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That thing last night: wasn’t it HIDEOUS? Didn’t you know from his first words, when he said “hey, maybe can it with the knocking over Jewish headstones,” that the media was going to fall all over itself about how “presidential” he was? Van Jones, sadly, I am looking at YOU.

BUT! What we didn’t think we’d see today was a whole mess of “regular people,” as focus grouped by none other than Frank Fucking Luntz, who had a hell of a lot more to say — correctly — than the pundits did. They were not buying his bullshit! Not even for a second! (Well, a few guys did, for a second, and they were SHOUTED DOWN by people who KNOW THE SCORE.) We know you never watch the videos, but make like an Abba song and Take a Chance on this one! It’s FUN!

OOOH BOY they are SPITFIRES! Whenever any of them are incorrect, the others hoot and shout him down with FACTS! Like, one dude says “hey, he gave an olive branch to the Democrats,” and they are like NO HE DID NOT, HE SAID THEY HAD TO WORK WITH HIM, and then another guy claims the Congressional Black Congress wouldn’t even meet with poor President Trump and the big black woman is all NUH UH UH and she backs it up with the real facts of the matter — that they had sent him a letter in JANUARY and he STILL HASN’T RESPONDED TO IT, and she is not having that dude’s JIVE. (She didn’t say “jive,” but she didn’t even need to, she was so rad and good and loud and facty.)

Frank Luntz: “OKAY, WE’RE NOT ALL GOING TO JUMP ON MARK AT ONE TIME.”

No, they will TAKE TURNS.

And this is how we must all be, every single fucking day, when we are met with half-baked alternafacts from people who get their info from Alex Jones or Trump (same thing) and shout them all down with TRUTH, and also #RESIST.

[CBS]

Help Wonkette #RESIST (with money).

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  • marxalot

    I am trying to actually watch this video (for once!) but I think maybe my rabid privacy badger won’t let me.

  • DahBoner
  • kindness

    Who would want to sit down with Frank Lutz to try to help Republican messaging? Not me.

    • TJ Barke

      Tell us how to lie more effectively to you.

    • puredog

      Is that the same Lutz as Lutz Tavern? (PBR insider joke)

  • MynameisBlarney
    • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

      Well that made me guffaw, even though of COURSE he hasn’t actually set foot in an actual college. Thank you.

      • Lance Thrustwell

        He did attend a real college, but washed out.

        • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

          Ah, thank you, missed that part. Still mobidly funny though.

    • ButtercuptheHarelessRabbit

      Sizzler Steak manager class, 4 year Bachelor’s degree…. Meh. Same diff, right?

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Oh my god what a tool. Blames his own college failure on ‘liberal professors’, then tries to pass off a fucking restaurant training program as a degree.

    • Iron Monkey

      So the Sizzler management training program is overrun with liberal professors. Amazing what you can find out.

      • WotsAllThisThen

        He should have saved his money and gone to Hamburgler Community College.

        • Skeptical_thinker

          Trump University?

        • wavicles

          Trump University shoulda got him in the draft.

    • OrG

      Not news.A rethug telling the truth? THAT’S news.

      • Lord Jim

        Is there an email alert I can sign up for? I say this with absolutely no worries about getting spammed by that list.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Isn’t the first thing they teach you in business school that you don’t sell the steak, you sell the sizzler?

      • MynameisBlarney

        That is some A1 advice there.

        • WotsAllThisThen

          Don’t get saucy with me!

        • BigBoppa ~ Résistent

          You have a rare sense of humor.

          • willi0000000

            well done!

          • Celtic_Gnome

            I get here so long after the puns start that I can never ketchup.

          • JCfromNC

            That’s my only beef with pun threads as well.

    • Univ. of Sizzler, home of the “Fightin’ Endless Shrimp”

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        Their rivalry with Ruby Tuesday Tech is the stuff of legends.

        • Great rivals in the Salad Bar League

          • WotsAllThisThen

            I saw them face off in the Pasta Bowl. Their sneeze guard had to be carried off the field after a hard tackle.

    • WotsAllThisThen
      • wavicles

        Go Cows!

    • FlownΩver

      Raw meat for Colbert, Bee, Myers, Oliver, et al.

      These days there’s so much Republican derp we’ll all get tired of Republican derp comedy.

    • Kiri the Paid Protestor

      “The Senate Republicans’ website states that the lawmaker ‘attended the
      University of California at Riverside majoring in astro-physics,
      geo-physics and mathematics.'”

      …Before he went to work at Sizzler. Oh yeah, we got a real rocket surgeon here!

      http://pinkie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/rsz/mlfw4816_small.jpg

      • BearDeLaOursistance

        I was going to devil’s-advocate by asking if he graduated during an economic downturn, similar to the one that recently drowned a lot of late-Millennials’ prospects. And then I realized that even if he did… he still became a Republican. Derp assessment intact.

      • SayItWithOtters

        He sure declared a lot of majors during his one year of college.

        • bobbert

          Yeah. Nobody majors in more hat two things. Also, at real colleges (of which UC-R is certinly one) you don’t really have a major(s) until your junior year.

      • Rags

        There is no course in the ucr catalog for ‘geo-physics’ and only one gut course mentioning ‘astro-physics’. And anyone who hyphenates these terms are a Moran.

    • Oblios_Cap

      A certificate, akin to one from Hamburger U. How edumacational.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      “Iowa State Republicans spokesperson Ed Failor…”

      Oh crap … time to rinse the keyboard again.

    • tomamitai

      At least he didn’t go to hamburger college like a commoner!

    • Trump U!

    • wavicles

      What did $45 say?
      “My net worth is whatever I feel it is that day.”

      I’m a scholar too! I got a certification when I was 16 on how to put PVC pipe together.

  • Bill D. Burger
  • elviouslyqueer

    If that black woman’s side-eye could’ve killed, that loud Latina woman would’ve been pushing up a field of daisies in two seconds flat.

  • Iron Monkey

    “This is not on the job training”. Amazing no one has said that before.

  • Bill D. Burger
    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      Oh yeah, well where was Obama on 9/11 huh?? And why didn’t he snipe Bin Laden from a window in the Oval Office before that even happened?

      • Crank Tango

        Forging his birf certificate in Kenya, that’s where.

    • Wild Cat

      To be fair, this archetype lives in a place that offers zero industry, has no idea where Detroit is, thinks he could perform the job of Special Ops forces on his own, and never feels he’ll become sick or disabled. He simply wants to drag those who function normally in our high-pressure society into his Own Private Swamplandia.
      And he won.

    • Thiazin Red

      Don’t forget abortion and gays!

    • Lord Jim

      You don’t understand. It’s DEMOCRATS’ fault for making them vote the way they do. Because we’re so snotty and shouty and call them terrible names for supporting a narcissist, racist, sexfiend demagogue. WHY WON’T YOU GET IT?!

  • elviouslyqueer

    Also too, Frank Luntz’s face looks like a Jell-O pudding that’s been run through a blender set on frappe.

    • dslindc

      I’ve met him. Can confirm.

    • Wild Cat

      Don’t worry. He’ll pay Jeff Gannon Guckert his $750/hour to slurp his face clean.

    • FlownΩver

      Is this the real Frank Luntz? If so, where’d I leave that rusty chainsaw OF VOTES?

  • Iron Monkey

    I got about 90 seconds into (one and one-half minutes more than was necessary) but couldn’t take any more of Frank Luntz.

    • Oblios_Cap

      I know that feeling. Why in the hell do they give that asshole airtime?

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Those poor folks had to put up with Trump AND Luntz at the same time – no wonder they were cranky. I hope they were paid well.

    • tomamitai

      His attempts to pretend he’s not in the tank for republicans are so lame, if they were a race horse they’d be sent to the glue factory.

  • puredog

    In this hilarious article, Neil Irwin explores why the Rethuglicans cannot seem to get any traction, legislation-wise.

    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/02/28/upshot/why-the-trump-agenda-is-moving-slowly-the-republicans-wonk-gap.html

    • ltmcdies

      So basically the GOP don’t know how to do their jobs…
      Just like their boss

      • WotsAllThisThen

        Knowing how to do the job was never a requirement for getting elected.

      • The Wanderer

        They are doing their job. Their job is to wreck all the institutions.

    • Thank FSM they are too stupid to do anything

    • SayItWithOtters

      Lol. Because electing exterminators and hog castrators and grifty preachers doesn’t really give you much of an intellectual bench here in the real world.

  • dslindc

    We know you never watch the videos, but make like an Abba song and Take a Chance on this one! It’s FUN!

    Too soon after Sweden! #neverforget

    • Lord Jim

      So the Bowling Green Massacre is old news now? Why do you care more about Swedish people than your own fellow ‘Muricans?

      • dslindc

        I am a pinko commie or some such reason, probably.

        • Pilotshark

          speaking about pinko commies, there was not a whole lot of RED ties and coats, that all seem to be blue?

          could it be they didn`t want any thing to point towards the big red machine of putin`s.

          /smiles

      • Crystalclear12

        You know Kellyanne Conway died their, right?

      • Holly

        Hey! I’m Swedish! We deserve a modicum of respect. We are the inventors of Swedish Fish, H&M, and Ikea. Swedish Fish will pull the fillings right outta your head. H&M clothing is so poorly made that the material disintegrates and falls apart in one washing. and Ikea furniture will fall apart during the fantastically super easy assembly process. I almost forgot….Saab (excellent fighter jet not the car) Go Sweden! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NSFIpD1xxmI

        • Lord Jim

          Ya got me :)

        • dslindc

          I love Swedish Fish and I’ve owned 2 Saabs (the cars, not the jets)!

          • Holly

            Don’t tell anyone, OK? Swedish Fish and Sour Patch KIds are my favorite candy and I eat bags of them (my teeth need work). The best car I ever owned was a 1999 Saab 9-5. She rolled 225,000 miles without a single mechanical hitch. Just as she was a mechanical beast she was also driven by three teenagers so her outward beauty quickly faded. We called her Kemosaabi.

          • dslindc

            Nice! I had a 1999 9-3 that I bought used when I graduated college the first time. I replaced it with a 2006 9-3 a few years later. Both were such fun cars!

          • Holly

            This is exactly what happened when GM tried to “fix” something that was already far superior to anything these fuckers EVER made.

            https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/05d5f34144c06a11eb980f55263bf6e5f64b51387f9e933456ab2cc7055a23c6.jpg

        • Mr. Food Genius

          So you are swedish, more fuel for the fire Im going to build for you.

  • Resistance Fighter Astraea

    “Is this the real X” is a trick question when you’re asking about a con man.

  • boyblue123

    The CBS audience looks aware of their surroundings though, they dont have their eyes all glazed over.

    They clearly didnt get a proper sampling of Drumpf voters

    • Or CBS viewers

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Although the ignorant loudmouthed latina bigot was a nice touch.

      • elviouslyqueer

        “They ALL come here, have a child, and looking for a handout.”

        Bitch, stand up just so I can tell you to sit your ass back down in all the seats.

        • Carpe Vagenda

          I swear, Republicans don’t get how identity politics work. If that woman wants to tell me how her background informs her experience of american society, mazel tov. Come sit by me. If she’s there because you folks think bullshit stereotypes about immigrants sound more authentic with an accent, both you and she can go fuck yourselves.

        • boyblue123

          hahaha

        • Unnamed_and_MaybeFake

          I sensed a woman who has a sister that owes her money.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    and here, https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/edc776a3d848ea2bb3076a34408a9459ab22df57d43fa681405123f4bf378df6.jpg Chris “I will never know a day when I am not a towering monument to mendacious mediocrity” Cillizza tops off a day of stanning for Trump on twitter

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Cillizza isn’t satisfied with being a double digit entry on the tumbrel list, no, he wants to crowd Chuckles the Toddler out of Toddler’s spot.

      • Oblios_Cap

        I notice his column is appropriately title “The Fix”. As in “The Fix is in.”

    • tomamitai

      It’s good to be Steve Bannon right now

      Why, is there an open bar in the White House?

  • Thaumaturgist

    I’ve already posted this today but we can forgive Trump telling us we can’t attack the Joos as long as he doesn’t tell us we have to stop firebombing mosques. There’s such a thing as too much freedom of
    religion.

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω

    Chelgren has said that he based the bill on his own experiences with “liberal professors.”

    Hubba, hubba in the back room at the Sizzler!

  • Villago Delenda Est

    White people are so fucking stupid.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Actually, weren’t most of the really egregious comments from the elderly asian gentleman and the latina lady?

      • Villago Delenda Est

        I was thinking of that git who insisted that the CBC never contacted Donald when in fact they had, and Donald STILL has not responded to a letter they sent more than a month ago.

        • Scrofula

          He was probably thinking about that black reporter at the last presser. She was supposed to set it up, with her black people rolodex.

        • Carpe Vagenda

          Oh, yeah. The one we’re not going to jump on because he’s repeating Frank Luntz’ talking points.

      • And that dude that sounded suspiciously Nazi like…

        • Carpe Vagenda

          Oh, I thought that was elderly asian gentleman.

    • Wild Cat

      You were name-dropped on LGM this a.m.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        I didn’t feel a thing! Must have been a soft landing!

    • WomanInThePersistence

      We sure are.

    • Juan de Fuca

      Cash me outside, how ’bout dat?

  • Jamoche

    Missing plug-in. I assume it’s the usual battery-sucking virus vector.

    • Anna Rompage

      Flash player

      • Jamoche

        Like I said ;)

  • boyblue123

    OT – Found the next democrat that needs to be primaried. Gabbard is going on Russia Today now

    https://twitter.com/RT_America/status/837037231760093190

    • Carpe Vagenda

      I swear, we should have kept the witch lady. At least she was amusing.

      • She was GOP. This one is supposedly D. But probably closer to to DINO

        • Carpe Vagenda

          This one is in bed with Russia and votes with Republicans. I’m not sure what the downside of witch lady would be. At least she’d be one less awful example for Cenk to point at when he goes after centrists from swing states.

          • bobbert

            Thing is, Hawai’i is a deep blue state.

    • We have team Maui here…maybe one of them can run?

      • boyblue123

        even if they dont, maybe they know someone who is a good alternative to Gabbard

    • The Wanderer

      “Stop Arming Terrorists Act?” So she advocates taking guns away from the bombs-n-Jesus crowd up in Idaho and other bits of Murka?

      • boyblue123

        no, no, no…not *those* terrorists. The other ones

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        Of course not! You can’t be a terrorist if you’re white or Christian – it’s in the terrorist bylaws…..

      • Jim Johnson

        Disarm the “Radical Anti-islamic Terrorists”?
        It’s about time.

    • Eileen Besse

      So much shit crammed into a living body. SAD. #PRIMARY!!!

    • Unnamed_and_MaybeFake

      Maybe she can borrow Michele Fiore’s bra holster for the trip.

    • clubseal

      Stop arming terrorists? But how will we protect our freedoms?! And our wives and daughters?

    • theblackdog

      She was also talking on Twitter about how wonderful Trumps speech was last night.

  • Shucky Ducky
    • TJ Barke

      Everybody shut up! Shut up, Lutz!

  • Wild Cat

    4:20. Time to get arrested.

    • Clyde Barrow

      Jeff Sessions is busy drinking his Ensure and getting his Depends changed, so you’re safe for now.

  • Unnamed_and_MaybeFake

    Was that video filmed at Spicey’s last news gaggle?

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    Andrew Rosenthal does a nice, polite hatchet job on Il Douche’s speech recital:
    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/03/01/opinion/donald-trump-master-of-low-expectations.html

    “If Trump did nothing about immigration, he could cross “uncontrolled entry” off his list because it’s not happening and it never has. Under Trump’s leadership, there won’t be any flying pigs, either, and Bigfoot will finally be prevented from tracking his muddy footprints through the Capitol Rotunda.”

    • writersbloc

      Good piece- scary to think the time will come when Trump will take credit for improving all the imaginary problems he invented for his base.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    Anybody else getting ” this plugin is not supported”?

    • Yup. With a random puzzle piece

      • WomanInThePersistence

        I’ve been up since 2:30 (stupid inventory), so I am not feeling confident in my perceptive abilities.

    • Anna Rompage

      It’s running on flash, so I think if you’re on an Apple device, it will likely not load…

      • WomanInThePersistence

        I’m on Android.

      • Jamoche

        Most videos have HTML5 fallbacks these days. This doesn’t.

    • Clyde Barrow

      Every time I look at Trump’s hair…

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Ftw!

      • leemoder

        Ba-BOOM!

  • Anna Rompage

    Trump really hates this photo where his double chin looks like a saggy, stretched out scrotum, so be sure not to share it…

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/c738f3900e564d036285db05cc9b19a4580ec82081b6d655ce3b463222ca2323.jpg

  • Resistance Fighter Astraea

    When asked about the speech DNC Chair Perez sarcastically clapped: “oh, he read a TelePrompTer!! It’s like my kid ate and didn’t spill!”

    • laughingnome

      Good response.

    • WomanInThePersistence

      I’m liking this guy. Perez, not Trump, obviously.

      • Resistance Fighter Astraea

        Looks like he’s not going to hold back in the name of “civility” or in fear of being called bad names by the press, who were going to call democrats those bad names anyway!

      • Flashman

        Whose call was it to have Gov. Brashears give the response? That was less than genius.

        • SecludedCompound

          It’s the old “trot out the pasty menz to try to appeal to the angry pasty menz” thing. THAT REALLY WORKS GUYS.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    We know you never watch the videos, but make like an Abba song and Take a Chance on this one! It’s FUN!

    Oh, this is good. Definitely watch if you can!

    • WomanInThePersistence

      I’m not able to see it. Is it on the YouTube?

      Eta – I looked. Didn’t see it. But I want to!!!

      • Resistance Fighter Callyson

        I don’t see this exact clip, but here’s what a YouTube search found. The first and fourth clip here include the same people at the same event, so you might try those.

      • Lambsendbeds

        Me neither – it figures that the one time I want to watch the video I just get a big blank space.
        >:-(

    • timpundit

      I got embarrassed and laughed at the same time when I read that. I don’t watch many vids because I am at work.

    • Mojopo

      How did the nice and smart resistance fighters remain so civil? I would have been throwing chairs. They were wonderful people.

      • Resistance Fighter Callyson

        I wanted to strangle that Latina who immediately and repeatedly interrupted the guy who was correcting her. No one interrupted you, asshole!

  • CogitoErgoBibo

    I like weird Euro-accent guy at the end when he was talking about our nation having been damaged and the need to return to the rule of law. That’s part of what has been mind-blowing to me regarding the immigration EO. This is the sort of shit you see in countries who don’t claim any adherence at all to rule of law.

    • laughingnome

      Luntz can be blamed for some of the damage.

      • Scrofula

        Does anyone know if he freelance consults? I mean, does he just follow the cash or have his own agenda? Beside making me uncomfortable when I see Patton Oswalt.

        • laughingnome

          I’m sure he consults with corps and right wing pols. Could be wrong and I’m not interested enough to look it up.

        • Villago Delenda Est

          He’s a Rethug operative.

          • Scrofula

            See, I don’t know which is worse. Ratfucking for the highest bidder, or ratfucking in pursuit of a terrible cause.

    • Clyde Barrow

      He reminds me of the Heaven’s Gate leader, ‘Do’.

    • ltmcdies

      yeh I wonder how attached he was to the “rule of law” when Obama was president.

    • Marceline

      I’d like to know what country he’s from.

  • HogeyeGrex

    These two focus groups really summed up the night for me.
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6db6988d61bde7486d9d1d25828c5c9eeaa7737944bdf8d89865bc153f6c6392.jpg
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C5zUrYTU8AIEIHW.jpg
    Kennedy’s death-ray eyes give me some small hope for future SC decisions, and the Marine on the right is about to fucking levitate on sheer anger.

    • laughingnome

      Looks like the Politburo just after a purge.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      I don’t think I’ve ever seen a picture of Roberts looking so confused.

      • HogeyeGrex

        “Holy fuck. I think he might be serious.”

      • LaylaOhGee

        I’m amazed that his face is capable of changing its expression! You can see the “Holy fuck!” in his slightly furrowed brow.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        “My legacy! It’s toast!”

    • Clyde Barrow

      The generals look like they are looking at their new Russian uniforms, saying “Yuck!”

    • Scrofula

      Isn’t that just resting marine-face?

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        I don’t think they’re too happy, after trump blamed them for the fuckup that was that woman’s son’s death…

      • HogeyeGrex

        Someone on twitter called it “resting coup face”

      • UncleTravelingMatt

        I think so. Neller (the Marine on the Right) always looks like that.

        • jowgajen

          It’s the Navy guys that look murderous to me.

    • jowgajen

      Kagan’s “You have got to be fucking kidding me” face is priceless.

      Is that Kamala next to Bernie?

      • HogeyeGrex

        Looks like it.
        Sotomayor looks like she’d rather be boiled in oil than have to listen to this shit. I want to see what RBG was doing.

        • Resistance Fighter Astraea

          Apparently she didn’t go.

          • HogeyeGrex

            Good on her.

        • Villago Delenda Est

          She was tipping back a single malt, munching popcorn, and thinking “you suckers!”

        • Courser_Resistance

          I hope to fuck she has a food-taster in place, since she had the gall to criticize the Cheeto before the election. She had to apologize, but that don’t mean shit to the Shitgibbon. I’m worried what with Russians dropping dead hither and yon across the pond (well and here too.)

        • cmd resistor

          Afriend sent me this today, written by a guy who tried to get through one of the workouts RBG does with her personal trainer ex military guy 3 times a week. Made me feel better. http://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2017/02/rbg-ruth-bader-ginsburg-workout-personal-trainer-elena-kagan-stephen-breyer-214821

        • Flashman

          RBG reported decided not to resign last year, confident that Hillary would appoint her successor. I hope she was home doing cardio-vascular exercises.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      The Generals and Admirals don’t look very happy.

    • Courser_Resistance

      Justice Sotomayor kind of looks like she’s doing a great buzzard imitation.

    • Iron Monkey

      Look like a bunch who will promise free and fair elections after civil unrest is defeated and discipline restored.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Civil unrest is not the problem Uncivil unrest by politicians with an R after their names is.

    • OrdinaryJoe

      Does not feel good that the two with the biggest WTF looks on their faces are the two Marine Corps generals.

      • Miles Monroe

        The Navy guy–admiral?–in front of Sanders looks like he’s trying as hard as he can not to lose it …

        • Rachel Book Harlot

          He’s my favorite of all of them because he is so disgusted that he can’t even look at Trumpkins. I can definitely relate to that.

    • Weevie

      Kagan nailed it. The brass are planning armageddon.

  • TheGrandWazoo2

    Russian sounding guy: “Is time you worked with us.”

  • Man, how much better would the world be if Frank Luntz never existed?

    http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/simpsons/images/9/9b/Best-simpsons-gifs-world-without-lawyers.gif

  • timpundit

    I can almost hear the angry derision of republicans for trump using a teleprompter, can’t you? I’m sure that criticism is building even as I type.

  • An Outhouse for the Resistance

    If we can’t JUMP ON MARK AT ONE TIME, can we HOP ON POP?

    • Courser_Resistance

      Why don’t ALL of us HOP on McFuckstick at the same time?? Maybe he’ll asplode? Um… all the votes jump on McFuckstick?

    • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

      Mark barks!
      No Mark, No!
      Don’t bark that!

    • Mojopo

      PS – sorry about the typos. I was all het up and lost the edit window.

    • H0mer0

      “STOP!””You must not HOP on POP!”

      (also, “dad is sad, very very sad
      he had a bad day
      what a day dad had.”)

  • Mojopo

    HI, Rebecca – just dropping buy to say I watched the video. Wow!

    What is this “we need civility” bullshit from Luntz? When someone lies to your face, or makes horrible statements against minorities and women, are we supposed to thank Trump for his attention to these matters? Hell no! I’m sorry, I mean, OH HELL NO!

    Trump is a monster who can never be trusted, and the people who voted a man who humiliated a handicapped journalist do not deserve civility. Shame on them all!

    • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

      Apropos of nothing – I still make that porkchop and wilted salad regularly. I get requests for it. Scrolled past your name and thought Chops! So I just wanted to say thanks. ;)

      • Mojopo

        What a cool thing to say. Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it. I’ve been banned from making that at home when the windows are closed, after someone has washed her hair. Turns out that not everyone likes smelling like pork chops. Who knew?

        • Villago Delenda Est

          Well, when every dog in the neighborhood greets you in an over enthusiastic fashion, you can get pretty tired of it.

        • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

          Oh that’s funny. I just recently made it at a new location and set off the smoke detectors. Worth it!

        • Lambsendbeds

          Unpossible!

        • Peripatetic Poltroon

          Radical Islamic Terrorists?

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      AMEN!

  • tinker12

    Did anyone else hear Frank Luntz say “We will preserve the loss of civility” because I sure did.

  • Jack Tenhet

    The bar is set so low here, it reminds me of that line about Henry Lamb in Tom Wolfe’s “Bonfire of the Vanities”, which is a good read on it’s own merits.

    “You’re thinking about ‘honor students’ and ‘higher achievers’ and all
    that […]. But at Colonel Jacob Ruppert High School, an honor student is
    somebody who attends class, isn’t disruptive, tries to learn, and does
    all right at reading and arithmetic.’

    ‘Well, let’s use that standard. By that standard, is Henry Lamb an honor student?’

    ‘By that standard, yes.”

    So even by that low standard, 45 isn’t even close to being an honor student.

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    I loved it when that idiot in Florida told his constituents “there are death panels in Obamacare. If you’re over 74 then you have to go before a death panel.” They all laughed and booed him. It filled my heart with joy!

    • eyelashviper

      He deserved more than a booing, a tarring and feathering would have been better.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        I like where your head is at on this one.

        • eyelashviper

          I will bring feathers, pitchforks and other stuff, gladly.

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      But then he goes “Children! Children!” and asks “who’s actually read the ACA?” and when dozens of people raise their hands he dismisses them like children AGAIN, “I highly doubt that.” Seriously, the only silver lining to all this, is, as jaded as I am, I truly had NO idea how absolutely venal, corrupt and unAmerican these terrible assholes were. I second eyelash’s vote for a tarring and feathering, with votes of course.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        I knew the GOP had become a venal and corrupt party owned by banks and oil companies, but I always thought if push came to shove, they would put the country’s interests above their own, EVENTUALLY. After all this Russian stuff, I’m beginning to see that they truly don’t give a crap if the country turns into a straight up Christofacsist kleptocracy.

        • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

          Right? Me too! I could never believe that they were simply cheesy liars and thieves only in it for the grift.

  • ltmcdies
  • Iron Monkey

    So the President of the United States didn’t froth at the mouth and speak in tongues while addressing Congress. This is what passes for statesmanlike or “Presidential” in 2017.

    • ltmcdies

      can a bar for speechifying be any lower

      • House0fTheBlueLights

        So low a double-jointed Chinese acrobat couldn’t limbo under it. (h/t FB)

      • phoenix00

        Speeches in actual bars rate higher.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      The Village’s standards are appallingly low.

      • disqus_lWwzrwNaw6

        It isn’t that they have standards, because actually they don’t.

        They operate according to a Life Cycle, and their Life Cycle told them that after a few weeks of saying Mean Bad Things about Donald, it was time for everybody to sit back with delighted smiles and astonished eyes and shout “Wow! He sure foxed us!”

        This was a Wow Correction in the Beltway Press Corp’s Life Cycle.

        There is not a Wow Correction for Democratic presidents–for them the Life Cycle veers back and forth between Should Invite More Republicans Into Cabinet To Ensure Bipartisanship (on the one hand), and Wouldn’t Have Gotten Into Trouble If He’d Had More Republicans In His Cabinet, (on the other).

        But for Republicans, the Life Cycle goes back and forth between Brief Feeding Frenzy About Some Scandal That Suddenly Vanishes Into The Memory Hole, and the Wow Correction. Donald had definitely reached Wow Correction territory by last night.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          Also too, still trying to convince him to attend WHCA dinner.

          • disqus_lWwzrwNaw6

            Yeah, this is bizarre. Just bizarre.

          • Jonny On Maui

            I hope he doesn’t go. I hope this administration doesn’t send anyone. Then use cardboard cutouts to point at and laugh. That should help with the crazy ones’ aneurysm.

        • Little Lulu Ω

          Immediately after the first Bush-Gore debate the press were just so impressed that Bush was coherent and acting so very smart and not a idiot the entire time that the consensus was that he won the debate. Trump reads aloud from a TelePrompTer and the consensus among the press is that he was presidential. Nobody mocked him for saying “mooslim” or “anti-semetic” or “nookyuler”; but had President Hillary Clinton stumbled over a word or pronounced any of those three words the Trump Way, the press would have focused only on those missteps and nothing else. I’m going home.

          • Isaac Heston

            Al Gore said he invented the internet!

    • Lotus954

      So the guy proved he could read from a teleprompter (which was actually a revelation because I didn’t think he could read) and for the first time, he didn’t go off on a tangent. That’s what makes you Presidential?

  • Marceline

    That woman from Guatemala made me feel all throat punchy. One thing this election brought home is just how self-hating assimilation can make you and the machinations someone will put themselves through in order to be “one of the good ones.”

    • H0mer0

      IK,R? How can they say “everyone else” is just asking for a handout? Do they really think that people needing income support so their kids can have a roof over their head and a few calories in their stomach so they can pay attention in school “want free stuff”? (sadly, yes, and that was rhetorical.)It’s like the black repubs and douche d’souza. They still aren’t letting you in their country clubs.

      • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

        Log Cabin Republicans, too

  • ltmcdies
    • Villago Delenda Est

      Cripes, my eyes! Rolled out again!

    • SayItWithOtters

      Well. That pretty much sums up the situation we’re all in.

    • shaar dula

      slowly slowly take the person’s head out of his ass and put it in front of his face .

    • phoenix00
    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      And which won the Academy Award, just like Donald Trump won the election.

  • Lambsendbeds

    Waaaah! For once I wanted to watch the video, but it just showed up as a big blank space on the page!

    • Latverian Diplomat

      It’s an Adobe Flash Player video, unfortunately.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Happened to me too. Refresh the page.

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Imma start continue by intersectioning with my trans brothers and sisters (and cisters) on Friday night in front of Trump Tower, Chicago.

    • Up In Smoke O’hontas

      Bundle up! It’s cold (up here anyway)

  • Paperless Tiger

    The mad dog didn’t bite anyone today so it must have got better. Hooray!

  • Jeffery Campbell

    It doesn’t really surprise me that a group of informed people respond more appropriately than some of our dumbass press.

  • SayItWithOtters
  • Lurkylu

    Poor Van Jones. i guess when Jared visited the CNN execs and said make the “not Obama Black Guy” talk nice about my Fuhrer-in-law — they put the heat on.

    its a gig…Van has college loans maybe. Pundits have to be singing the right song — look at Scottie Nell, my favorite snarling blonde propagandist. She gone. Where are you Scottie Nell ???????

    • Weevie

      That Van thing in WaPo was a parody. It had to be.
      Right?
      No?

  • Holly

    I will condemn and deny the Lying Orange Cheeto and his goon squad until the day they are all run outta Washington on a rail. He will NEVER be my president. This sham of a government will never be my government. I will be a Resistance Fighter until they are all exposed for the TREASONOUS TRAITORS they are. In the immortal words of Bill Paxton as the president in Independence Day ” We will not go quietly into the night. We will not vanish without a fight”. Fuck off Trump. The End.

    • also too dylan thomas.

      • Holly

        “Do not go gentle into that good night”

        • yes of course (a couple years ago i decided i was bored with all my shakespeare monologues and started doing random dylan thomas. it was only sporadically successful…).

          but! derivative!

    • Rotisserie Teal

      It’s actually ‘Bill Pullman’ in ID4 but I completely agree with your sentiment. Fight back against every fucking thing

      • Holly

        Damn me for a full on fool. You’re right. Sorry kids. I went off on a rant and lost it.

        • Rotisserie Teal

          No worries. Billy Pax is on a lot of minds since his passing.

          • Holly

            Truer words have never been spoken.

        • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

          Well, if you REALLY want to be accurate (and I think you were just trying to give a little send-of to poor Bill Paxton), it was Roland Emmerich and Dean Devlin who WROTE those words. Bill just said them. /end writer’s rant that no one cares about anyway, but still we pathetically keep on with it

          • Holly

            I initially misidentified Bill Paxton as the president in Independence Day. I was using the president in Independence Day, played by the excellent Mr. Pullman as an example of how a “real” president gives a speech. I give full credit to the writers. Keep on with the ranting. We seriously need our outlets right now.

          • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

            I know, I know, I was just being, you know, a writer. :)

        • Pisto75666

          No need to apologize. We love a good rant (especially for the right reasons), around these parts.

    • Mr. Food Genius

      You are nobody. Id say you will never be anybody but thats obvious as well as too late for your life to have ANY meaning or value. You are an ugly creature, that is why your life is the way it is. God didnt take your family, he saved them from the shame of being related to you. Their deaths were the best things to happen to the world because they shared your DNA.

  • TootsStansbury

    I heart this post. My liberal not nice heart grew three sizes.

  • ViveLaPersistence

    People who voted for Trump because they believed would create jobs makes me re-think my view that universal suffrage is a good thing.

    • Weevie

      He’s definitely handing out near universal suffering.

    • shaar dula

      the side effect is universal suffer-age. everybody is miserable. doomed either way – doomed by decree of a tinpot vs doomed by prejudice of fellow citizens. prefer later to former. don’t know why.

  • Weevie

    The problem with fighting using facts is your opponents have to be armed with counter facts. That’s called discussion, argument, something civil like that.

    But this is more typical.

    “So, do you think EPA has gone too far with some of their regulations?”
    “Hillary lost get over, leftists lost house and liberal senate, republican control
    most of governor position, etc. etc. etc.”

    “What about those Russian flags at CPAC? Funny, huh?”
    “Who ever told you shoot your ill inform mouth blew also!”

    Some of this comes from bots, some are real replies and many of those talking gibberish won’t benefit from all the education in the world. These people need to be led, not scared to death. The Hairman constantly insults the constituents who nudged him over the top same as he used those folks as props last night dragging them into his sick melodrama.

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      I’ve literally seen “You need to SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN. You will be TOLD what to do.” Like they’re so pathetic they’re literally saying “I am SO WEAK. I know nothing. I want a STRONG MAN to tell me what to do, then I GET TO BE STRONG TOO! Poopyhead!”

  • shaar dula

    fuck the browsers and the cookies that they rode on.
    i’m hunting for music videos and i keep getting ads from this channel
    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCH9ciCUcWavMsFcAJtLUSyw

    i dont want you stupid abs. fuck off.

  • Toledo Window Box

    Painful. The Trump droids are brainwashed and believe the lies that Trump has told them. It’s pointless to even try and talk to them.

    • Sid Pevear

      You got that right!

  • Zyxomma

    Fun? Did I play the wrong video? That was just depressing. And why does Frank Luntz get to be on TV?

    • Penny Dreadful Says Resist

      Yeah, I didn’t enjoy anything about this. I don’t think those people were real.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Because he’s the father of subliminal Republican messaging?

  • eyelashviper

    The Stupid is so deep with some of them that there is just no hope.
    Anyone who believes that tRump will make jobs is nuts…he has cheated his employees, stiffed contractors, and refuses to pay what he owes for the labor of others.

    • Pisto75666

      “But he said it! During a campaign! And he’s white and not Killary so why would he lie!?”

      Sometimes it is wrong to laugh at the stupidity of others. This is not one of those times.

      • mailman27

        And, what’s more… harrumph… E-mails!!!1!!!

      • Sid Pevear

        More like point your finger at them and laugh!

        • Pisto75666

          Just laughing at them is enough for me. Besides, I was taught it’s rude to point.

    • ryp

      Hey, he said he was going to create jobs, he didn’t promise that the people working them weren’t going to get fucked over.

      • eyelashviper

        Yep, jobs for all, just no paycheck.

  • phoenix00

    So looks like Frank Luntz got his ass handed to him, amirite?

  • HazooToo

    The video is down, for me. Anyone have an alternate?

    • Little Lulu Ω

      Real Clear Politics has it up.

      • HazooToo

        Thank you!

  • zerosumgame0005

    Frank Luntz claims he will save “civility”? LOL :sadzface:

    • Boscoe

      He’ll just find a way to redefine “asshole”. ‘Cause that’s what he does.

      • NotConvinced

        Frank should talk to Paul Ryan about that. Lyin’ P attempted to redefine rape. Of course it didn’t work but Lyin’ P never apologized for that. He’s a firm believer in Alternate Facts. It’s creative even if it’s ridiculously wrong. Republicans liked it and they are the ones who will cut Luntz the checks.

  • Begin Anew Day

    This focus group is missing something. What could it be?

    Vladimir Putin with no shirt on?

    Alex Jones with no shirt on?

    Rush Limbaugh in a thong onesie?

    If Frank Luntz wants me to waste one second on his half baked crapola he is going to have to come to grips with the brave new world of semi-nude overweight white guys running their mouths 24-7and nursing their fondly nurtured bigotries.

    What? You thought Wonkette was the only place where pants-free commenting is the norm?

  • Shibusa

    OK, so a friend of mine went to Frank Luntz’s house recently. He reported that Luntz has a full scale replica of the oval office in his house. I am not making that up.

    • azeyote

      in his house or up his ass – it’s just semantics –

    • JayGoldenBeach

      His basement has a room for getting whipped by a neocon dominatrix.

  • Penny Dreadful Says Resist

    I am not comfortable with this video. It feels extremely forced and unnatural. Somebody hold me.

  • Isn’t it wonderful that we no longer have Obama dividing us, anymore?

    (Also, fuck the guy saying, “The country has been so damaged that we don’t agree on anything, anymore!” Dog whistle for, “It’s the black guy’s fault”, much?)

    • JCfromNC

      I suppose it might be vaguely possible (I don’t remember any other comments he made) that he meant “damaged by GOTP shenanigans”.

      • I suppose. Maybe. But, I’m standing by my initial assessment. Until he makes additional comments.

        But, honestly, all of the supporters seemed … unhinged? Like the immigrant woman who declared that EVERY IMMIGRANT (but her) is looking for a free handout? What the actual fuck? And it doesn’t matter how many other kinds of people also get help with child care expenses? So, we should restrict all assistance for children to the white variety? Or something? WHAT?

        • JCfromNC

          There was definitely a strong contingent of wingnutty types there, so absent any further clarifying remarks from that one guy, his comment could pretty well fit into either camp — or even the “both sides do it” group.

          But yeah, the whole “every immigrant woman I know just comes here to pop out babbies and collect welfare” was something else.

          • Full disclosure: “Both sides do it” is something of a trigger for me. Along with, “BUT, HER EMAILS!”

            That having been said, however, to sit and just … disagree with EVERYTHING, including facts and then be all, “See!?! We’ve been so damaged, we can’t even agree on anything!” (including facts), means *cough*blackguy*cough* to me. Something had to do the damaging, after all. And it clearly wasn’t Trump.

          • Phoenixdoglover

            Hmmm.

            Fertility rates (births per women of childbearing age)

            Canada 1.6
            US 1.9
            El Salvador 1.9
            Mexico 2.2
            Nicaragua 2.3
            Honduras 2.4
            Guatemala 3.2

            Can’t see that translates into “popping out babies”, but we do need our stereotypes to get through the day.

          • JCfromNC

            Yes and the whole “have babies so you can kick back and live large on welfare” is a bullshit meme in and of itself.

    • Foocatchoo

      You mean Zee Geh-man guy (aka. Werner Klemperer aka. Colonel Klink)?!!!

  • The lady from Guatemala reminds me of many types who see everybody else as “getting handouts” but not them. It’s like they learned the first rule of GOP America, “I got mine, so STFU”.

  • I would look forward to hearing about the woman from Guatemala being discriminated against or somehow attacked by some (other) Trump voters who assume that she is here illegally based on her accent. Trumpsters have become increasingly emboldened by the poorly-obfuscated racism of their Manchild-in-Chief. If any of them had even half a brain, they would be ashamed of what their votes have brought about. Then again, if any of them had even half a brain, they wouldn’t have voted for that petulant idiot in the first place.

    • JayGoldenBeach

      She wisely started out saying how she wants to work and for bonus points she condemned people that supposedly come here for free stuff. Must not be her first time around Republicans. LoL

  • UnsaltedSinner

    But we clearly must respect Donald now that this speech has proven he has changed completely and is no longer the man he was for 70 years until Tuesday night.

    https://twitter.com/BenariLee/status/837016074486861825

    • Foocatchoo

      Zee Geh-man Guy tends to zink dat Zee Donald could be verked with if Zee Democrats would only try!

      • Gregory Brown

        That’s “vould only try!”

    • Pisto75666

      Amazing what a shave and barely getting banned from Hollywood can do for a person, isn’t it?

  • dshwa

    When Frank fucking Luntz is the media’s voice of sanity, you know we’re beyond fucked.

    • reelreeler

      yep, yep….spot-on.

    • Austin Bowles

      He’s the one that always does these impartial surveys of 100% Republican voters then asks, “How many think a Republican President would be better than a Democratic President?” THEN, he’s invited on the news shows to share his timely results.

  • JackLinks

    Doesn’t Luntz own a shirt that buttons at the collar?

  • Foocatchoo

    I’ve always said the Dems could use a guy like Tank Butz…

  • JayGoldenBeach

    Luntz’s group included some obvious authoritarian-submissives: They focus on ‘how’ Trump talks, not ‘what’ he says.

  • sonaliraq

    If those are regular people I’m scared.

    • Farrrrrrrrrrts

      welcome to the world, the majority are dumb

  • Farrrrrrrrrrts

    my throat is going raw from all the fact shouting

  • pragmatist3

    Wow! They really Are Spitfires!!!!
    The first 30 seconds of the video they were dressed in robot outfits and decapitating each other.
    After watching that speech I understand the feeling.

  • Lotus954

    Did anyone see Trevor Noah last night? In the campaign, he told his supporters he could appear “Presidential” and he gave an example. Noah ran that film right next to what he did when he came to the mike and the actions were identical. He said he’d preserve clean air and water on the same day he signed a bill allowing coal dust to be dumped into streams. Scam, Scam, Scam and the people are buying it AGAIN!!!!

  • Ducksworthy

    The woman from Guatemala reminds me that, yes there are many people from Latin America who fled to this great country when the dictatorships the banana republicans set up in their home countries collapsed.

    • BrendaKay

      But I found it interesting that she claimed all her immigrant friends came here to have babies and collect welfare. I am glad others shouted her down, as that is provably not the truth. I volunteer in the schools and the administrators will tell you that the immigrants (from all over the world, not just Latin America) are the ones working the hardest.

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