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Is Kellyanne Conway off to Lawyer Jail for Alternative Ethics? PROBABLY!!! Is she a total embarrassment to her alma mater? DEFINITELY!!! Is Poor Kells persecuted by all the mean elitists inside the DC bubble? Let’s Lawsplore!!

Thursday, fifteen law professors filed a disciplinary complaint with the DC Bar against the President’s Special Assistant Deputy for Television Prevarication. The professors, who specialize in legal ethics, allege that Conway is a LiarLiarPantsOnFire and an embarrassing zit on the legal profession. They urge the DC Bar to pop that sucker forthwith and with all due haste.

The professors point out that “It is professional misconduct for a lawyer to [e]ngage in conduct involving dishonesty, fraud, deceit, or misrepresentation,” and continually making shit up about the non-existent Bowling Green Massacre “calls into serious question … her fitness for the practice of law.'”

You see, lawyers employed by The Gubmint have an extra-special obligation to NOT BE LIARS:

Lawyers holding public office assume legal responsibilities beyond those of other citizens. A lawyer’s abuse of public office can suggest an inability to fulfill the professional role of lawyers.

The elitist law professors take issue with Conway’s repeated claims that Barack Obama was the Original Muslim Banner in Chief, but, “Most people don’t know that, because it didn’t get covered.” The sparse media coverage likely resulted from the fact that IT NEVER HAPPENED.

They further allege that going on Fox to yell at Nordstrom and hawk Ivanka’s tacky crap is is hella unethical, and “a clear violation of government ethics rules, about which a lawyer and member of the Bar should surely know.”

FUN FACT: The American Bar Association (ABA) mandated ethics courses in law schools after lawyers working in the Nixon White House brought shame upon the profession during the Watergate scandal. You’re next, Reince!

Conway’s membership in the DC bar is currently suspended because she failed to pay her bar dues, like a common lawyer who resides within the jurisdiction. The cost to maintain an inactive status membership is $163 annually. There is no word whether Ms. Conway instead devoted these funds to the Bowling Green Massacre Memorial Fund.

Speaking of people who hate Kellyanne Conway, Patricia McGuire, president of Conway’s alma mater Trinity College, dropped some serious shade on the ’89 grad in a February 12 blog post entitled On Lies and the Truths We Must Tell. McGuire wrote, “Ms. Conway has been part of a team that thinks nothing of shaping and spreading a skein of lies as a means to secure power.” The University President further drew Conway’s attention to the school’s honor code, which says, “We must not look away from lies, that we must confront them and tell the truth as a matter of justice for the community.” YOU ARE BAD, KELLYANNE, AND YOU SHOULD FEEL BAD!!!

Reached for comment, Conway complained that she had given $50,000 to the school in the past. “My money was good.”

HOW EVEN CAN THEY CRITICIZE HER? DID SHE NOT PAY THEM TO PRAISE HER FOREVER? This clearly violates the Ethical Rubber Stamp Clause in the Alternative Honor Code.

You tell, ’em, Kells! Take a principled stand. Give back that JD! Throw away that fancy pants Bachelorette Diploma! Go back to high school like a Real American, so you can sit at the mean girls table and shit talk all day long. It’s what you were doing anyway, right?

[Washington Post / Washington Post again]

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  • memzilla Ω

    Between this and the ACLU, if you’d’ve told me a year ago that I would be CHEERING LAWYERS, I’d’ve asked you to pass the pipe.

    • Ricky Gay

      and now the Trump Admin is gonna try to take the pipe away from us! IDJITS!

      • rocktonsam

        you’d think the Trumpets would want us stoned

        • Ricky Gay

          IKR?

      • Mike Steele

        That won’t sit well with our local flying monkeys, many of whom are youngs who indulge at will in anything contraband, then use their Obamacare for court-mandated rehab

    • FlownOver

      IAAL, and I’d still appreciate it if you’d pass the pipe this way.

    • SweetDeeKat

      Some of us actually take that “speak for someone who has no voice” thing seriously.

  • Truck Fump

    It’s the FemiNazis attacking her alternative integrity.

  • Sardonicuss

    It is so hard to fathom her pulling off a law degree in the first place?
    She can’t seem to hold two linear thought trains in her head at one time – much less truthful ones.

    • laughingnome

      She’s clever, but not quite clever enough.

    • Sakonyachen

      You can get a degree with a 1.0 GPA from many schools. Passing the bar exam sounds like a camel passing through the eye of a needle though.

    • Sandy Beaches

      Hmmm. It’s interesting that she doesn’t have a martindale hubbell page (and yes, I searched her maiden name, too)

      On edit: never mind. It doesn’t appear she ever worked in a law firm

  • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

    Sillyanne, like Milo, will come out of this more toxic than a urinal cake in Chernobyl (I have to credit the Veep writing team for that one,) and that will be a good thing.

    • Persistent Demme

      Milo will just change his hair, his name, be the straight RWNJ he’s always been, and blend right in with the CPAC crowd.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        The problem being, Milo doesn’t want to blend in. He wants to stand out.

  • CogitoErgoBibo

    Went to see Lewis Black live last night. He was awesome, of course. My favorite zinger for the night: “Kellyanne (Alternative Facts) Conway is who you hire to get rid of your daughter’s cheerleading rival.”

    • schmannity

      The Tonya Harding of politics!

      • Wild Cat

        Ol’ Flapjacks!

      • Serai 1

        I dunno. I haven’t seen her kneecap anybody yet. She’s too fucking clumsy.

  • Clyde Barrow

    Kellyanne is low hanging fruit. Go after the real crooks….Trump, Bannon, Priebus, Sessions, Pence, Cotton, Ryan, the smegma that actually makes policy and is colluding with the Russians.

    • Ricky Gay

      or plea bargain her into a reliable snitch.

      • MeerkatsRMammals

        This. She will spill ALL of the beans…

        • Ricky Gay

          & the relief would do wonders for her skin. Better than Oil of Olay!

      • arglebargle

        Like any court of law would believe a word coming out of that mouth.

    • (Major_Major_Major)ly_Pissed

      Attacking the foundation is a sound strategy for toppling the tower. It is what Grand Vizier Bannon is doing to our government as I type this.

    • Sardonicuss

      Think her and Preenus are pre-manufactured for the slaughter.

    • shivaskeeper

      One at a time. Work up the chain. It takes longer but is going to be more effective in the long run. She’ll turn on them to save herself.

    • Serai 1

      Yeah, I’m getting pretty irritated by all the coverage about Trump. The fucking CONGRESS is the problem – they’re the ones destroying the country. But hey, I guess we’re all happy to keep staring at the crazy clown while the actual thieves take everything we have.

      • Clyde Barrow

        Exactly, thank you! Congress has the power to effectively neuter Trump, but instead insist on carrying out his agenda. I have nothing but absolute disrespect for the Cons that denounced Trump during the campaign, only to align themselves with him after the election.

        Only cowards put ideology over country.

        • Serai 1

          It’s not his agenda, it’s theirs. They’ve been waiting for this opportunity for decades. That’s why it’s so fucking irritating – what they’re doing backstage is the whole point, not any nonsense of Trump’s. The more outrageous and stupid he is, the better they like it, because no one’s watching the watchmen. It’s fucking maddening how the media just jumps like a fucking dog to their tune, no matter how big or how small. It’s all about the noise, and he makes the most noise.

      • Persistent Demme

        I think that’s the plan, (and we know it).

    • arglebargle

      Remember the Comey!

      • calliecallie

        And Chaffetz!

        • arglebargle

          Oh yeah. That fucker deserves a tenth circle of hell.

  • Ducksworthy

    Post Watergate ethics training is fine but now, I think we need to look into what changes Germany made in their legal training after Nuremberg (the trial, not the rally).

  • Nounverb911

    “The DC Bars have a problem with women in power”.
    –KAC

    • Jeffocaster in the desert

      She thinks the DC Bar serves expensive drinks……….

      • PubOption

        The Trump Hotel bar in DC certainly does.

    • Serai 1

      Which bars would those be? Because if there’s a bouncer in black leather chaps, she may be right.

    • Mike Steele

      Not if their credit’s still good…

  • Serai 1

    And that’s the basis of all their dealings – “Money should get me whatever I want.”

  • Nounverb911
  • CogitoErgoBibo

    In other news: CPAC optics are going well.
    https://twitter.com/PeterHamby/status/835150821411143682

    • MeerkatsRMammals

      Who is responsible for this? Why did they think this was a good idea? Holy crap.

      • CogitoErgoBibo

        Maybe “Burn it all down/we’re here to deconstruct” Bannon has just given up any semblance of subtlety at this point.

        • Sandy Beaches

          Subtlety for him is when he said, “make the trains run…” and then caught himself and didn’t say, “on time.”

    • Nounverb911

      Were the flags at least made in Russia?

      • MeerkatsRMammals

        Probably Mexico or China…

        • Oblios_Cap

          Were they made by a Trump business?

        • CogitoErgoBibo

          I can’t see the word “China” in relation to Trumpy without hearing Alec Baldwin sayin, “Giiiina.”

    • Serai 1
    • Thiazin Red

      I’m hoping that this was someone carrying out Olympics caliber trolling.

      • TakingAmes
        • CogitoErgoBibo

          OMG that is so effing amazing. I want to buy that guy lunch with a million martinis.

          • MizzMazz

            Me too. Remember, these are the people who put Betsy DeVos in charge of education. Their stupid smiling faces are priceless.

          • LucindathePook

            We would swim in a pool of martinis.

        • MeerkatsRMammals

          That’s beautiful :)

        • ZangoCrudmonger

          “Staffers quickly come around to confiscate them.” And, this, the theft of private property, is how you get communism.

    • Arse Grammatica

      I want I want I want.

    • boyblue122

      “Organizers quickly scooped up the flags. When Mediaite went back to try and find the man handing them out, he was gone.”

      Like a thief in the night

    • Mike Steele

      Vive la resistance!!!

  • MeerkatsRMammals

    Goodbye Kellyanne :) Hope the door doesn’t hit ya on the way out…

    • Serai 1

      Oh, this doesn’t mean anything. She’ll still be there, at least until Twitler gets sick of her. This just means she can’t do lawyer stuff, which she hasn’t done in a while anyway. It might make a little trouble for her when she looks for another job, though. Which, as I said, should be soon.

      • MeerkatsRMammals

        I don’t know…they seem pretty upset with her. If Ivanka gave her the scolding that was rumored, you know KAC’s on Trump’s list of possible enemies right now.

        • Serai 1

          Some members of the Bar are upset with her. She still hasn’t been sanctioned. And whether Trump likes her or not has nothing to do with whether she’ll get sanctioned. This is about Ethics In Lawyerism, you know.

  • memzilla Ω

    I’ll tell you what I Have A Dream About. I have a dream that Dolt 45’s matryoshka doll of Russian connections is so exposed that it thoroughly taints and ruins his brand, Ivanka’s brand, and the reputation of anyone who worked for and enabled him. Can you imagine the Drumpf brand being worth not just ZERO, but a negative number? What that would do to his alleged “net worth?” And the reputation I wish to be most totally wrecked is Kellyanne’s, to the point that she won’t even be able to pass a background check to be a dog walker.

    • BadKitty904
    • Persistent Demme

      THIS!
      As stem-cell activist once said to me: “This isn’t about compromises and concessions, it’s about ending careers!”
      My kind of activist.

    • Sandy Beaches

      and have him walk away muttering: And that’s the only thing I need is *this*. I don’t need this or this. Just this ashtray… And this paddle game. – The ashtray and the paddle game and that’s all I need… And this remote control. – The ashtray, the paddle game, and the remote control, and that’s all I need… And these matches. – The ashtray, and these matches, and the remote control, and the paddle ball… And this lamp. – The ashtray, this paddle game, and the remote control, and the lamp, and that’s all *I* need. And that’s *all* I need too. I don’t need one other thing, not one… I need this. – The paddle game and the chair, and the remote control, and the matches for sure. Well what are you looking at? What do you think I’m some kind of a jerk or something! – And this. That’s all I need.

  • HolidayinCambodia

    I would have advised against doing this, but nobody asked me. All it will do it help rile up the Naked Emperor’s opponents against the global intellectual elites. If they had done nothing, no one would have cared one way or the other; I mean, she’s already suspended, and she isn’t practicing law.

    Sorry for a rational post, but now that I’ve doxxed myself, I have to behave better on Wonkette.

    • Serai 1

      Sometimes people do things because they’re the right thing to do, and not because they want a particular outcome for themselves. She needed to be slapped down by an authoritative body, and with luck, she will be.

      • Wild Cat

        She thinks she’s a dirty, nasty little girl and she likes being slapped down—hard!—by authoratative bodies—hard! hard! harder!—she’s been such a dirty little non authoratative whore for daddy . . . take that, bitch!—give it to me, strong fascist daddy!—nasty nasty slapdown by authority…ouch!

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Doxxed yourself???

      • HolidayinCambodia

        My wife is an occasional contributor to Wonkette, and I openly inhabit her comment threads.

        • WomanInThePersistence

          That’s very sweet. You know, it’s not difficult to set up your own account. Should you so choose.

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    OT moar Trumpgrets… the sad part is- about 80% voted for him and many of them still support him

    https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/feb/24/union-strike-momentive-stephen-schwarzman-blackstone

    • msanthropesmr

      I have zero fucks to give for these assholes. Zero.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        I can spare a tiny bit of empathy for the ones who figured it out and admit their mistake- but the ones who still cling to their “both sides do it, so I still support Donnie” BS? Fuck ’em. Let them suffer. They caused millions of others to suffer with their ignorant, shortsighted vote- they’ll get nothing and like it.

        • msanthropesmr

          I can’t with this group, and here’s why. Most of these guys are union. And anything they haven’t had to give up is a result of that union. And yet they voted for the GOP, which if they could, would make NY a right to work state. The only thing that has stopped these guys from working at all is the liberal voters in the other parts of the state.

          • Zippy W Pinhead

            there is something despicable about union members cutting their own throats, along with everyone else’s, by voting GOP

  • (Major_Major_Major)ly_Pissed

    Poor dear, sweet Kellyanne. What has she ever done to get such a vitriolic reaction. She has balanced a rewarding and busy work-life with raising a family, and yet still manages to look immaculately put together each and every morning. You little ladies could learn a thing or two.

    Jesus christ that was hard to write, how the heel do the Stormtrumpers think shit like this all the time? ALL.THE.FUCKING.TIME. I feel like I need a Silkwood shower

  • TheGrandWazoo2

    Ethics in this administration are unethical.

  • GemlikeFlame

    She sure flamed out early, didn’t even make it through her kid’s first school year. Under the circumstances, a job in the private sector seems tenuous. I wonder what her exit strategy is? As it is, she’s about to get dumped in the middle of a hostile DC establishment, and the mister can kiss any prospect of a cushy administration job goodbye.

    • TakingAmes

      Her husband is up for Solicitor General. The nepotism is strong in this one.

    • Sardonicuss

      She will just disappear for a while and reappear on the wingnut welfare circuit.
      The Gingrich plan.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        like cockroaches, they always find a way to survive

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      “Spending more time with her family” duh

      • LucindathePook

        She’s a MOM!

        • Querolous

          MotherOfMAGA

  • ImPEECH!

    Never gonna believe another word outta you Kellyanne, Kellyanne, Quite Contrarian. Not if you pinky swear it and say “it’s bulletproof.” Not even if you “on my mother’s grave” it. If you said it’s raining I’ll look for pee on my leg. If the wallpaper “tastes like schnozberries” it’ll probably actually taste like wallpaper paste! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3pwvB4_Te8A

  • Sakonyachen

    Openly admitting that you expect discretion from an institution when you give them money is not an argument for your high ethical standards.

    • Little Lulu Ω

      Kellyanne’s claim that she gave them $50,000 is about as credible as the tens of millions of dollars Trump donated to charity. Some journalist should check into this; if it’s yet another lie told by her, Kellyanne’s credibility will be shit.

      • Sakonyachen

        It’s already shit. The Trumpistanis will never believe anything unless Trump says it. All the proof in the world won’t help that.

  • As a study aid here’s some ‘FUNNY LAWYER JOKES’ presented to you by Reader’s Digest:

    http://www.rd.com/jokes/lawyer/

  • Nounverb911
  • Crystalclear12

    I REALLY miss the Obamas today.

    • calliecallie

      Every day. Every. Damn. Day.

  • schmannity

    In fairness, if lying as a government lawyer resulted in disbarment, paralegals would be running the government.

  • AnnieGetYerFun

    Honestly, KAC is an idiot and a liar and has probably broke many laws. But I’ll be bummed if she is the only member of the Trump administration to suffer any legal woes.

  • Michael R
    • Nounverb911

      Needs more swastika tattoos.

      • Michael R

        The other two just need a kooky red hat .

    • laughingnome

      Manson girls libelz!!

    • Clyde Barrow

      Squeaky Fromme is out of prison now. She’s old, but still probably crazy enough to chase the president through the park with a .45.

      • Serai 1

        Can’t wait for the footage. Yakkity Saks would make a good soundtrack, I’m thinking.

      • guppy06

        Squeaky Fromme was the Gerald Ford of presidential assassins.

        • arglebargle

          Missed it by that much, chief.

        • Clyde Barrow

          The irony, it burns!

    • Villago Delenda Est

      You know you’re an old when you get the context of the photo.

  • wide_stance_hubby

    I bet she’s REALLY touchy about glue factory jokes today.

  • rocktonsam

    her fitness isn’t practicing law its breaking it. that’s how she got the job.
    we’re going to need bigger jails before this shit is over.

  • Nounverb911

    “Quoting me is lying about me.”
    –Tattooed across the forehead of all trump staffers

  • Michael R

    Are these the kids who never went through the ” rebel against your parents ” phase ?

  • Oblios_Cap

    I was hoping that KaC had left the planet to go live on one of the Trappist-1 planets. No such luck, I reckon.

    • Thiazin Red

      All I can think of when I hear that name is a colony of space monks brewing space beer.

      • Historicat

        I’m seeing the sitcom as a cross between Cheers and Red Dwarf.

    • BrianW

      Hmmpf. Why should SHE get to go there early and screw it up for everyone else?

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Good start. Now, how about Virginia Tech go after Steve Bannon for providing white supremacists with a platform?

    • Mike Steele

      And enabling ammosexuals

    • guppy06

      White supremacy? In Virginia? Surely you jest!

  • schmannity

    Hush money dollars aren’t worth what they used to be.

  • Bill Fair

    Just brazenly funny.. True, but funny as hell!

  • Nounverb911
  • Michael R

    Sadly , Kellyanne was actually a slight improvement over Katrina Pierson

    https://s12.postimg.org/c4pi43rzh/hypnotoad_victim_katrina_pierson_small.jpg

    • msanthropesmr

      All hail hypnotoad.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        More subsidies for the brain slug planet!

      • Doug Langley

        Yes . . . master . . .

  • Nounverb911

    So this is good news for Stephen Miller?

  • laughingnome

    I gave them 50k so they should ditch all their principles and ethics.

  • Jamoche

    http://www.theatlantic.stfi.re/politics/archive/2017/02/rumana-ahmed-trump/517521/?sf=jegplzv#aa
    “I Was a Muslim in Trump’s White House

    When President Obama left, I stayed on at the National Security Council in order to serve my country. I lasted eight days.”

    • That was gut-wrenching to read.

      • Nockular cavity

        Actually, by that time, the gut-wrenching will be from the radiation poisoning.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      I totally understand why she left, but I would really like to read a longer, more inside-baseball piece by someone sane who sticks it out longer in the Trump administration. I’m sure those will be coming.

  • BadKitty904

    OT – In re: something Eyelashviper posted earlier…

    Donald Trump’s Father-in-law Is a Communist Who Looks Exactly Like Him
    http://metro.co.uk/2015/10/30/donald-trumps-father-in-law-is-a-communist-who-looks-exactly-like-him-5470817/

      • shaar dula

        filed under shit you cannot make up.

      • Lefty Frizzell

        That’s as freaky as Lilly Potter/Ginny Weasely

      • ariel_gee_398

        Look at the short end of his FIL’s tie. That shit is uncanny.

      • BadKitty904

        Apparently, her Dad also has links to Putin?

        • Oblios_Cap

          And both have too high a daily caloric intake.

        • Red Bird Ω

          Details????

          • BadKitty904

            That’s what I’m trying to track down right now (as work and lunch allow)…

          • BadKitty904

            So far, just vague rumors, which also link Knavs to the Russian Mafia. Haven’t seen any “smoking guns”…

      • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

        They truly all look alike, don’t they?

      • Jenny

        Ewwww

      • Nyumbu

        I believe Papa Knavs is 5 years younger than The Donald.

      • calliecallie

        To be fair, he also looks a bit like William Shatner.

    • guppy06

      Donald prefers younger women with daddy issues.

      • BadKitty904

        Perhaps they’re more easily victimized.

      • OrG

        Who doesn’t?

    • janecita

      They both wear their ties as cock warmers.

  • ManchuCandidate

    http://static.celebuzz.com/uploads/2017/01/kellyanne-conway-012617-1485467392.jpg
    “Petty In Red/White/Blue: The Tracy Flick story.”

    • I’m so sorry that the whole Simplicity pattern thing was fake.

    • Shanzgood

      I don’t normally notice this kind of thing but her reds didn’t match each other.

      • hendenburg2

        I’m partially red/green colorblind and even I can see that!

        (after you pointed it out)

        • Shanzgood

          It’s stupid how much it’s bugged me. But I feel a bit better letting my Bitch out.

          • Martini Ambassador

            No, that’s not bitchy, that’s attention to detail.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Cuff and collar don’t match?

        • Shanzgood

          The gloves.

          • Historicat

            That’s just bloodstains – they certainly used to match!

  • guppy06

    HOW EVEN CAN THEY CRITICIZE HER? DID SHE NOT PAY THEM TO PRAISE HER FOREVER? This clearly violates the Ethical Rubber Stamp Clause in the Alternative Honor Code.

    On the other hand, the school’s phone bank will still call her at least once a month to hit her up for more money, forever and ever, amen.

  • Jenny

    Wait wtf she has a law degree?!

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Oh, she’s bright enough. Just evil.

      • But I can’t get my mind around how her “I know you are but what am I?” arguments got her a law degree.

        • Sandy Beaches

          Some of the dumbest people I know are lawyers.

        • UncleTravelingMatt

          Anyone bright enough to get in to law school will get their degree. They may know zip about the law — but as long as they can pay the tuition, they’ll get their JD.

    • MynameisBlarney

      So did Orly Taintz.

  • Nounverb911
    • arglebargle

      Perfect. I’d never see her again if that’s her career path.

    • msanthropesmr

      That’s an insult to McDonald’s workers. They never lies to me about my order.

    • wide_stance_hubby

      Who the fuck-hell would eat something that slag touched?

    • therblig

      she’ll put the Evil back in Grimace

  • Nounverb911
    • ariel_gee_398

      Margaret Thatcher Libel!!

  • Villago Delenda Est

    OK, I haven’t looked at the whole thread, and no doubt someone has already done this, but…

    LOCK HER UP!
    LOCK HER UP!

    • suziq

      Can’t be said often enough!

    • shaar dula

      the military guy, the bridge guy, the pus-y blog guy and the wig guy.
      lock him, him, him and him up, before you lock any her up.

  • Creepoman

    “. . . the ’89 grad . . .”

    Shit, that means I’m older than Cryptkeeper Barbie? I really need to find a mirror, but I’m afraid to look.

    • Oblios_Cap

      I imagine you look a lot “newer” than she does.

    • MizzMazz

      I got 4 years on her, and I can’t believe it. Being super thin as an old is ageing to the skin and hair, and also being a nasty excuse for a decent human being is ageing.

      • Shanzgood

        That reminds me – I need to eat lunch!

        • snark-lurker

          Are you wearing pants again?

          • Shanzgood

            Not today.

          • WomanInThePersistence

            Show off.

        • MizzMazz

          Hey, I think you were the person who suggested I try Fred Solls incense. If you were, thanks, it’s great, if you’re not, sorry I bothered you, but this is some bitchin’ incense. Have a wonderful lunch.

          • Shanzgood

            Nope, not me. I like plain old Satya Sai Baba Nag Champa flavor.

          • MizzMazz

            That stuff is good too. Try the Fred Soll’s stuff; it’s wonderful. I like putting the sticks out in a vase and just letting the essential oils do their thing. Light them as a last resort ;)

          • Shanzgood

            I usually stick to what I know won’t give me a headache. I’m like a canary in a coal mine when it comes to scented things.

          • Zyxomma

            So am I. I shy away from anything containing “fragrance” since that can mean thousands of toxic ingredients. I do love my essential oils (not the kind from MLM), and use them well.

      • Claire

        Truth. If I tried to weigh the same now that I weighed when I was 16, I’d look like a giant sandstorm had just revealed my tomb.

    • Nockular cavity

      I believe the syndrome is known as “Sith Corruption.”

      • therblig

        Sithylis?

  • Anna Rompage

    Wow, who knew there was a red line in regards to ethics among lawyers…

    • snark-lurker

      It’s not her lack of professional ethics—SHE GOT CAUGHT! that’s all.

  • Nounverb911
  • Mary Sandoras

    And yet, somehow Larry Klayman lives on.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Dick “Dark Lord of the Sith” Cheney as well.

  • Oblios_Cap
    • Mary Sandoras

      The rest of the story? I’m in suspense here.

      • Oblios_Cap

        Bwhahahah. My evil plan worked.

        • Villago Delenda Est

          “How do you keep an asshole in suspense?”

    • Nounverb911

      Needs more ‘bread bags’.

    • janecita

      Why follow the road? Just go through the blizzard, smoke a joint with the angry pagans, and voilà, you are at school!

      • Oblios_Cap

        Where’s the fun in that. Besides, you would miss out on walking across the broken glass with no shoes.

      • Historicat

        Um, hello? Dragons!

        • janecita

          I know, that’s the only downside to my plan:-(

    • arglebargle

      Which way is uphill?

      • Oblios_Cap

        Both ways.

      • TJ Barke

        Aoi,k.

    • mardam422

      Shouldn’t there be another line in the key indicating that it is uphill both ways?

    • Oblios_Cap

      Stolen shamelessly from:https://wronghands1.com/

      • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

        Well I actually did walk to school in the snow, which no longer exists.

    • Doug Langley

      Yeah, but you try telling that to kids nowadays and they’d never believe you.

    • ImGoingBacon

      You’ve gotta watch out for those deadly Elm trees. The rest seems like a cake walk.

  • Nounverb911

    OT
    So trump doesn’t believe in global warming?

    https://twitter.com/Fahrenthold/status/835164856491835397

  • Nounverb911
    • snark-lurker

      That is NOT fake news.

  • Michael R
  • azeyote

    she’ll just say they can’t handle strong women, call them sexists and her crowd will cheer –

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    OT: Bah! Job interview rescheduled for Monday.

    : (

    • ltmcdies

      oh that sucks….

    • janecita

      Why?

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        something came up – which i worried about, but my working friend says stuff comes up.

        The HR lady said she wants me to meet monday with the paralegal I’d be working with, so I’m not inclined to feel too nervous about it.

        I just like to complain, I guess.
        ; p

        • janecita

          On the bright side, you have the weekend to practice your interview answers;-)

          • Shanzgood

            And find pants.

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            lol – not only did I find them, I had them laundered and presssed. They were ready to go!

          • snark-lurker

            Wow you are depressing me now.

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            wait till you hear about the ties.
            I hate those damn things.

          • Occupied Territory of Kavefish

            Remember the Green Room rule: don’t put on your pants until you’re about to go on stage.

            Good luck on Monday!

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            thanks!
            I’m actually going to keep my shirt in the laundry bag till I get there as I is a smoker.

          • snark-lurker

            And get yourself all worked up over nuttin.

        • Historicat

          “You’re scheduled to interview this person.”
          “Wait – on a Friday? No, please, anything than that.”
          “OK, we’ll reschedule.”

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            and on a friday afternoon, no less!
            Harrumph.

    • Sophia

      Ah man!

    • WomanInThePersistence

      But you’ve still got one, right? I shall reschedule my incense waving. You’re still
      Going to do very well.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        lol, yeah, on Monday! I was telling janecita just below.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        and thnaks friend! ; )

        • WomanInThePersistence

          Always.

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            Dude, I forgot to tell you. It’s kinda hilarious cause both days she’s emailed me, Wed and today, I *just* happened to be sitting in front of computer. So I responded to her within 2 minutes.
            Each time she’s thanked me for the quick reply.
            I do occasionally get lucky (not that kind of getting lucky though).

          • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

            Sounds like they are serious. May Cthulhu assist you.

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            thank you!

          • Thaumaturgist

            Dude. All you do is Wonkette all day. Of course you were sitting in from of a computer. Do you ever sleep?

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            yess, I sleep a lot.
            And it’s not ALL i do. It’s mostly what I do, I just have it open on my computer in the background.
            Lol.

  • Mr. Blobfish

    What ever happened to trump’s private security service? He could take so fashion hints from Nixon. http://www.invisiblethemepark.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/white-house-secret-service-uniforms-nixon.jpg

  • Jennaratrix

    If Kellyanne Conartist did, in fact, give money to her alma mater, I think it would be a lovely gesture for the school to dig up the documentation of that, and send the money back.

    • natoslug

      Or, dig it up and then let her know how they spent it on students who didn’t turn out to be amoral pusbags.

      • Martini Ambassador

        I like this idea better. A charitable donation does not equal a bribe against the school calling out your bullshit.

      • Jennaratrix

        Or that.

  • therblig

    don’t they have to extradite her from fashion jail first?

  • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

    Did not know Smelly was a lawyer. Disbarring her will be precious, though we’ll have to listen to her whining about the persecution.

    • CogitoErgoBibo

      It’s a little dickish to disbar her from inactive status, so kudos to them for that.

      • JustDon’tSayDieInJail

        I’m OK with a dickish move in this case. Maybe more than OK.

  • CogitoErgoBibo

    I’m very suspicious of her DC bar membership. Not that it’s at all unethical (tons of people do it), but I’d bet she didn’t actually pass the bar in DC. DC has a notoriously difficult bar exam. Most people pass a state exam with reciprocity in DC and then “waive” in, citing the fact that they passed some other state’s exam. I’ve seen that she also has MD and NJ bar membership, so that likely explains the DC bar membership. And also why she’s late on her fees for inactive status. She basically just got her membership and has never really needed to use it.

    Another fun fact: You don’t have to go to continuing legal education classes if you’re inactive. Likely the last time she had an ethics course was in the early 90s right after she passed her first bar (presuming she went inactive in all states). I don’t see anywhere in her career history where an active law license would necessarily be required.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      I’m not sure a couple CLE units would have been enough to set her straight. She seems to have missed the entire point of her Professional Responsibility class.

      • CogitoErgoBibo

        Definitely. But she’s saving crazy cabbage. I’m inactive in 3 states (an ugly year and a half of moving had me pass NC, FL and VA bars during that short time). FL is almost $300 a year for inactive status, but I don’t have to pay for/get time off work to attend CLEs. Or pay to have credits I take in VA applied to my NC or FL license. So inactive makes a ton of sense financially. In most states, all that would be required to become active again would be to take a year of CLE requirements up front, prove I’m not a murderer and be granted active status by the bar. So it’s worth it to at least keep inactive status, just in case. Cheaper if you don’t need to be active and practice.

        • Sandy Beaches

          She went from clerking for a judge to working for a private company. As I said somewhere down thread, she has never worked for a law firm and doesn’t have a martindale hubbell listing. So, you might be right. She may not have ever passed the bar.

          • CogitoErgoBibo

            If she’s paying inactive status, she initially passed at least one bar. You have to be active before going inactive. But she could have applied for licenses in the other states, citing her then-active license in one state having reciprocity with the others. So it’s conceivable she passed only one, many years ago, and promptly went inactive.

          • Sandy Beaches

            Found it – she was admitted to the DC Bar in 1995. Conway is a member of the D.C. Bar under her maiden name, Kellyanne Fitzpatrick, although records show that her membership has been suspended for non-payment of dues (she remains an active member of the New Jersey Bar).

            http://lawnewz.com/high-profile/bar-complaint-filed-against-kellyanne-conway-for-alleged-false-statements-to-media/

            Side note: it figures she took the Jersey bar. It’s one of the easier ones to pass. People in my area traditionally take Jersey first, then PA and then take Delaware because it’s pretty hard to pass and is only offered once a year.

          • CogitoErgoBibo

            I knew a ton of people who took PA because it was easier and then waived into DC. Didn’t know where NJ fell on the easy-to-hard scale. Good to know.

        • UncleTravelingMatt

          I used to go inactive in WA when I had a PD contract in ID, but I stopped doing that. I invariably forgot to apply to have my Idaho CLEs approved for credit in WA, so I’d end up having to take extras to reactivate. WA dues are cheap — $415, and inactive dues are $200 — so the CLEs cost more than just maintaining my active status.

          • CogitoErgoBibo

            Yuck. I feel your pain. It’s all in how you juggle it.

    • Reddishrabbit

      Having done some CLE’s of (cough) questionable quality but cheap (cough) I’m not sure ethics would have helped. Now excuse me while I take this Brewery Law CLE.

  • DerrickWildcat

    It’s like the MMA banning a guy for being too violent.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

    OT: Paul Krugman digs up this oldie but goodie from the height of internet bubble (1999) due to news of a new Trump appointment:

    https://twitter.com/paulkrugman/status/835184029515280384

  • Martini Ambassador

    Orange is the new black, Kellyann. I’m sure you’ll wear it as stunningly as that hot mess of a Barbie outfit you sported at the inauguration.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨
    • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

      Trump cultist: “We love him because he speaks our language!”

      That’s the problem!

      • Left-wing Fascist Ron

        Yeah, who needs a president who speaks fluent English at university level? A hundred words is enough for anybody!

        • phoenix00

          > 140 characters is enough for anybody!

          FTFY

  • shaar dula

    isn’t this like killing a sicario, while the patron is still around?

  • WiscoJoe

    Since Reince’s rancid name was brought up in the context of legal ethics, here’s a fun story that has mostly gone in the memory hole (or maybe it’s too local small ball insidery baseball and other various mixed metaphors):

    1. Republicans get majorities in the Wisconsin legislature in 2010

    2. For the first time, the legislature “outsources” the task of coming up with redistricting maps to a private law firm, the law firm that just so happens to employ Reince Priebus, who is then also head of the Wisconsin GOP

    3. The redistricting maps are ludicrously, obviously gerrymandered as fuck. People sue. The judge says, “Hey, this looks pretty ridiculous. You all better show your work and explain exactly how you came up with these maps.”

    4. Republicans counter by saying that since the maps were drawn up by a private law firm, that FOIA do not apply, because the legislators themselves didn’t have anything to do with it. Furthermore, Attorney/Client privilege means that any discussions/documents that went into the redistricting maps are completely confidential, because a law firm was involved (again, Reince’s law firm).

    5. The judge is like, “Hey, that’s even more ridiculous. You definitely have to comply with FOIA requests, and there is no Attorney/Client privilege just because legislators outsourced their jobs to a Reince’s law firm. You all need to release all those documents now.”

    6. After more delays and legal wrangling, Reince’s law firm announces that they can’t actually release any of the documents in question because, oops, some low-level intern accidentally deleted everything in the months since the judge ordered everything to be released. The Republican legislators are like, “We have nothing to do with this, because we paid Reince’s law firm to take care of all of this for us, so we didn’t do anything wrong.”

    7. The redistricting battle continues to work its way through courts, but now the smoking gun evidence has been destroyed. Republicans benefit in the 2012, 2014, and 2016 elections. Reince gets promoted to RNC Chair and then Chief-of-Staff. In 2017, the courts finally decide that the redistricting is indeed ridiculous and shady as fuck, and demand changes. Republicans are like, “Sure, we’ll get right on that.”

    8. We’re all going to die.

    • OrG

      Crime doesn’t pay. Wait….What?..Never mind.

      • Thaumaturgist

        Crime doesn’t pay unless its organized.

        FIFY

        • stubbornirishlass

          Also committed by wealthy white Republicans.

          FIFY reboot.

    • TJ Barke

      Fucking scum.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Once again, the Commenting Rules for Radicals are stressed.

    • LucindathePook

      Point 6: Was intern named Rosemary Something???

      • Naytch

        Looks like somebody had a case of the Mondays.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Files on probably two dozen computers all got deleted by accident by that one intern.
      Judge: “Hey, this is more ridiculous still. Imma gonna find you all in contempt.”
      [Extremely well-funded “grass-roots” campaign to recall the judge arises mysteriously.]

  • Reximus
    • Michael R

      Aside from comic value , this is a lot like a politician asking you to pray for rain .

      • Spurning Beer

        It may be worth more than that. It wouldn’t surprise me if a lot of these atavistic douchebags put some stock in witchcraft, wizardry, spells, magic, and so forth. I mean, it’s in the fucking Bible. So they could well be spooked by it, is what I’m saying.

        • Michael R

          Yes , the pissing of of them is equal to their pissing off of us with their phony ” religious freedom ” nonsense .

        • Claire

          Look at how many of them threw a fit about the Harry Potter books because Satan.

      • snark-lurker

        Nu uh!

    • snark-lurker

      THIS JUST MIGHT WORK!!11!!!

    • Logic of Color

      I don’t think magic is going to…aww what the hell

      • Left-wing Fascist Ron

        I say let ’em try. What could it hurt?

    • Spurning Beer

      Expecto emolumenta!

    • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist
    • timpundit
    • Doug Langley

      Elizabeth Montgomery libelz!!!!

    • Zyxomma

      Saw this at faceplace (not this, but related). Suggestions for the binding spell include wrapping a cheeto in spiderweb and taping it to a mirror.

  • shaar dula

    alright 71 F. warmest EVER recorded here. ~36 inches of snow (in parts of areas around home) all melted like butter on a hot pan over last few days. so ya, even a gohmert couldn’t bring a ball of snow from here to DC. whatever.

    • Sandy Beaches

      IKR? People are all, “ooooh, enjoy the weather” and “isn’t this great?” NO! It is not great! It is scary as shit. TYVM.

      • Jamoche

        I’m surprised that Donnie hasn’t used the California floods as “proof” there wasn’t a drought here. Possibly he hasn’t noticed, even though he did have to approve FEMA.

        • Alexander Stallwitz

          Considering he has a habit of signing things without reading. I think Samantha Bee was right, he is illierate. It explains a lot

    • C4TWOMAN

      It’s like opposite season on the west coast. It should be warming up,but the last week they’ve been threatening snow. Not that’s it’s going to stick, but still…

    • veska

      It’s 75* in Northern Ohio. On February 24th. But no, global warming is a hoax.

  • bookish

    Fact-checking Trump CPAC speech.

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/fact-checker/wp/2017/02/24/fact-checking-president-trumps-cpac-speech/?utm_term=.26bac952bb25

    President Trump’s speech to the Conservative Political Action Conference at National Harbor in Maryland was littered with some of the president’s favorite and frequently-cited falsehoods. Here’s a roundup of the 12 of his more dubious claims, listed in the order in which he made them:

    • Left-wing Fascist Ron

      So many lies they just reported the TOP TWELVE. Let that sink in.

  • Pierre_de_Fermat

    Really. After the Bowling Green Massacre, everything has been different. I don’t even know if I wanna get out of bed in the morning.

    • Meccalopolis

      Bowling green stands with Sweden!

      • Pierre_de_Fermat

        And, I’m sure, Atlanta/Orlando (whichever, Spicer was confused, but only coastal elites would think there is a difference. I think.)

  • bookish
  • Alexander Stallwitz

    I wonder if Ethics Jail is next to Space Jail.

  • C4TWOMAN

    Reached for comment, Conway complained that she had given $50,000 to the school in the past. “My money was good.”

    I can’t even…

    • Mirful
    • Bebecca

      EVERYTHING is about money to republicans isn’t it?

      • C4TWOMAN

        I don’t understand the endgame. So far it looks like:

        1. Install raving Alt-right loon into office
        2. Get stuff we want to pander to our misguided rightwing base
        3. Get relected.
        4. Enjoy “freedom and liberty” in a nation without healthcare, education or clean air or water, with rising crime and unemployment.
        5:????
        6:Profit!

        Seriously, that what it looks like and I can’t imagine a sane person, even a Republican, thinking this is going to be sustainable. At some point when 4 get’s out of control, 3 will stop happening….

        • dshwa

          It’s clearer when you realize that Republicans embraced marketing and made themselves a brand identity more than anything else. That supercedes rationality in the minds who’ve joined the team. At that point, the policies don’t actually matter, you’re voting for them.

        • Skadi

          In their vision of the future, police become the private troops of the rich, doctors only serve the rich, food and water are redirected to the rich, who are the only ones allowed to live in the few unspoiled areas. They dream of creating their own Galt’s Gulch, because they have isolated themselves from their fellow Americans for so long they don’t understand the concept of interdependence.

          • C4TWOMAN

            But wasn’t the point of John Gault a Randroid Ubermenchen “can-do” meritocracy? [ ignore the viability, and focus on the fantasy] By using influence to rig the system, they’re admitting you CAN’T get rich by merit alone.

            I think you’re basically correct. I’m just not sure how these people justify all this cognitive dissonance without their heads exploding. And when the fantasy comes crashing down, you know they’ll blame Obama/liberals.

          • Skadi

            A meritocracy with an important question left unanswered: Who cleans Galt’s john?

    • zerosumgame0005

      the school most likely thought she was paying them back for her wasting their time

  • Bitter Scribe

    Can a lawyer really be sanctioned for lying about something outside of a legal proceeding? Because if so, I don’t know how any politicians can have law licenses.

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      not sure about lying – but yeah, to be licensed they have some crazy standards. I looked into the issues when I was going to apply to law school (schools pre-screen for htese issues, I’m guessing cause a grad who doesn’t get a license looks bad).
      anyway, the standards range by state…I tried to look up the rules for D.C. but the D.C. bar website is a mess.

  • whitroth

    I’m hoping she’s disbarred. What*ever* will Trumpolini do then?

    • Pierre_de_Fermat

      He don’t need no “laws” or “law-people” or whatever. He is too busy destroying civilization.

  • Left-wing Fascist Ron

    SOMEBODY has to be regretting her career choices right about now.

    • Reddishrabbit

      I know I do. Why did I not become a competitive drinker? I coulda been a contender, I coulda been somebody!

    • zerosumgame0005

      bet she loves her alt-career right now!

  • DahBoner

    Kellyanne Conways phone is ringing off the hook.
    https://media4.giphy.com/media/VLhpp8OrCii7m/giphy.gif

  • Damian L

    The professors point out that “It is professional misconduct for a lawyer to [e]ngage in conduct involving dishonesty, fraud, deceit, or misrepresentation” SERIOUSLY????????ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!

    • kareemachan

      Talk to lawyers giving their time to the ACLU.

  • I fear for the safety of those lawyers filing briefs, under the current regime, Trump will try to have them disbarred. He’s a thin-skinned prick. Hope he doesn’t have the authority to do that.

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