SHARE

2 turtle doves

Wells Fargo finds itself in some trouble after doing a lot of terrible things over recent years. There’s the widespread fraud used to rip off existing customers. And the CEO’s resignation. And more fraud. And the fraud preying on small businesses. And the fraud preying on veterans. And the post-fraud apology train wreck. And the post-apology attempt to prevent fraud victims from pursuing class action lawsuits. And finally *rubs eyes in disbelief* a criminal investigation with possible traction?? If a Corporate Person ever had reason to hit the bottle hard over the holidays, it’s Wells Fargo.

But Wells does have an Ace in the Hole. And it’s not the mandatory arbitration provisions in their consumer contracts. It’s the year’s most brilliant business person and soon to be part-time President, Donald. The glowing shiny man owes the troubled bank $410 million, or, to put it in terms Huckster-elect might understand, half a Copperfield. This debt is mostly in the form of mortgages on his dick-shaped skyscrapers. One such mortgage has a soon-to-be-due balloon payment.

Why does this matter? Even before discovery of the systematic, but TOTALLY unknown to executive team, fraud, Wells Fargo was on the government’s Naughty List.

Wells was the only U.S. bank to have their “living will” — a government-mandated roadmap for how to dismantle the firm in the event of a failure — rejected by federal regulators. This is the third time since 2014 Wells Fargo had its living will denied as not credible, and for the first time, that will lead to sanctions: The Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation and the Federal Reserve announced they will prohibit Wells Fargo from establishing any international subsidiaries or purchasing any nonbank companies.

Prohibit a bank consuming smaller companies and establishing offshore tax havens? Now that its once-thriving consumer fraud business is foiled, what the hell else is the bank going to do with its time??

Wells is facing a March 31st deadline to get their shit together. And if not enough people sign the change.org petition to appoint the Gilmore Girls co-presidents, Donald WhatsHisName will be our overlord. As OverlOrange, he’ll have the opportunity to do a lot of deck shuffling at the Federal Reserve, FDIC, and Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (RIP…?). It’s almost like someone could call this a conflict of interest. I don’t know. Maybe we should ask Wells Fargo board member and future Transportation Secretary Elaine Chao-McConnell.

College kids – Don’t give yourself a school-sanctioned debit card this season. That’s stupid and you’re in college!

You’re sauntering through the quad, breeze in your hair, head full of world-shaping ideas about how Buster Keaton’s films are totally relevant to a Jeff Sessions Justice Department. Then a smiling face at a foldout table beckons you to come hither, probably offering a t-shirt. And you love free shit! Who doesn’t? You can use that free t-shirt for warmth or to block the bottom of the dorm door for reefer purposes.

This uber-friendly shirt gifter is offering something else as well. A debit card that has an allegedly very limited downside. And as a college student, you might need a method of payment so why not get one with the University of Diminished State Funding’s mascot on it? School pride!

The Consumer Financial Protection Bureau analyzed more than 500 marketing agreements between colleges and banks that were filed with the federal Department of Education and found that cards issued under many contracts may lead students to pay excessive fees.

These cards may double as a student identification card or may appeal to student loyalty by displaying the school’s logo. But the marketing agreements often emphasize revenue for the school and the banks rather than the financial interests of students, the bureau found.

Debit cards have surpassed credit cards as the product of choice for campus marketing contracts, in part because of the 2009 Credit Card Accountability Responsibility and Disclosure Act, which restricts the marketing of credit cards to students. Last year, banks paid colleges and universities nearly $27 million for the right to pitch credit cards to students, down from $84 million in 2009, the bureau reported.

Well, when the next administration cuts the CFPB it will be open season for all kinds of cards. Debit, Credit, Organ Donor. All methods of payment will be on the table for indebted college kids. That is until Betsy DeVos eliminates all public colleges in favor of a healthy selection of Jesus Camps. In the meantime, maybe find a local credit union, youngsters.

$
Donate with CCDonate with CC
  • FauxAntocles

    But will Trump voters even recognize how much they fucked themselves over?

    • TJ Barke

      Any and all bad things that happen are democrat’s and or blah’s faults, QED!

      • Kiri the Resistant Unicorn

        Unless it’s a hurricane, which are due to god being angry at pride parades.

        • TJ Barke

          But why does he miss the pride parades by such a wide margin?

          • Unpresidented Ron

            And mess up those FABULOUS costumes?

          • TJ Barke

            So he hates gays, but values fabulous dress?

          • Kiri the Resistant Unicorn

            Drunken smiting.

    • BMW

      Does that question answer itself? Its not as if critical thinking skills aren’t a widespread trait with the Trump diehards.

    • Blender_415

      According to statistics, Trump voters don’t go to college so they’re safe from predatory campus-based debt peddlers.

      • Vecchiojohn

        Who needs credit cards when there are payday loans?

        • Celtic_Gnome

          Payday loans are so last year. The cool kids are all getting car title loans.

      • Spurning Beer

        Sure, but put a college or pro football logo on the card, and the poorly educated will pay an annual fee for the card, too.

        • Unpresidented Ron

          Gotta admit, those guys (and the NASCAR people) are geniuses. They’ve figured out a way of advertising their product and making the consumer pay THEM to do it. Brilliant!

          • BackDoorMan

            … I remember when ‘logo-wear’ first started flooding the marketplace and my response was, and remains, “I’ll wear this when they pay me to act as a mobile billboard.” Needless to say, I don’t have any name brand clothing and the stuff I have, well, when I remember to wear it, works just fine.

          • Unpresidented Ron

            This is a coded message that says you don’t wear pants either, isn’t it?

          • BackDoorMan

            … too subtle? Pants are “overrated” you know.

    • therblig

      nope. they’ll spend the rest of their miserable lives thinking that if only trump had run against the black guy 8 years ago, they’d be living on easy street.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      At best, they will say, “I blame the Democrats for not convincing me to vote against him.”

    • onedollarjuana

      no

  • TJ Barke
    • TX Dept. of Brad Relations

      Is that you pre or post 75 lb. weight loss?
      Give us an updated one

      • TJ Barke

        That was as of the 19th.

        • TX Dept. of Brad Relations

          Rock star! Keep it up.

  • BMW

    Oh the Wells Fargo Wagon is a-coming down the street…

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Pennsylvania Avenue being the street in question. :-(

  • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

    Why so worried? Trump said he was going to get Wall Street out of the government.

    • TJ Barke

      Call it a hunch, but I think he might have been lying…

      • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

        He would never do that to the uneducated! He loves the uneducated.

        • georgiaburning

          Served well done and paired with a nice wine

          • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

            With truffle sauce.

          • Celtic_Gnome

            That leaves out Trump Wine.

        • BackDoorMan

          … not to be that guy, but The Vulgar Yam actually said “I love the poorly educated!”… meaning of course that an uneducated person can learn, but the poorly educated are graduates of Trump University. So, you know which ones he loves…

      • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

        There have been some subtle cues that might be the case. I can’t quite put my finger on it…

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        No! Orange Julius Caesar is incapable of fabrication, mendacity or confabulation of any kind. Just ask him!

        • BackDoorMan

          … but don’t ask him to spell “fabrication, mendacity or confabulation”… one syllable good, more than that… sad!

    • Unpresidented Ron

      Perhaps he’s dyslexic. He does seem interested in getting the government out of Wall Street.

  • Bill D. Burger

    Hells Cargo: The only bank with a getaway vehicle as its logo.

    http://www.kappit.com/img/pics/201601_2354_cchic.jpg

  • Bill D. Burger
    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      So you’re saying, it’s not the “vig”, it’s the collection policies?

      • Jenniferkjurgens

        Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !sq192c:
        On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
        !sq192c:
        ➽➽
        ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash472ShopDashGetPay$97Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★::::::!sq192c:….,……

      • Danielledtimmer

        Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !sf133c:
        On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
        !sf133c:
        ➽➽
        ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash423TopKeyGetPay$97Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★::::::!sf133c:….,……..

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Don’t fall for it. They use Time Machines to send your Mortgage back into the past. You’ll owe millions!

  • memzilla Ω

    Simple solution: Drumpf gets Wells Fargo to lend Carl Icahn the money so he can take over the bank and personally supervise the thievery the reform. Wells Fargo collapses from the debt load, and in a completely Drumpfian display of equality, the bondholders, shareholders, and customers all get screwed.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    But the marketing agreements often emphasize revenue for the school and the banks rather than the financial interests of students, the bureau found.

    “Hey, the kids may as well learn now that everyone’s out to get what they can!”

    – College fundraisers administrators, probably

  • HellhathnofuryDemme

    Happy holidays to all the trolls lurking out there.
    (I don’t celebrate Christmas, but I want to include you in my holiday greetings.)

    Now, stop reading the Wonkettes and get back to your families!

    • Jonny On Maui

      But the Wonkettes is my family… :-)

      • ahughes798

        Awwwww!

    • Yr. Gma

      Where’s that twee French one?

    • Unpresidented Ron

      What, and leave the basement?

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
  • Rouge Skwerl!

    As a member of the University of Minnesota administration I find this talk of banks preying on students with t-shirts to be preposterous! Simply preposterous! And I challenge any of our students to sign up and get a free sweatshirt!

    https://tcfbank.com/Personal/UMN-Student-Checking

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/f97b06ed44c3efb65885d8ead6e40d837a2a4915fbb34f4cb600a33785516bd9.jpg

    • TJ Barke

      Dig the antifascist avatar.

  • SayItWithWookies

    Oh pity those poor big banks who are so beset by regulations that they have to prey on the poor and middle class just to eke out a living. It’s like everyone thinks Italian marble conference tables pay for themselves.

  • Daisy

    I’m actually required to use my college debit card; I keep $20 on it so I can pay to print.

    • TX Dept. of Brad Relations

      good on ya!
      we have separate print cards, which is dumb cause the next building over lets you print for free.

      College…where smart and dumb collide.

  • Shibusa

    I used to work for Wells Fargo, but I lost interest

  • Jonny On Maui

    How soon before debt becomes inherited? I’m going to go out with a bang and the spawn will be in for a shock…

    • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

      If debt were inherited, Donnie’s spawn might be fuuuucked…

    • Bill D. Burger

      “Being of sound mind and body, I hereby state that I spent it all before I died. ___ Good luck! XOXOXOXO”

    • data_ninja

      After moon lord shitstain Newt Gingrich helped make sure that student loans were very hard to get rid of when declaring bankruptcy, they probably can’t wait for generations to build up and pay the debt. I swear, feudalism is gonna make a huge comeback, and half of these people want to be serfs.

  • Beowoof14

    Merry Christmas Wells Fargo and other Wall Street and Big Bank fraudsters. Our new leader Gropenfurher sees an opportunity to get out of debt and fuck the public at the same time. And with Gropenfurher being a big fraudster public fucker himself, knows your pain and will provide relief for the mere cost of relieving him of his debt burden. And the bonus to you will be you can get back to stealing from the public and it will be all legal like.

  • Bub the Hoohah! loving Zombie

    I sometimes find myself wondering if Trump didn’t see his entire financial house of cards collapsing in the not too distant future, and decided to take a Hail Mary shot at the presidency as his last, desperate attempt to stave it off. Probably bullshit, I know. But sometimes I wonder…

    • Kiri the Resistant Unicorn

      I think that’s a reasonable hypothesis that could exist alongside the Revenge For Everyone Laughing At Him scenario. Huge disasters usually have multiple causes.

      • OneYieldRegular

        This is a man so boring, so banal, that his only concern has been mere money, and I suspect that his only concern as President will be the financial benefits it will bring him.

        • FukuiSanYesOta

          A gilt Franz Stangl.

    • OneYieldRegular

      Regardless, he’s now in a position to manipulate all of his creditors in order to maximize the advantages accruing to him.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      I think he wants revenge and adulation myself. Which is why I plan to give him none of the latter but plenty of opportunities for the former, going forward.

    • Lefty Wright

      Whether it was intended to avert a collapse of his empire or not, it was surely meant to line his pockets. His problem is that because he thinks he knows everything and thus far has had a teflon suit, he actually knows very little outside of managing hotels and resorts and that teflon does wear out eventually and the shit starts sticking.

    • Unpresidented Ron

      You’re hardly the first to consider tis, and as time goes by it’s been looking more and more reasonable an excuse, though the desire to revenge himself on anyone who doesn’t felch him in public HAS to be a part of it as well.

    • onedollarjuana

      Actually, the pension is pretty good. About $200k/annum plus about $100k office expenses, free franking for life, and I assume, free health care.

      Unless, of course, he is impeached, convicted, and removed from office. Then bupkis.

  • RobKanC

    Imagine the tea partiers freakin out when they see how much the big banks are gonna get bloated and how much government funds go to them. They will finally realize they are rooting for the wrong party. But not to worry, Fox News will reprogram them by pointing out both parties are essentially the same and as a side effect some libtards will buy it and vote with their conscience ensuring the cons win again. I call this the liberal cycle of depression. Look at how the cons voted for Trump just for the Supreme Court cos they may live in medieval times but they are not stupid.

    • shivaskeeper

      If they didn’t get it during the mortgage meltdown and subsequent to big to fail bailout, they won’t get it now. Some of the GOPers will come around, but there are plenty of them who will stick with the party of hate and fear because they are hateful and fearful little people.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      They will NEVER realize this, because they always put their tribe (white fundigelical assholes) ahead of their own self interest. They deserve to be enserfed. They hate the blahs and the liberals and the educated more than they love their own children…and VERY MUCH MORE than they love their guns.

  • dshwa

    Our failure to blow up the banks and jail the leadership after 2008 will go down as one of the worst decisions the country ever made.

    • phoenix00

      Obama probably thought the alternative would have been worse, especially with the economic malaise going on at the time…

      Regardless, it’s definitely one of those “hindsight is 20/20” kind of arguments.

  • TX Dept. of Brad Relations

    College kids – Don’t give yourself a school-sanctioned debit card this season. That’s stupid and you’re in college!

    In college the first time around at Univ of Tex. there was just table after table of these companies…except they were getting kids hooked on credit cards.

    Hell, even in community college, my student ID can be used as a debit card, if I sign up with…oh look, Wells Fargo!

    • OneYieldRegular

      They’re really the same people who are pushing soda and candy vending machines on elementary school campuses.

    • data_ninja

      Usually the reason you see so much of that is because the credit card companies get students to sell to other students, and claim to pay them X amount of dollars for people signed up. Except at my school, they not only screwed over the students signing up for the cards (because usually it was their first credit card, and it’s sold to them as free money), but the companies also screwed over the people pushing the card applications to the students. The invisible hand of the free market strikes again!

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “Despite our name, and all the evil, we are not a North Dakota Oil Company.”
    — Wells Fargo

    • OneYieldRegular

      Ah, but they support one. Bigly.

  • Suttree

    Thanks for the happy nice time Wonkette! I was expecting an open thread with cat pictures. :P

  • Suttree

    Ok, on topic, I have never had a credit card and always get turned down on applications. I do not understand this whole credit thing, beyond what my favorite bar in New Orleans gave me.

    • TX Dept. of Brad Relations

      Smart man.

    • That’s why you don’t get one. I ran into the same thing early this year, when my local bank was shilling their card, and I thought “Well, just for emergencies.” I got turned down, because … I have no credit record. The last time I had a credit card was some 16 years ago, and I haven’t had one since I got rid of it. I also haven’t had any loans in that time, so according to the credit bureaus, I don’t exist.

      • Unpresidented Ron

        <looks around> Who said that?

      • Suttree

        Yup. I am either invisible or a credit risk because of hospital bills.

        • major_asshole

          For me, it’s student loans. But on the other hand, no credit cards! Yay!

      • mfp

        turned down for credit cards norbrook and suttree?…consider it a xmas miracle, be thankful, and run with it

        • I really don’t want one, but late last year I had a major breakdown with my car, which got very expensive. I had the money to cover it, but it was one of those incidents that made me go “hmm… what if I hadn’t had enough in my account at the time?” I learned my lesson a long time ago about cards, but having an “emergency account” was on my radar. Oh well. :-)

          • mfp

            yes, a cc is handy for emergencies, no doubt…i hope you can get one with a decent interest rate, in the low-mid teens% is about as good as i can manage…if you do get one, i’ll pass along what my coworker, who’s practical problem solving skills are beyond mine, told me she does with hers (when i was whinging to her about how i need to get my card debt down)

            “you take that damn card and put it in a ziploc bag of water and put it in the freezer, and if you still wanna use it by the time it thaws out, at least ya had time to think about it”

            which kinda defeats the ’emergency use’ aspect, but i’m taking it under advisement

      • efoveks

        Me too. I own everything I need outright, pay all my bills on time or ahead, don’t bounce checks or take out loans. Ergo, I do not exist.

  • TX Dept. of Brad Relations

    Are we posting OT news stories today, or is there a moratorium on depressing/infuriating news links?

    • Suttree

      I’m going to start posting off topic right now. I just woke up and started drinking. I think that our present from The One True God Our Trix will allow it.

      • The Witch of Endor

        Maybe we designate the cocktail article the Nice Time thread?

        • Suttree

          Shall we? IDK There are rules now! *goes back to the fridge*

          • The Witch of Endor

            No Kielbasa w/mustard and onions for you!

          • Suttree

            Ok, you put a non-comment up saying that we are going to the other thread, and then we can go play there. Tag, you’re it!

          • Suttree

            No need, new post up! yay! It’s an x-mas miracle!

          • The Witch of Endor

            Early posting of deleted comments. THEN back to the booze thread!

          • Suttree

            And they all rejoiced!

          • Celtic_Gnome

            That sounds delicious.

        • Incoming Ham

          Or a new one: “What I’m Drinking Now.”

          • major_asshole

            I’m personally finishing up a sixer of this stuff called “Not Your Daddy’s Ginger Ale,” and although the taste isn’t the best I’ve ever had…it isn’t bad by any measure.

            It was a gift, ok? Alone with lots of cheddar popcorn and a new mouse for my laptop.

          • Incoming Ham

            It sounds like you have the party under control Major. It definitely sounds like you are having a better time than those of us dealing with bigoted inlaws and dry turkey. New mouse sounds a lot more appetizing.

    • Jonny On Maui

      I’d like to say, “Whatever floats your boat.” But I don’t run the place…

  • Suttree

    I have a babby x-mas tree. I’m still trying to find a red nose for my moose.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ff1432f0280dc29c10c56a674b73f28d3fde921fd6bb3b70a26350d1256f9469.jpg

  • OneYieldRegular

    The Wells Fargo branch at my university offers free lollipops to students when they open an account, if that tells you anything about the kind of people running the place, and it does.

    • Unpresidented Ron

      Is the branch located in a van down by the river?

      • TJ Barke

        Chris Farley libel?

    • snark-lurker

      tells us a little something bout stoodent body too mebbe?

    • phoenix00

      An account? Singular?

  • Villago Delenda Est

    These people are all criminals. They should be dealt with accordingly.

    • Unpresidented Ron

      Today that means being given positions of power and influence in DC.

      • FukuiSanYesOta

        The idea of Rick dogfucking Perry being in charge of nuclear weapons research and the Z Machine makes me want to kick things. Him, preferably.

        • Incoming Ham

          There are a million Texans who have wanted to do that for 14+ years.

  • in part because of the 2009 Credit Card Accountability Responsibility and Disclosure Act

    Say the banks: Regulations making us not cheat people? PFFFTTT we’ll just market something else then!

    • Courser

      I had a couple of those Higher One debit cards when I was in grad school and you didn’t really have a choice in the matter. You *could* opt to get your financial aid in a check, but it took days and weeks longer between the postal service and bank holds. Oh! And you can *only* withdraw the money at a machine on campus. Which, if you’re going to college online, means you have to find a community college with an ATM machine. And go there. Pay to park (because what school *doesn’t* have only pay parking near their student unions?). Find your way to the ATM, usually near the cafeteria. A giant PITA.

      If you use it like a normal bank debit card, you’ll get hammered by fees because you only get a few transactions a month for fee.

      • major_asshole

        Oh god please no don’t make me wistful for the days of getting my refund in the form of a paper check from the cashier’s office.

        My first two semesters as an undergrad (Fall ’05 and Spring ’06), my refunds were printed, signed by the bursar, and ready for pickup by the second week of class. Then I just had to walk five minutes to my bank and have them cash and deposit the check (because, for whatever reason, depositing it meant I had to wait for it to show up in my account). When I got a job on campus, I opted for direct deposit of all my checks from the university–which cut the waiting period down to practically nothing.

        Fun tidbit: My last semester as an undergrad, my refund check was in my bank account three days before classes started.

  • Cogswell – Bah! Humbug!

    That prick is only a billionaire on paper. Call in his debt and he’s a pauper.

    • Funny story: he is prolly not even a billionaire on paper neither XD

      • clairence

        depends on how he’s feeling that day.

      • MeerkatsRMammals

        He’s only a bazillionaire in his big, smart brains

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      This is why he can’t divest.

  • onedollarjuana

    Just like Trump’s University lawsuit, I expect this Wells Fargo thing to blow over some time shortly after Jan. 20.

    • ResistanceFighterCaptainHowdy

      I was just thinking, wasn’t there something about Melania being a illegal? Guess not . . .

    • MeerkatsRMammals

      Considering his “Transportation Secretary” is Mitch McTurtle’s wife & a former Wells Fargo employee? I’m not a gambler (like Kenny Rogers), but I’d be willing to bet a large amount of money that you’re spot on – this whole thing will disappear.

  • FukuiSanYesOta

    I’m so tired of hearing about this absurd assclown, and he’s not even sworn in yet.

    Not sure if I can take four years of this nonsense.

    • MeerkatsRMammals

      Ear plugs & horse blinders for everyone!

  • Alan

    So when do the grownups decide this has gone far enough and this guy can’t really take office. When I was a kid I didn’t agree with most republican positions but everyone agreed they were mostly interested in the public good, just had different ideas. Now it’s just become a horrible joke. Haha, we won, nanananana. When did it become a competition?

    • FukuiSanYesOta

      Reagan was such a fucking dimwit that the CIA would make films for him before major diplomatic visits simply because it was the only damn way he’d take it in.

      Trump is dumber than that. It hurts my brain.

      • Alan

        Yep, Reagan was the beginning of it all. We actually used to play a drinking game (back when I did such things). We called it Alzheimer’s and had to drink every time he had a lapse. That was in his first term and then, to everyone’s horror, he was re-elected. Sigh.

        • MeerkatsRMammals

          So…just how drunk were you by the end of the 80’s?

          • Alan

            Fortunately I quit drinking before he left office. Come to think of it, maybe I have him to thank.

  • Reality Kills

    Donald is going to be the worst president ever. GWB and Reagan are going to look like awesome presidents.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      In all fairness, St. Ronnie was an awesome President. It’s just that he used his power completely for evil.

  • Bill Slider

    Matthew, the first book in the New Testament. Carpenter, the trade which Jesus practiced. Has anyone else considered our Wonkette scribe might be a wannabe Jesus porn star? Happy Festivus. I see you as the Special Projects person for Representative Editrix. You know, the one who specializes in Minor Miracles.

  • Mark Leitch

    Maybe, just maybe, for a day, we can all put our differences aside, enjoy family and friends, and have a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all.

    • major_asshole

      Oh please. Some of us have to deal with family who happily voted for Trump because he’s “a good guy who knows business and will make us the best nation on Earth again.”

      The only part of Christmas that makes up for that? The hundred bucks in my stocking.

      • mfp

        i successfully pissed off that faction of my family within 2days post election, and not only did i find out who was who, but i’m sure i wont see or hear from them anytime in the near future, and i saved myself some $$…but ya know what?…i’m old and cranky enough that i dont need that BS and nonsense, and although i’ll miss a couple of them, i’ve spared myself a lot of frustration and aggravation for the next few years

        • MeerkatsRMammals

          I too am cranky & have cut people out of my life. Not because they supported Trump, but that’s besides the point. The point is…you’ll start to realize how much less cranky you can be when you don’t have to deal with constant BS from family members. Use the $$$ you saved on gifts & treat yo’ self to something nice! You deserve it :) Happy Holidays!

          • mfp

            yes, am less cranky, and will be taking your advice as to major_asshole with my extra $$ aaaahahahahaaaaaaa

            L&D, my friend, L&D……hh!

      • Mark Leitch

        Sad to say, but have family members who are Trumpers too. Am probably as angry at myself as anyone, for I must have been wearing rose tinted glasses not to see the amount of fear, anger, bigotry, and outright hate simmering below the surface in so much of the nation. I sort of was mistaken into thinking things were pretty good-unemployment was as an all time low- 4.8%, gas was around $2 a gallon,, the stock market (at the election time hovering around 18,000) had recovered from the 2008 disaster, and lending rates were making affordable to borrow for a house. But I guess if certain outlets of the Media continually shouts how bad things are, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, folks come to believe it.
        But at least, for today, lets try to appreciate the festivities, enjoy family and friends, and be positive about tomorrow.

        • MeerkatsRMammals

          “the broad masses of a nation are always more easily corrupted in the deeper strata of their emotional nature than consciously or voluntarily; and thus in the primitive simplicity of their minds they more readily fall victims to the big lie than the small lie, since they themselves often tell small lies in little matters but would be ashamed to resort to large-scale falsehoods.” – Adolph Hitler

          Who knew Faux News, Breitbart, Info Wars (& the like) would use “Mein Kampf” for their own propaganda?

          • Mark Leitch

            A good friend of mine is in her 80’s, was a child in the 1930’s in Germany, for months she has almost cried at times over the similarities she sees today, with what she was living thru then. When in college and studying in depth WWII and the Sociology in Germany leading up to the War, never thought would live to be witness to history repeating itself in so many ways- and in our own country.

      • MeerkatsRMammals

        Liquor & drugs, my friend…lots of liquor & drugs… Good luck surviving your family ;)

    • Jeffery Campbell

      Drinking and Zoloft required. Your results may vary. Happiest of holidays wonkaroos!

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Everything is terrible. Merry FuckYoumas

  • Celtic_Gnome

    And people wondered why the stock market soared after the election.

    • gene108

      The soaring stock market still goes on Obama’s score sheet. He’s still President. Stock market value increased by 250% or so under his watch.

      I do not think Trump could come close to topping that.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      because his billionaire hedge fund manager supporters didn’t want the electors to stampede, so they poured money in?

  • anon_the_great

    Perhaps time to take a tactic from Jesus and drive the money changers out of the temple.

  • CATMAN

    We gotta get rid of the CFPB and that nasty fiduciary rule so that financial institutions can fatten their bottom line by screwing their customers–It’s the American Way, dammit, where parasitism by the financial industry made our country great and highly unequal

  • herrointment

    Chuckwagon…..

  • xy

    who could have guessed that banks would fuck over everyone at every opportunity?

    besides anyone that’s ever dealt with a bank i mean.

    • pgjack

      Banks are in the money vacuuming business. Sucking money out of every nook and cranny of the economy is there business. Motto: What’s yours is theirs.

      • Bongstar420

        Many have stock tickers…we can skim it back

  • ResistanceFighterCaptainHowdy

    Fuck à l’orange.

  • azeyote

    well they sure evolved since they sold bogus mortgage bundles from selling homes to unqualified buyers who – surprise – got foreclosed – now it’s bogus accounts, and cards that keep you in debt – what’s next – canned air

  • Carpe Vagenda

    The kid has been trying to get rid of one of those cards for literally years, but they’ve repeatedly not closed it when requested and then charged her for not paying fees. I can’t imagine how bad it is for people who actually use them.

    • TundraGrifter

      Your daughter should complain to the The Office of the Comptroller of the Currency (OCC), with a copy to the regulator in the state in which she lives.

      It will create a hassle Wells must deal with.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        This one isn’t actually Wells, but they are acting with her (state) school.

        • TundraGrifter

          File a complaint with the regulators. I can promise you it will cost them thousands of dollars to deal with it – and a great deal more if they don’t.

          • Bongstar420

            Not if trumpski fixes the problem..that pesky college student needs to pay up!

  • Keith Taylor

    Nobody could have believed this even ten years ago. The level of corruption, yes, that was believable, and the stupidity too. But nobody could have believed it would be right out in the open, announced, blatant, lawless, and “What’re you going to do about it, suckers?”

    • Bongstar420

      I’m gonna vote for a fat cat to clean it up! He will legalize their conduct. Mess cleaned
      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/942bd6bb7ed3f0f4568ed45f5b0ff326e78b988f399cbd123ef58f79dc7381b4.jpg

      • Blackest Noobs

        If you really believe that, then you truly are a dupe, Man-Tits.

        • Bongstar420

          Its a mistake to not recognize the satire and irony…

          But think about it…after the recoil; the progress.

          Maybe we get public banking in 10 years- fingers crossed

          • Blackest Noobs

            actually i do…i meant my comment for all the Man-Tits out there who did vote for Trump and think as you wrote…and believe you me they likely have MAN BOOBS.

  • Danielledtimmer

    Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !sf134c:
    On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
    !sf134c:
    ➽➽
    ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash424MarketKeyGetPay$97Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★::::::!sf134c:….,….

  • calliecallie

    I’m starting to feel like if tit for tat grifting is the worst this administration does, I could maybe learn to live with that. Just don’t blow up the planet, dude.

Previous articleYour Weekly Top Ten Says Happy War On Christmas Eve!
Next articleDeleted Comments: ‘Merry Christmas,’ You Pathetic Losers!