make any sense.

    • Roni Resistance Raven

      So it’s a day, then?

    • Crystalclear12

      Isn’t that a sign of a stroke?

    • Truly Madly Derply

      He studied at the “Sarah Palin School For Talkin’ Real Good You Betcha.”

  • Crystalclear12

    Wake me in 2020.

  • Crystalclear12

    No class ass.

    Short and accurate.

  • leemoder

    Ties shouldn’t go down to your dick.

    • Truly Madly Derply

      Ties as dick compensation = trouble for the nation

  • thewalkindude

    “Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.”

    Aldous Huxley

  • boyblue122

    A newspaper headline in what i assume is rural alabama

    https://twitter.com/JoyAnnReid/status/841708724288925696

    • boyblue122

      If you open up that twitter thread there are also headlines from newspapers in red states showing how many people are going to lose heathcare due to Trumpcare

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      But do the Trumpanzees realize they’re among the 24MM?

      • boyblue122

        good question

    • AncienReggie

      Everything is Alabama is rural.

  • Crystalclear12

    My God, what have we done!?
    Michigan state logo

  • Ms.MLG on Maui

    “It’s very hard to be a ten when you’re a piece of shit”

    OR

    “I voted and all I got was this lousy orange turd”

    • Truly Madly Derply

      Or “lousy orange pee squirt.” Cuz that rhymes with “tee shirt.”
      Aaaaand I’m just gonna go now.

  • Granny Sprinkles

    My favorite is “Facts exist. So do dick jokes. Wonkette!” with “Barack Obama was born in the United States” coming in a strong second.
    I would submit
    ·Children should have food. (I don’t care if their parents are bad people)*
    · Hittin’ folks is wrong, y’all. (Even when they disagree with you)*

    *parentheticals should be in tiny print

    • Claire

      “Unless they’re Nazis. Always be hitting Nazis.”

      • Eleanor Quirk

        But don’t sucker-punch.

  • Truly Madly Derply

    Clear and pee-resent danger.

  • NotReallyHere

    Grift is not a legitimate form of income.

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    Sphincter Spice is on the tv machine now. I challenge anyone in the universe of space and time to make rational sense of what he is saying about healthcare. He starts and stops and can’t finish thoughts and then deflects and it’s like the poor guy has had 30 cups of coffee since breakfast.

    • eyelashviper

      He prolly stands in the hallway before entering the room, with an IV full of horse tranquilizers, adderal, and something to encourage more conspiracies and jabber nonsense. No actual human could come up with such basura without chemical assistance.

    • Truly Madly Derply

      Well, healthcare,it turns out, is complicated.

      • Longstreet63

        Nobody knew that!

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Why doesn’t he just say “Trump lied to you. Deal with it suckers. We don’t care if you die. You don’t give us money anyway”. They would feel much better if they told the truth.

    • alpacapunchbowl

      Oh shit, he switched to caffeinated gum?

    • Nasty Candy Apple

      I refuse to take time out of my day to listen to liars.

  • pussygrabber in chief

    It’s sweet that the MSM is suddenly interested in democracy, journalism and truth. (No, I’m not bitter. Why do you ask?)

    • WeaselPoo

      Isn’t it, though? But the apparent ‘change’ is probably still about self-interest and monetizing trending public interest, rather than rediscovering any noble principles of the common good.

  • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

    “Media bias on full display??” Haha! Doesn’t Hannity openly fellatio Trump every night on his show?

    • Truly Madly Derply

      So then shouldnt it be spelled “bi-ass”? I’m thinking yes!

    • Mr. Blobfish

      What I heard was on Thursday night’s show, Hannity said the remaining Obama US attorneys should be fired. What does trump do Friday?

    • MissNomer

      *fellate

      • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

        D’oh. Thank you.

  • Yellow_Dog_Dem

    You keep using those words. I do not think they mean what you think they mean.

  • leemoder

    Sarcasm is a dish best served with a boot in your ass.

  • Eleanor Quirk

    I vote for the last one. I need an XL Tee anyway.

  • Mr. Blobfish

    The trains run on time

  • Amelia

    Science And Facts Are Not Conspiracies

    Maybe with #impeachthemotherfuckeralready on the sleeve. For flavor.

  • Ms.MLG on Maui

    “45-Also His IQ”

  • yyyaz

    1. He breaks it, we all pay for it.
    2. You don’t hire reptiles to drain swamps.
    3. We voted for a president, not a thief.
    4. So, how’s that democracy thing working? — Putin
    5. USA! No. 1 in The Third World!

    • MissNomer

      Amphibians, not reptiles.

      • kareemachan

        Hagfish…

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    Statements of plain facts are anti-Trump and a sign of media bias?
    At some point Fucks Gnus will become even more stupid than their viewers, and the viewers will notice.

    • JustDon’tSayDieInJail

      Facts have a liberal bias. Everyone knows that.

  • DensityDestiny

    In the end, progress always wins.

    • AncienReggie

      One can only hope.

    • SqueakyRat

      Sarcasm, right?

    • Regret

      Oh that is a good one!

  • Nasty Candy Apple

    That last, super long one is my favorite. SNAP OOH YA BURNT, TRUMP SUPPORTERS!

  • What Pierre said

    Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean your microwave’s not watching you

    • Sophia

      I was trying to think of one with a microwave in it. Thanks

      • What Pierre said

        My pleasure

    • What Pierre said

      Although I’d also buy the shit out of the Facts exist. So do dick jokes. Wonkette! one and the last one, the Dick Move Bro one.

  • yyyaz
    • Airborne libel!

      • Jonny On Maui

        And God said, “Let there be airborne!”

        And the gates of Hell were cast open and out came the demons in maroon berets and baggy pants…

  • WeaselPoo

    Don’t Pee On Me!

    Putin isn’t MY President!

    Twitter Isn’t a Branch of Government

  • BadExampleMan

    The grandfather clock one.

  • alpacapunchbowl

    I had a t shirt back in the 90s that read “It will be a great day when our schools get all the money they need and the air force has to hold a bake sale to buy a bomber”.
    Seems timely to bring that one back.

    • EKinDC

      I had a bumper sticker with the same except Navy and battleship! I bought a bike and the guy helping me attach the bike rack was a real dick about being from a military family. I then told him how my dad had fought in Vietnam, my grandfather was a pilot in WWII, and my great grandfather had lain, left for dead, for two days on the field at Thierry Woods so……

  • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

    War is Peace
    Freedom is Slavery
    Ignorance is Strength
    –President Trump

  • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

    Nazis Used to be the Bad Guys

    • alpacapunchbowl

      Or maybe “Nazis are still the bad guys”?

      • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

        Yes, that works too

  • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

    You’ve elected someone who thinks “Democracy Dies in Darkness” is a good thing

  • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

    “Nobody Knew Healthcare Could Be So Complicated”

    • Mike O’Day

      @catcafe:disqus
      You and @disqus_WTeY9x4BAz:disqus are my two current, neck & neck favorites!

  • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

    “Thank God we didn’t elect someone who made sure State Dept. emails were MORE secure”

  • Republicans: Like the KKK without the hoods.

  • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

    “Immigrants Get Things Done”

  • WeaselPoo

    I’m not just “sick of winning”, I’m going to die miserably and penniless because of it.

  • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

    “If Hillary was President, we’d all be tweeting spring recipes to each other”

  • Mavenmaven

    Unfortunately it won’t be too long before someone is let off the hook for shooting someone in an anti-Trump shirt.

    • JustDon’tSayDieInJail

      “He was on 5th Ave. He was asking for it!”

  • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

    “Why did the moron throw the clock out the window?”
    “Because clocks are FAKE NEWS”

  • WeaselPoo

    Your ‘brains’ got you a moran!

  • NotALiar

    Do the climate one. Plz make it 2x cuz my mom says I’m husky

  • What Pierre said

    Projection… not just a river in Egypt

  • Choosymom

    Can I have my Alternative President now?

    Also too, Don’t Be Mean and the long one.

  • boyblue122

    Guns dont kill people, republican heath care bills kill people

  • Panika MCD

    I really liked:
    Facts exist. So do dick jokes. Wonkette!

    Science … it’s not just a river in Egypt anymore!

    I like my men like I like my grandfather clocks. With normal-sized hands!

    You should not kick puppies.

    It is bad form to lust after your own daughter.

    and it’s:
    words have meanings. and when you put them together in certain orders, they mean certain inalienable things! ~ Stephen Dobyns’ purple period

  • leemoder

    Vote Quimby

  • Panika MCD

    you could get real dirty and go with John Wilmot, 2nd Earl of Rochester:


    God bless our good and gracious king–
    whose word no one relied on;
    who never said a foolish thing,
    nor ever did a wise one.

  • Panika MCD

    YA BURNT!

    that’s what we need on a shirt.

  • WeaselPoo

    How about….This Is Not A Slogan On A Tee Shirt ?

  • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

    If you think “Democracy Dies in Darkness” is biased, I’m sad for you, son

    • zerosumgame0005

      Putin’s personal mantra

    • BMW

      I got 99 problems, but a bitch ain’t one.

      • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

        Yep

    • Jack Tenhet

      I thought the same thing. That’s like saying “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” is a biased quote. It’s only biased against, well, evil.

  • Panika MCD

    PICK THIS ONE YOU WROTE EVAN:

    there’s wire tapps in your underwear…

    that would pee perfect.

    • zerosumgame0005

      there’s wire tapps in your underwear…and they are starting to short out from all the wetness!

    • Jim Johnson

      I can almost hear the pubic outcry.

  • Truly Madly Derply
    • zerosumgame0005

      love the pic but the words are black on his black coat so very very hard to read. maybe red or yellow?

      • Truly Madly Derply

        I thought of yellow but it seemed too gay, and not in the cool homo gay way, the antiquated gay/happy way. Although either version would work, really, in that I didn’t want any positive attributions. But I will be more mindful in future.

  • zerosumgame0005

    or even

    Pee Hookers ARE a Trump thing!

  • BMW

    Conversely, the t-shirt that says “No Fat Chicks” is obviously pro-Trump.

  • Khavrinen

    “you will decide on your favorite ones in the comments section (and even come up with your own!), and then we will cobble together a few “anti-Trump” t-shirts, with things on them that are just demonstrably true, and you may buy them from us in exchange for money!”

    And then we’ll eMail the full list to Faux & Frenemies, so they can bitch about it some more, and Wonkette can cash in on some free advertising masquerading as “journalism”, like Trump did all through the campaign.

  • NorthernSaber

    Folks- a gaudy, full-on orange Trump visage (angry, as always) with “KOMPROMAT” in Cyrillic underneath.

  • Jack Tenhet

    I like “Don’t be mean”. It’s just demonstratively true and transcends 45’s tenure.

    That said, why do these clowns think tee-shirts that don’t even mention 45 but state basic principles of truth and decency are anti. . . Oh, just answered my own question.

    • nightmoth

      I like “Don’t be mean,” but I can’t wear it, because, goshdarn it, I feel pretty fucking mean.

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    OK, this is my sign for the Science March. I will credit Wonkette

    “Science … it’s not just a river in Egypt anymore!”

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    So, they do realize that by saying “Democracy Dies in Darkness” and “Journalism Matters” and “Speaking Truth to Power” are anti-Trump they are admitting that he’s a lying fascist, right? hashtaghowdoesitwork

    • Robert James Nugent

      Those are some seriously and obviously anti-Trump slogans if you believe he’s a fascist. Hmm Fox and Friends what are you really saying.

      • Tiny kaiju

        They have no fucking idea. Ever.

  • AncienReggie

    Those slogans, best ev, Ev!
    Laughed out loud. (pardon me for speling that out.)

  • Occam’s 8 ball

    no puppet. no puppet. you’re the puppet.

  • How about:
    If this is winning, can we go back to losing?

    Or along those lines:
    If this is making America Great, we’re really more fucked than I thought

    • Hardly Ideal

      Just something with #SickOfWinning would work for me.

  • Ergoetal

    America: Trump’s Big New Toy

    • What Pierre said

      Or maybe, “I wish Trump had just bought a sports franchise to ruin”

  • nightmoth

    Let’s just revise all the old anti-Obama shirts: Show Trump with a bone through his nose and the word “Trumpcare,” picture Melania as a gorilla, etc. I would find that deeply satisfying.

  • whitroth

    Well, that one’s just wrong – Breitbart and Alex Jones don’t lie a lot. They don’t *NOT* lie.

  • whitroth

    Let’s get real. I want one that reads, “Save time: impeach Trump and Pence NOW”

  • Ergoetal

    Welcome to the world of Twitter, where WaPo editorials now come in a variety of colors and sizes.

  • Jim Johnson

    Trump the Bitch!!1!
    There now, isn’t that nice?

    • TA

      With the proper application of punctuation. “Trump, the bitch.”

  • CozyAtoZ

    love the t shirt ideas. What about one with “What the hell do you have to lose?’ After all we are finding out the answer to that each and every day.

    • Truly Madly Derply

      Then on the back list ALL the things we have to lose.

      • CozyAtoZ

        perfect.

  • Michael Loraine

    How about, instead of t-shirts, you sell Trump voodoo dolls? And Pence voodoo dolls? And Ryan, and McConnell voodoo dolls? GOP voodoo dolls would sell.

    • TA

      But don’t you need a little hair to make them work?

      • Michael Loraine

        Opinions differ. “Classic” voodoo would need some hair or nail clippings or blood or poop (eeewww) to be built into the doll. But if you can get several million people to stab Trump’s effigy in the face or heart or crotch, that’s community organizing!

      • Pisto75666

        No, a big hair works just as well.

        I’ll see myself out.

  • Jim Johnson

    Ssshhh… That creepy Dilbert guy will start talking about sweaters and manliness or some other stupid apparel nonsense.

  • What Pierre said

    Trumpcare: Making America self-medicate again

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    I want
    TInkle, tinkle,
    Little Czar,
    Putin put you
    Where you are.

  • Angela Ruzzo

    I’m not sure that t-shirts with words on them are any good, since it appears that Americans Can’t Read (a phrase that would make a good t-shirt logo). I put an ad on Craig’s List yesterday for a bike rack that holds TWO bikes, and I said it holds TWO bikes in the title, and I said it again in THREE places in the ad, once IN CAPS, and I have already been contacted by FOUR people who want a bike rack that holds FOUR bikes.

    • Truly Madly Derply

      This is why I stopped selling on eBay.

    • Pisto75666

      Words are hard!

    • Thorn Spike

      My mom bought me a t-shirt that said “Stop Reading My Shirt” when I worked at a library.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        My fave at an SF convention: “You don’t need to look at these breasts. These aren’t the breasts you’re looking for. Move along.”

  • Truly Madly Derply
    • phoenix00

      That’s so gross I loll’d and upvoted.

      • Truly Madly Derply

        Yesss. That’s what I was aiming for.

  • cafiene

    Trumpence: worst celeb couple ever
    Heil president Bannon

  • Debbie Cole

    My favorite: Normal human smiles don’t usually look like buttholes, #ScienceFact

    LOL!

  • Puck

    Words matter

  • I would happily wear the fuck out of:

    Science … it’s not just a river in Egypt anymore

  • Hardly Ideal

    Hm…

    Barack Obama was born in the United States.
    The President of the United States is not a king.
    Breitbart and Alex Jones lie a lot.
    It is bad form to lust after your own daughter.

    And it’s not on the list, but I felt like sharing:
    https://media.makeameme.org/created/am-i-the-j9hd8n.jpg

  • Tiny kaiju

    How about: Mean People Suck*
    *mean, stupid greedy people aren’t even capable of that rudimentary action. Seriously, sponges are more functional than these guys, and they only have one orifice and no alimentary canal.
    the print gets smaller as the message progresses.

  • Tiny kaiju

    What about the kind of generic “Tweets have consequences.Even stupid ones.”

  • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

    “Urine, it’s not just for breakfast anymore!”

    Also, too; I wear a XXX t-shirt, so put me down for the long one. It’ll fit on mine.

  • Natalie Frenshen

    I got cornholed by democracy and all I got was this lousy t shirt.

  • Scrofula

    I kind of just want a shirt with my credentials, followed by a “FUCK YOU GOP”.

  • honeywest

    Twatting is for Teens, not Presidents

  • Zyxomma

    PUTIN’S PUTO on an orange T-shirt. Make the Ts in both words gilded.

  • Celtic_Gnome

    Dick jokes, obviously.

  • CATMAN

    FOX has become a parody of itself when journalism and truth are decried as criticism of a politician–I swear Roger Ailes took the movie “Network” as a business plan instead of a satire

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      Just recently rewatched that classic. Paddy Chayefsky had a fucking time machine, I tell ya’!

      • CATMAN

        See if you can find “The Hospital”–dated but still a gem from Paddy+ George C Scott in it

  • Joy

    My Pussyhat brings all the boys to the yard…

    • LesBontemps

      Is it better than mine?

      • SprinklemagicResistancebuns

        Damn right.

  • hvdv

    Nobody tapped that ass.

  • phoenix00

    Please sell AOT,K

  • Alt-dog

    Do one about the sandwich:

    Trump Special — white bread, full of bologna, with Russian dressing and a tiny pickle.

    • JParkerSD46

      Another Trump Special – Horsecock sandwich.

  • Tosca

    “When you throw a stone into a pack of dogs, the one that yelps is the one that got hit”.

  • IndigoSnap

    “Facts exist” & “Global warming still is real” please!

  • Amy!

    I have a proposal, but it might not be terribly clever.

    65,853,516 [48.2%] :: this line in blue
    – 62,984,825 [46.1%] :: this line in red
    = 2,868,691 [ 2.1%] :: this line struck through
    = 304 :: this line also struck through
    = 306 [historic LANDSLIDE!!]

    (and on the back, in parentheses, capital letters, quotated: still more than the five bush got)

    ETA: there are spaces in there to line things up, but they don’t work, because html, duh, amy dumm today. anyway, yeah, should look like simple math problem with one answer two answers struck out, and it’s kinda contrived and maybe not great but what the hell, right?

  • bphoon

    1. That’s…not how anything works.
    2. It is bad form to lust after your daughter.
    3. The long one, the one about signed contracts
    4. @realdonaldtrump I thought Presidents didn’t have time to tweet bullshit all night.

  • Jesse

    Fox News: Speaking Douche to Baggy Since 1996.

  • Jim

    I’ve seen a ton of these shirts popping up but the fastest most current designs are from
    http://www.teerumptees.com These guys must never sleep. It’s two canadian guys with really sarcastic humor and they’re dropping a new shirt each day. The upside down flag one was hilarious.

  • JackFlackett

    So maybe this one too: I survived the Bowling Green Massacre and all I got was this lousy president

    • Christopher Story

      This!

  • Truly Madly Derply
  • Chayne

    TrumpCare: You have Cancer? Take Two Aspirin and Call Me When Your Dead. 💀

  • Jeff Mc Donald

    Eat Pork: Because people who don’t are going to hell.

    • Christopher Story

      There are so many reasons I’m going to hell.

      • Uhclem49

        I hope to go to hell. That’s where all my friends will be.

        • Christopher Story

          I’ll make sure to save you a seat!

    • Amber M

      Roflao….i peed a little

  • Christopher Story

    I know it’s not original, but I would really like to see: “This pussy grabs back” on a teeshirt.

  • motmelere

    304 > 271
    Suck it, Bush.

  • motmelere

    No U.S. President has died in prison.
    That would be…historic.

  • motmelere

    I’m not afraid to say it,
    “Funding RADICAL ISLAMIC TERRORISM” is a felony.

  • Red Bellied Black Shake

    Dear Trump and Administration- The End Is Nigh.

    Or

    Trump – De-Greating America

    Hmm I think that’s already a hat.

  • Red Bellied Black Shake

    Deep State Rising

  • Rickyphoo

    I think I’d go with:

    Go fuck yourself, Trump!

    But maybe, I’m just in a bad mood.

    • (Major_Major_Major)ly_Pissed

      Can’t fault the classics.

  • arglebargle

    Late entry: I voted in the 2016 election and all I got was this lousy “President”.

  • Martha Johnson

    If he says it three times, it’s still a lie.

  • I want this one: “That’s … not how any of this works.”

  • NokoMarie

    Shut the f*ck up, Donnie!

    • SprinklemagicResistancebuns

      And I would add: You’re outta your element!

  • NokoMarie

    Make Puerto Rico the Deep State

  • Amy Beaudoin

    My shirt is nice, but still necessary. Resist the erosion of our rights and democracy. Persist. https://pinkcatyarn.com/products/nevertheless-she-persisted-cat-hat-short-sleeved-t-shirt?variant=25173160389

  • Who You Calling Snowflake?

    Made in China:
    Just like my shirts & ties and Ivanka’s clothing line.

  • Hazel Blumberg

    USA: owned by Russia, China, and Azerbaijan.

  • whotookmymittens?

    You had me at dick jokes. Crank ’em out!

  • Peggy

    ROFL Normal human smiles don’t usually look like buttholes, #ScienceFact

    • irishdave3

      Butt what does the Rule Of F*cking Law really mean?

  • Peggy
  • irishdave3

    The Trump Hump had a Great Wall. The Trump Hump had a Greal Fall, the Winter, not so much….

  • irishdave3

    All the Way with Donald J…did your toaster oven mention you were a dick?

  • Amber M

    Trumplethinskin he’s our man…..
    If he can’t do it….
    Figures.

  • sorbs

    #STFUPOTUS

  • Being in Alaska, “Oh, is it cold where you are? Global warming still is real.” is my favorite!

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