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preibus-hack-attack

Morning Wonkers! Are you ready for a fun-filled week of ‘splainering, forehead slapping, and snarky nice times? GOOD, because here’s some of the things we may be talking about today!

  • Even though the CIA says that Donald Trump received help from Russia to win the election, the FBI thinks that is just poppycock and that the Rooskies were trying to do way more than just get Trump elected.
  • Don’t tell Donald Trump what he knows and doesn’t know because he won’t believe the things he doesn’t know, so they must not be true! Donald Trump skips his intel briefings because “[he’s], like, a smart person,” who doesn’t need to be bothered with facts, and data, and troops positions, etc. etc.
  • Meanwhile, Trumpkins have gone out of their gourd upon being accused of what could potentially amount to treason with Reince Preibus saying that the RNC wasn’t hacked because you never saw hacked RNC documents, while Kellyanne Conway blathers about how the FBI and the CIA don’t have a “consensus view,” so it’s clearly false information and the politicization of our intelligence agencies.
  • A crazy person with horribly groomed facial hair that once served as the U.S. Ambassador to the U.N., John Bolton, thinks the DNC hack was a false flag operation, despite a mountain of evidence to the contrary, and that President Obama was responsible. This would mean Bamz hacked into his own party’s computers and released DNC documents and John Podesta’s emails, and ultimately threw the election of Hillary Clinton.
  • ExxonMobil CEO Rex Tillerson is reportedly going to be named as secretary of State because he has a history of making bigly cash deals with dictators for oil, like Putin, who once named him one of Russia’s bestest friends ever in the history of world.
  • Rick Perry is being considered to head the Department of Energy where he’ll probably lay himself off (if he can remember how to find it). Oops!
  • Boeing announced a $16.6 billion plan to sell planes to Iran, which might make tens of thousands U.S. manufacturing jobs if Congress creeps, Donald Trump, or Airbus don’t kill the whole thing.
  • Democrats caved over a government shutdown to pass a budget and get healthcare for coal miners until April when Republicans will just kick the debt-filled can of sadness down the road once again.
  • In response to Trump violating the U.S.’s “One-China” policy to shoot the shit with the President of Taiwan, China has flown a Xian H-6 nuclear payload capable bomber over the “nine-dash” demarcation line,” but they were probably just having some fun and letting their nuclear payloads out to get a little air. No big deal!
  • In case you missed it, Mike Pence wants to block the contents of an email about Indiana’s shenanigans during Obama’s attempt at immigration reform two years ago since it’s totally not your business to see what the government might have done, has done, or could do. Shut up, John Q. Public! [h/t]
  • According to the Social Security Administration’s inspector general, Social Security lines are getting longer while services are getting smaller, but most of you commie olds already knew your handouts weren’t greasing your palms like they used to, didn’t you?
  • When there’s an article in Teen Vogue that explains gaslighting, and accuses the president-elect of lying in depth, you’ve simultaneously reached a high point in modern journalism, and a new cultural low in historical depravity throughout all human history.
  • Obama played putt-putt with Bill Murray in the Oval Office in an effort to con people into signing up for healthcare because he’s a lazy commie who hates America, and wants to drive the country into a hole, bigly. Believe it.
  • The Obamas have sent out their final holiday card, and it doesn’t even say Merry Christmas! IMPEACH!
  • And here’s your morning Nice Time, a cheetah cub and a puppy! Take a deep breath as the cute dial is turned up to 11!

    $
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    • Nounverb911
      • Martini Ambassador

        Can you imagine the flashing strands of Christmas lighting clashing and reflected in that gawdawful gold mirrored space? Merry Christmas, seizures for everyone!

      • BigBoppa pour la résistance

        Because Xmas decorations might look gaudy?

      • Msgr_Moment

        Needs a fishtank.

    • beingreleased

      My current first question to Trump: Do you plan to ignore all intelligence findings, or just the ones that make you sad?

      • Nounverb911

        AOT,K.

      • SuspectedDemocrat

        Trying to keep up with all those names and places makes him feel sad and dumb. He prefers feeling smart.

      • Tallmutha

        He prefers stupidity findings.

      • phoenix00

        Just the ones that make him think. Or read. Or listen.

        He wants briefings he can tweet. And sometimes call into Fox News.

    • SuspectedDemocrat

      Psssst… hey Trump. Airbus here. You won’t believe the mean things I heard Boeing say about you… really unfair!

      • Nounverb911

        “Airbus’s plane’s wings are made of Brie”
        –Boeing

      • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

        We’d just like to remind you we still exist.

        – Bombardier

      • phoenix00

        You must say that with a Pan-European collective socialist accent.

    • Sedagive
    • Nounverb911

      Be afraid, be very afraid. He’s back and somewhere in Dump Tower.

      https://twitter.com/HowardMortman/status/808311958034350080

      • cmd

        Shit.

      • Msgr_Moment

        If somebody could please nuke the first Cabinet meeting, with votes, obvs. The War of 1812 taught us nothing if not that the building can always be rebuilt.

    • Nounverb911

      “Daddy, daddy, thanks for the stock tweet, we sold short and can now afford that new house in DC”.
      –Ivanka

      https://twitter.com/CNBCnow/status/808305972708069376

      • PubOption

        The Don has gone after Boeing and Lockheed Martin and meddled with United Technologies, my guess is that it’s time to short General Dynamics.

        • phoenix00

          Northrop’s also angling for some exposure, I hear.

      • Whale Chowder

        In true stopped clock fashion, he’s not wrong in this case…

    • SuspectedDemocrat

      Trump got on the twitters this morning to inform us that it’s impossible to know who did the hacking, so we should probably stop trying to find out.

      • cmd

        Well, then.

      • SmokinGood

        Revenge of Known Unknown Knowns.

        Fuck that word looks weird after typing it out half a dozen times….

      • phoenix00

        But we should still hire that “special prosecutor” to lock up Hillary.

    • dslindc

      You know who is an actual smart person, Donald? President Obama, and he gets his intelligence briefings because THAT IS HOW PRESIDENTING WORKS, YOU IGNORANT ASSHAT!

      • phoenix00

        Another reason I don’t think deadbeat pussy-grabber-in-chief is especially interested in actual Presidenting, just wants to strut around looking good and bragging about the “deals” he “makes”.

    • Vincent Ricola

      “Insist on fact-checking every Trump statement you read, every headline you share or even relay to a friend over coffee. If you find factual inaccuracies in an article, send an email to the editor, and explain how
      things should have been clearer. Inform yourself what outlets are trustworthy and which aren’t. If you need extra help, seek out a browser extension that flags misleading sites or print out a list of fake outlets, such as the one by communications professor Melissa Zimdars, and tape it to your laptop. Do a thorough search before believing the
      agenda Trump distributes on Twitter. Refuse to accept information simply because it is fed to you, and don’t be afraid to ask questions. That is now the base level of what is required of all Americans. If facts become a point of debate, the very definition of freedom will be
      called into question.”

      Thank you, Lauren Duca and teen Vogue, for educating the youth on trickery. You do journalism 99% better than cable news.

      • nightmoth

        Apparently the editors actually CARE about the future we’re giving our children, unlike almost every politician who SAYS they care.

      • cmd

        I remember in the good old days when we had to do exercises in English class on distinguishing fact from opinion.

        • Pissed de Résistance

          The Air Force used to have curriculum on propaganda, and how to spot it and how to defend against it. I imagine that’s a thing of the past.

        • resistance_fighter_rosenbomb

          A few times a month I work at my local Boys & Girls Club, and back in October I was helping out in the art room when I heard two girls having a conversation about the spelling of the word ‘Halloween.’ When the incorrect spelling on one girl’s paper was pointed out, she simply said, “well, that’s my opinion of how to spell it.” I jumped in and shut that down as quickly as possible.

    • dslindc

      Imagine the outrage and hearings if Russia had helped Hillary win. But helping the Orange Shitgibbon? Nah, nothing to see here. Move along.

      • SuspectedDemocrat

        Imagine the angry Trump fans with assault rifles listening to Alex Jones podcasts.

      • Martini Ambassador

        Regardless of your political leanings, why would you not be VERY concerned about the possibility of foreign tampering? But nah, not most of the GOP. The irony is that they call themselves the real “patriots” of the country.

        • MynameisBlarney

          It’s not fascism when THEY do it.

        • SuspectedDemocrat

          Really, now is not the time for any responsible adult to say, “Shhhh… we won, don’t rock the boat.”

        • coozledad

          It’s like the British said of Republicans during the War of 1812- Swaggering douches who will do anything for money, designed by nature for slaves.

      • phoenix00

        IOKIYAR

    • MynameisBlarney

      Fucking repubs and the stupid fucking assholes that vote for them are going to destroy this nation.

    • Nounverb911

      Sarah Palin promised to keep an eye on Putin for donnie….

      https://twitter.com/SarahPalinUSA/status/808101702658363393

      • dslindc
      • Me The People

        She just made one of the dumbest things she ever said 100 times dumber.

        • calliecallie

          I don’t think she actually even said it. I think it was Tina Fey! For a joke! Palin just bought into it. LOL.

          • SuspectedDemocrat

            When asked in an interview, Sarah said one of her biggest annoyances was that everyone thought she said that when it was really Tina Fey. My response is, Al Gore didn’t say he invented the Internet either, so suck it up, public figure buttercup!

            • PubOption

              If I remember correctly, Sister Sarah said that she could see Russia from her state, Fey just changed the quote a little.

      • Martini Ambassador

        That’s parody, right? RIGHT?!!

        God, she’s a dumb bunny.

      • SuspectedDemocrat

        She always did have a sense of humor. Not great at making jokes, but still.

      • The Librarian

        How will she have time to keep watch with all her drunkenness and grifting?

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      This whole deal with Trump’s love of conspiracy theories, propaganda, and fake news coupled with throwing our intelligence apparatus under the bus is absolutely fucking terrifying. A daily national security briefing from Alex Jones? Chew on that for a sec. We are so fucked.

      • Sedagive

        Combine that with a slavish cult of personality and we’re fucked exponentially, ad infinitum.

    • beingreleased

      Here’s an actual happy story:
      Best Buy Employees Surprise Teen Who Visited Store Every Day To Play Smash Bros.
      http://kotaku.com/best-buy-employees-surprise-teen-who-visited-store-ever-1789981182

      • Vincent Ricola

        Never read the comments :(

        • puredog

          My rule of thumb is the only place it is safe to read the comments is where they are not allowed.

    • MynameisBlarney

      Had a dream last night that trump and every last one of his crooked lackeys were arrested for treason.
      And the world breathed a collective sigh of relief, then partied.

    • ThirdAmendmentMan

      Why would Trump read daily intelligence briefings when he can just read Breitbart and Russian Times whenever he needs?

      • SuspectedDemocrat

        There may be computer viruses on RT but that’s okay, he has a ten year old son who’s real good at cybersecurity.

      • House0fTheBlueLights

        Actually, I think one of the girls, they’re great girls, reads it to him.

    • Nounverb911

      Jill Stein not nominated for Golden Globes, demands recount.

      https://twitter.com/VanityFair/status/808320541362884608

      • SuspectedDemocrat

        It can only be good for our democratic process. Let her proceed.

    • cmd

      OT, but briefly mentioned in a story about Tr. attending the army navy game was that he spent the second half in Oliver North’s box.

      • bupkus23

        Oliver North has a box? What, a box of hammers?

        • tomamitai

          I think he’s in transition, and will be changing his name to Olive.

        • QHarp, Mujer malévola

          Yes. It regularly beats him at checkers.

      • mancityRed6

        the fact that he never went to prison says a lot about how journalism is where it is today.

        • cmd

          I didn’t realize that he was such a big Trump supporter, though shouldn’t be surprised.

    • Tallmutha

      What’s this about China having “Xians”? Are they afraid to spell out the name of our Lord? War on Christmas!

      • PubOption

        They used to make terracotta soldier decorations, until they discovered that plastic baubles were more profitable

        • coozledad

          And try putting a string of those motherfuckers on the roof. my back hurts just thinking about it.

    • calliecallie

      I remember something – maybe it was from a Bourne movie – about the real estate where the Berlin wall came down being the most exciting real estate development area on the planet at that time. Trump is a real estate developer. Where’s the next big land deal? Maybe all that arctic area being opened up by climate change? This would explain a great deal. He’s just looking for a great deal!
      This fucking guy cannot be sworn in as president. That’s all I’m saying.

      • bupkus23

        Anyone up for an estate in Greenland?

        • Nounverb911

          Sorry, Greenland is currently melting too quickly for any new construction.

          http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2016/10/24/greenland-is-melting

          • bupkus23

            I meant after the icecap is gone – you know, like 2 years from now ( of course, once all the weight of that ice is gone, expect seismic activity that will make California look like… well, Oklahoma.

            • Nounverb911

              Then it will be under water after the ocean rises….

          • Msgr_Moment

            There’s always a market for swampland.

      • phoenix00

        Some Philippine island once Duterte “cleanses” out the locals?

    • Hairstrike Alpha

      I’m going to miss Obama…….I have a feeling most all non-deplorable Republicans will as well.

      • bupkus23

        “Non-deplorable” Republicans????

        WTH is THAT?

        • SuspectedDemocrat

          I picture an polite, elderly gentleman who enjoys showing off his knowledge of Edmund Burke, chuckling at the latest George Will op-ed, holding court on conservative philosophy and economic theory, or simply spending a quiet evening in his private library, pet unicorn at his feet.

          • Marion in Savannah

            Cripes — you’re WAAAY too close to describing Bobo Brooks. And that way lies madness…

        • Poorly Behaved Résistanista

          Extinct.

        • Msgr_Moment

          RINOs.

    • Nounverb911

      Rand Paul seems to be growing a pair….
      https://twitter.com/RandPaul/status/807953554048741378

      • Martini Ambassador

        *chuckle-snort* Dr Rand Paul…

        • arglebargle

          I thought that was an abbreviation for Derp.

      • SuspectedDemocrat

        At least it’s not the same people who brought you WMDs in Iraq— oh, wait.

      • tomamitai

        Why’d he use the French spelling of department? Will he be running in 2020 on the Billet Libertaire?

        • Marion in Savannah

          It would appear that he’s trying to use up the excess stockpiled “letter Es” that were collected by Dan Quayle.

          • Msgr_Moment

            The National Strategic E-Stockpile. I thought it was composed of bits and bytes.

            • TJ Barke

              Gotta use them before the bit-rot sets in.

        • Thiazin Red

          Because screw rules man! Thats how libertarians roll!

          (Well that and being fans of segregation, eliminating the social safety net, fucking over anyone who isn’t wealthy, screwing the environment, etc. But legal weed man!)

        • phoenix00

          Something something Vichy French sympathizers something something

      • Doug Langley

        Yes, but remember the five minute rule.

      • Doug Langley

        Yes, but remember the five minute rule.

    • anwisok
      • nightmoth

        Darn you—the kitties made me laugh just as I was working myself up into murderous rage.

        • anwisok

          Success!

      • QHarp, Mujer malévola

        That sloth settles it– if I ever get fuck-you, ‘she’s just a little eccentric’ money, I’m going exotic petting zoo all the way.

      • Doug Langley

        Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

    • memzilla Ω

      Completely O/T, from Gin And Tacos:
      “As final exams begin, please keep the grandparents of America’s college students in your prayers as they die in unprecedented numbers over the next ten days.”

      • Nounverb911

        I thought they all died off after the Cubs won.

      • nightmoth

        now, now watch the oldz libel

      • Msgr_Moment

        Forwarded to the Department. Thanks.

    • Mr. Blobfish

      John Bolton as Assistant Secretary of State. Thanks Teen Vogue.

      • Doug Langley

        OT, but for some reason this strange eye twitch just won’t clear up.

    • Suttree

      More fuzzy cuteness.
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wa17JE8JkIA
      -found on MPS

      • Martini Ambassador

        I’m considering knitting a Santa outfit for my cats to share this holiday season. That’s not nuts, right?

        • mancityRed6

          only if they have to share it at the same time.

        • Suttree

          No, it’s adorable! Just make sure you have plenty of band-aids and bacitracin handy.

        • Kateaux

          Also, in addition to Suttree’s suggestion of band-aids and bacitracin, I strongly recommend goggles or some kind of protective eyewear. In fact, a Kevlar suit might be in order.

      • cmd

        Ok, I have not tried this because at work, but this came up in my FB feed. Claims that this Chrome extension will turn any picture of Trump that shows up on your computer to a kitten pic. I am going to try it at home for sure.
        http://www.thefrisky.com/2016-12-08/replace-every-picture-of-trump-with-kittens-thanks-to-this-life-saving-chrome-extension/?utm_source=share-fb&utm_medium=button

      • Resistance Engineer Red Bird

        squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

      • OMG!

      • The DepravedDemmeFatale

        goats deserve good press.
        they’re adorable!
        those tails!

        • Suttree

          Flippy wigglers!

    • They really aren’t even trying to hide just how little the care for the business of actual government and just how badly they plan on using the government to loot the economy and grease their own pockets.

    • Alexander Stallwitz

      Did i wake up in some bizarre paraellel universe? The Republicans love Russia? Teen Vogue is the pinacle of Journalism? Has the whole world gone mad! ?

      • At some point we all slipped into the darkest timeline and didn’t realize it. I’m practicing up on my paintball skills.

      • Msgr_Moment

        Didn’t anybody pass you some brown acid? It’s the tits, man.

      • puredog

        No, if the world had gone mad, Rick Perry would be running the Department of Energy.

        • Crystalclear12

          Not funny😕

      • TJ Barke

        Life has become an Onion article…

      • Doug Langley

        I remember the good ole’ dayz when anyone saying something even remotely flattering to the Russians was hauled before the House Un-American Activities Committee and third-degreed until they cried Uncle.

        • Historicat

          In these good new days you’ll be hauled before HUAAC for saying anything remotely disparaging of our good friends the Russians.

    • coozledad
      • Resistance Engineer Red Bird

        Ni hao

    • Duke

      I was watching Jack Van Impe last night (mainly to check out Rexella) and he cited Brietbart news twice that I saw in melt-down worthy rants against Muslims.

      They’ve got a whole ecosystem going.

      It’s up to Teen Vogue to expose this.

      • mancityRed6

        the fact that Jack is still alive proves there is no god.

        • Duke

          They believe that completely differently.

          Go figure.

    • QHarp, Mujer malévola

      Remember back in the Bush days when Naomi Wolf was like, ‘This is how fascism comes to America,’ and people were like, ‘That seems a little bonkers, Naomi Wolf’? Man, those were some good fuckin’ times.

    • Lefty Frizzell

      Yes! Department of Energy is the third agency Rick Perry wanted to scrap, but forgot the name of. He’s the perfect choice to head it in Trump’s America.

      • Msgr_Moment

        Maybe he’ll forget his keys.

    • SuspectedDemocrat

      I like this story arc they’ve drawn out: “How can you believe anything anymore after all the conspiracy theories and fake news we’ve been spreading around the past year?”

      Really fucking hilarious. Bravo. Author! Author!

      • Msgr_Moment

        Bullshitters gonna bullshit.

    • Pissed de Résistance

      Donald Trump skips his intel briefings because “[he’s], like, a smart person,” who doesn’t need to be bothered with facts, and data, and troops positions, etc. etc.

      On the other hand, he’s an expert at sneak attacks. Just ask him.

      • eka

        i’ll believe it. you don’t even need to ask him – just ask all the women who fell victim to his sneak attacks.

    • Vincent Ricola

      OT – after a month of hating CNN, I turned it on to see if there was any good (lol) discussion on Russia since we’re finally talking about it 6 months too late and all I see is a stupid lying turtle on my screen. Back to reruns of sexy True Blood on HBOGO, I guess.

      • Just watch the scenes with Erik and Pam

      • Marion in Savannah

        I’ve been immersing myself in “Penny Dreadful” on Netflix…

        • Vincent Ricola

          I just got done with that one! I loved season 2.

          • Poorly Behaved Résistanista

            I’m watching “The Fall,” it’s very good even if the core of it is violence against women.

            • Vincent Ricola

              I just googled this one and might have to check it out. I love Gillian Anderson.

            • She is excellent in it

          • Serai 1

            Get back to me when you’ve seen Season 3.

            I’M STILL NOT OVER THAT. HEAR ME, LOGAN? I’LL NEVER GET OVER THAT.

        • Penny Dreadful

          An excellent choice.

        • Historicat

          Ooh – I need to go update my queue!

      • Mintie

        I’ve been mainlining Medieval English period dramas myself. I find them strangely relaxing, if only because the greedy assholes get beheaded in the end.

      • The DepravedDemmeFatale

        just finished Narcos, (Netflix) where Pablo Escobar finally got his.
        when i see things like this, i always wonder: “what did they think would happen?!”
        His wife was all upset and crying, and i was just thinking, “duh! Did you see this ending any other way when you married a drug lord?”

      • BigHorn

        I did that too. Then I saw Jeffrey Lord. It took all of 10 seconds.

    • Pissed de Résistance

      “Rick Perry is being considered to head the Department of Energy where he’ll probably lay himself off (if he can remember how to find it). Oops!”

      Well, this is fucking great. Perry’s got Nuclear (both kinds) policy as head of Dept. of Energy, and Trump’s got the codes.

      It’s been nice knowing you kids.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Send the goat to tend the cabbage. What could go wrong?

      • Wombat

        So we’re going to go from a nuclear physicist to…Rick Perry?

        Well, I’d better get going. That fallout bunker won’t build itself.

      • Poorly Behaved Résistanista

        We spent the past year and the last of our monies putting in a pool. Fuck, shoulda gone with the bunker, now it’s too late. Buh-bye.

      • Doug Langley

        Maybe I’m naive, but wasn’t Perry indicted? Won’t be it be tricky running the office from cell block H?

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      And I guess today it’s Lockheed-Martin’s turn in the barrel. Trump blisters them on Twitter for the “out of control” costs of the F-35 (which is true, but kinda not something a President should be saying), and their stock immediately gets hosed.

      • Marion in Savannah

        Well, I’m sure his kids sold short, so win-win, right?

    • Msgr_Moment

      Rethuglican reply to the hacking:
      http://i.imgur.com/Un1rsbA.jpg

      • phoenix00

        The concept is completely Aliens.

    • Jeffocaster in the East

      At least the Trump Presidency won’t be boring. Terrifying, depressing, making one so angry it would blister paint off the wall. But not boring.

    • Nounverb911

      Bill Murray gives Obama golf tips for his retirement.

      https://twitter.com/WhiteHouse/status/808137505476317184

      • Kooolest G

        not to nitpick, but bill murray is 66. he doesn’t need obamacare, he has medicare. but it’s still awesome that he was invited to putt at the WH. maybe next year chachi can do the same

      • Doug Langley

        Take a good look, people. That’s the last we’ll see of the Oval Office before it becomes gold plated and, and . . . oh, my stomach.

    • Poorly Behaved Résistanista

      I notice the puppy is just as happy to nom-nom-nom on the string as chase the ball (psst, puppy, you’re doing it wrong!).

      • Marion in Savannah

        Puppies will nom-nom-nom on ANYTHING and pretty much everything. If you’ve got a puppy learn to lock up your shoes…

        • Erala Contratista

          Also your socks and kitchen cabinets and table and chairs and, oh, I don’t know. I lost track.

        • Bill Slider

          I have two cats that destroy the back ot tennis shoes, and will drag a shoe by the back and drag it into another room.

      • Serai 1

        Puppies never do ANYTHING wrong!

      • The DepravedDemmeFatale

        classic puppy v. kitten.
        the dog wants to catch and chew the ball and string, while the cat just wants to chase it.
        cute indeed!

    • snark-lurker

      we have become the huddled masses

    • Señor Skwerl!

      Do the Russians love their hackers too?

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n4RjJKxsamQ

    • Thaumaturgist

      Trump doesn’t need the briefings anyway. He finds out everything he needs or know by reading his own tweets.

      • An Outhouse for the Resistance

        and FOX News and his stories.

      • phoenix00

        That’s exactly what Steve Bannon is for!

    • azeyote

      well Chinese goods will cost more at walmart for those that go there – but man Russian vodka is gonna be damn near free ( we all will need to get as hammered as the ruskies do to maintain the blur ) – but if ya don’t like booze think how cheap a glass of crude will be –

      • Incoming Ham

        Regular cheap Russian vodka is basically a cheap glass of potato turpentine. You could strip paint with it. It’s a multipurpose liquid.

    • TheGrandWaz00

      It’s like everything is being narrated by Don LaFontaine “In a world gone ______”

    • Oblios_Cap

      That one-way ticket to Mars is looking better and better.

    • Requin de la Résistance

      how the FBI and the CIA don’t have a “consensus view,”

      How would Kellyanne or her “boss” know WHEN THEY DON’T SHOW UP AT THE FUCKING BRIEFINGS?

      • Thaumaturgist

        FBI was working for Trump too. Remember Comey and his letter? Did the FBI investigate Russian hacking the Democrat Party the way the FBI investigated Anthony Weiner’s emails? The only meaningful function of the FBI is to occupy bureaucratic trip to keep CIA from spying on Americans and the FBI is acting like CIA is moving into its territory by talking about it the .russian hacks.

        • Historicat

          That’s not fair – the FBI is also good at tracking dangerous groups like environmentalists and peace activists.

        • To be fair, I believe that it’s only the NYC office of the FBI who were #NeverHillz lunatics.

    • BMW

      Every time Priebus speaks it feels like a hack attack.

      • BigHorn

        Yeah, what’s up with that, stroke?

    • BMW

      “A senior American law enforcement official said the F.B.I. believed that the Russians probably had a combination of goals, including damaging Mrs. Clinton and undermining American democratic institutions. Whether one of those goals was to install Mr. Trump remains unclear to the F.B.I., he said.

      “The official played down any disagreement between the F.B.I. and the C.I.A., and suggested that the C.I.A.’s conclusions were probably more nuanced than they were being framed in the news media.”

      Basically they are both saying Russia was doing stuff to hurt Clinton but can’t agree why and the ambassadors from Trumpland are portraying this as the FBI and CIA disagree on if Russia did anything at all. Do I have the jist of it?

    • Saxo the Grammarian

      The way I see it, this situation is a test of the soundness and robustness of our democratic and constitutional system IF we are willing to do the necessaries to make the system work as intended. Call your congresscritters. Make our concerns impossible to ignore.

    • Panika MCD

      Rick Perry won’t lay himself off. he’ll just change the name to “the Department of Railroads” to be in line with TX.

    • Crystalclear12

      Remember it’s the holidays, so make sure to eggnog as your mixer!

    • An Outhouse for the Resistance

      It will be interesting to see how long the government can run without department heads since non of Trump’s appointments have a rat’s ass chance in passing. Except Mrs. McConnell, she’ll pass because she ran something else under W. so it would be hypocritical to say she’s not qualified now even if she isn’t.

      • Serai 1

        With the wingnuts in the majority, I wouldn’t make any predictions about which appointments of his will pass.

      • Kooolest G

        until they figure out that mrs mcconnell got the job in exchange for mr mcconnell looking the other way about the russian hacking.

      • disqus_lWwzrwNaw6

        They’ll all pass, unless Democrats were to do what they’re not going to do, and take the reckless, desperate, and deeply necessary step of starting to act like an opposition party (and the last guardian of democracy itself, as America tumbles at breakneck speeds into outright fascism).

        The only way to restore some semblance of a democracy (or of a republic–I threw that in for those John Birch crazies who always chime in to change the subject by saying, “America is not a democracy, you clueless commie, it’s a republic”) is for Democrats to realize the stakes are higher than themselves, and to act with unity and nobility.

        This is something they are not going to do. They couldn’t even stand up to defend health care for dying coal miners.

        They can’t face the nasty headlines at the New York Times, or the ugly panel conversations on the network shows on Sunday morning, those festive gatherings when Republican operatives and Republican politicians are invited in to the network studios each week to deny all charges and to suggest that Democrats, political protests, unions, public schools, regulations, the safety net, taxes on wealth, anti-Republican news outlets, and dissenting professors probably need to be banned, for the sake of the Freedom Agenda.

        Our poor Democrats in Washington don’t ever want to be the Democrat held up by John Dickerson or Chuck Todd or George Stephanopoulos in a brief, brutally-edited clip just before the panel discussion (three Republican operatives, a retired Republican politician, and two right-wing journalists join Chuck to talk about the Week In Review), as an example of a Democrat who is Just Being Political And Messing Up All The Good Stuff When Donald Trump Is Only Trying To Make America Great Again And Why Won’t Democrats Give Him A Chance Are They Working For A Foreign Power Or Something (No Republican Would Ever Work For A Foreign Power)?

        So Donald’s deranged and corrosive nominees will, on the whole, be confirmed. A few Democrats may make some critical comments, and these will either be entirely ignored by the nightly newscasts, or edited down to make the Democrats look really dreadful, and after this all the Democrats will simply fall silent and glumly vote, with enough Red State Democrats breaking in favor of the nominees to assure victory.

        Democrats don’t seem to want to fight for the democracy, which is really sad, because if they don’t, it’s gone. I mean, it’s fundamentally gone already, but in theory it would still be possible to get it back, if people recognized how high-stakes this all is, and really, really fought, and refused to be cowed by the network news operations.

        But they’re not going to fight. It’s just a fact.

      • AnnieGetYerFun

        She was Secretary of Labor under Bush. I know because she’s an alum from my college and probably the only one of us to attain an office that high-up in the gubmint, so we innocent graduates of Mt Holyoke always get news about her even though we are collectively horrified by her politics.

    • Kooolest G

      fuck the hack attack, what about the zack attack
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fP0FeLyeFkU

    • Fartknocker

      Trump’s choice for Rick (I Fuck Goats) Perry for DOE, as the Department name has only six letters and three syllables, which is the peak output of Rick Perry’s brain. Plus, he has a ranch named Niggerhead, so he’ll be a hoot with the GOP at the parties and functions.

    • Bill Slider

      I see a new love triangle: CIA, FBI, that Orange Thing.

      • phoenix00

        …. while Putin and Duterte watch longingly…..

    • Bill Slider

      Trump’s plan to double our national defense appears not on spending tons more money, but on a pre-Christmas, after Christmas sale, on the price of military aircraft. First Boeing, now Lockhead Martin. Watch out Cessna, that Piper Cub could be next.

    • BetsyBleedingheart

      The shenanigans at the SSA are deeply concerning to me. Most of my clients get entitlements of some kind from Social Security and desperately need that money to live. It’s not a lot, either. My guys average around $700/month and most are not able to work. It’s very very scary.

      • lroom

        I’m living on social security and disability so this is freaking me out. It’s nowhere near $700 and after paying bills there is not much left over. If these assholes start messing around with it I’ll be seriously screwed.

      • And most of them voted for Trump. They’ve killed us all.

        • Mehmeisterjr

          I didn’t, but that’s just me and the popular vote.

    • SullivanSt

      Jesus in a bathrobe still with the Rick Perry for Secretary of Energy?

      Hasn’t B Barry Bamz beaten it through Trump’s weasel-wrapped thick skull that the Department of Energy IS THE AGENCY THAT MANAGES OUR NUCLEAR WEAPONS PROGRAMS yet?

      Holy fucking shit we’re all going to die.

      • BigHorn

        Jesus in a bathrobe is tied up at the moment having a caricature made with the HUD head.

      • Incoming Ham

        What? It’s not the agency that allows freshly minted cabinet members to exploit natural resources and manipulate the commodities market?

    • phoenix00

      Pence sent an email that he’s trying to quash? Why hasn’t Issa and Chaffetz started 10 Congressional investigations?

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