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Morning Wonkers! Here’s a nifty website to find out when and where your Congress critter is holding a town hall this week. And here’s some of the things we may be talking about today!

Contrary to popular belief, we don’t get a dime of that mythical George Sorry-O’s cash, we’re funded by readers like you! Help us pay our bills and we’ll love you forever!

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  • Nounverb911
    • therblig

      same.

  • Nounverb911
    • snigsy

      The beer belly is realistic.

    • cmd resistor

      I also see a future in privatized detention centers.

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Who needs a State Department when you have your personal lawyer.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨
    • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

      oops–bad copy pasta.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Trump’s New Travel Ban Will Look A Lot Like The Old One, Stephen Miller Says http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/stephen-miller-new-immigration-ban_us_58ad281ee4b0d0a6ef463e24?ncid=inblnkushpmg00000009

    Keep it up, shithead. It was for this exact reason — telling us what its real purpose was — that the last EO got bitchslapped.

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨
    • Nounverb911
    • PubOption

      ‘Heaven’s Gate’ was way too long.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      I remember when Jesus walked upon the waterboard.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      If Heaven Has an Unquestioned Dictator on a Golden Throne, Why Can’t America?

    • Longstreet63

      We all remember the court case that affirmed God as Eternal Dictator according to Heaven’s Constitution…

    • Rick Hill

      Yeah. Strong vetting. Live a life of complete sin but recant and ask forgiveness and you’re in. Real tight security, gawd

  • Nounverb911
    • Msgr_MΩment

      …and his teeth would have termites.

    • Creepoman

      Never realized how long his fucking neck is – probably not the only area where he is the polar opposite of Yertle McConnell.

      • puredog

        I never noticed that that portrait lovingly depicted his double chin.

  • MynameisBlarney
  • Nounverb911
  • BadKitty904

    Republicans – and their corporate owners – have always given zero fucks about what Americans think. McConnell is simply a lil’ more upfront about it…

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/33690413517144beb444318ff72f261995421efd8515f5e9ef382e140e051c54.jpg

  • dslindc
    • snigsy

      That’s his polite way of saying “shut up and sit down.”

    • BadKitty904

      I wish the Nobel Prize Committee would praise me for my unstinting work in the field of goofing off.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      Didn’t realize that a tepid, mealy mouth “anti-semitism is bad” really equates to “fighting” anything.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        I thought the transcript said “anti-semitism is bad, m’kay?”

      • WotsAllThisThen

        “The Fighting Anti-Semitism” is the name of his football team.

    • Michael R

      They really should give him the respect he deserves

      “Black guys counting my money! I hate it. The only kind of people I want counting my money are little short guys that wear yarmulkes every day.”

      • Longstreet63

        See? That’s fighting antisemitism right there: giving jobs to The Jews!

    • WotsAllThisThen

      I only read the first book because everyone else did, but now I love this woman.

      • dslindc

        Her Twitter account is a master class in trolling idiots these days.

    • wait! what?

      J.K. Rowling and the Deathly Snark

  • Alienist

    The penultimate bullet point was the best news I expect to get all day.

    • That was supposed to be Morning Nice Time, but Word Press is being all janky today.

      • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

        Suuure it is!

    • Msgr_MΩment

      „Wovon man nicht sprechen kann, darüber muss man schweigen.” Wittgenstein

      — as for that of which we cannot speak, we must remain silent.

      • “That’ll be enough of that Mexi-speak, I tell you whut!”

      • Longstreet63

        Stop knowing things, elitist!

  • dslindc
  • alwayspunkindrublic

    I really look forward to a new wave of fat-assed border militia types in camo, sitting around on their lawn chairs with their feet up on the beer cooler, getting drunk and pointing rifles at anything that moves. They have a really good track record down here.

    • BadKitty904

      The diff is that now they’ll be paid with OUR tax dollars.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Did you hear the announcement? Trump is “taking the shackles off.” They’ve had itchy trigger fingers building up for years, now you’ll see some serious “prosecutorial discretion” in the justice department.

    • JohnBull

      I thought these people were the “makers.”

    • MynameisBlarney

      It will be like those two genius “hunters” from the other day.

    • Lori

      The best we can hope for is that they’ll stay in their lawn chairs. The last time the “volunteer border patrol” was really active a group of them ended up breaking into a family’s house and murdering them while trying to steal money to fund their little army.

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murders_of_Raul_and_Brisenia_Flores

      • wait! what?

        Minutemen American Defense

        “Minutemen American Defense (MAD) is a militant nativist splinter group founded in the late 2000s by Shawna Forde after she left the Minutemen Civil Defense Corps. Various Forde family members and some of Forde’s associates said that Forde began to rob presumed drug dealers in 2009 in hopes of raising funds to benefit her vigilante group.[31]

        Forde said MAD had “about 13,000” members in a “coastal alliance.”[31] However, Chuck Stonex, a former member who quit the organization after Forde’s arrest, said that MAD had about 14 remaining members. He also said that Forde termed its covert missions “Delta One Operations.”

        Stonex said Forde intended to fund the purchase of a 40-acre (16 ha) property in southern Arizona, where she had intended to establish a base for her group’s border operations.[32]” – from the wiks

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        A friend of mine attended the trial. He said Shawna Forde was the stupidest person he’d ever seen. That whole fiasco was kicked off by now-convicted pedophile Chris Simcox…it was like a fuckin’ Debutante Ball for every racist shitbag, cockroach anti-gov militia type in the country. The Master Race in full glory.

    • Longstreet63

      It’s funny, sort of, that the sort of people who talk about “race war” never seem to envision guns in the hands of brown people. Make the Border a shooting gallery, and the bullets will definitely go in both directions. The cartels will see to that if not the coyotes.

  • WotsAllThisThen

    I fucking called it. Trump is going to enlist a “volunteer” deportation force, made up of the most racist militias in the country. They’re already wearing brown (desert camo) shirts too!

    • BadKitty904

      Hey, if it worked in Munich in 1921…

      • Msgr_MΩment

        What a bunch of beerhall putzes.

        • Longstreet63

          The point being, of course, that it Didn’t work in 1921.
          No, it required party politics to work, as it did, in 1932.

          • WotsAllThisThen

            Well then, lucky for us Mitch McConnell has the principles to— oh.

          • Longstreet63

            Hey, said the 1932 Mitch equivalent, as long as he hates Communists, what could go wrong?

          • 1932 Mitch equivalent = Franz von Papen

          • Msgr_MΩment

            And a good thing, or world literature would have lost Mein Jihad.

      • The Wanderer

        It was called the Beer Hall Putsch because everyone was putsching and tschoving to get at the pretzels and Weisswurst.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Why should trained law enforcement be the only ones allowed to murder unarmed brown people.

    • Warned_and_Persistent

      Those less-than-deadeye hunting guides from the other day will need work during the animal shooting offseason, while human hunting goes all year long..

    • MynameisBlarney

      I doubt it will stand the onslaught of legal challenges that will be thrown at that shit.
      And I don’t think the Border Patrol, ICE and DHS want a bunch of armed, barely literate fucktards roaming around in the same area as them.

  • Martini Ambassador

    Winners get to make all the policies, except for those times when they aren’t the winners and then they obstruct the hell out of everything for eight fucking years. Payback is a mighty bitch, Mitch.

  • Nounverb911
    • See? Banner is NOT scribbled nonsensical bullshit.

      • BadKitty904

        AND it’s spelled correctly.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      They’re probably illeagles…

    • Alternative Pony Ron

      That sign should probably have an arrow pointing north, for the next little while.

  • Michael R
  • Robbertjan Brandenburg

    Nothing about Shouty Spice accusing the Ann Frank center of a witch hunt on #45 because saying ‘ anti-semitism is bad’ not being enough? https://twitter.com/SopanDeb/status/834122726063366144

    • Yeah we’re on that. Check back in 10 minutes :)

      • Nounverb911

        I’ll warm up my Spicer cartoons.

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        Nice.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      How many times did he talk about it? Zero or one? And it still wasn’t enough?

      • Longstreet63

        Well, technically, that was him talking about it, so…

    • BadKitty904

      That would be because Donnie is a neo-Nazi bigot, Sphincter.

    • Me not sure

      When was the last time an administration picked a fight with Ann Frank?
      “I like Jews that didn’t get captured by the Nazis. WINNERS!”
      Future Tweet?

  • freakishlypersistent

    Today. We should all be Ukraine. But they probably don’t have Republicans.

    • They have Russians (and Serbs, and Croats, and…)

    • magyar of infinite power

      Ukrainian men are all hot, it’s the law. At least their gymnastic team is, which are the only Ukrainians I have seen in very little clothing. Probably.

  • Longstreet63

    Robert Mugabe: Making Zimbabwe great since 1980. Strongest currency in the world. Period. And no illegal immigration problem at all!

    • The Wanderer

      I think he currently has 7 feet in the grave right now.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Mugabe and Trump, both members in good standing of the “He-Man Democracy hater’s club.”

    • Me not sure

      Only because it’s not yet illegal to flee the country.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        That would be illegal emigration:-)

        • Me not sure

          You joke killing murderer!

          • Longstreet63

            Someone had to do it…

  • memzilla Ω
  • Nounverb911
  • Mr. Blobfish

    Turtle Mandate

    • Nounverb911

      McConnell’s dating Milo?

      • YoBunnyBunny

        Ew.

        • magyar of infinite power

          As if anything those two do isn’t gross already

          • puredog

            They deserve each other.

  • Rick Hill

    “Trump’s cabinet picks can’t staff their own agencies because they keep failing the Trump loyalty test. ”

    Truthfully, both sides do it. Amember how Obama had a hard time with staffing because he had a rule against hiring evil lobbyist associated people?(something like that) It’s the azzact same thing!!

  • Donald trump is anti-semantic.

    • Rick Hill

      But trump’s motivations for it are pure. He likely hates anyone that is better with money than he is and he also instictiviely hates anyone who wants his money. Which, his rich country club friends will verify that the Jews are taking all the monies….

      • Lance Thrustwell

        Not entirely sure you caught Rank’s wordplay there….

        • Rick Hill

          Pffftt. Words. As if they actually mean something in the post trump apocolyptic world

          • Lance Thrustwell

            A point, you have one.

          • Rick Hill

            What I don’t have is a pssy hat to cover it…

      • Alan

        He hates words. Big words.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Paul Ryan is a zombie-eyed grammar starver.

    • BadKitty904
    • Nounverb911

      But,but,but one of his best daughters is Jewish….

    • freakishlypersistent

      What you did there, I see it..

    • magyar of infinite power

      My good sir, you can collect your daily internet, which you have won, at the door.

  • CogitoErgoBibo

    This is sort of a genius idea. March 15 is a Wednesday, is the only real problem. Not sure how much turnout could be assured.
    https://twitter.com/RoguePOTUSStaff/status/834412132389253120

    • PubOption

      If it became a toga party, would that be a bad thing?

      • CogitoErgoBibo

        I think it would make a nice point if a certain number of folks did wear togas. Good idea. Hey, the teabaggers had their costumes. At least ours would be more classic and comfy.

        • snigsy

          Yeah, but you’d look like foreigners.

          • CogitoErgoBibo

            Classy ones. :-)

          • shivaskeeper

            Classic, not classy.

      • Résistance Land Shark Ω

        Well, it means we can go outside without pants ….

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        You just don’t want to put on pants…..and who here could blame you?…

      • magyar of infinite power

        How cold will it be?

        • CogitoErgoBibo

          Based on current temperatures for the past 2 weeks, maybe not. It could be snowing, though, based on history. Guess we’ll need to wait and see.

        • wait! what?

          This is Earth. We don’t “do” cold anymore.

      • puredog

        DC, 3/15? It would probably be a cold thing.

    • The Wanderer

      ‘Brutus, thou sleep’st: awake, and see thyself.
      Shall Rome, & c. Speak, strike, redress!
      Brutus, thou sleep’st: awake!’
      Such instigations have been often dropp’d
      Where I have took them up.
      ‘Shall Rome, & c.’ Thus must I piece it out:
      Shall Rome stand under one man’s awe? What, Rome?
      My ancestors did from the streets of Rome
      The Tarquin drive, when he was call’d a king.
      ‘Speak, strike, redress!’ Am I entreated
      To speak and strike? O Rome, I make thee promise:
      If the redress will follow, thou receivest
      Thy full petition at the hand of Brutus!

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “We prefer to stab in the American people in the back.”
      — Paul “I’m not your Brutis” Ryan

    • puredog

      Ubi vos vere postulo est Brutus cum eo?

    • Msgr_MΩment
      • ¡Persister de la Résistance!

        “That boy is just a P-I-G pig.”

        • Msgr_MΩment

          That SENATOR.

  • BadKitty904

    OK, Hump Day is Dump Trump Day. Let’s keep working to oust the treasonous
    bastard – RESIST!!!

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/f4bea3ffdac060c0ee97a2730475ebd9a0416b88b9581c76640dbea3a27e54b4.jpg

  • reelreeler

    I hope Democrat voters take McConnells statement to heart, because it’s true. Chanting anti-Trump slogans is fine, but republicans show up to vote in ALL elections, and that’s why most state legislatures are republican controlled and get to gerrymander congressional districts in their favor. Republicans have built from the bottom up and Democrats had better wake the fuck up and start doing the same by voting in every election, not just general elections. Question for my fellow democrats, without looking it up, can you name your state legislature representative and senator?

    • My representative is Marie Antoinette
      My senator is Attila the Hun

      • magyar of infinite power

        You take that damn Hunky slander down right this second!!!!!!!!! Attila was a Democrat!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      • puredog

        Red state, huh?

        • NC

          • puredog

            I wouldn’t comment either if those were my representatives.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      Himes, Murphy, Blumenthal.

    • Crystalclear12

      I live in Missouri and I know their names.
      I am just trying out this whole denial of reality thing I have heard so much about

    • ¡Persister de la Résistance!

      “Democrat voters”

      Ehem, Democratic voters.

      • reelreeler

        ehem

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Monk & Parent.

  • PubOption

    The French are planning to use eagles to take down drones. The British used mosquitoes to take down V1 flying bombs during WW II.

    • Rick Hill

      And we are using facts to take down right wing….wait. Nevermind…

    • therblig

      and our president took down his fly during the vietnam war

      • ¡Persister de la Résistance!

        Just like the Battle of the Bulge, but with more piss.

        • magyar of infinite power

          And less bulge

        • therblig

          i’m thinking more “little round top”

    • Me not sure

      Hey! Eagles are ours! Thay have to use flying frogs.

      • Longstreet63

        Actually, the aircraft is called the Dassault Rafale B. The flying Frog was the Mirage 2000.

    • Longstreet63

      To be fair, British Mosquitoes were made of plywood at that time.

  • Nounverb911
    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      That total pain in the …. wait, wut?

    • calliecallie

      Who was the GOP rep? Justin Amash, maybe? He is facing the music with his constituents, despite being a Wacko Bird. And he wants Trump to release his tax returns.

  • freakishlypersistent

    Mitch honestly is the most delusional un-self aware asswipe. How stupid does he think we all are? I realize the assholes that vote for him aren’t too bright, but, see, Mitch, they’re a MINORITY.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      Not in Kentuckistan – I’m writing the mayors of Louisville, Frankfurt, Elizbethtown, Covington, to tell them I’m not spending a penny in Kentucky until they oust him (leaving poor, terror-devastated Bowling Green out of it, though)…

      • Longstreet63

        It’s no good blaming the cities. Most of them are pretty blue. But try threatening to spend no money in Podunk County Kentucky. That just means not stopping at that one interstate gas station.

    • Longstreet63

      The answer to that is: “He keeps getting elected.”
      So he hasn’t underestimated the stupidity of his voters yet.

    • shivaskeeper

      He is not delusional. He knows a large part of the US population is this delusional and unaware. Not just his constituents, but a large swath of the GOP as a whole will believe this because they want to.

  • rocktonsam

    so 6 years of obstruction and crying was winning too!

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Merrick Garland

    • ….would love to kick McConnel in the nuts.

      • Résistance Land Shark Ω

        Testicles: assumes facts not in evidence.

      • puredog

        Apparently he has been saintly about the whole thing, thereby further demonstrating what a good pick he was.

  • wait! what?

    “Now that ISIS has created new bomb dropping drones, and the French are fighting back by literally sending fucking eagles to take down the shitty remote controlled death robots.”

    Eagles, smeagles.

    This is a job for a Johnny Rook.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6f2071c666c60f337eedaf6ef1ed442a5ba7955229b8ea69932c16a1ee97195a.jpg

    • “I came hear to eat meat snacks, and fuck up robots, and I’m all out of meat snacks.”

    • Longstreet63

      Hawkman! Finally a job he can do!

  • YoBunnyBunny

    Several people who have spoken to top officials in the administration
    say they are struggling because talented people would have to take a pay
    cut to join the government, while others are skeptical of working for
    Trump. The White House’s involvement in hiring is adding to those
    challenges, several people with knowledge of the process say.

    But we were told that Trump’s amazetastic business experience (pfffffft!!!) would attract the bestest people to work for him. He would run America’s government like his Trump business. And he appears to be doing that: running the federal government into the ground.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      It’s pretty shocking how few appointments he’s actually filled. I guess golfing at Mar-A-Lago takes precedence over actually working.

      I can’t blame anyone for not wanting to work for Trump, and president Bannon. They both seem like they’d be horrible bosses.

      • Longstreet63

        Geez, whaddaya want a guy to do, work weekends? He don’t get overtime for this job, ya know?

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          I know he loves the power, and the opportunity to grift, and the fact that Goldman Sachs now returns his phone calls, but he never actually wanted to work at the job of being preznit. I bet Kasich regrets turning down Trump’s VP offer to do all of the actual work, since Kasich would get to enact all of his horrible ideas, with Trump acting as the figurehead.

      • mancityRed6

        I seem to recall they thought a lot of the people in those positions would stick around until the new administration could fill them.
        And were shocked when those people left.

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          I think they also told a bunch of people to “GTFO.” Maybe Trump didn’t think they’d take him literally?

          • YoBunnyBunny

            He was expecting a show of groveling and people pleading for their jobs back. Instead they went “Peace out!”

          • Ω cynmac will never surrender

            This has happened to me several times in my career. Always satisfying to walk away from a bad situation.

          • Historicat

            They didn’t respect those people or the work they did, so probably didn’t expect telling them to GTFO would have negative consequences.

    • Longstreet63

      Or perhaps talented people would run from him like their hair was on fire. Although, the pay thing might be true if you mean “soulless Wall Street ghouls” when you say “talented”.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      All the confirmed appointments, IMHO, took the positions so they could grift heartily on ‘murrikkka’s dime. Except two: Mattis and the new NSC Secretary …. one was “ordered”, the other trying to keep sanity, and both do not fit the Trümpian mold for cabinet members.

      • YoBunnyBunny

        Any bets on when how soon the Mattis and McMaster will get crossways with Trump and his sycophants???

        • Résistance Land Shark Ω

          A week … maybe two. And then Donnie Dumbass will learn not to fuck around with career military personnel.

    • magyar of infinite power

      They are running the government, they just aren’t government employees

    • Pierre_de_Fermat

      Plus, in certain circles (including Republican ones), working for this administration won’t be seen as a good thing. I suspect that list is growing. However, as Josh Marshall has pointed out, the positions have to be filled. So, who will work for them? A lot of kooks or otherwise incompetent nuts I suspect. And what happens when Mathis or someone who actually can do the job resigns?

      • cmd resistor

        Yesterday I was thinking they might get so desperate they would start hiring democrats. Ok, wishful thinking.

      • YoBunnyBunny

        I’m sure they can spin this as “reducing government waste” and “draining the swamp”. Or say it’s all part of a hiring freeze until they figure out just what is supposed to be going on with all these un-American, anti-Trump CommuNazi Hillary ClintonObama moles in the federal government.

      • House0fTheBlueLights

        Active duty military, who can’t say no without ending their careers, apparently.

    • Querolous

      Drumph has a problem. His followers have realized that he does not intend to share the grift.

  • Crystalclear12

    Even evil masterminds like Bannon and Trump need minions to complete their work. Pretty sure they went over that in Taking over the World 101.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      That lesson wasn’t in Art of the Deal.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω
      • snark-lurker

        i am the one hiding behind the middle ones

    • shivaskeeper

      Normally minions are required. However DJT is so magnificent he doesn’t need minions. He literally does everything himself and still manages to finish by early afternoon at the latest.

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Trump will look at the anti-semitism very strongly.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      Won’t anybody ask Bebe anything?….

      • TakingAmes

        She’s too busy with “Madame Secretary.”

    • therblig

      America will not tolerate hatred toward any Jews who weren’t asking for it.

    • Longstreet63

      Shut up! He’s the least antisemitic person you ever saw! Don’t you know his son in law is one of them? And he got 306 electoral votes. They said he couldn’t get 220 and he got 306. A landslide, biggest since Reagan. And the biggest inauguration ever, period. Huge.
      I hope that addresses your concern.

    • eka

      with adoration?

    • magyar of infinite power
    • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

      He’ll make sure to tell people when they aren’t doing it right.

  • Alan

    Ummm…yes he is.

  • Michael R

    Would it be wrong if hundreds of people tweeted this to
    Donald Trump a few times a day for a month ?

    https://s32.postimg.org/47gif8zc5/baby_trump_political_cartoon.jpg

  • MizzMazz

    Fake news. Everyone knows Paul Ryan skips leg day.

  • Apple Scruff

    “he’ll pretend to listen to people’s problems before fucking off back to Wisconsin for some squats and a protein shake.’

    Oh please, does this chicken-legged asshole look like he actual does squats? Arms only, people, cause that what the ladies like.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/71ca397c225b40b4119f0a876543923d7230dd3a8f15d008c4cc08a20c1273e3.jpg

  • fishslappingdancer

    Okies, thanks for a fun evening, time for bed. Nos da.

  • Oblios_Cap

    Go eagles! At least your fans won’t boo you.

  • geoffalnutt

    Gee. Mitch McConnell’s summer home in Moscow may become his permanent residence.

  • thewalkindude

    Misspelled words-check;”economic anxiety”-check; no mention of “brown people”-try harder…FB comment on story of food shelves running out of supplies…

    We need more people working and less people looking for free handouts. The working class is all used up and tired and sick of taking care of the other half of the population that thinks they are untitled to be taken care of.

    • suziq

      The other half? Are they just rounding up from that 47% which includes college students and retired people? Yeah-get a job grandma and quit relying on those government SS checks!

      • Boscoe

        -And keep guvvamint out of my Medicare!

    • Boscoe

      You mean all those lazy olds, disabled and students?

    • cmd resistor

      Have to watch out for those untitled people.

      • TakingAmes

        That’s the sub-motto of the GOP. It comes right after “I got mine, fuck everyone else.”

      • thewalkindude

        I wonder if they could write to the DMV and get a new title…

  • Finnabar87

    Have we hit rock bottom yet?

  • Mean shouty losers need to back off and let Mitch do what he does best.

    In unrelated news: Adorable tiny tortoise humps a shoe:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q_mIxTimgJ0

    • Me not sure

      Accomplishes more fucking a shoe than McConnell has in the last eight years fucking a Chao.

      • kittygrrl

        Some people are saying, many people, that Mitch doesn’t do ladies. Pleading for the hackers to release pictures of Mitch mincing around in his wife’s dress and pearls. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. But he does seem inordinately afraid of vaginas.

        • Me not sure

          Well, there was that mysterious business about the Army saying “thanks, but we’ll not be needing you” during the Vietnam War.

          • Tiny kaiju

            His lack of a chin made it hard to keep his helmet strapped on.

          • Me not sure

            Har!

    • Jeffery Campbell

      This little fella has the same amount of “clue” that Mitchy does.

  • andyshelt

    Well, just when you thought Trumpland couldn’t get any fucking weirder, I came (no pun intended!) across this seriously bizarre story about porn star, Jenna Jameson, rushing to the defence of Trump and his Sweden remarks and defending alt-right paedophile Milo Yiannopous.

    http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/jenna-jameson-porn-star-anti-muslim-rant-ku-klux-klan-defence-racist-islamophobia-a7593636.html

    • Jenna does know that they fully intend to do away with the porn industry, right?

      • Marsupial

        Jenna’s not active in the industry anymore. Now she just shrieks about Muslims on Twitter.

    • phoenix00

      Isn’t she also the world’s foremost authority on anti-vax?

  • andyshelt

    A data scientist explains exactly what’s going on with Trump’s speech

    Interesting article about Trump’s mangling of the English language.

    “It’s fascinating in a “Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra” sense. He begins a clause, and finishes it with nonsense filler words but his followers have already used their bias to fill in the meaning. And none of (the rest of) us know what it’s supposed to mean because we’re trying to reconstruct logical sentences, and not filling in with our biases.”

    The article finishes with this multiple choice readers poll

    Do you agree with this theory about Donald Trump’s speech patterns?
    a) Totally – his supporters fill in the blanks
    b) Yes – but he’s not in control of it
    c) No – his supporters appreciate a superior rhetorician
    d) No – his supporters just don’t like long words

    I voted d)

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ab3a022a80f2d54f5e5e1dc56ea36bef4a0326d38972257efb0c5889effc6b74.jpg

    https://www.indy100.com/article/trumps-speech-vocabulary-data-scientist-7592991

    • Sister the Resister

      Thanks – interesting. I ended up choosing the “his supporters totally fill in the blanks” on the poll because I’ve been saying it for months. But I don’t think your “long words” answer is wrong either, just think it applies more to the Dipshit in Charge more than his supporters.

    • Tiny kaiju

      Can we pick more than one? If so, a),b) and d).

  • guppy06

    Zimbabwe’s lovable little dictator, Robert Mugabe, celebrated his 93rdbirthday by praising Trump and denying how many feet he has in the grave

    Most of them aren’t his own.

    • Querolous

      Zimbabe crime statistics have improved. With the $ per ton of their currency, bank robberies just don’t happen in Zimbabwe anymore. Dump trucks make lousy getaway cars

      • phoenix00

        How to stop robberies? Make the cash so worthless it costs more $$ to do the heist than your take! Genius!

  • guppy06

    “While the ACLU should be focusing on much more important activities than monitoring the governor’s Facebook page, we appreciated them identifying a handful of individuals — out of the over 1 million weekly viewers of the page — that may have been inadvertently denied access,” said Amelia ­Chasse, a Hogan spokeswoman.

    Kellyanne! This is how you job is supposed to be done!

  • Riley Whodat Venable

    Thank you.

  • Riley Whodat Venable

    Who knew that Trump wasn’t an evil genius. Hanlon’s law strikes again.

  • Sister the Resister

    OT, and I’ll try to remember to dump it in the open thread late tonight, but this is a really interesting read.
    Donald Trump is dangerous when he’s losing: Trump’s failures at governing feed his illiberalism, by Ezra Klein

    • Marsupial

      … therefore, DO WHAT HE SAYS before he has to force it on you!

  • Lulu’s Mom

    Correction – Jimmy Fallon IS the Trump News Network.

  • orygoon

    Some days I just can’t win, can I?

  • Tiny kaiju

    Winners make policy,losers go home. I have my fingers crossed and am making offers to Ganesha that Turtle Boy will be headed home after the next election.

    • javadavis

      Isn’t he the same guy that said their loser policy was to ensure that the 2008 winner would not be successful in implementing any of his policies?

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