SHARE
Every bit as sleazy as you thought.
Every bit as sleazy as you thought.

So now we know: Richard Nixon almost certainly tried to keep the South Vietnamese government away from peace talks during the Lyndon B. Johnson administration, largely settling one of the great “Yeah, we thought so” questions of American history. Notes taken by Nixon aide H.R. “Bob” Haldeman show Nixon directing aides to “monkey wrench” the peace talks, which had been announced just the week prior to the election. Nixon always denied any involvement in dissuading the South Vietnamese away from the negotiations, but the notes, found in the Nixon presidential library by historian John A. Farrell while working on a forthcoming biography of Nixon, appear to confirm Nixon tried to sink the peace talks to keep Hubert Humphrey from benefiting from an end to the Vietnam war.

Says Farrell,

There’s really no doubt this was a step beyond the normal political jockeying, to interfere in an active peace negotiation given the stakes with all the lives […] Potentially, this is worse than anything he did in Watergate.

And here we thought Hillary Clinton’s email server was far, far worse than Watergate.

It was already known that Nixon ally Anna Chenault, the widow of Gen. Claire Lee Chenault — the famous leader of the “Flying Tigers” during WW II — had served as Nixon’s go-between to the South Vietnamese government, and that she had urged Saigon’s ambassador to stay out of Paris peace talks announced by the Johnson administration in late October 1968, because if Nixon won the election, he could supposedly win the South Vietnamese a better deal in the talks.

Learning of this through wiretaps and surveillance, Johnson was livid. He ordered more bugs and privately groused that Nixon’s behavior amounted to “treason.” But lacking hard evidence that Nixon was directly involved, Johnson opted not to go public.

The notes Mr. Farrell found come from a phone call on Oct. 22, 1968, as Johnson prepared to order a pause in the bombing to encourage peace talks in Paris. Scribbling down what Nixon was telling him, Mr. Haldeman wrote, “Keep Anna Chennault working on SVN,” or South Vietnam.

A little later, he wrote that Nixon wanted Senator Everett Dirksen, a Republican from Illinois, to call the president and denounce the planned bombing pause. “Any other way to monkey wrench it?” Mr. Haldeman wrote. “Anything RN can do.”

So yes, that sure as heck looks like Nixon doing his very best to undercut a possible peace deal that might have won Humphrey the election — oh, and shortened the Vietnam war by five or six years.

In addition, the notes show Nixon asked his running mate, Spiro Agnew (which Dick Cavett discovered anagrams to “grow a penis”) to threaten CIA head Richard Helms he’d lose his job in a new administration if he didn’t provide inside information to the Nixon campaign:

“Go see Helms,” Mr. Haldeman wrote. “Tell him we want the truth — or he hasn’t got the job.”

He seems as nice as we always thought he was.

The New York Times piece on the Haldeman notes points out that while several historians agree Farrell has nailed down what most have only concluded from circumstantial evidence, there are still quite a few known unknowns to the history that can never be resolved:

Still, as tantalizing as they are, the notes do not reveal what, if anything, Mr. Haldeman actually did with the instruction, and it is unclear that the South Vietnamese needed to be told to resist joining peace talks that they considered disadvantageous already.

Moreover, it cannot be said definitively whether a peace deal could have been reached without Nixon’s intervention or that it would have helped Mr. Humphrey. William P. Bundy, a foreign affairs adviser to Johnson and John F. Kennedy who was highly critical of Nixon, nonetheless concluded that prospects for the peace deal were slim anyway, so “probably no great chance was lost.”

So we can’t say for certain that had Nixon not engaged in his ratfuck of the peace talks, Humphrey would have won or a peace agreement would have been worked out even if he had. The article also notes it’s unclear whether LBJ would have gone public with Nixon’s interference if he’d had proof, although Tom Johnson, then a note taker for White House meetings about the issue, thinks it would have made all the difference:

“It is my personal view that disclosure of the Nixon-sanctioned actions by Mrs. Chennault would have been so explosive and damaging to the Nixon 1968 campaign that Hubert Humphrey would have been elected president,” said Mr. Johnson, who went on to become the publisher of The Los Angeles Times and later chief executive of CNN.

As it turns out, the war went on for another five years under Nixon, who didn’t actually have a secret plan to end it. Another 22,000 Americans and god only knows how many Vietnamese died in the war during Nixon’s tenure, not to mention the expansion of the war into Laos and Cambodia. On the up side, Nixon sure won that election in 1968, didn’t he?

History nerds should go read the full article, which includes a nice sampling of historians arguing over just how groundbreaking Farrell’s discovery is, and while you’re at it, take a look at Farrell’s own piece about the Haldeman notes in Sunday’s NYT. And if you’re of a mind to, you can pre-order Farrell’s biography, Richard Nixon: The Life, which will be out in March. That little linky will give Yr Wonket a nice kickback, yay.

Also, hey, have you guys heard any other presidential candidates promising they had a secret plan to end a war, or trying to influence American foreign policy before even taking office? You’d think they’d know that’s a pretty scummy, even illegal, thing to do. Ah well. Those who fail to learn from history are American voters.

[NYT / NYT Sunday Review / Smithsonian]

$
Donate with CCDonate with CC
  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    And Nixon’s excuse maker former assistant will be senior communications director for the National Security Council. That’s not going to cause any problems at ALL!!!

  • beingreleased

    He had a very good reason for doing this though. If he hadn’t he might have lost the election.

    Fry: Bender? You stole the atom?
    Bender: Yeah, but I can explain, it’s very valuable.

    • therblig

      “Your criminal records have also been expunged. However, I have to warn you against breaking any laws in the future.”

      “Question. What if I see something that I wanna take and it belongs to someone else?”

      “Then you will be arrested.”

      “But what if I want it more than the person who has it?”

      “Still illegal.”

      “That doesn’t follow. No, I want it more, sir. Do you understand me? What are you laughing at? What? I can’t have a discussion with this gentleman?”

      ―Rocket and Rhomann Dey

  • Beanz&Berryz

    But Trump announced his (nonexistent) war-ending (or war-winning) plans publicly, so at least he has a smidgen less crimey-ness than Nixon, in regard to war-related rat-fuckery. As for colluding with a foreign power to fuck with a Presidential election, Trump kicks Nixon’s small-ball, sweaty-browed ass…

    • puredog

      Hey, wait. It’s Tuesday! I want my secret Trumpy infotainment on Hacking: For Realz!

      • Celtic_Gnome

        Now, now. He said Tuesday or Wednesday. Honestly, don’t you have any patience at all?

  • goonemeritus

    So his secret plan for peace was to not have any.

    • beingreleased

      And people say Trump knows nothing about presidential history.

    • MynameisBlarney

      Once everything is dead, there WILL be peace and quiet, by gaowd!

      • Unpresidented Ron

        Yes, there will be peace on Earth. I just hope we humans are around to enjoy it.
        – Swami Beyondananda

  • Unpresidented_in_Seattle

    ‘… a better deal …’ where have I recently heard that?

  • MynameisBlarney

    Ah yes, the GOP and their long and torrid love affair with treason.

    • DainBramage

      But it’s not treason if the new president does it.
      Sorry, I threw up in my mouth a little.

      • puredog

        He will not be the fucking “new president” until he is actually the “president.” In other words, you have more than a couple of weeks to, er, get your affairs in order.

    • theCryptofishist

      But they are incapable of committing treason. What’s good for the GOP is good for the country and all. And everything that a democrat does is, by definition, treason. Except dropping the atomic bomb. Never treasonous even if President Jell Stein were to do it.
      Confused?

    • BadKitty904

      Time to classify the GOP as a “domestic terrorism” group.

      • TJ Barke

        A minority party setting policy explicitly defying the electorate? Sounds like libety to me!

        • BadKitty904

          I calls it TRANNY!!1!

          • MynameisBlarney

            Easy there…
            TLM will show up if you keep posting his fetish…

        • puredog

          Are you pronouncing “libety” with a North Carolinian accent?

  • An Outhouse for the Resistance

    Robert Parry (https://consortiumnews.com/) has maintained that the evidence (i.e. tapped phone calls) for Nixon’s treason was the reason for the Watergate break in.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      I’ve heard that theory from others

  • Picabo

    This book is a MUST read on how we got into Vietnam. And yes, Nixon played a part. We should have learned a lesson after the French got their asses kicked at the Battle of Dien Bien Phu. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/59e9fdd1f91128516b9cd688920a9e2b109355295fd7b3e24099e93c0d76658a.jpg

    • puredog

      Also “Dien Bien Phu: Hell in a Very Small Place” by Bernard Fall.

      • Picabo

        Bernard Fall was a great man who should be remembered by every American. Sadly, few people would recognize that name.

        • Rok E Raccoon

          Highly recommend Fall’s “Street Without Joy”. To bad the ‘best and brightest’ didn’t take the time to read it.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    So we can’t say for certain that had Nixon not engaged in his ratfuck of the peace talks, Humphrey would have won or a peace agreement would have been worked out even if he had.

    We can still call him a lying asshole, however. Just like PEOTUS!

    /FFS

  • mancityRed6

    So, who is going to do the Reagan biography that uncovers everything we already suspect about the Iran hostage deals?

    • Unpresidented_in_Seattle

      Purely coincidental. Iran only releases hostages on 1/20 every 4 years. /s

  • Picabo

    But he never used a private email server, so it’s OK.

  • BadKitty904

    And how many young Americans may have needlessly died because of this Republican treachery?

    • Oblios_Cap

      It’s alright. There was a concerted effort to draft only the poorest of America’s youth; sort of a war on poverty. Kinda.

    • Scopedog

      Too many.

      And let’s not forget those who died under Bush and Cheney.

  • gratuitous

    Oh you libruls! Always getting things wrong. SVN is shorthand for “something very nice,” which makes total sense because Anna Chenault was known far and wide for her shopping skills, and ability to pick just the right gift. You think it meant “South Vietnam,” which is just obvious nonsense!

    By the way, military veterans who vote Republican because they’re supposedly strong on national defense? How many more corpses will they have to make out of your comrades in arms before you realize what a bad deal you’re getting? How many names are on that goddam wall because of Republican chicanery, and not because America needed defending?

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      And how few Republicans and their children end up fighting in those wars…

      • BadKitty904

        Cowards and chickenhawks, one and all.

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        Lots of Republicans’ children, but only the POOR ones.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        They did a study of veterans in both houses of Congress in the 80’s, and the Dems vastly outnumbered the Republicans, because the Republicans were able to go to college right out of high school and avoid the draft while the Dems ended up serving and getting their degrees through the GI Bill.

    • Unpresidented_in_Seattle

      The same vets who will now be forced to seek medical treatment at the nearest doc-in-the-box, put the fees on their credit card and wait for a voucher?

    • thixotropic jerk

      so many details, so little time

  • Oblios_Cap

    Treason is cool with the GOP as long as it benefits them. I mean you can’t spell treason without reason, amirite?

    • BadKitty904

      ANYTHING is cool with the GOP as long as it benefits them.

      PARTY BEFORE PATRIOTISM

    • SigDeFlyinMonky

      You can’t spell gestapo without GOP.

  • Our lives are playthings for the powerful and wealthy, nothing but pawns to be sacrificed and discarded as the need arises.

    Why do we continue to fight their wars and support their systems?

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      Mongo only pawn in game of life

    • TJ Barke

      What, fighting for freedom from exploitation? What are we? A buncha socialists?

    • Unpresidented Ron

      If I could think of an alternative I’d’ve done that decades ago. Instead, I try to maintain as much of a distance as I can, for someone who needs electricity to live and food to eat.

    • tehbaddr

      Unpatriotic, sad, low energy, why do you hate ‘Merika?

      • thixotropic jerk

        Burn the witch! Burn! BURN!

  • Mpeg

    Funny – – all I wanted for Christmas was to learn once and for all who murdered Tom Clancy in his sleep. But, this’ll do~

    • Jenny

      Killery Clinton with an assist from Obummer.

  • beingreleased

    They would have known this years ago if historians had just read Nixon’s twitter feed.

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    From Tricky Dick to Dickless Donnie- the GOP has been a direct threat to our democracy for decades

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Are there any good Dicks left?

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        Clark is dead, Cheney will never die, Sargent and York have been gone for years, Martin is gone, Smothers is still around, Morris should be gone but isn’t- I guess the only good one is Dale

      • tehbaddr

        My fuck-stick still works!

      • OrG

        Dick Lucas (Subhumans)

      • MeerkatsRMammals

        One or two…maybe…

    • BadKitty904

      The Republican Party has done more actual damage to America in the past fifty years than all of our nation’s other enemies combined.

    • MeerkatsRMammals

      Too many dicks if you ask me…

    • Scopedog

      But I thought that Bill Clinton’s penis and Hillary’s emails were the direct threat to our democracy…

  • Toomush_Inferesistance

    In 71 or 72, whenever Nixon announced the reduction in troops, My neighbor in Tacoma, a 54 year old black woman, knocked on my window with a bottle of Johnny Walker Red in her hand (the only thing she ever drank). I came over to her house and asked what we were drinking to. She worked on the army base sewing uniform insignia. ” Lots of new work,” she said, with a grimace. Apparently, along with bringing back some of the troops, Nixon was replacing them with more…

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Those who fail to learn from history are Trump voters.

    /fixed
    /FFS

    • Oblios_Cap

      Christ! So they’re going to bring back HUAC?

      • Unpresidented Ron

        Almost certainly.

  • OrG

    I can say it.Without this ratfuckery no president nixon.

    • BadKitty904

      Sounds very familiar.

      • OrG

        Last repuglican elected prez without dirty tricks:Eisenhower.

        • BadKitty904

          The Republicans are fully aware that their repressive policies do not represent the beliefs of the majority of Americans. So, Republicans know they cannot win a fair election.

          Consequently, they lie, cheat, steal, and commit treason in order to retain the only things they’re really interested in – power and control.

          • Scopedog

            ^This. Plus they also rely on those clueless folks on the far Left who keep going after the Democratic candidates because they are somehow worse than the GOP.

  • goonemeritus

    So in retrospect how happy are the South Vietnamese with the deal Nixon got them?

    • Oblios_Cap

      Since we’re gone and the country is unified, I must think most of them are pretty cool with it.

      • goonemeritus

        Plus many of them got a cool ride on an aircraft carrier.

        • Bitter Scribe

          We accepted hundreds of thousands of refugees from Vietnam into this country, and are undeniably better off for it, as they and their children have proved almost without exception to be valuable citizens. (Plus their cuisine is terrific.)

          Contrast with today, when not even guys who worked as Army translators in Iraq and Afghanistan–and whose lives are now in constant peril because of it–can get visas to come to the U.S.

          • Nasty Girl Brianna

            My best friend is the child of two Vietnam refugees who came here after the war. Her father is a very successful businessman in Texas but he lost his dad at age 9 and became very overprotective with his children. Their stories are definitely fascinating to hear.

          • thixotropic jerk

            Obvs they should have read the fine print at the bottom of their Uncle Sam contract.

        • doktorzoom

          If you’re in the mood for some heartbreak, watch PBS’s documentary “Last Days in Vietnam.” Among other bits of imperial hubris, the American Embassy never gave any thought to an evacuation plan for Vietnamese who’d worked with the Americans, because how could America lose a war?

          • thixotropic jerk

            Wait? America lost a war? Unpossible! Maybe we just didn’t win it or something?

          • Celtic_Gnome

            Oh, we won it. We just didn’t win it as bigly as we’d like.

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      But other than that, Mrs. Thieu, how did you like the war?

    • Unpresidented Ron

      Given that Vietnam’s economy is doing extremely well, they probably couldn’t give a damn.

      • I own a Nikon made in Vietnam.

        Also some crummy Hanes underwear whose elastic lost its snap. Keep our underwear money in Central America: Buy Fruit of The Loom, made in El Salvador!

  • Bitter Scribe

    The cherry on this irony sundae is that when Kissinger engaged with North Vietnam in the Paris Peace Accord talks, South Vietnam was frozen out. S.V. President Nguyen Van Thieu was furious, but Nixon gave him the middle finger.

    It’s too bad that of those three bastards, Kissinger was the only one who didn’t eventually get what he deserved.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      there’s still time…

      • puredog

        He remains competent to be tried, if anybody had the balls to indict him.

        • Zippy W Pinhead

          plus I can think of any number of things with votes that could and should happen to him

          • thixotropic jerk

            Strip him and drop him off in Santiago for one.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      I’m sorry. Cancer is too good for Kissinger. How did you guys make my Grrrrrr level go up so many notches? We hated Nixon with the heat of several suns, and that heat is apparently both restorable and easily transferable….

      • AnnieGetYerFun

        My father-in-law once confronted Kissinger at a fundraiser they were both at, and Kissinger bid a hasty retreat. If only everyone who met him were willing to ask him why he is Satan’s taint….

        • thixotropic jerk

          That has such a nice alliteration to it– “Satan’s taint.”

  • AnnieGetYerFun

    In addition, the notes show Nixon asked his running mate, Spiro Agnew (which Dick Cavett discovered anagrams to “grow a penis”)

    Dave Barry noted this decades ago.

    • Poorly Behaved Résistanista

      I’m seriously pissed at Dave Barry because I was reading a thing in did in the W Post the other day wherein he said how both candidates were so flawed and awful. Fuck that and I quit reading it.

      • AnnieGetYerFun

        I’ve been seething over that for a while. Someone told me once that Dave Barry was kind of a libertarian (I never bothered to check to see if this was true), so I actually expected a lot worse.

        • Lotsa people who get book advances & the like (as opposed to those w/ reg’lar salaries/wages w/ taxes deducted) bitterly resent having to file/pay taxes based on Estimated Quarterly Income reports. This can lead directly to glibertarianism.

          • AnnieGetYerFun

            I get it. And I hate it, too. But there’s a difference between wanting a simpler tax code and wanting the government to disappear.

      • Scopedog

        Every time I heard the “both candidates were so flawed and awful” line, even from people I regarded as friends, I had to fight the urge to just unscrew their heads against the threads.

        It is such bullshit, a completely lazy and inaccurate belief, one that could be dismissed if one just did the fucking research.

    • doktorzoom

      I’m pretty sure I remember first reading it in a Dave Barry column, but that he attributed it to Cavett.

      • AnnieGetYerFun

        Your memory is much better than mine.

  • Ray in VT

    So from worst to mildest it goes Nixon/Vietnam, Clinton email server and then Watergate? But what about the half dozen Watergates from Obama’s time?

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      Obviously the email server thing is the worstest worst of all worsties.

    • Paperless Tiger

      Russiagate will top them all.

    • beingreleased

      But Obamacare proves he was worse than Hitler!

    • Scopedog

      What “half dozen Watergates from Obama’s time”?

      ….Unless this is snark, and in that case, I stand corrected.

  • TheGrandWaz00

    Going from my early teens to young adulthood during the Nixon years is how I learned to despise Republicans. Nothing has changed.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      my contempt for them has only grown- so that changed

    • OrG

      It has actually gotten worse.

      • TheGrandWaz00

        They’re still the same, we just have access to more details now in real time.

    • beingreleased

      I learned by reading Bloom County in the ’80s.

    • Oblios_Cap

      And Reagan reinforced all of that.

    • MynameisBlarney

      Waddaya mean nothing has changed?

      They’ve become even more evil. They don’t even try to hide it anymore.

    • Mildred Broxon

      Yes. I recently had a sweatshirt made: Remember Nixon?—I do!

      Feel free to copy.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      A guy came up to me at work with a big grin on his face and said, “Nixon died.”

      I couldn’t get the shit-eating grin off my face all day.

  • puredog

    “And here we thought Hillary Clinton’s email server was far, far worse than Watergate.”
    And it was, there can be no doubt. However, we must now investigate whether it was also worse than these *alleged* misdeeds of Nixon’s. Trey? Trey? You busy?

    • MeerkatsRMammals

      Pfft…that was in the past! They don’t like to discuss the past! Unless it involves Democrats or the Clintons of course (eye roll)

  • Idiokraticdrumpfenjugend

    Republicans: They were vile motherfuckers in the past, and they are still vile motherfuckers.

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    Vietghazi!

  • calliecallie

    Sometimes I think this country would be better off if it were run by engineers rather than politicians. I find them to be a bit too rigid in their thinking, but in my experience they are almost painfully intent on always doing the right thing for the public good. Politicians, on the other hand, seem only intent on doing the right thing for themselves.

    • puredog

      Behold, I give you: President Scott Dilbert Adams. I mean, “Adams” is a good presidential name, right? RIGHT?!!?!

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        But Scott Adams is a self-felllating garbage human?

        • Zippy W Pinhead

          He only aspires to be self fellating- he’s not that talented

          • therblig

            “if only doctors could use rib bones to increase penis length, it might just be possible”

            conversation between dilbert and wally, while alice looks on.

      • calliecallie

        This seems a valid point, but I just checked the google, and I don’t think he’s actually an engineer. He worked with them, but he has an MBA. Still, I will amend my earlier statement. Civil engineers. At least they are civil.

        • Thaumaturgist

          Electrical engineers. They’re juiced.

          • cmd resistor

            My kid is one. And he is basically a decent person.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Herbert Hoover was pretty fucking great.

  • Lance Thrustwell

    Because it is never the wrong time for a Hunter Thompson quote:

    “He has poisoned our water forever. Nixon will be remembered as a classic case of a smart man shitting in his own nest. But he also shit in our nests, and that was the crime that history will burn on his memory like a brand. By disgracing and degrading the Presidency of the United States, by fleeing the White House like a diseased cur, Richard Nixon broke the heart of the American Dream.”

    • resistance_fighter_rosenbomb

      Imagine what he would have said about Trump…!

      • Teresaatucker

        Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !ut420c:
        On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
        !ut420c:
        ➽➽
        ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash720WebWireGetPay$97Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★::::::!ut420c:….,……..

    • Ducksworthy

      How quaint.

  • Crystalclear12

    I always thought his parents named him perfectly.

    Dick.

  • baconzgood

    Imagine what we will find out about Trump in 45 years.

    • Unpresidented Ron

      I dunno, I suspect Donnie and his pets are way better at erasing history than Tricky Dick’s people were.

    • FukuiSanYesOta

      The partial head-capybara is in charge?

    • Nasty Girl Brianna

      Whatever they find will have to be excavated by archaeologists wearing nuclear hazmat suits.

    • MynameisBlarney

      Meh…
      Only difference will be the confirmation of what we already know.

    • therblig

      hopefully – “After being impeached 44 years ago and losing all his supposed riches, the former president moved into a refrigerator box on the outskirts of Queens, NY and has not been seen in decades.”

      • thixotropic jerk

        Wait– so he’s not living on that deserted island with Jimmy H?

    • Rick Hill

      It’ll take 45 years to outline all his scams and grifts

      • thixotropic jerk

        I misread that as “all his scars and gifts” which I guess might refer to not releasing his medical records and his innumerable *cough*cough* “talents.”

    • Arse Grammatica

      We already know a lot of it.
      Didn’t matter.

      • Scopedog

        Yep–because, you know, emails.

    • onedollarjuana

      I think they will ultimately prove to be petty acts of greed. Except possibly for his love of young “women”.

  • Ezio Auditore
  • Anna Elizabeth
  • Jenny

    I’m sick and could really go for some pho. Dang it!

  • mailman27

    I’ve heard LBJ tapes on the radio that go a little something like this:

    LBJ: (talking to Republican Senate leader Everett Dirksen) That’s treason, Ev

    Dirksen: I know, Lyndon.

    • MynameisBlarney

      Yeah, I remember that.

  • MynameisBlarney
  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    Republican Motto – “If we can win, rig the game. If we can’t rig the game, break the game.”

    • Beanz&Berryz

      If we can’t rig the game, burn the house down.

      • MynameisBlarney

        “If we can’t burn it down, take off and nuke it from orbit, it’s the only way to be sure.”

    • puredog

      Instead of continuing to muse vis a vis the Democratic “strategy,” “And how’s that working out for ya?” (Wonkette snark), I am beginning to think that we must affirmatively look at Dem strategists and ask, “what gene is it that these people need to square off effectively against the New Rethuglican?” I just really think that I would hate the answer.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        We must address the sociopath gap!

      • BeachBum

        You may be on to something. I always thought the Seven Cardinal Sins were things NOT to do. I never thought they could get one the Presidency. I have completely overestimated the moral worth of the American people.

    • Martini Ambassador

      22k or so lives be damned. That’s other people’s problem.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    /dick joke

  • Anna Elizabeth

    OT, or F’ theGOP, I gots new hat!

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ccae39d5c39499ea4206086bb72a27c4b83e242fdfdb475a03ebb915d5284fa3.jpg

    I saved enough on sale food items to afford the Newsie Cap I’ve been wanting. :)

    • FukuiSanYesOta

      Is there a wonkette “hat of the week”?

    • tehbaddr

      It could benefit by the inclusion of a propeller on the top!

    • BadKitty904

      Very sporty!

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Thanx, Darlin’. I have scarves and heels that match. :)

    • BeachBum

      I like it ! Bob Dylan likes it ! Song Leopard Skin Pillbox Hat fur reelz likes it !

    • Celtic_Gnome

      Okay. That’s stunning.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Thank you. I love hats and accessories of various kind. I’ve been wanting this for awhile, and with the good sales on food, figured I could spare a few bucks for something fun. :)

    • onedollarjuana

      Saw a mink stole and fur coat in a thrift shop last weekend. Shoulda bought ’em. I think wearing animals is coming back into style!

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Since this is obviously faux fur, and I can think of no good reason you would seek to shame me over a $5 dollar treat for myself, my answer is thus: *block*.

    • Scopedog

      Very cute…:)

      Unfortunately, no hat will ever look that good on me…I’m a bit jealous…

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Thank you. I wouldn’t say never, you just have to find the proper hat. I love hats, and I’m always on the lookout for a new one.

  • TX Dept. of Brad Relations

    OT: Really want to rage? This is a video of a bunch of rich people in fancy clothes at a fancy party cheering about the repeal of the ACA, i.e. poor people losing their insurance.

    Disgusting:
    https://twitter.com/ABC/status/815983445281124354

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      Yay for the repeal of our 3% tax increase!

      Sorry about all the dead poorz…

    • BadKitty904

      Republican SOP.

    • PubOption

      He won’t share the stage with a real eagle.

    • Morningside

      I can’t bring myself to watch this.

  • therblig

    “I am not (as competent as Nixon when it comes to being) a crook” – DJT

  • Mavenmaven

    Alec Baldwin beats Rich Little IMHO.

    • Yr. Gma

      True, that.

    • javadavis

      Baldwn (already) has more and more dramatic material to work with.

  • This is one of those rare times where bugs really are a feature.

    Let’s hope some of those bugs infest the Trump residence soon.

    • doktorzoom

      I was talking about this story with Kid today and we decided that if Humphrey had won, he might have had the honor of being the first president to resign when his secret taping system became known. Because alternate history tends to be as fucked as the real thing.

  • Yr. Gma

    Yes, Nixon was an evil bastard. I remember him well. Hell, I remember him when he ran against John Kennedy. He was a vile, duplicitous liar, and he was homely as a mud fence (as my gma would say). However, I was never as nervous about anything he might do as I am about the Orange Anus. Nixon, for all his wickedness, had principles. Dark and twisted principles, yes, but Donnie has NO principles. He lives to suck up all the praise he can get. Period. That’s his goal: fill the Narcissist pit inside him. So what he might do is entirely unpredictable. With Nixon, there was a more-or-less limited list of possibilities.

    On the bright side, it is just as possible as anything else that someone from our side will get hold of Donnie and fill his narcissist hole and convince him that progressive policies are the way to gain the adoration of the masses. Since they have no core principles, narcissists can be turned shockingly easily.

    • Beanz&Berryz

      Yes… Donnie could be convinced to turn against the Hard Right as soon as he figures out that (1) they make up no more than 20% of the population (2) their policies are fully hated by 70% of the population. He may be a rat-fucking rat, but he might be our rat-fucking rat someday.

      • thixotropic jerk

        HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!!!! Pardon me, excuse me, but the thought of Der Jackoff Trimp (S-self) “turning” into anything other than the even more bugfuck crazyfuck that he already is gave me an attack of the funnies. Benefits we will accrue from his “administration” will be accidental at best and entirely overshadowed by the horrific “policies” already erupting out of his terminally corrupt piehole. And congress. And soon to be judiciary.

      • Vagenda and Tiara

        I thought he might actually be an OK president, since I thought he was just pandering to the right to get elected. However, after seeing who he picked for his cabinet, and VP, and seeing that he intends to grant huge tax cuts to himself, I realized he’s going to be an unmitigated disaster. The strange part is that he was a Democrat most of his life. I KNOW he doesn’t give a crap about outlawing abortion or gay marriage, but he keeps pandering to the right, so who knows what he’s capable of? As long as the republican congress lets him steal, he’ll go along with their agenda.

    • C4TWOMAN

      It’s down to this: Nixon might have been evil, but he was competent. Trump is evil AND incompetent. The worst combination.

      • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

        Yes, Nixon was a Machivellian genius compared to Trump. Very Bigly scary.

      • Morningside

        As vile as Nixon was, Trump is very much worse because he is stupid and ignorant.

      • onedollarjuana

        But if we get rid of Trump, we get Pence. A religious zealot. And much, much, more smrt than Twitler.

        • TheAmazingBeardedTrangerderist

          We already have Pence. He’s undoubtedly going to be the real President, like Cheney was with GWB.

        • C4TWOMAN

          I don’t buy that. IMHO Trump and Pence are a package deal. What? Is Pence going to pull a Bush senior and say he was “out of the room” when Trump was canoodling with the Russians? What kinda leadership is that?

          “Yeah I knew my running mate was up to treason and had conflicts of interest but no, I didn’t call him out. Why do you ask?”

          Right. For Pence to take the crown he’d have to PROVE he objected strongly and made significant efforts to push Trump to act ethically. We all know that didn’t happen. Another thing, Pence has like negative charisma and he’s not a “chessmaster”. Without Trump, he’s a nobody.

  • Flashman

    On a positive note, at least while Nixon was doing this he wasn’t trying to rat-fuck those Jew-boys at the SEC in the ass.

  • Flashman

    The Nixon bibliography since the late 70s has been sort of interesting. Every few years, somebody comes along and tries to rehability The Old Warrior by cherry picking annecdotes and quotes. Then a new tape or something like this comes out, full of fresh outrages. Conventional wisdom re-confirms Nixon as a horrid monster. Nixon-o-philes sulk. Time passes. Repeat.

    • Morningside

      I’m sure there is a lot more to come.

  • Makes that rat bastard son-of-a-bitch Nixon’s grave the ultimate in irony, dunnit? https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/e911ec01c4c7be5ad5f9130a2e59f96d0d56df1f2d53633a35c25b0c62d961e1.jpg

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Also, Tricky Dick’s name is engraved on a plaque on the fucking Moon, so if things keep going the way they have been, Richard M. Nixon’s name will last far, far longer than any other artifact of human existence.

      • JustDon’tSayDittos

        Sounds like we need another Giant Meteor.

      • YetAnotherRebecca

        If it makes you feel any better, so will a Golden Disc curated by Carl Sagan containing a message from Jimmy Carter (an underappreciated damn-near-saint-of-a-man who was himself taken out with a dirty Reagan trick involving the Iranian Hostage Crises), the sound of a mother kissing her child, laughter – and hell, even the seeds of modern rock music in Johnny B. Goode by Chuck Berry.

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Contents_of_the_Voyager_Golden_Record

        So some cool stuff might outlive us all too…

        • Scopedog

          Thanks for reminding us about this…hope those Voyagers keep going farther into the cosmos.

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Sorta OT: I dunno. There is a man in the neighborhood, a veteran of Vietnam and the 1st Cavalry Division (Airmobile), which I know because he always wears a hat, T-shirt, or both proclaiming this, but even though I greeted him in a friendly, respectful way, he has no desire to interact with a Gay Chick, even though I can speak intelligently about the combat operations of the Cav, plus the Golf Course, the Plantation, like that.

    There is only so much I can do, and most of the rest of the elderly folks are glad to see me, they know the Big Gay Girl is always friendly, polite, and helpful with doors and packages.

    I guess, mebbe the GOPervoters bring the shit on themselves? I dunno.

    • BeachBum

      Sounds like he has demons.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Perhaps. I’d still like to talk with him, at least a bit. Presumably he wears his Veteran of the Air Cav gear because he doesn’t want their service to be forgotten. I could show him that someone younger does know, and will remember, but I guess my anime hair and Pride jewelry are too great of a deterrent.

        • this makes me sad. but bless you for your spirit and effort.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            :)

            I mean, I am a big girl with anime hair, a lip piercing, and a Pride bracelet, and not especially modestly dressed. I probably am a little scary to elderly folks, so I make some effort to be friendly, and it’s mostly working. :)

          • wish i could meet you some time – you sound like my kind of people!

            cheers!

  • Randy Riddle

    Well, Trump won’t have to worry about future historians uncovering notes like this since I’m pretty sure that the people Trump surrounds himself with don’t have the ability to write anything but their signature on the back of a check.

    • SessileRaptor

      My bet for why he won’t have to worry about future historians is still on “No surviving humans.”

      • thixotropic jerk

        Things that make you go “BOOM!”

  • azeyote

    ” i’m not a crook ” they always say what they are – they can’t help themselves – unfortunately we know what trump is – he’s told us

  • MeerkatsRMammals

    I vividly remember when Nixon died in ’94. ALL the reporters were gooey over his death, like usual, discussing his “legacy”… This Meerkat was a mere twinkle in my parents eye when Nixon was in office, but I’d read enough history to know this reporting was stupid. And here we are today, 20 yrs after his death, thinking Watergate was his shitty legacy. Only to find out Nixon was an even bigger scumbag than we ever knew.

    • Rick Hill

      I was just thinking he proly resigned because Watergate was the least of the skeletons in his closet

      • MeerkatsRMammals

        That’s a very good possibility. Imagine how many more piles of dung they would’ve uncovered if they did a full investigation.

    • C4TWOMAN

      It was really depressing how willing they were to glide over his “legacy”, just because, well he’s dead now, lets not bring up that Watergate thing now. I was like, you’re joking right?

      • MeerkatsRMammals

        Yes! Exactly!!! Nixon’s entire legacy was Watergate! He should get credit for nothing else.

      • Scopedog

        They did the same thing to Reagan–remember the remark that Iran-Contra was a small “black mark” on an otherwise awesome Presidency?

        I bet you here and now that Carter and Clinton will get no such tongue baths when they shuffle off this mortal coil…

    • Raan

      His other legacy is that he was on Laugh-In. That, Watergate, and (at least according to Hunter S. Thompson) being a football fanatic.

    • theblackdog

      I remember my parents talking about how much of a dick Nixon was. Then later my mom was watching the broadcast of his funeral and we noticed that Reagan was spaced out, my mom kept on jokingly saying “WAKE UP!”

      Then a few months later Nancy revealed that Ronnie had Alzheimer’s and we felt kinda bad.

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    Oh, just fuck you NYT. While “it cannot be said definitively whether a peace deal could have been reached . . .,” it can be said definitively that any person who would deliberately try to fuck up peace talks — or even discuss doing so — is a world-class . . . no, a NYT-class asshole who is undeserving of even slight attempts to mitigate his assholery.

  • But, only Nixon could go to China! …Leading to lots of incredibly low-wage jobs what amount to slavery of the entire Chinese people, so, uh, yeah. Nixon had that reverse-Midas touch.

    • BeachBum

      Big Business GOP loves the Red Chinese Communists, cause $$$$. GOP politicians ran against the Communists to win elections. Now China is still our enemy not cause of communism and labor camps and human rights, but because we buy all their crap, they buy our debt, and our 401Ks are tied to big business in China and everywhere in the world.
      So now Trump is gonna straighten out China for us. And the world too I guess. This I gotta see. Oh did I mention China has nuclear weapons ?

      • Stulexington

        And all your debt, how exactly is he planning to go to war with the only people who will lend him enough money to go to war?

    • gene108

      Huh? China’s poverty rates have drastically dropped, since they started opening up their economy, in the 1980’s. Per capita income has also increased many times over.

      They’ve gone from a country struggling to feed its people to the second largest economy on the planet.

      I don’t know, if Nixon’s trip in 1973 actually had an impact on Chinese economic policy, following Mao’s death, but China has done well for itself economically over the last 40 years.

    • whitroth

      Yes, because the GOP would have crucified a Democrat who did with ANTICOMMONISM!!!

    • Scopedog

      And according some idiots on the far Left, Nixon was somehow to the left of Obama.

      …The mind reels…

  • Vecchiojohn

    “Those who fail to learn from history are American voters.”

    I am going to tell everyone I said that.

    • Vagenda and Tiara

      American voters are too stupid to remember what state Bush and his fellow travelers left the country in a whole eight years ago. Republicans should replace their symbol of the elephant to the symbol of an amnesia patient.

  • whitroth

    1. Nixon *was* fucking guilty of treason. Take away the
    federal guards, etc, from his tomb.
    2. Humphrey would have won. (Would have been a hell of a
    lot easier for him except for fucking Richard Daley, Sr.
    3. We’re talking about LBJ here: he could, and would, have
    told the South Vietnamese to make a deal, or he’d
    start pulling support *then*, not wait for a deal.

    And HW Bush was guilty of treason – the declassified KGB report of an agent in the room when he got the Iranians to hold the hostages until after the election, and arms for hostages.

    And Cheney was guilty of treason for outing Valerie Plame as CIA, with the probable death of the covert agents she was running.

    The GOP will happily commit treason, if it gets them power.

    • Scopedog

      The GOP will happily commit treason, if it gets them power.

      Yep. And the media will gleefully grease the skids for them, and the far Left will beat up on the Democrats while crying that both sides are the same.

  • Thaumaturgist

    Yes, Nixon did so have a secret plan to end the War in Vietnam. The secret plan was to end the war the week before his reelection, but the South Vietnamese government refused to go along, and the war lingered.

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    The fact that he was willing to let US soldiers die, in order to advance his career, is really all you need to know.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      And then Reagan did it again with the hostages and got a bunch of marines blown up.

      • Ducksworthy

        Yep. It appears treason is a winning strategy.

    • Vagenda and Tiara

      George W. Bush and Dick Cheney, also, too.

    • cmd resistor

      There really is nothing redeeming about these folks, is there.

  • I retract all statements about missing Nixon

    • Ducksworthy

      Next time you’re in DC feel free to place a post-it on the wall at about September 1968 saying “The following names brought to you by the Republican Party and its need to win at all costs.”

  • m rees

    It took nearly 50 years to find out what a dick Nixon really was. Give the HRC email investigations a little time!

    • Ducksworthy

      Yea. I figure in 8-10 thousand years the apes will get a real laugh about the Weiner pics.

    • Vagenda and Tiara

      Everyone who had a brain new Nixon was a dick back in the 1960s. I was a little kid raised by Republicans, and even I knew he was a dick. It’s kind of like how all the sane people in America know Trump is a narcissistic asshole and a thief, who is going to be a terrible president.

    • Morningside

      It was easy to know at the time. I was an adult already at the time.

  • Begin Anew Day

    Sometimes I have to remember this : donnie is certainly bad but he’s no NIXON!

    • Morningside

      He could be worse. Probably is.

      • i don’t think there’s any doubt he’s far far worse.

        • Notreelyhelping

          It depends. Which is worse? Evil clever or evil stupid?

      • Begin Anew Day

        NIXON broke America.

        Then he ran off and did not clean up the mess.

        Our useless press “rehabilitated” him when he croaked but I will always remember the man who broke America while I urinate on his headstone.

  • Ducksworthy

    Lyndon “This is treason Everett.” Everett “I know it. (sotto voce) But it wins elections.”

  • Last Hussar

    Back in the 01 a friend of mine blamed Nixon for the election of Reagan and Bush, because he taught Americans nor to trust a clever man

  • SayItWithWookies

    Time and more immediate scumbags sort of bumped Nixon down the list of people whose graves I wanted to pee on. This puts him almost ahead of Dick Cheney.

  • k9feline

    Hey don’t blame American voters for Trump. Most of them voted against him, and more of them voted for his main opponent over him.

    The main blame still belongs to the Electoral College.

    • Ducksworthy

      I blame slavery, and karma.

  • Celtic_Gnome

    The argument that we can’t know if Nixon’s involvement torpedoed Humphrey’s campaign or convinced the South Vietnamese to avoid the peace talks is bullshit. The actions Nixon took were illegal regardless of the outcome.

  • Keith Taylor

    Here I go with two crude blunt assertions that I think would still be hard to disprove. First, Nixon was a paranoid brutish crook. Second, Trump makes him look principled and classy.

  • GRH

    OkOkOk, so he prolonged the war 5 years – but, didn’t he go on “Laugh In” and say “sock-it-to-me”?
    Also too, tell the truth – who would you rather have a beer with – Nixon or LBJ?
    Nevermind

  • Notreelyhelping

    Arrrrrrrrggghhhhhhhaaaaaaa! But it’s okay! He went to China. Arrrrrrrrgggghghhhhhhhaaaaaaa!

Previous articleDonald Trump Saves Eight Congressional Ethics Jobs From Going To Mexico! (OR DOES HE?)
Next articleLib Trash Megyn Kelly Joining Lib Trash NBC News, Where Lib Trash Belongs